1) for people confused about the “I’ve known her since I was born (…) she’s always been family”: She’s the granddaughter of our parents’ neighbors, we all grew up together and my brother and her have been in love since they were babies. He held her hand as she made her first steps, they even have a picture on their wall of the moment before she first tried to get up

That said, they still hosted a gigantic party with friends and both families with like 100 people and a good 100 bottles of champagne & 100 more of wine (we’re French, don’t judge us). A lot of food, too. And a lot of food means a lot of napkins. And a lot of napkins means I could spend the entire night writing down my phone number on them and keep obnoxiously slipping them into the bride’s hands, pockets, plate, glass, collar etc while mouthing “call me” and doing the phone hand-motion. Which she obnoxiously answered with a fake-fanning hand motion and a wink every time, btw. My own Mother slipped her a napkin on my behalf at one point, too. My brother ripped every single napkins in half. After roughly 18 times of what was probably the most annoying running gag of all time, my brother finally decided to put me in a headlock.

Anyway, these two are still disgustingly, infuriatingly, madly in love, everyone was piss drunk and we all lived happily ever after,

My idiot brother is gonna be a whole ass PARENT. AN ENTIRE DAD. And I’m gonna be an AUNT (again, for the millionth time. We have a very big family, don’t even ask)

I, of course, already love that peach-stone sized future human being more than I ever loved anything in my entire life, and I am ready to fulfill my new destiny: to be the best weird and fun gay aunt who’s always travelling and only comes home to get drunk at family gatherings.

The new and improved plan is to get that kid on the “you married the wrong sibling” family running joke. I want the kid to tell me “I wish you were my Dad” by the time they’re 15. Their Mom is already on board, as is my own Mother. My brother not so much, but who cares about him anyway.

In all seriousness, I’m absolutely thrilled for my Brother and my Sister-in-Law. They’ve loved each other so fiercely and for so long, I couldn’t be happier to see them expand their own little family by bringing a whole entirely new human being into it. I know my brother, he has always wanted a kid for as long as I can remember. His happiness is all that matters to me. And BOY, is he happy! I love my family with my entire heart and soul, and I can’t wait to watch this little nugget grow up.