ChampangeAndComplaints

Orange you glad I didn’t say banana

I enjoy letting out my feelings in large chunks, like how I used to on here. I've been struggling with the concept in which I feel like I don't have my own personality. I have always felt like a sponge, soaking up the personality and traits of everyone around me and never forming my own. While I was talking about this with my boyfriend, he tried to tell me that I had plenty of personality, which I could agree but none of it feels like me. I know that this feeling will soon subside, and that it's a very normal feeling to have. Especially at this empty point of my life, the summer after I graduate and before I move away. It's hard and it's tough but the only thing to help this is to do what makes me happy, be who makes me happy. It's not such a negative thing, it can be a way to recenter with myself, remembering my interests and rediscovering hobbies.

To m, I find it hard to say yes because it wasn't with a penis, though that did happen twice. The two incidents that it happened with another girl, I never wanted it. Not at all. Yet we were young so I never put much thought into it. It still scares me sometimes to rethink the moments because it was scary, and I didn't want to be fingered or eaten out by who I thought was a friend of mine. It's just confusing and I'm lost. This seems like a Reddit post but I find myself more comfortable here. Thanks!