Do U Know If LovExists?

I know how you drip

When I whisper

Those bad names

In your ear while in public.

Can I take my finger now?

You drove my head

To the midst of your legs

And made me taste your water.

Oh! Holy water!

You control my actions

And drive my desire

Made me forget all notions

Set my life on fire.

One day we met.

Just like that, we met.

We both knew what would happen next.

We both wanted. So we just met.

You were nervous. Very nervous.

I thought maybe it would be better if I should just leave.

But you really wanted it so you invited me to see the view from the balcony.

That was the nicest excuse to break the ice.

And in a few moments we found together a new reason to live.

We found... Harmony! The harmony that led to what came next.

You laid on the bed. I undressed.

I wanted to have you but... that we would come to this? That I never thought.

None of us was expecting this.

We had some quick loving moments. Moments we never forgot.

How could we? Even if meeting again was then so desired but not quite to expect.

After that, contact was made almost every day.

Increasing in time and frequency. In ways and will.

I got caught in love for You without ever wanting to.

You got in without even planning how.

Everything was too fast.

And everything was too good.

So we met again. Still shy. Still slow. And we understood how really good it was to be together.

And again. And again... Until just meeting was not enough.

And here we are now.

In a pandemic world, living apart, connected by Love.

Craving for a future knowing how good was our past.

Learning about each other. Even about how to turn each other's mood.

Living to die in a Love Forever.

Dying to live a Life Together.

Tonight I am crying

Because I'm in love

Because I am missing

So not to feel like I am dying

Tonight I am crying

I was given the best gift

Life could've ever given to me

But then they pulled us apart

So I'm now feeling adrift

Because of the love that I miss

And as I am tired of sighing

Too tired to shout

I'm letting all out

So tonight I'm crying

I heard that men don't cry

What a stupid thing to say

When a man is feeling down

Having any other bad day

Should he just stand, keep it up

Let himself crouch down and die?

Why can't he just cry?

Especially if he's tired of trying and trying

So tonight I AM crying

Tonight I am letting myself cry

Because I miss the one that I love

Tomorrow will be another day

And maybe my spirit will again fly

Maybe this sadness will go away

Maybe my Love will return

Or I'll just go back to sighing

But silencing inside this love

Is something that I will never learn

Thinking about you. About US.

On how difficult this all is for both and each of US.

How a "small" distance that used to be covered in just an hour before the pandemic, now seems a huge mileage trip to the other side of the World.

How easy this would have been before.

It would enable US to be together and travel back and forward so easily.

Now, it has been months since we have been together in person.

I miss the touch.

Miss the smile.

Miss the personal interaction.

Miss the scent. Miss the taste. Miss the look of you when you're not looking.

I miss your every fraction. In the present moment. In the past. In the planned future.

Miss to appreciate your grace and lightness whenever you walk with a smile on your face.

Miss the end of the fights when we would almost spank and bite each other on that neverending hungry way punish the flesh and possess the soul. Those bites!!!...

Miss your hair in my fingers.

Miss my fingers on you and in you.

Miss your moan.

Miss to go places with you by my side.

Miss to play your clown in public and go crazy wherever. Whenever...

Miss you in the bed.

Miss you around the house. Miss you here. Miss you there. Miss you everywhere.

Miss to fight with you like cat and mouse.

Our fights have made me think so many times that we were wrong.

But our moments made me feel even more how right we are.

Miss our plans together. Miss our ideas. And the things we do so to not feel so far.

I love you and everything about you.

I love myself when I am with you.

Miss being red, yellow, green, shiny bright colours and not just blue.

I love US more than anything else.

Our dreams are still inside of me.

They will always be.

They were not for yesterday, I must say it with sorrow.

Seems not also for today.

But I believe they will be true tomorrow

Or any other day. And the one after. And the one after. And the one after that.

A book with a never-ending happy chapter.

I keep believing.

I keep loving.

I keep dreaming.

I keep fighting. Because to stop fighting for the true love of my life is to die. And I don't want to die.

I still want to live. I still want to love. YOU. With YOU. Many many happy years.

I never felt I was so much

Until I finally lost everything

You drove me here

So I have to thank You

For Your "magic touch"

That turned my cold harsh winter

https://link.medium.com/ni5wizApNib

... And the night settled

Showering colours into the darkness

It didn't rest my ghosts

It's really ironical that right after dealing so close with death I finally found in You My Reason to Live.

Karma is such...