2CurlyVegans

Georgetown, the capital of the island Penang, is named after the British King George III. The city is located at the northeast side of the island and has, suburbs included, about 550.000 inhabitants. After Penang was handed over by the sultan of Kedah to the English, Sir Francis Light founded the city Georgetown. He immediately started the construction of Fort Cornwallis. Over the years this first settlement evolved into a big city (in that time). In 1957 Georgetown got permission to be called a city and until 1972 it was the only city in Malaysia with this permission. In 2008 UNESCO listed Georgetown as World Heritage Site because of the many original colonial (Chinese style) shophouses.

Penang is a city island just off the mainland- It was our first stop when we arrived. But, before we properly explored the wonders of the city, we took a three hour boat trip north to Langkawi for a few days (please read last post).

What can I say about Penang? It’s a pretty cool place. We stayed in a premier inn/Travelodge style hotel called Ink Hotel in Georgetown. Hotel costs around £15 per night which I thought was very good value in terms of comfort and location (and situated in Siam Jalan! That translates to Thai Street! Haha we’ve just been there – not that funny I know). Staff were truly amazing though! Very helpful and if they didn’t know the answers to my awkward questions like “Where is the nearest and nicest beach? Is there a gym in the area? Where can we find vegan food?” They would make the effort to research whilst we were out and about or sleeping. Answers would be on a post-it note for us the next morning.  Apart from the beach – all were pretty close proximity to each other. We were lucky to have had a choice of three Chinese Vegetarian restaurants (or should I say Restorans…this is how they spell it) very close by so we were spoilt for choice.

Batu Ferringhi is supposed to be the closest and best beach in Penang. When we got there, we were a little disappointed. Although it was white sand and a long stretch of beach, the sea water was brown and looked rather dirty. There were not many people on the beach, but it was okay to see it once. We were told the beach is home to a lot of jelly fish, and the scaredy that I am, I didn’t even dip my toe in there.  We only stayed for a couple of hours, took a cab and headed back into town.

Taxis drivers (or should I say Teksi drivers…what a cool way of spelling it) are extremely educated and knowledgeable. Firstly, they speak very good English- I would say better than my cockney rhyming slag and better than most of my friends back home. One of the teksi drivers use to work as an engineer for Malaysian airlines. After 18 years with the company, he decided to hang up his wings, take voluntary redundancy and give taxi driving a go. Mainly because he can work at his own pace and have more time for his family.   We were once stuck in traffic for over an hour and I must it was one of the most fascinating taxi rides I’ve had. We learnt a lot about Penang- it was historically a hub for trading (back in the 14th century) and 25 years ago it was a tourist hotspot. However, thanks to the rapid development of hotels, apartments, increase levels of pollution and the 2004 Tsunami-this has affected beach areas (I guess that explains the colour of the sea water). He also gave us great advice where to go.

Penang, especially Georgetown has a lot of history- many of the areas are very colonial (previously ruled by the Dutch, British and Portuguese). Some of the buildings are really quirky, painted with different colours- very much like Trinidad in Cuba. In fact, at times, I felt like I was in Cuba. What also makes this place charming is the street art. Walking along some of back streets we spotted a few delightful wall paintings (please refer to the pictures). Penang is also the land of shopping malls! They are literally everywhere- one area there were three malls right next to each other. So, you can imagine we had to spend a few afternoons window shopping (poor OK). Another evening, we went to the cinema to watch the James Bond Spectre (I must admit watching the movie gave me a great sense of security because it felt like I was back home). What made the movie more enjoyable was the cost- drum roll please…£1.50 each!!

Never go to Penang without giving Penang Hill a visit unless you’re an inpatient person. We queued up for an hour before entering an overcrowded (but air conditioned) funicular. The ride up the mountain was about 15 minutes. Once we reached the top, you see a huge amount of people, (perhaps double in size) waiting for the funicular to go back down.

The view from the hill was amazing though and we took a few pictures. But after five minutes, I got a little bored and wanted to head back down to the shopping malls LOL. But no, we waited so long; we needed to make this trip worthwhile. So, we walked around and happy we stayed because we visited a gorgeous Hindu temple.  There were also few small spots to chill and people watch. The way down was a pain in the ass though! We queued for over an hour and half and I was desperate for the loo too!

Little India!! Oh my goodness what a place this is! We were lucky to be around during Diwali (Festival of Lights) and this place was buzzing. The area is filled with sari/jewellery shops, a street market and loads of restaurants. And guess what? A vegan haven! Here is where we ate so well and gained a few pounds. We also found a bakery store selling homemade vegan Red Velvet, Carrot, Coffee cakes and brownies! It was gluttonous.

Langkawi Sky Bridge is a 125 meters curved pedestrian cable-stayed bridge, located at the peak of Gunung Mat Chinchang mountain, on Pulau Langkawi, an island in the Langkawi archipelago in Kedah, Malaysia.

After 13 hours on the second class sleeper train, we got our Thai exit stamp and crossed the border into Malaysia. We headed to the island of Penang via Butterworth (mainland). There are two ways to cross over and that’s either crossing one of two bridges or taking the ferry. Ferry journey takes approximately 20 minutes and costs about 40p per person. However, I’ll be writing more about Penang on a separate post.

Firstly, what a great start to our four night stay in Langkawi. We hired a moped- one with an almost empty tank.  And guess what? On our way to the closest petrol station which was about two kilometres away, the moped decided it cannot go any further! Yes it stopped in the middle of what looked like a dual carriage way. I had to walk ahead in the middle of the road while OK was behind pushing the thing and cursing till the cows came home. Don’t ask me why, but I found the situation quite amusing at the time- only because we looked like two foreign bell-ends…OK clearly didn’t find any of this funny at all.

OK took the lead and booked a night at the TStar Cottage costing us £12 GBP per night (trust him to find the cheapest accommodation on Trivago). We were given keys to a small hut in the middle of a jungle. Rather charming looking hut from the outside, but once you enter is very tiny and very basic. If you wanted toilet paper, extra pillows, a mosquito net, hair dryer etc. you had to pay extra. Oh! And all rooms had no hot showers.

There were signs all over the resort with “Do not feed the monkeys” and pictures on what the friendly monkeys look like versus the naughty monkeys. It was an uncomfortable night’s sleep because mosquitos were gate-crashing our sleepover. There were also weird noises outside our door so I suspected they were the naughty monkeys which didn’t bother me that much. Nevertheless, we changed hotel the next day.

We had another incident with our moped…OK decided not to wear a helmet as it didn’t look cool enough. And guess what? We were stopped by police on motorcycles and they issued OK with an on-the-spot fine of about £100 GBP. He tried sweet talking them by saying “We’re students, we don’t have money. In my country you only use helmets at your own discretion” – twenty minutes have gone by and I was rather impressed by OK’s persuasive skills. I made sure I kept my mouth firmly shut (who knows what kind of damage I would have caused). Finally, they let us go with a verbal warning and a picture – thankfully.

We didn’t get to do much beaching as there weren’t many beaches that were suitable – I say unsuitable because the tides are always low. Cenang is where the tourists go and the beach is pretty decent- quite small and the usual jet skis and water surfing on offer. But we stayed approximately 25 minutes north pass the airport in a town called Pantai. Here we met a German gentleman who gave us advice on local activities (which were very limited) and told us it will be a challenge to find anything at least vegetarian (so that’s Roti and white rice for the next few days). This man (who I forgotten his name) is retired, single, no children- he decided to leave his life in Germany to live and travel in Asia. He spends most of his days sitting in the front patio of the guesthouse with a book in one hand and a glass (which I assumed was a glass of either rum or whisky) in another. Although, that wouldn’t be my idea of fun, he seemed to be truly happy and content. He would say things like how great it was not to have any responsibilities and loves to feel free! But what drew my attention the most was that he managed to rent a room for £50 per month- How cheap is that? So what is there to do in Langkawi? Well, we took the moped for a spin and headed to the cable car and the infamous sky bridge with is located above the Oriental Village. Along the way we spotted a family of monkeys chilling on the road. We stopped to take a few pictures, particularly one which was rummaging through a garbage can. We went really close and all of a sudden the little guy came at us. We skidded off as quickly as possible – although he was little, he looked mad! Of course I didn’t want to run the risk of getting bitten.

The Oriental Village is purely catered for tourists. It’s filled with souvenir shops, fun activities for children and an exhibition centre. The queues for the cable car and Sky Bridge were incredibly long and waiting time was almost two hours! However, you can pay a little extra for the fast lane. We met a funny cartoonist who was selling funky caricatures! This dude use to work for the Disney Channel Malaysia as a cartoon voice over person (sorry I don’t know what this is actually called). So you can imagine how entertained I was when he was doing all my favourite Disney character impressions- I could have easily spent hours and hours speaking to him- Donald Duck was my fav!

We took the opportunity to drive further north of the island to find a waterfall. We got a little lost along the way but the trip was well worth it! The freshwater was at perfect temperature and it wasn’t crowded at all. There were a few local young boys who dared each other to jump from the highest rock. One boy climbed dangerously high (about 20 meters high and water isn’t that deep), it took him about 40 minutes to jump- luckily he didn’t hurt himself when his whole body smacked into the water. He had a massive round of applause when his head popped to the surface- brave but silly. I should have obeyed the rules of not feeding the monkeys though! I couldn’t help myself by giving one of the naughty monkeys my banana peel. One of his fellow monkey mates got a little offended I didn’t give him any and started running after me!! I was screaming, people were looking and OK desperately trying to calm me down. I’ve never felt so scared (apart from the recent bumpy flight) in a long time.

This is a very special post as its being co-written (or rather bullied into) by my childhood bestie Hasena.

After a somewhat bumpy and slightly hazy flight, we finally landed in the beautiful Indonesian island of Bali. As expected, as soon as you exit the airport, we were confronted by a whole host of uniformed taxi drivers.

Our driver although a friendly chatty chap, didn’t seem to know where he was going and had to ask numerous times what the name of our hotel was and asked the locals for directions. When we finally reached our destination, we learnt that the Nusa Puri hotel that we were looking for had changed its name to VOUK (and was called something else before that- so the name had changed three times in the space of two months). It was a beautiful place and we appeared to have the huge hotel resort to ourselves. If you ever go to Nusa Puri/VOUK/Mantra or whatever its name is gonna be, do try their Gabo Gabo which is a traditional Indonesian delicacy made with fresh vegetables, tofu, nut cake and a drizzle of spicy peanut sauce.

The local beach “Geger beach” was only a five minute drive away and we were escorted by the hotel tuk tuk. Hasena had the desperate urge for a massage and made friends with one the local beach masseuse. This masseuse kept coming back persuading not only Hasena (who always gave in!) but to also me and OK. Their tactic was to rub your feet and won’t stop until you give them a firm NO. Trust me, after the amount of walking we all did in KL and Singapore, a foot massage is definitely what the doctor would order. It was one of those “Yes, please carry on, no don’t I don’t want this, please stop, don’t stop…ahhhhh!” moments. After a couple of massage sessions, Hasena realised she was being ripped off as four local lady friends were charging 100,000 IDR (£5 GBP) instead of 60,000 IDR (£3 GBP) which is the market rate.

One thing we loved about Indonesia is their currency, because we always felt like millionaires. Their notes had extremely high denominations. We’d change £100 GBP at the Bureau de Change and was given $2M IDR. Hasena had to take a picture and send it to her family with the post “I’ve made it!”– We’re RICH, beyond our wildest dreams ;o)

Apart from the ever so rowdy Kuta (which was also the place where the devastating bombings occurred), Seminyak is the place to be in Bali. It’s a buzzing location filled with bars, restaurants and shops. This place was about a 30 minute drive away (which is about £5 GBP with a taxi). We spent many evenings there, mainly for dinner because we discovered an organic earthy restaurant called Earth Café. The restaurant also had a grocery section similar to Planet Organic in the UK but at the fraction of the cost so we bulked up with things to take home.  

Bali isn’t all just about paradise beaches, which is why we wanted to venture out. So we hired a driver called Made to show us what Bali is all about. He took us to Silver and Gold smiths, where Hasena and I would dribble over the precious stones and magnificent bespoke Indonesian designs and OK would sit in the corner keeping on a DL and play Backgammon on his phone hoping I wouldn’t drop hints on a certain piece of jewel I’d wish he would buy me ;o) Next stop was the Coffee and Cacao plantation and I kid you not, this place was absolute heaven for Hasena. After banishing her from any kind of coffee intake during her visit, she got away with experiencing different kinds of coffee in the name of culture- she was in total Euphoria (rolled eyes and all). However, one type of coffee she didn’t want to sample was the Luwak (Pea Berry) Coffee- which is supposed to be the most expensive coffee in the world as it is produced by an animal (looks a bit like a fox) pooping out the coffee bean, which is then roasted and grounded. I however needed to give this coffee a good go and for 50K IDR (£2.50 GBP) per cup, why not try a bit of shit once in your life…tastes like normal coffee though probably more nutritious.

You must go to Ubud because here is the home of Tampak Siring which is a holy water temple. Hasena heard that if you bathed under all circa twenty holy springs, it would enhance your beauty, health and wealth. So, we were all over this and made sure we bathed hard- the ritual was to wash your face three times, wash your mouth out three times, sip the water three times, and then wash your hair. There was an Indonesian school trip, where some of the students found us particularly fascinating and consistently took pictures of us and giggling as well.  

We discovered Made (our driver) was a yoga instructor and we requested he’d take us to his master who he kept banging on about- he told us the master had healing powers and the ability to read minds. But firstly, let’s rewind a little bit to explain why we were so eager to pay him a visit. As we were in a predominately Hindu region, we exposed to lots of information on Hindu related spiritual stuff for example Ayurveda, Chakra and the third eye. So, we hope a small visit to the master’s house would put our curiosity at rest. The next morning we woke up earlier than usual (6am) and drove three hours through steep mountainous roads and beautiful views of rice fields. We had to make a few stops along the way, as I have a very weak bladder. One of the toilet stops was a rather appealing one (I’m being sarcastic here)- as you’d probably imagine, it was a small room filled with all sorts of bugs and a hole in the floor. I had to go first as I was literally bursting and Hasena was contemplating being one with nature and do her business behind a banana tree-  but like a lady, she waited patiently. Unlucky, the toilet door was broken so OK took the job of holding it closed while I was in there. I took a little longer than normal having downed a huge coconut earlier and OK wasn’t making my experience in there anymore pleasant by yelling “What you doing in there? Hurry up!” me “Yes OK, you’re acting like I really want to be in here!!”.

A short nap in our tour bus later, we arrived at the master’s house. But first, we had to cross a river by foot! This meant getting a little wet- while OK and I sped through it, poor Hasena was strategically escorted hand-in-hand by Made (what a gentleman). This journey reminded me a lot of the film “Wizard of Oz” - Dorothy and her pals embarked on a journey to visit the wizard who lived miles away and had to encounter many inconveniences along the way. This journey is definitely one to tell the kids…The Master’s house was pretty run down in the middle of nowhere and we caught a naked man bathing in the river (literally washing his bum out). We were greeted by a host of people (who also took pictures of us) and the master who I imagined would be an old tanned, long white bearded skinny man with a turban. But he turned out to be a rather young, out of shape, casual kind of guy- I was a little disappointed (I should never stereotype). He was sitting in a school teacher type of desk with a white board near him- seemed he was giving a lecture. We felt slightly awkward because we interrupted his session and he didn’t get up to shake our hand- we also had to communicate with him through Made. I have to admit, I felt pretty nervous around him because I couldn’t help think that he knew exactly what I was thinking. For some reason all his attention was drawn towards me which made me feel even more nervous. He lectured us about yoga and why it’s is important, he asked us questions around our beliefs. He then offered to perform a ritual that he referred to as a blessing- I politely declined and Hasena politely fell asleep. I had to knock her a couple of times as her snoring was getting louder and louder- you can’t take her anywhere! He seemed pretty offended we didn’t take up on this offer, but it definitely wasn’t a wasted journey.

The first Full Moon Party was improvised at a Paradise Bungalows on the beach in 1985, for giving thanks to about 20–30 travellers. The parties gained fame through word of mouth, and the event now draws a crowd of about 5,000–30,000 every full moon evening. The party carries on until the sun rises the next day. The bars on the sunrise beach of Haad Rin town stay open and play music such as psychedelic trance, R&B, DnB, house, dance and reggae. The modern event has become a part of the itinerary of many travellers to Southeast Asia.

My third visit to this Island- The last two times I was here was for one reason only…FULL MOON PARTY! This time my visit was for a completely difference reason- we wanted to relax and retreat. Funnily enough, we were actually here during the full moon shindig (Trust me, I was tempted to make an appearance, get my glow in the dark body paint on and get my hands on to those buckets. But as the weatherman predicted, it pissed it down). Also after the age of 30, full moon parties aren’t so appealing anymore.

We were staying about 12 km from the party and this other side of Koh Phangan is filled with hippies, yogists and jungle…a lot of JUNGLE. Our guesthouse was a little different from the other places we’ve stayed in. It was an “environmentally ethical” house called Baan Jai Dee. This place is located on a hill overlooking the bay about 10 minutes away from Thong Sala Pier. One of the reasons why they were “ethical” was because they had a fresh water swimming pool.

They had a big friendly dog called Dam (Thai for Black)- he would often come into our room for a nap- so cute :o) This place was absolute bliss and so far my favourite hotel of the whole trip.

First day, we had a go at taking the kayak for a spin- well more like taking a short but hard (physically that is) trip to a remote sand island across the bay- it was beautiful…until later…I had a rather small but more controlled panic attack on the kayak on our way back. Only because I saw dark clouds slowly heading our way (if you have a look at one of the pictures of me on the sand island, you’ll see the skies are not fully clear, there’s some dark- I feel there’s gonna be a storm…). It takes OK about twenty minutes to row us back (I just don’t have the strength to row and all I did was hold us back- so best to keep my sticks in- I promise, I’m not a princess). Thankfully we made it back just in time because as soon we stepped foot in our room, there were non-stop thunder and lightning till the following day.

Goodness, I’m such a nervous wreck…the next morning, the sun came out, and I did a few laps in the pool, chilled out and listen to music. I took one look at my left leg and there were small dots (not many) scattered all over and the same on my right leg. I knew very well they weren’t mosquito bites and they were not itchy. “It’s a rash!! Looks like a rash! Oh my God, I’m feeling dizzy! What’s happening to me?” OK told me to relax, but as I am a girl who is incapable of maintaining composure, I ran over to the landlady who barely spoke English and asked her what’s happened to me…with a mixture of basic English, some Thai and hand gestures- I guess she asked what I’ve eaten, where did I go. In the end we realised these were bites from sandflies and they come out more often during the rainy season (blood sucking f$%~ers!). The landlady was so sweet and gave me a tub of her tiger balm which apparently reduces swelling in a day. Now tiger balm has automatically become one of my main components in my handbag- this stuff is so good!

Koh Phangan is the place where I tried out Muay Thai boxing and it’s a great way to stay in shape because you pretty much exercise all areas of your body- it enhances flexibility and you sweat bucket loads. Can I mention how impressed the teacher was with me? Apparently I was better than OK (in terms of getting the sequences perfectly). OK wasn’t too please about this and for the rest of the day, we had on/off discussions on who was the better boxer – friendly/couple competition is okay right?

Food glorious food!! Yes Phangan is a vegan haven! Baan Jai Dee not only had a guesthouse but if you take a trip to Pantai market (about 5 minutes on the moped), they have a veggie stall serving delicious food! The dishes I recommend are the Burrito and the Spinach and Potato (made in a special sauce).  If you head further north, you’ll eventually come to a place called CHOCOLATE and seriously I’ve never tasted dark chocolate like this before. This place is run by a hippy looking lady (with a transatlantic accent) who is also a tattoo artist and she hand makes the chocolate (cocoa is imported from Indonesia). The chocolate bars were a little expensive (200 baht - £4 GBP) – we had to go back for seconds because it was so yummers. Not far from the chocolate place is a small hippy village called Srithanu- here is a gluten free/vegan/some raw food restaurant called Karma Café. Please please please try their beetroot burger and their chocolate brownie and coconut ice cream sundae – oh my days I was in heaven!!!

During our week here, we experienced a few black outs! This meant no INTERNET!! Like anyone in the UK noticed I was offline for several hours LOL! But yeah! One evening we were having dinner at a night market and all of a sudden everything stopped working and it was pitched black. Dogs started barking, people woof whistling and phones were being used as torches. There is no power for about 12 hours.

“Ko Samui, one of Thailand’s largest islands in the Gulf of Thailand, is known for its palm-fringed beaches circling coconut groves and dense, mountainous rainforest. It’s also home to luxury resorts, posh spas and a rowdy nightlife scene that often attracts a backpacker crowd.”

Apologies in advanced but this post is gonna be a short one! This is thanks to the amazing weather we had whilst being here (I’m being sarcastic by the way).

4 hours on the road followed by 45 minutes boat trip and we arrived in the party island of Samui!

We were supposed to freestyle here but after the experience in Ao Nang- I made sure somewhere was booked in advanced. We stayed at the Samui Palm beach resort in Bo Phut – Northern Samui. Although sea water was satisfactory this part of the island, the sand wasn’t pleasant to walk on at all- it was really grainy (as in each grain of sand was big – am I making any sense here?), your feet sinks into the ground with each step you take so walking along the beach was a real struggle.

Hotel is a 10 minute walk to the Fisherman’s Village and about 15 minute drive to Chaweng (where it’s all happening). We only paid Chaweng a visit once- we’re right party animals aren’t we? We went to a tiki bar that evening (on a Saturday night) and we got the weirdest look from our tipsy barman (I swear he had a cheeky line just before serving us- he seemed oddly wired and extremely confident and talkative), when we asked for two fresh coconut waters- ROCK ON! We also had to drink them quickly as we didn’t want to miss the shuttle bus back to the hotel (hey! we want to wake up early so we don’t miss breakfast).

First night in Samui we walked along the Fisherman’s Village which is a pretty cool place and we were lucky there was a big night market. One stall was selling a selection of BBQ insects by the bag (30 baht – 60p if you wish to try one)- No thank you! However, we found a few Thai vegan treats; Potato Balls made out of potato (obviously), Tapioca Flour (starch extracted from cassava root), sugar, salt and coconut milk. These are deep fried (fantastic when you’re on a diet)- they taste a bit like a doughnut or a light version of Caribbean fried dumplings. We also discovered Thai (“Cornish”) pasties- fillings include either Taro, pineapple, soy bean or corn- delightful fatty treats!

OMG it rained every bloody day mate! I was only able to lie on the beach for a couple of hours the whole time I was here. Then I was told by the hotel receptionist that we are in the middle of the rainy season!!! Clearly someone didn’t do their research before booking these flights – DOH!!

The Beach is a 2000 adventure drama film directed by Danny Boyle and based on the 1996 novel of the same name by Alex Garland, which was adapted for the film by John Hodge. The film stars Leonardo DiCaprio and features Tilda Swinton, Robert Carlyle, Virginie Ledoyen, Guillaume Canet, and Paterson Joseph. It was filmed on the Thai island Koh Phi Phi.

Four hours later, we arrived in Phi Phi Island for a day trip. As soon as the ferry docked and you step foot on the jetty, you have to pay 20 baht island tax to enter. 20 baht is not much (40p GBP) but it’s a little cheeky the tour operators didn’t reveal this tiny information…Another but major detail they didn’t make us aware was the storing of our luggage- and we so called backpackers don’t travel light… One massive suitcase, a smaller one, a huge backpackers racksack and a normal size backpack – Now, question is, where do we store our stuff whilst enjoying the island? “Let’s go to one of these run down tour excursion stalls, nicely ask if we can leave our luggage here for a couple of hours, give them 50 baht and Bob’s your uncle!”. I’m not gonna lie, I was a little apprehensive leaving my unlocked stuff there- especially when they gladly accepted to keep an eye on them with no hesitation.

Phi Phi is divided into two islands Phi Phi Don and Phi Phi Lay. Phi Phi Lay is home to Maya Bay where that movie The Beach starring Leonardo Di Caprio was filmed. Unfortunately we arrived in Don – my mistake I forgotten where the filming was exactly. I’ve been there before and it’s a beautiful bay but filled with tourists so this made it not so spectacular and I don’t think OK was missing much - oops!

So we had a few hours to kill before heading to the main land to Ao Nang. And what great ways to past the time on this tropical island- hire a kayak! I’ve done rowing in the gym and in Battersea Park but kayaking is hard work! Fortunate for me, OK treated this past time as a gym session so he did all the work and I just relaxed myself on the front admiring the view. Until he rowed very close to a cave and I totally freaked out “No, I don’t want you to row into the cave, haven’t you watched that 90’s show 999? Accidents happen and this cliff is really big!” Yes I had a mini panic attack.

We had to head back to the pier to catch the boat to Ao Nang. Once we got back to that tour office, all our stuff was gone!! Only joking! Our stuff was being looked after by a cute fuzzy cat (see picture).

Our plan was to stay in Ao Nang for three nights and we wanted to freestyle (as in find hotels once we arrive). But, I just need to have something in place once I touch down cos I don’t like the idea walking all evening finding a place to sleep. So a few days prior to our arrival, I booked one night at the Ao Nang Buri Resort which is located between Nopparattara and Ao Nang beach- that’ll surely give us enough time to find a hotel for the reminder two nights. We walked past a sign outside a massage parlour saying “ROOM FOR RENT 300 BAHT PER NIGHT” that’s £6 GBP per night- how cheap is that? I instantly had a bad feeling about this but OK was proper keen so I requested we take a look. The owner took us into the massage parlour, past the massage beds, towards the back of the shop and went into a room which looked like a rundown prison cell- no window, a small portable fan, two single mattresses and no bed sheets- I wanted to cry! OK said “Not bad, looks okay- but where’s the bathroom?” the SHARED bathroom was located further at the back of the shop; I didn’t even want to go there as I’ve already made my mind up! But OK wanted to have a look either way and still thought it would be good to stay here! This is where Caprichiosa comes out “Absolutely no way man- we are staying at the resort!”.

Not much goes on in Nopparattara – Ao Nang is where it’s at, filled with restaurants, bars- it was a mini Bangkok. It’s here where I discovered how much Thai people love Bob Marley. There are quite a few reggae bars that play live music and a spliff for 300 baht (£6 GBP) to go with your rum and coke. Walking along the strip one evening, we were drawn to a restaurant that was playing live music and here we met a South African signer called Stevie. This guy produced Anthony Hamilton’s album- one of my favourite songs I haven’t heard in a very long time is on that album “Charlene”. This little dude is such a character and a right multi-tasker- he sings and plays all sorts of percussion and really feels the music. He was such a pleasure to watch.

There wasn’t much catered for as weird vegans and I was beginning to get a little tired of rice and noodles. In fact I started craving for potatoes- it’s been weeks since I had proper potatoes! But here is where we discovered Pancakes (egg and dairy free ones) served with a small bowl of Massaman Curry – these were a great snack but super fattening. You can find Pancakes stalls all over- generally they park themselves outside the Seven Elevens.

“The Phuket Vegetarian Festival is a colourful event held over a nine-day period in October, celebrating the Chinese community’s belief that abstinence from meat and various stimulants during the ninth lunar month of the Chinese calendar will help them obtain good health and peace of mind”

We took a two hour bumpy Air Asia flight to Southern Thailand (Phuket). Please don’t judge but we headed to the mega tourist hotspot Patong! For those who don’t know, Patong is sort of the equivalent of Magaluf but catered purely for men.

We stayed at the Frutta Boutique which is located just 800 meters from the beach. This hotel is fantastic. Not only it was £8 per night, you can help yourself to exotic fruit at reception and use their bicycles at no extra charge. Great first impressions, but on the first night I found a load of ants on the bed. Obviously I was unable to relax and demanded a room change. The hotel was very accommodating and upgraded us to a bigger and slightly flashier room – SWEET! However, that night I couldn’t entirely relax and I felt itchy all the time so poor OK had to examine and reassure me that I had absolutely no ants on my body. 

Weather in Patong was a lot better than Chiang Mai. It would rain heavily for about an hour and then the sun would be out for the rest of the day- this gave me time to hit the beach and work on my tan. Patong beach is just over two miles long and typically it’s filled with sun loungers, beach sellers selling sunglasses, fruit, sarongs and a go on a Jet Ski. One thing I really enjoy about the beach is people watching and in Patong there are some characters! I saw one woman walking along the shore with a thong bikini bottom (no problem, I have plenty of them) and silver nipple tassels! Hey, she is still kind of covering her modesty.

We found a cute street food stall just across the road from the hotel. Its run by a really sweet Thai lady who took a liking to me as her husband is from England. She was very interested in our lives and where we’re going to go and how much she loves England. They served the most amazing Pumpkin Curry EVER (it’s in season so I’m taking advantage) for only 40 baht (about 80p) - I literally had it twice a day.

On the third day, I dragged OK out of bed super early as I was uber keen to see a special street parade in the city centre which was approximately 40 minutes’ drive away (parade was part of the veggie festival).  One of the hotel staff offered to give us a ride- WINNING! Once we arrived, we were caught up in a massive traffic jam and crowds of people; almost everyone was dressed in white and us brownies felt slightly out of place (Why did I choose to wear a mini skirt and a halter neck today?). As we were getting closer to the parade, there was a cloud of dark smoke and beats of drums getting louder and louder. By this point we got out of the car and stood behind the crowd but close enough to see the parade (ideal when the majority in Asia are tinny tiny). A man appeared dressed in what looked like ancient warrior clothing and a sword pierced through his cheeks “Oh my word! What did this dude do to himself?” The sword was so long he had to hold it up with both hands, as you can imagine what the consequences might be if he didn’t. He had an entourage of about five people, one of them was holding toilet roll (I’m guessing this was to wipe his cheeks now and then). You then see men casually walking along with similar clothing one after another but with different kinds of swords. Others had two guns pierced through, another had a tricycle and even a garden hose through their cheeks. Oh my god, one guy looked like he was a pineapple spit roast!  There was a strong smell of burning matches and sounds of small explosions because spectators were throwing firecrackers into the parade. This seemed normal as there were no signs of panic (although I was on edge most of the time). I couldn’t help think these men with sharp objects sticking out of their mouths are in a proper vulnerable position and you’re throwing firecrackers?  This is mental! At one point, there was so many of them being thrown at once it felt like we were in the middle of a war zone- there were screams, a lot of smoke, loud bangs, blood and self-brutalities…It was very intense and certainly not for the faint hearted.

In the evening you got to head out to the main strip called Bangla Road Walk. Once you come here you’ll probably see everything. Firstly you’ll constantly get hassled by street vendors trying to sell you cheap tat i.e. glow sticks, laser pens and friendship bracelets (custom made by the way). Then you get a swarm of bar/club promoters offering cheap booze at the titty bars and free entry to the infamous Ping Pong shows! These promoters will stick a list in your face of all the “things” their finest ladies can do if ping pong doesn’t tickle your fancy (please refer to picture for the entire list).

So walking along bar after bar after bar! I see feathers from a distance and to my excitement I rushed over and saw a group of ladies all with Adam’s Apples, slightly big hands and a sort of teenage boy’s voice that’s about to break when they spoke! Yes they were Ladyboys! They were all dolled up, faces properly caked up, wearing fantastic and skimpy outfits (very cabaret)- one had very oddly shaped boob implants. They were promoting their show and also gave the public the opportunity to take photographs- but at a price though! It’s 100 baht per photo. I tried to sneak in a picture and almost got bitch slapped by one of them- still got my picture though!

Bangla Road Walk was also another great place to people watch because all the bars are open air. One evening I witnessed something so unbelievable- a woman, who looked a bit like a junkie, dressed in yesterday’s clothing (I’m trying to paint a picture here). She sat on a red plastic stall in front of us and decided to urinate through her clothing whilst on the stall. You can actually see the urine just free flowing (apologies for the graphic details); and she didn’t have a care in the world, she was talking and smoking her cigarette and people walking by not noticing what was happening LOL. She stood up and casually walked off with soaked bottoms and urine trickling down her thigh! Now I’ve seen it all! Thanks to her I’m now suspicious of every small puddle. What a SKANK!