An Absolute Mess. Enjoy :)

none pizza with left beef

It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef

World Heritage Post

Together they create the full set.

tumblr black out poetry

like to charge, reblog to cast.

@pokeycub

Old people love to own two identical ugly as shit dogs

my brother’s grandma has been buying the exact same identical dog for like 60 years and naming each one boochie. I hate its immortal suffering.

WHWHAHAHAHAVEGEDHDHWHAHAHAHA

grandmas love to have complexes

Are we just ignoring the person that got hit by an electrical blast

She’s just doing it for attention

my ex’s grandmother did that with black standard poodles she named Precious and told no one that they were different dogs until one of her sons came by one day and noticed that Precious had suddenly become a puppy after 30 years

so she didn’t actually replace him with puppies bc that would be too obvious, she got younger dogs who were still old enough to pass as the previous dog and she had a habit of giving the dog makeovers (dying his grey hairs back to black , painting his nails etc bc “it’s good for his self esteem”) which made it less obvious when an older greying dog was replaced with a younger model. my uncle figures it out bc he moved back in with her to help take care of her and she couldn’t keep it from him when the dog switch happened

YOU DIDN’T TELL ME ABOUT THE DOG MAKEOVERS FHSHSH

Beste-glatisant’s ex got them with an electrical blast as well. Shocking post. Absolutely shocking. Stop reblogging to contain the voltage

Flshshfldlshdjkdkdjfhdhdfh

OK can someone call an electrician? I don’t think this post is up to code.

“my brother’s grandma” - who is she to you?? who is your brother to you???????

whoever made that post that's like "depressed people aren't listening to sad music they're listening to wild ones by flo rida at 7 in the morning" has ruined my life. sitting in my car outside work right now feeling like shit emotionally but at least hollaback girl is playing on the radio

this shit is bananas.

Jinkies

Jeepers!

Zoinks!

Ruh roh!

FUCK

My favorite part of this post is that it implies Fred is the one saying “FUCK” because we know who typically says the other 4 things

In all fairness, it is his van right?

The fabled post! Only ever seen screenshots!

Okay, I am really obsessed with this joke. I literally reblog it every time I see it.