luvbug

“I already told you no.” Mike's voice was stern as he pushed off the girl tugging his arm back. He was walking to his locker after lunch. Robin had just given them all information on the next crawl; and his best friend Y/n started up her antics of begging to be let in again. “It was no last time. It’s no this time. It’ll be no next time.” He turned around, looking her in the eye with a dead stare. “No.”

Y/n pouted. Mike hated when she did that. He hated how sweet and persuasive she looked. Mike would give her the world if he could–and all it would take to convince him were to be her looking up at him with those innocent eyes. He gave into her all the time. Lunch, homework answers, what movie to watch. He gave in to Y/n so easily, so much so that everyone else in the party had started to tease him about it. 

Apparently Mike's crush on Y/n was obvious to everyone except her. But this was different. This wasn’t buying Coke over Pepsi at the store, this was life or death. Mike might be stupid enough to let his crush on Y/n turn him into her personal compiler, but he wasn’t dumb enough to let her get killed because of it. 

“Please” Y/n whined “Please, Mike, Please!” Her hands were wrapped around his upper arm, keeping him in place while she begged “Everyone else is okay with me going except for you. Why can’t I go?”

“And do what? Go with Hop into the Upside Down and get yourself killed?” Mike shook her hand off. 

“No! But I could help you and Lucas be on the lookou-” 

Mike cut her off by opening his locker in front of her face. “I already said no, Y/n. Me and Lucas don’t need any help.” He grabbed his books and shoved them into his bag, closing his locker with a hard slam.

She glared at him, face turning angrier than the sad pout she wore moments before. “Everyone else in the party is a part of this. Everyone else in this entire place is a part of this except for me!”

“You don’t need to be a part of this!” They were getting loud. They really shouldn't be talking about this in public. God, why did she have to be so stubborn. “Everyone has their jobs, we don’t need you, Y/n.” 

Mike watched the hurt flash across her face. She pursed her lips together and looked up at him. “Fine, then I don’t do crawls but, but at least let me join the meetings. Let me know what's going on!” 

Mike pushed himself off of the lockers he was leaning on and began walking to his next class. Chemistry, one of the few classes he didn’t have with her. Lucky him. Y/n continued to argue the entire walk down the hall. Mike was getting annoyed. Couldn’t she understand that this was for her own good? That Mike was doing this to protect her? Why did she have to be so ignorant?

“-and sure, I don’t have powers. But that’s not my fault! I want to be helpful!”

Mike turned around with a heavy expression. He needed her to stop. He needed Y/n to go home, home where she would be safe and sound, and he would see her in the morning and tell her all about it. Maybe Mike was being too nice, maybe that's why she wouldn’t listen. 

“You’re right!” Mike cut off her endless rambling. “You don’t have powers. You can’t drive. You can’t fight. You can’t code or track. Hell, you can barely stay quiet for five minutes. Do you want us to all die? Do you want this to fail? Seriously, Y/n, why can’t you understand that we. don’t. want. you. there. Go home after school, take a nap, read a book. Do whatever you want and tell me all about it tomorrow morning” Mike ran a hand through his hair “You’re my best friend, Y/n, and you know I care about you just as much as the other guys,” Lie, he cared about her so, so much more. “But you’re useless here” 

Mike watched the words settle into Y/n. He bit back a cringe himself. Useless. Jeez, that was harsh. Tears filled her eyes, daring to spill out. Y/n took a step away from him, looking up at him with an expression he couldn’t read; it was some mix of anger and sadness and disgust, even. She shook her head lightly to herself. 

“Screw you, Mike Wheeler.” and with that, Y/n turned around and stormed her way down the hallway. 

Mike took a deep breath. He ran a hand across his face, feeling the heat climb up to his cheeks. Good, he told himself, this was good. If she was mad at him then she would be safe. He watched her leave, head facing the ground as she weaved through the crowds of people walking to their next class. He and Y/n had only ever fought once in the several years he’s known her. It was when they were twelve, and Mike told her she wasn’t allowed to join him, Lucas, Will, and Dustin for a Star Wars marathon sleepover. Boys only, he told her. She ignored them all for days leading up to the sleepover. That was when Mike first realized he liked her. He missed her presence all the days she was gone; he spent each and every minute wishing he could see her stupid smile or hear her dumb laugh. Mike didn’t even like Star Wars. In fact, he liked Y/n so much better. So, on the actual night of the sleepover, he snuck out and biked to Y/n’s house and begged her to join them to watch Grease–her favorite movie. The boys hated Grease. 

“Good luck fixing that” A familiar voice drew him out of his trip down memory lane. He turned his head to the side to see who was there. Lucas, with the most disappointed look Mike had ever seen. 

“What did you want me to do!” Mike said defensively “She never stops bugging me about it! I don’t understand why she won’t take no for an answer” 

“Oh, I dunno, maybe because it's not a real answer” Lucas countered “Why don’t you just tell her the truth?”

Mike swallowed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Lucas rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Don’t do that. You’ve been in love with this girl since the first time she quoted Star Trek. All you gotta do is look her in the eyes and say ‘Y/n, the truth is…I love you! I love you more than anything ever! And I can’t lose you-” Mike cut off Lucas’s dramatic lamenting by covering his mouth with his hand and shoving him into the locker. 

“Stop it! I don’t-I don’t…that. She’s just a friend” 

Lucas forced his hands off his mouth and gave Mike a look. Mike knew this look, he knew it too well. It was the same look Lucas gave him every time he avoided his feelings for Y/n. “You better hope tonight's crawl goes well,” His voice was serious and low. “And you better hope that she’s sweet enough to forgive you, because that was some messed up bullshit you just told her. And after she forgives you, which we all know she will–because she’s the purest soul out there–you better man the hell up and tell her the truth…you don’t want something to happen and you have to spend God knows how long regretting it”

Mike thought of Max, comatose in the hospital for so long with no signs of getting better; and he thought of Lucas, by her side every chance he could. He wondered what it was like to lose someone that you loved–not that he loved Y/n–and he knew he wouldn’t be able to live if he was in Lucas’s position. Especially not if it was her. Especially not if it was his fault.

But first, tonight's crawl. Mike had to take things one step at a time. The crawl first, then Y/n. That was how it had to be–seperate. 

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Y/n didn’t go to her next class. How could she sit through English after her best friend told her she was useless? Instead, Y/n snuck out of Hawkins High School, hopped on her bike, and escaped that hellhole as fast as she could. Tears blurred her vision as she sped down the roads. Y/n made little note of the cars on the road next to her, she ignored all her surroundings almost entirely. All she could think of were Mike’s words replaying in her head. Useless, can’t shut up for even five minutes, we don’t want you. Did he really mean all that? Could he really be so cruel? Y/n began to miss Max now more than ever. It was different when she was around, it was better having another girl around. Sure, El was there, but she was…weird, reserved. Max was bold enough for all three of the girls combined. She was brave, fearless, amazing. 

With a screech, Y/n turned her bike around, no longer deciding to go home and cry into her pillow. No; instead, she would be visiting an old friend. 

The hospital wasn’t busy when Y/n walked in. There were a couple nurses shuffling around, a few family members lounging around in the waiting room, but overall it was dead. As Y/n took the elevator up to Max’s room, she wiped the tears from her eyes. She could hear Max’s voice in her head shaming her for crying over stupid boys. She would make fun of Y/n even more for that stupid boy being Mike Wheeler. 

It wouldn’t be the first time either. Max was the one who consoled Y/n when she ran out of the Snow Ball crying after Mike and El kissed on the dance floor. 

“It’s okay, Y/n” Max soothed as she rubbed Y/n’s shoulder. “Mike is an idiot. Seriously, an absolute idiot. You’re better than him. Way, way, way better”

Y/n sniffled and shook her head. “It’s stupid,” She muttered, “so stupid. I mean, no wonder he likes her instead of me. She’s so cool. She has powers. She’s pretty…Mike would never like me, not with her there”

Max got up off her seat next to Y/n and knelt in front of her, taking Y/n’s hands in hers. “Hey,” she said, “look at me.” Y/n looked up to meet Max with teary eyes. “You are amazing, Y/n. You are smart, and beautiful, and the sweetest girl to ever enter Hawkins, Indiana. Never, and I mean never, let stupid ass Mike Wheeler let you think you are anything but. Mike doesn’t know what he’s missing. You deserve the best, because that’s what you are. The best.”

Y/n remembered every moment of Mike and El’s short attempt at a relationship. It lasted about two weeks before they both realized they were better off as friends. Lucas said Mike only liked her because she was the only girl Mike knew. Y/n said she was a girl Mike knew also. Lucas just laughed. 

Max’s room was filled with flowers and pictures, most of which were brought by Lucas. She was pale, eyes stuck closed and hair braided into two little pigtails on each side of her bed. Y/n sat down on the chair next to her bed and put her hand gently on top of Max’s. 

“Hey, Max” she said softly, a break building up in her throat. All those tears she had tried to wipe away had begun to come back at the sight of her best friend. “I’m sorry I don’t visit you more often…I think I was scared. But that’s not fair to you, you wouldn’t be scared” Y/n took in a deep breath, watching Max’s unwavering expression. She looked so peaceful, it was almost discomforting. “I wish I could be helping, I wish I could be out there, working hard to defeat Vecna. Maybe it would help bring you back.” Tears began to stream down her face again “I miss you so much, Max. Things aren’t the same without you here. Mike-he, well, you know how he is” She let out a chuckle and imagined Max, wherever she was, was laughing along with her. “He’s been so mean lately, I don’t understand it…You’d beat him if you heard the things he said to me today. I know he doesn’t like me–well, he likes me as a friend– you know what I mean, but sometimes it feels like he really hates me. I mean, everyone else is allowed to be a part of these things, El’s a part of things” Y/n’s tone turned bitter “but she has powers, and Mike loves that…I dunno, Max. You would know what to do, you always do.” 

Y/n continued to Max for almost two hours, a one sided conversation full of laughter, cries, anger. She told Max about as much as she could remember from the past 18 months. How Mike tried to teach her to skateboard and she busted her lip, how Dustin and her built a little robot and they argued over whether or not it should have a little bow on the top, how Will made her a painting that hands above her bed. Y/n talked for as long as her mind let her. Eventually it was time for her to go home. She stood up, pressed a soft kiss to the side of Max’s head, grabbed her things, and left. 

At the doorway to the hallway, Y/n turned around to look at her friend one last time. “Thanks, Max” she whispered, more to herself than anything.

And with that she was gone. 

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Mike was tired. He was covered in blood, dirt, and who knew what else. His ears rang with the chaos from earlier. The crawl had gone terribly, as terrible as possible without anyone dying…atleast not yet. Holly was gone, his parents were in the hospital. Mike could feel the hopelessness course through his body, dread and pain filling his blood with every passing minute. He needed to sleep, he needed to shower, he needed to feel okay. 

He couldn’t go home, he heard the description of his house from Nancy. Blood was everywhere, broken glass and ruins of his kitchen all over the house. He saw his mom in passing as the doctors wheeled her into the hospital. It didn’t look good. It didn’t look good at all. 

He sat in the waiting room with Nancy, sweat building up at the back of his neck and forehead. He tore off his beanie and threw it down onto the chair next to him. 

“Go home,” Nancy told him “You look terrible. Wash up, get some sleep. I can handle things here”

Mike shook his head. “I can’t. Holly is-”

“Holly won’t be getting any help from you if you’re half asleep and look like walking death” Nancy scolded. “I’m serious. Go home, Mike. You need it” 

“I can’t,” Mike persisted “Home is-it’s all-I can’t…” He thought of the ruins that were his home right now. He couldn’t walk in there, much less sleep. 

Nancy let out an empathetic sigh. “I’m sure one of your friends will let you crash? I dunno, Mike, but you really should figure it out.” Nancy stood up and walked off, not giving Mike the option to argue back. 

Mike went to the only place his mind would let him think of. Y/n’s house. It was late, about three in the morning. She was probably sleeping. Still, he biked his way in the dark, each turn feeling like muscle memory. He knew these roads like the back of his hand, biking in the dark was no issue. The cool air was a temporary relief, blowing his hair away from his face and reminding him of a certain peace. 

He dropped his bike on her front lawn, wincing a bit at the noise it made. As he walked up to the steps he remembered their argument earlier. He wanted to apologize. Really, he did. But how could he? How could he even face her looking like this–like a lost dog needing a place to stay? Still, he knocked. Once, twice, a third time. 

Y/n opened the door with a confused, asleep look on her face. She was wearing a pale pink nightgown, hair in a messy braid dangling over her left shoulder. Her eyes were half lidded, looking up at Mike with sleep threatening to enter her body once again. Y/n rubbed her eyes with her hands, forcing them open a little more. “Mike..?” her voice was pitchy and weak “What’re you- are you okay?” She had finally woken up enough to comprehend Mike.

Mike watched as her face turned to concern and worry. She reached out a gentle hand to Mike’s chest. It was soft, tentative, as if she was making sure he was real. God, Mike thought to himself, why did she have to look like this right now–like an angel from heaven, like beauty redefined, like each and every one of Mike's dreams combined into one? How could she be so gentle, so sweet, even after all Mike had said to her?  He couldn’t take it, the longer he looked at her the more he fell apart. The thought of her being there entered his mind. Y/n, in a bed alongside his mom, hurt and about to die because of him. He lost it then, dropping to his knees right in her doorway. He began to cry, each breath a quiver and releasing more tears. 

Y/n froze, looking down at the boy on his knees in front of her. What the hell happened tonight? Y/n pulled herself out of her mind, dropping to the floor in front of Mike. Her hands reached out to cup Mike’s  face, a comfort he immediately melted into. “Hey, hey, Mike” She said softly “it’s okay, you’re okay, it’s okay” 

Mike shook his head, unsteady tears falling down his face. His hands wrapped around her wrists, holding her tight as if it were the only thing keeping her there. “I’m sorry” he cried “I’m so sorry, Y/n. Tonight-tonight…it was bad, so, so bad.” His eyes were almost desperate as they looked up at her. “Holly’s gone…my mom and dad are-they’re in the hospital”

“Oh, Mike” was the only thing that could leave her lips “I’m so sorry”

Mike continued to stare at her, he watched as tears slowly creeped into her eyes. “No” he whispered “don’t be sorry” his lips shook, his chest heaving “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry Y/n you’ll never understand. I-I lied, I lied straight to your face earlier, clean through my teeth. Do you understand? Why don’t you ever see it?” God, he was rambling, she looked so confused. “You aren’t useless, Y/n, you aren’t short of anything but amazing.” He finally let go of her wrists, scooting closer and cupping her face in his own hands. 

“Amazing, Y/n, you’re amazing. You could probably beat up any one of us guys in the party, you’re smart as hell. I mean, I probably wouldn’t have been able to pass math last year if it weren’t for you. And-and, well-okay, you’re really bad at shutting up” They both let out a scoff. Mike was getting nervous, his eyes darting around. “But that's okay! I would never want you to. Because everything you say is worth listening to. Every stupid joke, every song you sing, every laugh, all of it. I want to hear all of it. And, and I’m scared that if you join us on these things, if I put you in danger…” He took a moment to take a breath, to look her back in the eyes. There were small tears dripping down her cheeks, but the tiniest smile in her eyes. She was looking up at him like he was the world, a prophet speaking truths to be savored. “If I put you in danger,” he continued, slow now, “I’m scared I’ll never hear any of those things again. Do you-are you, do you get it?” 

Mike looked down to her lips, a guilty pleasure; but then he saw she was smiling, and Mike began to smile, too. 

“You’re an idiot, Mike Wheeler” was all she said. 

Mike laughed through his tears, pressing his face into her hands that still held him so gently. 

Eventually Y/n stood them up from the floor, closing the front door and leading Mike to her bedroom. Luckily, she had one of Mike’s old shirts and pairs of sweatpants somewhere in the back of her closet. Neither of them knew why it was there, but they both took it as a sign that they were supposed to spend the night together. 

Mike showered and changed, most of the dread and tiredness washing off his body. He used her body wash, secretly indulging in being covered in her smell. Mike wondered if she really understood all that he was saying. Should he have kissed her? Fuck, he totally should’ve kissed her. He let the water fall down his face as he let out a loud sigh. The weight of the crawl and all it took from Mike felt lighter than it did before, like being around Y/n took the burden of overthinking off his shoulders. 

When he got back to her room, dried off and in his new change of clothes, Y/n made him sit on the floor so she could brush his hair. He relished in each and every touch, her fingers combing through his head and offering him the occasional gentle scratch on the scalp. 

She forced him to sleep in her bed next to him, whispered him “goodnight” before turning off her lamp and covering herself with her blanket. 

Mike didn’t really know what love felt like, at least not romantically; but, as he laid in Y/n’s bed–staring at the wall and listening to the soft sound of her breathing–he felt like this was at least pretty close. 

In her sleep, Y/n turned around and tucked herself into Mike’s side–an embrace he welcomed with everything he could. He wrapped his arm around her body, his hand lightly resting on her waist over the blanket. 

Mike didn’t sleep much that night, his dreams full of memories from the crawl. Each time he woke up, he looked at the girl sleeping peacefully on his side, and his troubles felt less impossible to deal with. 

Tomorrow, Mike needed to be at the Squawk by 9am. He would wake up early, surprise Y/n with breakfast in bed as a thank you for letting him stay the night. He would get ready alongside Y/n in a quiet peace. Maybe, if he could muster up the courage, he would kiss her–his way of making sure she really understood what he meant last night. Or, maybe, for the time being, holding her hand would be enough. Mike hadn’t worked out those details yet. Once they were both ready, they would get on their bikes and head to the Squawk. 

i think will should’ve came into season five with a love interest. not dating but someone that he’s been spending time with that we see a few hints of at the end of season four and the beginning of season five. i think the time skip was poor writing and that time could’ve been used establishing this possible relationship with someone. a short cute parallel to vickie and robin would’ve been a perfect way to end season four. on the nose? maybe, but good nonetheless.

now! season five will is confused. he’s closeted, he’s getting really close to a guy, but he’s also still harboring feelings for his best friend. it’s complex, it’s confusing, it’s making him insecure and scared and maybe a little guilty. will doesn’t know what to do. he sees robin and vickie at the hospital, he talks to her about it. that talk from robin about signs and shoves and little noticings isn’t completely fucking useless because oh! random guy does that, and he likes when random guy does that. will realizes that his feelings for mike have been holding him back from being truthful with random guy. he confesses to his mom and a select few not because he’s scared of vecna but because he likes random guy and he wants to be proud of that feeling.

BUT even with my poor attention span i figured out el and kalis grand ole secret plan immediately. like, cmon guys. byler had their awkward “we’re still best friends” talk just like i figured. they gave el a pussy ending with this not dead but gone crap. poor writing.

i will say somehow the one thing they did right was the mileven bones for an entire fuckin season and then that kiss. it was so sad and i think it wouldn’t have held so much emotion if it weren’t for the fact that no one could tell they were together for the entire season. that and giving sexy mike wheeler a gun, that was hot.

other than that the entire last season and series finale fell short. the will epilogue boyfriend was even more tragic than expected(seriously??? not even a speaking role??) i can’t place my finger on what exactly it is but the whole thing just felt wrong. the duffer brothers need to stop using time skips.