hmmmmmm

i think what really set me off aside from only sleeping like 4 hours during the 12 hours i was not at work for and just being deeply tired in a cumulative way was seeing this person who is 1/2 of a super sweet middle aged lesbian couple my ex and i knew and were friendly with and hearing her try to explain to someone else how we met without mentioning my ex which clearly meant that she had heard about it through her wife from my ex

feeling once again terribly heartbroken and i know it comes and goes but it feels irreparable and like another horrible piece of this break up is waiting around the corner to make it even worse. i've been going nonstop and spending time with friends but i had to go home and rest this afternoon and i wish there was someone physically present in this city who i feel deeply and comfortably connected with but the only person i had that with was her and she left me! happy pride

my mom was like relationships are hard because that's your person and you share everything with them and then it winds up feeling like they knifed you in the neck