Yume

I want to point out that while Ventus is more than likely speaking from past experience here, this also explains his thought process later on in BBS.

Ventus is scared. Vanitas led him to be scared of Terra changing, he's scared about his friend group dissipating after Radiant Garden, he's frustrated at how Terra and Aqua treat him as if he's less capable than them. All of that colors how he perceives the ways Terra and Aqua repeatedly brush him off.

Terra and Aqua care for him. So much. But it's hard for Ventus to see that, to see the reasoning behind their confusing and cold actions, when he's so scared himself and hurt by their actions.

And Ventus never gets the reassurance that he gives Snow White. Ventus puts her fears into perspective, but accompanies her anyways to further help her feel safe. When the trees do come to life, showing that her fears had basis, he keeps her safe then too.

Ventus himself? He doesn't even get the opportunity to tell Terra about his fears, he's constantly left alone with nothing said to him but an order to go home. His fears too have basis, and he gains so many more reasons to be fearful, and his Master tries to kill him for it.

He's empathetic, he's optimistic, he isn't easily swayed by the darkness. Except, he's bottling up his negative emotions in the way he sometimes evades serious conversations about his own personal feelings. How he's told not to change and that, of course, he's strong enough to get through all the pain and fix things.

Both allies and enemies need him so they use him, and yet he's also put down. He's just a delivery boy, he's just a pawn, he's just a puppet, he's just the next name down the list, he's just a dull and ordinary boy.

Don't worry, he'll forgive.

Don't worry, he won't remember.

Don't worry, he'd be willing to have his heart crushed to pieces to protect his loved ones.

And don't worry, he's more than happy to sacrifice himself repeatedly if he feels that there's no other way.

Except, he's just a kid. He struggles and gets affected by those words, those titles, the weight of a role that demands everything out of him and yet tells him he isn't enough. He wins because of love and spite, but those never go without consequence. He isn't the kind of hero that gets a happily ever after without having to pay the price.

Just something about how while Sora's strengths are, clearly, his strengths, it sometimes gets used to a point that it creates or pushes out the issues that come from letting him go unchecked, and yet oftentimes we see how both his allies and enemies benefit from his best bringing out the worst in him.

I don't know if I'm making sense, I'm just putting the Sora angst in the microwave of my brain...

~~~

like, a heart is your memories and experiences. you can grow a new heart, a heart can be damaged and fixed, a journal can grow a heart just based on the stuff written in it, data can have a heart, replicas can grow hearts. no one has less value because of how they came to exist, they just exist and their actions determine if they're good or not.

your value is hinged on who you are, not what you are. replika riku is treated as no less of a person because he was made to be a copy. xion is important, she's a person even if she wasn't originally made to be anything more than a doll. all the organization members, even if they pretended they didn't care or couldn't feel; even as most of them were villains, they were people. they laughed, they joked, they did stuff because they were curious, they were comrades even if it was just like,,, work friends for most of them.

Ven, the two of us need look no more

We both found what we were looking for

Five favs that I've written might be hard, considering I haven't posted that much.

Tales Of Little Pit (Kid Icarus)

Lucina’s Late Night (Super Smash Bros.)

Pokémon in: Omori (Pokémon. Omori)

Mega Man: Fully Charged - Season 2 (MegaMan)

Pokémon Sword and Shield rewrite (Pokémon)

Pokémon Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon rewrite (Pokémon)

May I Have this Dance? (Puyo Puyo, specifically Quest)

Shelter from the Rain (Puyo Puyo)

Morning Grace (Puyo Puyo)

Nothing to Worry About (Professor Layton)

She Could Have Been (Professor Layton) - Kat finds an old photo of Claire and wonders if she was her mother

Ready Now - (Professor Layton) - AU where Layton adopts Arianna and Tony after PL4

How To Save A Layton (Professor Layton) - AU where Randall and Henry rescue Layton and Luke much sooner

Desperate Times (Rhythm Thief) - Marie visits JF in prison in the hopes of finding Raphael.

Trust Earned (The Owl House) - Willow doesn’t trust Darius when he wants to speak to Hunter at Hexside

In your rearview mirror (Professor Layton) – AU where Aurora returns as a ghost that only Flora can interact with

To Blossom (Great Ace Attorney) – A character study of Susato from pre-canon through both games

Cry me a lake to drown you in (OMORI) – A character study of Aubrey in the aftermath of the good ending

Doctor I can’t tell if I’m not me (Sonic the Hedgehog) – AU where Sticks discovers Surge and Kit early

That Sun We Call Hope (Sonic the Hedgehog) - Silver character study

An Angry Heart For Those Millions Defenceless (Sonic the Hedgehog) - Amy whump where she fights Egg Pawns during Sonic Forces.

The Monsters Around Us (Hermitcraft SMP) - Fantasy/Royal AU with ex-assassins Cub and Scar traverse a dangerous forest, seeking shelter.

Joel’s Guide To Make Rational Decisions (and totally not facing the consequences of those decisions) (Life Series SMP) - Apocalypse AU where Joel and Etho survive a zombie attack.

But You Like That I Bite Back - (Sonic the Hedgehog) Scourge/Sonic/Shadow--- lesbian sonadow AU where they're killers and Scourge gets caught up in their hunt for the night by accident (and she has a great time. Mostly. 🔥)

Old Dogs Laughing and Snarling on a Waterbed Floor - (Sonic the Hedgehog) A Mouthwashing AU. Horror story. Unreliable narrator to the extreme. Was really fun to write out even if it was for an audience of two.

Favorite Liar - (Sonic the Hedgehog)- Fiona/Scourge. Exploration of Fiona's pov while she's cheating on Sonic. What can I say—I like a traumatized woman who has to choose between two worlds while she doesn't fit completely into either one.

I Will Show You Fear in a Handful of Dust - (Sonic the Hedgehog)- Sonic/Infinite. 2nd person. Exploration into Infinite's side of things after he captured Sonic and imprisoned him on the Death Egg. One shot from my YCBTV fic series.

A/Better/Offer - (Sonic the Hedgehog) An omegaverse fic where Shadow and Sonic both simultaneously take on undercover roles opposite to their presentations to attempt to de-platform underworld kingpin Infinite. Ensemble cast of Rouge, Knuckles, Amy, Tails appear as well. Multiple POV changes.

The Cowboy and His Knight - (Sonic the Hedgehog) Lancelot suddenly finds himself on a quest with a stranger that looks like his king. Sheriff Sonic tries to find his way home with a man that looks like his sworn nemesis, Erizo Sombrío. World expansion on SatBK and doppelganger tropes.

Burning Both Ends of the Night - (Sonic the Hedgehog) Side story following Sheriff Sonic's life before Camelot and how he came to meet Shadow the Hedgehog - notorious thief and outlaw. Kind of a passion project as I wanted to expound on Sheriff Sonic's backstory that I breadcrumb in TC&HK.

Spanish 101 - (Sonic the Hedgehog) Nicky has trouble keeping up with the material in his college sophomore Spanish class. Luckily, his TA Shadow offers private tutoring hours. A shorter one but it kicks off my series ' Hot for (kind of) Teacher' and was the first smut for smut's sake fic I've ever written.

The Devil and the Dead Sea - Pokemon, Hardenshipping (Archie/Maxie). This was the first fic I ever wrote so it's very special to me! Team Aqua and Team Magma must team up to reach the seafloor cavern and in the process Maxie must face his ~true feelings~ and they kissy and fall in love. Except Maxie is also super anggy and repressed and wants to deny that's happening. Neither Team Magma nor Team Aqua are very happy about this and antics ensue.

Exile//Vilify - Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity, Astor gen fic. Astor is raised in a cult that worships Fate and grapples with a prophecy that states one day he will face exile and devote his life to Calamity Ganon. He becomes the royal seer and there's definitely some underlying romantic tension between him and Zelda's mom, the queen of Hyrule. It's basically Astor's origin story, and I made a lot of friends though it. (Astor cult rise up).

Ophelia and the King's Madness - Pokemon, Colress/Concordia. This one is basically done but I've posted very little of it, so all I have is the little preview. (I should really get to posting it soon). Colress helps deprogram Concordia out of her cult by smuggling her candies and little treats (and also seducing her). It's part sexual awakening, part religious trauma, very many parts just Colress being a scumbag piece of shit and eating fruit. it's a wake-up-call, loss-of-innocence story as Concordia slowly discovers who he really is.

Prophecies to Waterfowl - Gen fic, Astor & King Rhoam. I don't know I just really like this fic, okay? It takes place during the unwritten portions of Exile//Vilify in which King Rhoam awkwardly tries to extend an olive branch to Astor (at the encouragement of his wife). I think I like it because they're so antagonistic to each other in E//V, but this fic shows there were attempts to be amicable, and some of those attempts were semi-successful. It also kind of plays with Astor and King Rhoam's very different ideas of prophecy.

Trouble Will Find Me - Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity/Breath of the Wild/Exile//Vilify universe. Gen fic, slightly-romantic-undertones prequel to Exile//Vilify that focuses on two of Astor's mentors from E//V and how they got to where they were. Especially because one of them knows he's doomed to die from the start. It's the backstory for Thelem, Astor's mentor, my favorite OC ever, and that one too I really need to start posting more of.

This was a good check-in. I need to start posting more again 😅 get these things outta my drafts folder

Warm Milk and the End of the World - Majora's Mask. I wrote this for Homemade in Hyrule vol. 2, a LOZ series cookbook zine; the digital-only side zine, specifically, which had fics centered around food in the series. As you might guess from the title, it's from the perspective of Cremia as she struggles to keep things together for Romani's sake, on what she thinks will be the last night of their lives (and all of Termina). I'm just really happy with how this one came out, the emotions I hit in it, and I think it might be my favorite zine piece of all the ones I've done so far.

The Legend of Zelda: The Ghosts of Yesterday - Original Legend, taking place in a Hyrule I created by cobbling together pieces of all the others. I wanted to explore what it would really look like if the reincarnation theory and Demise's Curse were real things that affected the world, and how messed up it could potentially be for everyone involved (aka, the entire world, really), and what things would look like if that cycle got broken if the chief players got tired of it playing out. I love stories that take place well after apocalyptic events, like Wind Waker and Adventure Time, and stories about breaking cycles that aren't healthy for the world, so I wanted to delve deep into that and a ton of other ideas and concepts floating around in my head. I've only posted a few chapters so far, but I'm REALLY enjoying this one.

Song of a Champion - Breath of the Wild. My half a million word long retelling of BOTW, with Mipha as the protagonist instead of Link. It was based on the Mipha's Grace mod that lets you play as her--seeing some of it streamed in Discord lit a spark in me, and it took me two years to see the story through to completion. Remains one of my proudest achievements.

Winter's Moon - Breath of the Wild/Age of Calamity, other assorted LOZ games. It's older than my other entries on this list, but I still love it and look back fondly on writing it. It's an amalgamation of various characters and places from the series, put together for the purpose of retelling East of the Sun and West of the Moon in a more modernized (but still fantasy!) setting. I had so much fun writing it, and it'll always be super special to me (especially because it started my addiction to writing Mipha as a protagonist going on adventures).

Hallowed Evening - BOTW/AOC. It was between this and a couple other entries I did for Miphlink Week 2022, a year in which I was apparently ON FIRE creatively for that ship. Anyway, this one was a retelling of Tam Lin, a very very formative and influential folktale/ballad. I think reading it at a young age was part of what got me so deeply enamored of narratives where the heroine saves the hero, instead of the much more common one of heroes saving damsels in distress. Only makes sense that I would eventually find a way to do a Miphlink version!

A Spilling of the Heart - Kingdom Hearts. this is my favorite fic I've ever written! it's about Strelitzia being aromantic and both the difficulty and joy that being aro brings

On the Shores of Destiny - Kingdom Hearts. my finished longfic! Repliku Lives AU where he meets Kairi and struggles with being a real person. this has been so much fun to write and it's made me adore Repliku and Kairi friendship. I'm currently working on the sequel!

Lost Heart and Weary Soul - Kingdom Hearts. the immediate aftermath of Luxu getting Nobody'd. Guy who's identity has been a heart stealing other people's bodies suddenly loses his heart and has an identity crises about it. he makes me unwell (affectionate)

Twilight's Flight - Twilight Princess. I just updated this one today! AU where the Resistance actually gets to meet Midna and learn about the twilight invasion.

Hearts in Grayscale - Kingdom Hearts. ongoing multichapter fic exploring grayaroace Roxas with queerplatonic Roxas/Naminé/Xion. my fav ship but make aspec!

Seeds of Friendship - (Kingdom Hearts). My favorite fic I’ve written so far! Roxas looks back on the most significant moments of his friendship with Ven, from their first real conversation to when he realizes Ven has become one of his closest friends and he can’t bear to lose him. 

Missing Pieces - (Kingdom Hearts). When the memories of his past start to resurface, Ventus struggles under their burden alone until he can’t do it anymore. It’s technically connected to Seeds of Friendship, but can work just as fine as a standalone. Between the fics I wrote, this is the one I reread the most, so it deserved to be on the podium.

Echo of Ache - (Kingdom Hearts). Ven and Roxas go on a trip to Disney Town to take Roxas’ mind off his worries about his friends acting strange lately. Everything goes well until Roxas finds out Ven is also hiding something from him. 

Mending Heart - (Kingdom Hearts). Sora is struggling under all the pressure put on his shoulders and his lack of self-esteem, but Roxas and Ven realize something is wrong and comfort him.

By your side - (Kingdom Hearts). This one will always have a special place in my heart, simply because it’s the fic that brought me back into writing and taught me how much I love it. It’s a modern AU where Ven accidentally sees Roxas on television and believes he might be his long lost twin.

I’m alive~ here to share drawings I’ve done of the blorbos for an RP I do with a really good friend!