I probably shouldn't, but I'm gonna.

did u know that that means you can do this

for like £100 for the whole room of edge to edge coverage with loads to spare

The lieutenant being too autistic to pick up her signals (or lack thereof) and guessing from context that she's inviting him to her quarters as some kind of date/booty call. Buying flowers because that's What You Do when visiting a lady alone in her boudoir.

It's just the perfect storm of two people desperately trying to Human at each other and failing.

Bonus for her incorrectly guessing Marcus sent her the flowers and angrily giving them "back" in what appears to be a very sweet if inexplicably aggressive romantic gesture.

And some people might have questioned this story, noticed the "oh fuck" expression that even I saw on his face. Might have thought asking one question then taking his unfinished coffee away and shooing him out looks more suspicious than just saying "soooo how do you feel about the president?" in the middle of the work day.

A BAC content of 0.4% is defined as "the lethal dose" in most medical textbooks. That's the dose where half the people that reach it do not survive, the LD50. You take 20 people off the street, make them drink til their BAC is 0.4%, and odds are good you'll kill 10 of them.

For most people, that takes something like 13 back to back shots, equivalent to 20 oz total, or 600 mL.

If this woman weighed 200 lbs (90 kg) and just straight chugged those bottles in under an hour, her BAC would've peaked around 1.6, which is 4 times the level that would kill most people outright. It would take her 85 hours after stopping drinking to "sober up" to merely the lethal level.

If she were to space it over a 24 hour bender, that would still result in a peak BAC of "merely" 1.4%, still over three times the lethal dose, with an estimated three days to return to "merely lethal" levels of sobriety.

Several thoughts on this.

That fact that this person is not dead is, by itself, impressive.

The fact that they were able to travel somewhere and pull a prank in that state is legitimately incredible. The LD50 for falls is 50 feet. In my head, I am putting this on the same level as a woman falling out of a 5 story window, staggering away, only to get apprehended later gluing googly eyes to random objects.

There was a drinking game some of my friends played in college while watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail that we always wound up cheating at, because every time we attempted it we got blitzed. We did a fully sober watch of it one time while tallying, and that drinking game would've required us to take 55 shots in order to make it through honestly. We all agreed that was ridiculous, but I am only now processing that it was ridiculous in a way that could actually get people killed. If you're making drinking games, please try to give yourself a 9 shot budget, tops.

This woman consumed the equivalent of 65 shots. Which means that she alone could pass the Monty Python drinking game.

One of the Golden Rules from back in my Misspent Youth was to never ever ever drink while rolling. Ever.

It's been like ... 26 years since I did MDMA (yes, some of you can do math, that is in fact what changed)... but IIRC MDMA makes it harder to remember how much you've had to drink or tell how drunk you are, and you can end up drinking too much alcohol and/or too much water (bc you're puking and/or sweating too much), and it's just... bad. Confusion, delirium, memory loss, total inability to regulate your body temperature...

This won't matter in the moment, but combining alcohol and MDMA can strip way more serotonin out of your brain in concert than either one does alone, leading to a phenomenon known as "Suicide Tuesday," where you drop out of your 3-day-weekend-long roll/drunk into a dark well with no bottom that lasts for days and days while your brain desperately tries to shove serotonin back into itself.

My stepmother did NOT like the way her Libertarian Viking Neighbor framed pregnancy as the fetus "attacking the woman". She incredulously told him this was extremely disrespectful to expectant mothers to portray pregnancy as so violent and negative.

Libertarian Viking Neighbor's response was that people consensually hurt each other all the time, and "there's like a whole community about that, with the acronym the one that starts with a B" And his reasoning was that if the mother was consenting to bring attacked by the baby, it in fact wasn't violent and negative because there was consent.