Trailer Park Boys (pt. 2) meme
WARNING: NSFW, Drug cw & offensive language
Change pronouns to fit your muse!
“It looks like a tropical earthquake blew through here.”
“Survival of the fitness, boys.”
“It’s the old: ‘keep your friends close to get your enemy’s toaster.‘”
“I’ll just be in my shed hyperventilating.”
“He grew up as a little shit spark from the shit flint, and then he turned into a shit bonfire.”
“He kinda freaked out and threw a turkey, but it’s like… anyone would have done that.”
“When I was young I did all kinds of crazy shit, and I turned out wicked.”
“All I did was call him a ‘big mustard tiger’ I mean he had a big tiger on his t-shirt and he was all covered in mustard.”
“All of a sudden he snaps and starts smashing ___’s car with a ladder.”
“I’m not a pessimist, I’m an optometrist.”
“I assure you that kids throwing bottles and trying to sell crack here, is not a normal occurrence.”
“It’s not all your fault. But 90%.”
“What kind of cop lets a man with no shirt and no pants into his police cruiser?”
“He’s basically a squatter, and he does throw a lot of piss jugs around… nobody enjoys those.”
“Thats the lowest I’ve ever seen him: drunk on swish, dancing around with an old fucking dirty dog, eating pizza crusts off the ground… ”
“Carpenters, electricians, dishwashers, floor-cleaners, lawyers, doctors, fucking politicians, people who paint the lines on the roads: get stoned. It’ll be fun. Get to work.”
“Once I get drunk, I don’t give a fuck. I just start singing.”
“Government buildings are so easy to rob. You can walk in there in broad daylight and take everything, and no one even says anything.”
“Stop fucking calling me, I got no dope.”
“I want a boner made of love.”
“I can’t go to jail, who’s gonna look after my kitties??”
“Basically, I need cats to look after my weed plants.”
“Lost all the liquor money, that’s the way she goes.”
“You’re prostituting yourself for cheeseburgers again, aren’t you?”
“And I promise to love you as much as I can, and as often as I can, under the circumstances.”
“This night shouldn’t be about dope and swearing.”
“What, you think you’re the only guy to have his cock bitten by a snake?”
“It takes all his mental abilities to cook something. I’ve seen him get pulled into a trance by bacon sizzling.”
“How the fuck can a peanut kill someone? It’s not even a person. That’s fucked.”
“Get a hold of your child, ____. You’re a wack dad/mom!”
“I mean, how many fathers can give their 9 year old daughter a car?”
“All the credit cards are maxed out in your name but I threw them in the fucking lake, so they can’t trace that shit back to you.”
“GET GOING YOU SON OF A WHOOOORE!”
“Some guys can drink and drive, some guys can’t. What IS ‘drunk?’”
“We might have to fight this guy, so whatever you do, don’t look at his gut.”
“I’m not saying I have a problem. But if I did have a problem, maybe it would be alcoholism.”
“Tell me you two didn’t just break up over some bacon?”
“You alright? I don’t give a fuck, actually.”
“My first order of business is to tell the prosecutor to shut the fuck up and wipe that stupid grin off his face.”
“Don’t tell anyone I’m living in the dump, okay?”
“My fucking thoughts have feelings of their own too, sometimes.”
“Real men don’t try and electrocute other men’s cocks when they’re taking a piss!!”
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