Sometimes I get so embarrassed remembering how Sherlock’s show-off urges include showing off the fact that John hangs out with him. Like as soon as Sherlock shows up anywhere he’s like, “Hello, this man is WITH ME, did everyone hear that? He is my colleague, my friend, my partner; he is FAMILY so if you want to say something to ME you have to say it to HIM because we are ALWAYS TOGETHER. He thinks my life is worth preserving, so JOT THAT DOWN. He is NOT an old man with a mustache that ages him; his RATIOS are IDEAL and he WALKS like THAT for the REASON YOU THINK. He is PERFECT at everything and he chooses to spend his time being OBSESSED with me, so everyone who has ever doubted or criticized me can EAT SHIT. THIS is the caliber of person I attract, and I have ZERO need for ANY of you or ANY of your compliments because you could NEVER understand how little they mean compared to the ones I get — CONSTANTLY! — from this outstanding man.”
And everyone is always like “uh okay sure, anyway here’s the body we called you about”
