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Tuvok calls Janeway his friend. T’Pol called Archer her friend if I remember correctly (and there’s a whole thing about how Enterprise tried to make Archer and T’Pol a thing, thereby directly paralleling Jim and Spock by nature, but that’s for another day).

So why does Spock feel ashamed?

Shame is a human emotion, so Tuvok and T’Pol won’t indulge shame, but Vulcans have also claimed friendship is unique to humans, but they have friends.

It stands to reason that one would only feel shame in a friendship if they believe that friendship should not exist in the form it does.

Tuvok and T’Pol don’t feel shame because their friendships exist in a form acceptable to Vulcan culture, and they have perhaps rationalized calling it “friendship” for the sake of translation between cultures.

Spock could have come to this rationale, as well, but he didn’t. Why? Because his “friendship” with Jim does not exist within the bounds of acceptable (non-intimate) Vulcan relationships.

JAMES T. KIRK SEARCHED THE GALAXY FOR SPOCK'S LITERAL MIND AND THAT MIND FOUND KIRK ON ITS OWN AND THE FIRST THING IT SAYS IS "Captain, there's a definite pleasurable expirience connected to the hearing of your voice".

⚠️Spoiler warning for the entire novel!⚠️

⛔️tw: depression, suicidal ideation, eating disorders, B*n H*pe⛔️

Novel by Alice Oseman (she/they) @aliceoseman

Compiled by yours truly @90beesinatrenchcoat as planning for a critical analysis for my Capstone course to get my BFA in Creative Writing. Because Alice Oseman is the greatest and is helping me graduate 😌

Opening quote:

“And your defect is a propensity to hate everybody.”

“And yours,” he replied with a smile, “is to wilfully to misunderstand them.”

Pride and Prejudice Jane Austen

Characters

“Our Lot” a group of friends, in which Tori doesn't quite fit in.

Victoria Spring, introduced pg. 3. “My name is Victoria Spring. I think you should know that I make up a lot of stuff in my head and then get sad about it. I like to sleep and I like to blog. I am going to die someday.” “Nothing. I am a vacuum. I am a void. I am nothing” (15).

Rebecca “Becky” Allen, introduced pg. 3 “Rebecca Allen is probably my only real friend at the moment. She is also probably my best friend. I am as yet unsure whether these two facts are related” (4).

Evelyn Foley. “Evelyn is considered ‘alternative’ because she has messy hair and wears cool necklaces” (5).

Lauren Romily “a social smoker and seems to love chaos” (23).

Rita - Friend. Not really super important to Tori? To the point that I didn't even notice her first mention.

Lucas Ryan, introduced pg. 25. He is the blond guy in skinny trousers referred to by Michael. Tori’s childhood best friend, who she hasn’t talked to in years.

Michael Holden. Introduced pg. 8. “He’s a very ordinary-looking, not ugly but not hot, miscellaneous boy. His most noticeable feature is a pair of large, thick-framed square glasses that sort of make him look like he’s wearing 3D cinema glasses. He’s tall and has a side parting. In one hand, he holds a mug; in the other a piece of paper and his school planner.”

Nick, introduced p.35. “At first glance, Nicholas Nelson, a Year 12 like me, looks exactly like the kind of scary lads you’d see crammed at the back of the school bus, ready to throw sandwiches at you. But in reality, Nick is actually the human embodiment of a golden retriever puppy, as well as being Truham’s rugby captain and a genuinely lovely person. I can’t really remember when Nick and Charlie became Nick-and-Charlie, but Nick has stuck with Charlie through all the hardest parts of his mental illness, so, in my book, he’s definitely all right” (37).

Charlie. “My brother, Charles Spring, is fifteen years old and a Year 11 at Truham Grammar. In my opinion, he is the nicest person in the history of the universe and I know that ‘nice’ is kind of a meaningless word, but that’s what makes it so powerful. It’s very hard to simply be a ‘nice’ person because there are a lot of things that can get in the way” (35). He’s struggling with an eating disorder.

Oliver, seven years old. Introduced p. 36.

Mr Kent, Deputy Head, resembles Alan Rickman, Tori’s English teacher.

Miss Strasser, in Mr. Kent’s posse and only likely 5 years older than year 12s

Zelda, Head Girl

Mrs Lemaire, Headmistress, rumored to be a member of French government, never present in the school

Mum (Jane Spring) introduced p.31. “She’s very much like me, if you think about it. She’s in love with Microsoft Excel the way I’m in love with Google Chrome. She asks me how my day was, but I just shrug and say that it was fine, because I’m fairly sure she doesn’t care what my answer is. It’s because we’re so similar that we stopped talking to each other so much. When we do talk, we either struggle to find things to say or we just get angry, so apparently we’ve reached a mutual agreement that there’s really no point trying any more. I’m not too bothered.”

Dad (Julio Spring)– “Dad’s quite chatty, even if everything he says is extraordinarily irrelevant to my life” (32).

Jack, Becky’s almost-boyfriend. (32). They had sex, it throws Tori for a loop (34).

Ben Hope. “Ben Hope is the guy at Higgs. And, by the guy, I mean that one boy in the sixth form that every single girl in the entire school has a crush on. There’s always one. Tall and slim-built. Skinny trousers and tight shirts. He usually straightens his dark brown hair and, I swear to God, it defies gravity because it swishes in a kind of organized vortex, but, when he doesn’t straighten it, it’s all curly and he just looks so cute you want to die. He always appears to be serene. He skateboards. I, personally, do not ‘fancy’ him. I’m just trying to express his perfection” (45).

Grandma and Grandad introduced p.246. Doesn't know much about their grandkids. Says accidentally offensive and uncomfortable things. Generally unlikeable.

Quiff Guy Evelyn’s secret boyfriend and part of Solitaire. Name revealed as Aaron Ridley on p.359

Solitaire.co.uk

List of all occurrences:

Introduced as an empty troll blog (13).

First Prank: star wars music and photoshopped photos of Kent (star wars is a major obsession of Tori’s from when she was younger) (22-23).

Solitaire: Patience Kills (30).

Clocks replaced by pieces of paper reading “Tempus Fugit” (67). Hysteria in school assembly over playing Justin Timberlake’s ‘SexyBack.’ Kent walked up hall stage stairs and the word ‘SWAG’ appeared on the projector screen (68).

Two cats let loose in school (68). Tori quite likes cats.

Madonna’s ‘Material Girl’ stuck on repeat (69) which Tori had an obsession with once.

Team Ops intersected by Solitaire (86). Video footage makes Tori cry. Tori is locked in C13.

First Solitaire meet-up announced (93).

The school computers are locked to only accessing the Solitaire blog displaying a topless Jake Gyllenhaal and a message (170).

Photo of a hand, about to break the glass of the school fire alarm button. Text reads: “DO I DARE/ DISTURB. THE UNIVERSE?” (180).

At the first meet-up, which is a house party, the post reveals that Ben Hope hurt a Year 11 (228).

Mob beats up Ben Hope because of Solitaire’s blog post (232).

Year 7s given party poppers and release them over the field (257).

Gif of little boy blowing bubbles out of a plastic pot (272).

Flyers are spread at The Clay music festival that have an anarchy symbol and say FRIDAY (279).

Hijacks music festival between artists. Takes over the screen and has a distorted voice announcer talk about Friday. Fireworks go off in the crowd. (287).

Countdown timer on the blog for Friday. Kent’s lectern with the anarchy symbol is moved to the middle of the field (313). The lectern is set on fire.

The Final Countdown plays out over the tannoy. The posters are joined by  pictures of Nelson Mandela, Desmond Tutu, Abraham Lincoln, Emmeline Pankhurst, Rage Against the Machine. (323).

Solitaire origins revealed in chapter 13

New blog post appears Thursday night, talking about Solitaire’s greatest operation (349)

Sets Higgs on fire (Part 2 Chapter 116).

Place

“There are two grammar schools in our town: Harvey Greene Grammar School for Girls, or ‘Higgs’ as it is popularly known, and Truham Grammar School for Boys. Both schools, however, accept all genders in Years 12 and 13, the two final years of school known countrywide as the sixth form. So, now that I am in Year 12, I have had to face a sudden influx of guys. Boys at Higgs are on a par with mythical creatures and having an actual real boyfriend puts you at the head of the social hierarchy, but personally, thinking or talking too much about ‘boy issues’ makes me want to shoot myself in the face” (6).

C16 (computer room), Kent’s classroom, and the art conservatory are also main settings. We occasionally go to various houses: Tori’s house, Michael’s house, and house parties at Solitaire (revealed to be an empty house owned by Lucas’ parents), or Becky’s house (where Ben Hope is beaten up). We know there’s a field, a river, a festival at a place called The Clay, a riverside café, and an ice rink.

Main Tools

Dialogue – lots of dialogue, between major and minor characters. Sets us in time and makes it feel realistic, but also reveals a lot about the speaker and about Tori with her internal reactions

POV: First person, present tense, Tori Spring’s point of view.

Interiority. Alice does a good job portraying Tori’s mental health struggles and revealing her character through her thoughts.

Multimedia. Alice incorporates texting, blogs, and phone calls in creative ways that serves to place the reader in time.

Part 1

Elizabeth Bennet: Do you dance, Mr Darcy?

Mr Darcy: Not if I can help it.

Pride and Prejudice (2005)

One pp. 3-16

Introduces Tori, with some brief characterization. Introduces Higgs setting. Introduces “Our Lot”, Becky and Evelyn. Tori discovers Solitaire.co.uk through post its popping up throughout the school leading her to computer room C16. Meets Michael Holden, doesn’t know what to make of him. He was asked to look for her by a “Blond guy…skinny trousers” (10). Solitaire.co.uk is empty which Tori finds strangely disappointing.

Two pp. 17-28

More characterization of students at Higgs. Tori describes the groups, and feels like she doesn’t fit into any of the groups. During sixth form meeting, first Solitaire prank occurs. Blog is updated with a photo of Kent’s reaction to the prank. Students start really liking Solitaire. Tori feels weird about it. Is reintroduced to her primary school best friend, Lucas.

Three pp. 29-41

Tori’s blog introduced. Household/family vibes established, as she discusses relationship with parents, and then interacts with her brothers and Nick as they build a cardboard tractor. The boys like Lucas Ryan but are wary of Michael Holden. Nick says he’s a legend for his pranks, but Charlie finds him a bit scary. Charlie heard a rumor he isn’t straight. Musings on if Michael could be behind Solitaire, but Tori isn’t so sure.

Four pp. 42-53

Start of term thing at Pizza Express. Lucas is there, as well as Evelyn, Lauren, and Becky. Introduced to Ben Hope. Michael shows up. He came all the way to tell Tori something that he has forgotten. Tori and him establish whether they are friends (51).

Five pp.54-61

Tori and Michael discuss sexuality. Michael is unlabeled. They walk home together, and discuss their names, and Michael again asks why they can’t be friends. He seems desperate to be her friend. He tells her what he forgot: that they had met before, when he gave her a tour around Truham. She remarks that he seemed normal then. He replies: “For most people, normal is their default setting. But for some, like you and me, normal is something we have to bring out, like putting on a suit for a posh dinner” (61).

Six pp.62-66

Conflict with Mum over Oliver and video games. Blogging and introspection.

Seven pp. 67-76

More Solitaire pranks. Tori and Lucas catch up.

Eight pp.77-81

Zelda nominates Tori for Operation Inconspicuous to stake out Solitaire. Becky likes Ben, Jack is history. Friendship is a bit rocky, as Becky feels like Tori doesn’t care/finds her annoying.

Nine pp. 82-96

The stakeout. Tori gets locked in C13 with Solitaire’s message. She calls Michael, wondering if he is even a real person. He comes to let her out but wants to see her smile first as proof that she’s a real person. They continue the Solitaire investigation. When Zelda shows up, Michael disappears and Tori wonders what made him show up to school at 7am.

Ten pp.97-102

Tori is thrown off all day. Another awkward interaction with Lucas. Tells Charlie everything, who thinks she shouldn’t spend so much time with Michael. Some household moments, awkward interactions surrounding Charlie’s ED, and then Tori watches movies and blogs.

Eleven pp.103-113

Tori hangs out in Becky’s bedroom, discussing possible costumes for Becky’s birthday party. Tori goes home and dresses as Wednesday Addams. Tori goes to the party. Becky shares that Ben Hope asked her out. Anonymous message on her blog reads “Thought for the day: Why do cars always part for ambulances? (109). Tori wants to leave the party, but Michael (dressed as Sherlock) shows up and convinces her to stay and watch a movie with him upstairs.

Twelve pp.114-126

Michael and Tori have conversations and discuss what to watch—Michael thinks Beauty and the Beast will do Tori good. In this conversation we learn Tori was born the day Kurt Cobain killed himself. Michael cries during Beauty and the Beast, and Tori isn’t sure how to respond to that. Later, they talk about Michael knowing Charlie, and Tori tells him about Charlie’s ED and everything. They almost fall asleep. At 1:39am, Oliver calls, because Charlie locked himself in the kitchen. They run to get home, intersected by a very drunk Becky. They get on Michael’s bike and go home. “I realise that I’m happy even though I shouldn’t be, and the conflicting emotion only makes the moment more insane, more radiant, more immeasurable” (125).

Thirteen pp.127-133

Tori gets inside and sends Oliver to bed. She gets into the kitchen and discovers Charlie has relapsed, not touching his food, organizing everything in the fridge, and cutting himself. He and Nick had an argument, so she called Nick and he came back. Afterward, Tori calls her parents and is obviously shaken up, but even more bothered by how calm her dad is on the phone. “I listen to the dark. They’re all coming to get you. Your heartbeats are footsteps. Your brother is unwell. You don’t have any friends. Nobody feels bad for you. Beauty and the Beast isn’t real. It’s funny because it’s true. Don’t be sad any more. Don’t be sad any more” (133).

Fourteen pp.134-141

Michael calls Tori. He comes over, greets her with a hug, makes tea, meets Oliver. Ends up spending the day there, meets the rest of Tori’s family.

Fifteen pp.142-146

Tori goes to Michael’s house.

Sixteen pp.147-160

They walk hand in hand, non-romantically. He takes her to a riverside café. They talk. Michael missed the deadline to apply to schools, and hates school. Michael suggests that Solitaire might somehow be connected to Tori, because all the pranks have been connected to her interests. He takes her to the ice rink and she sees that he’s an insane skater. They continue walking, and eventually lie down in the grass. A new anonymous message pops up: “Thought for the day: Why do people leave newspapers on trains?” (155). They talk for awhile.

Seventeen pp. 161-165

They arrive home. Michael brings up the friendship question again. He says, “All friendships are selfish. Maybe if we were all selfless, we would leave each other alone” (162). They have their first fight, because Tori can’t figure out if he’s in love with her, and her pessimism grates on him. “Maybe you are a manically depressed psychopath” (163). Charlie is at Nick’s. She thinks about Michael, and Becky, and how much Becky will talk about Ben, and “I think about who else I could hang around with. There isn’t anyone. I think about how I do not want to leave this house ever again. I think about whether I had any homework to do this weekend. I think about what a dreadful person I am” (165).

Eighteen pp. 166-178

Becky is with Ben, and they learn Ben knew Charlie. Lucas comes back over to Tori and they have another awkward encounter. Solitaire strikes again, Kent doubles down trying to get it under control. Hangs out with Our Lot, more dialogue. That night the family accompanies Charlie to his appointment with his psychiatrist. In the waiting room, Charlie asks Tori why they haven’t been talking. They clear the air, and start catching up. Charlie finds out about Becky dating Ben Hope. Charlie decides he’ll give Michael a chance. “Michael’s okay. He’s proven that. I don’t understand why you can’t accept things like this. If you can’t accept things you don’t understand, then you’ll spend your life questioning everything. Then you’ll have to live out your life in your own head.” …. “Is that a bad thing?” I ask. “Victoria, that is how you end up in a place like this.” (178).

Nineteen pp.179-181

Fire alarm goes off in Period 5. She sees Michael and contemplates. She sees others, wonders if Lucas and Evelyn are secretly dating. On the Solitaire Blog, there’s a new post. Photo of a hand, about to break the glass of the school fire alarm button. Text reads: “DO I DARE/ DISTURB. THE UNIVERSE?” (180).

Twenty pp.182-186

Tori calls Michael.

Twenty-One pp.187-189

Tori rides with Charlie to school. Gets paired with Ben Hope in maths. He asks about Charlie.

Twenty-Two pp.190-193

Lucas and Tori talk, she asks about Evelyn. Becky comes over. Later, Tori sees Michael. He reminds her to show up to the first Solitaire meet up on Saturday.

Twenty-Three pp.194-203

On Friday before the party, Nick, Tori, Michael, Becky, and Lucas wait for Charlie and Ben outside Truham. They go in looking for them, only to find them in a fight. Ben is yelling that Charlie spread lies about them to Tori, and punches Charlie in the face. They intervene. Tori thinks Becky will break up with Ben.

Twenty-Four pp. 204-214

On Saturday morning, Tori sleeps in and is dead to the world. Finally gets up. Charlie lied about his face to his parents, said he was hit by a cricket bat. Michael calls her from the National Youth Speed Skating Semi-Finals, which she had no idea he was in. She realizes that’s what he was trying to invite her to, but she didn’t realize. She goes to the rink and catches the end, where Michael comes in second and is angry. She’s shocked, having her perception of him turned so drastically upside down.

Twenty-Five pp.215-224

The Solitaire house party. Tori and Michael dance.

Twenty-Six pp. 225-229

Tori discovers Becky is still with Ben, and feels betrayed. They have a fight. Solitaire posts, outing Ben Hope as a bully and homophobe who deliberately hurt a Year 11.

Twenty-Seven pp. 230-234

The partyers descend like a mob on Ben Hope, beating him up. No one intervenes. Nick and Charlie call 999. Tori really starts to believe that somehow Solitaire all links back to her. “This is what we are. Solitaire. We could just – they just – they’ll kill him. You think you’ve met bad people, and then you meet people who are worse. They’re doing nothing – they’re not – we’re just as bad. We’re just as bad for doing nothing. We don’t care. We don’t care that they could kill him—” (232). Michael wants to take her home, she argues, and makes a run for it. “I’m out of the garden. I’m out of the world. The giants and demons are rising and I am chasing them. I’m pretty sure I’m going to be sick. Am I hallucinating this? I am not the hero. It's funny because it’s true. I begin to laugh, or maybe I’m crying. Maybe I don’t care any more. Maybe I’m going to pass out. Maybe I’ll die when I’m twenty-seven.”

Part 2

Donnie: A storm is coming, Frank says. A storm that will swallow the children. And I will deliver them from the kingdom of pain. I will deliver the children back to their doorsteps. I’ll send the monsters back to their doorsteps. I’ll send the monsters back to the underground. I’ll send them back to a place where no one else can see them. Except for me, ‘cause I am Donnie Darko.

Donnie Darko: The Director’s Cut (2004)

One pp. 235-241

Tori thinks back on Lucas’s crying. She’s wandering the school on Monday, can’t find Lucas or Michael. She wants to apologize for standing Lucas up on Saturday. New anon text: “Thought for the day: What is the point in studying literature?” (237). Our Lot has not talked to Tori. Ben did not go to the hospital, was nowhere near death. Kent discusses Tori’s essay on Pride and Prejudice, says it’s a very angry essay. They discuss her falling grades.

Two pp.242-245

Tori finds Lucas and Evelyn. She confronts Lucas, apologizes, tries to figure out why he’s avoiding her. He leaves because he can’t do this and leaves his locker slightly open. With the corridor smelling like mouldy eggs, she takes a peek at a sheet about dealing with stress and a sketch of a girl looking like scream painting and then leaves.

Three pp. 246-251

There’s an awkward family dinner with Grandma and Granddad, who make snide comments about Charlie’s eating and don’t realize he’s gay. Tori texts with Lucas and they decide to meet up. When she gets there, she waits awhile, only for him to text “Sorry x” and stand her up.

Four pp. 252-257

At a school assembly, Rita warns Tori she’s isolating herself. Tori looks for Michael, when she can’t find him, googles him. Year 7s pull a prank, blasting party popper streamers into the air, and Tori hates herself for finding the prank amusing.

Five pp.258-265

Tori finally finds Michael and finds out he was suspended for swearing at Kent. They talk about the prank and realize it’s strange that it happened while Tori was on break sitting in the field. She finds out Michael asked Charlie about her and doesn’t like that people worry about her. “I don’t want people to be worried about me. There’s nothing to worry about. I don’t want people to try and understand why I am the way I am, because I should be the first person to understand that. And I don’t understand yet. I don’t want people to interfere. I don’t want people in my head, picking out this and that, permanently picking up the broken pieces of me. If that’s what friends do, then I don’t want any….I start to think about four weeks ago, when I didn’t know Michael. When Solitaire hadn’t happened. I am aware that I feel sadder about things now. A lot of things around me have been very sad, and I seem to be the only one who can see it. Becky, for example. Lucas. Ben Hope. Solitaire. Everyone is okay with hurting people. Or maybe they cannot see that they’re hurting people. But I can” (264-265).

Six pp.266-270

Tori and Kent talk about her new essay which she wrote normally, and Kent wants to know what she really thinks. They talk about it, and friendship, and Kent is pushing her to change her ways.

Seven pp.271-276

Anon: “Thought for the day: Why do people believe in God?” New gif on Solitaire blog of a boy blowing bubbles. Tori gets home and cries to Charlie. She goes through a box of keepsakes, reads a page from her diary, and shreds it up. Finds an empty pot of bubbles in the box. Tori used to love bubbles. She realizes it’s all connected to her, and she throws up. She has a rough time, and decides she has to do something about Solitaire.

Eight pp.277-284

Nick and Charlie take Tori to a music festival. They separate from each other in the crowd. Tori notices a flyer with an anarchy symbol that says “Friday” on it. Tori finds Lucas in the crowd and drags him to somewhere they can talk. He says it’s hard to be around her, she doesn’t understand. She goes on a rant, and spills about how Charlie hurting himself affected her, and how he wrote her a card apologizing, and on the card there was a cake. Lucas walks away from her.

Nine pp. 285-294

Nick and Charlie call Tori, tells her she needs to come to the car because something is happening. Solitaire hijacks the show. Fireworks go off in the crowd. Tori spots Michael across the river where it’s narrow and she can hear him. She spots a firework that is about to go off and hit her. They both jump into the river, but Tori’s sleeve gets caught by the firework and set on fire, even when she plunges it into the river she’s injured. “The fireworks keep going, never-ending, and Michael’s face keeps flashing in rainbow colours and the light gleams from his glasses and several flyers swirl around us like we’re trapped in a hurricane and the black water strangles us and we’re so close and there are people shouting at us and pointing but I really couldn’t give a crap and the cold has dissolved into some kind of numb ache but it barely registers and I think the tears freeze on my cheeks and I don’t really know what happens but through some kind of planetary force I find myself holding him like I don’t know what else to do and he’s holding me like I’m sinking and I think he kisses the top of my head and It might just be a snowflake but he definitely whispers “nobody cries alone” or it might have been “nobody dies alone” and I feel that as long as I stay here then there might be some kind of tiny chance that there is something remotely good in this world and the last thing I remember thinking before I pass out from the cold is that if I were to die, I would rather be a ghost than go to heaven” (294).

Ten pp.295-305

The school is littered with Solitaire Friday posters and Kent and Zelda and prefects are furious. Tori feels like the only person who could stop them. She and Michael talk about Solitaire. At dinner later with Nick and Charlie, Tori explodes at them. Tori is not doing well, and is fixated on Friday.

Eleven pp.306-315

Tori and her mom fight over not having an ironed skirt, leaving Tori with the realization that she doesn’t give a damn. Becky and Tori have a fight over their friendship. Becky thinks Tori’s breaking down. Tori goes to a new spot that’s introduced, the roof of the art conservatory. Sees a Solitaire gathering in the field where Kent’s lectern is burned.  

Twelve pp.316-322

 Tori and Michael talk in the library. He has news to share but doesn’t share it. They get into a fight and then he walks out of her life.

Thirteen pp.323-347

It’s Thursday. New posters hung up by Solitaire. Tori calls Michael. They meet up, outside on the field by the art conservatory, where Tori has brought a heater. Michael shares his news about skating. He invites her to watch him at the World Junior Speed Skating Championships. She agrees, and they get into a playful snowball fight. They chase each other, and end up back inside, and play on the swivel chairs, and then lay down under a skylight and watch it snow. Michael gives his thought of the day: “Do you think that, if we were happy for our entire lives, we would die feeling like we’d miss out on something?” (334). This is where Tori realizes he was anon this whole time. They fall asleep on the tables. Then, Tori wakes up to hear Michael and Lucas having an argument. Lucas reveals to Tori that he is Solitaire. He did it because he’s in love with her. He explains the day he saw her at school playing Solitaire on the computer, muttering how she hates herself, and how that put him into a rage, and he blamed the school. He quit after people got hurt at the Clay, but now there were too many followers, it was out of hand. He claims not to know what is coming Friday, except that they will meet at the school at 6am.

Fourteen pp.348-366

Tori calls Becky at 5 in the morning. Becky tells her to go home. She gets to school. She finds Solitaire: Evelyn Foley, Quiff Guy, and Lucas. Becky shows up for Tori. They listen in on the three, as Lucas tries to convince them to stop what they’re doing. Becky intervenes. Quiff throws a smoking bag at a classroom bookshelf. It fizzles out. It’s revealed they were trying to burn down the school. They think it’s all over, when it’s revealed that it worked, Kent’s classroom has caught fire and it is blazing. Tori is still inside, and Michael Holden shows up, throwing a fire extinguisher through a window.

Fifteen pp.367-371

She runs away from Michael, trying to find another fire extinguisher or some way to stop the fire, feeling like if she doesn’t it will all be for nothing. She finds herself on the conservatory roof. “A thousand thoughts at once. Michael Holden is nine hundred of them. The rest are self-hatred” (371).

Sixteen pp.372-382

At the edge of the roof, Tori thinks about the people in her life. Charlie appears below the school, yelling at her not to jump. Nick appears also, and other people. Michael appears, offering her a hand, trying to talk her out of killing herself. It’s revealed that Michael also wanted the school to burn, but not at this cost. He talks about how much he hates himself, and Tori says he shouldn’t. They kiss, knowing it isn’t an appropriate moment. “I think I’ve loved you since I met you” he says as we draw apart. “I just mistook it for curiosity” (379). They get out of the building, and the school burns down.

After pp. 385-390

Karl Benson: I haven’t seen you since, like, junior year. I thought you killed yourself.

Andrew Largeman: What?

Karl Benson: I thought you killed yourself. That wasn’t you?

Andrew Largeman: No, no, tha-that wasn’t me.

Garden State (2004)

Tori, Michael, Lucas, Becky, Nick and Charlie get into Nick’s car to go to the hospital. Charlie apologizes to Tori because he noticed she wasn’t well but didn’t do anything. Becky says: “I get it though. All they wanted was to make us feel like we belonged to something important. Making an impression in the world. Because, like, we’re all waiting for something to change. Patience can kill you” (389). As they all sit in the car thinking, Tori ends the novel with these reflections. “I don’t know what’s going to happen to our school and I don’t know what’s going to happen to us. I don’t know how long I’m going to be like this. All I know is that I’m here. And I’m alive. And I’m not alone” (390).

Summary

Solitaire by Alice Oseman is the story of Tori Spring, a sixteen-year-old in Year 12 at Higgs. Tori likes to blog and watch films and is introverted and struggling as things are changing around her: best friends getting interested in boys and sex and alcohol, feeling like a ghost around her classmates, and not being able to connect with old friends the same way she used to. A strange guy named Michael Holden shows up at her school and they are drawn to each other by their combined curiosity over Solitaire, a blog that has popped up and is orchestrating increasingly elaborate to downright dangerous pranks on the school. Tori starts to realize that all the pranks seem to have one thing in common: her. Solitaire explores themes of mental health, friendship, and what love looks like when it’s hard to give a damn about anything at all.

Work Cited