The fact that this is the same person sends me.

in the early stages of their relationship—after they finally decide it is, in fact, a relationship—trinity is still very insecure. despite yolanda’s regular reassurances that she is more than enough, trinity constantly feels the need to prove herself, to prove to yolanda that she is worth keeping around.

when yolanda cooks for her, trinity feels like she’s supposed to do the same. if yolanda is sharing these parts of her heritage, dominican and panamanian dishes her father and mother made for her growing up, shouldn’t trinity be making filipino foods for her? she’s supposed to reciprocate—she knows by now that she doesn’t just get without having to give something in return.

but, she quickly realizes when she finds herself in her kitchen, she doesn’t have family recipes. at least not ones accessible to her. no one ever shared this part of her heritage with her, no one ever taught her how or what to cook. she has always been on her own.

that night, she finds herself distant and quiet. enough so that yolanda notices and asks what’s wrong.

mortifyingly, trinity starts crying, choking out apologies for being unable to give yolanda what she deserves. she also grieves a connection to her family and her culture that she has never had, unlike her girlfriend.

yolanda consoles her. trinity remains sad but is a lot less insecure by the end of the night. she is more comfortable in her relationship and confident in her role as yolanda’s girlfriend, though she is still struggling with that connection she lacks.

she is entirely unaware of the plans yolanda is already concocting.

yolanda reaches out to a filipina neighbor and chats with princess and perlah, collecting recipes for her and trinity to make. together, they figure out which ones most closely resemble what trinity grew up eating and which are even better. they experiment with spices and sometimes treat instructions and measurements as mere suggestions. over time, they craft their own little traditions, their own family cookbook.

GarCiCis Pizza