welcome to the alleyway⋆｡°

tried tofu for the first time (sorry vegans i could never be u)

watched a guy who nearly ran me over on his scooter face plant. felt nothing. divine karma is real

been to frat tailgates for football but have yet to go to an ACTUAL func. my accuracy of the party girl! reader x jimmy olsen fic remains under the need to be peer reviewed

took my first test!

failed said test. but then got a 95 on the next one so i'm literally goated

stood too close to a speaker and lost full hearing in one of my ears for 48 hours

been to so many business events for a second i felt my brain leaking out of my eyes

all in all life is actually pretty good?? i'm surprised?? i've met a lot of cool people and gotten to do a lot of cool stuff and i'm like......thriving or something wtf.

this account and writing still means a lot to me!!! on rough days i read my comments and my reposts to remind myself i'm capable of cool things it's just hard to balance my school work and my social life and my rest time and still have the energy to do anything creative. i'm hoping i'll have something soon, but if not it might not be til my school breaks start......i'm so sorry gamers i miss u all

i can’t lie to you guys, i'm horrified. i'm scared of change, and scared of new situations, and scared of so much it's (probably?) a sign to do something about it. but tumblr and writing and doing all this "cringy" stuff is me doing something about it. posting on this hellsite was a way for me to step outside my comfort zone and start getting used to being uncomfortable, but i was met with joy and compliments and now all i wanna do is post more.

i started writing because of one of my incredible best friends (you can check out her blogs here or here) and she is also one of the reasons i have this courage to post in the first place. i get my strength from the people i love so to be away from them even just a little bit is hard, but i know i can manage and survive because of those relationships and the hope i carry as well.

as stupid as it sounds, superman gave me a lot of hope. in the beginning, this was going to be a blog for a lot of shitposting and anime fics - and it quickly spiraled into something else that i both cannot control and am not mad about. superman means a lot to me, especially for someone who wasn't all that interested in seeing it until i saw others loving it online (i'm a sheep. i'm sorry) and it reminded me how much i love heroes and how badly i needed one right now.

all of this is to say that i appreciate everything. every like, every comment, every reblog, every note. especially every follower. and just because i'm not posting writing as frequently doesn't mean i won't see it all. it seriously never fails to make me smile. you guys are incredible and i'll be back as soon as i can breathe comfortably again.

the first time you ever set foot in metropolis, it's because you're running away.

in your defense - gotham kind of sucked. not in any major way, but you were relocated to their local office of your boring desk job for some corporate reason you couldn't really decipher. so you went, even if it was farther than you wanted because you assumed that, hey - maybe it wouldn't be terrible.

it was. it was terrible. for you, at least.

your friends were scattered across the country, you had to leave what little coworkers you tolerated, and your family is now miles and miles away at any given point. gotham at least had a cheaper cost of living, but your furnished apartment brought little comfort when their were constantly supervillains duking it out in the alley beneath your window. and that was on the edges of the city.

not to mention that your boss expected you to do the work of a secretary, for the salary of an intern. that was the worst part, being ordered around and treated like something expendable when you weren't. you knew that you weren't.

so when you found out they wanted to move you closer to the heart, even further from everything and everyone you loved, you refused. especially because they wanted to cut your pay for it also. your boss stressed the decision - it was either relocation (again) or termination. the choice was laughably easy, actually.

so, now you're here. in a new city, with a nice unemployment check - because they at least did that correctly - and a new beginning. you forgot how nice it feels to breathe.

metropolis. well, at least it's safer than gotham. it has that going for it right off the bat.

your new apartment is cute. it has a balcony, and a fire escape, and even rooftop access if you play your cards right and act nice with your landlord. this is your chance to start over. and so, you do.

with every deep clean, every redecoration, every new piece of furniture, you can feel yourself returning. gotham made you tough, but you were tough before. you needed something more than just survival. and this feels like a good place for something more. it takes barely a day with the help of the movers, and suddenly the flat you're just renting out starts to feel like home.

you have an interview with your new boss the day after next. so you spend the morning before shopping with what money you had set aside for a rainy day and completely deck out your wardrobe, just the way you like it. a new work bag, new shoes, new whatever. you name it. it feels like freedom - and, kind of is. they're much more relaxed about their dress code. and you get some cute keychains for your bag.

and when the time finally comes, you're ready. all mr. white wants to see is how much you can do, where your skills will work the best. it's a publisher, but at least all your moonlighting as a secretary means you can edit. write, eh, maybe a little, but your talent is with numbers. that's where you know you can impress him.

you get dressed, and with your new clothes, you feel more put together than you have in months. you also stop at the coffee shop you found along your route the other day. it's not that overpriced, but for coffee in the city, it could be worse. so you don't complain. the doorman is sweet also, and directs you where you need to go even though you kind of already know.

the elevator ride up is more nerve wracking than it should be.

the daily planet is beautiful, especially before work hours. mr. white called you in early so he'd have time to talk to you properly before he was stuck running around, hounding his employees all day. you can tell he's doing his best to put you at ease, in his own gruff kind of way, but you're too busy looking around to be anxious.

it sounds corny, but the way the sun lights everything up and bathes it in gold? it could bring you to your knees, it's so beautiful. the desks are organized, sat in pairs or facing each other. you're not sure you'll have a cubicle in the center of the bullpen alongside the reporters, but you don't mind. you don't need to be in the center of the action. you just need a job you don't hate.

the interview is a little tense, at first - you're expecting to get hounded for your degree choice or why you chose the daily planet of all companies. but in reality, the conversation flows once he asks you about your specialty. and then you don't shut up. you don't think he minds necessarily, but also that after this, you might want to chose your words just a little more carefully.

it doesn't take much after that. of course you're hired. it'd be a surprise if you weren't.

⋆｡°✩

jimmy's had a rough morning. another intern quit, which marks the second one this month. he doesn't care, not really. he has his circle, his bubble, and that's just the way he likes it. it does, however, mean that he's taking on more than he should really have to.

so, add that to the fact that there's spilled coffee both on his shirt and on some of his unused (and now ruined) film, and that he barely slept because off all the coffee the day before - he's not doing so great.

lois is trying to complain to him, talking about sources or something and some other. jimmy isn't listening, he's just wishing the day was over already. and perry's been busy all morning, which isn't helping his mood either. he needs this next piece greenlit so he can move on to the other one in his queue of projects, but he still hasn't come out of his office and come on man, what could possibly-

the doors opening - finally - and jimmy shoots up out of his chair, rough draft in hand. he doesn't even look when he speeds over, already talking and flipping through stapled pages like it's on fire. he just wants this over with so it can get uploaded before the rest of his portfolio rots away.

"hey, chief, need you to read over this real quick so i can-" and then he looks up and nearly topples over from how hard he stops. you think his shoes probably left tire treads on the tile.

oh, shit.

you don't look much different. you've changed how you do your hair a little, and you're taller. half a decade has changed the way you carry yourself, maybe, but other than that - that's it. you look like you. he wishes he had bothered to try and look presentable today. or something else, he thinks his brain is failing right now. god, he's staring. he knows he is, but he can't help it. not when you're here and-

are you staying?

he blinks. you look just as startled as he does, but you're starting to smile. just a little. perry doesn't even really notice, just closes the distance jimmy left open and grabs the paper from him. he reads it quickly, nods, make another comment about not calling him chief, and then ignores jimmy's existence entirely.

he doesn't even mind. perry's saying something about where your desk will be - next to lois, how lucky is he gonna get? - and what your workload will look like. monitoring numbers, seeing what grabs the publics attention and how, which categories or styles are best suited for each writer. hell, you even get a title. head marketing director. you don't even know if it's a real title, but you don't care.

you get to design logos and offer input on the layout headings and photos of the papers also. this is already a step up from gotham. in a lot of ways.

it doesn't take long for him to approach you once perry disappears and everyone else is done saying polite hellos. and the time it does take is used to simply steel his nerves. he doesn't know why he's so nervous - it's just you, after all. but that's the issue. it's you.

so, when you're in the middle on unpacking whatever random trinkets and decorations you brought in for your desk, he takes lois getting more coffee as an opportunity. he walks over, tries not to trip over himself. fails miserably.

"hi stranger." he sticks his hands in his pockets to stop from fiddling with them. he's trying to look cool and unbothered, though he doubts he can keep it up. he's already made a fool of himself.

"hi, jimmy." you smile all coy, like you knew one way or another you'd end up here with him. even though you really, really didn't.

"so, you're uh- here? like, officially?" he rocked backed and forth, shifting his weight like it could sift out the right words from his brain. he's still not over the shock and it still kind of feels like he's blue screening right now.

"mhm. head marketing director and everything. wanna see my salary?" you smile again, tilt your head, and he feels his heart physically move in his chest. shit, it hasn't even been five minutes of talking to you and he's already a goner all over again.

but he doesn't say anything, just laughs and keeps watching you unpack. more random figures, one he recognizes from a show you made him watch a lifetime ago, a few pictures. and then he sees it.

another picture, the one of the two of you from that party sophomore year ages ago, where you're both covered in glitter and can't sit still.

he blinks a few times. feels his mouth dry up on the spot. makes the cognitive decision - actually thinks it out in his mind - how little being cool means and how much he doesn't care about nonchalance in this moment.

"i missed you. uhm. by the way." he throws it out like its casual. you both know it isn't, since it stops you with your hand midway in your bag.

"i missed you too, jackass." you roll your eyes like it doesn't mean the world to hear that from him.

and then, you're both screwed.

you meet his coworkers - clark, lois, steve, and cat - and they seem nice enough. steve makes you wonder, but the others seem able to straighten him out, so you don't exactly mind. cat compliments your outfit and clark assures you that if you need anything, you can come to him (much to jimmy's dismay at first). lois is sharp as all hell but relaxes a little when jimmy gives her a look.

you love her already.

you learn the work is somehow both easy and fulfilling, a combination you haven't had in ages. not since you were first working towards your degree in the first place. jimmy spends half of his time leaning over his cubicle and trying to talk to you, much to lois' annoyance. you four discuss superman and what he means for the future of metropolis.

the other three are slightly surprised when you mention that you haven't seen superman yet, outside of the articles you've read and the pictures you've seen. you're grateful, cause it means you've avoided any major disaster since you moved in. he seems alright, maybe a little happy-go-lucky for your taste, but not evil like that bald guy keeps preaching on the tv.

clark laughs when you make the comment. and then the days fly by. you get adjusted quickly, fall back into a routine with jimmy like you never really left one at all. it doesn't feel like you did. he's just as sweet as he was back in school. he even remembers your drink preference when your brain starts to turn to mush and you need a pick me up.

you can't remember why you and jimmy ever stopped talking - one of you got into a relationship, you think? couple that with the distance and the inability to party as grown ass adults with big kid jobs...

whatever. you missed him.

and you do help out, even outside of offering some sense normalcy for him. but now it feels like helping and not being ordered around. you make runs to the other departments if perry asks for an update on their numbers, pick up drinks for the four of you when you're coming back. scribble random details lois asks you to keep track of for her. maybe you're still slightly acting like a secretary, but you don't mind this time - at least you're getting paid properly.

and besides - you're helping out your friends. how could you mind? and the others love you. except when jimmy's puppy dog act starts to get on their nerves.

his stupid ringtone is going off again, and lois is about to tear her hair out for the third time today. it's some song you mentioned forever ago, and then he made it specifically yours once he actually listened to it. all these years later, it's still your song. thank god you never changed numbers.

"yell-o?" jimmy picked up the phone as casually as he could once he saw the name on the screen. spelled out in thick block letters accompanied by a picture he got of you years ago at another party he dragged you off to, blurry and out of focus.

you're standing on a couch, hair messed up and your outfit a state after god knows what. you're screaming song lyrics you don't actually know and you're absolutely covered in glitter. this picture is kind of the only memory you both have of the night after all the partying you did.

you hate the photo. he made it your contact picture the minute he realized he even had it, because it summarizes your college years better than anything else could.

"you owe me for this jimmy. so fucking much." you're annoyed. and tense, he can tell. your voice is all strained like it normally gets when your body scrunches up. you're out getting some pictures for him while he's stuck following up with a source of his back at the office.

you call it headquarters. he doesn't really argue.

"yeah, yeah. i know. but the senator is inside that meeting, we know he is. you just gotta get proof of him leaving and we're set." he puts a little emphasis on his words hoping you'll keep sticking it out. it doesn't work. he lent you one of his old cameras with settings already figured out so you could get a discernable picture for him.

"that's great and all, but i've been sitting here for three hours burning gas and nursing a cold coffee i don't even like!" you're yelling now. it's hard to remain inconspicuous, even in the old car you dragged to this city when you moved when you're being so loud.

but you really don't care - you're tired, hungry, and at this point you think you've wasted away half your muscle mass. being helpful does not mean suffering.

"c'mon. work a little magic for me? please?" he tries for a sweeter approach, and you don't say anything at first. just huff - aggressively.

"you're a pain in my ass, james." he can hear you rolling your eyes, but the irritation is (mostly) gone from your voice. you only ever use his government name when you're trying to make fun of him, but he doesn't mind if it's you. he won't admit to himself why - at least, not yet.

"that's my girl." he smiles into the receiver like you can see him before you curse him out some more and hang up. he sets his phone down to get back to work, but he can feel lois staring at him from across the cubicle. she seems slightly less annoyed now also.

look at him go, he's two-for-two.

"jimmy and sparkles sittin' in a tree." lois starts to hum the rest of the tune before jimmy cuts her off. it's been her go-to nickname since she saw some of the pictures from school, old ones that jimmy had lying around. you don't mind, but you refuse to acknowledge them as your "glory days" when you spent your time living off of bad dining hall food and 2 hours of sleep a semester.

"heyheyhey- knock it off. and seriously? still, with the sparkles?" he looks at her like she might be crazy and like you might somehow overhear.

"oh, come on. i feel like the glitter speaks for itself, here." she's smiling at him like she just won the lottery and jimmy rolls his eyes.

"sparkles is banned. don't use it again." he says it like it's a threat, but he's smiling when he sees you've texted him. more complaining and cursing him out, probably, but it's fine. he's just happy that you aren't going to kill him when you get back to the office.

when you do come back, you hassle him and tell him he owes you gas money and this and that, but he doesn't care. it's like every time you come back to the office, it's just as fun as the first time.

and so, you keep coming back. you don't think anything could keep you away at this point.

it's months later that things start to change, for real this time. you're staying later at the office, or asking him to come over to look at your notes when you don't really need him to. it's just a excuse to eat takeout and hangout like you used to. the lines are starting to blur again, more and more, but neither of you will call the other on it.

you're at the office when the line splits.

you have to give your first quarterly report for the year, which you don't exactly mind. but it's been years since you had to do any sort of public speaking and you really don't wanna. you're complaining to the others, half sitting on the free space of jimmy's desk while he tries to solve a crossword.

"you're seriously nervous?" lois asks, looking over a cup of way too sweet coffee. clark's ears poke up and he rolls his way over by the conjoined desks and jimmy snorts. your attention shoots over to him and you smack him lightly on the back of the head.

"no. i just don't love doing it. it's awkward, you know?" you shift your weight uncomfortably. jimmy rubs his hand across his neck like it hurts (it doesn't) and glances over.

"liar. you hate public speaking. you have since forever." he shrugs and goes back to his crossword, stuck on a word going down the screen.

"that doesn't mean i'm scared. or nervous." you point out the answer to jimmy before turning your attention back to clark and lois. "i've done worse. i just..."

jimmy spins around in his seat and gives you a look. you know what's coming, it's been used as an argument since it first happened.

"i held your hand while you got your bellybutton pierced, but you can't handle five minutes of public speaking?" he smiles like the little shit he is. you sigh. damn you, jimmy.

you have to spend 20 minutes dodging questions from an astonished clark and a curious lois, but you think that might be because she wants to get hers done too (you catch her looking at jewelry later).

the rest of the day goes by smoothly, despite clark's strange absence for a good deal of it. but you've learned to ignore his oddities, because c'mon. it's clark! he's been affectionately helpful since day one. even when he's late all the time, even when he gets a little too excited when discussing superman, even when he disappears at random.

you're at your desk, typing away and planning what you're gonna say at this meeting. it's not just the numbers since you've begun, but the summary of past reports from before you showed up - you think it'll be good to be proactive in your summary. you're immersed in your work when the announcement goes off that there's a monster destroying downtown.

the tv's are going as they always are, jimmy's asking lois about source intel, and everyone's running around doing their own thing while some reptilian monster continues to terrorize the city. the news blares on, live and covering the footage they're able to gather of both superman and the justice gang eventually euthanizing the terror.