Wrestling Is Fake

Bandido vs. Nick Wayne

Bandido is defending the ROH men's world title. Wayne just turned 21 years old last month; the youngest man to ever hold this title was Low Ki, who was 22 when he became the very the first champion in 2002. So the challenger is seeking to break a record that's older than he is.

When Bandido first won the title, I was into the idea that he was a midcarder in AEW but whenever this belt was on the line he could transform into a big-league main eventer kicking out of the most epic finishers. We haven't seen much of that in 2026, though. He's only had four title defenses on AEW/ROH television this year, and his challengers haven't been as red-hot as the likes of Konosuke Takeshita last year. When he's in a genuinely big match, it's always non-title because he's going to get beat. Something needs to change, and I don't expect this match to turn things around.

I could see Wayne winning the title, but that would signal a pivot in ROH, from showcasing underused AEW midcarders to the guys who can't even get booked on AEW. Nick has the potential to be the top guy in that environment, but I don't think that would be must-see TV for me like when Bandido was delivering banger after banger. Thing is, if Bandido retains that doesn't address the problem either. We need someone he can pass the torch to that can really elevate ROH, and I don't see that guy showing up anytime soon.

Mistico & Mascara Dorada vs. Sammy Guevara & The Beast Mortos vs. Matt Taven & Mike Bennett vs. Dante Martin & Darius Martin

This is a four-way tag team match, so only two teams can have a legal man in the ring at any time, and they can tag in anyone from any team. The first man to score a fall on any opponent will win the match and the ROH tag team title for his team. But since four-way matches can't end by count-out or disqualification, those rules don't matter much, so practically anything goes.

Mistico and Dorada won the belts from Guevara and Mortos back in June; the former champs never got a rematch. Before that Guevara held the title with RUSH until he got sidelined, and before that Sammy held the title with Dustin Rhodes until he got sidelined. Guevara and Rhodes won the belts from Taven & Bennett in 2024; I don't think they ever got a rematch either. Top Flight (Dante and Darius) have never held this title.

Aside from the ROH tag title, Mistico also holds the CMLL world light heavyweight title, the CMLL trios title (with Dorada and Neon), and the IWGP junior heavyweight tag title (with El Desperado). That's a lot of stuff to keep track of, so I never expected this title reign to last very long. The safe bet is moving the belts back to Sammy and Mortos, although I could see The Kingdom stealing a win out of nowhere.

Lee Moriarty vs. Katsuyori Shibata

Moriarty is defending the ROH men's pure championship. The challenger was originally scheduled to be Nigel McGuinness, with the stipulation that he would never wrestle in ROH again. But Nigel is apparently working through a foot injury, and it's a tall enough order to compete in AEW's Continental Cup tournament, so he's withdrawn. Shibata defeated Wheeler Yuta last night to qualify for the spot.

Shibata is a super tough badass cool dude, but he's been greatly de-emphasized in the past few years. He's 2-0 against Moriarty, but those matches where in 2023-2024. Standard booking logic would be to deliver a title change to make up for the late substitution, but I tend to think Moriarty will hold the belt long enough to get a rain check on that McGuinness match.

Lio Rush vs. Action Andretti

Andretti is challenging for the ROH men's television title. This is billed as a "fight without honor," which just means the match can't end by count-out or disqualification.

These two each joined forces with Top Flight, and then split with them to become the tag team known as CRU. One day Lio busted out this weird-ass Gollum gimmick and everyone wondered what happened to the whole CRU thing. Then Andretti turned on Lio, I guess because he didn't like the new gimmick. Now they got a score to settle and Lio has a championship, which sort of works out well for Andretti.

I don't know what to expect from Lio's "Blackheart" character in this kind of environment, but on last night's show he had a chair wrapped in barbed wire, so I guess he's gonna do at least a few sicko deathmatch spots. The character is way more over than anything Action can do with the belt, so I expect Lio to retain.

Red Velvet vs. Marina Shafir vs. Skye Blue vs. Zayda Steel

Another four-way, this time for the ROH women's TV title, held by Velvet. The first woman to score a fall on any opponent wins the match and the title; other than that, anything goes. This one arose from a pair of Velvet & Steel vs. Shafir & Blue matches over the past week, which got violent but failed to settle anything.

Based on last night's tornado tag match, I assume all four women are going to try to go apeshit in their own ways with the weapons. Marina is logically the toughest and most over of the four, but it's hard to see the minor-league midcard belt fitting in on AEW television when she's playing enforcer for Jon Moxley. I'd be more into Skye winning the belt, although with Julia Hart on her way back from Japan, I don't know if a singles belt fits with their act as a team. Steel would be fun as a new babyface champ, but I wouldn't hold my breath. I guess I'm leaning towards Red keeping the belt, but this could really be anyone's match.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Steph De Lander

This is for the ROH women's pure title. Purrazzo became the inaugural champion back in December, but she was injured during a TV taping back in June, in a match with De Lander. As far as I know, the match was thrown out and never aired; I don't think they've even acknowledged it in the storyline. That has hampered any build to the match, so I'm not very invested in the outcome. A De Lander win would be more interesting but I get the feeling Purrazzo will retain.

Dalton Castle & Truth Magnum & Turbo Floyd vs. Jay Lethal & Blake Christian & Lee Johnson

Castle's team is defending the ROH trios title. The Lethal Twist have been getting build up on AEW as allies to Ricochet's trio, the Demand. Which is weird, because both groups are trios and the Demand are chasing the AEW trios title, so I don't know what the Lethal Twist gets out of being their flunkies. I mean, they could come out of this with the ROH trios title, but they didn't need to work for the Demand to get this match. Not sure who will win here, but I would think the winners should be involved in whatever Hangman Page is setting up for the AEW trios belts at All In next week.

Queen Aminata & Mina Shirakawa vs. Vertvixen & Viva Van

Ryohei Oiwa vs. Yuya Uemura

This is the final of the G1 Climax tournament. There is no time limit, and there must be a winner. We know the victor will receive a trophy, a flag, and a shot at the IWGP heavyweight title. We don't know when that title shot will happen; for the past few years the winner has elected not to wait until January 4 in the Tokyo Dome.

Both blocks ended in three-way ties at 6 wins and 3 losses. The tiebreakers shook out to heavyweight champ Yota Tsuji leading A Block and the previous champ Callum Newman on top of B Block, with Oiwa and Uemura as their respective runners-up. Yesterday Oiwa beat Newman and Uemura beat Tsuji in the semifinals, putting both of them at 7-3. Then again, Oiwa had to win a play-in game just to qualify, so you could argue he's at 8-3 so far.

This is arguably the best matchup they could do for the final. Considering Shota Umino got sidelined early on, there's no way to know if he was supposed to be here instead of Uemura, but I'm glad it worked out this way. Umino, Tsuji, and Ren Narita were hyped up as "the Reiwa Musketeers" a few years ago, and it's never felt like their booking has lived up to that hype. Meanwhile, Oiwa and Uemura felt like afterthoughts underneath those guys, but they've flourished without the all the unrealistic expectations burdening them.

I checked Cagematch and could only find one singles encounter between these two, in last year's G1: Uemura got the win that night. I could see him leading the company, since he's got that white-meat babyface aesthetic that worked so well for Hiroshi Tanahashi. But Oiwa has had a great tournament, and I dig that he's a big mean guy who applies his strength to holds more than strikes or throws. Oiwa vowed to win this tournament in honor of Hiroyoshi Tenzan, who retired last night, and something tells me he's going to make good on that promise.

Yota Tsuji & Taiji Ishimori vs. Hirooki Goto & YOH

Tsuji fully intended to win the G1 as the top champion, so I'm sure he's not happy about coming up short last night. As the champion, his next priority is dealing with challengers who posted wins against him in the block matches, and it looks like Goto is at the top of that list. I'm not sure what the case is for Ishimori being the next challenger for Yoh's IWPG junior heavyweight title, but I guess that's the direction now. I can't complain; this is a solid two-on-two match previewing key title bouts on the next tour, so it's more than I expected from tonight's semi-main. Seems like Ishimori should pin Yoh for the win.

Konosuke Takeshita & Taichi & Satoshi Kojima vs. Shun Skywalker & SANADA & Ren Narita

The big story on last night's undercard was Skywalker arriving in New Japan to join House of Torture and attacking Takeshita. I assume those two will tangle soon for Take's television title. Kojima is coming off the emotional retirement match of his longtime friend Hiroyoshi Tenzan, to team with his unlikely partner Taichi. Taichi used to be close friends with Sanada until Sanada turned on him a couple years ago. Narita is just a dick.

This match has to be a showcase for Skywalker, and I hope he brings the goods instead of just doing House of Torture shenanigans to troll the audience for expecting anything better. I expect the heel team to win.

Gabe Kidd & Wheeler Yuta vs. Drilla Moloney & Shingo Takagi

Kidd is the IWGP global champion, but his ex-teammate Moloney pinned him during the G1, and seems to be staking his claim to the next title shot. Yuta is no slouch serving as Kidd's partner, but he's no Shingo Takagi. Pretty sure the War Dragons will clobber Yuta for the win.

Callum Newman & HENARE & Great-O-Khan vs. Yuto-Ice & OSKAR & Daiki Nagai

Henare and O-Khan won the IWGP heavyweight tag team title from Ice and Oskar shortly before the G1; now that it's over, the Knockout Brothers can't wait to get the belts back.

There's another interesting wrinkle in that O-Khan and Henare share the NEVER trios belts with Will Ospreay, who is currently a bit estranged with the United Empire. Will has called in Henare and Francesco Akira to back him up later this week in AEW; it seems clear that those guys are cool with him while Newman and O-Khan aren't so much. I have no idea when that's going to come to a head, but I bet the English announce team will be talking about it during this match.

I'd like to see Ice and Oskar get the win, but Nagai is a bit of a weak link for their team, so Newman's side is bound to squash him.

Zack Sabre Jr. & Kosei Fujita & Hartley Jackson vs. Oleg Boltin & Master Wato & Tatsuya Matsumoto

Apparently Matsumoto is a late substitute for Aaron Wolf, who's under the weather. Wolf's presence would've made this match feel less random, since Sabre pinned him in the G1, and last night Fujita challenged him for the NEVER title. As it is, I suppose someone on Sabre's team could pick a fight with Boltin for the STRONG title, if New Japan even remembers that championship exists. Someone on Zack's team will almost certainly beat Matsumoto.

Togi Makabe & Toru Yano vs. Zane Jay & Francesco Akira

Last night Makabe and Yuto-Ice got in each other's faces, and Yano scored a surprise pinfall on Oskar, so we're clearly setting up a Knockout Brothers vs. Most Violent Players match down the line. I suppose this match is to heat up Makabe and Yano as credible contenders in the tag division. No complaints there, I like both guys, let 'em kill Jay and Akira.

Ryusuke Taguchi & El Desperado & YOSHI-HASHI & Masatora Yasuda vs. SHO & DOUKI & Yujiro Takahashi & Yoshinobu Kanemaru

Last night much was made about Taguchi winning the DDT universal title recently, and then Ren Narita pinned him. So I assume those two have to fight for the title, whether it's on a New Japan show or a DDT shot. But instead of previewing that, Taguchi is facing off with damn near everybody else in House of Torture except Narita. How odd.

Hiroyoshi Tenzan vs. Satoshi Kojima

This is Tenzan's retirement match, and the fact it's just a five-minute exhibition tells you how thrashed his body has to be after a 35-year career. I first saw him wrestle when I started watching New Japan in 2015, and even back then he was positioned as the lovable old-timer whose best days were behind him. In that time he's been inseparable from his longtime tag team partner Kojima, so it's no surprise who his final opponent would be.

Tenzan hasn't had a match since April, and he hasn't faced anybody one-on-one in over five years. His last singles victory was in 2018, and his last match against Kojima was in 2015. I never experienced the peak years of his career, but for eleven years I've listened to the English announce team put over this broken down old man as a fearsome legend, and they made me believe it. It's tough knowing his last match is going to be a physical struggle to go more than a few minutes. But it's nice that he gets to go out near the end of the G1, when the world is watching.

I guess it's possible this will go to a draw, but at this point going the full five minutes might be asking too much of Tenzan. I'm thinking Kojima will pin him after about 90 seconds, so we can get on with a lengthy and much-deserved retirement ceremony.

Yota Tsuji vs. Yuya Uemura

This is one of the semifinal matches in the G1 Climax tournament. Tsuji is the IWGP heavyweight champion, but his title isn't at stake during the G1. He finished A Block in first place, and is remarkably close to winning the tournament that is meant to set up a challenger for his title. Uemura is the runner-up in B Block, and obviously wants to win the G1, but beating the champion here would be a major accomplishment in and of itself.

These two were intense rivals in their Young Lion days. In the 52 singles matches where they've squared off, Uemura and Tsuji have posted an incredible twenty-two draws. Since Yuya returned from excursion in 2023, however, they've only had five singles encounters, with Tsuji leading 3-2. The most memorable of these, in my mind, is the hair vs. hair match in February 2024, where Uemura had to shave his head. Tsuji has had the edge ever since, and Yuya's career isn't going to get to the next level until he can get a winning record over this guy.

I don't think the top champion in New Japan has made it to the final of New Japan's top tournament in a quarter of a century. That doesn't mean it can't happen--I figure sooner or later they'll try it just because no one expects it--but I wouldn't count on it happening. Someone needs to beat Tsuji to set up someone earning a shot at Tsuji's title. Maybe if Shota Umino hadn't been sidelined at the start of the tournament, it could've been him. But honestly I think Yuya is a better candidate. Even if he doesn't win the G1, I'm picking Uemura to go over tonight.

Callum Newman vs. Ryohei Oiwa

This is the other G1 semifinal. Newman finished at the top of B Block; Oiwa came in second in A Block. Callum's shoulder was fucked up when he lost the IWGP heavyweight title in June; it is certainly not doing much better now, after the war he had with HENARE to get here. That's a big problem when you're facing a guy who combines mean-guy strength with technical prowess like Oiwa. Gorilla Monsoon always said you're never gonna beat anybody with a headlock, but Oiwa is turning his headlock into a finisher.

I think this is Oiwa's match to lose. I'm not saying he's a lock to win the G1, but I can't see Newman going to the final. Callum had a fine run as champion a few moths ago, but he's already secured his spot as the top heel foreigner in the company. New Japan needs to build up top Japanese babyfaces to Tsuji's level, so they need to push Oiwa sooner rather than later.

An Oiwa vs. Uemura final is probably the best possible outcome. Granted, last year's G1 ended with a Takeshita vs. EVIL match I refused to watch out of spite, so we know New Japan is somewhat allergic to doing what's best for the company. But heaven help me, this time I really believe they'll do the right thing. Oiwa for the win.

Aaron Wolf & Oleg Boltin & Tatsuya Matsumoto vs. Zack Sabre Jr. & Kosei Fujita & Hartley Jackson

Sabre beat Wolf in an interesting block match a couple days ago, so I guess this is following up on that. Maybe they'll set up Sabre chasing Wolf for the NEVER title? Boltin is the STRONG champion so I suppose he needs a challenger too, but I don't think we're going to deal with that on this show. Matsumoto is the young boy in this match so I figure he'll lose the fall.

Shingo Takagi & Yuto-Ice & OSKAR & Taiji Ishimori & Gedo vs. Yuji Nagata & Togi Makabe & Toru Yano & YOH & Master Wato

Takagi, Yuto, and Oskar all had respectable showings in the G1, but none of them are going to be the focus in the heavyweight singles division anytime soon. I assume Yuto and Oskar will be back to chasing the tag title this fall. The big news in this match is Nagata and Makabe both showing up; it feels like we're seeing each of them less and less as their careers wind down. I'm sure they're in town for the Tenzan retirement ceremony, but I'll be happy to see 'em do a few nostalgia spots here. I feel like Shingo's team should win, except Gedo is easily the weakest link, so I dunno.

Gabe Kidd & Wheeler Yuta vs. Drilla Moloney & Daiki Nagai

I haven't kept up with the undercard tag matches on this tour, so I just noticed Gabe Kidd didn't wrestle in any of those. Which means this is the first time on the tour that he's needed a partner, so he's brought in the Death Riders' designated young boy. I'd like to see more of Kidd vs. Moloney, but I don't think it's in the cards. Gabe will probably squash Nagai, and then move on to a rematch with Shota Umino for the IWGP global title.

Konosuke Takeshita & El Desperado & Ryusuke Taguchi & Taichi vs. SANADA & Ren Narita & DOUKI & SHO

Take came awfully close to making the semifinals, but it wasn't to be. Oh well, he's already booked for a big AEW international title bout at Wembley Stadium, he'll be fine. Sanada and Narita represented House of Torture in this year's G1, and weren't as annoying as the House was last year, but also weren't very memorable. I was thinking Sanada might beat Takeshita to get back in contention for the television title, but no such luck. Maybe Narita can pin Take here to set up a match? I don't know why I'm trying to think of ways for House of Torture guys to get title shots, they fucking suck. Anyway, the House of Torture team will probably win just to fuck with me.

HENARE & Great-O-Khan & Francesco Akira & Jakob Austin Young vs. Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI & Masatora Yasuda & Taisei Nakahara