s.

i am holding my loneliness and she is a teenage girl with puffy eyes, and i love her more than i have ever loved anyone

GET YOUR BODY OUT OF SURVIVAL MODE SO YOU CAN CREATE FROM YOUR HEART

i’d say the best thing i have learned this year is to just let people be who they naturally are. no psychoanalyzing them, no overthinking my actions, no asking what i could possibly do to keep their presence in my life. i just bring my best self to the table and always move from a place of love and respect. how that person responds is ultimately up to them. if that causes them to exit my life, i just let it happen. i will never be in the business of changing people. people are only ever ready to change when they’ve made the conscious decision to. all i can do is check myself and be kind always.

this is SUCH a hard lesson to learn if you have anxious attachment problems. you’re constantly scheming to keep someone in your life, even at the expense of your mental health. i’ve been there so many times. it’s literally the most horrible feeling in the world, and it puts so much pressure on you to act the exact way you think the other person wants you to. all just so they grace you w the bare minimum. i feel so much lighter now that i literally just allow people to show who they are and let them fade out of my life organically. it’s brought me so much peace

Another advice for girls and young women: love and sex is supposed to be fun, happy and make your life better. If it’s not, if it’s making you miserable, if it’s making you love yourself less, if it’s making you doubt yourself, and if you feel like you have to sacrifice yourself or put up with things you don’t want to, you are absolutely entitled to throw it out from your life. In fact, you should, because your life is so, so valuable and you have the right to be happy. Being a girl does not mean having to accept misery and pain, even if that’s what we’re often taught. You are allowed to decide what comes into your life. Let it be happy and beautiful.

I seriously dislike that we as girls have been conditioned to seek relationships, and feel so fucking bad when things don’t work out. I wish we could adopt the boy’s approach of just living in the moment more often. I don’t think it’s anyone’s fault if someone thinks this way, like we were practically raised on romance and true love and shit like that. But the older you grow, and the more disappointed you are by people, the more psychic damage this thinking inflicts

It’s not lost on me that we use people as objects of desire we fulfill our romantic fantasies through. I feel like it’s why girls start playing mind games and get so anxious when a guy fades out or ghosts. We lose touch with the person we once liked. They just become a vessel to envision the outcome of a relationship through. And idk I think that’s so unhealthy

Anyway if you’re like. Hyperfixating on a crush to an unhealthy degree. And you want him/her/whatever to so badly just like you back and do more and whatever. Just pause for a sec and ask yourself if this person has become nothing more than an object to project through. Are you truly interested in building a connection with them, or do you do everything with the goal in mind to start a relationship? Or to start something romantic, period? That’s not healthy and it’s not fair for the other person. Bc they’re a person, not a means to an end. If you truly liked someone on a deep level, you’d recognize that you can’t control them like that. And you’d just let things flow bc in the end if everyone’s happy and healthy nothing else should matter

oh my god. most of life really is about the little things. a good haircut, a nice playlist, trying a new recipe that turns out well, a poem that hits home, a comfortable spot in the sun, spontaneous messages, a pen you enjoy writing with, tea with the right temperature to drink, buying that thing you’ve been eyeing for a while, a warm bed. yeah. im so grateful for the little enjoyments

bachpan mei ye jo mujhe red colour bht psnd tha bas uska hi nateeja bhugat rha ab ig