Tina

What if Cain asked God to help him do what’s right instead of sitting in his anger?  What if Eve submitted to Adam instead of listening to the snake?  What if God’s way is truly better than my own?  What if I was actually made for such a time as this? That God has pulled the strings of fate and destiny so that I am where exactly He wants me to be.  What if I am truly known by my Heavenly…

Look up to the mountains tops, The voices are singing songs of victory. The road has been long and difficult. Your feet are bleeding and your muscles are weak.  But look up to the mountains tops Your promises are waiting. Yes, there is another hill to climb. Another corner to round.You are not quite there yet. But you are so close… keep going. Look up my child,  Not just to the mountains…

It’s the scandalous name of Jesus we worship.It the man that was conceived out of wedlock.The bastard. The man that choose to eat with the tax collectors.To speak to those outcasted because of disease. Every page of the gospels tells us how Jesus was scandalous.Flipping tables.Talking about drinking his blood and eating his flesh.Speaking against religious leaders. And we know that God is the…

I don’t need you to build my church. Nor do I need you to lead my sheep.I don’t need you to feed the poor. Or look after the widow. Have you lost sight of who I am?I am the God who cleanse the world with a flood.I am the God that sent the 7 plagues. I am the God that used a donkey to send a message. I don’t need you. I chose you. I chose you to build my church. I chose you to lead my sheep. I…

It’s odd being back. A place so familiar. A place so known. A place so dark. You chest tightens as you pull in. You think it always had. You just never realised before. Because you never knew peace then. It’s odd being back. A place that moulded you. A place where your career started. A place that taught you how to fight. You see the echoes of your old self. The one plagued with self…

Every year I hope that this year will be different. After all, it’s another year later. Another 12 months between me and the day I loss my dad. 52 more weeks of memories where he has not featured. 365 days of decisions made and he was not consulted. Day to day, 9 years is a long time. I found my new normal after his death… and had to find my new normal a couple more times as life continues…

They say I am confident That I have made a difference. They say I am strong. They say I am part of the family. I feel like a circus actThat no one will ever loveI feel broken, unfixable I feel different from the crowd They say be a leader. That’s what I am called to be. They say there is space to be you, Run! There's no obstacles in your way. I feel so alone, Never really seen or heard. I feel…

To be a hugged by the Father,That’s a healing embrace To be loved by the Father,I’ll never be the same. He is there, He is waiting, He is longing. Longing to hear about my day, the good and the bad.Longing to help me, to set me free.Longing to be my confidant, my helper, my Father. But am I willing? Willing to let go of my past and believe the inconceivable.To let go of the identity I have…

I was driving home this evening and jaming to “I will survive.” And I sang the line, a line I sang so many times, but for some reason, it hit differently. “As long as I know how to love, I know I’ll stay alive.” I thought about all the times I was hurt. There have been times when my voice was never heard in the room. There were times when I was made to feel unqualified irrespective of the title…

It wasn’t the times you sat with me while I cried. Nor the number of times you fed me. It wasn’t your wisdom or joy. Or the fact you could make macaroons from scratch. These are qualities that society admires in friends. You are so wise, you were there when I most needed you, you light up the room when you enter. Yes, these are true but they are not the things that changed me. It is your…

The problem of being a strong independent woman.

I was raised by an incredibly strong woman. She taught me everything I needed to know about life. If I get a flat tire, I get my hands dirty and change it. If my washing machine trips the electricity, I go to the electric box, flips the switch and check what is faulty. I am such a strong independent woman that when I packed up my flat to move into my new home, I did it myself. My brother carried…

When someone you love passes away, doing something for the first time without them is always hard. The first morning you wake up without them. The first Christmas without them. Your first birthday without them. At the beginning these first are happening in quick concessions, you are just overwhelmed with emotions. Doing something that they always been around for, without them, is always a shock…

Wait For it…

A friend recently ask me ‘What does it mean to you when you read’ If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me’. As we were talking about laying aside your wants for a better life – it reminded myself of this blog I wrote early last year which I have been to scared to post.

As I take a moment, I can’t help but wonder how I came to this point.

What? I can learn life lessons anywhere.

For those of you who are unaware, vLookup is a function in Excel. It allows you to look up a data point in a different table to return a different data point. If you didn’t understand that, it’s okay. It’s not essential to my point.

My point was I needed to run a vLookup function on a set of data. This would save me manually categorizing 450…

“Please don’t die”

This was my single request to my sister who is a doctor working at a COVID-19 field hospital.

As the Western Cape is rapidly reaching the peak of our infections, the reality of COVID has come closer to home. My sister comes home and tells me the heartbreaking stories about the patients from the field hospital. About how family members are reaching out to their loved ones but there are no hands…

How do I describe to someone on a Monday, the reason I am not eating for the day? How do I politely wrap everything in a bow and present them a pretty picture.

How do I describe the heartache of loosing my dad, my dream and career within 5 months where the only thing kept me together is God’s grace and love?

How do I explain to you that once I feared failure to such a point that I fear to…

This Little Light of Mine

I’m gonna let it shine, this little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine.

If you ever went to Sunday school or a primary school that still sang hymns, you would know the song above. This use to be a massive hit in our Monday morning assembly when I was growing up and I always thought I understood…