𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖒𝖕𝖎𝖔𝖓

“i love you, too,” she responded, stepping in closer to him and wrapping her arms around his torso. “and it’s not fine. it’s shameful and embarrassing.” a soft sigh left her lips, “I know that we’re going to have ups and downs and everything but this is like a new low.” or at least it was for her. the most she could do at this point was hope that her dad came around once he let go of his grudge. “you shouldn’t have to put up with it, but the fact that you’re willing to means a lot to me. more than words can say.” nicola nodded as they got into the car, “i could definitely use a drink or two. and everythings all lit up for the holidays so itll be nice.”

with her fathers words from their previous conversation echoing in her mind, nicola was starting to see why sometimes her family was perceived the way that they were. the holier than thou persona, portraying a vibe that made it seem like they were better than the rest. she just hadn’t seen it executed in a way that affected her so personally. the blonde took a few moments and attempted to decompress before standing up and turning off the water in the shower. standing at the sink she would splash her face with some cold water before listening to her voicemail. forcing a slight smile at his joke she pocketed her phone and exited the bathroom. grabbing her coat from the closet she put it on on her way toward the door, closing it behind her after she stepped outside. “im sorry. i know you feel like youre stuck in a no win situation and im sorry. i dont expect you to swallow your pride and put up with that kind of thing, i really dont.”

slowly but surely nicola was beginning to realize that she didn’t have enough justification to win over either party in this case, they had reached a stalemate and whether anyone wanted it or not, she was right smack in the middle. “are you insinuating that he doesn’t have the right to be upset and protective?” after asking she held up her hand, “don’t even answer that, it doesn’t really matter.” in all honesty, it didn’t matter what anyone wanted, just because they wanted it didn’t mean it would be the end result and that was the most frustrating part. once downstairs in the study, the blonde hadn’t hesitated in laying into her father, much like the way he’d laid into her throughout her life. the two had gone at it back and forth for longer than they ever had in the past. until finally she came to her wits end, “dad, this is it, its enough. you can’t treat people like that! hes not some business associate that you can pick at until they quit. and if that’s what you’re going for, ill never forgive you. zayns my fiance, we’re getting married. its not up for debate. im a big girl, i know what i want and i know whats right for me. there isn’t anyone else out there for me. hes it, hes the one. so you’d better find it in you to suck it up, apologize for acting the way you did because you made yourself look like a heinous bastard, and assure us that it won’t happen again. and if you can’t do that then… then we’ll be gone and we won’t look back.” at the end, she hadn’t waited for his response, she had no desire to hear him out like he had moments before, mostly because knowing how stubborn he could be, she was terrified of the answer. stomping out of the room she made her way back upstairs. entering her bedroom without a word, she beelined for the bathroom, closing the door behind her and turning on the shower. rather than actually getting in, she was using it as a buffer incase a sob escaped her lips. sitting on the floor she leaned back against the counter and let out a shaky breath. she needed to get herself together before checking in on zayn. she started to wonder if, opposite of what her father thought, not that she could do better, but that he could. 

“Whatever,” she breathed out, trying to make it a slow breath to cool down her blood that felt like it was boiling by this point. All she continued to do was rack her brain for justifications about why her father acted the way he did, the same way she previously had to rack her brain to her father for why Zayn acted the way he did. It felt like one vicious circle that she couldn’t get out of. “He’s hurt because he saw how hurt I was by all of it. Because he knew how much fucking work I was putting into everything and how little fucking work you were putting in. Like you didn’t even care.” Of course her father had really only heard her side of the story which didn’t make his view fair. “I’m sorry that he doesn’t forgive and forget as easily as I do but I can’t change that.” God a Xanax would be nice right now. “Nothing. I don’t expect anything.” The truth of the matter was she didn’t know how to fix it and she hated when things were out of her control. “Fine.” Opening the door she made her exit, her legs carrying her down the steps two by two where she would ask her father to excuse himself to his study where the next screaming match would ensue.

“what’d you just say?” scoffing, the blonde whirled around to face him, a scowl taking over her features, “what’s that supposed to mean? what are you implying? that my father doesn’t love me enough to just look passed things that upset him?” maybe she was taking it the wrong way, or maybe that’s what she herself was thinking and using his statement as a chance to voice it. “so you’re being the bigger person, that’s a good thing. you should be proud of it.” crossing her arms, she shook her head, “you just said either im coming with you or im approving my fathers words so i said im coming with you, you’re my family, too.”

moving back into the room she rested her head back against the door, with the silent thought of banging her skull against it in frustration. “well its an upsetting situation,” she stated, trying to keep an even tone to her voice. “you can calm down and process your thoughts here. but you’re not walking out and ‘coming back later’” she lifted her fingers in air quotes. “so either we’re both staying or we’re both going. your choice.”

at the blonde’s change in tone, it took zayn back, the male reevaluating his words. his eyes shifted, his chest tightening with panic as she questioned him about what he meant. “no, i’m not saying that at all.” he defended himself, “i wasn’t implying anything like that, i know how much your father loves you and would do anything to guarantee your safety and happiness.” he finished deciding he’d be quiet. this argument could’ve been avoided, he knows this, however, it felt like such a far reach. he knew her next comment was sarcastic but he just took a deep breather, attempting to level himself. “i’m not trying to make you choose sides, and i realize that made it seem as if so...so i take it back.” he sighed.

“no I’m not! all im saying is i cant control what he thinks or does or says.” tilting her head she shot him a look, “I’m not entirely sure I believe that but I know that you’re far too stubborn to admit anything else.” whether she agreed with leaving or not, it seemed like his mind was made up, so she would start to repack what little she’d already taken out. “this is what you do when you don’t want to deal with things, you pull back and run away. but since we’re a team, i guess thats what we’re both doing.” she made an effort to finishing packing up what she had to without looking at him, her shoulders slumping slightly hearing him admit that he didnt care about fixing things with her father. at the moment she was feeling a range of emotions , hence one stray tear falling down her cheek that she abruptly wiped away. after pulling her bag into the hall she called out “mom, we’re going. ill call you later.”

“i get you can’t control it but his love for you should’ve done that.” zayn exclaimed as if it was obvious. “me being stubborn has nothing to do with anything.” he defended himself, “either way, i wouldn’t go out of my way to make someone feel uncomfortable in my home.” more than anything, that was the truth. zayn hated tension, and wouldn’t make an environment give off the feeling of stepping on egg shells. sitting on the edge of the bed as he threw his things back in his suitcase, zayn shook his head, “this is your family, nicola, you don’t have to agree or come with me.” he didn’t like hearing her call him out about how he deals with shit, it all became a harsh reality about himself and infuriated him more than he’d admit.  he wanted to feel like they were team, however it didn’t feel that way and watching nicola wipe what he assumes is tears from her face made him know as much.

Nicola never would have expected it to reach the degree it had. She didn’t typically see her father acting in such a manner unless it had something to do with business. Looking back and forth between the two of them she furrowed her brows and scoffed, “I’m trying to talk to both of you but that doesn’t seem to matter to either of you.” This was definitely what it felt like being stuck between a rock and a hard place, the expression now made more sense than it ever had before. Walking over to her mom she just shook her head “can you please talk some sense into him?” She looked at her dad “you need to fix this. Soon.” Letting out a sigh she followed behind zayn, she didn’t even know what to say it’s not like she could tell him not to take it personally, it clearly was personal. “I’m sorry.”

In all honesty Nicola really wasn’t expecting it to this degree at all. She knew that her family would start off a little standoffish but only because they were being defensive in her honor. The blonde assumed that once it was evident that it was far behind her and they were ready to move ahead that everyone would move on. “Dad!” Nicola hissed “enough already, you’re being petty.” Both of her hands moved through her hair as she breathed out a slow breath and shot her mom a look hoping that she would step in. Fighting with her parents wasn’t really something she did very often because as was becoming quite evident, her father had a way of trying to make people feel small and on her it typically worked. “Zayn, you can’t…” she was trailing off. How was she supposed to choose a side? Either way she would be letting down someone important to her “dad please don’t say things like that you’re not being fair, it’s not all his fault. We’re going to have our ups and downs just like everyone else.” Then she directed her attention to Zayn “can you take a breath? He’s just being protective he doesn’t mean it.”

Nicola has expected there to be a little bit of tension when they first arrived to spend time with her family. She figured that after a couple of hours things would just fall back into the comfortable vibe that had always been present. However she couldn’t have been more wrong. The situation was becoming increasingly uncomfortable because her father was being downright rude. After spending the remainder of the night apologizing to Zayn on top of trying to reassure him that it would get better, Nicola made sure to rise early to have a heart to heart with her dad. The only promise he made was to ‘try his best’ which to her wasn’t very promising at all.

A majority of the time was spent with Nicola giving Zayn a reassuring hand squeeze and then her making constant attempts at changing the subject. “Dad. Enough. We’ve moved passed it.” She looked at the older male with pleading eyes. The problem was that neither man tended to back down. Not in these kinds of situations where each felt they had a point to prove. “Stop, dad. We’ve both made mistakes no ones perfect. You can’t hold it against him forever.” Then she was tugging on her fiancés hand, “babe, sit.” She knew how her father reacted whenever someone tried challenging him, it never turned out well. When the sitting didn’t happen she stood as well, turning to look Zayn in the eye, “or let’s just go get some air.”

to say that zayn expected this would be an understatement. he didn’t think it would be a big deal. he had ended relationships for much crazier things, however, when he typically made up with the person afterwards it wasn’t as tough or tense as the house felt tonight. he knew he fucked up, he knew that he should’ve begged nicola for forgiveness earlier, but he came around eventually and that’s all that should matter...right? if zayn knew anything, he knew nicola didn’t deserve to be in the middle of this, she deserved more, however, nelson was her father and zayn was her fiance.