so fresh and so clean clean

“well, well, well. looks like they finally called the party in for you lot. who wants to get a drink with me?” dua smirked to the other, looking them over. “this place could use some fun.” 

“and not a moment too late.” zayn smirked, looking down at the beer in his hands, already half empty. “you could always go grab a pint and join me on the couch?” he asked, grabbing the remote and turning off the television. 

Yeah, right. Of course. What else did you prefer me to do? Go and talk about it? We were basically doing a press run on Zayn leaving the band, I wasn’t going to go and start talking about an issue that wasn’t my own to discuss and exactly like you said, issues I knew nothing about, so yes. I joked about it, it was the only way I knew how to deal with all that, I never made fun of you personally or your issues. I did what I could to respect your decision, and deal with it as publicly as we had to. If you want to compare making jokes as a form of divert the attention to give a full interview on how we never were even close, then by all means. I apologize if I ever offended you, I did what I though was best at the time, to both protect your privacy, respect your decision, and support the band and the lads, you will never know what we’ve been through with the aftermath of you leaving the way that you did. 

do you hear yourself right now, harry? you’re literally putting the band before my health and you’re seriously standing there telling me that you had no idea what went on with me? were you completely blind? it came to a point where the band meant nothing to me- that’s how fuckin’ numb i became and don’t fucking talk to me about aftermaths! you have no idea how i struggled but yeah, let’s talk about you lot. let’s talk about how i was the reason you couldn’t continue as a band. it wasn’t because liam was a fucked up drunk. it wasn’t because louis continued to shame one direction with his poor decisions. it wasn’t because we literally got locked inside our hotel rooms. it wasn’t because we were constantly labeled as gays which made our girlfriends fear for their lives. but yeah, let’s put the blame on me. you keep telling yourself that. i got out because i had to and if you couldn’t continue, then that wasn’t my fault. the only reason i said what i said  was because you didn’t have my back when i needed you the most. you turned on me the second i decided to save myself.

oh wow, so you are a fan. but yes!!! go watch the trailer. 

you thought i was a fakey? i’m usually not full of shit unless.. well i am full of shit. imma go watch it now. 

we can eat by the pool! but hey, are you hating on slytherin? you better not be. that’s my hogwarts house. and i happen to not hate the malfoys. i think their manipulation made them act shitty, but had the story been reversed, we’d love malfoy and hate harry. it’s all on reader perception!!! … just kidding it’s not that deep, he’s a dick. 

pool it is then, babe. why would i hate on the malfoys? that makes no sense whatsoever. i´m a slytherin as well and i know this because i actually take great pride in being a dick. now, you might think “zayn, that’s not something to be proud of” and i say; well, in general people are shit and if they show me that they are the opposite, then it’s just a nice turn of event. 

I think that’s a fair assessment, but it sounds like you might be having a change in mindset yeah? I am, yeah. Sollentuna, it’s about…half hour from Stockholm? I love it there, only usually get back in the summers now though. You’re from the UK right? 

I think you’re absolutely right about that, mate. For some reason no one else seems to care about the drama, so it’s not like I’m entirely alone in here, which is wicked. That’s cool, though. I’ve been to Stockholm but that’s about it.. and I didn’t exactly leave the hotel. Yeah, I’m from Bradford. It’s a small place in West Yorkshire.. or well, not exactly small. 

You should, you’ll see that once you get over the initial drama you’ll have some fun. I don’t know, I mean I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who hate me so. Oh but there are Zayn, I’m sure there are. Great, I’m glad I could help somehow. 

oh you mean the ‘you’re a tosser, zayn. fuck off’ drama that seems to be going on at the moment? yeah, you’re absolutely right about that. i mean, i got your back if a certain baldwin comes in here. how are you doing these days, gomez? 

labels aren’t needed for a meal, i’d think? it’s … a meal. a fine meal. hmm. i may or may not have been a directioner. don’t expose me like that! mr. band breaker upper. i’m totally kidding, by the way. 

fine meal it is then. how about we take the meal by the pool instead of sitting that that long dinner table? seems a bit malfoys-ish to sit two people at a long-ass table. you were.. did you see the smile on your face in that photo? who was your favorite? nah, don’t worry about it, love. i’ve been called worse and you’re not completely wrong. i take great pride in being the ‘justin’ of the band. or the ‘robbie’ if we’re going full brit. 

i know i miss the majority of the ones who were in the first and second film. luckily, i got natalie back this go round!!!

you know who i miss the most? fandral, hogun, and volstagg. i mean, their dynamic and banter with thor was literally the best. wait, natalie’s coming back? good for thor!

i was prepared to say it’s going well, but the fact that you have to ask is a little concerning. i mean, nobody comments that i need to think of the children whenever i post anything slightly nsfw & out of pocket anymore, so i’ll still say it’s pretty well in the rear view mirror. not to get deep, but this is the first time i’ve felt like i’m allowed to be my true authentic self, y’know ? zayn, that’s so .. ugh. i get it. but still, i’m disappointed. one direction didn’t hit the same without your high notes. then taking one for the team it’ll be. i know it’ll be hard but please do try to keep your eyes up, okay ?

naw, what i meant was that i just know how long it took for some of the other circle of disney’s to completely erase that part of them. take a look at the jonas brothers for instant.. how hard it was for them to turn their backs on disney and how schocked people were when nick came out with chains. i’m happy for you, tho. i do relate to some of it.. i just think i had a bit easier than the rest of the guys, because my role in the band was the one who didn’t give a shit. dove, i know.. tell me about it. payne did his best but let’s be honest here, it wasn’t the same. can’t make that promise, love. 

You really did. My bad, almost believed you give a shit for a second there. You are apologizing but you’re not looking for forgiveness? Okay, you lost me there, whatever mate. Do your thing, I’ll do mine. For sure will make the best out of my time here, I do hope you can do the same, you won’t find me getting on your way either. Well, that is good news, I’m glad, that you are doing better, hope it all goes well, there’s a lot of great people around to get to know, good luck with everything. 

i can apologize without wanting forgiveness, harry. it’s really not that hard to have self-awareness and yet still not wanting the lot of you to literally forgive me for what i said. you also seem to forget that you didn’t exactly treat me the best when i left. how many jokes did you make at my expense during interviews, huh? shit, it’s funny that you all knew exactly what went on with me, eating disorder and anxiety to name a few, yet still found it okay to take my name and make jokes about it. 

then i guess i will see you saturday. hey, you can’t look at it like .. you’re stuck, or it’s not gonna be any fun. you gotta own this place. make it fun. for lack of a better way to put it, make this experience your bitch. that’s what i do when i take on a challenging role. 

it’s a date--- or a dinner date... what the hell do we even call it? friends-dinner? now, i know for a fact that you used to be a directioner, yeah? then you must know that i was the brooding kinda lad, so are you really that surprised that i’m somewhat negative all the time? 

she’s very hard to impress when it comes to comedy, but all around a very sweet lady.  and hey, i didn’t do that, the writers did it! taika is AMAZING. but it truly was what was needed to save the franchise. get help was my favorite joke. i wish hiddleston was here to demonstrate. 

i only had the pleasure of running into her once, but she does seem like a nice one. that i also believe but it sorta kick-started thor’s role as a serious asgardian to a the class clown of the group. dude, i think we’re a lot people who would love to see tom in here. 

-

I was told the same thing and so far, I’ve been enjoying it. Hopefully, no one that I have issues with will show up here. I’m sorry that this isn’t going as you planned, maybe you shouldn’t let it get to you, actually enjoy this opportunity to meet new people and make new friends. You don’t have to deal with the drama if you don’t want to.”

That’s great, love. I’m glad that you’re enjoying it so far and I promise that I’ll try and give it a chance before calling the quits. Who do you even have issues with? I can’t imagine anyone going against you. I think you’re right and I’m going to focus on making new acquaintances.

i was going to cook for everyone at once, but i reckon i can do a private dinner, especially for you. it’ll take a day or so for the groceries to be delivered. so shall i cook for you on say.. .saturday? 

especially for me? now you’re just spoiling me, love. well, it’s not exactly like i have any plans in the near future due to the fact that i’m stuck here, so saturday sounds wicked. looking forward to it.