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i want to heal but who am i if not damaged

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Anorexia Tips 1-100
Another 100 tips for you beautiful anaâs! Enjoy!
1. Always eat breakfast. Studies prove that those who eat breakfast tend to make better food choices  later in the day. You donât want to skip off a breakfast of 100 calories for a 500 calorie slice of cake at desert. Besides, breakfast gets your metabolism revved up for the day ahead.
2. If you drink a lot of water on an empty stomach it just makes you gassy. Never fun. Small sips throughout the day is better. Youâll also have to pee a lot.
3. If you have things you shouldnât (think diet pills, tape measures, thinspo, bag of spat out food, etc.) make sure you hide it. Leaving it below the bed or in your undies drawer is a surefire way to get those things found.
4. Overuse of laxitives and/or diuretics are bad for your body. Over time, abuse of laxitives and diuretics cause incontinence, and embarassment for you. And if you overuse laxitives, when you stop, your body won;t be able to have a proper bowel movement. Use them only on an as-needed basis, as defined by ânormalâ people. As in, only when constipated.
5. If you sleep less than 6 hours a day, your metabolism goes down between 10-20% depending on the person. And your body produces more of the hormone that makes you feel hungry. So even though you can burn more calories by staying up all night on the exercise bike, opt for the sleep instead if you donât want to overindulge the next day.
6. Donât deprive yourself of anything. That just leads to bingeing. If you want chocolate cake, have it, even if itâs on your list of âbad foodsâ. BUT, only have a few small bites. That way, you can enjoy what you want without ruining your diet.
7. Smaller meals throughout the day help keep your metabolism up, burning more calories.
8. Your body burns about 8 calories per glass of ice water trying to get it up to a temperature in which it can be processed. Thatâs 64 calories a day, translating to about 6 or 7 more pounds burned off in a year. Make ice your new best friend.
9. Fiber keeps you fuller longer, and helps keep your digestive system in good shape, thus reducing the need for all those laxitives.
10. Smaller dishes make it seem like you eat more. You often times eat by eyesight, not by stomach fullness. Studies have shown that in 2 groups, with the same amount of food, but one group using large plates and the other small plates, the group with the small plates reported feeling fuller.
11.Horizontal stripes and light denims make you look larger. Avoid them like the plague (Or maybe not)
12. Purging too hard can rupture your esophagus. You might die alone and in pain hunched over your toilet. Just saying.
13. If youâre having a food craving, and smoke, light up and the craving goes away. However, in a short time, that craving will return with a vengeance.
14. If you have a large binge, then your stomach expands massively, and the pressure kills off blood cells. Over time, this leads to a severely damaged stomach that may rupture. Once again, just like a ruptured esophagus, this could lead to you dying in pain.
15. The negative calorie foods actually only burn about  10% of whatever they put into you. A stick of celery at about 2 cal will only burn off 0.2 cal.
16. Purging doesnât get rid of all of the calories. You still have about 1/3 or 2/3 of those calories left in you, depending on how soon after you eat you decide to purge.
17. If you wait more than an hour to purge, then thereâs no point in doing it. Even if food comes back up, your body will have already absorbed all those calories.
18. Your body doesnât register the calories from liquid the same way as it does calories from food. Your stomach wonât send the same âstop eatingâ signals to your brain like with food.
19. A good substitute for soda is ICE Sparkling Water. It has pretty good flavor, small amounts of B Vitamins, and green tea extract, all for 0 calories.
20. Â Prolonged fasting/starvation messes up your metabolism.
21. Take a multivitamin every day. Yes, even if it has 5 calories.
22. If your body hits a plateu, a âbingeâ helps. It makes your body think that youâve stopped starving yourself. In fact, make it a goal that you have a day a week in which you eat at least 1000 calories if you want your metabolism to work properly (meaning it actually keeps burning calories and digesting food).
23. Â Blotting greasy foods like bacon and pizza with a napkin can save you about 100 calories.
24. Whole-grains have fiber and make you fuller longer.
25. Â Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
26. Alcohol is calorie dense. Say goodbye to going out drinking with friends unless you plan to be the designated driver.
27. Â If you chew and spit it out, youâre doing just as much damage to your teeth as vomiting, maybe even more, because saliva has acid like that in your stomach, that starts digestion.
28. Over time, purging depletes tooth enamel. Yes, dentists can recognize it.
29. Â If you cook pasta, donât use butter. But you get sticky pasta.
30. Â When your periods stop, osteoporosis sets in. You could be a 12 year old girl with the bones of an 80 year old woman. Sometimes, your bones never regain the proper density. Youâll become prone to stress fractures and breaking bones. Calcium supplements are gold right here. Buy the ones for elderly people with osteoporosis if you can.
31. Brushing your teeth right after purging causes the enamel to wear off, making your teeth decay faster. Chewing gum or mints releases saliva, doing the same.
32. Drinking a lot of water can make it seem that you weigh more, which can help when visiting the doctor. If a lot of liquid is consumed in a short period of time, you might cause yourself brain damage, swelling of the brain, water logging of the brainâŚ. So be careful about waterlogging.
33. Â Dehydration speeds up tooth decay, because you wonât have enough protective enzymes in your mouth to prevent the saliva from doing damage to your teeth. Donât restrict liquids.
34. Make yourself lunch. A nice big sandwich with a juice and pack of chips. Then when you get to school, give it away to someone who forgot theirs.
35. Â If you hide food that you were supposed to have eaten, make sure you do something about it ASAP. Same with the bag of puke in the closet.
36. Be prepared for all the questions of âhave you lost weightâ and âare you eatingâ.
37. You can only make the excuse of food poisoning a few times before it becomes fishy.
38. Â Laxitives donât affect calorie consumption.
39. The more that you insist that youâre fat, the more likey people are going to become suspicious.
40. Donât use thinspo with people showing bones. It raises eyebrows.
41. Denying things just makes people get more suspicious.
42. Running to the bathroom right after you eat makes people assume that youâre going to go purge.
43. Hot water fills you up more, but cold water burns  more calories.
44. Â When you go into ketosis, your breath is going to smell like hell. Mints are your buddies.
45. Â Your body often mistakes thirst for hunger.
46. Â Track progress by measuring tapes, not scales or mirrors. Your eyes will show you a hippo, even if youâre a skeleton with a skin covering, and scales get affected by everything, and I mean everything.
47. If you take too many diet pills, or even just one on an empty stomach, it gives you some pretty nasty side effects. Make sure you take one with something food. Like a few bites of an apple.
48. The artificial sweeteners like those in diet soda have been shown in studies to promote the body storing belly fat. And some have been linked to brain tumors.
49. Eating on a dark blue or black plate has the effect of making you eat less.
50. If you want to prevent a binge, just buy the food that you need for the day if you live by yourself.
51. Frozen foods take longer to eat, so you feel occupied longer, and you might feel fuller. Oh, and your body has to burn calories to get it to a temperature that it can be digested, so win all around!
52. If you get bad headaches, itâs probably because youâre dehydrated or your blood sugar is too low.
53. If you donât eat enough, your blood sugar drops, and then you start feeling weak and dizzy and get horrible headaches.
54. Donât take aspirin on an empty stomach. Itâll make you puke.
55. Â Be careful about sitting with your legs crossed, they might fall asleep and cause you pain, and if youâre thin enough, you might pinch something, leaving you in pain or unable to walk.
56. If you donât drink enough, youâll get dehydrated, and then your muscles will hurt like a bitch. And no, painkillers probably wonât do anything for this.
57. It takes about 20 minutes for your body to feel full from the time that you first put a bite of food into your mouth.
58. Some sugar free gums have 3 calories, and some have 5. Even though you arenât swallowing it, you should count these.
59. Get really good at math. That way, you can easily mentally add up whatever youâve eaten for the day, without having to write it down. People get suspicious if they come across a food diary.
60. Dress warmly enough to keep warm without making it obvious. People get suspicious if youâre wearing a coat in 90 degree weather, or complaining about being cold while theyâre ok or even too hot.
61. Spicy foods and seaweed boost the metabolism. Seaweed soup (35cal) with 1 tbsp soy sauce(10cal) and hotsauce (5cal) makes a great dinner.
62. Eating cabbage to lose weight is good, but smelly.
63. Eating in front of the TV or computer distracts you from feeling full.
64. Eat while standing burns more calories than eating while sitting.
65. Talk a lot and eat very little at lunch or dinner and people wonât notice.
66. Keep food spread out and close to the plate and people will think itâs more.
67. Your skin will turn gray or yellow if you donât eat right. Tanning might help counteract this.
68. Your hair will get super dry and maybe even turn gray in places. Have extra strength conditioner and hair dye on call.
69. Your nailbeds are going to get blue from lack of nutrients. Find a pretty color nailpolish that you like.
70. Every 20 minutes or so when sitting, get up and take a short walk if you can.
71. Delete your browsing history. Itâs hard to explain away your sudden weight loss when thereâs all the pro ana tricks in your computer.
72. Weight lost slowly will stay off, whereas weight that is lost rapidly will come back, with more, when you start eating even somewhat normal.
73. If you lose weight too fast, you also lose muscle. When that happens, you burn off calories more slowly.
74. People with more muscle burn off more calories doing the same activities as people with less muscle.
75. Â If you burn off too much muscle, then your body burns calories more slowly.
76. Only eat when people are going to notice. And then, only have something small.
77. Excuses will be your new best friend. Use them like a cheap whore.
78. Lack of nutrients make you depressed.
79. Fasting for days on end makes your metabolism go down and increases cravings.
80. Break your exercise up into smaller 5-15 minute blocks. Itâs easier to stomach that way.
81. Itâs not so hard to put some exercise into your daily life. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, walk to nearby locations instead of driving, clean your houseâŚ
82. If you keep doing the same exercise day in and day out, your body will get used to it.
83. If you keep consuming the same number of calories per day, your body gets used to that too. Your metabolism goes down.
84. Coffee on an empty stomach makes you nauseous.
85. Diet pills can sometimes give you heart damage if you use too many or for too long.
86. Losing too much weight too fast might cause organ damage, especially to your heart, since in effect, your heart is just one big muscle.
87. Splenda with fiber is better than sweetener or fiber by itself. Add it to everything you need to make sweeter and you will get more fiber too.
88. Your body takes a long time to digest protein. So eat fish, it leaves a smell behind to make people think youâre eating.
89. Dish out food for yourself, then feed it to the dog below the table. Be careful though because if you feed your dog the wrong thing, you might make him sick.
90. Â Heat up food in the microwave and leave the door open. It makes everything smell. Double points if it splatters all over the inside.
91. Leave dirty dishes in the sink or dishwasher or on the counter.
92. Take food in a bowl from the kitchen, eat some of it at the dining room table, then act like youâre going back for more. Dump most of the food back into the pot, and leave only a few bites behind. Go back and eat those at the table.
93. Cook often for people. They usually assume that you ate some in the kitchen while you were making it.
94. When you cook, just the act of seeing so much food and smelling it is often enough to fill you up.
95. Â Remember that if you eat too much youâll become fat. They donât make cute clothes for fat people.
96. When sitting, maintain good posture. It burns more calories.
97. Black pepper makes your heart rate go up in case they think your blood pressure is too low. Be careful about the difference between sitting BP and standing BP though.
98. Get yourself a pair of jeans that are at a size or two smaller than what you are. Make it your goal to get into them. Even if the size thatâs smaller than you is in the kids sizes.
99. Improper diet often leads to insomnia. Take up a hobby for when youâre unable to sleep, or when youâre craving.
100. Better yet, get sleeping pills.
Is it bad that these seems like regular health tips to me at this point âŚ.
Do it for the..
âYou got skinny!â
âWow I can fit my hand all the way around your wristâ
Jealous stares
Size XXS and 00
âYou can sit on my lap since youâre obviously the lightestâ
Beautiful in anything
âYouâre so light!â
âIâll give you a piggyback rideâ
Confidence in dressing rooms
Bikini body
Dainty wrists
Hip bones
Collarbones that dip for days
Slender legs
Thigh gaps
âYou look like a model!â
âHow did you do it?â
ability to feel confident in your own skin
Stop.
Stop thinking of time in days or weeks. Think of it in hours, or minutes even.Â
Donât tell yourself that âYouâve already ruined today anyway, so what that point?â
Youâve only âruinedâ this hour, this minute. You can still succeed in the next hour.Â
So donât give up and start tomorrow for the millionth time, start again the next minute. Start again the next hour, and keep fucking going.
This helped me stop binging

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Youâve wanted a flat stomach forever. Youâve wanted to binge for 10 minutes. Your choice.
itâs always cold and my skin is pale,
and my worth is measured
by falling numbers on a scale,
and cucumber with salt and what is water retention?
and why is it so cold in here?
my familyâs choosing not to mention
the clothes than hang loose from my diminishing frame
and no iâm not hungry, and yes iâm doing okay,
but when i stand up thereâs black spots clouding my vision
and yes this is hard
but itâs not a decision,
the illusion of control has taken me hostage, alone
and now i seek comfort from the feel of my bones.
waking up to stars on the ceiling and bruises on pale skin and battered feet on & off the scale and almonds in ziploc baggies and bite marks on fingers and hair down the drain and measuring crunches by the spots left on the spine and enough water to drown organs and eating an apple with a knife and fork and battered feet on & off the scale and desperate hands clutching ribs and standing up & the world goes dark and carrying an emergency rice cake in your purse for weak spells and enough green tea to drown organs and how many calories are in toothpaste and whatever nail polish color covers yellow and battered feet on & off the scale and is today the day my heart gives out and how many calories do you burn when you sneeze and pillows squeezed between thighs and waking up in a new body everyday and fingers clasped around wrists and notebooks filled with numbers and purple crescents below the eyes and accidentally knocking your elbow on your hip bone and being afraid of your own reflection and iâm not hungry or i already ate or iâll eat later or i donât feel well and oxygen that tastes like splenda and battered feet on & off the scale
control
CONTROL
CONTROL
CONTROL
CONTROL
control
control
control
control
control
everything else in my life is chaos. my body and the food i put in it is all i can control. my head hurts and my ears are ringing and iâm cold and tired but i will not stop. this control is all i have.
difference in a little less than a month
motivation

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anti-binge guide
when you feel a craving coming on:
drink a glass or two of water, slowly
have a piece of fruit, like an apple
make some warm herbal tea with natural sweetener
go for a long walk or hike, put your earphones in and clear your head - walk with a friend if youâd prefer
if youâre still craving the food, have the tiniest bit of it, no more than a bite, and have another glass of water
distractions:
watch a long movie or start a new show
study! complete homework or begin revising for exams
write down your own thinspo imagines
do some online window shopping and look at all the outfits you want to wear at a smaller size
make your own thinspo playlist
do some yoga or meditation
things to keep in mind:
you already know what your favourite foods taste like - you donât need to eat them again in bulk
imagine the amount of progress youâll make tomorrow if you exercise self control right now
the shame and guilt that follows a binge is not worth it
the physical pain and exhaustion is not worth it
youâre not just affecting your weight, youâre affecting your overall health, your mental well-being, your skin
binging means youâre wasting your time when you could be doing something much more productive
can i have this tattooed on my brain stem
âď¸âď¸
hi guys
i havenât been active for a while now, but iâm back. iâm really struggling atm and i just want to starve until i disappear, but i donât have the control. i just need the control.
Anorexia is
pretending that you already ate and are still full all the time
working out to burn calories and not to better your mental state
loving the euphoria of an empty stomach, when cold water hits it, when it cries for food and you just ignore it
the pride of not eating for days straight, the satisfaction of your control
pretending to like black coffee because you donât want to drink calories, until you actually like it
drinking tea religiously because you need to fasten your metabolism
counting everything, calories, steps, days, pounds lost, bottles of water
taking freezing showers to burn more calories
going out with friends and pretending that you feel sick to avoid food
looking up nutrition guides of restaurants to find the lowest calorie meal before going out
taking vitamins as if it can make up for all the nutrients you arenât getting
weighing everything, yourself every day, all of your food, even your lettuce
overestimating calories you eat and underestimating calories you burn
looking for photos of thinspo to make yourself feel worse as motivation
pushing people away so they donât notice what you are doing
being proud of being cold on a hot day
body checks every time you walk past a mirror
getting light headed when you stand up, feeling your heart race and wondering if youâll pass out
progress photos, measuring body parts, on the scale, off the scale
comparing yourself to everyone
looking up low calorie meals only to find that they arenât low enough, and choosing to eat air, again
wearing baggy clothes to hide your body because you hate it
looking at clothes you will buy when you get skinny
purple nails and hot baths that never make you warm enough
either having a mental breakdown because you gained weight or feeling so high because you lost some
working out to the point of exhaustion because you need progress
promising yourself youâll stop once you get to where you want to
not believing you are sick or need help because you donât look it, yet
a fucked up disease that you hate and love all at once
Guilty pleasures
- getting bruised easily - feeling my bones popping out - looking pale - getting cold easily - feeling lightheaded when standing up too fast - when people are concerned by how much weight I lost - my stomach rumbling - missing my period
(Add on)
I made myself FAT
I can make myself SKINNY
I made myself FAT
I can make myself SKINNY
I made myself FAT
I can make myself SKINNY
I made myself FAT
I can make myself SKINNY

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Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
being depressed and anorexic like
Canât wait
Canât wait till ripped jeans look good on me and my fat isnât poking through
Canât wait till my ribs show when I breathe
Canât wait to wear crop tops
Canât wait to get jealous stares
Canât wait to be the skinny friend
Canât wait to have to get an extra small in shirts or a 00 in jeans
Canât wait to have my shoes look bigger than my legs
Canât wait for people to talk about my weight loss behind my back
Canât wait to feel sexy
Canât wait to not have to wear a shirt during sex
Canât wait to love to go shopping
Canât wait to change my style
I canât wait.
(Add more if you can think of any)
Canât wait until Iâm not afraid to ask my friends for piggy back rides
Canât wait until he can dip me backwards easily while dancing
Canât wait until my legs look thinner and longer and daintier
Canât wait until I can fit into an extra-small