AJ Weight Loss Journey

I wasn't always heavy. At 28 I was 130 lbs at 5' 7" tall. I got pregnant, went up to 180 lbs, but by my 6 week checkup I was down to 140 lbs.

Then I decided to get the birth control shot Depo-Provera, and my weight shot up to 180 again. I've never been below that since. I can blame part of my weight on this medication, but if I'm honest, other things changed, too. At that point in my life, my husband and I were finally getting more financially secure, and we started eating out a lot.

Fast forward 3 years and I fell into a deep depression, which had me in its grip for the next year before I finally got a diagnosis and professional help. By that time my marriage was in shambles due to some poor choices I made and the strain that came from having to deal with my mood swings. Shortly thereafter, we separated and eventually divorced. I've not had a significant romantic relationship since then.

I'm now 54, and I've tried so many ways to loose the weight. I joke that I'm as big as I am because I "gave up men and took up with Ben and Jerry." That's not completely false. I've spent the last 20 years trying to medicate myself with food. I've been hiding inside my bigger body, hoping to never have to go through heartache again. The few dates I've had never got to a second date, so I've resigned myself to just be ok with being alone.

I wonder what makes this time trying to loose weight any different? I'm sure my friends and family are tired of hearing me say "this time will be different..." and giving one reason or the other why I think I will succeed. I do have a vacation coming at the end of the year, for which I'd like to be 40 lbs lighter.

I'm still striving to go full vegan whole food plant based. I'm not using oils in cooking (not that I cook that often) but I'm still eating out too frequently. Cooking is a challenge for me because, frankly, I suck at it. They say the more you cook you'll get better at it, but so far I'm not finding that to be true.

At any rate, if you are still reading, thank you for listening to my ramblings. If you're also struggling with weight issues, feel free to message me if you want someone to talk to. Maybe we can help each other?

One of my biggest weaknesses is sweets. I get cravings after eating anything that’s high in carbohydrates. As part of my efforts I am eliminating sugar sweetened deserts or snacks. It’s like an addiction; I get upset when I don’t have sweets.

I know that sugar is in many other things like ketchup and salad dressings. For right now I’m only going to worry about the overt sugars and I’ll tackle the rest later.

I'm learning to listen to my body and stop eating when I start to feel full. At lunch I only ate 1/2 the bowl from the cafeteria. It was falafel and pasta. The pasta will be tomorrow's lunch.

However....

....Then I got a bag of mini Oreos, peanut M&Ms and pretzel Combos.

This isn't going to work if I don't stop eating crap.

I have a cruise coming in December so I can’t waste any more time. Started WFPB this morning with oatmeal.

Another picture of me from last spring when I was in Barcelona.

To fit in an airplane seat without a seatbelt extender.

To shop at any clothing store I want - not plus size only.

To have the energy to walk 5 miles or more when traveling.

To wear nice shoes with heels.

To be able to use my soaking tub (right now I can’t pull myself out).

One thing that would help me would be to develop some coping skills when stress levels get high or to combat boredom eating. Eating is also very social for me as most of my friends want to go out to eat when we get together. I need to find an exercise group to join so that I can get social support without going to a restaurant.

The downside of an exercise group is right now I’m very sedentary and being 150 pounds overweight physical activity is difficult. I tried working with a personal trainer, but she was much younger than me and didn’t understand that when you’re in your 50s and this far overweight things that seem simple to her are really hard for me. Some people would say you have to push yourself and I would agree to that, but there’s a limit each of us has when we’re first starting out. Squats are horrible on my knees for example. And if I get on the floor for exercises I can’t get back up without help.

I know it's cliché but I'm starting my weight loss journey today. Starting weight: 284 pounds. I'm 54 years old and 5'7".

I've watched a lot of nutrition videos and I really want to be whole food plant based in the New Year. I've been vegetarian since 2018 but I keep getting stuck on cheese. I know it's the worst of the worst, but it's so addictive. This will be one of the challenges I'll have to work through. The other will be sweets and another will be cooking at home rather than going out to eat.

I have a goal to lose 52 pounds in 2023, which should be reasonable. I also want to start walking at least 30 minutes a day to start, then as I get smaller, start adding more time and some strength training. Wish me luck!

Here's me :)