i loveee the self aware tf2 stuff 𤤠you should make the reader be in a silly freaky relationship wit em đ
Team Fortress 2 Self-Aware AU: Nine For One, Girl
You giggled as you typed away on a chat site talking to the anonymous men behind the screen; biting your lip as he responded with sexual intent.Â
You had started visiting this porn chat a while ago because you really wanted to have some more excitement in your life. You didnât seem to have a routine outside of college, your part time job, helping your mom around the house, and playing TF2 in your downtime.Â
So far, any chat you joined in was a total waste. The men there were either way too pushy, had no idea what they were talking about, or worse, they saw themselves as Alpha males alreadyâeither because they were compensating for the pitiful excuse they had down there or alternatively, the big swollen dick that also gave them a swollen head. And not the correct one.Â
But mainly, none of them seemed to bring to life that spark within you. You didnât really had any kinks, but you have many fantasies over what you wanted to do with a willing partner. And well, none of them could simply give you that.Â
You were about to give up until you saw one single, innocuous text being sent to you.Â
DoubleBat:Â hey. got any free time?Â
You blinked, clicking on the text for the userâs information. They were apparently a very recent profile, but they were already part of a group chat.Â
That wasnât all too unusual as there were several group of friends who all signed up at the same time. You have actually overheard some of your classmates bragging about it once, though they didnât last very long when infighting began. Other times, group chats were started with the intention of having online gangbangs.Â
You didnât know if you wanted to join a group chat when you only ever had one on one conversations since joining the porn site, but this may as well could be the spark you were searching for.Â
So, your options weighted, you clicked on the text to answer back.Â
Accepting his invitation to join the group chat, you were quickly added to it where you saw how eight other members were already there and present. That was new, but wellâ they could be a very big group of friends or enthusiasts, so you didnât paid the unusually large number of people much mind.Â
The group chatâs profile pic was just a red circle and was apparently named Reliable Detonators. You couldnât help but snort at the cheesy but kinda funny title.Â
Afterwards, you found it polite to greet everyone else. That way, it could also serve to see if this group chat was worth your time or not.Â
PinkPrincess:Â hello everyoneÂ
youmakeitstandstraight: GREETINGS! [edited]Â
BanditBandaid:Â good eveningÂ
CowboyUp:Â ah shit. autocorrectÂ
DoubleBat:Â yo whatâs up?Â
You couldnât help but giggle reading all those introductory texts. Honestly, they felt less like a porn chat and more like a regular group chat between frat bros made for a school project.Â
With a smile, and nodding to yourself that maybe this time really will be different, you began texting again.Â
PinkPrincess:Â So, how you wanna do this?Â
PinkPrincess: any spicy ideas in mind? đđĽđĽľ
BanditBandaid:Â we were honestly hoping you could teach us the basics, actuallyÂ
ROSE:Â Indeed. None of us have done this before, you see.Â
CowboyUp:Â and well, you seem like a nice gal to talk withÂ
heavy duty:Â perhaps princess talk about herself first?Â
You blinked. You werenât expecting something like that. Usually, chats began with immediate intentions on starting with the sexual stuff. No one you have spoken with had actually paused to ask you about yourself first.Â
It was honestly very refreshing. And maybe⌠kinda hot, too?Â
DoubleBat:Â tho if u wanna start sending us sexy pics we r all in 4 dat đđđđđđ
DoubleBat:Â whaaaaaaat?! u cant tell me u donât want 2!Â
You laughed, because with anyone else, this kind of neediness wouldâve turned you off. But this time it was honestly kind of endearing.Â
So, with a smile, you texted again.Â
PinkPrincess:Â alright. What do you want to know?Â
youmakeitstandstraight:Â ANYTHING YOU WANT, MAGGOT!!Â
youmakeitstandstraight: ANYTHING YOU WANT!! [edited]Â
bombsaway:Â please forgive him. he is incredibly awkwardÂ
PissKink:Â bloke doesnât even know how to turn off his caps
PinkPrincess:Â itâs okay. I like it đ
PinkPrincess: Aww, thanks! Youâre so sweet! đĽšÂ
And thus, you began what had to be the weirdest, lengthiest yet most exciting chat conversation youâve ever had.Â
Much like they promised, the Reliable Detonators as you began to call them preferred learning more about you than anything else. You told them about your chosen degree, the dislikes you had over your part time job, and because you were feeling a little spicy, also some of your sexual fantasies.
Such as how you wouldnât really mind being with an older guy, but guys your age were just as good so long as they were cute and not an asshole.Â
Likewise, they began talking about themselves as wellâ though not much information. You understood, because after all, this was a porn site and they were talking to a random girl online. You would do the same in their shoes.Â
Getting to know all of the chatâs users was certainly an experience.
bombsaway was loud and, well, bombasticâ always the life of the party. He exchanged to you all the misadventures heâd done while drunk that left you in stitches, and you told him of the shenanigans that would happen at any house party your friends made you tag along to.Â
However, things soon began turning a little steamy when bombsaway began sharing lighthearted but undeniably dirty jokes, such as telling you how heâd let you handle his "sword" down there. You responded in turn that youâd use extra spit to make sure to leave it nice and shiny.Â
youmakeitstandstraight, like you were told about, was a little strange. Most of the texts he sent were written in caps as though he were shouting and immediately edited afterwards in order to try and smooth things over from any word that could cause a misunderstanding between the two of you.Â
He actually confessed that his username was picked by the rest of the chat because the names he had chosen were increasingly weird and out of place.Â
But other than that, youmakeitstandstraight was honestly pretty fun. One would except such an awkward man would have no idea how sexual innuendos worked, but they would be quickly mistaken.Â
youmakeitstandstraight was one of the dirtiest minds you have encountered. In fact, his given username was supposed to be a joke about how you made his "flagpole" stand straight.Â
While he never outwardly stated it, it seemed he had actually heavy exhibitionist kink as he often bragged about running around naked with nothing but dripping honey to cover himself. You licked your lips at the thought of a big, muscular man all gooey with thick, sweet honey pooling down his hardboard abs.Â
You later texted to youmakeitstandstraight if he would want to do the same but with chocolate syrup instead, and the guy once again went silent for five minutes before ranting that was an incredible idea.Â
ROSE, true to his presumptuous username written in full caps, described himself as a gentleman.Â
He wrote all his texts as if they were fancy letters, with full captions when needed and even punctuation marks. ROSE said he was a man of expensive taste, though he did show you a more vulnerable sideâ such as explaining how he wore gloves not just because it was distinguished but because he also had a habit to bite his nails whenever he was nervous.Â
That helped him not appear like a complete pompous asshole.Â
ROSEÂ was also by far the most experienced one inside the chat group when it came to erotic talk or innuendos. He spoke about the different types of dates heâs been on, but never enough to make it sound like he was bragging. More like relieving a pleasurable experience.Â
Honestly, you couldnât help but envy those women a little â except Marjorie. That MILF sounded nice â because you would love to be seduced by such a gentleman as well. You wondered what it would be like to tug him by the expensive tie he told you he wore, or if heâd let you hold it in your teeth provocatively.Â
When you told ROSE about it, he answered he had never done that before because he cared took much about his tie and feared coating it with someone elseâs salivaâ but admitted how the idea sounded very enticing.Â
BanditBandAid resembled ROSE a lot, but in a different way.Â
The guy certainly had a morbid mind as he began talking about how different parts of the body worked and what he could do to improve them. Or damage them. Or both.Â
It was a little shocking, but then againâ maybe he was just really into horror movies or other macabre stuff. You would be lying if you said you hadnât delved into that kind of stuff either, so when he asked you what you thought human eyeballs tasted like, you honestly answered how they probably were like grapes.Â
But he also had a more sensitive side, explaining he had multiple pet birds. And you, who had never had a pet growing up, instantly gushed over how cute that was.Â
And you had to describe BanditBandAid in one word, it would be absolute freak. That, or that he had awakened in you a new kink for doctor roleplay.
He detailed how he would strap you down to his operating table, completely naked, and ever so gently run the sharpness of his scalpel down your bodyâ teasing first your pert nipples into full hardness with the coldness of the metal before continuing down until he reached your pussy.Â
You physically couldnât hold back your moan after hearing that, and replied over how you could be his naughty nurse instead. After all, every doctor needed its assistant nurse, right?Â
BanditBandAid needed to edit his reply text at least three times.
Ember didnât talked much, only communicating via emojis. You honestly found it adorable, and often texted back in a similar fashion.Â
He said how they really liked your username as he loved both princesses and the color pink.Â
However, once in a while, Ember would send audio messages instead of text when things got steamy between you. The recordings were short and more than a little muffled, but you could just blame it on poor reception on his end.Â
It sounded like Ember was breathing heavily. You imagined that he were beating his meat as he talked to you, and you pictured it to be big and veiny by how much he was straining on the muffled audios.Â
So, playfully, you sent back a similar audio message of your soft moans as you played a little with your stimulated clit.Â
The entire chat went silent for several minutes, except for Ember who answered with a thumbs up emoji.Â
heavy duty didnât texted much, only sending short and minimal replies. Though, this was because he confessed he didnât spoke English very well and also didnât often used technology, which you could understand.Â
heavy duty often spoke about how much he loved his family back home, and how he also enjoyed literature in foreign languages. A man of culture, huh? You were honestly into that.
When you asked him if he lived up to his name, heavy duty assured you that he was indeed very big and strong. But because he was full of fat instead of other kind of muscles.Â
Although you never thought about it before, you actually preferred that over some super jacked gymbro. You told him how you would love to cuddle right next to him like if he were a teddy bear, right before he plowed you with his huge cock.Â
And yes, you were just certain that he was huge. heavy duty telling you himself that it would take both of your hands to completely cover his girth was every confirmation you needed.Â
PissKink was often quiet, sending short and minimal texts or the occasional GIF. But you could still tell that he was a nice guy, either when he scolded someone else when they texted something dumb or to make a sarcastic joke himself.Â
He didnât really revealed where did he came from â none of them did â but by the way he talked you guessed it was from somewhere like England. PissKink often talked about different exotic animals that he liked, and you two quickly became buddies by your shared love of coffee in the morning.Â
Though soon enough, you learned that for as much as an introvert as PissKink could be, he was a beast in bed.Â
He often talked how he could tail you from behind while you were on your hands and knees, fucking you brutally until the only thing you could do was whine and beg for more. Howâd he turn you into his little breeding bitch in heat. How you didnât need to be shy and could leave all sorts of marks on his body, because heâd certainly make sure you wouldnât leave without bites, nail marks and bruises.Â
You physically shook when you read all those messages, but that was nothing compared to what followed next.Â
Turns out, PissKinkâs username wasnât just for show. He genuinely got off seeing how much piss he could create, the smell and the nastiness of it.Â
PissKink promised he would make a show out of covering you with his thick, yellow urineâ showering your body with it like an animal marking its territory so that everyone will know that you belonged to him.Â
You were never really into urophilia, finding it a little gross. But PissKink had a way to made it sound exciting.Â
You were sure to send him lots of water and animal emojis to show your interest.Â
CowboyUp was by far the sweetest and most polite member of the group, often talking about your major and different foods you liked to eat or what you enjoyed doing in your free time.
He was also a big animal enthusiast, saying he came from a ranch down South and was surrounded by its rustic lifestyle.Â
That instantly got your attention as you had always found cowboys incredibly hot. You naughtily asked CowboyUp if he would wrap you up with his lasso, to which he answered in kind that he would tie you up and ride you like stallions do mares during in the breeding season.Â
Okay, so he definitely wasnât one of those modest southern boys who blush if you so much so as asked if you could kiss him, so you followed by asking if his cock was big enough for his hat to hang from, to which he just gave you a vague yet promising response that left you wanting more.Â
Finally, there was the guy that invited you in the first placeâ DoubleBat.Â
He was by far the most eager one of the group, often writing text lingo with little to no punctuation marksâ a fact that ROSE was heavily irritated by.Â
DoubleBat was similar to the guys you have seen all throughout the pornsite, full of self-grandeur and sending innuendos that didnât land very well. But somehow, you actually found them endearing instead of making you roll your eyes in annoyance.Â
Maybe it was because DoubleBat had a sweet personally underneath. He briefly talked about his mother and how much he loved her, or other passions he had like baseball and comics. And always  did apologized whenever he felt like he made you uncomfortable. The other guys you talked with wouldâve never done that.Â
That being said, there were moments where DoubleBat genuinely sounded quite sexy. He confidently texted over how his username was a play over how he carried two âbaseball batsââ the one in his hand, and the other? In his pants.Â
You then asked if he would like it if you played with his âbats and ballsâ, and he went quiet for a moment before sending you so many heart emojis which made you snort. It seems like DoubleBat wasnât used to girls actually flirting back to him, which you found incredibly adorable.Â
All of you kept on talking for what felt like hours, sending a mixture of a genuinely engaging conversation and absolute filth. Though, you couldnât help but feel that they were familiar somehow as if you have known them from beforeâŚ
And like you expected, they explained how they already knew each other as all of them were coworkers. All of them also confessed that, with the exception of DoubleBat, they were old enough to be your father. That thought further ignited something in you.Â
PinkPrincess: yeah? well, i just really love older men
CowboyUp: How old we talking, sweetheart?
You pressed your tongue to the roof of your mouth and thought; typing quickly.Â
PinkPrincess: depends how they like their girlsÂ
DoubleBat:Â asksgdfwubvshiiduwp!!
heavy duty:Â I like this oneÂ
BanditBandAid:Â Youâre in luck, my little one. We love naughty little girls like you.
ROSE:Â Correct. We would strip you down and toss you onto the bed, spank your bottom red then pick you up again to place you right on our tongues.Â
bombsaway:Â Eat your little cunt until it's swollen and my face is dripping from your cum and then I would pin you down onto the bedÂ
PissKink:Â Pound your pussy until you can only scream out Daddy, then maybe slip a finger or two in your tight little asshole.
Your face immediately turned red as you read the foul things this random gaggle of men typed, your panties completely soaked as you imagined them taking turns defiling you.Â
You swallowed hard with a grin and typed.
youmakeitstandstraight:Â CORRECT!!Â
DoubleBat:Â ill take real good care of u, baby đđđ
CowboyUp:Â show ya how a real man fucksÂ
ROSE:Â You would like that, would you not?Â
bombsaway:Â I would love to be your first real fuck, sweet girl
Your hand traveling down to your slick folds and playing with your clit ever so slightly. Soft moans escaping your mouth, as you typed back.
PinkPrincess:Â I haven't had sex before...
PissKink:Â Youâre a virgin, sheila?Â
youmakeitstandstraight: Thatâs sweet, I can take good care of you [edited]Â
BanditBandAid:Â Gentle, nice and slow. You want us to make you a woman?
You moaned softly as you played with your swollen bud as you read the older menâs (and sweet boyâs) messages.Â
Your heart was racing rabidly, your arousal growing as your fingers traced your needy clit.
heavy duty:Â Would princess like that?Â
DoubleBat:Â or do u want ur first time 2 be rough and dirty?Â
CowboyUp:Â Want me to grab that cute little ass of yours and squeeze it hard. Then I'm gonna push inside that tight virgin pussy and start pounding away?Â
Ember: đđđđđđđđ
Ember:Â [audio attached]Â
bombsaway:Â Sweet girl, you have no idea how badly I want to see you spread open and stuffed full of dick.
Your breath quickens as you read the strangersâ filthy words, your body trembling from your arousal. You began to slip down the straps of your nightgown to sent them a photo of your breastâŚ
âHoney, Iâm back!â Your momâs cheerful voice came from behind your door.Â
You quickly jolted out of your chair, shutting down your computer and then straightening your clothes.Â
âHi mom!â You cried, âDonât come in, please! Iâm getting dressed!âÂ
âAlright, sweetheart. Iâll go ahead and start preparing dinner, so you can join me once youâre ready.â Your mom said, then hummed a tune as you heard her shuffling away.Â
As soon as you heard her footsteps completely disappear down the hallway, you let out a huge sigh of relief and turned on your computer againâ showing you the chat right where you left it.Â
CowboyUp:Â Did we scare ya, pretty girl? with all of our dirty talk?
PinkPrincess:Â no, you didn't. My mom nearly came into the room
PinkPrincess:Â Maybe we should end things here?Â
BanditBandAid:Â Well, we have been talking for over two hours nowÂ
heavy duty:Â princess deserves sleepÂ
DoubleBat:Â yea ttyl babeÂ
youmakeitstandstraight: GOODBYE!! [edited]Â
PinkPrincess:Â bye everybody! It was great talking to you!Â
PinkPrincess:Â maybe next time we can take things further? đđđ
The amount of replies you received were overwhelming. You couldnât wait to talk to this group chat again!Â
And what you didnât know was that they were none other than the TF2 mercenaries, who had recently grown self-aware and now started contacting you through a special machine Engineer had buildâŚ
