n

masterlist

♡ genre: fluff 

♡ pairing: xiao dejun x reader

“Do you think that stars have feelings?” You turned your head to look at your boyfriend, a small laugh leaving his lips as he shifted his head to face you.

“Now what kind of question is that?” Xiaojun was smiling at you, a look of pure adoration written clearly across his features. You shrugged before pulling your jacket closer around you, a slight chill running through your body as you let out a shaky breath.

Taking note of your current state, Xiaojun sat up on the small blanket the two of you had laid out on the field and shrugged his jacket off before carefully placing it over you. 

“You’re gonna be cold though,” you whined, propping yourself up on your elbows with a pout as you began to take his jacket off your shoulders. 

“I won’t get cold, trust me. I don’t want you to get cold though because that’s more important.” His voice was gentle as he brought a hand up to stop you from taking it off. The look on his face was stern but his eyes were soft causing you to let out a sigh of defeat. Pulling the jacket back over your shoulders, you shifted yourself closer to Xiaojun as he warmly welcomed you against his side.

The two of you laid in silence with only the faint glow of the moonlight to illuminate your features, your hands intertwined tightly as the stars shined above you. Glancing over at your boyfriend, you took a second to admire him before he suddenly met your gaze. 

You felt a faint bubble of joy burst as you let out a small chuckle before leaning in and pressing your nose gently against his in an Eskimo kiss. Xiaojun smiled softly as he pressed further, your foreheads barely grazing each other before letting out a breathy sigh.

Xiaojun + “I’m glad I get to spend the holidays with you.” + “Happy New Year, baby. I can’t wait to spend another year with you.”

You blindly shove your key into your front door, tugging at it until the door unlocks and lets you into your apartment. Xiaojun stumbles in after you and something like a giggle leaves his lips as he helps you take off your shoes and your coat, wrapping his arm around your waist as he leads you into your bedroom. Despite the heavy feeling in your head and the urge to fall into bed and pass out, you pull Xiaojun into the bathroom with you and hand him his make up remover.

“No, let’s go to sleep. We can do this in the morning.” You lazily yank him back by the edge of his shirt and turn on the water in the sink, forcing his head down to signal him to shut up and wash his face. He laughs but compiles; Xiaojun is a giggly drunk.

It isn’t until after you’ve washed your faces, brushed your teeth, and changed into your pajamas that Xiaojun finally gets his wish; he falls into your soft bed, almost passing out at the feeling of the silk pillow case against his cheek.

The time on the clock that sits on your bedside table reads 4:11am and it keeps Xiaojun from completely falling asleep. It’s a new year, and you and Xiaojun have already spent the first four hours of it so drunk that you might not recover until January 3rd. Xiaojun smiles again; he wouldn’t have it any other way, as long as he gets to do it all with you.

“What’s the smile for?” You ask, yawning and slipping under the covers next to him.

“I’m glad I get to spend the holidays with you.”

“I don’t think you’ll be saying that tomorrow morning when you wake up puking.”

“I’m serious.” Xiaojun laughs and shimmies closer to you, weaving his leg through yours and wrapping an arm around your waist to tug you into his side. “This year has been different with you in it. The holidays seem different, more meaningful and fulfilling. Am I even making sense right now?” You both laugh at Xiaojun’s drunk rambling, but through all the haziness that covers your head, you know his words are true and that he’s sincere.

“Happy New Year, baby. I can’t wait to spend another year with you.” You mumble into his collarbone, and it finally seems like the two of you will settle down after a whole night of partying and celebration.

[ 23 : 45 ]

after shutting off his laptop, once you two had finished watching ponyo, dejun pulled the blanket up to his lip and closed his eyes. but after not hearing any rustling from you up on his bed, they slowly opened once more to see what you were doing. tonight you were having a sleepover round dejun's house, and were sleeping in his bed — which he had given up, i swear! — whilst he had curled up on a blown-up mattress on the floor. the only problem being; you weren't having it.

a dramatic sigh filled the room. "i get that you're sleeping on the floor, but why can't you sleep on the bed too?" you asked, your pout audible despite the room being quite pitch black. "you'll hurt your back on the floor."

blow-up mattresses, and you knew, were comfortable enough to not earn a back ache during the night. still, you felt bad for being able to have dejun's rather-large-for-one-person-bed all to yourself this time, with the soft blankets and darth vader build-a-bear you had made for him on your second date.

you two had only been dating for a few months, and had yet to share a bed; the fact he was sleeping on the floor still made you feel bad, but you were also excited to sleep in the same bed together for the first time. if only dejun would actually move onto the bed.

with a soft sigh, you shuffled closer to the edge of the bed and reached out into the darkness, hoping to brush the tips of your fingers against something belonging to your boyfriend. your plan was, if he wasn't to move himself, you would. after feeling the same fuzzy texture against your fingertips as dejun's pyjama shirt, you shuffled closer to the edge; your fingers returned to the soft material of your partner's shirt.

"is that your arm?" you asked. to which no response. your fingers tapped against the material. "dejun, is that your arm?"

judging by the way his calm breathing that had once filled the bedroom could no longer be heard, your boyfriend was desperately trying not to laugh. a scoff ripped from your throat as you wrapped your hand around what you were sure was dejun's arm (and you were correct, you realised, once you had taken into consideration the shape of it).

your other hand reached down to help (try to) pull him onto the bed, and you were unsure whether you were weak, or dejun was strong, because he wouldn't budge a bit.

"please!" you whined, pulling away from his arm and retreating back to your old position on your back. you crossed your arms in defeat. "and if you're not here with me during the night, i'll get cold."

@yangcaffeine @kpophours @vicapuleti @cyndaquizzical @atiny-piratequeen @atiny-dazzlinglight @gettin-a-lil-hanse @jacksons-goddess-gaia @kimnamshiks @not-majestic-bluenicorn @daybreakx @justasouthernlady @jaeyooniverse

@yunhofingers thank you🥺🥺🥺🥺💗💗💗🧡🧡🧡

@rinzyk @beyoncesdragon @twancingyunhoe @softforqiankun @vibratingearthquake @mingination @djxiao @miniaturealienllamahumanoid @angeljinnie @electronicgentlemencrusade @char-slander @atiny-ahgase @sangie-baby-deactivated20201219 (I miss you Mari🥺 I hope you’re @yunhofingers) @cometoceantrenches @saebaragi @oddlittlefandomist @yutayakiii @lucaswithnoshirt @fadingsaladcheesecake @astronautke @wonpeeler @toulousekitty @theclawofsa @resilientpoet @keytomythoughts , all my moots, I love y'all

@renjunes @wonmomo @jenanimus @simp-for-kpop @xuxisvlog @nayuvenus @wayvessel @bubbleteabtch @jaehyunniemylove

I love you all so so much 🥺❤

Ooohhhh 👀👀

My lockscreen~ 😌💖

i must have a wild future cuz my lockscreen is a moving lockscreen with CNCO, Chenle and WayV 💀

movie tag 🎞

tagged by @myunqho !! thank you gabi 🥰

rules: you’re starring in a movie with the last person you saved in your camera roll and the last song you listened to is the title. who/what is it?

and what a coincidence-

omfg 😳 i’m sold

(Sorry for the shitty screenshot; it’s Cardigan by Taylor Swift)

I mean… It could work.

Oooohhhh… Thank you for the taggg uwuwuuw

BYE MEKWMOSHDOWNWLQ

i’m so sorry jay PLS I SWEAR I LVOE U LMFAOOOO

also thanks for tagging me @soft-black-teabag and @bluejayjay ❤️

yeah im not complaining :D

i mean… i’m down 👀

Also can I just say Woodz AND AB6IX? The iconacity 👌

Bought to have a sad ending 100% 🙃

(*⁰▿⁰*)

And can I just say…TAEYONG I- 👀👀

Y'all are up! @simp-for-kpop @jenanimus @officiallyt92 @renjunes @taeyongssi

okay i actually really like this 😳🤍

thanks for the tag love @keytomythoughts

tagged by @renjunes

tagged by @wayvessel !

ohp guess i'm thirdwheeling xiaotaro *scratches head*

➵ your subconscious clinginess shows just a bit more in the morning

  he glanced over to your bare body sleeping peacefully within the satin sheets, glowing in the light of dawn. he smiled in all of his morning glory at your beauty, still tired though forcing himself awake in order to get the morning going for his person.

  he attempted to shimmy his way out of the sheets with ease, hoping not to disturb your peaceful sleep. slowly lifting the fabric, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and placed his hands on either side of him, knuckles digging into the mattress. his feet graced the floor, easing his way off the bed until he felt two fingertips softly graze his wrist. he turned his head to look at you, who was lazily reaching for him. though, your eyes were glued shut, seemingly still fully asleep.

  the tips of your fingers were akin to ice against his skin, ultimately sending a shiver through Xiaojun. his gaze was trapped upon your captivating figure hugged by the sheets just right. his fingers reaching to brush the strand of hair away from your eyes, hesitating for a mere instant as he didn’t want to wake you. the dormant, thoughtless part of his brain propelled his hand forward.

  “Jun,” you spoke. soft, delicate, fragile as the lazy portion of his name slid off your lips. there was no telling if you were one with consciousness as your eyes still had not yet opened to the morning glare. “where are you going?”

  he sat wondering if he really needed to kickstart the morning straight away, or if he should succumb to the temptations of your cold skin and your faint melodies.

  with his love abundant and his admiration apparent, he knows in his heart what the clear step is to take. slip back into the covers and bear hug his lover until you wake up.

-

He kneels down to your curled up body, his face softens because you look like a kitten napping and the thought immediately makes his heart melt. He crouches closer to you and stamps your forehead with a kiss. His lips linger for a moment as he inhales the strawberries shampoo aroma of your wet hair.

He clicks his tongue to the roof of his mouth, “This girl.” He gently rubs the pad of his thumb on the fullness of your cheeks. “How many times do I have to tell her to dry her hair before she sleeps so she doesn’t get sick,” he quietly pressed to himself. 

▸ listen to out of my league by fitz and the tantrums

「 kun 」

“where do you think you’re going?” kun glared at you, tossing the dish towel in his hands over his shoulder. arms crossed, he had never looked more like a dad.

“to get some water?” you asked more than said, wincing as your voice rasped through your sore throat.

“baby,” kun whined, pushing you back towards your bedroom. “i’ve told you a million times to just let me take care of everything. text me the next time you need something, you shouldn’t use your voice.”

normally you might try to argue with him, but the headache pounding past your temples made you much more pliant, sinking willingly into your soft comforter.

kun fussed over you for a while, tucking blankets around you and checking your temperature with a hand on your forehead, before he gave you a quick kiss on the forehead, promising that dinner would be done in twenty minutes.

「 ten 」

you had felt a little warmer than normal ever since you woke up, but the sniffles had been slower coming. studying felt like a special kind of torture with the headache threatening to split your head open, but you had a bio exam next week so you showed up to the library to meet ten as usual.

the second he took in your dishelved appearance he was up from his seat, lips pressed together disapprovingly.

“y/n,” he scolded you gently. “what are you doing here and not in bed? when did you get sick?”

“i look that bad, huh?” you tried to laugh, but it made your head throb and your half hearted giggle was cut off by a whimper.

“let’s just go home, love,” ten shook his head, pressing a kiss to your forehead and smoothing your hair back comfortingly. “we can study when you’re feeling better.”

「 winwin 」

you hadn’t been getting very much sleep lately and it was starting to catch up with you. until last week you didn’t even think things were that bad, but it became clear there was a problem when you passed out in the middle of a grocery store on a mid morning run for almond milk.

sicheng had to come pick you up since you couldn’t drive home and he had been stuck to your side ever since.

“you should really be sleeping.”

you froze, left hand still stuck in the cookie jar, before slowly turning around to face your boyfriend.

“i was hungry,” you admitted sheepishly, carefully putting the lid of the jar back to avoid making eye contact with winwin, who looked more amused than anything.

“there are better things to eat, babe,” he smirked, wrapping his arms around your waist and pressing a kiss to your cheek. “but right now you need sleep. doctor’s orders.”

“yes sir.”

and admittedly there were worse things than a week in bed with your favorite boy giving you constant kisses.

「 lucas 」

he’s the most serious you’ve ever seen him. he takes every precaution to make sure you’re comfortable and healing quickly.

“i hate it when you’re sick,” he grumbles, head flopping onto your stomach. “it’s boring. i miss doing stuff with you.”

“we are doing stuff,” you reached one hand up to brush through his messy hair. lucas melted into your touch, a soft hum of satisfaction leaving his lips as you scratched against his scalp.

“you know what i mean,” he answered, eyes closed. “i miss taking you places that aren’t the doctor’s office and the convenience store.”

“yeah, me too,” your voice sounded sad and lucas felt a rush of guilt run through him as he realized he probably just made you feel worse.

“it’s okay, sweetheart,” he smiled, sitting up and switching your positions so that now you’re curled up in between his legs. “i love doing this just as much.”

「 xiaojun 」

despite your best efforts to stay quiet, a muffled sob wrenched its way past your lips as you found yourself throwing up for the third time in the past two hours.

for a second you just lay with your head against the bathtub, crying quietly, before the bathroom door cracked open, xiaojun shuffling inside, eyes narrowed against the comparatively bright light of the bathroom.

“y/n? you okay?” he mumbled, squinting at you as his eyes adjusted. it took him a second to realize that you were crying and then he was right next to you, wiping the tears from your cheeks and asking what was wrong in his gentlest voice.

“i think i’m sick, junnie,” you answered tearfully, sniffling miserably. xiaojun frowned, feeling his chest constrict at the sadness all over your cute little face.

“my poor baby,” xiaojun murmured, pulling you into a hug. “it’s okay, love. go brush your teeth, i’ll be right back with medicine so you can come back to bed. i love you so much. you’ll be okay.”

「 hendery 」

you don’t know what kind of karmic energy you must be carrying around which causes you and your boyfriend to get sick at the same time, but you figure you better start volunteering at animal shelters.

“bottoms up,” hendery dead pans popping two long red pills into his mouth. yours look the same, but you notice hendery has added two ibuprofen as he hands them to you.

“cheers,” you tap your water class against his before you both sip and swallow, collapsing right back into bed to start napping again.

“at least i get to kiss you,” hendery smiles before pressing his lips against yours for the thousandth time that morning.

“i don’t think you’re supposed to,” you giggle, but you don’t complain when he ignores you in favor of searching out your lips again. and again and again and again.

「 yangyang 」

“baby, where are you?” more than anything yangyang sounds confused as his voice filters through your phone’s speakers, tinny and smaller than life, but there’s a heavy dash of hurt in there too and it makes your heart hurt.

“i’m so sorry, bub,” you try to apologize before you’re cut off by a coughing fit.

“wait are you sick?”

“ye—”

“i’m on my way.”

he spends the whole day making sure you’re comfortable wherever you’re happiest, the couch or the bed, while you’re sick. he makes you hot tea with honey in it to help your throat and forces you to take a few sips of ginger ale every time you tell him your stomach feels even a little weird.

kun can’t see past the overflowing water in the sink. it’s nearing the edge, but he just stares down into it - the water too soap-filled to let his reflection gaze back up at him. his fingers bleeding. he cut it on the broken edge of a plate he never bothered to throw away. when you were here, even broken things seemed whole. he half expects he’ll hear you coming in from the other room - set your sights on the wound and come over to fret. you’ll pick up his hand, pout, nag at him for being careless while wrapping it up with tenderness that doesn’t match your voice at all. you’ll kiss his other fingers, giggle and say “thank god these are ok!” - he expects this to happen. now? now? now? it doesn’t.

ten rips photo after photo off the edge of the mirror in the bathroom. fuck you for using glue and not tape like a normal person - now he’s going to rub the residue off the glass for hours. the first picture goes easily, the second puts up a fight, the third and fourth nearly don’t come off, he stops prying and steps back to look for a pair of scissors. but instead - he doesn’t take his eyes off the photos remaining. he doesn’t take his eyes off your laughing face, still forever. this little alter of your memories used to be such a comfort, even when you weren’t here or he wasn’t here, there were these to remind you of the other. now the photos are like reminiscents of a haunting ghost - he leans forward - nails under the photograph. he pulls and pulls and pulls. the photo tears right in half, your face in his fist - his face still pinned up on the glass. 

yukhei runs a hand down his torso, the goosebumps of the early morning have him all groggy. he stumbles out of the bathroom and reaches for a tshirt haphazardly thrown over the dresser. but even through the heaviness of sleep, he picks up on your unmistakable smell. the hem of the shirt stays in his hand for a moment, before he releases it like it’s bite right through his flesh. he steps backward and blinks away the tired overcast that makes the room look all fuzzy. for a second, through his lashes, he thinks he sees you. at least the outline of you. you’re wearing that shirt, hands on your hips, telling yukhei something about how he’s never going to understand what you need - he’s never going to understand who you are - and that’s why you two will never work out. you disappear in a flash as his vision clears up and he reaches back out for the shirt, throwing it with a shaking palm to the floor.

sicheng pretends not to hear what xiaojun is saying. he focuses instead on his phone, scrolls aimlessly through a hoard of unanswered texts from people he cares litte about. but then xiaojun keeps saying your name. keeps repeating it like there’s no substance to this story, just you - always, just you. it irritates him, but if he gets up to leave he knows he’ll become the center of everyone’s attention. people will whisper about the hold you still have on him - oh poor sicheng, he’s not over them? sicheng grits his teeth - he’s over you. he’s over you. xiaojun says your name again, and then he’s talking about some other guy you know. sicheng turns his head without meaning to - “apparently they went on their first date last saturday!” xiaojun continues and sicheng’s grip on his phone tightens. the message window closes, his background photo shines against his hold. it’s still a photo of you two from your last anniversary. im over them. im over them. sicheng chants, but xiaojun’s voice eats him whole and he can’t believe that you’re the one that moved on first.

hendery watches the words “you lose” flash across the computer screen. it’s been the fifth time in a row and now he’s not even jaded by it. he just leans back in his chair and listens to the voices of his teammates curse him out through his headphones. “jesus dude, i know you just went through a breakup but like get it the fuck together!” there’s a second of silence until someone else is telling that person to shut the fuck up, but hendery knows that he’s right. he needs to get it the fuck together, but he can’t. he takes his headphones off and cradles his head in his hands. everytime he tries to distract himself, the pain just gets worse. the memories of you just get stronger. the fact that you’ve blocked his number and he can’t even apologize for whatever it is he did wrong burns up and he doesn’t know what getting it together even looks like anymore. you were the one thing holding him up and now he’s just falling apart.

xiaojun smiles at the pretty little person in front of him, they seem so shy and nervous to be next to him and xiaojun doesn’t want to ruin that. he doesn’t want to make another person feel exactly what he does. the painful, slow churn of dread and emptiness that seems to have taken him over like a disease. they keep giggling and tripping over their words - xiaojun could tell that it was one simple smile from him and this person might just combust on the spot. he hates to know you had the same effect on him. “excuse me for a second” he says, prying the softest voice he can muster out of his overly exhausted body. he rounds the corner and nearly slides down against the wall. he doesn’t want to be around anyone else, he doesn’t want to hear anyone else’s voice. he wants you. he wants you and he knows it’s selfish and messed up but god everything and everyone else just makes him so sick.