sun wearing sunglasses + thunderstorm emoji

Gen alpha is so brainrotted because there’s too many satellites affecting their astrology. These babies got Starlink #637 in Pisces and BeiDou in Aries and ISS in Virgo and shit, its like spiritual microplastics

my bravest knighttt... come hither ..... mmmwah !! ok you are dismissed

always good to have friends who are at least 5 years older than you and friends who are at least 5 years younger than you. being the youngest person you know will make you feel like an inexperienced child who knows nothing of the world. being the oldest person you know will make you feel like the joker.

every time i see a 19 year old friend do something successful i can be comforted by the fact i also know people who are 35 and unemployed. nobody has to run on the same time and the world is beautiful.......

thanks for making time for an interview for this managerial role overseeing the microsoft 365 team. what really stood out to us about you - and what rocketed you to the top of our list - was that part in your cover letter where you described yourself as a “sick fuck” who “would stop at nothing to see the microsoft 365 suite of products reduced to a functionless, pale imitation of their 2007-era predecessors” and that the user should “toil fruitlessly as they navigate a completely bewildering interface while being forced to ruminate on how they own nothing and instead rent increasingly expensive useless vapor.” when would you be available to start?

Not a word of shit I am so fucking angry that vaping has entered public consciousness as a common and rote habit. Do you understand that when I, not even in my REAL ADULT numbers, was a teen, almost none of us smoked? Like. Maybe ten, fifteen kids in my whole ass school. When E-Cigarettes came out, we pretty much all figured it was dorky-looking and stupid, like the cancer version of riding a Segway. But no. No, they made the computer drugs fruit flavoured and yall lost your fucking minds. AND THEN THEY TOOK THE HANDLEBAR OFF THE SEGWAY AND CALLED IT A HOVERBOARD

When you make love potions, you have to add the thing where they turn whatever they’re added to bright magenta and give off pink vapour in the shape of little hearts. Love potions don’t do that on their own when you make them. It’s like how they have to add smells to natural gas in case there’s a leak. The high magic council is really strict about this

"google ai" "spotify ai dj" "ai assistant" "enhanced by ai" what if i just start beating people over the head with a rock

"if being hard on yourself was going to work it would have worked by now" okay well being soft on myself isn't working either so what the fuck is left. medium? I gotta be medium with myself? I gotta ask the fucking ghosts for help? is that it?

Honestly fuck AI for making me have to go on and on defending the dignity of toil like I’m some kind of protestant

idle minds go to slop. get thee away from chatbot sacrament. not ensouled