Y.A.N.A.

Some days I wake up and I think to myself "why am I here?" I try to smile and go about me day, but it does not work all the time. Some days I want to cry. Some days I just want to be held and told "Don't worry, everything will be okay." Don't we all? We all cry, weither it's from stress, fear, or just pure joy, we all cry. Crying is not something that should be held back. I remeber months ago when someone close to me left, I did not cry for a while. I held back my tears as I watched evryone I know cry. Some cried harder than others. I just stood there, watching. When I got home that night, I still could not cry. The realization that they where gone had not really sunken in. "It's okay, she'll come home tomorrow!" No, it was a lie. I knew better than to think that. Then finally, three months later, I couldn't keep it up any longer and I never cried so hard in my life. I used to think life would be useless without her, but now, I live everyday thinking of her. I loved her so much and I always wish we had more time together. You can't live in the past though, she is gone, and I have to accept that. Everyday I think about her, everyday I wonder "if she saw me now, what would she think?" Because of that, I know I cannot turn down the wrong path. I have to keep doing what I know is right and make her proud to call me her child.

So today I sat in my room all day with nothing to do. As I sat there I thought to myself "somewhere in the world, something more interesting than this is happening." I assumed all my friends where doing something more interesting than me. I assumed even the ant that crawled over my PB&J sandwich today durring my family BBQ was doing something more productive than me. However, I realized after a while, even if I am not doing anything special or important, it really doesn't matter. A day where I can just sit back, relax , and say "Hey, I did nothing today" is very rare. Today I learned it is good to have these days where I can just smile and forget my problems.

I do not know who said that, but it is very true. We all have problems. We all deal with them in different ways. However, do not let your emotions get the best of you. Need a shoulder to cry on once in a while? Tell someone. Something horrible happen and you just don't know how to deal with it? Jut tell someone you know will listen. Their will always be someone that cares about you, just sometimes they might be a bit hard to find. Everyone has problms, but you do not have to deal with them alone.

the most common mental illnesses are anxiety and depression.

I believe that you should be open with your feelings towards others, it makes dealing with problems a lot easier.