Wooahae Ruby

To You

Jihoon/Woozi x Reader

Ao3 Link

Soulmate AU, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Angst, Slow Burn Fluff

Fallin' Flower

I cowrote this with @doahaesunshine

?? X Reader

AO3 Link

Magic AU, Fantasy AU, Trauma, Depression, Manipulation, Angst

Blood Stained Hands

Jeonghan x Reader, Reader x Joshua. Reader x Cheol

Ao3 Link

Mafia AU, Violence, Non-Major Character Death, Mentions of Drugs, graphic depictions of violence, revenge Ft. Ateez, Stray Kids, TXT, Dreamcatcher, and others

☆Works In Progress☆

Started / WIPS but all private currently as I work

Fallin' Flower Vol. 2

Volume 2 of Fallin' Flower, DoahaeSunshine is working on it and I have been helping/going to be editing once more is written. [Hiatus but he is trying]

Unnamed Seungcheol Soulmate AU )

Soulmate AU, Teacher, Single Mom

Physical healing was easy when you had a group of loving, sometimes overbearing people making sure you were eating right, sleeping enough, and taking it easy. Their care was always unconditional, albeit a little much most days. The arguments that came up almost every day were annoying as hell, especially in the early days. Looking back, you wondered how anyone survived the stupid fights.

“Can you stop babying me for one fucking second?” The irritation in Cheol’s voice was heard all the way from your bedroom.

Seungcheol had been trying to make himself some food, crutches under his shoulders to keep him upright. Seungkwan had been hovering, anxious, worried he’d hurt himself. When he thought Cheol was struggling, but clearly wasn’t, he’d step in to ‘help’. Your boyfriend had brushed the other away, saying he could make a simple package of ramen without an issue. Truly, you had seen him perfect his technique of the one footed, crutch holding move of taking the pot off the heat and turning to place it on the kitchen island so he could eat just chilling there. He showed it off to you one night when he couldn’t sleep and wanted independence but your company. You got pretty decent ramen out of it. 

“But you are gonna drop the pot!” You’d come into the kitchen the moment Seungkwan raised his voice, standing closer than he should have been, that horribly stubborn attitude in full force against the oldest. “Just accept the help!” 

“I don’t need any help!” Cheol was louder than he probably meant to be, but his jaw was set tightly and the chopsticks he was using were clenched between his fist. “I can make a simple fucking thing and move it from one spot to another without your ass watching me like I’m going to break!” 

“You have one working foot and the balance of a damn deer.” 

You had pinched your nose and rubbed your eyes. You wanted one day without arguments, just one, but maybe Seungcheol’s idea of confining you in the house together wasn’t ideal. You weren’t going to stop it this time.

“Guys-” Chan had come into the kitchen not a moment after you, holding his hands up, ready to defuse the situation. “Maybe we should take a breath and calm down.” 

“And you’ve done it.” You had hit him in the back of the head and Chan looked like he was going to be shot point blank when the two set their eyes on him, fury there. 

“Calm down? Tell Seungkwan that! He won’t leave me the hell alone, I’m fine!” 

“Oh, don’t act all high and mighty because you are a big strong man, you can accept help!” 

You heard the cracking of the wooden chopsticks. Maybe you actually needed to deescalate the situation.  

“I can accept help if I need it! Which I don’t!” He tossed the now broken chopsticks on the counter in anger.  “Maybe if you minded your own nosy business, you’d see that I’m god damn capable of making a single, small pot of food! Not everyone wants or needs your help!” 

“Oh, I’m sorry that I’m trying to be nice!” 

“Nice?! You are being the most-” 

“Enough!” You cut Seungcheol off before he started to say things he would regret later. “Seungkwan, take a walk.” 

“Me?! I didn’t-” 

“Go!” 

Though pissed and clearly wanting to argue, Seungkwan stomped out of the kitchen and into the backyard, closing the sliding glass doors harder than necessary. You saw the slow, heavy movement of Seungcheol’s chest as he balanced in the kitchen, and you moved to the stove, taking the pot off the burner and placing it on the set out pot holder he placed down. 

“I’m not hungry anymore.” 

Oh, these men have tested your patience to no end. 

“I don’t give a shit, I’ll eat it.” You drummed your nails on the counter, raising a brow at him. “Go stew somewhere else then, it’s only been a few days and I’m over all the arguing. He cares because he saw his brother and leader hurt worse than ever before. Give him a break.” 

Seungcheol had gone off to his office and locked himself in for a good two hours. Seungkwan had come back, cooled off and a pout on his lips, wanting to explain himself but you really didn’t want to listen to it. When it became apparent they weren’t going to handle it themselves, you sent in the biggest reinforcements; Vernon and Mingyu.

You had ordered them to get Seungkwan and Seungcheol to talk, even if they held them at gunpoint. 

It had only taken twenty minutes for them to make up. Thank fucking god.

The hardest thing to heal was the mental scars, those took longer, more effect than anyone suspected. Nothing was surface level, everything ran nerve deep, the struggles between everyday life. 

For you, in the beginning, you were having nightmares again. Not violent and debilitating, but enough to disrupt your sleep, bring your mood down, mess with your anger. You had lashed out at Jun on accident once and spent the next day and a half apologizing. Sometimes you’d just need a day where no one bothered you, going into Pandora to play video games mostly undisturbed. The guys understood things better, gave each other space when it was needed, trusted each other to know they’d ask for help. 

The nightmares had shifted from the trauma and torment MX had put you through to replaying the final moments of Jooheon’s and Kihyun’s lives. Sometimes you could still feel the stickiness of their blood and needed a long shower at three, four in the morning just to stop your racing heart. Sometimes you’d flash back to the fire you set, watching the bodies burn to nothing. 

Your significant others were worried, but they weren’t much better some days. They had flinched at any sudden, loud noise. You almost didn’t notice it until the volume of movies were lowered during action movies and the sharp sound of doors slamming made them move inward. They tried to deny it, that they were fine, but you had been there, felt the fear, and they too lost sleep over their experiences.

Everyone struggled, communication had dropped, but Chan and you had spoken in depth about a group session with Tessa, knowing they wouldn’t do it on their own. Truth be told, it was one of your smartest decisions because honesty became a lot easier when it was known they weren’t alone in trying to figure things out. She was one of the greatest helps out there, coming to the house not long after the ‘break’ started and letting everyone say their peace. You all did two major sessions, the first to simply address the issues and the second to start fixing the problems.

Tessa had suggested that everyone found a real hobby on the forced-by-Seungcheol break. It worked out better than expected. 

Vernon, Minghao, and Jihoon got even more into music between rebuilding Ruby. Vernon had convinced Hao that he needed to go to a DJ set once the club reopened, and Minghao enjoyed the idea a lot more than he said out loud. Jeonghan started studying Japanese, starting over from his previous attempts to keep himself busy. Chan admitted to having some faceless dance cover page, which led to Seungkwan admitting he knew all along. Chan’s face had gone three different shades of red from that. 

Wonwoo took up more photography, going to different places and posting them anonymously online. He invited you on some of his trips once your arm got better, explaining how the camera he got for you worked, how to get the best pictures, and much more. You had to admit, his eye for photography was amazing, his attention to detail was unmatched. 

Mingyu and Joshua had made promises to get Jeonghan and Jihoon into cooking classes once the older two were healed up. Jeonghan and Jihoon complained that they didn’t need to know how to cook, but there was no arguing when the rest laughed in their faces (you included). You couldn’t deny that having Jeonghan learn to cook would be a good idea, it would take a bit off your shoulders even if you enjoyed the task. Jun and Minghao started to look into dance classes with Chan and Soonyoung, at the latter two’s suggestion. The two assassins were hesitant, but the group wide encouragement was enough to help get them to agree. 

Seungkwan, always the busy body, had found a recreational volleyball team, which gave Seokmin the brilliant idea to join a rec baseball team. They’d come home many days covered in sweat and dirty, and it was good to see them smile so brightly, enthusing about the games or practices. Seokmin made friends with a dad that coached a little league team and without any questions, he joined in and loved every second of it. Time was a lot easier to come by.

Seungcheol…he did the one thing no one thought he would do. 

He took a step back from SVT, but not really. It took a lot of time for Seungcheol to even agree to do that. It was more a task by Tessa to get some of the stress off his shoulders. 

Three months after the events of that night, he finally agreed to talk about the new division of jobs. It was a long and daunting conversation that you listened to, rather than participated in. Everyone was more than willing, and a schedule was started to get things back into action. With new hands on access to everyone, hobbies were still able to be participated in, and you believed the openness that Seungcheol asked for help with the new schedules in their lives. 

You…things were different for you. While you still loved all your previous hobbies, your mentality shifted.

Before Seungcheol allowed himself to give up some control, Rheia had reached out to you, wanting to discuss the future of her empire. Over the months, you knew you were going to agree, you had ideas of what you wanted to do, to start with, and the expectations you wanted out of your own group. You didn’t do it alone, at least the thinking parts of it all. Seungcheol, Joshua, and Jeonghan happily helped, along with the rest of the guys when you asked their opinions. 

But you wanted to do many things yourself, to prove to yourself and others that you could do it. 

You didn’t hesitate to accept everything Rheia had to offer; money, businesses, property, and more. You were handed a silver platter and you didn’t let anything go to waste. 

Jihoon didn’t want to agree at first, but he did let Lex leave his clubs to become your second. While the woman loved her job, things got hard with her taking care of Sona. 

With the support of SVT, you, and Lex, Sona had progressed well thanks to the better medical treatment, but it became apparent that she’d never be who she was before. While she gained a lot of independence, she would need a wheelchair most days since her legs never fully recovered. Short distance walking was great, she was so proud of herself, but the long distance and standing too long was difficult. You were glad to hear Sona was in therapy with Tessa, and her mentality had changed when she realized how much support and help she had. You learned of a ‘meal train’ that some of Lex’s and Sona’s friends started and you couldn’t help yourself (with Mingyu’s help before your shoulder was okay) to send food over. She had always been a fighter and you did everything to keep her eyes bright.

Your first matter of business was simple, offer Sona one thing she could call her own, with your help: her own hair salon. You owed her, and you handed her a blank check as she pleased. She was given a large space, enough room to get every accessibility accommodation she needed to fulfill her dream. It ended up being the main stop for many of your friends to get their hair done.

Rheia was smart in her business, focusing on high real estate, loan services, and had a huge trade portfolio. She donated large amounts of money to local rehab facilities constantly and supported medical clinics for low income communities, like ATZ did. She owned three high end restaurants and co-owned multiple others. You thought you’d be drowning after the first week, but Rheia didn’t leave you high and dry thankfully. She made the transition as easy as she could, giving you an extensive list of what was handled by who, who to contact for questions, and anything else. Lex and you had many sessions at the now shared Lex-Sona apartment, papers scattered on the floor, trying to figure it all out. 

There were plenty of bumps in the road at first, fuck ups you openly admitted to your new group, apologized for, and did everything in your power to fix. There were plenty of sleepless nights where one of your boyfriends (or all of them) had to drag you to bed. One night, after three days of no sleep, Jeonghan did tell you he was giving you some over the counter sleeping meds, even if you didn’t want them. You struggled just as much as the next, but at least you were honest. 

That being said, moving forward still wasn’t linear. 

Everyone in that fight recovered, scars littering skin, memories flashing back. 

Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Joshua healed well, took physical therapy seriously, and could go about their normal days without much issue. Seungcheol and Joshua struggled the most with the extent of the injuries to their legs. Some days they would be great, able to tackle anything the world threw their way, and other days they needed rest, winced when they stood for too long, leaned on their good side more than anything. The first winter was the worst over all, many days resting or complaining. Wonwoo refused to bend down for a while with the damage to his side, the gritting of his teeth as he moved during the early days was enough for many to have sympathy for him. 

Seonghwa was left with a thick scar over his eye and cheek. Though his eye healed, his eye sight took a hit and he needed glasses or contacts to correct the vision he lost. San and Wooyoung had called it badass, said it made him look ‘sick as fuck’. You had to agree with them, but knew he struggled at first since he couldn’t see well. Hongjoong had a slight limp, not noticeable unless you really watched him, he hid it well, new people meeting him definitely couldn’t tell. 

Siyeon was a stubborn bitch, but she listened to the doctor's advice to take care of herself. While her arm healed, it took a good while for her to get back to sewing and designing. Sometimes the weight of just using her arm was enough for her to give up and rest, even if she didn’t want to. Minji took more time to get back to fully functioning. Her head injury ended up causing issues with memory a few days after she woke up, dizzy spells and fits of anger from a concussion. The burns she sustained weren’t pretty, she had described them as damning and ugly at first. She had to be careful moving to keep the integrity of her healing skin good. Gahyeon lost a lot of blood that night, requiring multiple transfusions and a lot of stitches. She was ordered not to move with the deep cut to her abdomen, and leaving bed to just go to the bathroom was enough to send her to tears for weeks. You visited a few times when one of the guys had business in the city, just laying in bed beside her, watching TV, getting her what she needed, and she appreciated all the attention she got. 

99 line did get one sleep over at the DC house, all crowding into the room, boisterous and lovingly annoying, and Gahyeon had cried because it felt normal even if she was horribly uncomfortable. Wooyoung was more than happy being a cuddle bug, even if she didn’t want to admit she needed it. After Gahyeon had healed, some complications came to light, some physical limitations since, and roles within DC had shifted, and she was given the job of being a head of their fronting businesses, which gave her the slower pace she needed. 

Chris was a trooper through his injuries from what Changbin had said, taking the burn care and femur break seriously. He did try to start walking a bit too early, causing some setbacks that he rectified the best he could. Minho was alright once his ankle and side healed, taking the soreness and pain in stride. Hyunjin complained a lot as he recovered. Changbin couldn’t stop himself from venting into the 99 line group chat about it, not that anyone minded. The group chat was just venting for a while after, rightfully so, and the support was welcoming.

Soobin and Yeonjun were the most unscathed through everything. TXT lended hands when they could, grateful to still be around thanks to the joint effort of each group. 

Each group rebuilt, it took time, but they did. It wasn’t rushed, a delicate process with even more delicate procedures to get it right. You fit your group snuggly in that calm chaos of it, continuing to build alongside them without clashing, no stepping on toes. You joked that you wanted to be allies instead of enemies and Hongjoong had rolled his eyes when you met him that day. 

A year into everything, you had to say you were set, everything was running as smoothly as a rebranded mafia group could. Valkyries, all women still, and you told yourself it sounded cool. You added to your business, opening a domestic violence shelter and partnering with Minji’s firm to get pro bono work for any legal issues those who came in needed help. You continued to fund the rehab places Rheia did, and the clinics, even other community spaces that needed help, anonymously. With the help of Mingyu, Seokmin, Chris, and Minho, you invested in the stock market cautiously and came out on top. 

The other leaders continued to make one joke the entire time; when would your meeting with Psy be? One they all had during the rise of their groups, an informational meeting. Psy hadn’t announced his full replacement to the public, keeping the information quiet on who it would be, and there was no change in his group's priorities at that point. You knew he had someone calling the shots since before the Gala so long ago, but he was still the face of everything. 

It came on a random weekday evening, sitting in your apartment with Seungcheol and Joshua at your sides, waiting for Jeonghan to come home to figure out dinner. The knock was unexpected, usually your friends walked right in without a care in the world. Even Lex and Sona didn’t bother with knocking anymore. Though in the safety of your own home, you did grab a gun you usually stashed in the coffee table drawer, tucking it into your waist band as you peered through the peephole. It was a strange man, official looking, pristine suit, clean shaven, standing with his hands clasped in front of him. When you answered the door, the man gave a respectful bow, pulling the envelope from his jacket pocket with barely a word, only a ‘he will be expecting you’ and left with no flourish. 

Similar to the card Seungcheol had shown you over a year ago to attend the masquerade ball, it was simple; just your name, a respectable request for your time, a location, and a date and time.

“When is it?” Seungcheol didn’t even need to know who it was from to know what it was. 

“Tomorrow evening.” You scratched the back of your neck, returning to the couch, placing your gun aside. “Private dinner, do I bring Lex?” 

Joshua snatched the card from your hand, reading over the intricate hand writing. “Doesn’t say to, so I wouldn’t.” 

“Jeonghan’s gonna be pissed, it’s his date night.” The other snickered, tossing his arm over your shoulders, dragging you into his side.

You grunted in response at first, pulling your legs up onto the couch. “I’ll never hear the end of it.” 

Joshua pats your leg, but that didn’t help the evil grin on his face. Anything to fuck with Jeonghan, even at your expense sometimes. “Especially with how busy you’ve been. Who knows when you can reschedule.” 

“You both are assholes. You all have decently equal time now.” 

“But,” Seungcheol grinned wide. “Now he has one less day until it is made up.” 

You arrived at the restaurant early, sitting in your car for a few minutes before it was appropriate to head in a bit before the given reservation. Psy was already there, a private room in an upscale place, a cheery smile on his face as you entered, giving him a bow, but he only took your hand and greeted you like old friends. He started the awkward small talk, asking about your days, your recovery from the fight, how the year has been. 

“You look well.” He sounded and looked genuine, sitting comfortably across from you. “When Rheia told me she was going to hand her businesses over to you, I was sceptical at first, concerned. I always thought it would be someone she had known professionally for years.” 

“I don’t blame you. Some days I still wonder if she was right to pick me.” 

“When word came through the grapevine that SVT had brought a new person into their group after being established for so long, I got curious, did my own digging. When I learned you were Rheia’s neighbor, an orphaned girl with probably more intelligence than she let on, I couldn’t stop myself from keeping an eye out. She spoke highly of you before she even knew you were a member of SVT.” Psy had a sweetness to him, fatherly, sharp as a tack. “Over my time of observation, I truly met you at the second ball I held, and you had this fire in your eyes that many have, a need for something, and I see you now, established and thriving, healed for the most part, and you wear those scars with pride.” 

You couldn’t say he was wrong, you didn’t care anymore about the scars that littered your body, the burn scar on your chest that took ages to look better. They were the armor that didn’t need to hide from the light anymore. You’ve grown and survived the worst of the worst. There was a good chance there wasn’t much you were afraid of at this point in time. 

“I think Rheia was right picking you now, seeing what you’ve done in a year is quite admirable, how you keep the integrity of what she had started while shifting things to fit your prerogative better. I’d like to see what you are capable of in the future with your greatest threat eliminated. However, never think there isn’t a looming threat.” 

“Not everything has to be bad,” You started, tilting your head side to side in thought. “I know what I do is bad, and I’ve had to hurt those stopping me to get where I am, even just this last year alone, but I want to give back because I hurt others. Call it repenting if you will. I will never clear my conscience, but I will do everything I can to make up for it for every person I need to hurt.” 

“Being self-aware of what happens around you, and how your actions affect others, are the signs of a good leader. I have no doubts you will succeed.”

Psy had given you helping advice, simple things that kept him alive and safe while growing up in the business. Advice you took into high consideration and used quite often in your day to day life as time went on. 

You had to say the start of your second year as a mafia boss was easier. You had a system that Lex complimented perfectly and you understood why Jihoon was reluctant to see her go. You offered a compromise to him, involving Lex, about her taking shifts at the newly reopened Ruby, which she didn’t turn down. 

“Who wouldn’t like extra cash?” 

You couldn’t deny that.

Rheia checked in when she could, off traveling the world in her retirement. It was nice to still have her there if you struggled or needed reassurance outside of your friends. Sona’s salon was thriving, especially with the accessibility to more people. She had many stylists under her, all working hard and gaining experience, and all were welcome. She worked with you to give low income or homeless people haircuts for free during certain weekends a month. 

You had joked that the world was healing one fucked up choice after another. Things felt like they were good, and you always promised nothing was too good. 

You’ve gained more girls in the process, the need for more people as you expanded quickly, ones brought in with a choice, always a choice, something you were known for, and their call names were always fun to find out or give. 

Dove and Doll were ‘stolen’ from ATZ, looking for different work within the same aspect of the mafia but nothing too extreme. Hongjoong fought for a while about handing them over, offering to double, triple their salaries, but they insisted on going to you. He never let you live it down, but nothing like a favor being owed to a good friend. Favors ran the world in many cases. Fae and Luna, two women from SVT, fell into your lap when the money wasn’t an issue but the new and exciting adventure was. Seungkwan and Soonyoung were pissed the most when the two came forward wanting a change, learning they were their ‘work wives’ and needed them. The women both rolled their eyes and you just put your hands up in defense even if the two men were sulking for so long after. Hyunjin was annoyed when three of SKZ’s crewmates, Maya, LB, and Lily, decided to switch as well, offended on a level only a dramatic man could be. Minho almost got into a fight with you over LB, his ‘work wife’, because she was so knowledgeable in their business.  

“Out of everyone, you had to take Fae.” Seungkwan sat in the office of your warehouse, arms crossed, a scowl drawn flat on his lips. “I can’t believe it.” 

Said woman had just left the office, hurrying off to handle a task since Lex was busy for the evening. You were no better being stuck at your desk for hours on end to finish off the never ending paperwork. You had to give it to Cheol on doing most of it alone for so long. Usually Lex would handle half of it at least, but circumstances messed with that the last few days. You didn’t mind, but you weren’t truly happy about it. 

“I didn’t do anything, Seungkwan.” Your eyes raised for a moment, seeing the glare he had pinning you down. You’ve seen that glare plenty of times and you weren’t scared of it. You weren’t really scared of anything anymore. “Fae approached me first and asked if I had a spot for her. I didn’t even ask Seungcheol if he would open the floor to let people change over.” 

“No, you just put your little lady talons into their minds and peel their ability to say no away.” He made claws with his hands, making the motion of peeling something back. “Unbelievable, I lost my best friend outside of you idiots and my best supervisor.” 

“You act like you are dating her, Seungkwan. If you want her so bad, break up with Vernon and-” 

“I know for a fact that your polyamory, bisexual ass did not just tell me to pick!” He gasped, nearly falling out of his chair from his own dramatics. 

“Oh my god.” You placed two fingers to each side of your head, rubbing your temples. “You are so annoying, dude. Are you hearing yourself?” 

“And for your information, Vernon and I are very happy-”

“Oh I know!” You tossed your head back with laughter, letting out a pitiful, quietly cracking scream. “You guys aren’t really quiet about it!” 

“Shut up! You and your three boy-toys have no shame and decency!” He tossed his hands up in the air, standing with a flourish, only to start pacing. “I’m surprised you can walk half the time! Seriously, do you ever get a fucking break?!” 

“Are you really arguing about this now? I have work to do!” 

“Yeah, working with a broken back and a sore pu-” 

“Boo Seungkwan, if you finish that sentence, I will kill you.” 

“I’m not wrong! I don’t know how you don’t limp!” 

“Why is this the topic you want to focus on!?” 

“Because I’m mad you stole Fae!” 

“Get out of my office!” 

“No!” 

Jeonghan, Joshua, and Seungcheol had wanted you to get a break towards the end of the second year, seeing how tired you were many nights. With the redistribution of SVT’s jobs, they had more free time, but they didn’t mean you did anymore. Dates were still happening, even if they got pushed back a few hours, and most nights went from you being in bed first before your take over to you crawling into bed hours after they had fallen asleep. But they were understanding of the situation, and more than willing to work around your schedule. You wouldn’t tell them you were back to surviving on energy drinks and takeout for lunch. They would have betrayed you in a heartbeat. 

The spring at the start of your third year, two years since taking over as a mafia boss, just over two since Monsta X was ended, a seal invitation card came from Psy. It had been three years since the gala that got you into your new life, nearly three years since you met more of the most important people in your life, and you were doing it all over again. You didn’t want to open it until you got home.

“I’m back.” You called out, stepped into the house from the garage for the first time all week at a reasonable hour, away from the city for the weekend thanks to Lex and a few others. 

“Dinner’s almost done.” Minghao called back, leaning back against the counter. It smelled wonderful and you were starving. “You’ve been busy.”

“Horribly busy, but Lex is a champ and is taking the weekend so I can take a breather.” You already felt the tension in your shoulders ebb away, finding Jun, Vernon, and Seokmin in the living room, hanging out on the couch, TV on. They greeted you with small smiles and waves. “Everyone else coming?” 

“On their way, should be here soon. Seungcheol’s in his office finishing some things. An invitation from Psy came.” Minghao added, eyes always watching, but there was a softness there, something that had grown since the day MX was ended. Something shifted that neither of you wanted to talk about, maybe the trauma of it all, maybe how you’ve both changed – how everyone changed.

You made your way down the familiar halls, little changed in the last few years, but every day you were here felt more like home, the place you could relax and be yourself. Your apartment was nice, it only got better with time and money, but as time went on, it still felt like a space you still had to work, had to be ‘on’, had to be Valkyrae’s leader. The tightness in your muscles, the overthinking, it dissipated when home, less worry, more…safety and security. 

The door to Seungcheol’s office was cracked, an invitation to go in, and you peered inside, seeing him reading something, glasses on for once. He was dressed down, suit exchanged for an oversized sweater you got him in the last year and probably sweat pants. There was a pout on his lips, a familiar furrow of his brow, a focus in his eyes as he read over the paper in his hand. You almost felt bad disturbing him, let him get his work done, but maybe the distraction-

“You forget that I have eyes everywhere. I know you are there.” 

You scoffed, pushing the door open as he tossed the paper down, along with his glasses. His face relaxed and a smile spread, motioning you over with a small hand gesture, and you went towards him willingly, soft, socked feet quiet on the wood floor. You rounded the desk and he gathered you in his arms, legs spread so you could stand between them. He wrapped his arms tight around your waist and pressed his face into your abdomen, sighing contently.

“You’re home earlier than I thought.” You ran your nails through his hair, eyes closing with a calm hum. “You look tired.”

“I am, but I can sleep all I want tonight.” He further leaned into you with each thread of your hand in his hair. “Hao said Psy sent an invitation. I did too.” 

“Hate that you aren’t technically SVT anymore, can’t see you getting all dressed up.” 

You placed your bag on the desk and took the envelope out, tearing open the wax seal and reading over the invitation, snickering to yourself. 

“All blue theme? Is he trying to have some sad atmosphere?” 

“Don’t know.” He leaned his head back, chin resting against you. “Don’t particularly care right now, not until I need to talk to Siyeon.” 

Placing the invitation aside, you leaned down to kiss his forehead, continuing to hear that happy hum as you basked in the comfort of his embrace. 

For the first time in days, you had slept peacefully, deeply, curled between Jeonghan and Joshua with Seungcheol somewhere on the other side of one of them. It was dreamless, a development that came a year into being free from MX’s. No more nightmares, but less dreams, and you were happy for it, sleep coming easier the longer it had been. You were just too busy over thinking about your own work now to sleep. You didn’t wake up until early afternoon the next day and only moved from the bed to the couch to stay in the state of relaxation. Jun and you had watched a movie before Seungkwan and Seokmin wanted to watch some new episode of a show. Minghao and Vernon had joined in to break from their routine, along with Wonwoo and Chan. As the day went on, everyone was settling in the living room, a new movie rented and take-out containers in hand.

You loved it. You loved them. And you never felt happier than in the moment. 

The one thing you did miss was just having time – proper time – for friends. The weekends you could get at the house were a breath of fresh air, along with the time you could steal at a dinner with 99 line or breakfast with one of your significant others. You missed the simplicity of life before being a big boss, but deep in your bones, deep in your heart, you couldn’t change it any other way. Compromises and accommodations were made, which you were grateful for. More often than not, friends started to come to you; lunch brought in when you couldn’t leave your office by Wooyoung and Yeosang, late night stops at a diner when you’ve cleaned blood from your hands and exchanged your nicer clothes for sweatpants, and your favorite pass time when the weather was nice and you could, sitting outside, talking with whoever was with you. 

Siyeon and Gahyeon were still at the dress shop, working long days but enjoyed the work between DC’s business. When you called them on that Monday, asking for six different outfits to be made for the gala, they screamed into the phone that they were excited to get it done, even if they’d be exhausted later. You had to rearrange some schedules to get Lex, Sona, Fae, LB, Doll, and yourself free enough to get to the dress shop, which…ended up with more time being used because no one could stop talking (and champagne was had). You didn’t complain, especially not when you got to lay down on one of the couches and yap for way more than three hours instead of doing shit in heels all day. It had been a good day, with an excitement in the air from the other five women with you being asked to be faces of your mafia group. Sona had tried to talk you out of it for her, but you weren’t having any of that. You owed her too much.

You and your small group of women had met with the two designers, and their assistants, multiple times before the gala, and you had run into others from your allied groups in passing for their own outfits, managing to spare moments to simply chat, catch up on the mundane. Hongjoong had come in early and had a fit when Siyeon called the suit idea he had boring, which you did end up staying and watching before being dragged into the conversation.

With the fact that groups were preparing for a large event, business within the mafia had slowed down for a period of time, and you opted for a limited staff rotation, knowing you wouldn’t need to worry as much. The fronting businesses were still running at full capacity, but you did give them a small pay bump with how well business had been overall. You didn’t mind it, nor did they. You only cared that everyone was happy in the long run of things. 

Sona had insisted on everyone getting their hair and nails done at her salon a few days prior to the gala, closing up early but kept stylists on to get everyone taken care of. You knew most of the women by name, seeing as you handled the pay for Sona, and turned it into a much needed girls night of gossip for all of you. The space wasn’t for any mafia talks, almost none of the stylists were part of that end of the business, and there was a mutual agreement after that it was nice to feel like a normal woman once and a while. Sona had also promised to be the one handling hair before the gala while she hired one of her workers to handle the make up. You questioned if she’d be tired with all the moving, but she insisted she wouldn’t do anything to hurt herself. 

SVT was a little upset that you were getting ready at your apartment, deeming it girls only for the evening, given how they reacted last time to your all dressed up for the first gala. 

“Beep beep, I got the shot glasses!” Lex hollered, half in her pantsuit, shirt barely buttoned properly, pants a little rumpled, and her usually wild, ear length hair wet to be styled whenever her turn was. She was holding a plate with the shot glasses on it, full to the brim, balanced on one hand in the middle of your living room, moving around the make-up artist working on Fae. “Pregame, ladies.” 

“Tequila? Again?” Fae had cringed but took a glass as the rest were passed around by your right hand woman. 

“Last time it was moonshine, excuse you.” Lex fired back, handing you a shot, along with LB, Doll, and Sona. She gave the latter woman a small kiss to her temple as she was working on LB’s hair. 

You did down the shot, your first of the night and thankful you had food earlier, and made a disgusted sound in the back of your throat. “We can not show up to this shit faced, Lex.” 

“It’s just one, I promise.” 

LB scoffed, clinking her glass with Sona’s before she swallowed it down, only a small grimace on her face. Sona was quick to return to the finishing touches of her hair, spraying the perfect curls down with hairspray. “Please remind her of that when she sees an open bar.” 

“Oh please,” Sona patted LB’s shoulders and the other stood, the second to have both hair and make up done, moving around you so you could sit down second to last. “The worst that will happen is that she tries to get behind the bar.” 

“Babe, that was one time.” Lex put her hands up in defense, a loop sided grin on her face, “And it was fun.” 

“‘Fun’ she says as she had nearly fought the bartender for under pouring.” You rolled your eyes, relaxing as Sona started her work on styling your hair into a neat, layered up-do with curled tendrils hanging down here and there. She had insisted when she saw the final outcome of your dress. 

“One time!” 

“Can you please put your clothes on properly so Sage can do your make up?” Sona huffed, starting the process to pull and pin your hair into place. “This shouldn’t take me too long since Mo already curled her hair.” 

Lex rolled her eyes and went to grab her blazer and shoes, mockingly speaking. “Oh look at me, I’m the big boss and I think ahead.” 

“This brings back old memories.” Sona snickered, comfortable behind you, sitting in a chair while your chair spun so she didn’t need to move much any expend unnecessary energy. 

“For a terrifying night? Oh yeah.” She laughed along with you, moving you to and fro to do what she needed. “But you did make me look amazing, I can never forget that.” 

Sona was quick and meticulous with your hair, shaping it exactly like all the pictures she had sent you days ago, adding a few silver hair pieces into the weaving of the style. When she was satisfied and Sage had finished with LB, you moved into place for your make up. Sage was a quiet one, a long time friend of Sona’s who was looking for a more stable job space and landed in the salon not too long ago. They were nice, didn’t ask many questions, and did their job well.

Sona had done her own hair and make up, saying she’d work on Lex as well for both. She was determined tonight to not use her wheelchair or crutches, since she wanted a dress rather than a suit, but both aids would be in the truck if needed at any point. You had reached out to Psy when you first decided to invite Sona, and he was more than happy to accommodate the best he could. She had been keeping herself rested for this night. 

The SVT group chat was blowing up, sending you pictures of their varying blue suits, all unbelievably, creatively them, and they were animated already just based on the text messages. Jeonghan, Joshua, and Seungcheol tried to message you in the Foursome (that name had, somehow, never changed in the years) for pictures, but all you sent back was your very pretty, silver shoes to match your dress. 

As Siyeon and Gahyeon had always done, the dresses and singular suit were phenomenal. There was an agreement that you’d each have a feature of silver in your outfits, and they complimented each other naturally. Though you could wear any shade of blue, you all leaned towards the darker, deeper shades. Lex and Sona were in matching Egyptian blue, silver woven into Sona’s skirt and Lex’s lapels in similar designs. Fae wanted cerulean blue a-line dress, the ‘brightest’ color of your group, off the shoulder sleeves and silver in the bodice. LB settled for a medium blue, column dress with, simply silver straps and a matching, thin belt.

You opted for something more…standout-ish. You were the leader! How could you not?

Your inspiration was Madame X, only in a true navy blue. A similar style bodice to the infamous painting that cut deep around to your sternum, silver straps that were fashion tapped to your shoulders so they wouldn’t slip off. The skirt was different from the painting, flaring out to the floor with a rather devious slit up the front of your left leg. The fabric was ruched and  gathered up by your natural waist, held there by a beautiful cascade of silver filigree of gems that reached the hem at the floor. You had a silver statement necklace, made by Siyeon, that sparkled under any bright light. Gahyeon had a lot of fun with the construction of the dress and took many pictures for the shop’s portfolio that she hadn’t posted yet. 

“Can you even breathe in that?” LB asked, watching you walk back into the living room after everything was on.

“Nope.” You laughed, looking over all of them with bright eyes, feeling content and light. “Everyone ready?” 

The grand hall hadn’t changed since you had been there long ago for the masquerade event with Seungcheol, still as beautiful and striking as it was years ago. You could feel the others' excitement in your bones as you stepped out of the SUVs, but they managed to keep their faces neutral, shoulders back and chins high. You remember being there once, hiding the nerves and anxiety that course violently through your veins. No one really prepared you, and you tried your best over the last few days to prepare them. Based on the cars pulling in behind you, you weren’t last, but you weren’t on top, fashionably late. 

You moved first, ascending the polished steps with years of grace and strength under your belt. Fae and LB were right behind you, with Lex and Sona at the back, taking the steps slowly so no one lagged behind and Sona didn’t feel like she had to rush. The open doors to the hall allowed you to hear the chitter chatter inside, not overly loud but enough that you couldn’t make out what was being said. You were escorted inside by an attendant and there was the distinct feeling of eyes on you and your group. 

It was obvious when you glanced to the side that SVT was already looking, and it only made you stand taller, each step more deliberate than the last. Your table, Valkyries' table, was placed near ATZ and SVT, close to an exit and a bathroom for convenience at Psy’s suggestion for Sona’s sake. You crossed the dance floor behind the attendant, heels seemingly loud on the floor, and the smirk that was already on your face was only growing. You made sure everyone else sat before you did, hearing your women whisper and mutter to one another at your small table. 

“I’m gonna throw up.” Fae huffed, sitting properly, back straight. “Like, actually.” 

“Well,” Lex jerked her thumb out the door to the hall behind you. “The bathroom is right there.” 

“For my sanity’s sake,” You bit back the smile you wanted to flash. “Please do not bicker all night.” 

“Tell that to her.” LB motioned to Lex, speaking low. “She starts it.” 

“I left one group of toddlers and swapped them for another.” 

Speaking of your toddlers, you turned to find SVT, giving a slight wiggle of your fingers towards them in a wave. Seokmin and Mingyu held up both hands with thumbs up, nodding like idiots. Seungkwan had to swat at their hands to stop them from definitely looking stupid. Your eyes scanned the first table for your significant others, finding all three racking over your form with three very different emotions. They didn’t look half bad themselves and you’d let them know that later. You’d be getting a ride back with them to the house while the rest of your small group were taken home by the two drivers. 

“Can they at least try to keep it in their pants?” Sona leaned over, whispering in your ear, and you had to turn away to stop yourself from laughing, hiding behind LB’s shoulder.  

“Tell that to Lex.” 

And truth be told, Lex wasn’t fairing any better, all heart eyed at Sona. 

When every seat was full, Psy swooped in per usual, in a powder blue suit and your gaze drifted to his table and Rheia was there, a proud smile on her face when your eyes met. 

“Good evening, everyone!” Psy’s bright voice filled the space and your eyes returned to him, settling into your seat. He seemed so in his element, glowing under the attention. “Thank you to everyone for attending this evening, it has been quite a long time since I’ve gathered everyone! There are new faces littering the tables today, so please mingle and enjoy the night.” 

“Does that mean we can eat?” Lex whispered and you did crack a smile then, the buffet set up towards the front of the hall along with the bar.

“Yeah, but we don’t go until a few groups go, out of respect. We are new.” 

“Two years ain’t new. Especially since there is a legacy thing happening with you taking over.” Fae wanted to argue but you shook your head. 

“New leadership, you are all new faces.” 

Once a few older groups did start move and serve themselves, you unleashed the hounds to put it lightly and let them go off, taking your time to stand. You felt the hands before you saw them, one wrapping around your waist and pulling you into a firm chest. The cologne you had purchased for Seungcheol wasn’t too strong, but you knew the smell anywhere, looking up at him with a quiet hum. 

“You look incredible.” He murmured, placing a kiss to your lips, fingers under your chin to keep you from looking away. “From the moment you walked in.” 

“Couldn’t wait five minutes, huh?” You stole a second kiss before pushing him back with a hand to his chest. Over his shoulder, Jeonghan, Joshua, and the rest were already moving to get food. “Collect yourself, King, this is a professional event.” 

Seungcheol scoffed, hand still on your waist. “I think we can be very professional in the nearest closet, Mouse.” 

“Really subtle there, hotshot.” You patted his chest and moved a smidge further away. “Will you be nasty or a gentleman and help me to the buffet line?” 

Seungcheol did the kind thing and extended his bent arm for you, letting your hand rest in the crook as he walked you towards the long row of tables. He did give a very childish smirk to Joshua and Jeonghan when they saw who was on his arm, and you hit him on the chest. Jihoon had found Lex and Sona, helping when he could as they chatted in line. 

Unlike the last gala, the energy in the air tonight wasn’t as tense or heavy. There was more ease, a playfulness to the words passing back and forth between the bodies. There were more smiling and less postured smirks and harsh glances. You didn’t feel the need to feel so uptight, but you didn’t let your guard down. With your previous experience, talking to new faces was easier, more comfortable, and riveting. You ate with your group before going off to mingle and do business in less hushed tones but no malice or expectation that anyone needed to do anything. You wanted to attribute it to the collective effort to remove a larger, hostile problem years ago, remembering the sharp eyes on you at the first gala you attended. 

You spoke to and hung around your friends, complimenting their outfits and styling. Hongjoong had dyed his hair a striking deep blue, brighter than his suit but complimentary. Seonghwa had grown his hair out, shaggy and wolf-cut like, and he looked amazing in the cut of his suit. Chris had cut his hair short, and Felix was a very pretty blond if you had to admit it. Everyone looked good, and it felt more like a social gathering than a business transaction.

You were in the middle of listening to Mingyu go on and on about something he thought was hilarious, leaning into Jeonghan’s side with both his arm and Joshua’s around your waist. Wonwoo was quiet, additional commentary to hopefully get the giant to his point, but the clearing of someone’s throat pulled you away. 

Rheia stood at the side of the group, calm and poised, with a small smile on her lips. “May I steal her away for a moment?” 

Though Jeonghan looked reluctant, he and Joshua placed gentle kisses to the top of your head before letting you go, being pulled into a hug by the older woman and swept away to walk the room arm in arm. 

“You look well compared to the last time I saw you a few months ago.” She started, eyes trailing the room before glancing to you.

“Proper sleep will do that to a person.” You laughed, letting her lead you about the throng of people. “You look tanner and ready to leave for your next destination trip.” 

Her skin was a tad darker, knowing she was in a hot, sunny location for the last few weeks based on her text messages. “I leave tomorrow for Thailand, sue me. I’m enjoying my retirement.”  

“And you came here before that?” 

“Psy is making an announcement before everyone leaves tonight then things start to change. I wanted to be here for him and his wife one last time. Once he leaves, I’m fully stepping out from this life. I know you heard my daughter is getting married.” 

You did hear the news, an invitation sitting on your desk and date already marked in your calendar for the winter. She had met a lovely person and were set to marry by the end of the year and start their joint lives together. Over the last two years, you both got closer, stopping your therapy sessions and moving to a strictly platonic friendship-sister type bond. She had introduced you to her partner as her ‘chosen sister’ and you nearly cried at the idea. You were going to walk in her wedding as a bridesmaid, even though she asked you to be her maid of honor. 

“Oh trust me, I know everything.” You knew your notifications were probably blowing up in that new group chat. “I’ll miss seeing you around once and a while.” 

“For you, I’ll answer any questions still, but I don’t think you need my help anymore, Mouse. You’ve done a good job figuring things out and being resourceful. I have no doubts in the future that you will continue to grow and succeed. Trust yourself and your girls, and you’ll make it through.” 

You stopped her at the edge of the room, taking both her hands in yours, giving a bow of your head. “I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me, even before when you were just my neighbor. You’ve done more for me than you think.” 

“No need for that, sweetie.” She lifted your head before giving both of your hands tight squeezes. “You only needed some help. You would have figured it all out on your own even without me.” 

The night went on with joy and laughter, moving between friends and new faces to familiarize yourself within the underground community. You didn’t deny that business was struck between you and some groups, being introduced by your allies to their allies to hopefully work together with them or assist them in the future if the day ever came. Psy had spoken with you briefly, asking how you enjoyed the night, asking how business was, and he managed to tell you some silly jokes that earned laughter. You said hello to his wife when he separated, waving them off for the evening.

This life was yours, even with how lawless and turbulent it could be at times. It brought a rush to your veins, a thrill that communed your nerves and hesitations. 

You were no longer the fearful, overworked, and underappreciated woman that was stupid enough to stumble into SVT. You were no longer the woman that was nervous to fire a gun or stab a person, to get blood on your hands when it was necessary. 

You had a found family, three amazing, caring boyfriends, and more friends you could ever manage to handle. You younger self would be both horrified and stunned by the strong person you’ve become, albeit the trauma and torment that got you here.

You were happy and free, smiling among the people that now knew you like the back of their hand, that you let in and allowed to see the smallest and saddest parts of you. You no longer lived in someone’s shadow. You thrived and shined in the light of those around you.

Psy called everyone’s attention towards the head of the room, standing on a slightly raised platform, microphone in hand. He was grinning wide, the apples of his cheeks prominent in the room’s lightning. 

“I’d like to thank everyone again who came tonight and spent your evening with me. It has been a pleasure being your host for as many years as I’ve been.” He looked across the room almost fondly, eyes landing on different faces, a gentleness to his gaze that was warming. “But tonight is the last night I will be hosting for all of you. Today, after multiple years, I have decided to fully pass the torch.” 

Psy motioned to the side and a man at his table, a foxy looking man, older than you, maybe a little older than Seungcheol, dressed in a well fitting, navy blue suit. His hair was styled back, looking almost effortlessly swept back but held in place with some sort of hairspray of gel. He looked almost in a constant state of tiredness, definitely a ‘resting bitch face’ if you had to place a name to it, but he didn’t look mad, just…bored in a way. He stepped up to Psy’s side, and you recognized him but you couldn’t tell from where or how. 

The two men shared a tight embrace, and a smile placed on the familiar man’s face, speaking quietly before Psy spoke again. 

“Many of you might recognize him, he had been working with me for the last few years to fully understand and work with the things I have perfected for many years. I’ll let him introduce himself.” 

The mic was handed off and the man’s husky voice came through clear.

“As Psy had said, many of you might recognize me, I was a member of GOT7 before we – somewhat – parted ways.” He stood tall, and you remembered seeing him at the first gala, but never learned his name in the moment. “While Psy might be ending this party here, I’m all for celebrating my rise to the occasion with a little champagne.” 

Around you, servers came around with flutes of champagne, the gold tinted liquid sparkling in the chandelier light. 

“My name is Jackson Wang, and let’s party!”

Tag List

All: @smiileflower @ateez-atiny380 @starrias @markslap @celizh04

You know, I never thought I'd ever actually finish Blood Stained Hands. But, I need to start from the beginning of how BSH came to be.

My friend, Nic, or @doahaesunshine if you will, had made one joke. The joke you ask? "Tristen, I dare you to write a Mafia Jeonghan x Reader. I bet you won't."

And I took that personally as you could tell.

So, originally, BSH was supposed to be only a Jeonghan x Reader. Cheol and Joshua were no where to be seen, but as I started to develop the plot points and how things naturally evolved, they were added. I used to use what I called my 'little back book', and I write down so many things, which turned into the BSH you know today. There was a lot of my editor, Mel ( @pinkskiddo ), yelling at me day in and day out. I have made them cry (which...i'm not 100% sorry for).

I want to take Mel and Nic for being my lovely editors and friends. I honestly don't think BSH would have ever been finished without them! They helped me a lot and have supported me through all the crazy, fucked up ideas that came up while writing this story. Seriously could not have done this without them <3

On March 26, 2023, I opened a Google Doc and started writing while I was taking college classes lmao (and sometimes writing in class, shhh). BSH....she ended up breaking two full Doc files, like, I couldn't write anymore without the entire doc lagging. BSH ended up spanning 3 google docs, 5 front to back college rule notebooks (things I write by hand then transferred to digital), the little back book, and my sanity. In total, the page count on normal letter sized pages for the docs is 827. EIGHT HUNDRED TWENTY-SEVEN FUCKING PAGES. We've broken over 390k words too. Dear god. I don't even want to know what it would be if i changed it to A5.

And yes, Blood Stained Hands ended on a Jackson Wang joke. It's been in the making since, like, chapter 16, at the OG gala scene. I'm not even joking about that. I'm not sure which of us said it, but it happened.

Is it obvious I watched the entirety of Criminal Minds while I write this story? Yeah? Cool.

One of the major things that came out of this story was that I wanted it to be kinda fucked up. I wrote literally torture. I spent way too much time on looking up injuries, burns, how injuries heal, physiological affects, etc. I don't half ass things when it comes to writing. I joked that my FBI agent was concerned. And like, I have To You out on my page and it is so vastly different in terms of how I've written. To You was sweet and fluffy while BSH was just pain, suffering, torment, anguish.

I made Mouse one of the most unreliable characters I think I could every make. She makes reckless, stupid decisions. I wanted readers to get mad at her, but still love her for who she was. Mouse did things for a reason, and she never wanted to hurt those around her but hyper-independence doesn't help.

I've never been a fan of stories where everything is always alright. I want pizzazz to my stories, I want this deep view of certain things. It's how Mouse ended up in a coma, tortured, mentally unwell. It's how Mouse ends up killing Monsta X. It's how the leaders were blown up. I would honestly talk for a while about how certain things came to be in this story, but I've be rambling for way too long. There were many talks between Mel, Nic, and I about how things would go within the story, which spiraled from there. This story truly was a labor of love that I don't think I can fully beat because of the time and effect that went into it.

AND JUST SO WE ARE CLEAR, I LOVE MONSTA X, THEY WERE MY FIRST KPOP GROUP, SHOUT OUT TO 'BEAUTIFUL' FOR GETTING ME INTO THIS HELL. I JUST NEEDED A VILLAIN.

There were also some scenes that never made it in the main story that I might put as Extras, but I also have other Extras ideas. I know I do wanna write some back stories, especially Minghao's and Jun's. Or even early SVT days. There's a lot of thoughts in my brain haha.

Favorite parts

For myself, I'd have to say the scene where Mouse was in the coma. I wanted to have this...internal crisis where Mouse has two choices and she needed to pick one. But I also didn't want it to be so terribly painful because I've just submitted everyone to...all that torture lmao. Mouse sees her parents, but she also gets to pick something for herself, to go back to the family she found and loved.

Mel's: "Oh shit mmmmm im split between the box scene and the last monologue before she kills Kihyun and her shooting him multiple times, both are great scenes. The box scene is also great because its her justifiable breakdown after so much torture and I like how that ends with her accepting her fate and finding comfort in hallucinating the guys cause it shows how much she has gained them as a family. The monologue and the shooting is great writing and also I love that it shows her development and self realization in the monologue followed by how she is strong but still human because she refuses to stop shooting until shes out of bullets and knows he is dead."

Nic's: "i like when mouse confronts that one asshole in ruby and very blatantly threatens him (as she should)"

Sammi had rushed upstairs in a tizzy as he and Star were discussing how to handle and organize the income of people soon, stock cards and rubber bands for figuring out what was done, the severity of each case, and more. His head was aching already. 

“She-” Sammi ran into the doorways of the operation room, cursing louder before skidding to a stop. “Downstairs, she’s awake.” 

Everyone in the room froze, Siyeon trying to get out of bed and Jongho stopped her with an argument that they needed to see her before anyone else could. The woman looked ready to wring his neck but he pushed her back into bed (gently), begrudgingly accepting his comment that they don’t know her full mental state yet. 

Sammi was asked to watch the rest with another nurse for the time being. Jongho took the stairs two at a time with Star ahead of him, hurrying down the darker hallways to Minji’s room. She was still laying down, but finally her eyes were open and she was holding onto the side bars of the hospital bed so tight it turned her knuckles white. She jerked away from the door when they came in, eyes wide, confused, her heart rate increased and so did her breathing. 

“Where am I?” She sounded rough, throat dry and scratchy from disuse. “Where’s-”

Jongho moved forward first, slowly, hands up. “It’s okay, Minji. Take a minute. You’ve been out for a few days.” 

Her eyebrows twitched together, even more confused, but her hands loosened on the rails. “Days?” 

“Yeah, days,” Star confirmed, standing a step behind Jongho. “Do you remember who we are?” 

She nodded her head but winced, letting her arms slip onto the bed at her sides. “Yes.” 

“What’s the last thing you remember?” 

Minji breathed deeply out of her nose, “We – Siyeon and I – went to some warehouse and saw the rest of the leaders…we went in and everything gets fuzzy from there.”  

Slowly, Jongho lowered the side rail closest to him so Star could look over her a bit. “There was an explosion when you guys went inside. A bad one. Everyone is okay, varying injuries, but alive. Been worried about you. You’ve been conscious for nearly four days.”

Finally, her eyebrows pulled together in a frown, before her eyes widened. “Did Mouse come to see me?” 

“Uh-” Jongho nodded. “How do you know?” 

“She, ow-” Star apologized as she was gently lifting Minji’s arm, gloves on now, to look over the burns on her forearm. “I heard her, she is going to confront Kihyun herself. Where is she? Where is everyone?” 

She tried to sit up, but the harrowing shout of pain she let out was enough to have her laying back, eyes on the ceiling. Her heart was still fast, breathing erratic. Star was sending Jongho an incredulous look that spoke more words than needed since he didn’t seem surprised at the information. He took a logical guess the day she did come to see Minji, he just hoped she was okay. No one had heard from anyone in a long while.

Minji’s eyes fell on Jongho’s face and the whisper she left out was heartbreaking. “You know, didn’t you? I heard you, telling her to call you. You let her-” 

“If you think I could have stopped her once she was already on the train, you are wrong.” He helped the doctor now, slipping gloves on to see everything they could for the burn wounds. Minji was cooperating but the pain was bad enough that they gave her more pain killers as they moved her about, sitting her up slowly to check her back. “She would have done it either way, she’d do it even if everyone told her to stop. She is a force no one can stop unless you kill her. I guessed she was going to do something, but that’s all I have, a guess and a hope she is going to call me, alive.” 

“Before you ask again, the leaders are upstairs. Resting but anxious. Tonight is the fight. We are waiting for people to come in in the aftermath of it all.” Star, though her tone was solid, her jaw was clenched. She was looking over the burns on Minji’s back and side, the worst of it, but even Jongho was surprised that it was looking alright. Small graces. “I’m going to get one of the nurses out there to come help change the dressings and we can probably get her cleaned up. I don’t see any signs of infection or necrosis. I wouldn’t be opposed to bringing her upstairs. Just need to check her head too.” 

“Minji, you can’t tell anyone upstairs about Mouse.” Jongho held her up softly, standing before her as the other called another nurse and started to change the dressings. “Not yet. I can’t have any of them losing it right now.” 

Minji held Jongho's forearms, steady pressure in her grip, flinching towards him, away from the pain on her back and side. “Fine, fine, but it’s deplorable that you even slightly condoned this…” 

“I know, trust me I know. I’m sorry you have to hold this secret.” 

She leaned forward, fatigue already setting in, and rested her head on his forearm, a shaky breath leaving her. “She said the fight was tonight?” 

Jongho didn’t move away, being the wall of comfort she needed. “It’s already going on, it’s late, it’s been maybe an hour? We haven’t heard anything from anyone.” 

She went quiet as Star and the nurse placed fresh gauze and ointment on the worst burns to her side, hands tightening on his arms. “Whatever tube is down my throat, I need it out safely before I pull it out violently.” 

“We can do that, we are almost done with this.” Star hummed, her ministrations thorough but easy, trying to avoid as much pain as possible. “How does your head feel?” 

“Hurts but it isn’t egregious. I guess the pain meds helped.” 

“How does your vision seem? Blurry? Tunnel vision?” 

Minji raised her head and narrowed her eyes at Jongho, studying his face like it was some sort of assignment. “Blurry, no, tunneling, no, but my eyes hurt.” 

“Probbaly straining from some disuse, not abnormal. You have a cracked skull.” 

“Anything else fucked about me?” 

“Not really, just burns and the head fracture.” Jongho still held her up but slowly started to remove the electrodes from her forehead then got the head piece off, tossing it aside on the bed for now. “You’ll need to be resting for a while before you can get back to normal.” 

When the burn care was done, Star helped Jongho get Minji back into bed, tucking her in comfortably. While Jongho focused on cleaning up and making sure everything was ready to move her, Star more focused on the medical side of it all, asking the right questions, making sure nothing was wrong with her beyond what they could see. He asked the nurse to make room for Minji’s bed upstairs and inform everyone she was okay, but a rock was resting heavily in his stomach. 

How was everything at the warehouse? With Mouse? Who was alive? Who was knocking on death's door? What could they expect? Who will make it in the next coming days?

The short elevator ride was quiet when Minji was given the okay to be moved. He watched her stare at the chrome ceiling, huffing to herself that she couldn’t believe so much happened while she was knocked down. He had to agree with her there, a lot happened and the stuff she knew was only the tip of the iceberg. He had to warn everyone to not overwhelm her with everything at once. 

“You guys look like hell.” Minji frowned the moment she was rolled in, but a smile was evident on her face. “I’m glad you are all okay.” 

“Speak for yourself, you were dead to the world for a while.” Chris threw out the comment and she grimaced. “Glad you are awake and seeming yourself.” 

“Surprisingly.” Jongho got her into her space, locking the wheels of the bed. “Before you all dive into explaining everything to her, don’t go overboard. She still has a head injury.” 

“And a headache.” She added, cringing when she asked him to help lift the head of the bed so she wasn’t laying fully flat. “And a lot of pain.” 

“Welcome to the drugged up club.” Siyeon looked ready to cry but was grinning ear to ear. She got up from her bed, disregarding the IV (which Sammi had to rush to help her unhook before she pulled it out, he learned), and shuffled over.

“The hell happened to your arm?” Minji reached out to touch the thick cast that covered Siyeon’s left arm. Conversation moved on from there, and it was welcoming from the tension from earlier.

Jongho found his favorite rolly chair in the clinic, Seonghwa’s desk chair, and sank into it, letting the leaders talk and talk. Seonghwa was more there mentally after some days to heal with the concussion, and everyone was in better spirits even as they waited. A positive through the darkness now that Minji was awake, a blessing. He managed to throw a few comments in there, but he was more comfortable listening then interacting at the moment, understandably. 

Time continued to tick by heavily for him. Star and the team she had brought in were sitting with them, some pacing while others took the moments of reprieve while they could. They were told the major details, and no one asked questions, just nodded and were told they’d be compensated well, no matter the outcome. The leaders had grown comfortable talking more freely, seeing as a majority of these people helped save them. 

“Hello, earth to Jongho?” Hongjoong called out, snapping his attention back, eyes wide. 

“What?” 

Hongjoong frowned, head tilted to the side. “I asked if you were okay. You haven’t been listening.” 

Jongho slowly tilted his head to the side, lips parted to answer but nothing really came out at first. “Oh, yeah, thinking of what to expect, sorry. We have a lot prepared but anything could happen.” 

The leaders stared at him, and he cleared his throat, sitting a little straighter in his spot. Seonghwa went to say something but his phone started to ring, saving him from further scrutiny. He dug the device from his pocket, eyes meeting an unknown number but fear that shot through his mind had him answering quickly. 

“Hello?” He stood, eyes trying to find anything to focus on on the floor. He heard breathing, labored. 

“Jongho?” His body went rigid even if relief went through him at Mouse’s voice. “I n-need help. Hurt.” 

“Where are you? Send me your location and I can come.” 

“Who is it?” Hongjoong asked but Jongho ignored him. “Jongho, who is it?” 

“Don’t…know.” There was a sound of rustling before a thud and no further response. 

“Mouse? Mouse, where are you? Hello?” He pulled the phone away to make sure it was still going before rushing to grab his laptop, coming to Siyeon’s side at Minji’s bed. “Siyeon, how do I track a phone?!” 

“Give.” She took the device with one hand and Minji moved her leg to make room. She struggled to type with one hand as everyone was asking questions that he didn’t have time to answer. “Give me the number. Is the call still going?” 

She took the phone from his hand, long enough to get the number then handed it back.

“What’s going on?!” Jeonghan was trying to get up but Sammi kept him in bed. “Jongho, come on!” 

“I can’t explain right now, stop!” He kept trying to talk into the phone, still hearing her breath even if it was raspy and shallow. 

“Got it, it isn’t far, maybe five miles.” She typed something and a message was sent to his phone. “Go find her.” 

Everyone was yelling, and Minji was the one that had to explain, which caused even more questions. 

Jongho stopped Star just for a moment, both sharing a look. “Prep an OR just in case.” 

He was out the door alone, barely buckling up as he went scorched earth out of the parking lot, GPS leading him down the roads. His heart was in his throat, hands tight on the wheel to stop himself from shaking. The call went on, keeping him focused on each breath she took. 

The lot was empty except for one car when he arrived, skidding to a stop just before he collided with it. Jongho rushed from his car, knocking on the window when the door didn’t open. 

“Mouse! Mouse, wake up, damn it!” He pounded harder on the window but she didn’t show any signs of rousing, only a twitch. 

He didn’t have anything in his car to break the window. Quickly searching the ground for anything that could help him. He didn’t even have a gun on him for fucks sake. 

Jongho was ready to start punching the window when he spotted a decent sized, pointy enough rock, and aimed for the back driver’s side window, not wanting to hit her. It took a few hard throws to get it to even crack and another throw with his full strength for it to shatter. Getting inside to unlock all the doors took a moment since the car wasn’t that big, but he saw enough of her blood that coated the seat to know it wasn’t good. 

She nearly fell out of the front seat when he opened the door, having been leaning on it with no seat belt, and she was freezing to the touch, pale. Her shoulder looked dislocated just based on the deformity under her shirt and he had to be careful to move her. There were other injuries, but a lot of blood, things he couldn’t see through the red stains and clothing. She didn’t respond to any pain when he did start to get her from the car, trying to lay her in his backseat, but opted to get her in the front, easy to get her out when they got back. 

He did send a message to two of the guards that they needed to come and move the car, specifying it was covered in blood so they needed to be careful with the location. He was a rushed talk-to-text message with too many mistakes he couldn’t care less about as he whipped from the parking lot, calling Star. 

“How bad is it?” 

“Probably a gunshot, definitely a dislocated shoulder, probably some other things too. Her breathing is getting shallower and she isn’t responding to any pain.” He tried to shake her as he drove, safely blowing through a red light. “She probably lost a lot of blood.” 

“We have blood on standby, your two guys just left to get the car. There is a mutiny going on. Minji explained but they are still pissed.” 

“I’m almost outside.” 

“Bring her straight down.” 

Jongho barely put the car in park before he was jumping out, rushing to the passenger side to scoop her out. Another guard was helping get the door open, running through the hall, passing the observation room where the shouting started again. He was easier on the stairs, scared to drop or bump her against the walls. Star, Rob, and two nurses were waiting, mostly gowned up as he pushed the door open with his shoulder and deposited her onto the table. His arms were covered in her blood and one nurse got him out, leaving him to stare through the glass as they started to cut clothes, threw the vest to the floor, and grabbed tools. For her own privacy, he turned quickly, averting his eyes as they stripped her. 

He needed a new shirt and to clean off Mouse’s blood, but he hesitated, mentally preparing for the onslaught of questions he would get the moment he was upstairs. He really didn’t want to deal with it, but he owed it to them at least. 

For the time being, he got a shirt from the scrubs rack they had, moving to the bathroom to start the scrubbing of his hands and arms, letting the red wash away with some of his worry since she was still breathing, still alive. That’s what mattered. 

When he made it to the observation room, angry, worried eyes speared him. 

“You have two minutes to explain, or I’m kicking your ass, broken leg or not.” Jeonghan said slowly, voice low and tight, and Jongho sighed, sitting down for the long conversation ahead.

Moments after a fight are never truly quiet. Whether it be racing thoughts or the harsh breathing, it was never quiet. 

But it was over, or it felt like it was, and Chan needed to remind himself that as he stepped over fallen bodies, making sure those who were on the opposite side were down and truly dead. Though the space was large and airy, it smelled like rust and copper. He tried not to look at anyone’s faces, keeping his gaze from drifting there in habit. More surprising was the fact that his hands weren’t shaking for once, calm and controlled, even if his heart still beat rapidly in his chest. 

“Call the clinic,” He heard Jihoon call out to someone, “Tell them all we know and we’ll transport the critical ones there first. Anyone that can walk or has surface injuries will get more treatment here than can be finished out there.” 

“I found the keys to one of their trucks!” Another called out – Seungkwan – jogging over to him. “We can use it to transport some of the lower priority people too.”

His eyes lifted from the bodies, finding Jihoon across the way, just outside the vault as people were starting to be carried out; Gahyeon, Sona, Wonwoo, Mingyu, Hyunjin and more. He couldn’t think. Maybe the smell and adrenaline crash was getting to him. Maybe the room was starting to spin from the waning adrenaline. He shook his head to collect his thoughts, 

“Chan, go with them.” Vernon came into his line of sighting, jerking a thumb towards where the injured were taken. “Quick, before they take off.” 

“But-” 

“What are you still doing here? Go with them.” Seungkwan jogged over, a frown on his brows. His hands and arms were mostly clean, but Chan could still see the missed blood there. Red turning brown.

“I can-” 

“Chan, head out with them,” Jihoon ordered, calling out from where he stood with Bora and Yunho, trying to talk things over. “Make sure they get there.” 

Minghao wandered out from the vault, shoulder bandaged, but looking a bit better. Maybe a bit of blood given based on the bandage in the crook of his elbow. He stepped over a few of the bodies without much thought, watching where he was going, before bumping his good arm into Chan. 

“Come.” 

With no room to argue, Chan helped Minghao into the van, most of the seats gone to accommodate just laying everyone down. Sona, Hyunjin, Gahyeon, and Wonwoo were laying down while. Mingyu, San, and Minghao rested against one of the side walls, and Chan slid into the passenger seat with one of their men as the driver. Everyone was mostly stable, but definitely needed a hand when they made it to the clinic.

“Keep it slow and steady.” Lex was holding Sona’s head still, and Mingyu snickered with San. The two were grinning like idiots even if they were hurt. They’d be feeling it later. 

“Yeah, gotta keep the girlfriend alive.” 

“Make another joke and I’ll put another bullet in you.” Lex glared but Mingyu’s grin only grew wider, putting his uninjured hand up in surrender. 

“Took you both long enough.” Minghao rolled his eyes, leaning his head back against the side of the van. “Was sick of all the heart eyes with no action, I’d rather read a slow burn than whatever you both had.” 

“Were we that obvious?” Sona was quiet but it was loud enough as the van started to move. Her upper body tensed, and Lex held steady.

“Mouse could complain about it.” San hummed, injured shoulder twitching and he hissed in pain. “She’d complain a lot then come up with these master plans to get you both together, which was going to be after all of this, but I guess fate had other plans.” 

“God I hope she is okay.” Sona let out, sighing out heavily, slowly lifting a hand to rub at her face, 

“Where is she?” Minghao’s tone had more accusation in it than anything and Chan turned around in his seat to watch the rest of them. “I know you’ve been helping her.” 

For a moment, Chan thought Sona wasn’t going to answer, that she would stay silent for her own good since Minghao wasn’t always the nicest when it came to the core group. Chan opened his mouth to calm them, to put it off, but Sona sighed again, heavy and guilty. 

“She went to Ruby. She said she needed to fight Kihyun one on one.”

“I’m gonna kill her myself.” Wonwoo grumbled, laying as still as he could, more awake, but still in pain from the two knives still in his side, now more stabilized with bundles of gauze and a fuck ton of tape. 

“Get in line.” 

“Chan, call ahead,” Minghao’s eyes were now on him, narrowed and sharp. “Ask if they’ve heard from her.” 

Sheepishly, Chan nodded, trying to find his phone in the pockets of his jacket. He dialed Cheol first, letting the line ring and ring before his voice came through. 

“Chan? Where are you guys?” 

“Oh- uh,” He  cleared his throat, glancing out the front window. “Maybe twenty or less. We have-” 

“Jihoon said you had some criticals with you, they are prepped here for them.” There was a tight edge to his tone and his mind jumped to the worst. 

“Yeah, we do, mostly stable, but will need some decent work ups.” Chan glanced back at everyone sitting or laying on the van floor, a heavy weight in his stomach. “Is Mouse-” 

He groaned, angry and stressed, a caged animal since he couldn’t do anything with his busted ACL. “Here, and alive, but she is hurt. When you get here she might still be in surgery.” 

“They have her.” Chan called back and relief passed through some faces, but none looked truly happy. “How bad?” 

“Unconscious on arrival, we didn’t see her but Jongho said it looked like blood loss and decent injuries. They took her right downstairs.” His voice lightened enough for Chan’s chest to take in a full breath, relieved, and he sat back, letting his head hang. “Get here safe, we can talk more later.”

He didn’t like the sound of that, but didn’t worry himself too much over it. He couldn’t worry himself about it or he wouldn’t be sleeping more than he already wasn’t going to. 

“Chan, you good?” Mingyu called out and he gave a short few nods, phone clenched in his hand. 

“Yeah, tired, I definitely need a drink. A stiff one.” 

“Once I can drink, I am.” Hyunjin spoke softly, tired, conscious but could fall asleep at any moment. “Don’t care what the doctor says.” 

“It’s deserved.” 

The rest of the drive to the clinic wasn’t conversation filled, mostly saving whatever energy was left. Chan’s body felt sluggish, sapped of all remaining stamina, and everything ached. Sore and tense. He’d be feeling it all for days on end. He was lucky to come out unscathed, much to the cost of others who were hurt in the line of battle. 

Two nurses, Jongho, and a few crew members in scrubs were waiting outside of the clinic when they pulled to a stop, beds and wheelchairs just beyond the entrance. They worked carefully and cautiously to get Sona and Gahyeon from the back, keeping the jostling to a minimum. Chan offered help but he was waved off to get the ones that could stand out. Wonwoo and Hyunjin were out next as another van pulled up, men and women of different groups in different states piled in. 

Jongho and one of the nurses were calling out orders, tagging and moving to the next based on the status of their injuries, who could wait, who needed help critically, and those who could deal with some old fashioned combat treatment until a doctor could see them. Chan got Minghao, Mingyu, and San inside, having to push the first man in a wheelchair since he was dizzy. They were deemed ‘pink’, injured enough to get looked at first, but they’ll live with some preventative stuff until further notice. They could still feel and move their injured limbs so he was told to periodically test it.

“Finally you made it.” Cheol, while hurt, was in a wheelchair when they came through the door, depositing San and Mingyu into chairs for the time beginning while he places Minghao beside an anxious looking Jeonghan. His lips were picked raw. “This place is going to be a mad house sooner or later.” 

“It will be.” Chan ran hand through his hair, groaning quietly at the tension in his shoulder. “Everyone is a little dinged up, but alive, that’s all I’m happy abo-” 

Seungcheol’s phone rang loud and annoying, the sound enough to make Chan realize he had a headache and should nurse it with meds before it got any worse. Cheol didn’t even bother to keep it private, hitting the speaker phone button. 

“Hello?” 

“Mouse burned Ruby to the ground.” Jihoon’s voice came through loud and clear, but he didn’t sound too angry, more surprised. “I just got the call from the fire department, it’s gone.” 

“She did fucking what?” Jeonghan yelled out, sitting up quickly. “That fuck do you mean she burned it down?” 

“Our guy in the police called, said the whole place is up in flames.” 

“You have got to be kidding me.” Cheol looked like he aged ten years and aged even more when someone cleared their throat at the open door to the observation room. 

“Don’t worry yourself with that, buildings have been bought.” Rheia was dressed down for once, sweats and a shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. “She thought ahead. Let’s worry about getting everyone cared for.” 

“Of course she did, stupid and smart, an idiot in distress, not a damsel.” Jihoon wasn’t wrong, she’d probably agree with him later on the statement. “Let me go, I’ll need to head to Ruby at some point but the fire is still going on.” 

The call finished and Rheia made her way over to Mingyu, finding gloves to look at the slash in his arm. Mingyu cracked a stupid joke about if she had some secret doctoral degree which she only smirked at and started to gather things to handle the numbing process of his arm from what she said. 

“I’m gonna be honest,” Hongjoong was trying to hide a smirk, same with Chris. “I gotta give it to Mouse. She has some big fucking balls.” 

“Please do not tell her that, her ego is already fucking huge.” Joshua groaned, huffing as he tried to sit more comfortably. It was not working even when Chan went over to help. “Big enough head.” 

“Way too big.” Minghao added, slouching in the wheelchair. “Any updates on her?” 

“Not since they took her down. Jongho told us everything he knew about her plans, and Minji filled in the rest.” Seonghwa motioned to the, now awake, woman, she simply waved, but luckily she looked okay given the situation. “Mouse apparently said some shit while Minji was out and she was able to hear it.” 

“Where can I get some pain meds around here?” Minghao said what Chan was thinking and Seonghwa motioned to an unlocked cabinet. 

“Thank god.” Chan moved for the both of them, being told by both Seonghwa and Rheia what medicine to grab so no one ODed. He struggled to find them at first but got enough for himself, Minghao, Mingyu, and San, nothing overly strong but enough to get any heavy edge off. 

Jongho stepped into the room, another set of scrubs on, a tired look in his gaze, and he was already going towards San and Mingho to start work on their injuries. 

“They just finished up on Mouse. Everything went well.” All heads whipped towards him and he didn’t stray from his task. “She should be rolled up here into a bed soon.”

Everything felt heavy, yet nothing hurt at the moment. Things were attached to you, you could feel the wires and hear the beeping. There was a lot of talking, normal volume, idle conversations all around you, calm, a little inviting. Your throat was dry as hell and you wanted to sleep more, catch up on more rest before reality came rushing back. You weren’t in some floating void, you were just conscious of your closed eyelids and the muted light that was above you. 

“Almost all of the seriously injured ones are stable, in beds, and resting. Only two more are downstairs getting finished off.” You recognized Star’s voice first, fatigued but present, a small laugh leaving her. “We have a lot of hands helping so I’m giving my hands a break. They are cramping.” 

“You’ve been in back to back surgeries, I’m not surprised.” Jihoon was there next, close but not right at your bed side if you had to guess. “Thanks for all the help.” 

“Ah, the least I could do. You’ve nearly helped me pay off my student loans.” Another laugh, lighter. 

“Mouse still not awake?” Cheol’s voice came closer.

“Nah, with how much blood she lost and the fact she was down when she came in, she might be out a little while longer. She took a rough beating.” Star hummed. “Tough cookie you got.” 

“Don’t remind me, I feel like I need to wrap her in bubble wrap.”

Jihoon scoffed. “She’d go insane if she wasn’t doing something stupid.” 

“I don’t care if she did stupid shit, I’m used to all of you guys,” Cheol countered, and you felt a hand move some hair away from your face. “I’d just like it if she told us the stupid shit so she didn’t pull a disappearing act again and get all hurt without any help.” 

“That will never happen.” Rheia was on your other side now, maybe sitting from the stopping of foot steps. “I know too many of her type. She’ll be reckless until the day she dies.” 

“Hopefully later rather than sooner.” 

You allowed your eyes to flutter open, enough of hearing them talk about you when you could be a part of the conversation. The light wasn’t too bright but you winced enough to get their attention it seemed. The curtains around your bed were pulled closed.

“I plan to live a long time despite everything.” Your voice was hoarse, it hurt, but you could talk and that was what mattered. 

Cheol came into view first, leaning over the bed the best he could, a bright smile on his face, and he ran a finger gently over your cheek. “Hey, gorgeous. Welcome back.” 

“Good to be here.” You swallowed thickly but it didn’t help the pain. Jihoon was already there with a cup of water. You tried to reach out for it but a shock of pain went through you from the minimal movement and a hiss was all that came out to compensate for it. You saw stars, dizzy from the burning, aching sensation. 

“Yeah, you deserve that.” Jihoon didn’t hide his smirk when he learned forward, holding the straw out for you to drink from. “Don’t try that again, you are fucked over three ways from Sunday.”

“I can feel it.” You drank down the whole cup, relaxing back. “How bad?” 

“Where do we start?” Star came into view, arms crossed and a deep scowl on her face. “Your shoulder was completely dislocated, you’ll be in a sling for about six weeks with how bad it was. You had a deep wound for your other arm, stitches and some internal repair. Removed a bullet from your thigh, real deep in there-” 

“There is more too, but I think that’s enough for now.” Cheol chided the doctor and she rolled her eyes, muttering something about checking on the others before walking off. “But, she isn’t wrong, you are gonna be laid up for a while.” 

“We have to give Jeonghan a sedative to calm down because of you. He was throwing a fit when they brought you back up here.” Jihoon didn’t sound amused but did help you sit up, raising the back of the bed. “And you have a lot of explaining to do.”

“I do.” You groaned in pain, sinking into the bed. “Just…not yet.”

“Was Ruby at least cleaned out?” He sat on the edge of your bed and you couldn’t hide the smirk. “Don’t fucking smirk at that.” 

“Of course it was, I’m stupid but not an idiot. I’m sorry for burning her down. Sona helped me. Where is she, anyways? How is everyone?” 

Rheia reached out and placed a hand on yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. Your eyebrows twitched together in confusion, finding the sullen faces of Seungcheol, Jihoon, Star and Rheia. Something inside you sank. 

“What? What happened?” You tried to push yourself up and you doubled over at the pain that radiated through you, cursing out under your breath. 

“Sona…is in surgery.” Seungcheol started, not much he can do in terms of helping Jihoon and Star settling you back against the pillow. “She got shot in the spine.” 

“How long?” You raised your eyes to the ceiling, taking short breaths to ease your racing heart, panic in your bones. “How bad is it?”

“We are going on hour three, but last I checked, she was doing well and they were finishing up.” Star cleared her throat, “Sudden onset paralysis of the lower extremities, we are hoping that once the nerves get she recovers, she’ll be able to walk again.” 

Your body felt cold, stunned and shocked from the information, guilt bleeding into the worry. Suddenly your pain was minor, negligible, and you felt confined. They must have seen the look on your face because Jihoon started to move with Rheia. Your boyfriend rolled himself back, making room as Jihoon started to unhook you from different monitors, telling you the IV stays in, much to the itch that coursed through your body. Rheia came through the curtain with a wheelchair, and you were finally starting to register the talking of others outside of the bubble you were in. 

“How’s everyone else?” You didn’t struggle as you were helped into the chair, a blanket thrown over your legs. 

“Hurt but alive.” Seungcheol sighed, running a hand through his hair, Jihoon standing behind his chair. “We lost less than expected, thankfully. Everyone lost less than expected. All of you planned well. It’s over.” 

You had to stop yourself from commenting that it wasn’t enough. Keeping your injured arm close, Rheia started to push you out of the curtained off area. 

“Oh, Wonwoo is pissed at you by the way.” Jihoon hummed, behind you with Cheol, the rest of the overly crowded observation room coming into view. 

Some of the beds, like your own, were curtained off, but chairs and cots lined the area like the makeshift combat hospital, which it mostly was. Rheia stopped pushing you, letting you take in the injured as they had previously, finding faces you knew all too well in the crowd. 

Jongho, Seungkwan, and Vernon were flitting around the room with an unknown face, hands full of different supplies between medical things and food or drinks, passing them out to their respective recipients. Mingyu was sitting in a chair rather than a bed, arm wrapped up tightly. Beside him San’s shoulder was wrapped up, sling holding his arm in place, but they were smiling, chatting as if nothing was wrong. Seonghwa was up, shuffling around to help the best he could with one working arm and eye. Jongho did help him not run straight into a chair that he didn’t see. Jeonghan was asleep in a bed, and you didn’t see Joshua yet. Hongjoong was chilling in a chair next to Siyeon and Minji- 

“You look like a sight for sore eyes.” You head whipped to Minghao and Jun, sitting not far from where you left the separated bed, and you sighed with a smile, a small piece of relief flooding your mind. Jun grinned before continuing. “You have a lot of answers you need to give us later, Mouse.” 

“Don’t remind me.” Rheia pushed you over to them and Minghao placed a hand on her knee, giving it a squeeze. 

“Glad to see you are still around.” 

“Is it all really over?” You knew Seungcheol wasn’t lying when he said it was over, but Minghao was never one to lie to you. Always forthcoming. He and Jun shared a look but nodded your way. “Thank god.” 

“It is, and now we can finally breathe.” Jun winked, still grinning, the smile you loved so much. “Let’s focus on healing, yeah?” 

“Yeah.” You cleared your throat, nodding. Your head still hurt but it wasn’t as harsh with the pain meds you were probably given. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” 

“Eh,” Jun shrugged, motioning to Minghao. “We had it handled, though, you have to explain yourself to Wonwoo. He and some others might kill you.” 

Minghao gave a small nod, sharp eyes but he didn’t look mad. “But, never do that again.” 

You felt heaviness in your heart, breathing out slowly. “I shouldn’t unless we have problems with others in the future.” 

Based on how their faces shifted, they didn’t really like that answer but you managed a laugh. You let them be, letting Rheia move you further from them, trying to make a head count of the rest of your boys. Chan came barreling in with snacks in hand, nearly dropping them all on the floor when he spotted you, eyes wide in disbelief. 

“You’re awake.” His words were shaky and he was rooted in place, relief in his eyes. 

With a confirming nod, he quickly handed out the snacks and hurried over, giving you the gentlest, warmest hug he could with your injuries. It was a little awkward, but you didn’t care, you needed it given everything that has happened. 

“I’m glad you are okay.” His voice was tense, sorrowful, and when he pulled back, he was trying not to tear up. You took his hand, grounding him even as you were trying to ground yourself. 

“I’m glad to be okay. We can talk more later, get back to work.” He looked a little reluctant but did as you said, hurrying out of the room as fast as he came in. 

“Where’s Joshua?” Turning back, Rheia hummed in thought. “Everyone else?” 

“Joshua might be in the other room writing stuff down in charts now. He offered since he was losing his mind here. Wonwoo is asleep somewhere in this mess, he needed some work done after he was hurt. Those that weren’t injured are either at the warehouse identifying bodies and notifying people, or getting more supplies, food, stuff like that.” 

Rheia wheeled you over to Hongjoong, Siyeon, Minji, and now Chris, telling you to take a moment before overwhelming yourself even more. She was going to get you something to eat and drink since you needed the energy to heal. The four were glad to see you, but Minji did chew you out bad in that disappointed mom way that you did not miss before being orphaned. Changbin sauntered in, covered in bandages and bruises but walking without an issue, beaming as he could now say everyone was accounted for with you awake. It lightened something in your chest.

They filled you in on what happened, what injured those you couldn’t find had, where others were, and more. A lot more happened than you expected while unconscious from your injuries and surgery. You’d mourn the men and women you lost when they were all identified, wanting to make sure they got proper send offs based on what families wanted, out of obligation. It was the least they deserved and you’d do everything in your power to make sure the families were taken care of, as you spoke with Mingyu about previously. 

“Man, despite everything, I’m just glad I can go home to my own bed.” Chris spoke casually, breaking any tension that rested on your shoulders. “Hopefully everyone can sleep after this.” 

“I feel like I need a ten year nap.” Minji groaned, shifting in her seat. “The coma doesn’t make you feel rested.” 

“Tell me about it. I was more tired coming out of it than anything.” You laughed at the glare Siyeon sent your way, “Did you also have some internal existential crisis while in there?” 

Minji’s eyebrows came together as she shook her head. “No, I felt like I was floating in water.” 

“Damn, I had a whole existential crisis of living or dying. Don’t recommend." 

“I’d like to blame that on you just being weird.” Hongjoong scoffed, but it didn’t stop the twitch on the corner of his lips. “But your heart did stop.” 

“Guess you could say it was a once in a lifetime experience.” 

Chris booed you, the others snickering. “That was fucking horrible.”

“Never tried to make it good.” 

Rheia came back with a brighter looking Chan with actual food and drinks for the group of you, which you did end up struggling with because of your useless one arm, but you made it work. Seungcheol rolled up beside you as Changbin went off to do more business in his words, helping you when he could since he had two mostly working arms. Star had come back with Sammi, letting you know Sona was out of surgery but would be staying downstairs for the time being. Lex was with her, and Jihoon, who pulled a chair up, explained the wonderful change of events that you missed. You were pissed about missing it, going on that you were gonna plot with him, and he laughed despite how tired he looked. You didn’t even know what time it was, but it was late as hell. 

“Those with minor injuries are finally leaving to go home.” You heard Jongho not far off, talking to Seonghwa and you could see he was avoiding you. He’d look your way and look away the moment you watched him. “Once they leave, we can make room to spread out so no one is on top of each other anymore.” 

“We can do two to a room for the clinic rooms, whoever wants to share.” Seonghwa sounded exhausted, letting Jongho get him into a chair. “But knowing half of these people, the main groups will probably pile in here so we can clear other rooms.” 

“On it.” 

Seonghwa did end up looking your way then looked at Jongho. “Go talk to her.” 

“What-” 

“You’ve been worried sick and now you want to avoid her?” 

“Dude-” 

“Go.” 

“Jongho, come here!” Hongjoong grinned, knowing exactly what he was doing, and the youngest groaned, walking over to your small group. “I think Mouse needs some air, right?” 

“Huh?” You looked at him and Seungcheol was stifling a laugh at your side. 

“Definitely needs some air.” Cheol added between his giggles. “Little stuffy in here.” 

“Guys…” 

“The fresh air would be good for her.” Jihoon couldn’t stop himself from commenting, a smirk on his face. 

Jongho was already moving to stand behind your wheelchair, pushing you out of the room, towards the back exit. He didn’t say anything as someone helped him with the door and the chilly, night air hit your skin. Though it wasn’t ideal, the cold air did feel nice and you breathed a little deeper at the crispness of it. He helped fix your blanket when you struggled to cover your legs better and stood a few feet from you, hands slid in the scrub pockets. 

“How do you feel?” 

“Alive.” You grin with a tilt of your head, seeing that first layer he had up crack. “I remember calling you, but nothing else after that. Thank you for coming.” 

“Well,” He rolled his shoulders back, trying to loosen the strain there, “You called, so I came. I told you to call.”

“You saved me from bleeding out in Sona’s car.” 

He shifted uncomfortably at the idea of you bleeding out, casting his eyes towards the ground. “Star and the rest saved you. Took care of you.” 

Always the deflector of his efforts. “Jongho, you got there first, you answered, you got me here. You saved me first, like a good little brother.” 

His shoulders dropped and he knelt down, hands hiding his face for a moment. “God, shut up, you are embarrassing and I’m fucking all over the place. First you then having to help with everyone else, I’m trying to keep it together.” 

“Just admit you are a big teddy bear with emotions and we can get over your emotional constipation.” 

He lifted his head, scowling the best he could but you saw the fresh tears there, the worry he’d be holding and hiding until now, when everyone was okay. He swallowed down the emotions for a moment before he wiped his eyes quickly. 

“Everyone made it.” He whispered, elbows now resting on his legs, hands clasped tightly in front of him. “And they are gone.” 

“They are. We’ll be okay.” You held your good hand out to him and he rose up and walked over, taking your hand shakily. “We’ll heal, we’ll rebuild, and we’ll be okay.”

You found Joshua when Jongho wheeled you back inside, doing exactly as Rheia said he was, making notes on electronic charts from the notepads the nurses and doctors had given him as time went on. Sammi was in there with him, tying away on a second computer. She did help you back into the observation room since it was hard to do much with one arm, seeing those who weren’t too hurt have been released. Jeonghan had made it into a wheel chair, awake and mostly alert, and terribly happy to see you awake as well. Despite the strain, he did give you a kiss on the cheek, the bandaged one for ‘good healing’, which made you roll your eyes. He made sure he sat on your good side, holding your hand the entire time. Mingyu and San were happy to see you, going on and on about how badass they were earlier, a small jab of ‘you should have been there to see it!’. You didn’t blame them. Chairs and beds were being moved to make sure and you learned who was in each curtained off section, Woonwoo, Gahyeon, and Hyunjin each resting still. Yeonjun and Soobin came in not long after, sliding into seats both looking well, probably the best given the explosion they were in, Beomgyu and Taehyun came in behind them.

Jihoon came back into the room, phone in hand. “Everyone else will be on their way soon. Bodies have been identified and families have started to be called. Rheia offered to handle the moving of the deceased based on the familial wishes so I’ve handed the reins to her.” 

“We owe her big time.” Jeonghan hummed, fingers playing with yours out of habit. “For everything.” 

“She won’t accept any type of compensation.” Seonghwa stretched his legs out in front of him, groaning tiredly. 

“She would if Mouse said yes to taking over her stuff.” Mingyu snickered and the sigh you let out was heavy but comical, the group laughing. 

“Can I heal first before I even decide?” 

“Don’t think that is an option.” A new voice entered the room and Tessa leaned against the door frame. “Mother might throw a fit.” 

“The hell are you doing here?” 

Tessa shrugged, stepped further into the room, but didn’t sit, sliding her hands in her jacket pockets. “Here to offer my services for anyone that needs it. Mom also called me and wanted me to be here when Sona woke up too. Given the situation, she might be distressed and will need some professional help.” 

“Can therapy fix my sociopathic tendencies?” Beomgyu said, a mischievous grin on his face. 

Tessa leveled him with an unimpressed gaze. “Unless you willingly commit to change, that won’t change.” 

“What about her need to do everything alone and want to die but somehow live?” Minghao jabbed a thumb in your direction and you said his name like a curse. 

“That?” The woman shook her head. “That I can never fix, ever, she is like a cat, nine lives.”

“I’m sitting right here, you know.” 

“Yeah, fucked up in a wheelchair because you did something that could have gotten you killed.” Joshua shot back and you felt betrayed. “Truth hurts, sweetheart.” 

“The truth is ass and dramatic.” The glare you gazed at him with was weak and he had the audacity to send you a sassy little shake of his head. 

“Keep telling yourself that.” Mingyu leaned back in his seat, stretching one arm while trying to keep the other in place.

The remaining members of the groups arrived with little fanfare, collapsing into seats with tired greetings. Many had bruises and cuts, superficial and easy to heal. Others made comments of broken ribs and bullets that grazed their skin but stitches and bandages were enough. Everyone would have a scar or two when it was all healed, a remembrance of what happened, what you’ve overcome, and the lives lost for good or bad. 

You didn’t know if you’d ever fully recover from tonight, but you knew you’d at least be okay with life going forward. You’d still look over your shoulder, you’d still carry a gun, but you knew it was for other reasons than someone holding a murderous vendetta for actions you never caused, only slipped into accidentally. 

Though sleep was needed, no one could. Talking started, chairs and wheelchairs set up in a circle as stories floated through the air, laughter, lightness. A bubble of ordinary that you didn’t want anyone to break, no need for a reality check as everyone came to accept that each person was breathing, alive, in the room, even if they were hurt. Soonyoung and Seokmin were animated in describing a heist, but the dramatics were confusing the actual plot of the adventure enough to have Chan. It was a good loud, happy loud, and you leaned to your side, enjoying the moment peacefully.

With no windows in the room, someone did make a comment that it was early morning, having checked their phone for the time, but that never stopped the ebb and flow of the space. Star had come in to scold everyone for not sleeping, but she wasn’t any better cracking over an energy drink and sitting on an empty cot, listening rather than interacting. Hyunjin had woken up in the middle of the conversations, transferred into a chair despite protests. He didn’t care. Gahyeon was still in a lot of pain but present, watching and commenting but did fall asleep more, which was expected given the extent of her recovery going forward. 

“You guys are loud. Shut up.” Wonwoo’s gruff voice came from behind a curtain. “Can a guy suffer in silence?” 

“Why the hell would you want that?” Seungkwan was up first, throwing the curtain open, a hiss of disapproval leaving him as he shielded his eyes. “The gang’s all here.” 

“Can the gang shut up?” He reached around for his glasses and Seungkwan helped him, fixing his blankets. 

Jun placed his hands behind his head, eyes closed as he relaxed. “Why be quiet when we can live passionately and loudly?” 

“To be fair, I’ve had a headache for the last two hours of this makeshift campfire session. It’s loud in here.” Yunho laughed and Seonghwa went on a mico-rant that he knew where the meds were if he needed them.

“A little party never killed nobody.” Wooyoung looked proud of his comment but Mingi pointed to you. 

“Oi, don’t give her any more ideas.” 

“Can we all stop bullying me?” There wasn’t any conviction in your tone. 

“Girl, be so for real,” Yubin shook her head. “You’re never going to live this down, just accept that you’ll be bullied for doing your hyper-independence shit that can kill you until the day you actually die.” 

“A girl can have hope.” 

“Not a whole lot of it. Wonwoo was ready to go three rounds in the ring with you.” Seungkwan laughed, rolling Wonwoo in closer to the group. 

The aforementioned man was sat up slowly by Seungkwan through grimaces of pain, huffing out each breath. “I will, once we are both healed, I’m beating your ass.” 

You managed to turn in your chair to see him, shrugging. “I dunno, you’ve trained me a little too well. I did beat a psychopath that had a knife coming at me.” 

“That isn’t funny, Mo.” Jeonghan whined but you couldn’t stop the cheshire smile that spread on your face. 

“It’s a little funny.” Mingyu chimed in, seemingly proud that he helped train you. 

Jun put his hands up in defeat. “Hate to tell you guys this, we’ve trained a monster.”

“Seconding that.” Wonwoo rubbed his hands over his face then eyes, pushing his glasses up. 

“Can I continue on about that stupid hacker I found?” Yeosang raised his hand and Wooyoung started to laugh and laugh, and laugh until he was falling out of his chair, tears in his eyes. 

“Dude thought he was slick with that hacking too!”

“Maybe I will get those pain killers.” Yunho stood, glancing around the group. “Anyone else?” 

A new flood of voices joined in, calling for some for themselves, complaints and whines of needing it for the soreness that was setting in finally. 

“You alright?” Jeonghan leaned over, bumping his head gently with your own, a calm breath leaving him. 

You nodded, letting his weight comfort your mind. “I am, are you?” 

“Yeah, especially with everyone here. I’m content.” 

When sleep inevitably started to take over and contagious yawns rumbled through many, beds were starting to get claimed. Those who could, shared, squished together in cots. The two pull out couches were made and any comfortable chair was given blankets to hopefully get some sleep. The ones with more serious injuries were given priority of the cots, which led you to a bed between Wonwoo and Jeonghan, tucked into bed tightly by a very serious looking Seokmin. Heaviness rested behind his eyes, but the same, bright Seokmin was still there, gentle where it was needed. 

A murmuring hush blanketed the room, soft snoring, even breaths, peace. Not entirely defenseless, but less guarded, smaller, placid. No one needed to sleep in fear anymore of someone always knowing, watching, plotting. 

You stared up at the white ceiling, letting the quiet seep into your bones, your mind. Your eyes were heavy, but sleep eluded you per usual, tired but never enough to lull you enough most nights. You had things to say, to do, to apologize for – it would come later, when everyone was ready to listen, when the nonphysical scars started to heal enough to understand and accept. You still had things to do though, things that would hopefully let you sleep.

Slowly, you got yourself to sit up, stifling down any pained sounds at the ache that coursed within. It was arduous, sitting yourself on the edge, trying not to disturb anyone that desperately needed sleep. Jeonghan, the lightest sleeper you knew, thankfully didn’t stir, and you slid from the bed until your socked feet hit the cold floor. Pain shot up through your thigh, nearly toppling you to the floor but you gribbed the edge of the bed hard enough to turn your knuckles white, letting it pass with shaky breaths you tried to keep even. 

God you were dumb, but that was never going to change.

You just need to get better at being dumb, make them worry less. You laughed internally at the thought. 

Each step – well, shuffle because you didn’t have the energy to actually lift your feet to walk properly – was painful, sluggish, but manageable. You went slow to prevent yourself from stumbling into anyone or anything. The door to the observation was thankfully open to let some light in and you leaned against the wall of the hallway to take a moment of reprieve, muscles tense and heart beating a little faster than you’d like. 

Making your way down the hall, you found the elevator to the basement and slipped in, able to actually make sound when the heavy doors closed and the jolt of the mechanism moving sent a shock through your system. 

When the door slid open, Star stood with her arms crossed over her chest, leaning against the fall opposite of the elevator. 

“Has anyone told you that you don’t listen?” She crossed her ankles, comfortable where she was. “Seriously.” 

“All the time.” Shuffling from the elevator, you once more leaned against the wall. “Never listened, even as a kid. A fatal flaw.” 

“One of many. Sona is down the hall, where Minji was. I’m getting out of here for some proper sleep. Call if you guys need anything.” The scoff she let out was more of a laugh, knowing but understanding. “And do yourself a favor, Mouse…” 

She pushed off the wall, moving towards you, fixing the sling so it sat in the proper spot, even if the movement hurt. “Stop being the hero.” 

You did laugh, head twitch to the side. “Never thought of myself as the hero, more a backwards vigilant with issues.” 

Star nodded, patting you on the good shoulder. “Yeah, we all can see that. Take care of yourself.” 

“You too.” 

When the elevator closed behind her, you slowly made your way down the hall, the door to the cold room ajar but quiet beyond. Peering inside, Lex was passed out in a chair, multiple blankets covering her. However, Sona was awake, eyes on the ceiling, chest raising and falling calmly. She must have heard something because her head turned toward the door and your eyes met through the gap. 

“You can come in.” She sounded relieved, motioning you over. You had to gather yourself before pushing the door open, the chill making you shiver. “Don’t worry about Lex, she can sleep through anything apparently.”

Almost on queue, a grumbling, quiet snore left the third woman, but she didn’t move, dead asleep. 

Sona continued to motion you over, patting a free stop on the bed beside her. “Come here.” 

You managed to sit down on the edge, legs tired as you pulled them up and she moved some blankets to cover them. “How are you feeling?” 

She searched the air for an answer, but shrugged her shoulders. “Okay. They told me the surgery went well, just a lot of swelling, which is why they are keeping me down here, cold room and all.” 

She laid there stiffly, tubes and wires attached to her, many hidden under the layers of blankets. You took her hand in your uninjured one, sighing through your nose. She squeezed it tightly, keeping her eyes on the ceiling now. 

“Did Tessa come down here?” 

With a nod, Sona sighed. “She did, but I wasn’t ready to talk, she left me her number. I feel lost. Though I can’t feel it at all, when the doc came to check on me and try to get me to move, I did wiggle my toes which is a good sign, but there are a lot of unknowns. They said there was a good chance I could walk, but I’d still need a wheelchair for long distance or longer periods of time. It’s weird to think. Lex has been making all these promises, but I don’t want to be a burden.” 

“I’m not gonna sit here and tell you to suck it up and move on,” That made her roll her eyes, but a ghost of a smile was on her lips. “But don’t just give up, okay? Lex, SVT, and I…we have you. We’ll – I’ll – do everything possible to get you the best treatments, custom equipment if needed, all of it. I owe you a lot, probably more than you’ll accept me thanking you for, so I’m promising you that it will be one less thing to worry about in the long run, okay?” 

“Thank you.” Sona lessened her hold on your hand, but kept it in her own. “Are you okay? You look like shit.” 

“Give a girl a break, I got my ass kicked but still won.” You jeered, yet, her smiling a bit wider was enough to bring you joy. “I feel like ass, but I needed to see if you were okay, to thank you for all your help, and make my promise.”

You did smirk, shoulders shaking in a silent laugh. “Plus, I kinda can’t lose my favorite hair stylist and make-up artist.” 

“You are fucking horrible.” The laugh she let out was full, and she winced which made you both laugh more, both struggling with your pains. “But I guess I’m going to need another job so I’m glad I have my certifications. Probably a ‘lose some function, win a dream’?” 

“Okay, that was horrible.” 

“Yeah, it was, but coping like this is better than rolling myself off a cliff.”

“I second that.” 

Sona let your hand go and gave a pat to your non-bandaged leg. “Go get some sleep, Mouse. I’ll be here when you get up. We can torment each other then.”

“Is that a threat or a promise?” 

“Promise, because I’ll need your help staying above water too.”

It had been a long time since any of you had stepped into the house, a fine layer of dust covering different surfaces, the air stale, and something definitely smelled spoiled around the kitchen. 

Windows were opened, things were wiped down, and the fridge was deep cleaned fairly quickly upon arrival thanks to those who had full function of their bodies. Mingyu, while in some pain, ran the cleaning like the military, needing to make sure the house was clean and healing conducive while a short break was taken. 

Seungcheol was able to function on crutches, even if he struggled a bit with the large brace that kept his leg straight. Joshua had joined him on the crutches, a little more functional, but still as uncomfortable. Jeonghan was still in a wheelchair until further notice with one arm and leg down, though he didn’t care. He was happy to be pampered. You and Wonwoo were walking better, but bending over still fucked you both up enough that sitting down was a safer bet. 

While SVT couldn’t stop functioning fully, things were put on a slower schedule, less work but still productive. Those who were willing still guarded their warehouses, the shipping company still ran, but no major decisions were being made. Seungcheol paid everyone even if they needed a short sabbatical to come to terms with everything and families were taken care of for their lost family members. He announced that once each were cleared from medical treatment, you were getting out of the city to rest, no buts. Seokmin, Jihoon, and Seungkwan were ‘allowed’ to leave if the businesses needed help, but only because they lost rock paper scissors to Vernon, Chan, Soonyoung, Jun, and Mingyu. 

“I’m just suggesting that we order food instead of cooking tonight, Mingyu.” Seokmin rolled his eyes at the giant, seeing the childish pout on his lips. “It’s our first night back.” 

You sat on the couch beside a half asleep Wonwoo, watching the two argue. The sun had set, but the breeze that passed through the open windows was a welcomed crisp chill. Not freezing, but cool enough.

“But none of you will pick healthy options!” 

“Why does it matter? One night won’t kill us-” 

“Hey!” 

“That isn’t that I meant and you know it! Figure of speech!” Seokmin threw a dish towel at him. “Let’s have a vote. Take out or home cooked.” 

That vote ended quickly with takeout being the end result. Mingyu wasn’t happy, but everyone else was. Dinner ended up a little bit of everyone’s cravings; pork belly, traditional chinese dishes, tacos, and more. Left overs for days, but it might not last a full two. 

Sitting at the table together, whole, was honestly more healing than anything. No masks in front of each other, able to be yourselves authentically. Able to laugh at each other and help without expectations hanging in the air. 

It wasn’t hard to gather them to the couches after the table was cleared, an open statement of ‘we should talk’. 

Jun had stolen the beanbag chair he got you for Christmas from the basement and sat in it, making himself comfortable. You tried to sit in it, but getting up was a struggle and opted for the couch. 

Though you didn’t want to overwhelm them, you needed to start from the very beginning, divulging every single secret to them, from how Kihyun and Monsta X started everything to you contacting him. There was a lot of disappointment and surprise in their eyes, questions asked and answered that ripped back layers of your reasonings and self explanations. You were upfront with asking 99 line and Sona for help, for telling Rheia and her help in some of it. 

The 99 line part hurt Chan more than expected, heartbreak in his eyes. 

“Did you not trust us?” 

The question hung in the air, stealing your breath away enough that you needed to stand up, shaking your head. 

“No! No-” You tried to move your immobilized arm but grimaced in pain, unnecessary irritation bleeding into your mind. “I did trust you guys- I do trust you guys. I trust you with my life day in and day out. In that moment, those moments, it wasn’t about trusting you guys, it was trusting myself, and facing something – someone – more terrifying than fear itself.” 

You stood before all of them, seeing the range of emotions in all their eyes, the scrutiny, and you needed to say what was building inside for a while. 

“I knew you’d try to stop me and I couldn’t let you.” 

“Of course we would have stopped you, it could have gotten you killed!” Joshua shouted, but you didn’t flinch, you only stood taller. 

“Exactly.” The reply had him and a few others sitting back, confused. “You would have stopped me, would have started to hide things from me, you would have lied to me about important things. Ever since I came back from the dead, you’ve trained me to protect myself, but you also were hesitant. You didn’t want to let me do these things, you didn’t want me to be independent. You wanted me to be safe and hidden.” 

“That’s not-” 

“You, Cheol, and Jeonghan didn’t want me to be forward facing, be there to fight, everything was for protecting myself when it was needed, but protecting other people.” You pointed to Cheol. “Let’s start with him, he didn’t want me training to begin with, all of you knew that. Getting his approval was a pain in the ass. Jun, Minghao, Seungkwan, Mingyu, and Wonwoo didn’t baby me. Jihoon pushed my ass in weight training like he did with any one of you, maybe harder.” 

No one refuted your statements, but Seungcheol did have an understanding gaze in his eyes. That he didn’t like what you were saying, hurt by it even, but it was all true. 

“If I came to you, if I told you everything, you would have done everything in your power to stop it. Everything.” You motioned to the other men, mainly Jihoon and Minghao. “Let’s be honest, those two probably put two and two together but didn’t say a word because they also knew you’d stop me.” 

Jihoon tensed and turned his head away a little too quickly while Minghao gave a short nod. 

“I trust all of you immensely, but you didn’t trust me. That is why I did what I did. I’m sorry that I hid everything from you, I’m sorry that you have to find out like this, and I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you because of my actions. But I will not be sorry for making my own decision, albeit dumb. When I fell into SVT, things weren’t because I wanted to, they were because I needed to, but that changed. I did this because I wanted to, because I needed to. I’m not asking you to accept that, but accept that I am my own person with my own choices to make.” 

Your peace was said, finally, fully, something that needed to be heard and said to heal the part of yourself that needed to heal. The part that told you that you were still here, still alive, and still able to move forward from the trauma. No more living full of fear and hesitation, only the drive to live another day to the max, since you didn’t know what could happen next.

“I understand.” Seungcheol started when no one else did, clasping his hands in his lap. “I understand, and I accept your reasoning and apologies. You are right, I would have done everything within my power to stop you, and that was my mistake to place my trust in you differently than I do with the rest. I’m also sorry for that. It does hurt, to know that you trust us, but still thought you couldn’t let us help, but I understand.” 

You didn’t know you were holding your breath until you sighed it out, shoulders dropping. 

“Things are going to change, not even between us, but over all, and I don’t want to live with regret, guilt, or any of those looming feelings that can hurt me more than help.” Seungcheol nodded like he was reassuring himself more than others. “Going forward, all I ask for is honesty, from all of you. Full honesty, no lying, no going behind each others’ backs. We have to have one hundred present trust in this life. I don’t care if we get mad at one another or disagree, family fights, but we need to trust each other that we are doing everything because we want to, not out of obligation.” 

“Please don’t make us do some ‘hands in everyone’ type shit.” Jeonghan sat beside Seungcheol, silent most of the conversation. His comment earned him a light slap to his uninjured arm. 

“No, but now I should force you to for being a dick.” 

You sat back down, now between Joshua and Vernon, hearing the two oldest argue like an old married couple.

“I’m sorry.” Joshua whispered, leaning towards you. “Really, I’m sorry that I, or we, made you feel that way.”

“I’m a big girl, Shua.” You leaned into him and he put an arm over your shoulder, careful of the hurt one. “I can handle the things said to me, but I also know how to fight back.” 

“I know, and that’s why I’m still sorry. Cheol is right, you shouldn’t have a different type of trust than everyone else. That will change. I’ll make sure of it.” 

“Change takes time, but I’m happy to hear it.” Seungkwan somehow got involved in the argument with Seungcheol and Jeonghan, while others started to laugh. “Let’s take things one step at a time. Right now, we have all the time in the world.”

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Sucking in a deep breath, your shoulders were at your ears, tense to all hell. “I wish you could be home every night.” 

“I wish I was too, but I can’t. I have a duty to serve.” Jihoon rested his forehead against yours, arms encircling your waist, bond humming tenderly. “Maybe…we look into something to keep you company at home while I’m gone.”

“No, I’m barely gonna be able to take care of myself with you gone. Your mom is already ready to move in, which, very nice but I’d rather run in traffic.” Your soulmate threw his head back with laughter, shoulders shaking as the bond bursted with amusement. You couldn’t help but join in, leaning forward to rest your head on the middle of his chest. “I’m being serious.” 

“I know-” Laughter died down to small chuckles, resting his head atop yours. “But I’m also serious, a pet or something might be good for you to keep you busy at home.”

“Getting a pet is a big commitment that I’m not sure I’m ready for alone.” 

“Don’t say that, you can do it, my love.” Jihoon lifted his hand and delicately lifted your chin with his fingers. “It will keep you busy so you won’t feel as lonely. Think of all the pictures you can send me while I’m at work.” 

“Work.” You rolled your eyes but stole a kiss, pushing him back to waddle towards the couch. The back of his knees hit the edge first and he toppled down without a care, bringing you along with him. “I’d rather your work be music and dancing where you can come home and be at my side. And you are leaving me with Cheol and Joshua!” 

“Okay?” He sat up on his elbows, staring at your figure draping over his body. “They are your friends.” 

“They are, but they are also the most annoying brothers on the planet.” You propped your chin on his lower chest, a pout on your lips. Jihoon was simply enjoying this all from the emotions that flowed between you. “At least Hao doesn’t have to go into the military, I’d lose my mind if it was just Cheol and Joshua.” 

“Jun will also be around.” 

“How much do you think I can scam him to always pay for food?”

“A lot.”

“Bet.”

A hand was in your hair, lazily brushing through, untangling the strands as it went. Jihoon lied back, his other hand rubbing up and down your back. The silence stretched easily, the warm, gooey hum of the bond keeping you subdued even if the nerves of Jihoon leaving you for so long was looming. Nearly two years of his side of the bed being cold, not waking up the strumming of a guitar or the quiet notes of his keyboard when he had inspiration late into the night, and not being able to hold his hand or kiss him when you wanted. 

Internally it was over dramatic, yeah yeah, you knew that. There would be chances for him to come home here and there, rarely, but it would be the longest stretch you wouldn’t be attached to the hip since your first meeting or the ‘Japan Endeavor’. Which, you wanted to clear up, that name came from Mingyu and Seokmin rubbing their riveting, singular brain cell together, only one brain cell, just one. Two would be too generous.

But, back to your internal turmoil.

You were scared that your house wouldn’t feel like a home for the entire time he was away and-

“Ruby, I can practically hear the cogs turning in your head,” He poked at the middle of your forehead. “It’s going to be okay. You’ll take me to the entrance ceremony, we’ll speak to my battalion superior and make sure everything is worked out, and it will all work out.” 

“That doesn’t make my heart feel better.” You wrapped your arms around him the best you could, planning to savor every single moment with him until you couldn’t. “Four days until you go…” 

“Four days.” Jihoon repeated and you felt the deep intake of breath and the slow sigh he pushed out from his nose. “We’ll be okay.”

Aside from seeing the rest of Seventeen in their most recent concert stop in Incheon the night before he left, you and Jihoon stayed together, mostly at home. You lived off take out and caught up on shows he wouldn’t be able to see for the first few weeks he was in basic training. Stolen kisses and late night conversations were shared escapes with every minute closer to the impending semi-separation. Jihoon’s parents came to the last Incheon concert and spent the night, filling the room with an unspoken tang of pride and sadness to see their son serve the country. 

Bright and early the morning of his enlistment, all of Seventeen gathered outside of the training facility, exchanging hugs and words of encouragement. Pictures were taken and a few tears were shed (totally not yours…), but there were smiles all around. 

You walked hand in hand with Jihoon, his parents at your sides, feeling each and every ounce of reassurance he was trying to send. When he needed to go to his formation and you went with his parents, you almost refused to let him go, arms wrapped tightly around his waist. You sat through the entire ceremony without more tears until you were allowed to speak with him and his command one more time to finalize the daily meetings and other details, one being that he wouldn’t have his phone for three weeks but the meetings would be constant. The tears started as he whispered everything you needed to hear; every promise that he’d see you soon, that he’d be back home properly before you knew it, that he loved you. 

To say you kissed him like it was the last time was an understatement you both were not going to talk about at that moment, and he whispered that you were being a little over dramatic and you’d literally see him tomorrow, but you gave him a punch in the arm that even had the stern, harsh looking commander break the smallest smile.

“Tomorrow, eleven o’clock sharp, you hear me?”  Jihoon hummed, taking a step back. “Cross my heart and soul.”

It was nearly two in the morning, you couldn’t sleep and you desperately needed ice cream to cope. The bond felt stretched, thin even, but you still felt every emotion he had, all the anticipation and confidence. Every step was a little heavy, sad, but you were trying not to let it affect Jihoon by building up a small wall in your soul to dampen the feeling, hopefully. You had both learned to do that so no feeling was overwhelming unless it needed to be. 

You noticed the little fella on your trip to the corner store to get a treat, a small, scruffy little calico kitten. It was hiding under a small box shelter, probably something the corner store owner made for it, but its big, bright green eyes were staring up at you. Stopping in your tracks, you weren’t ready for the way your heart did a little flutter seeing the kitten. It was so cute, tiny, and it was too young to be out on the streets by itself. You’d never seen any other cats in the area with such a busy street around it. 

But you also tried to talk yourself out of taking it home, all the responsibilities, and the fact that you didn’t feel ready, even if Jihoon was probably right about needing a ‘friend’ at home. 

“This is a terrible idea.” You muttered to yourself, having picked up the box and coaxed the kitten inside, a bag full of ice cream and a small bag of kitten food in hand. “Who the hell just picks up a cat off the street?” 

You. 

You picked a cat off the street.

God damn it.

The kitten hadn’t made a peep since you started the short trek back to your home, only looking around or up at you. It curled up to the side closest to your body, probably warmed through the cardboard, as you typed in the code on the door keypad. Quickly you set the box on the kitchen island and placed your ice cream away. When you turned back, the kitten’s little head was peeking out the top, maybe trying to see around. 

“This is the dumbest thing I’ve done.” You stepped over to the box, peering inside. It backed up slowly, backside hitting the other side of the box, head tilting ever so slightly to the side. “I need help, don’t I…” 

So you called the one person you knew would be awake and mostly willing to help. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, Cheol, I need some help with-” The call ended before you could even get the words out. A text would have been better, probably. 

In the time it took for Seungcheol to get from his place to yours, you managed to get the kitten to the sink and gently place it, her, inside. She tried to jump out once but couldn’t because she slipped down, giving a squeaky meow in protest. You didn’t even need to unlock the door when he stumbled inside, the door code known to Seventeen, and he called out your name before finding you in the kitchen. 

“What’s wrong?” He scurried to your side, freezing in front of your sink at the little creature before him. “When did you get a cat?” 

He pointed to her and, to both of your surprise, she tensed up and hissed at him with all her might. 

“Well that is new.” The kitten hissed again when Cheol moved his hand away. “She didn’t hiss at me once in the entire time coming here. Maybe she doesn’t like you.” 

“She does not, animals love me.” Slowly, he reached towards the kitten, like an idiot, and again, she hissed at him, even swatted at his hand, no claws thankfully. “I stand corrected, and my ego is bruised now.”

“You are going to be no help to me then, damn it.” Pulling your phone from your pocket, you googled the best way to bathe a cat, but you weren’t too confident to do it alone. “Do you know anyone else that will be awake right now?” 

“Chances are Mingyu or Joshua, Vernon if we are lucky.” 

Mingyu was the only one to reply quickly, and more than willing to help after you sent a picture of your new house guest to him. He came with snacks and drinks, and his grin never left as he cooed at her. In comparison to Cheol, she loved Mingyu, rubbing her head against his hand and forearm. It took you and Mingyu, along with some help from Cheol, to get her rinsed and bathed, all of you glad you didn’t see any fleas or bugs on her, just dirt flowing down the drain. She complained the whole time, tiny, squeaky meows loud enough, only trying to escape once with no success. 

“Did you pick out a name for her?” Mingyu held her close to his chest with her wrapped in a towel, using your hairdryer to get her dry. She was loving every second of it since it was so warm, nearly falling asleep. 

“I’m not even sure if I’m going to keep her, ‘Gyu. I only picked her up off the street less than two hours ago.” 

Mingyu lifted her to his face, holding her head to his cheek as he pouted at you. “Come on, Ruby, look at her! Plus you need a companion at home with Jihoon in the military, you’re going to hole yourself up in here since you work from home and you can’t go on tour with us!”

“Did he put you up to this?” 

“He might have texted me yesterday about it…”

You flattened your expression and took the kitten back from him, almost instantly hearing the loud, unmistakable sound of purring coming from her. Your heart did that flutter again. Shit. 

Mingyu and Cheol had the biggest shit eating grins on their faces. 

You shooed them out of your home quickly after that, placing her back in the box as you found some towels, blankets, and anything else the internet could tell you was important. She was trying to look over the edge of the box as you worked and let out a whiny little sound when you disappeared into the guest bathroom. When you were back in her line of sight, she stopped, whining again when you left once more. Hm… 

After making a little space in the master bathroom for her, padding the floors, getting a food dish, and putting together a makeshift litter box, you placed her down on the floor, letting her explore around the area. You didn’t want to close the door, but needed a way for her to stay in the bathroom so you took some different items to make a little roadblock she couldn’t get over. 

You crawled into bed after checking she was okay and the exhaustion hit, sinking into the mattress. The bed felt cold, empty, and you didn’t have a warm, soul bound body to curl up beside. But you didn’t have much of a choice to try and sleep with how late (early?) it was. Maybe you’d get used to sleeping alone.

Your eyes closed for only a moment before the squeaking whines started, meow after meow ringing in from the bathroom. At first you tried to ignore it, throwing a pillow over your head, but she didn’t stop. Somehow she got louder. 

“Little dude, come on.” You tossed the pillow off your face, sitting up. You couldn’t see her over the little wall you made, but she didn’t stop. “Go to sleep, please.”

When she continued her wails, you stood up and shuffled over, peering down into the bathroom. She was pawing at the box you put in front of the door, batting at it as she cried out. Once her big eyes noticed you, she settled, sitting back, and gave a small, adorable meow. 

“Are you really gonna do this?” You sighed, kneeling down and reaching out to pet under her chin. “Will you scream all night?” 

Once she was quiet again, you stood, hoping that would be the end of your sleep getting interrupted, but she was back at it, meowing endlessly before you even made it back to bed. 

“Fine, okay!” Picking her up, along with a towel, you brought her over to the bed. She was purring louder than a jet engine in your arms, head rubbing whenever she could reach. “You are so lucky you are cute, do you hear me?” 

Spreading the towel down over Jihoon’s side of the bed, you placed her down and she flopped over, stretching out her little limbs before curling up. Your head hurt. 

You settled under the covers on your side, facing the kitten, watching the rise and fall of her little body with each breath. 

“What the hell am I gonna call you?”

The morning started earlier than you wanted, a rough start but when you opened your eyes and took in your surroundings, the kitten was sitting on your chest, little paws making biscuits near your collarbone. She was working the ‘dough’ gently, but you felt a prick of tiny claws and winced, feeling her instantly stop and settle, staring at you with large eyes. 

Reaching over for your phone, you groaned at the time, just after seven in the morning, barely four hours of sleep, and you were glad you took a few days off just to get used to being home alone and figuring out how to deal with it. It sucked you couldn’t even text Jihoon but you were glad to even see him every day. 

A small meow broke your train of thought, a small thump on your chest showed she sat down. “Good morning, little dude. Shall we get the day started?” 

When there was no argument, you sat up and took her with you, holding her close as you shuffled to the bathroom and pushed the box blocking the entrance aside. You placed her down before brushing your teeth and hair, hearing the telltale sound of munching on the food you left off for her the night prior. 

Closing your eyes, you sank into the bond, reaching out towards Jihoon’s side. He was calm, collected, feeling tired, even nervous, and an unmistakable feeling of longing was ever present. You’d need to let that guide you until getting the chance to see him later. 

A paw patting against your ankle had you looking down, a small tilt to her head. 

“I’m thinking of making breakfast cookies for the guys since they have practice. Thoughts?” She patted your ankle again then placed both paws on you to stretch out her back. “Yeah, I’m tired too. Let’s go.” 

With her calm demeanor, you decided you could place her on the kitchen counter on a blanket as you worked, getting her all set up and comfortable. She didn’t hesitate to lay down, little head resting on her paws as you started to gather ingredients and supplies. 

“Okay, flour, maple syrup, oil, vanilla, Since Vernon is allergic, no peanut butter-” A meow stopped you from talking, peering over to her. “What?” 

She was quiet now. 

“Peanut butter?” She meowed. “Peanuts?” Nothing. “...Butter?” 

Once more she meowed at the word and bit your lip to stop from laughing. “You like the name Butter? Really?” She stood and stretched out her limbs, sitting patiently on the blanket. “I’m going to have to call you that for the rest of your existence then, Butter.” 

As you made the cookies, batch after batch, enough to feed all of the members and dancers, Butter either watched you with bright green eyes or made biscuits in the blanket she was sitting on. After an hour, you let her down on the ground and didn’t hear a peep as she explored the apartment. You did see her run from the living room and down the hall, out of sight, before she jetted back and bounced around. 

Then you had the best idea… 

“Ruby~” Mingyu practically skipped over, stopping dead when he saw the small animal carrier you had rushed to buy in your hand, “You did keep her!” 

“Ay, give me a break here, okay.” You placed the carrier down on the floor as others began to come over, curiosity in their eyes. First you pulled out the cookies and handed the two containers over, specifying that one went to their dancers, before you squatted down. “Alright, before any of you ask, I still need to take her to the vet, she is little so don’t spook her, and she doesn’t like Seungcheol. Also, her name is currently Butter.” 

“Butter?” Joshua snorted, joining you closer to the floor as you opened the cat carrier.

Butter, though her tail was straight up and her back was a little arched, stepped out towards the exit of the carrier, looking up with big eyes. The cooing started almost instantly and she tensed even more, which made you slowly reach out and pick her up, pulling her close to your chest. 

“This is Butter, I found her at two in the morning, and she is a whiny bastard that kept me up until she slept in my bed.” 

“See! You needed a little friend.” Mingyu hummed, moving closer to pet Butter on the head, which she leaned into. 

“She is so little.” Seungkwan hummed, reaching his hand out gently to test if she was okay with him before scratching under her chin. “Are you going to bring her to see him?” 

“Oh god, I can’t give him the satisfaction yet. I’m not even sure if I’m fully keeping her since there is a lot to do about it.”

“You definitely need to keep her.” Jun grinned, nose scrunched up with a grin as he pet behind her ears, seeing her lean into the touch. “To keep you company while we are gone and Jihoon is gone.”

“I said that last night when Ru called me over!” Mingyu looked satisfied with himself, hands placed triumphantly on his hips, chest puffed out. “You need her and she needs you.” 

“You just won’t give up, dude.” You gave a heavy roll of your eyes, only for Butter to be taken from your arms and right into Jun’s. “Hey-” 

“Don’t listen to them, Butter. We will make sure Ruby keeps you.” Jun looked so happy, huddled into a little circle with a few of the others. 

Seungcheol slid up to your side, arms crossed over his chest. “Can’t believe she doesn’t like me. Animals love me.”

“Maybe she hates you and will like Jeonghan.” 

“If that is true, I’m jumping off a cliff.” 

“Only time will tell.”

You watched as Jun placed Butter down on the ground, him crouching down to scratch under her chin before she was wandering off curiously. Seungkwan and Chan followed behind her a bit, snickering to themselves as she batted at different wires and pieces of equipment, sniffed at some bags. Most of the staff and dancers were happy entertaining her, only for her to wander around more. When satisfied with her exploration, Butter pranced her way over to your leg, taking a longer way to avoid Seungcheol (which made him pout), and sat down beside your foot. 

“You should probably leave.” Joshua glanced down at his watch then to Butter who was sitting beside your leg. “What are you going to do with her?” 

“Hyeji, she is going to watch her while I go see Ji.” You gathered her into the carrier, easily setting her inside without a struggle. 

“Are you going to tell him about her?” Minghao hummed, head cocked to the side. 

“Not yet, I want to determine my options and take her to the vet.”  Seungkwan leaned over to Vernon, arms crossed over his chest. “Definitely keeping.”

The process to get into the military training facility wasn’t hard, it only took forever to verify your identity. You were a few minutes early, sitting in an open room with multiple small tables, walls mostly bare, but large windows letting in the late morning light in. You felt the warmth on your skin, but your leg bounced violently under the table and swore you heard the ticking of the click on the wall. There was another couple speaking quietly in a corner table, holding hands across the table, and you were starting to feel the effects of the lack of sleep. 

You felt the hum in the bond: the golden string that tied you both together for the rest of your lives. The closer Jihoon got, the warmer your bond felt, and you felt horrible knowing it would come and go as you visited.

When the door opened and Jihoon stepped inside, dressed in his military uniform, you stood quickly, eyes locking across the way. He didn’t hesitate to step over quickly, hurried, and pulled you close. The moment you were in his arms, you felt the world stop, and the rush of the soulbond had the walls you’ve been keeping up come crashing down. Your arms wrapped around his body and pressed your face into his neck, hearing the quiet rumble of his laughter. 

“It’s only been a day.” He teased you but there was no hiding the relief and joy that came from his side. 

“Already too long.” Your english was muffled into his skin and he chuckled once more, running his hands slowly up and down your back. 

Though you didn’t want to, you took a step back, placing your hands on his chest then smoothing out the wrinkles you caused. You were trying not to tear up, already failing, but he cupped your face gently and smiled so smittenly that you let a single tear fall. Jihoon didn’t hesitate to wipe it away and motioned for you to sit down. His hands found yours across the table the moment you sat, thumbs running over your knuckles. 

“How was your first day?” You cleared your throat and he was trying not to grin even wider at your attempt to have a normal conversation. 

“Good, busy, but nothing I can’t handle.” He leaned on his elbows, and he almost unconsciously fidgeted with your wedding ring. “Better than when I was a trainer.”

You huffed a laugh, noticing that his wedding band and group rings were missing, and you took his left hand into yours. “Where-” 

“I can’t wear them during training.” Jihoon’s shoulders slumped and he sighed. “But they are with my things, don’t worry.” 

It left a sour taste in your mouth. You understood why, you didn’t like it though. 

He noticed the discontent in the bond and lifted your hands, kissing the back of them, touchy despite his issues with public displays of affection. You were glad it wasn’t just you who felt a little clingy. 

“You’re tired.” He voiced the one thing you didn’t want to talk about, raising an eyebrow. “And you were feeling all sorts of weird last night.”

“I’m fine.” You will not tell him about the kitten yet… “Couldn’t get to sleep without you, went to the corner store for ice cream.” 

“Great coping.” His voice was laced with sarcasm and you pinched his palm, making him draw his hands back. “Hey-” 

“Don’t make fun of your spouse. I’m not sure how I will cope with this.” 

“Ru,” Jihoon’s tone softened, sugary sweet, loving. “We’ll get through this. That's why I suggested a pet or something, it will keep you busy.” 

You must have made a face because he laughed, bright and happy. “It isn’t the same, Ji.”

“I know, but it will be easier.” 

You were still not going to give him the satisfaction, changing the topic to wanting to really know how his first day went. Jihoon rambled on and on for the hour you had about the men he was serving with, his superiors, and mentioned some stories they already shared between breaks. He said that almost all of them didn’t treat him like he was a celebrity and he was loving the moments of being Lee Jihoon, not Seventeen’s Woozi. 

By the time you needed to leave, you held onto him tighter than before, that slow, sinking feeling in your heart hitting full force. Jihoon tucked you into his chest, whispering sweet nothings to you which you murmured right back. Another officer cleared his throat, really pushing that time was up and Jihoon only cupped your face with both hands, placing a kiss to your forehead first, something he always did, then another to your lips. 

“I’ll see you soon.” 

You kissed him one last time, watching him take a step back, hands falling from you. “It will never be soon enough.” 

Your meetings daily got easier, less strained, more calm. Sometimes you’d sit in silence, side by side, letting the sun blanket you both through the windows. Other days, you’d both talk and talk until time was up, and the promise that you'd be back the next day carried you through everything. It got much better when you could at least text or call him, made you feel close when you both were having difficult days and couldn’t wait for the next afternoon to see one another in person. 

Butter…still wasn’t brought up, even though – at some point – you did decide to keep her. The pestering of your friends didn’t help and somehow Jihoon had gotten to your grandparents and they pushed for it too. Her first vet visit went amazing, and she was surprisingly healthy, only needing some shots and a comment to gain a little weight. She was cuddly as ever, fitting into your side at work or curled into your neck as you watched TV on the couch. You brought her to Seventeen’s dance practices more often, even if it was to get out of the house during your lunch break. Though she was growing, she was still small, and the vet believed she was a runt, which is why she was just out on the street. 

You wouldn’t admit that she was an amazing companion…But she was. She was exactly what you needed to get through the days. (And she still didn’t like Seungcheol.)

Then…Jihoon had a slight surprise when you went to see him months into his enlistment: a few days off to just be at home and relax. 

And you had two options; come clean about Butter or wait. 

And everyone thought it would be funny for you to wait, so you did. 

“I’m ready to just stay in and chill. I don’t want to go anywhere.” You were both walking up to the door to your home, some groceries in hand to make everything he requested. 

“The guys might come over, but if you don’t want them to, I can tell them no.” 

Jihoon moved to punch in the passcode to the door, snorting. Your bones were buzzing “And none of them will listen.” 

“They don’t…doesn’t help that Jeonghan comes home so some days he has just come here after work to have dinner with me.” 

“Oh he has told me.” Jihoon finally pushed the door open, not even taking a step before you both heard the loud, happy meow from Butter. 

Jihoon froze in the doorway and you had to look over his shoulder to see the little calico sitting near the door, a red collar around her neck with a bell Mingyu insisted she needed. 

“Ru,” He dropped his voice, speaking quietly. “When did you get a cat?”

“So,” You pushed on his back until he moved further into the entrance way, closing the door in case she tried to escape. “I’ve been keeping a secret.” 

Butter, ever the curious girl, was already trotting up to him, giving him tentative sniffs before she went right to business. She bonked her head into his ankle, rubbing herself all over his pants leg with a fervor that you’ve seen when she wanted attention once she was comfortable. When he didn’t jump straight into petting her, she started to meow on and on before you picked up her easily. She rubbed her head into your shoulder, purring loudly.

Jihoon was staring at her, eyes wide, then he glanced at you with furrowed brows. “What do you mean you’ve been keeping this? How long?” 

He set the grocery bags down, reaching out slowly. Butter didn’t startle so he went forth with petting her. 

“She’s been here since…the day you left for the military…” 

Once more, Jihoon froze, head jerking back at the information you’ve been hiding for months. “Is that why everyone was texting me to enjoy the surprise? I thought it was-” 

“Do not finish that statement, Lee Jihoon.” 

Though he was mad that you kept the secret for so long (and asked a million questions the entire day), you couldn’t deny that he loved her. Butter had followed him around almost instantly, pawing at him, being close to him, anything. The three of you had gone down for a nap, curled up in bed together because he desperately missed cuddling as he slept, and she had placed herself at his head on the pillow. 

You had gone to make dinner the first night and caught them playing on the living room floor and you swooned at how adorable they looked. Jihoon didn’t see you snap any pictures or pictures, but the group chat with the rest of the guys had blown up when you sent everything in. 

Resting on the couch, curled up under a thick blanket, trying to catch up on some shows you wanted to watch together, Jihoon held you close, chest to your back, eyes more on you than the screen. Butter was in your arms, fast asleep from all the fun, but perfect in her place.

“This is all I could have asked for.” He said somewhere in the middle of an episode, strong arms holding you firmly to him. 

“Yeah?” You peered over your shoulder and he didn’t hesitate to kiss you, all love and tenderness that he’s been deprived over. “Sorry for keeping secrets.” 

“I don’t care.” Jihoon whispered the words against your lips, knocking his head lightly into yours. “I’m just happy we are here, together, and with a new little family member.”  You couldn’t help the grin on your face, reaching up to run your hand through his slightly grown buzzcut. You’d never change a moment of how your lives turned out, the bond buzzing with adoration and bliss. “Our perfect little family.”

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Joker’s stance was fragile, easy to be seen and exploited since he was thinking with heightened emotions rather than brains. You kicked forward, hitting him almost fully in the front of the knee, and he let out a distressed growl, teeth gritted. He dropped his center enough for you to swing hard, bringing your elbow to his face. The sweet sound of bone cracking again was blissful, sickeningly satisfying. It made your body buzz, even if the same crunch of bone should have been triggering. 

“Filthy bitch!” He staggered back but held on to you, his nose was bleeding, catching in his mouth, and he deliberately spit at you, landing on the front of your sweatshirt. 

With your elbow again, you landed another hit to his face, hoping for another crack of bone but none came, enough to get out of his hold, creating some distance to right yourself. “I’ve been called worse, gotta try better.”

The buzz in your body only grew, now a slight bounce in your stance, on your toes, hands up in defense. “For the guy that strangled me, your fighting skills are ass.” 

“Taunting does nothing.” It wasn’t convincing when he looked ready to gut you. Blood trickled down from his nose, dropping down his chin onto his shirt and the floor. His nose was more crooked than the last time you broke it, it had you grinning inside.

You were the first to grab a knife, light but sharp, doubled edged, one similar to what Jun trained you with as time went on. You prayed his teachings would stick out in your mind as Joker did the same, tugging a knife from a sheath at his side, similar in size yet only one sided.

You don’t know who moved first, or if you moved at the same time, but you crashed in a storm of slashes and anger, fervorous. Somehow, in the moment, you thought of it like a dance, choreography unknown but the tempo just right. Deadly, flowing, exhilarating. It had you thinking rather than feeling, something needed to stay ahead. You were glad Mingyu and Wonwoo used to provoke you to rein in your emotions, mainly anger, during fights. 

Joker was the opposite of that, brute and brawn, no rhythm, forceful. The complete opposite of how Mingyu trained you. He taught you to be strong but move easily, flow with every action and reaction, avoid as many hits as possible to wear your opponent out, giving you a higher advantage. Never be winded first, converse energy.

Though he was a brute, he was fast and mostly focused, landing a hit or cut on the closest part of you to him. A straight punch to the abdomen, most of the shock absorbed by the vest but it did have you taking a step back, faltering. If he noticed you had on a kevlar vest, he didn’t voice it, only changing tactics. 

He got a cut to your upper arm, close to your shoulder, sliding through your sweatshirt and skin beneath. You could feel the blood running down your arm, warm and sticky. It stung, burned even, but that was maybe muscle strain from each dodge and countering hit. You think he cut you a few other places, feeling the warmth seep through, but nothing truly hurt aside from your arm at the moment.

Blow for blow, slash or stab, you avoided as much as you could. You landed punches when it mattered, knocking one of the many blades from his hand, only for another to appear, taking hits when you couldn’t avoid anything else. Little cuts added up on him, enough to know it was painful, but not enough to stop him. He did get the upper hand once, just after a punch to the side of your head. It allowed a good stab to your side, below the edge of the vest, not too deep thanks to your quick thinking, but that hurt like a bitch and you tried not to protect that side too much. If you made it out alive, you’d be forced on bed rest for a while. You wouldn’t even protest really.

But, to your pleasure, his stance was becoming more and more faulty, uncoordinated, tired. 

You managed to swipe up once previously, landing cleanly in the tango of body and blades, right up his upper thigh, slashing up to his waist. There was no resistance in the blade cutting through clothes and skin, a testament to how sharp your knife was. It was deep, seeping blood like your arm, and he staggered, muscles tensing under the stress as he yelled out, surprised. If it was possible, his eyes would be red with animosity. He was running out of steam already. You needed to tip it over the edge. 

“I’d be pissed too if a bitch was kicking my ass.” You heard a sound come from Kihyun, low and rumbling, a laugh. You stopped from rolling your eyes.

Slowly reaching towards your hip as Joker righted himself, you removed some throwing knives Seungkwan got you after your first session with him, a gift for your new skill, from their sheath. Sleek and lightweight, lethally pointy, scarily sharp based on the cut you gave yourself from handling them the first time. Maybe a hit or two would be sufficient to further slow him.

Before he had a chance to come at you again, you were already sending the blades streaking across the room hastily, little aim, all prayers, and hearing all the disappointment in a voice eerily similar to Seungkwan’s in your head. 

One landed home in his shoulder, rooted deep into the skin, another whizzed past him, barely missing Kihyun who didn’t even react. Joker jerked back, hand going to his shoulder to tear the blade from his body and threw it to the floor, blood covering the item. He started towards you quickly and you threw a third in his slighted distraction, hard and fast, a resounding yell of pain as it embedded into his stomach. The leg you slashed gave out under him and he fell to his knees, shouting expletives in your direction. Each word bounced off of you easily, unbothered of them. 

He panted harshly, trying to muster enough strength but the strain was too much for him. Blood was soaking his clothes and he barely had the energy to pull your third blade from his stomach. His hands were shaking as he curled in on himself to hopefully protect anything else important.

You moved forward, slow with a grace you didn’t know you could possess in the moment, catching your breath. Your heart beat wildly in your chest, the sound pulsing in your ears, quieting the already subdued space. 

For once, Joker actually looked fearful, a realization passing his eyes, like he knew what was coming. Behind him, unmoving, Kihyun watched on, pride in his gaze. 

It made you sick to your stomach, uncomfortable. Like he was watching two caged animals fighting to survive, which wasn’t too far off from the reality of it all. You were fighting to survive, and clearly, you were winning.

Though the stab in your lower abdomen hurt with each movement, you raised your leg and kicked him to the ground, body landed with a pained thud on his side that vibrated something in your broken, dark soul. A feeling of power that you greedily basked in.

You don’t know what possessed you to do it, but you squatted down beside him, looking down at him like something crushed under your shoes. He bared his teeth to you, pissed, trying to reach for his last knife but you caught his wrist easily and threw it aside. The air was metallic this close, evidence of the blood already shed, sharp and coppery, rusty. 

Joker tried to rise from the ground, and you let him, heaving the huffing and puffing of each breath. Sadistically, you jerked your hand out and grabbed the shoulder the dagger found home in earlier. You squeezed his shoulder tightly and Joker withered in pain, biting back as much of his pained groans he could. 

“This,” You dug your thumb into the wound, blood staining your hand, inside. Your nails dug into the surrounding skin and Joker wailed in agony. “Is for your orders to fire, for Mingyu, digging bullets from his body, watching him nearly die.” 

You pressed down harder, the sound of his cries growing louder, bouncing off the walls. Blood was flowing out around your thumb, streaming down his shoulder and your arm to the floor, pooling there thickly, light from above reflecting on it. If you weren’t so detached, you’d say it might look pretty. Might.

As quick as you had your hand in his wound, you stood, hand bloody, lifting your foot and bringing it down hard on the wound on his thigh, digging your heel into the limb. He went rigged before the withering became worse, flailing his body, desperate to get away, trying to claw against the floor to escape. But there wasn’t one, there never would be a way to escape fate. You removed another knife from your waistband, pushing your leg down harder, putting your full weight into it. 

When you thought it was enough for the time being, you grabbed a fist full of his hair, newly found strength letting you pull him up enough that he moved to his knees. His hands grabbed at your wrist, nails in your skin, but followed your pulling until he was facing Kihyun. The other had his hands in his pockets, still in the same place, still smirking. 

You sighed out heavily, bringing the blade to Joker’s neck.  He tried to beg for mercy, for you to be reasonable. A ridiculous act for an arrogant, egotistical man. 

“You weren’t reasonable when you hurt me. You had fun.” Your voice was calm, even, vacant, and your eyes were on Kihyun until you tightened your grip on the knife’s hilt and closed your eyes. “There is no mercy in revenge.” 

 A quick jerk of your hand had the blade slicing across his neck, a strangled, wet sound ringing through the air.

The hands that once held your wrist fell to his sides, body going limp on your hold, feeling him go lifeless. The rust smell grew tenfold, heavy in the space, plainly intoxicating. 

Your eyes opened to land on Kihyun again, looking down on you with that same pride from early, pleased. Slowly, you released your grip on Joker’s hair, his body landing in a heap of his own pool of blood. 

There was silence outside of your breathing, neither said a word long enough.

“Well done,” Kihyun broke the veil of reticence, removing his hand from his pockets, a slow, taunting clap starting. “Well done, Mouse.”

Calm. Controlled. Foreseeing. 

It’s how Minghao would describe himself in these situations. He was never one for frantic action or rushed confrontation. There was a method he would follow, a thought process of who and what was next, almost never a question, more a statement, a fact.

He moved fluidly, taking down people one by one, left and right, either by bullet or blade, a state he found well within himself. It was in his blood, his upbringing, something honed and disciplined. Oddly comforting, oddly controlled for an out of control time. When things got too dicey, either a double or triple team, a shot would ring, loud and certain, hitting its mark with similarly trained precision. Jun always had his back even in the worst situations. A match made in hell, but brothers nonetheless. 

He kept the rest of SVT in his sights, always near, always watching, even if he needed to watch his own back more often than not. If he needed to jump in and help, he was there, no matter what. It’s what family did for one another.

Minghao wouldn’t say he found joy in fighting. Since joining SVT, it was an evil he couldn’t avoid fully, but it wasn’t like when he was indoctrinated, forced to with no reason or rhyme. With SVT, there was a reason, there was a choice, there was freedom. He could say no to anything Seungcheol told him to do at any time, no questions asked, an understanding. Even when Mouse gave orders, he saw her grace in the way she addressed the crew, the choice she gave him, but he knew he wouldn’t have backed down from this fight even if he was told he could. 

The warehouse was loud, yelling, shouting, pained gasps, gargling on one's own blood. It should have made his stomach flip in disgust. An average person definitely would, but he wasn’t average or normal, never was, never allowed to be until he was older. Not that he really was normal. In the past he would have said he was a monster, molded to harm and kill, to be in line and never question what the handlers told him to do. Now, he’d say he was simply different, still a monster, but less so, an acceptable monster with the ability to feel emotions, feel empathy. No longer a trained sociopath, but just enough of one. 

The ringing in his ear, somehow, was welcoming, drowning out the worst of the sound, but it stabilized him, not full tunnel vision, but enough to stay alive, ‘locked in’ as Mingyu liked to joke. He was hurt, he could feel it in the sting from a blade somewhere on his body, multiple some wheres, and a stray shot that hit the kevlar, too close for comfort to his upper chest that knocked the wind out of him. 

Soonyoung had been there after the shot to cover him, a wild, blood lusted look in his eyes as he slashed down the enemy with fucking katanas. Like some anime character. He jumped over falling bodies with a lightness only Soonyoung could muster, an unstoppable force that would need time to come down after, always the first into the fight and the last to snap out of the ravenous daze. 

But he couldn’t question it when it worked. Never questioned the method to his brothers’ madness, only a figure there to help guide out from the darkest corners. 

Blood now stained his hands, knife finding purchase in the neck of a large, stocky man. His energy was still high but his muscles were starting to protest. It felt like the fight was going on forever, Monsta X’s people never ending. 

Wonwoo was in a fight with Changkyun, neck and neck last he checked, both littered with injuries. Mingyu and Seokmin were in two on one with Shownu that wasn't truly going their way. Mingyu had a long slash to his arm, the limb seemingly dead weight at his side based on how it hung, luckily his non-dominant arm. Why none of them drew guns was beside him, foolish but maybe it was some long con, who knows. It wasn’t his style. Quick and efficient was his preferred way. Why fight longer than needed when a gun does the job? He could argue with them later about it, call them idiots at a more appropriate time.

He dodged some spindly man, all limbs with barely any meat on his bones. He misstepped and Minghao took the opportunity to lodged a bullet into his chest without hesitation, point blank. The man dropped like a sack of flour, gasping for air that would never come, clutching – no, clawing – at his chest.

He didn’t let himself linger, moving onto the next, and the next, and the next. One after another. 

He felt no remorse, but his mind wasn’t fully within the walls of the warehouse, not really. What he was doing was autopilot, years of skill that didn’t need thought to go into action, only the idea of action. Worry was in the pit of his stomach, heavy and distracting. Distracting enough to miss someone aiming at him, the bullet grazing his outer mid-thigh, sending him to his knee in surprise.

Gritting his teeth to hold in the yell his body wanted to let out, the gun in his hand was sending three near perfectly aimed shots into the person. 

“Fuck-” He managed to let out, someone’s hand grabbing his upper arm, tugging harshly. 

“Get up!” Hyunjin was loud in his ear, tugging harder to get Minghao to his feet, both meeting the rebid eyes of Minhyuk stepping closer. 

It took more energy than he’d like to admit to raise to his full height. He was glad he decided on all black to hide the blood that soaked the fabric and his skin. Practical, he told himself earlier. 

Minhyuk had a gun drawn, two actually, both hands full of short range pistols. He raised them, a wide, putrid grin on his face, and started firing, one after enough, alternating guns like it was a game. 

They couldn’t get out of the way in time, still fleeing, feeling the harsh push back and burn that came with hot metal piercing skin. A few hit the vest, thankfully, protecting anything vital, but one lodged into his shoulder, maybe through and through but he couldn’t tell. All he knew was that his arm felt numb and lifeless, but hurt like a motherfucker. There was another shot of pain in his side, radiating, sharp, annoying.

Hyunjin let out a distressed shout, stumbling beside Minghao. He managed to hold Hyunjin up, weaving through bodies, barely dodging the fighting around them. Someone was calling his name, friend not foe, but he kept moving, bringing Hyunjin further back, away from Minhyuk and Monsta X’s crew. Towards those meant to handle the injured, towards the vault. 

Hyunjin was limping, slowly growing more and more dead weight in Minghao’s mostly uninjured arm. When he finally looked, it wasn’t good. There was a graze to his face, blood streaking down his face and neck. One leg had two holes in the thigh while the other had one a deep graze, blood running to the floor and leaving a bright trail in their wake. 

Minghao heard Minhyuk behind them, following, stalking like a predator. 

He was ready to drop Hyunjin and spin around to knock the man down, fire rounds into him like he did them, but he didn’t have to. A flash of blond hair and lanky limbs ran past his vision, straight into the danger, somewhere he shouldn’t be based on where he was supposed to be stationed in an office, shooting people down. 

As fast as Minhyuk might have been, Jun was faster, agile and flawless. By the time Minghao fully turned, still holding Hyunjin, Minhyuk was on the ground and he didn’t have a single chance. Jun already was thrusting a knife into his chest, straight into his heart from the position. No elaborate display of capability.

“Let’s get you both back.” Jun called over his shoulder, standing up with flourish only he could muster in the given situation, rushing to help the two.

Seungkwan was used to being in the back line, guns at a distance rather than fully in someone’s face. Though he was great at hand to hand, one of the best in the group, he would rather stay back. Protecting rather than on the offensive. 

It was his task now, having moved from the front towards the back moments after the fight broke out, standing shoulder to shoulder with a variety of people to protect those in the vault, currently housing those they could get out of danger. Minghao and Hyunjin were back there, one more injured than the other, and his heart was in his throat.

He wouldn’t say he was nervous, rather adrenaline buzzed through his body like an addictive drug that he couldn’t get enough of. It was exhilarating and kept him on his toes, eyes scanning the area for any issues. 

His mother would have a field day if she heard what happened, disappointed but barely surprised. His sisters? They’d pat him on the back and tell him good job, the perks of having sisters in similar business, even if they could never tell their mother. She’d kill them rather than him.

Seungkwan couldn’t see everything from his position, but it was enough to know things were going well. Well, he thought so, he couldn’t see much besides the bodies trying to come at him mid clip change, others taking them down with ease. 

Minghao, though one arm down, still bleeding though vaguely wrapped up, and favoring his left side, stepped up beside him, hand gun tight in his grip.

“You back inside!” Seungkwan hollered, barely taking his eyes off the playing field, firing off shots to hold back any opposing crew member. “You are fucked up.” 

“Not fucked up enough.” Unlike his current demeanor, Minghao was sedated, calm, raising the gun in hand to defend the injured. Always the show off. It had Seungkwan rolling his eyes. They’d bitch at each other later about it, whenever later came.

They let those hurt through, some dragged, definitely dead, while others wouldn’t make it through the night. Some bodies didn’t even make it, laying lifeless on the floor, being stepped over or stepped on, no dignity in it. He couldn’t let it affect him, not yet, not now. Those emotions were for private spaces, away from prying eyes, when he could mourn and grieve safely. He bit the inside of his cheek firmly. Focus.

His eyes found Vernon and Chan in the crowd, holding their own with little need for help at the moment, they were back to back, covering each other the best they could. They looked like they were having fun, which should have been disturbing, but it wasn’t. 

They found the fun in any moment to not go crazy with their lives. It’s why Vernon smoked and DJed for Jihoon’s and other clubs. He always said the drugs and music were enough of a distraction from what they did daily. Seungkwan didn’t always agree but it wasn’t his place to judge. It’s why Chan, though he wouldn't admit it, picked up dancing years ago to let off steam. Seungkwan wouldn’t tell him he found his mostly faceless dance cover social media page over a year ago and supported him on an alternative account. The poor kid would be red in the face if he knew.

But his eyes caught on the fight Wonwoo was in with Changkyun again, still with knife and hands, having been there for a bit now, but time wasn’t making sense in the chaos. He couldn’t tell. 

The knicks and cuts were adding up along both of their bodies, blood staining the shirt Wonwoo wore bright red. If Wonwoo truly needed the help, Jihoon wasn’t far away, but he was in his own fight with Shownu now, having joined in on the fight with Mingyu and Seokmin, even if the tallest was down an arm like the man beside him. Bodies and blood littered the floor around them. 

To his surprise, Shownu was holding well in the three (two and a half with Mingyu’s arm messed up) on one fight, all muscle and strength, Seokmin was thrown to the ground while he was defending against Jihoon. Mingyu was holding off crew members trying to help Shownu with slower and slower reactions. He was losing a lot of blood again. The cut on his arm wasn’t clotting well with how deep it was and the constant movement. He should be over here getting some sort of treatment but Seungkwan couldn’t worry about that right now, not when Wonwoo let out a cry so painful Seungkwan’s blood ran cold. 

“Help him.” Minghao barely finished before Seungkwan was barreling towards Wonwoo and Changkyun. 

He could see it now, a knife stabbed deep into Wonwoo’s lower stomach, near his hip, jutting out, bleeding but not profusely, and another in his opposite thigh, in the side, like Changkyun attacked with both hands, each side, clapping the knives into him like skewers. Wonwoo was on the ground, glass smashed somewhere off to the side, long broken and lost to the fight. 

Changkyun was closing in with slow steps, vile gratification in his eyes as he pulled a gun for a holster at his side. Seungkwan didn’t think, he acted, getting closer, raising his gun with every heavy step forward, fast, and fired two shots, both landing at an angle in the raggedly breathing chest of Changkyun. Shock crossed his face, the arm holding out the gun still out for the shot, and Seungkwan fired enough, aiming higher, and his final shot dropped him. The splatter that flew into the air was in slow motion, the bullet he fired burning straight into the side of Changkyun’s neck. Blood sprayed out for a moment as he fell, body colliding with the floor in a cold thud. 

Wonwoo was pushing himself back with one arm and leg, breathing wildly. Seungkwan reached him and did the only thing he could, holstering his gun.

He grabbed at the straps of the vest, the best leverage he could get his hands on, and shouting for cover he started to drag Wonwoo back. “Don’t pull them out, I swear to god, Wonwoo. I’d kill you before the blood loss does.” 

The other man was cursing, yelling, trying to keep it together with two blades sheathed in his skin. Minghao rushed up, despite the pain on his face and stood beside the two, back to them as he walked them backwards to the vault. 

Seungkwan got him to one of the assigned ‘medics’, but Minghao half collapsed beside him, injuries finally catching up to him. 

“Fucking idiot, both of you.” Seungkwan called someone over, pointing to Minghao with so much judgement his sisters would be proud, “Handle him, now.” 

“I’m fine,” Minghao tried to argue, but fell short when he tried to stand but ended up on the ground once more, eyes out of focus, dizzy. The gauze on his shoulder was soaked through. One of their crew, or Mouse’s, was getting him to lay down, putting hard pressure on the wound in his shoulder. He heard something about it being a clean through, but it didn’t settle his nerves. 

“Damn it, it hurts.” Wonwoo spoke through clenched teeth, stating the obvious, trying to not move, but failing as his limbs twitched. 

“No shit, you have two knives in you. Don’t touch them.” Seungkwan swatted at Wonwoo’s hand near the knife in his side, and started to wrap up and bandage any smaller cuts, knowing they were all he could handle for the time being. His eyes flicked to Hyunjin, being treated, trying to keep his eyes open. “We can’t do anything about them without the risk of you bleeding out.” 

Though sounding calm, he was anything but. He was trying not to shake.

Wonwoo leaned his head back, a wave of haze rushing over his face and Seungkwan cursed loudly. “Don’t pass out yet, talk to me, anything.” 

“Everything hurts.” It was weak, but a start. “And I’m fucking pissed.” 

“Which thing are you pissed about?” He had to rip the lower hem of Wonwoo’s shirt to get around the knife, trying to be careful but the other hissed in pain. 

“This stupid fight, fucking Mouse, everything.” Wonwoo tried to lean away but Seungkwan firmly stopped him, blood slipping out from around the knives. “I’m gonna kick her ass.” 

“I think we all are going to, but she is smart.” 

“The smartest idiot I’ve known.” While not one-hundred percent there, Minghao spoke over the chaos. “She better live.” 

“She better.” Seungkwan agreed, whispering it under his breath. 

“Coming through!” San yelled out, rushing in with a body held tightly in his arms. He was covered in blood, maybe his and the person he was carrying, sliding right over. “Gaheyon is hurt bad!” 

He was gentle with her, placing the woman down but blood was everywhere, covering his arms and hands. She was conscious but not aware, not fully coherent. Her clothes were cut and soaked red, sticky. Seungkwan pointed to one of the crew, making sure they didn't let Wonwoo pass out or move and switched his attention to her. 

“Get me more bandages and that bottle of saline!” As quickly as he could, with apologies falling from his lips, Seungkwan pushed her clothes aside, horror streaking his face. He swore with new found energy, rushing the removal to get a better idea of what was happening. 

“San, get back out there, we can handle this.” Seungkwan could feel him hovering, heard his short, ragged breaths, and it was ticking him off. 

“But-” 

“Go!” 

She was covered in wounds, and she was pale and getting cold to the touch. Her head lolled back and forth, whimpers of pain leaving her. The most concerning thing, aside from gunshot wounds littering her body, was a deep, jagged slash to her pelvis. As he tried to soak up the blood, it was evident there was a bullet wound within the cut, around her lower hip and femur. She desperately tried to pull away from the pain inflicted by his actions, but it didn’t stop him. Seungkwan shouted orders, needing more hands to apply pressure to wounds, hoping it would stop some of the bleeding long enough to figure out what to do next. There was a growing pile of thick gauze pads beside her body as he changed them out when the white was covered red.

He didn’t know how long he was there, putting consistent pressure, but her eyes were fluttering and that was the worst fucking sign every. 

“No, no, no, stay with me.” He reached up with one hand, covered in blood, and tapped her cheek gently, needing to keep her as conscious as possible. The bleeding was slowing but she lost a lot in such a short period of time. “You gotta stay awake to kick Mouse’s ass later, come on, you are one of her best friends. She’d kill me before I get a chance to kill her if you pass out. Do we have any fucking blood bags?! Fuck, what is her blood type-” 

“AB! She is AB!” Yubin came tumbling in with Felix under her arm, a hand pressed to his upper chest, blood seeping from between their fingers. “He got hit in the neck- Clavicle!” 

“I’m fine-” His voice was raspy, strained, and while he was hit, he wasn’t losing blood too quickly, which gave Seungkwan hope. 

Someone was getting blood for Gahyeon and Seungkwan had them take over pressure so he could get an IV in, He searched any all all arm veins before he said fuck it and remember the one thing Jeonghan taught if arms failed, get a line in the neck. He was lucky she wasn’t thrashing around and got a decent access, hoping it would be enough to start.

Sona had been in fire fights before, more than she’d like but less than some of the people within the warehouse. 

She was a good shot, not perfect, but good enough to get through most fire fights, enough to keep her alive if the need arose. Rheia had taught her and her group of women well, a mix of combat, weaponry, and medical training. She wanted them prepared, never defenseless, never hopeless. If she made it out alive, she’d have to thank the matriarch for everything she gave her. She wouldn’t be there without her teachings. 

But, part of her wondered what life would have been if she didn’t end up in the wrong place at the wrong time, when she ran into the territory war between Rheia’s group and another one she forgot about. If she stayed as just a make-up artist and hair stylist. For one, she wouldn’t have as much money as she did, that was for sure. She’d never have met Lex, her friends, everyone.

When Rheia said she was retiring, which ended up being a lie, clearly, Sona had joined SVT and enjoyed it, the thrill of the unknown, and she still did. She loved running into danger but also loved the friends she made, the money she made, the semi-freedom it brought. It was enough to say it was all worth it. 

Right? 

Maybe it wasn’t freedom by chance, maybe the illusion of it, but she wasn’t taking anything for granted, not as she shot down Monsta X’s people, protecting and being protected by those she called friends and family since finding herself with them. Her religious nut parents would be clutching their rosaries tighter than the leash they thought they had on her before she was eighteen. 

Jihoon, Mingyu, and Seokmin had finally taken down Shownu, fighting him tooth and nail. Mingyu had been hurt, his arm from what she saw, but he had taken a few hits, a GSW to the same shoulder. Seokmin was fairing better, somehow, even with him being in closer combat. He was light on his feet, bouncing about, but got Shownu down on his knees for Jihoon to send an executing shot to his head. Seokmin went off to find the last of the Monsta X members and their crew from what she saw while Jihoon helped the taller man back to the vault. 

Earlier, she saw Handong, Changbin, and Bora taking down Hyunwon with little difficulty. Shownu was the last to fall of the main group that were here and Sona prayed that Mouse was fending well against the last two if her thoughts were right. All that was left was the MX crew, the crowd thinning with each minute, but it wasn’t easy. Nothing was.

Sona shot down someone going after Lex, Alexis, who was already knee deep in a close combat fight, back turned to the new person, and wouldn’t have had time to fight two on one. Lex was good, strong, fierce, but not the best at more than one person against her at a time. Sona learned that quickly and totally didn’t find her in any fight to watch her back. Totally didn’t, not because of her crush, not at all.

“Thanks!” Lex called over her shoulder, firing a shot into the stomach of the woman she was against. She turned to come back towards Sona, but fear flashed in her eyes, eyes not on her but behind her. “Watch-” 

But it was too late, she felt the first sting of rushing pain before she really heard the shot over the anarchy. It landed to the back of her leg, somewhere around her knee, and she was down, knees on the floor, hands on the ground, a choked sound of agony leaving her. Lex was rushing towards her, gun already firing, but a second hit sent a shock through her system, somewhere in her lower back, exposed due to the vest riding up when she went down. 

Her arms had strength still, trying to hold her up, but whatever strength in her legs seemed to vanish, and a panic set in. 

“I can’t-” Sona tried to move her legs, but she fell to her side, shouting out in pain that rushed up her spine, electric like touching an exposed wire. Her breathing started to pick up, and she once again tried to move her legs but nothing worked. Nothing below her hips responded.

Lex was at her side, eyes frantic as she looked over the other, hands hovering, unsure what to do. “Where are you-” 

“My back- I think- I can’t feel my legs-” The words were being gasped out, the panic raising tears that she refused to shed but failed to hold in. 

“Back, okay-” Lex, as gently as she could, started to feel around for any wound, freezing instantly when Sona tensed up, hand over the entry spot. Something akin to dread was in her expression. “Sona, I need to move you, it’s gonna hurt.” 

Before she had a chance to protest, Lex was lifting her into her arms, and a harrowing scream left her, that same electrical feeling shooting through every nerve in her body. Her legs felt like they weren’t there, numb and limp, useless, and she was shaking. 

“I know, I’m sorry.” Someone was at Lex’s back, a friend, Jiyoon if she remembered correctly, covering Lex as she sprinted for the vault. Every jostle was dizzying, painful, and Sona wrapped her arms around the other’s neck to stay grounded, hyperventilating anxiously. She was struggling to keep her thoughts straight, thinking of the worse case scenarios. 

Over and over, Lex kept apologizing, whispering soft but firm as they got further into the warehouse, passing the line protecting the injured. 

“What do you got?” Jihoon was there now, ushering Seungkwan away from Gahyeon, someone else taking over, looking like he saw a ghost. She was breathing but unconscious.  

“Spinal.” The color drained from Jihoon’s face and he got Lex to place her down, slowly. They were ripping off the vest, and Lex pulled her close, letting Jihoon lift her shirt and see the wound. 

Lex was an affectionate person, always with a purpose, never with ill intent. Sona would call her calming if her mind wasn’t racing to everything that was wrong with the given situation. She continued to flinch and yell in pain with each shift of her body, but she didn’t fight them. She really couldn’t even get away with the inability to use her legs.

“It’s low, not too high, but I can’t see anything. Can’t tell the angle, where it is inside…” Jihoon’s voice was steady but there was worry. When she looked over her shoulder, Jihoon’s hands were red, grabbing a thick bandage and tape. “Hold her still. I’m just going to cover it. She’ll need surgery to get it out.” 

“She can’t feel her legs.” Lex, delicate as possible, placed a hand to the back of Sona’s head and held her firmly to her chest as Jihoon taped the bandage pad to her back. She tried to move away from him, but the other didn’t let her go, holding her in place. “It’s okay, you’re okay, just a little longer. We’ll get you through this.” 

Jihoon finished quickly and they both laid her flat on the ground, needing to minimize any more movement to hopefully prevent further damage. They whispered to each other for a few moments but Sona wasn’t really hearing them, trying to back her emotions to calm herself. 

Sona’s strength over all was thinning out, drifting into nothing more than pain, tears, and a scary unknown she didn’t like. Lex came back into her line of sight, vision tunneled, and sat down beside her.

“I’ll stay and help anyone that comes in.” Lex offered, but her eyes weren’t leaving Sona as Jihoon looked down at them. 

There was a glint in Jihoon’s eyes, and as he quickly cleaned his hands off with a bottle of rubbing alcohol, he was smirking between the two of them. “Alright, I need to get back to Ga-” 

“I said I’m fine.” San argued, hurrying in with Mingi. 

“Oi, numb nuts, your good arm is fucked up, you can’t even lift your gun. You got shot twice in the shoulder.” Mingi was in and out with San quickly, joining the rest to finish the fight. “Don’t let him leave!” 

“I got it.” Jihoon called out, going over, leaving Lex and Sona mostly in their own world. 

She had calmed down enough, still shedding tears but no longer sobbing, and her arms were shaking and she probably looked like a mess. Luckily she didn’t have any make up on. God, she sounded more worried about how she looks in front of Lex than the actual problem. Stupid.

“What if-” Sona let out a shaky breath, balling her fists as she looked at Lex whose eyes were full of concern. “What if I can’t walk again?” 

For a moment, the thought seemed to rattle in Lex’s head, before she was moving to wrap the wound on Sona’s leg tightly. She only knew but she saw the way she moved the limb, barely feeling anything, maybe the pressure. Sona wasn’t used to being so vulnerable, usually durable and unyielding, scared for herself rather than someone else. 

“Then,” She cleared her throat, easy with her movements. “Then I guess I’ll just need to help you, take care of you, right?” 

“That shouldn’t be your responsibility.” Sona moved her eyes to the ceiling, an ache throbbing in her head from the rush of it all. “It shouldn’t be.”

“Well, I kinda can’t have the person I like not being cared for, right?” If Sona could feel her legs, they would have tensed like the rest of her body. “What kinda would that make me?”

She heard a snort from Jihoon as he helped San not too far from them before moving back to Gahyeon. 

“I might be a useless lesbian, but I’m not that useless.” 

“Lex-” 

“I mean, I guess confessing that was probably the worst idea because you could have died. I don’t even know what came over me-” 

“Alexis!” Sona reached out and slapped her arm, grabbing her attention back. “You have the worst fucking timing.” 

“I know! But can you give me a break here? Almost had a heart attack back there! You never cry! Scared the shit out of me.” 

“Love the confession over there, ladies, but Lex, we need hands on the next person coming in.” Jihoon called over, but he was grinning despite the situation.

The clapping was grating on you, but Kihyun didn’t stop until he saw how annoyed it made you. 

“Did it feel good?” Condescension laced his words. “Did it feel good taking his life?” 

“Wasn’t he your friend?” 

“He was, and he was also a pawn.” Kihyun rebuked, cocking his head to the side. “All friends can be friends, but they can be pawns in a game of chess.”

“You’re psychotic.” Your limbs felt cold even covered in multiple layers of clothes. Maybe it was the blood sticking to your skin.

“So I’ve been told, but you aren’t too far off.” He hummed, unmoving. “How does it feel to lose your mind, Mouse? To know you’ve done all of this just for revenge? Does it feel good? Warm the black heart you now have?” 

You sneered at him, having to hold yourself back from just pouncing forward towards him. “I am nothing like you. Once you are dead, I’ll have peace.” 

He laughed, enough to tilt his head back, vile. “Keep telling yourself that. No one ever comes back from this type of pain. You’d have a lot to come clean about too.” 

Your hand twitched, close to the gun Seungcheol wanted you to have. “And I will, I am going to.” 

“Will they trust you again? Genuinely, you’ve lied so much, it wouldn’t be a surprise if they stopped loving you.” 

That hurt, more than you wanted, and the metallic smell of blood was starting to cause a headache.

“That’s all you’ve ever wanted, right? Love, acceptance, and family. You never had it until now. Latched onto it.” Kihyun was just trying to push your buttons, you told yourself that, but the buttons he was probing burned in your chest. He was grinning. “Will they love you, accept you, after you bare all your cards about what you’ve done? I’m sure some will blame you for everything, there is no question about it. Your little family will fall apart right before you, cast you out like the piece of shit you are.” 

“They would never do that.” The argument was weak, just like your waning patience.

“Anything is possible.” It was minuscule shrug of his shoulders, how blasé he was regarding it, that had you close to snapping. 

“Cut the shit, Kihyun. You won’t get to me that easily.” 

Again, he cocked his head to the side, eyeing you like he could see right through you. He probably was. “But I already have. It’s quite easy to get under your skin.”

It was fast, speed you never expected from him to draw a gun and fire twice, but you had just enough time to dodge both adequately so nothing vital was hurt. One bullet grazed your lower abdomen, the opposite side from the stab wound Joker had given you earlier, while the other missed. 

You scrambled to get to the bar, crouching down to grab your own gun, not Cheol’s, under cover. He fired three more shots into the fixture, the side closest to where he thought you were, but you were so glad the bar was solid. 

Why was it always not the vest being hit? The thing felt useless at this point, but you’d keep it on, to hopefully keep your promise to come back alive as could be. 

Your mind drifted for a moment to your friends, family, hoping they were alright, hoping they were winning, needing to tell yourself they were and all you’ve done here was worth it. They could be as injured as they could be, just needed to be alive, like you. Your throat was tight for a moment, quickly wiping the negative thoughts from your head. You needed to stay focused.

“Hiding in unbecoming, Mouse, you should know that.” 

“Suck my dick, asshole." You shouted, taking the chance to pop out of your cover to fire four shots in his direction. One hit him, not that you were truly aiming, more panic response, right in the upper arm, and you were so relieved. He ran for the closest cover he could find, a support pillar, barely wide enough to cover him, shoulders somewhat sticking out. Your ears were ringing as you took cover again, heart in your throat, thanking whatever god was out there for at least one bullet got him.

You both fell quiet, keeping your breathing even to hear any movement. You heard the sound of something scraping, sharp, metallic, and you sighed through your nose. 

“This will take all night if you don’t face me. Feels like a line time for a stand off.” 

“Then it takes all night. I don’t care how long it takes as long as it ends with you dead on the floor.” 

When you felt ready enough, blood pumping quickly through your veins, dampening your hearing, you stood and turned, ready to fire off at least two shots when two knives came flying at you. Your throwing knives that you had thrown at Joker earlier, probably the one that missed, but the other was covered in blood. You jerked to the side, able to only fire once before one knife slices through your cheek and part of your ear, and the other carving space through your left arm. It stuck out from your body, and you dropped to your cover, moving from one side of the bar to the middle, needing to change positions more consistently. It took a lot to stifle the groan of pain. Knowing it was a bad idea, but you pulled it from your arm, biting your tongue hard to stay quiet. Blood was already flowing out quickly, spurting with each harsh heart beat. 

“Give up already.” 

“You give up, haven’t you done enough stupid shit in your life?” You shouted as you moved, inching closer towards the side you could get a clean shot on Kihyun at a side angle. “Your entire group will be dead and you’ll be alone, just go join them in hell already.”

“Only if you join me, Mouse.” 

He was still behind the pillar when you peeked, looking towards the other end of the bar you were at, gun tight in his grip.

“I’ll be going to hell either way.” You shot from a crouch position, getting him in the side twice since he wasn’t expecting you to move. He fired back, five or six, but you were already on the move, not far but enough that he’d have to think. “Nice and toasty on the throne of hell, sounds great, right?”

“I’ll have to admit, I thought fighting you would be easier.” He laughed, but he sounded labored. “You’ve been training.” 

“Glad you noticed. All for your pitiful ass. Thought you’d be better.” 

“I’m honored.” He wheezed and it was music to your ears. “I’ll be honest, I only brought enough bullets for this clip. Thought you’d be dead by now. I shouldn’t have underestimated you, Mouse.”  Every time he said your name, it was so happy, a lilt to his tone that was too sweet. Gross. 

“Don’t care, you’re over cocky and stupid. Put one of your bullets through your own head.” 

“Harsh, Mouse, I thought we were friends.” 

You scoffed, wiping the blood from your face and ear with the back of your hand. That would leave a scar later for sure. More to the growing collection of them. God, your sides hurt. God, your fucking everything hurt. You’d be lucky to limp out of here if the back and forth goes on any longer. You were starting to get a little light headed.

“Friends don’t torture each other, not that I’d even consider you a friend, ever.” 

“Semantics, depending on the relationship, friends can torture each other.” 

“Sicko.” 

If it was a fifteen round clip, not extended or anything, he would be out soon. With his gall, it was possible to be a twelve round clip, but you weren’t able to tell clearly what the gun was outside of a pistol to take a better guess. You counted maybe ten or eleven since the fight began. So he had anywhere from one to five shots max. Enough to hurt, but not enough to get through this if you were smart. 

Taking a deep breath in, feeling the sting in your chest from how harsh your heart was, you moved to the end of the bar with a spurt of energy that reinvigorated you. Hope. 

Kihyun must have heard your shuffling because he was facing the bar when you came out of cover, gun pointed in your direction, and he fired off the rest of his clip, or tried to, only getting two out before the gun jammed. His aim was low, towards your legs, the first hit the vest, force enough to have you gasping, and the second buried itself in your left outer thigh, vision whiting out for a moment at the pain. The gun in your hand went to the ground, slipping from your grip as you fell to a knee, hands going to your thigh. You managed to push the gun far behind you so he’d have to come to you himself if he wanted to do anything. You had no idea if he had any weapons.

You’ve never seen anger in Kihyun’s expression until now, throwing his jammed gun towards the wall with a loud thud that made you flinch. It took everything to stand up, pain shooting up and down your leg, shock electrifying your nerves. 

“Can’t even stay down.” His hand was at his side where you got him earlier, but he was moving towards you quickly, heavy steps loud on the blood-strained dance floor. 

You reached for Seungcheol’s gun, shaky hands struggling with the holster’s securing strap, but Kihyun was faster, injured but furious. He stopped you with a tight hold on your wrist, pulling then throwing you down to the floor. There was a sharp pull in your right shoulder, then an echoing pop in your arm, and incense, sharp pain tore a cry from you. He dropped your arm like it was dead weight, the limb hitting the ground, more pain radiating through you. 

“I’ll send you piece by piece back to fucking Seungcheol.” His voice dropped, void of all emotions, almost demonic, possessed, crazy. “I’ll make him know it hurt. Have him know that I enjoyed every moment of hurting you, Mouse.”

Your head was spinning, pain registering but parts of you were numb. Your vision was mostly hazy, but you couldn’t lose consciousness now, you had a fight to finish. 

He was standing over you, feet on either side of your hips, staring like he only saw one thing; a body to mutilate, a prize to harm. He wasn’t really looking at you, but looking at what he could do to you. His breathing was shallow, blood soaked his clothes, a slight sway to his stance before he started to crouch down. With your mostly uninjured other arm, you slowly moved to grab Seungcheol’s gun again, never letting your eyes leave Kihyun’s as he grabbed your face tightly, nails digging into your skin. 

“I’ve waited for this moment.” He hummed, still demonic, still a far out look in his eyes. “A true way to hurt SVT for how they ruined something so good. Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Joshua couldn’t see the vision, couldn’t see how rich they could have been together with us, how much power we could have, the lives we could have had after all the shit we had gone through together.” 

You quietly unclipped the gun as he spoke, the hold on your face tightening. You’ve bruised later for it, but you didn’t care.

“We could have had it all, Mouse. Could have had the world in our hands.” He leaned down until he was nearly nose to nose with you. His tone went from void to frantic. “Then they had to be scared pieces of shit, but look at them now. No better, no different, yet somehow we are the bad guys. Why are we the bad guys? It makes no sense, Mouse. Is it because they didn’t hurt those unnecessary?  Because they sold the right drugs? Because they helped kids off the street? They are still bad people. They are still just as horrible, and so are you. So vile and damaged just like the rest of us. You are no better. You thought you were, but you weren’t, just like them, peas in a pod with them.” 

“That,” You struggled to breathe for a moment, voice weak but stable. “Is where you are wrong, Kihyun. I never really thought I was better than them. I knew I was a bad person. I knew that when I accepted that I was a part of them.” 

You used this distraction to raise the gun, right to the center of his chest. “The difference was that they never made me feel like that. They were honest about what they were from the start. They didn’t hide. They cared enough to never hide. You and Monsta X were the scared ones, hiding like deranged children. But this ends now.” 

Pressing the barrel of the gun into his chest, you saw the streak of realization hit him before you pulled the trigger. The shot was deafening so close, but the pained gasp that left Kihyun was enough to push him off of you. He continues to rasp out breaths he couldn’t fully take in. You sat up slowly, nerves on fire from the agony coursing through you. He coughed harshly and blood coated the inside of his mouth. He wasn’t speaking but his eyes were full of fire. 

“Monsters are created.” You struggled to your feet, wincing and seething in pain. “You and SVT…you created this monster I am. They trained me to protect myself, while you conditioned me to harm those who hurt me. You hated a monster that looked like you, while SVT loved the one that wasn’t afraid anymore. I’ll live with my actions long after you are dead, but know…I don’t regret it.” 

You raised the silver gun, the light catching the surface almost poetically, beautifully. An extension of everything you’ve done up until this point. A lock and key to a box finally being closed.

“This is for hurting me, torturing me.” The second shot was just as loud as the first, echoing in the empty club. Kihyun yelled out as it hit his stomach purposely. 

“This is for taunting me, thinking I was a pawn in your game.” The third you aimed higher, around his sternum, close to the first shot you got to his chest. He collapsed, laying on the ground nearly unmoving.

“And these are for everyone you’ve hurt that I love and care about.” It was cathartic unloading the entire rest of the clip into him, trying to pull the trigger even when the clip was empty, shooting even after he was lifeless. His body was limp on the floor, eyes glazed over, hollow, dead.

Dead.

Finally dead. 

You don’t know how long you stood there, staring down at his body, just…taking it all in, but you came back to reality when the adrenaline was wearing off and the aching you felt returned in full force. It was blinding, and you had no idea how you were going to leave the building and get anywhere with the blood loss and shoulder dislocation. Hell, you didn’t even know what time it was. Sona’s phone was on the bar somewhere, and you were thankful to remember the whiskey you stashed and a limited first aid kit. 

You picked up any and all weapons you could find, both on the bodies and things tossed aside between fights, placing them on the bar for the time being. You found Sona’s phone on one of the shelves behind the bullet filled bar, movements getting slow, and only pocketed the device for now, moving onto your next step. You used the first aid kit to care for any wound you could with one arm dead weight. The gauze barely did anything, just soaking through quickly, but you tied everything as best as you could. 

You knew there was a microwave in Jihoon’s office that you had the crew leave behind the bar, struggling with one arm to get it on the counter with one arm, but somehow you did it. It was more of a struggle to get Kihyun’s and Joker’s bodies close to the bar fixture and doused them heavily with lighter fluid, needing them to burn fast and hot over the entire rest of the building. Sona had left a bag of metal utensils, aluminum foil, and more to shove into the microwave and the panel. You were going to make two fires, one from the microwave, and another from fucking with the wires of the electrical panel and shorting the system before you rushed out the best you could. 

You had to stop and breathe a lot, dizziness enough to slow you but not fully knocking you down yet. You took a long swig of the whiskey, smooth and flavorful like the clerk said, and shoved it into the now empty bag with the pile of weapons in it. 

You started on the electrical panel first, spending way too much time fucking with the wires before any sparks started and you tossed your sweatshirt into the fire you started, cotton, flammable. It didn’t spread fast at first, but the flames were burning hot, warming your cooling skin, and it was a start thanks to the tampered fire system. No one would notice with no windows in the building, but by the time things started to blare, hopefully all the evidence would be burned to nothing. You remember Sona mentioning the police in SVT’s pocket, which you were going to try and use to the fullest extent if an investigation was going to happen. There was plenty of money to use.

The fire continued to grow as you moved back to the microwave, putting it on the highest setting with a thirty minute timer. You didn’t put it on yet, one last step necessary, but also needing a second to regain your thoughts as things started to spin. 

Keep going. You only had a little left before you could leave, only needing to douse everything in gasoline. Then you were free, then you could go get yourself help. Then you could face everyone. 

The panel fire was already spreading, faster than expected, and you could feel the heat lapping at you, getting closer. You grabbed the container of gas and started pouring it all around the bar and dance floor, seeing the clear, nose burning liquid mix with the pools of blood. Slashing some of it on the walls as the final touch, you tossed the container into the fire that crawled towards the bar. 

You rushed towards the first set of doors after turning on the microwave, hearing the dangerous crackle and sparks that came from heating metal. The fire caught before your eyes, burning hard and fast as you wanted inside, the spinning didn’t stop right away, but the fire continued to build and melt the microwave. The flames from the panel caught on the gasoline, sending the area alight, crawling up the walls, following the path of gasoline, engulfing Kihyun’s and Joker’s bodies. 

You didn’t know why you didn’t leave right away, sweat dropping down your skin, but the flames weren’t that close, or, you told yourself they weren’t. Maybe you were remembering the times here.

The memories, the fun, and now, the ending of an era. The step forward toward the future. Closing a chapter on a book right before the epilogue. 

Before the scene grew worse, you gathered the bag in your good arm and left, hobbling your way out, locking the doors behind you. The cold winter air was welcoming, but a knock to your system, burning your lungs, unsteadiness. The streets were empty in this part of town with the club closed, no one to question why you were covered in cuts, blood, and a kevlar vest strapped to you. The short walk to Sona’s car was exhausting, the event catching up to you all at once, but you need to leave the scene. 

You slid into the driver’s seat with difficulty, heaving yourself in, knowing you’d either need to detail the car well or fucking blow it up and buy Sona another with how much blood was going to cover the leather seats. She deserved it for covering for you. You were worried about what was happening at the warehouse, but you needed to get yourself help, knowing you’d pass out soon if not. 

With one last look at Ruby, the outside unknowing of the chaos you’ve created inside, you said goodbye. Goodbye to the good times, goodbye to the emotions everyone felt finding you there, goodbye to the people who hurt you, even if they didn’t deserve your final send off. 

Setting your mind on the clinic, you pulled out of the parking lot cautiously, needing to take the ride relatively calm to not arouse suspicion or concern. You took a more indirect route, a slightly longer way, but your vision was getting dangerously fuzzy. 

For yours – and anyone's – safety, you pulled into an empty lot, parking and turning the car off to the best you could through the fog, and struggled to use Sona’s phone. You messed up the numbers twice to get into her phone before it unlocked, bringing the phone close to find the phone icon and type in the keypad. You verbalized Jongho’s phone as you typed it, slowly, having to back space only once before it started to ring, turning it on speaker. 

You don’t know how long it rang before Jongho’s voice came through, but you couldn’t hear it, ears ringing, head lolling to the side. You thought you were speaking but you couldn’t tell, feeling consciousness slip from between your fingers.

Tag Lists

All: @smiileflower @ateez-atiny380 @starrias @markslap @celizh04

You and Wonwoo spoke with the two who decided to step out the previous night, truly not wanting an explanation, but you learned the two were a couple that were newly expecting a child and agreed with your comments of needing to find a new normal to care for a growing family. You went out on a limb and got Mingyu involved, asking him to continue to wire their typical pay until new jobs were secured, no matter how long it took. They were shocked by your offer, but you didn’t take no for an answer, thinking it was best. When they left, heads held high and as safe as they could, Mingyu called you cheesy, which earned him a harsh punch to the upper arm. 

When you got to the SVT warehouse in the morning, you found Sona, pulling her into a private space to get her started on taking everything out of Ruby that she could, using your new crew. She hesitated to follow, wanting to argue, but did as she was asked, only mentioning that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get the camera sensors and alarms off before the moving of everything was started. With you already full access to the security, you did as Sona asked, looping the camera feed with no one inside, and turning any alarm notifications off for the time being at Ruby. Wonwoo almost caught you, but you smoothly redirected to have him call Jihoon and Vernon in. 

With the crew members you assigned them, and after a long discussion of what the crew knew in terms of medical training, you and Jihoon agreed they needed a crash course. Him and Vernon jumped on the ‘combat’ training they’d need, how to handle certain injuries swiftly and efficiently to preserve as much life as possible. 

You kept everyone in the clinic updated on what was happening, along with the other temporary leaders. Your mind never stopped thinking of what needed to happen next, having to be reminded twice by mid day to feed yourself. Apparently the coffees you were ordering weren’t enough. Since you were in charge of two groups, Wonwoo and Sona worked together to integrate the communication of both groups together so there was no second guessing who got what information. Mingyu was pleased to tell you that money was sorted and things were being allocated according to your specific wants for account and families. 

“Everything is in order, I think we are ready to move onto the next stage.” Changbin sounded as tired as you felt, even with the abundance of caffeine in your veins. 

“Same here. There is nothing else for us to do so I think it’s time to contact them.” Bora hummed into the phone, something clicking in the background of her end. 

“Everyone in agreement to move onto MX?” You stood at the window of the office, phone pressed to your ear, watching as people moved to and fro, scanning each aspect of the operations. Confirmation came from each of the current leaders and you sighed through your nose. “When should this happen?” 

A few days were thrown out, two days, three, maybe four, and the thought of dragging it out was flipping and twisting your stomach. 

“Give it two.” Yunho spoke up, a silence falling over the call. “Don’t give them more than that. Hell, I’m partial to saying tomorrow night.”

“Tomorrow night.” Handong agreed, really speaking up for the first time since the call started. “They will rush, they won’t be prepared enough for what they want, and given all the numbers, I am hoping we outnumber them enough.” 

“I’ll have Wonwoo coordinate the check point watch, he and Yeosang have been mapping everything out thoroughly. We’ll make contact within the next few hours.” 

After the call, you informed Sona and the team she brought with her to Ruby work a little faster, needing to speed up the ‘clearing out’ timeline. Wonwoo, as if knowing he was needed, walked into the office, face in his phone, muttering something to himself before stopping right in front of you, an inch away from running into you. 

“Oops.” He stepped back but you snickered, shaking your head.

“What’s got your nose deep in your phone?” You easily took the device from his hand but didn’t read the screen, seeing the scrunch on his face, hands now empty. “Hot date?” 

“If you consider spreadsheets for organizing people at check points a hot date, sure. Just finalizing things.” He grabbed the phone back, placing a finger to your forehead and forcing you back a step. “How did the call go?” 

“We need to contact them today, for tomorrow night.” Surprise never crossed his face. “The rest of the leaders agree, it won’t give them enough time to prep, it gives us more of an advantage.” 

“Okay,” There was smoothness in how he straightened, that tired haze in his eyes faded into a most focused stare. Serious. “How do we want to do this?” 

“Contact via web, I can do it, no issues.” You moved back to Cheol’s desk, sliding into the seat. He followed, standing opposite. “Once the message has been confirmed, we can inform everyone else that it has been done. I want our prep to start now, get people moving into positions and have everyone on the same page.” 

“Heard.” He was already typing away as you pulled the cash-bought burner laptop out, knowing you didn’t want anything on the SVT servers again, and Wonwoo raised a brow, fingers hovering over the screen. “When did you get that? We have clean computers.” 

“Don’t worry about it. Let me have my process. Just get me a portable router.” You shooed him off, leaving you in the secure space of the office. 

You breathed in deeply, holding it in your chest for a few seconds, before breathing out, feeling the steady beat of your heart in your chest. 

Everything that has happened, every moment of pain and suffering, has come to this moment. The moment the end began. The moment everyone could be more safe. It felt like a dream – a nightmare – that was finally coming to an end, to wake up with a breath of fresh air, and know you could sleep soundly later. Sunshine after a long, grueling storm. 

Tucked deep in your bag was the burner phone from Jongho; on, charged, and ready for the text you plan to send Kihyun once the meeting was set. It had been a dead weight on your mind, unsure if he’d reach out to taunt you for their explosive surprise, but each check showed nothing came. 

Wonwoo jogged in, handed over the portable router and slid into one of the chairs at the conference table. He said nothing, only using the tablet he brought in with him, and waited. You told him he didn’t have to stay, that you could do it alone, but he shook his head. 

“Family doesn’t do the important stuff alone.” 

And he fell quiet, waiting, patient, as he almost always was with you once your bond grew closer. 

Just as you did in the cafe not long ago, you started your down trek into the dark web, a process known like the back of your hand, an old friend that shied away from the light. Unlike last time, you weren’t nervous – you were ready, angry too. You had the weight of many relying on you on your shoulders, heavy. Each key stroke brought you closer to your goal, each sideways chat, each black market and drug ring you avoided to find the chat you needed. 

Then, after nearly an hour of searching codes and rooms, you found it. The same username from before: Go5Rae. 

[Go5Rae] Welcome back, long time no chat, Rat Catcher.  More demands?

You send the address of your warehouse and a time just before midnight, stopping yourself from adding a middle finger emoji. 

[RatXCatcher] Tomorrow night this ends. Make it happen. Don’t be pussies. [Go5Rae] Fine, we’ll be there~ but, strong words. Your tears were pretty when you cried over your boyfriends, you know? [RatXCatcher] And your blood on the floor will be better.

You closed the chat after that, blood boiling, but you kept composure, needed to for everyone’s sake. Wonwoo was watching, you could feel it before you even glanced back, still quiet. 

“It’s done.” You shut the laptop slowly, calming yourself enough to not throw the device into the closest wall to destroy it. “Please tell everyone.” 

“Already done.” He tapped the tablet a few times and your phone chimed, a message sent group wide, along with to your woman, of the anticipated meeting. 

You message the Sub Leaders chat you had with the others to let them know, getting thumbs up in response. 

“Does anything else need to be done?” You stood from the desk, sliding the laptop off the desk and into your bag. 

“I’ve got everything else organized for now, no one needs help, but you also have Seokmin and I to fall back on.” Adjusting his glasses, he placed the tablet down and stood. “Do you need anything from us?” 

Shaking your head, you grabbed your bag and started toward the office door. “No, I’m going to the other warehouse to see how things are looking, wherever Minghao and Jun are, have them meet me there. Gotta call Yunho too.” 

“Anything I can take off your plate?” It wasn’t forceful, a gentle nudge that he was there, that they were there for you. “You haven’t…really spoken to anyone much outside of the plans and the meeting yesterday.” 

Hand on the doorknob, you turned to him, smiling though you didn’t really have the energy for it. “I can handle it, and I do know you are here for me, all of the guys too. A lot of moving parts that are keeping me from kinda throwing a bomb into the nearest building out of rage. And I did ask for Hao and Jun, didn’t I? I’m relying on them.”

A low rumble of laughter left him, warm and welcoming despite how soft it was. “Yeah sure. Hope Hao psycho analyzes you into a psych ward.”

“Then I’ll see you and everyone else we know there!”

Sitting in your car outside the warehouse, waiting for Minghao, Jun, Wooyoung, and Sona, you brought the burner phone out, dialing the number Kihyun called you from originally. It rang once, twice, and it picked up to the sound of a hum. 

“Good morning, Mouse. What do I owe the second reach out today? Here to call me – what did you say…Pussy again?” 

“I could, might make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.” The words were sharp but calm, earning another hum. “I want to put a bullet between your eyes myself. No one else, you and me, a final match.” 

You heard even breathing, a break for thought, then he spoke. 

“You run a hard bargain. Let me guess, tomorrow night while everyone else ends the true war?” 

“At Ruby. We are ending this where you dropped me like dead meat. Don’t be late.” 

“Well, come prepared.” There was that smirk on his tone, annoying. “We’ll see who leaves Ruby and who is really dead meat, Mouse.” 

You didn’t dignify him with a response, hanging up the phone and slowly bringing it down to your lap. 

Something deep within your chest shivered, some deep forever unresolved part of yourself. It woke up with a bitter start, vibrating through your veins, a steady pulse with your heart reminding you why you were doing senseless and thoughtless things. However, there was something deeper, something primitive and young that you’ve been holding onto for years that finally had- 

You jumped at the tapping at your window, breaking your train of thought thanks to Minghao standing outside your car with Jun and Wooyoung. Easily sliding the phone into your bag, you stepped out, righting any subconscious signs of discontent to move on to the next course of action. 

“Did you not see us or some shit?” Wooyoung clicked his tongue with judgement, but that welcoming grin was on his face. 

“Listen,” You averted Minghao’s gaze, the pointed stare, and started towards the warehouse entrance. “Got a lot on my mind to handle and little time.” 

“You got until tomorrow night.” Jun snickered, sliding up beside you, hands in his pockets. “What did you need us for, boss?” 

Your eye twitched and you gave him an elbow to the arm, which only had him grinning wider and chuckling louder. Pulling the door open, you stepped inside with them, patrols from multiple groups milling around but alert. Those you didn’t recognize still bowed their heads respectfully, and the women within yours gave deeper bows as you passed. 

 “There are catwalks in here, littered around the entire place.” You slowed to a stop, motioning up towards the ceiling. 

“This place is fucking huge.” Wooyoung whistled, impressed, stopping at Jun’s side. He looked around before leaning forward to look your way. “You want long range up there.” 

“As best as we can. There is a good chance that once the fire-fight starts, some will aim to eliminate long range first, but it gives us an advantage.” 

Minghao was close on the opposite side, hands loose at his sides. “We can pick off some the best we can.”

“There is also the office.” You didn’t bother to check if they were following when you moved, going towards the stairs towards the office. “Unlike SVT’s office, these slide open side to side, but…they are also bulletproof.” 

“Snipers on each side that are more covered than the rest.” Jun voiced your thought, a decent majority view of the ground level. 

“And you are the only snipers I really know so I wanted your opinions.” Entering into the office, you tossed your back on the mostly bare desk, plopping down into the office chair. “I have the blue prints, I want to know which entrances they should come in, where long range can be stationed on the catwalks.” 

Wooyoung was already tossing his leather jacket, pulling a chair up to the side of your desk, “Knew you loved me for my brains.” 

For the first time today, you laughed, shaking your head at his ridiculousness. “Sure, whatever gets you through the same, Woo.” 

Minghao, Jun, and Wooyoung mostly spoke through the planning, blueprints spread across the entirety of the now cleared desk. You’d ask questions, clarifying if they were basically speaking in riddles. You marked out different positions they agreed on, enough to slow them, but small enough to not put too many turrets on their backs. Minghao was watching you the entire time though, always, and you ignored it. 

The longest argument was between them trying to figure out who’d be positioned within the two of the three offices. At first, Minghao and Jun tried to pull some seniority rank, being older and all, which only got Wooyoung calling them fucking old. The third office, the one you were in now, would be the ‘main ops’ room so it was better to use the other two, smaller but similar offices for the shots. They were more in the center of the warehouse. You didn’t even try to stop them, sitting back to watch the scene unfold. 

Then they started about how many they’ve stuck down with a sniper, and to your surprise, the numbers were lower than you thought, but still impressive they had that many confirmed shots between them. More even than you expected. 

So, when they continued to argue because no one was budging after thirty minutes, you had them settle it with rock, paper, scissors, like children, because they were acting like it. It’s how Wooyoung and Jun won, and Minghao looked miffed at the opportunity taken from him. 

Wooyoung didn’t hesitate to call Yunho right then and there to tell him the news, which had the phone passed to you to explain why your friend was overly excited for it. He did bring up an important part that you didn’t think about; how would you know which was MX and who was all of yours? 

The easy answer that Jun joked about? Just get some bright spray paint or something bright enough to be noticed by the long range so move onto the next. And sadly, he wasn’t right, so you had to then call Wonwoo to get someone to pick up a fuck ton of neon yellow spray paint cans. Was he confused? Yes, but for some reason he didn’t question why. 

Sona still hadn’t arrived, but she did let you know that moving things from Ruby was harder than expected, but it was coming along. You checked the cameras and they were still looping previous empty days so you weren’t worried. 

Wooyoung and Jun were sent out to find enough strong long range shooters they could rely on within the groups to set them up. Wooyoung was going on and on with him about his favorite sniper rifle, going back and forth on better guns as they left. 

Minghao stayed, even if he was told to join the other two by you, helping you clean up the blue prints and notes. 

“What was that in the car?” His eyes were down on the papers he was stacking, speaking casually. 

“Made a call. Needed a second to think and I guess I zoned out.” 

“Hm.” You hated when he did that, like he already knew the dumb shit you were going to do. Like he could see right through you. “You’re lying.” 

There it was. 

You stopped organizing, standing on the other side of the desk from him, speaking incredulously. “And if I was?” 

He stopped as well, eyes boring into yours. “I’d first say that you don’t need to lie, that you can trust us and me with whatever secret you are keeping, but I know that won’t stop you from lying. It never will. Then I’d tell you that whatever you're lying about is ludicrous, probably will get you killed if you aren’t careful, and unnecessary. You had a burner phone, you’ve been speaking with Sona a lot, and while I trust you with our lives, you don’t trust yourself with your life.” 

You clenched your jaw, not tearing your eyes away from him. 

“I’ve been where you are when I first joined SVT. Cagey, dumb, reckless because life was different, broken from years of abuse, manipulation, and ‘red room’ mentalities.” He placed his hands on the desk, leaning towards you. “Almost broke me, almost broke a lot of us. If you are going to be stupid, you better be smart about being stupid.” 

“I plan to, if it comes to that.” You’d say you already were on the smart side of stupid with at least telling someone. Not that you’d admit that yet. “Go help Jun and Wooyoung. I have other things to get done.” 

Though he was dismissed, Minghao didn’t leave right away, finishing his self-proclaimed task of helping you clean up. 

He stopped at the door before leaving. “Dinner at the clinic, everyone will be there. Six on the dot or someone might kill you first.”

You stepped into Ruby hours later, easier to go to Sona than her to come to you at this point. The last truck of furniture was loaded and just sent off to one of the possible new locations.

It was odd seeing Ruby empty, all the alcohol in the bar gone, tables and chairs removed, art Jihoon had framed and sent away for safe keeping. If it wasn’t nailed down or a fixture, it was gone, leaving the blank space that would soon be painted in some blood. 

“The office was cleared, if it moved, it was taken.” Sona stood off the dance floor, something on her phone. “Jihoon does have insurance on this place, covers a lot, but whatever you plan to do, try to make it look accidental, so an electrical fire, lit cigarette outside burned it down, I don’t know. Dealer’s choice. The fire alarms have been tampered to go off on a long delay so it should burn any evidence enough with no issues. SVT knows many on the police force if things need to be swept under the rug, just make the evidence hard to identify.” 

“Can do, I’ve made enough fires in foster care to know. Burn quick and fast.” Your heels clicked on the dance floor, echoing in the empty space loudly. Slowly, you spun around, taking in the room, remembering the good times you had here, knowing you’d be ruining it tomorrow night. 

From one bag you had, you pulled out a new bottle of very expensive whiskey, one the man at the liquor store recommended, aged almost fifty years. He lost you in the explanation past the ‘it tastes good’ and ‘smooth’. You walked to the bar counter and placed it there, turning the bottle until the label faced out meticulously. From the second bag, a duffel, you started to unload weapons, guns and knives, enough magazines to bring down a small armada. Chest, leg, and waist harnesses to hold everything.  

“I’m leaving my phone with you tomorrow.” Sona was at your side instantly, expression tight. You took a phone number from your pocket, the one to the burner, and slid it over the counter to her. “We can switch phones. I’ll hopefully call you first, but if you don’t hear from me…” 

“I’ll hear from you.” She sounded so sure of it. 

It made the knot in your throat tighten. 

“Sona…if I don’t,” You pulled a manila envelope from your bag, sealed shut, placing it on the bar. “This is a will. This tells you who all the properties go to, all my things too. I had a lawyer sign it so it’s legally binding. Her number is written on it so if anything happens to me, you know who to call. Secondly, I need you to give these out if I don’t make it.” 

Reaching once more into your bag, you grabbed a second envelope, not sealed but shut, thick too. “These are all named, I’d just need you to give these to who the recipients are. There is one labeled SVT, that would need to be read out to all of them.” 

When Minghao had left, you had sat down and wrote a letter for all of the guys, along with one for all of them to hear. You cried while doing it, but it was needed, in case anything was to happen to you. A necessary evil. You had to start a few over since you got tears all over them. There were a few letters for others outside of SVT; Jongho, all of 99 line, Rheia, and Sona. The day prior, you had made an appointment with an estate planning lawyer, one from Minji’s firm, and once you managed to finish them, you met with her to get a will situated, laying out everything.

“You came prepared.” Her voice was strained, tight, holding back emotions. “Really planning to die on us?” 

“No,” You cleared your throat, taking one of her hands shaking at her side. “But I don’t want things left unsaid if it was to happen. Covering bases so no one had to handle it all themselves. Can you promise me you can handle it?” 

Sona was quiet for a moment, hand held tightly in yours, but she nodded in the end, promising you she could do it. She did pull you into a strangling hug, crushing you, before she composed herself, straightening out her suit jacket and slacks. 

“I need to go to the clinic.” You whispered, keeping your emotions in check. “Can you lock up everything here?” 

“Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

The clinic parking lot was packed when you arrived, all cars you’ve come to recognize after being around them so long. You could already hear the commotion when you slipped into the back entrance, the brightness in the voices and laughter that thawed the tension in your body and reminded you who this was all for. 

“Five fifty-nine!” Seungkwan cheered when you stepped in, a plastic cup of something in hand. “Told you she wouldn’t be late.” 

It smelled amazing, unused beds and medical equipment moved aside to accommodate the people, chairs, and folding tables filled with food and drinks. The injured were out of bed but seated in wheelchairs, as comfortable as they could be. Seonghwa looked more alert but still a little dazed, at least he was smiling gently. His eye was still covered with a thick bandage, but Jongho commented to you that it looked good, but a heavy scar would be left behind.  

“This the last hurrah?” You dropped your jacket and bag on one of the beds piled with said items, grinning as Mingyu linked arms with you to pull you further into the mass of bodies. 

“It sure as shit is.” He laughed, bringing you straight to the food, helping you fix a plate even though you said you could do it yourself. 

You said hello to others, getting a side hug from San and Changbin while Chan tossed an arm over your shoulder as you sat by him and Hongjoong. Different conversations were going on, some you could follow, some you didn’t even try to. Everyone was trying to deflect from tomorrow, but there was no alcohol, only sodas and water. Enough food for a good food coma later. 

“We all paid for our crews to get fed well tonight too.” Hongjoong leaned over to you, seeing the look in your eye like it was right to do this. “They are family too.” 

“I didn’t hear about it.” You whispered, surprise behind your eyes. 

He used the fork in his hand to motion towards Wonwoo across the way with Yeosang, Siyeon, and Yunho. “I heard it was Wonwoo’s idea, something about one less thing on your plate to handle.” 

“I’ll need to thank him.” You ate some of your food, “How are you feeling?” 

His shoulders shook in laughter, swallowing down his food. “Back hurts, legs hurt, everything hurts, but at least I’m alive. That is what matters. How are you?” 

“Somehow I felt more stressed in college, but I think that is because I was alone then.” 

The smile that graced Hongjoong’s face was soft, kind, one he doesn’t show often. “Hard to get used to, trust me. Sometimes I still struggle with it.” 

“Coming in!” Wooyoung came up behind Hongjoong, hands on the wheelchair handles and began pushing him away. “Important meeting!”

“With who?!” Hongjoong tried to stop him but it was no use, being wheeled right over to where Yunho, Mingi, and Jongho sat across the room, laughing about something. 

You managed to grab yourself more food, finding a seat beside Seungcheol. He was beaming when you joined him, leg propped up straight in the chair due to the ACL recovery. Much like Hongjoong, he looked better.

“Busy day?” He asked, leaning on the arm rest closest to you. The best he could, he placed a kiss on your cheek, making you smile. “You should try and get some sleep tonight.” 

“Ah yes, sleep, my greatest enemy.” You leaned close, head resting against his arm, he placed a kiss to the top of your head. “Been hard sleeping when you guys aren’t there.” 

“Jeonghan keeps complaining about that.” He added and your gaze moved to your first boyfriend, sitting not too far away with Siyeon, Joshua, and Bora, grins on their faces. He looked tired, bags under his eyes, but less pale, maybe a little healthier. “But once this all ends, we can figure it out, get some proper sleep. I’m thinking of a nice vacation to plan.” 

The thought of a vacation felt distant, unreachable still. You’d give up everything for a chance at peace away from the world you were in currently. How would that even work if you are handling a whole group yourself? 

“Cheol, I need to tell you something.”

“Mingyu told us about Rheia’s offer.”

You sighed, disgruntled, whipping your head to the aforementioned man. “Mingyu, you loud mouth, can’t keep a fucking secret for your life, blabbering bitch!” 

Stunning, the giant tensed up, nearly dropping his plate of food as you yelled at him. He was a deer in headlights, mouth hung open just enough to show he was confused. 

“What did I do?!” He shot back, kicked puppy written all over his face. 

“Telling my secrets before I can!”

It took him a moment to understand why you were mad, shoulders scrunching up towards his ears as a quiet, pouty apology left him. You glared and he stuck his tongue out at you like a petulant child. 

“Don’t be mad at him.” There was a teasing tone in Cheol’s voice, drawing you back to the conversation. “You know he can’t keep a secret for his life.” 

“Doesn’t mean I can’t be annoyed about it.” 

“Forget about it.” Though his forearm was bandaged, he put his arm over your shoulder, getting you as close as he could. “It’ll all work out and we can figure it out.” 

“If I accepted the offer, which, by the way, I can’t really say no, I’m stealing Lex and Sona.” 

The laugh he let out was loud, full bellied, and bright, nose scrunching up, shoulders  shaking, and his eyes crinkling some. “Sona, I can understand, but you might have to fight Jihoon on Lex. That’s his favorite club manager.” 

“I think I can be convincing if he helps me plot their inevitable relationship.” 

“I’d love to see that happen.”

“You and me both, Cheol.”

The night went on later than expected, energy still high even with the events of the next night looming. The pit in your stomach grew larger and deeper the longer everyone tried to act normal, which to be fair, this was your first major fight since joining the mafia. 

You didn’t think you could sleep alone tonight, but you couldn’t stay at the clinic, couldn’t sleep when one of the reasons you were fighting was surrounding you. You approached Seokmin quietly, staying at the edge of the conversation he was in with Chris and Minho, before being dragged into something about the stock market. Your head was spinning with the numbers they were spouting, only sitting there with eyes wide in confusion. They tried to explain things to you, but it was going in one ear and out the other faster than they were talking. 

“She isn’t getting it.” Seokmin didn’t sound disappointed, but he did snicker at you. 

“Bro, I haven’t understood anything since you got me in here.” You downed your water, shaking your head. “You guys are speaking Simlish to me.” 

“One day you might understand.” Chris bantered, leg propped up much like Cheol’s, trying to keep his mood up. 

“Would rather gouge my eyes out with spoons.” Minho laughed at that, agreeing with your statement. “Can I actually steal Seokmin away?” 

Chris and Minho made no argument as you led Seokmin out to the hallway. He was grinning but tired, much like you. 

“What’s up, boss lady?”

You didn’t even try to beat around the bush. “Can you stay over tonight? Don’t think I can sleep alone.” 

He gasped, but his grin never left. “Of course! We could all die tomorrow, of course I will have a sleepover!” 

You laughed, defeated but happy, hitting him in the arm. “I’m serious.” 

“I know you are, which is why I’m cracking jokes, Debbie Downer.” He flicked your forehead but tossed an arm over your shoulder. “You look like you haven’t slept in days and we need all the energy we can for tomorrow.” 

After the agreement, you left not long after with Seokmin, saying your goodbyes with an agreement to meet at your warehouse late tomorrow afternoon to prepare. The injured were moved into beds with help, Jongho staying behind since he wasn’t allowed to fight on both Hongjoong’s and Yunho’s orders with his still healing abdomen. He would be called in when everything was done to help treat those who needed it. Starlight was on standby, you having asked if she could, which she took emergency leave with others on call if more hands were necessary. You’d have to find a way to pay her back fully, maybe finding out how much her student debt was… 

Seokmin showed up to your apartment after running up to grab some clothes and a quick shower before the rest hogged all the bathrooms. He had snacks, even if you weren’t hungry, and plenty of physical affection to give. When he saw how stressed you were, he was pushy to get you into bed, laying close to you in silence until sleep claimed you both.

You insisted on inviting the guys to late breakfast, waking early by instinct, hungry and nervously energized. You went out to your local food store and bought way too much breakfast items and jumped into cooking. Seokmin woke up to the smell of food and coffee, and busied himself at your side to help before running up to wake everyone at a reasonable time. Many of them were in similar states to you, anxious and twitchy, but they were more put together, experienced. No one tried to joke during the meal, no one really spoke, only consuming their fill then helping with the clean up. 

“Guys.” You called their attention quietly, meandering around in the kitchen and living room. “I just want to say that whatever happens tonight, I’m proud to say I was a member of this group and got to know and love all of you. Thank you for being my family.” 

“Man, you can’t just drop that.” Vernon tossed his hands up, scoffing. “Can’t come in here with those emotions and just-” 

“Yeah, rude as hell.” Chan jumped in, pointing your way with no conviction in his tone. “You gonna say more heartfelt shit?” 

“Well, not anymore, dick.” You shot back, the soft feelings you were having gone now. 

“Good.” Jun jumped up and sat on the large kitchen island, kicking his feet. “Because we are gonna kick ass and make it out alive. So save the sister-family talk for after when you say stuff that you love us and thank god we are alive.”

“You sure know how to ruin a nice moment.” You counter, crossing your arms. “Just wanted to get shit off my mind.” 

“Keep it in your mind.” Jihoon rolled his eyes, leaning on the island not far from you. “Don’t need all that yet.” 

“You know, fuck you guys, die.” The grins started to spread on faces, anyone not in the kitchen joining around the island. “I hope you bleed out on the floor and I can’t wait to go to your funeral knowing I could’ve changed that outcome.”

“Are you quoting the ‘would you be there if I was going through something’ video?” Wonwoo snickered. 

You nodded, like it would help your argument. “Yes, leave me and my memes alone. Now, I’ve fed you all, get out and get ready, be ready to leave soon.” 

Though you hated it, there was a chorus of ‘Yes, boss’ that rang through your apartment, watching them all leave to prepare themselves. You stood in your closet for a while, looking over your clothes before settling on the most comfortable option; workout clothes, ones you didn’t care much about, and an older sweatshirt from college. You tossed your hair up in a tight bun, out of your face, and sat on your couch for a few minutes, collecting all your thoughts, anxieties, and fears and trying to compartmentalize them, rationalize some. It helped enough that you didn’t feel like vomiting on the floor, sitting in a puddle of your own fight or flight instincts. 

The rest of the guys arrived in different states, some in more professional outfits, slacks and a dress shirt, or casual as you were. Jun and Minghao were in all black, how you’ve seen them before they left for hits. Seungkwan, Mingyu, and Jihoon, to no one's surprise, were in slacks and white shirts, making you cringe at the thought of blood against the crisp white later. The rest were dressed down in sweats, joggers, and t-shirts, seeming like clothes they didn’t care much about like you. 

You were driving alone, for more reasons than one, while the rest carpooled into the larger cars. The warehouse was already busy when you all arrived, SVT’s and your crews, weapons ready and laid out, bullet proof vests stacked in crates for easy access. Sona was calling orders on your behalf, organizing people and things. You saw Lex with her, and Jihoon did whisper a comment to you that made you stifle a laugh. 

“Mouse.” Wonwoo called out to you, a case in hand, one you didn’t see him with until now. “King asked me to give you something.” 

You stopped walking towards Sona, turning to face him. The rest of the guys stopped as well. Before you could ask what it was, Wonwoo was holding up the case, opening it to you, and you stared down at the silver hand gun that stared back. There was a folded note resting beside it with multiple magazine clips. 

“He said if you get a chance, use this.” 

You took the case from his hands, swallowing thickly as you lifted the note, seeing Seungcheol’s handwriting with your name on the front. You frowned at the gun, never seeing it before, but it smelled like it was freshly cleaned and oiled, shining under the lights. For now, you closed the case, handle tight in your hand, before ordering them to start suiting up even if it wasn’t time. 

You took the steps two at a time to the main office, glad to see it empty, and sinking into the desk chair with the case open on the desk. You picked up the note, folded closed neatly, and opened it. 

Mouse,  I’ve asked Wonwoo to give this to you. This was the first gun I ever received, given to me by Shownu before everything went to hell with them, and I’ve locked it away since I didn’t know what I wanted to do with it. I didn’t want to use it, ever, but something kept telling me that you should use it, to end this all.  I’m leaving it in your hands, as the acting leader to SVT, to determine what to do with it, whether to use it or not. Don’t feel pressured to use it, but once it is all said and done, I’d like for you to dispose of it. I don’t want it anymore. I never wanted it to begin with. This will be a hard fight, we will lose lives, but it is an evil we can’t keep brushing aside.  I love you, Angel.  -Cheol

“Fucking hell.” You lifted the gun from its case, not too heavy, but heavy enough. Enough to know it was quality. The silver reflected everything, but it wasn’t a decorative weapon. Nothing gaudy like you’d see in movies. Just gorgeous craftsmanship and deadly. 

Placing the gun back in its spot, you wanted to not use it, to throw it into the nearest body of water and forget it, but you know you needed to on some subconscious level. A level that told you that it was for Cheol, for the one that had to handle everything, the person injured because of the people he used to call friends, family, before SVT came to be. The person that held this item for the small part that wanted to use it against MX. 

You stepped out of the office to see ATZ and their crew starting to arrive, nothing extra begging added to the inventory. You greeted Yunho when you reached the bottom of the stairs, the flash of uncertainty in his eyes, but he returned the greeting. He and the rest were already packing, weapons strapped to every inch. Passed him, you saw the guys doing the same, and you excused yourself to grab a holster for Cheol’s gun, and strapped simpler things to yourself since you had more at Ruby. Another gun and knives. 

Wonwoo confirmed that every way to and from the warehouse was covered, eyes peeled. At Wooyoung, Jun, and Minghao’s instance for the long range, the crew members lined up, getting a large, bright yellow X spray painted on their backs or strips of neon duck tape, to recognize who was friendly. 

You ordered Sona upstairs, shutting the door behind her, as you slid the silver gun and extra magazines into their places. 

“I still don’t like this.” She voiced, hands at her side. “You should stay here with everyone.” 

“Can’t do that.” You handed her your phone, taking hers in return, shaking your head. “You still have the folders?” 

She made a face. “My trunk.” 

Though reluctant, she did agree to cover for you when you slipped out of the warehouse, handing you the directions of which route to take that only had your crew monitoring. No one would ask questions. They knew better. 

You confirmed that she knew all the plans for after, including if you were there and if you weren’t. How to handle injuries, how to handle bodies, everything. Wonwoo would be there, hopefully, to help, along with the rest of the group’s members. She confirmed every course of action you’ve gone over, and left to check on some things. 

Time seemed to move quickly with SKZ, TXT, and DC arriving in a flurry of bodies. You spoke with the leaders privately, making sure each was on the same page, covering all the needed information. 

After nightfall, a hush fell over the warehouse, the air stilled with strain. Everyone was tense, waiting, restless. Long range was in position, Wooyoung and Jun positioned in the offices, everyone that could get a vest wearing one, yours hidden under your sweatshirt. Time tick tick ticked closer to when Monsta X would arrive. 

You had excused yourself, ‘needing a moment’, when in reality you were leaving, saying a prayer to every god you would think of for the slight betrayal and idiotic decisions. You had traded keys with Sona, moving the paperwork from her trunk into yours, and left with no fanfare or goodbyes, not wanting more guilt on your conscience. 

Ruby was quiet when you arrived, as it should be, and you added the rest of the weapons you stored here on your person. 

Then you waited, standing on the far side of the dance floor, continuing to pray until you heard the inner door of the front entrance open and close. 

Kihyun ambled inside, but he wasn’t alone with Joker a step behind. They stopped on the other end of the dance floor, easily spotting you under the lights. Oddly, you felt calm, not scared or anxious, just…calm.

“Mouse,” A smirk spread on Kihyun’s face, lazily leaning to one side. “Good to see you. Our last minute was quite short, wouldn’t you say? I brought a friend, you remember him, correct?” 

A dark glint was in Joker’s eyes, and you swore his nose was a little crooked from when you broke it. Good. 

“I do, isn’t it unfair for a two on one?” 

“It would be, but I’m not much of a fighter.” Kihyun brushed you off, “Plus, he had some unresolved issues with you breaking his nose. Thought he should get a shot first.” 

“So he wants a fully broken face? Got it.” 

That had Joker twitching with anger, jaw tightening and a vein in the side of his forehead pulsing. You’d need to get through him to get to Kihyun, which…you hoped was easy. You’d have to learn how he fought as you went, but Wonwoo and Mingyu’s training flooded your mind. You could do it. 

“Let’s get this over with.”

Milling about the warehouse was an understatement, trying to make sense of what was to come. As far as he could see, everyone was prepared, in place, and armed to the teeth. He wondered if it was going to be some movie-esque type scene where both sides charged at one another and fought until it was all over. 

Wonwoo knew they were well prepared thanks to all the support from allies. Having everyone there was more than enough to take down Monsta X’s forces, he hoped at the very least. There was no concrete evidence of how many people they had but…it couldn’t be as much as five major groups, right?

“Their convoy is almost here.” Sona came up to his side, arms to the teeth, a subtle shake to her hands as testament of the situation. Nerves. “There are…a lot, trucks, cars…” 

“Trucks?” Jihoon’s eyebrows twitched together, joining the two. “How many people do they fucking have?” 

“I don’t know, but stay vigilant, prepared.” Wonwoo kept his tone steady, calm, hand resting on the gun on his hip. “Where is Mouse?” 

That caught Yunho’s and Changbin’s attention, heads whipping in Wonwoo’s direction. They shared a look, one he didn’t like. 

“I haven’t seen her in, like, thirty-minutes I think?” Yunho couldn’t meet his eyes, fist clenched at his side. 

“She said she needed to step out for a moment, right?” Changbin cleared his throat, a worry to his gaze. 

“I saw her not long ago.” Sona budded in, but there was a waver to her voice. “I’m sure she is around here somewhere, probably within the people, you know she can slip in and out of stuff.” 

Wonwoo wasn’t convinced, a tense feeling in his chest as he pulled his phone out, knowing he needed to track her. Only a few taps did show she was in the general area, somewhere within the warehouse, but a feeling of dread washed through his veins, chilling him down to the bone. 

She wouldn’t, right? Do something dumb in such an important moment? 

But he knew better, she would, and she’d foolishly do something alone. She was smart, even if moments were thoughtless. 

Sona’s quick response was unsettling, worrying. Yunho and Changbin weren’t helping with their obvious doubt. 

He didn’t have time to dwell further at the screeching sound of breaks just outside the warehouse, heard through the open, large bay doors. The air stiffened, heavy and unknown of what was to come. With Mouse nowhere to be found, Wonwoo stepped up on instinct, phone now back in his pocket, all but forgotten. 

Just passed the open bay, he could see the bodies leaving trucks and cars, more than they expected, say more. They had weapons at the ready, moving forward to the warehouse. The crowd split and members of Monsta X stepped forward. Shownu stood at the center with Hyungwon, Minhyuk, and Changkyun at his side, but Kihyun and Jooheon were missing. Red flags were screaming in his mind. 

They stepped into the warehouse smoothly, spreading out before them in a wave of deadly force. Shownu’s and Hyungwon’s faces were neutral, unbothered, while Minhyuk and Changkyun looked smug, like they knew a secret Wonwoo didn’t. 

“Finally putting things to an end.” Minhyuk sounded pleased, a knife out, flipping it in the air. 

Shownu shot him a glare that got him to settle, knife tight in his grip but standing down. Though he didn’t show much in his expression, Wonwoo did see the way his eyes swept over them, the amount of people. If Wonwoo could see them from a top down view, he’d say they were almost on even ground in terms of man power, somehow. 

 Wonwoo knew Shownu as a man of little words from Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Joshua’s stories. He didn’t need to say much to govern things. It’s what Seungcheol feared more than anything, the unsaid things that could be brewing. It was oppressive, and Wonwoo could feel it, the power Cheol rivaled. 

“For groups that almost lost it all, you seem well put together.” When Shownu did speak, it wasn’t with condescension, it was blunt, facts. 

“No thanks to you,” Yunho couldn’t help taking the bait, biting back. “But hurting them doesn’t mean we are weak enough to break.” 

“Debatable.” Minhyuk hummed, tilting his head with a smirk, eyes roaming through people. “But you are really dumb.” 

“Where is your little leader?” Changkyun deadpanned, but there was a subtle uptick in the side of his lips. “Shouldn’t she be leading here?” 

“She is-” Wonwoo started but Minhyuk laughed, murderous. 

“Don’t be a fucking moron. She isn’t here and you know it.” The accusation hung in the space, tempting, baiting. “But, not because she was scared, you could have figured that out.” 

Wonwoo swallowed, spit catching in his throat, but no words could form. 

“I’ll give it to her. She has bigger balls than all of you put together. It’s a pity she is going to die for it.” 

Sona tensed at his side, sucking in a deep breath that was loud in the mostly silence. She knew. 

“She isn’t going to die.” Seokmin stepped up, murder in his gaze, an angry flush to his skin. He was pissed. “But you sure as shit will.” 

The first move came from Monsta X’s side, Changkyun moving sprinting forward which spurred on a rush of everyone else. Wonwoo was already charging when shots rang out, unsure of where or who was being hit. 

Gun in hand, he was firing left and right, trying to get through to the main four until Changkyun was in his face, punching him hard in the stomach. It knocked the wind from him, gasping for air as he grounded himself enough to hit back. The gun he had was kicked from his grip, scattering across the floor away from them. 

A knife glinted in the other’s hand, swiping and slashing at Wonwoo in hopes for a clean hit. He managed to dodge the most fatal of blows with his speed, but a few cuts landed here and there to his abdomen, just below the vest under his shirt. The sting from the cuts were null with the adrenaline rushing through his body. 

He jumped back enough to create space, tugging a longer, serrated knife from its case on his belt, more even ground in the fight. His breath was coming out quickly, ragged already, chest heaving, but he didn’t lose focus. From his peripheral, he saw his friends, brothers, taking down crew members with trained ease, but a few were already hurt, evident by the red seeping through their clothes. 

His gaze focused fully on Changkyun, the other bouncing on his feet like this fight was only the two of them, like no one else was falling around them. 

“You fight like a bitch.” Wonwoo spit out from blood, switching the grip on his knife to something more effective then charging forward once more.

Tag Lists

All: @smiileflower @ateez-atiny380 @starrias @markslap @celizh04

Especially with how big the warehouse was, way too big, way too expensive, and somehow just handed to you with a red bow on top. It reminded you of some packing warehouses for manufacturing. 

Whatever weapons each group had would be moved there first, kept under constant watch by a rotating schedule of different groups’ crews. After that, Monsta X would be contacted through dark web means and given the coordinates to the warehouse. All available ways to it would be monitored and tracked so there were no surprises. 

However, you were leaving out one major detail… 

You weren’t going to be there. You were going to do the one thing you had promised yourself a while back…

You were going to kill Kihyun no matter what it took. By yourself. 

It was insane, most of your hyper-independent, definitely mentally unstable decisions were though, and no one would ever agree with the insistence if you tried to reason with them. 

So you’d do what you’d want but do everything in your power to make sure everyone else was safe. 

The meeting ran late into the night, but everyone was satisfied with the outcome, plans in place and already started with the agreement between you, Yunho, Changbin, Bora, and Handong. TXT was full in with the plans but made no direct agreement to holding any power, seeing their numbers were smaller. The most they agreed was to work hand in hand with SKZ, their people at the larger group’s disposal. 

Sona had this look in her eyes when the meeting ended, motioning towards the door with her head as she stared you down. You excused yourself, stepped out with Sona, the two women that once accompanied Rheia followed just as quickly. Sona spun around when you did, confusion on your face. 

“Uh-” You pointed at both of them casually, pursing your lips. “No.”

“Ma’am-” 

“What are your names?” 

The two looked between one another, the one on the right speaking up first. 

“Mira.” 

“Jiyoon, ma’am.” 

You cringed at that, shaking your head. “Call me Mouse or Mo, not ma’am. Sona and I need to talk, I want you both to see if Wonwoo-” 

They both made faces at the name and you sighed. “Guy with glasses and the bedhead of a fucking nest that sat next to me. See if he needs anything, if not, wait there and we will be back.” 

“We were told to guard-” Mira started and you shook your face. 

“Right now, I don’t need guarding, I need privacy and a moment to wrap my head around shit.” 

Jiyoon seemed ready to object, taking a step forward, but Mira grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. 

“We’ll go see what he needs.” 

The moment both were out of sight, Sona grabbed your wrist and pulled out into the nearest room, an exam room, hands gripping your shoulders tightly. She looked frazzled, eyes wide, shaking you back and forth some.

“Do you understand what just happened?!” She whisper-yelled the words, shaking you more violently. “Please tell me you do!”

Your hands went to her shoulders, shaking her just as much. “Girl, I’m still processing the warehouse!” 

“Rheia is setting you up for a transfer of power of all her stuff.” 

You opened your mouth, taking in a deep breath as the realization hit you, eyes going wide. The warehouse, the access to all her people, everything only for you. “Oh shit.” 

“Yeah. Mouse, she is starting it now to see how you handle everything.” Sona went on. “She tried this before with someone else and it didn’t work out, now she is trying it on you.” 

“No no no no.” You groaned, leaning forward to now hug Sona, a whine leaving your throat. “Why me?” 

“I don’t even know.” She wrapped her arms around you, and you could hear the rapid beat of her heart as she squeezed you close. 

“Sona, I need to be honest with you about something and it can’t leave the two of us for now.” 

She pulled back, a frown on her face. “Of course.” 

“Promise me you won’t tell anyone, promise on something.” 

She held up a pinkie, linking it with yours. “I promise…uh- On my useless lesbian crush on Lex.” 

“We’ll get to that in a second.” You held her pinkie tightly, managing to grin at the nonsense of it. 

You came forward with everything you’ve been hiding, starting with how Kihyun first contacted you, the USB she took you to pick up from the rundown pawn shop too. She was mad, but less so than expected, telling you it was dumb. When you got to the explanation of the computer you bought, how you contacted Kihyun yourself, the meeting, she did call you a fucking moron, but added that she was glad you didn’t go alone and that you had back up. You were honest that there was no further contact yet, and he hadn’t reached out to you since the explosion, but there was a gut feeling that he would. 

She asked you if there was anything else, anything you forgot, and you tensed up, knowing you wanted to be fully honest with your plan about killing Kihyun. 

“I…need you to trust me and be at the warehouse when this all goes down, to help manage the girls.” Was all you managed to come up with first, seeing a deep frown on her face, like the statement was obvious. 

“Mouse, I’ll be there at the warehouse with everyone-” 

“No- Sona…” You shook your head, taking her hands. “I’m not going to be there. I’m going to send the message to Monsta X to have them go to the warehouse but I’m going to call Kihyun myself and I’m going to meet him.” 

The conflict was heavy in her expression, a plethora of emotions crossing her eyes as she took in the information. The grip on your hands tightened, almost like she was afraid to let go. Her gaze went past you for a brief moment before landing back on you. 

“You know you are the dumbest person alive, right?” You knew she wasn’t joking but it did make you laugh, nodding. 

“I’ve been told that a time or two, yeah, but I’m serious.” There was a part of you that felt bad, placing this on her, but someone you trusted needed to know. “I’m not going to be there, I’ll need you to be there to handle things in my place. I’ll make an excuse as to why I’m not there, but I’m doing this, I’ve already decided.” 

“Then I need you to promise me something.” She held out her pinkie as you did, linking yours together. “You promise me you get his ass and live, got it?” 

“I promise to try my best to do that.” You couldn’t give a full promise. Many things could go wrong. “But I do promise to kill him no matter what.” 

Joshua and Chris were released almost first thing the following day, after much instance that they should stay, and brought to the clinic for safe keeping with the continuous monitoring of guards outside. Jongho, the nurse staff, and other workers that helped with the clinic worked despite the observation room being off limits and further guarded by Rheia’s girls even if Sona corrected you that they were technically yours. 

Sammi and Star had left to handle their own business, specifically needing to return to work. You gave them both a decent amount of money from the SVT account, along with the two other doctors, for all they did. 

Jihoon, Soonyoung, and Wonwoo had returned to the SVT warehouse to start the preparations of moving the weapons and ammunition. Similar states of prep work were spread to the other groups, communication open and mostly good. You asked Wonwoo to forward everything that was happening so nothing was missed, gaining full access to every little detail. 

Once Joshua and Chris were settled in the observation room, you let Mira and Jiyoon drive you and Sona to your warehouse, along with a truck of more women now under your command following behind. It felt bigger in person, so much space, too much, and you were really hoping to sell when the time came. 

Mira and Jiyoon showed you to one of the three offices high above the ground, overlooking a portion of the building, where the main security feed cameras were, covering every angle with little blind spot margins. Rheia was thorough in it even if the building had sat empty for so long. There was a much larger, much more secure vault than SVT’s in the building, which had you mind reeling of why something needed to be so secure, but it gave you a place to put the weapons and ammo for the time being. 

Deliveries would be split so things moved in small amounts, routes changed and no specific schedule, the rotating schedule started with your (you didn’t like saying ‘your’) girls then the rest would follow. Bora and Handong were bringing in as many bulletproof vests as they could supply, which was a surprising amount, for as many people that they could cover. Something about them being mostly stab proof thanks to more than just kevlar inside. Medical supplies from ATZ were being stockpiled, more being bought in high quality as a precaution to the fighting to come. 

By the end, there was an agreement between the interim leaders that if all of Monsta X was dead and some of their men still lived, they’d be given a choice; either surrender and join ranks or die. No inbetween, nothing would be tolerated. You should have had a weird feeling in your stomach at the idea, but it felt right, felt necessary to the situation. 

With the building being guarded by yours first, you got to meet more of the women in your ranks, a mix of different women from different backgrounds and reasons for joining. There were many names you couldn’t remember off the bat, but Sona, Mira, and Jiyoon knew many if not all of them, which was a comfort. The three helped you pick those most suited for the guarding position, while the rest would be sent to different groups under your orders to assist in the transfer of supplies. 

You kept everyone updated, a group chat name for the appointed leaders to confirm and communicate as plans moved forward. SVT would move first, sporadic and unpredictable times and movements to seem like nothing important if MX was watching, which was likely. It would be followed by SKZ, ATZ, DC, then TXT, hopefully to be done by the end of the day with how early it still was. 

You did get texts into your Foursome group chat now that new phones were provided, mostly complaints about being stuck in the clinic, but they mostly understood that they were safest there for the time being. Cheol anxiously asked for updates on things, wanting to know all the details, and you gave some information, but not a lot. They needed rest, not mounting chips on their shoulders for being unable to help. Hongjoong and Chris were no better, complaints from Changbin and Yunho sent into the 99line chat that the two were the worst backseat drivers with the situation.

“They are fine, Mo, just bored.” Jongho’s tone was thick with annoyance, basically able to hear his eye roll. “Everyone is fine.”

You stared out the office window to the warehouse floor where the first few vehicles full of weapons and ammo were being accounted for and loaded into the vault, Jihoon standing among them to make sure what was sent was accounted for. 

“Is Minji-” 

“No.” He didn’t let you finish the question, already knowing what you were going to ask. “Still not awake, but there are no other signs of issues. Star is worried so she is bringing in a neurologist that shouldn’t ask questions. We are moving her downstairs though for an fMRI, see how her brain is working when the Neuro gets here.”

You could hear the worry in his tone. “Maybe…it’s like what happened to me.” 

You didn’t have to say it, the fact that your heart stopped and you took days to wake up. 

“That’s the best case.” Someone said something to him awake from the phone, something you couldn’t fully hear. “Neuro is here, I’ll call you later, okay?” 

He hung up after a shared goodbye, a silent prayer leaving your mind in hopes that all would be okay. 

You made your way down to the floor, sliding up beside Jihoon as he barked orders. He was in slacks and a button up, a contrast from your legging and sweatshirt, too tired to deal with the idea of dressing up more, even though you probably should sooner or later. Needed to look the part of a leader one of these days. 

“How’s it going?” 

Jihoon eyed you for a moment before focusing back on the weapons. “This is the first of four convoys. Once they leave, the second moves, so on. This place is huge.” 

“You’re telling me. It’s weird.” 

“Which part? The warehouse or being in charge of two mafia groups?” 

“Fucking both.” You watched with him as the SVT crew carted stuff into the vault. “Question, what are your thoughts on finding a bigger building for Ruby to be moved to?” 

Jihoon jerked back at the question, furrowing his brow. “I’ve talked about it with Mingyu but nothing really came from it. I found two buildings we liked but with everything going on, I haven’t been able to decide which one to go with. Why are you asking me this now?” 

“No reason,” You did have a reason you weren’t going to tell him. “Just need to get my mind off some things, can you send me those two listings when you get a chance?”

He looked at you, gaze full of suspicion, crossing his arms. “The fuck are you planning?” 

“I don’t like that your tone is accusatory.” You mirrored him, crossing your arms. “I’m not planning anything.” 

“I don’t trust you with that statement.” He shouldn’t. “You planning to fucking blow it up or something?” 

“What the hell, no.” You shook your head, taking a step back before raising your hands in surrender. “I’m not, just curious.” 

Before he could send more accusations your way, the first set of trucks left and Jihoon needed to call Wonwoo to send the next. You took a peek inside the vault, spacious and the amount SVT sent barely covering a full percent of it which shocked you.

Jihoon did send the listings of the two buildings over to you with a rude side-eye emoji, which you only sent a heart in reply. 

You sent a text to Rheia, a simple one asking for a one on one somewhere private. You left Sona in charge while you took a car back to the city, needing to freshen up and look more alive than the college student fit you were sporting. 

No reply was sent from the older woman after you took a shower, but Jongho called as you were changing, giving the somewhat good news that Minji at least had normal brain activity, but the neurologist was running more tests. It was a relief but she wasn’t out of the woods yet. 

A restaurant location and a time was sent from Rheia, giving you enough time to stop at the SVT warehouse and the clinic once you finished getting ready. You dressed up more than you would, opting for your nicer suit, the navy one you hadn’t worn since the summer that cost an arm and a leg, which you were glad still fit, and a matching pair of heels Seungkwan bought when you moved apartments. You did your hair and make up, feeling ready to take on the world, even if your clear bandaged covered brand was peeking through the somewhat unbuttoned dress shirt you wore. 

Seokmin was whistling the moment you walked into the warehouse, heels clicking against the floor. “Damn, that’s my wifeeee.” 

“Slow your roll, hot shot.” You flipped him off, spotting Wonwoo on the phone by one of the trucks. “How’s it going here?” 

“One more going in a few.” Seokmin cracked his knuckles. “Then the others start. What are you dressed up for?” 

“I’m meeting with Rheia.” That got his full attention, head tilting to the side. “I need to know what she expects from me, especially after just handing a building to me.”

There was so much more than that, but you didn’t have to say that now. Everything needed to go as you planned. 

“Yeah, I got some questions about that too, but it makes sense.” 

“How? How does any of this make sense?” 

Seokmin tilted his head side to side, lips pressed flat together, thinking. “Well, first of all, you're probably one of the most badass people out there. She is one of the most scary women in the underground because she was Psy’s second basically, she built her own forces, and is getting old. I’m assuming she wants you to take over what she has for your own, like, thing.” 

“Sona said something similar.” 

“Yeah well, Sona has worked with her before. She would know.” 

Both you and Seokmin saw Wonwoo give the okay to send the next road of trucks. You called out orders before Seokmin got a chance. A few tensed as you raised your voice enough to be heard, heads bowing as they rushed passed you to their required jobs. Trucks left quickly while the rest within the warehouse finished with clean up. 

“We’ve already figured out shifts and have the schedules sent out to everyone.” Wonwoo jogged over. “Do you need anything, Mo?” 

“Who manages money for SVT?"

Wonwoo’s head tilted with Seokmin’s. “Hades, but with him out, it falls onto Fenris or Jester.” 

“Are they here?” 

“Fenris is upstairs, why?” 

Your expression twisted, motioning for them to follow as you made your way into the office. As expected, Mingyu was upstairs, looking over files on Seungcheol’s desk, the cogs of the business still needing to be moved even if the main leaders were out. He looked happy to see you, eyes brightening. 

“Whatcha need, boss lady?” 

“We know who in our people have families, relatives they talk to, right?” You stepped over to the desk, seeing him raise a brow.

“Mostly, they believe they work for Pledis but yeah, some have no one but a lot do, probably need to update some information. Why?” 

“With…everything happening, I’d like to set up funds or accounts to put money aside for their families if they are to die or are seriously hurt in this fight. Medical bills, funeral costs, stuff like that if we can.” Mingyu’s eyes went a little wide, but he nodded. “Would that be a problem?” 

“Nope.” A beaming smile spread on his lips, almost seeing you in a new light now. He looked behind you. “Wonu, can you send a message out to everyone to update emergency contacts?” 

“This goes for family, girlfriends, boyfriends, anyone they consider next of kin.” You clarified. “And if anyone has children, I’d like college funds sent up for each of them, even if it’s a small amount to start and grow in high interest accounts.” 

“Easy money.” Mingyu winked, “Did you run this by Cheol by chance?” 

The comment made you smirk. “Hmm, I think I’m in charge for now. I’ll ask for forgiveness rather than permission.” 

That got a laugh out of the three of them. 

“Not that he would say no to you, he’d probably think it’s a great idea anyways.” 

“If you can get on it quickly, please do.” You sighed through your nose but turned towards Wonwoo. “With the next scheduled weapons transport hopefully ready with SKZ and eyes everywhere, is there anything else needed from me before I get my stuff done?”

Wonwoo took a quick scroll through his phone, eyes scanning everything he’s probably catalogued to keep the operations running smoothly. “Not…really, I do think we need to fully tell all our people what’s going on, talk with them.” 

“Set something up for everyone to be here tonight, I’ll talk to them, I’ll have Sona rope in Rheia’s people-” 

“Your people.” Seokmin corrected and you threw him a glare. 

“Shut it.” 

“I’ll message Sona, I’ll have everyone gathered here tonight when everything is settled and I’ll send you the details of when to be back here.”

You gave them all a quick thanks before heading out the office door. Many bowed their heads as you passed, some standing at attention, and you couldn’t say you didn’t like the feeling of power that swelled within you. 

The clinic was closed when you arrived, slipping in the backdoor that Jongho gave you a code to a while ago. The door to the observation room was propped open and you could hear voices fluttering out, things sounded relatively okay, nothing depressing from what you could hear. 

“You know, at least we can get good food since they feel bad for us.” Of course Minho would say that, and his laughter seemed contagious.

You slowed to a stop, standing against the wall beside the door. 

“I was tempted to ask for wagyu or kobe beef.” Hongjoong’s chuckle was quiet but light. “Something really expensive.” 

“Good soup…” That was Seonghwa, and Jongho’s laughter was heard.

“We ordered your favorite.” Jongho hummed, wheels of a chair rolling across the floor. “How’s your head?” 

“Heavy.” 

Joshua spoke next, voice muffled by food probably. “It does suck that we are stuck here.”

“I think you guys are great, but I might lose it if we are all stuck here together for a long time.” Siyeon pipped in, earning a round of laughter from the guys. “Too much testosterone.” 

To save Sieyon from the sausage feast, you finally entered, heels clicking against the floor, and all eyes moved your way. 

Each had food, some mid chew while others finished. Hospital garments were exchanged for lounge clothes, and they looked a lot more comfortable compared to earlier. Joshua and Chris were settled as best as they could, and it seemed things were brought from home to make them more at ease; books, computers, more blankets. 

 Jeonghan let out a loud whistle as you walked in, eyeing you up and down. You did see him peer at the clear bandage that peeked out from behind your shirt. “Got a hot date?” 

You flattened down your suit jacket, strolling over towards the three beds your significant others rested. “I have a meeting then another meeting with Rheia’s girls and all of SVT’s people.” Giving them each a gentle kiss on the cheek, sparing the rest of the PDA, you sat on the edge of Cheol’s bed near his feet, taking in everyone’s appearance. “How are you guys feeling?” 

Some faces shifted to discontent, but none made boisterous complaints. 

“It’s a collective want to go home but they understand that it’s safe here.” Jongho rolled into the center of the room, eyes narrowing as he looked to the rest. “Right?” 

“He is annoying.” Hongjoong pointed to Jongho, glaring at his youngest member. “Can’t let us do shit.” 

“Maybe you should listen to him.” You suggested and the glare was turned your way. “He just wants what’s best for all of you.” 

“Holding us hostage here.” Siyeon complained, head thumping back against the pillow. “I already miss my bed.”

“It’s easier to watch all of you here than in separate locations.” Jongho counter. “Plus, with the extent of all your injuries, we need to medically observe you. Half of you can’t walk, Seonghwa can barely see, and a few can’t use an arm so this is the best place to be.” 

“Don’t gotta rub it in.” Jeonghan grumbled, adjusting how he sat, grimacing silently in pain. 

You counted them off in your head, frowning when you were one short. Minji was not accounted for.

Jongho held your gaze when you raised a brow at him, seeing the short, barely there shake of his head. A question for a private moment. 

You glanced down at your phone, still having some time before needing to meet Rheia, and a hand was placed on your shoulder, light but firm, solid, present. Cheol was looking at you with a tilt of his head. 

“How’s everything going out there?” 

Dropping your head, you sighed, feeling your shoulders drop. “Everything is fine so far, weapons moved, schedules coordinated. For all that matters, phase one is complete. Next…we need to contact them once we get the orders in place for who will be where when the time comes. I think everyone is going to get one decent night's rest before we are at full throttle tomorrow.”

“Are you included in that ‘everyone’ statement?” Joshua peered over and you shrugged.

“Listen, be happy that I’m thinking mostly straight with having too many eyes looking up at me and two groups in my possession.” 

“Now you know how the rest of us feel half the time.” Chris chimed in, working on his laptop. “Shit isn’t easy.” 

“I’m feeling that now.” You sighed, running a hand through your hair before pushing it off your shoulder. “I gotta use my actual brain.” 

“Must be hard.” A lazy smirk spread on Siyeon’s face and you flipped her off, earning a few light chuckles from everyone. 

“Hardy-har, asshole. I’d gladly switch places with you at this point.” 

“Hmm…” She tilted her head side to side before shaking it. “Pass. Injuries and being stuck here might suck, but I don’t envy your position in this shit right now.” 

Chatter went on like that, asking questions of the plan, side eyes occasionally but decent agreement on how things needed to go. It was validating that the plans were mostly good from the leaders standpoint, kinda giving you a slight ego boost. They offered suggestions you noted down in your phone, but Jongho scolded them that they needed to rest their minds too when they got overly excited in helping. By the time you were ready to leave, the liveliness died down and many were getting tired enough to lock in for the night. 

You gave Jeonghan, Seungcheol, and Joshua a small kiss each, which earned grumbles and groans from the rest. You weren’t amused when you sent them looks, saying that you could do a lot worse and Jongho gagged loud enough to send laughter through the room. 

“My sister kissing someone, fucking kill me.” Jongho pretended to choke himself, half falling from his chair at his own antics.

“Do we all get kisses too?” Siyeon made an exaggerated kissing sound in your direction and you raised a brow. 

“Do you need kisses for your injuries, Siyeon?” You pouted, speaking to her like a child. “Will it make you feel better?” 

She cringed, shaking her head. “Not if you fucking talk to me like that, ew.” 

“Exactly, now shut the fuck up.” 

Once your goodbyes were passed, you motioned for Jongho to follow you out with a subtle nod, closing the observation room’s door. 

“Where is she?” The ‘she’ in question was obvious, and Jongho sighed. 

“Minji is downstairs, cold room. Neuro thought it might help, I don’t know, Mo, she was spouting off a lot of shit I didn’t understand much. I’ve been going between here and there, and we basically have a video monitor on her so I can be up here and check on her.” 

Your face twisted, disgruntled, but there wasn’t much you could do. “Can I get down there later?” 

Jongho shrugged, nodding his head. “I guess. There isn’t much we can do at this time, and we haven’t let anyone else down since…it’s a lot.” 

You understood that Siyeon and the others might not be able to handle the state Minji was in, hell you might not, but you wanted to. If she was in a similar state to how you were…just hearing someone talk was nice. Jongho reminded you where the door to the basement area was, not that you needed it, and exactly which room she was in down there. He gave another warning, that she was hooked up to many monitors for various reasons, but he added that she looked…peaceful. 

You arrived at the restaurant Rheia suggested ten minutes before the meeting time, some fancy place with prices you’d never be able to afford if you were still working for the government. Waiting in your car seemed useless, so you waited inside at the hostess stand, purse held tightly in your hand and a tension in your body that ebbed in faster than any other anxiety. No one paid you any mind after letting them know you were waiting for someone, ignored until Rheia swept in from the freezing air outside. 

“Were you waiting long?” She asked, voice sweet like you knew from the time as neighbors, already removing her coat to hand off to one of her guards at her side. “I hope not.” 

“No, no. Not at all.” You waved her off, relaxing a smidge. “Only a few minutes.” 

Her hum wasn’t judgemental, but she eyed you from head to toe, noting the put together outfit for once. “Good, seems you have a lot to discuss.” 

When she stepped to the hostess stand, two reservations under her name, you two and the guards were seated, just a table apart but with them closer to the door than you. 

The waiter moved quickly, handing over menus and rattling off specials, making a comment to bring a bottle of Rheia’s favorite wine. She smiled warmly at him, listening intently before he hurried off to get drinks started. 

“We are waiting for one more person.” She placed her menu down, hands folded over it. “Someone you know.” 

“Huh?” You frowned, back going impossibly straight. “But-” 

“Trust me, dear, you’ll want to meet her.” Rheia smirked, cocky with a glint of something in her eyes. It unsettled you. 

“Sorry for being late-” The voice was familiar enough to have you whipping to see her, for the first time in the flesh. Tessa, your therapist, dressed ready for a business meeting like you.

Your eyes must have been popping out of your head because she and Rheia laughed, so eerily similar to one another in sound. 

“I told you this would happen.” Tessa took the seat adjacent to you with the older woman your opposite, and it clicked as you saw them side by side. 

“Oh my god, you are her daughter.” Hiding your face in your hands, you groaned. “I knew you looked familiar to someone I knew but I couldn’t figure it out.” 

“Tessa takes after her father more than me.” Rheia hummed, reaching off to gently graze her thumb over her daughter’s cheek. You could see parts of her in Tessa, the sharpness of her eyes, the way she holds herself, similar hair and face shape, but the deeper skin tone and overall build was different. “But she is mine.” 

The waiter returned to the wine, greeting Tessa enthusiastically as he poured each of you a glass before disappearing to give you time to figure out your orders. 

“Before you start, this isn’t an intervention and I have no intention of sharing any details from your appointments. That’s confidential.” 

“However, we thought it would be a good idea to be transparent with you, away from the eyes of the others.” Rheia continued, peering down at her menu once more. “There is much to go over.”

She insisted food was ordered first, getting that out of the way so there were no full interruptions that ruined the train of thoughts. The waiter was efficient in getting everything from appetizers to entrees, even when you asked for a single glass of whiskey. 

Much like her mother, Tessa was watching you, but her gaze held more of the psychological analysis, reading every nervous tick and uneven breath. A layer of your mostly crafted exterior shell was peeled back. 

“Would you like to start? Or shall we?” Rheia sipped her wine so casually, head tilted to the side. “Whichever you’d like.” 

“Probably you.” You were thankful for the whiskey, almost down the entire thing in one go, the burn grounding given the situation. “You have me curious if I’m meeting with both of you.” 

“You are probably wondering why I’ve given you the warehouse and the girls, yes?” She hummed at your nod. “It runs more than that. Tessa has-” 

Tessa cut in, placing a hand on her mom’s arm before turning to you fully, some guilt in her eyes. “I want to apologize first before we continue this conversation. While the first intention of my mother giving you my contact was to help you after your…experiences, it did shift into something different, partially.” 

Sucking in a deep breath, you let your gaze slip from them, staring into the deep red of your wine. “You were also using our sessions for vetting me.” 

“And it was unprofessional for me to do. I should have been forthcoming with you about it.” 

The part of you that should feel violated and used…didn’t. You were surprised, rightfully so, but you didn’t feel hurt by their actions. 

“If you are to be mad at anyone, please be mad at me, dear, not Tessa.” 

Your head shifted from side to side before you managed to smile, a snort turning into a faint laugh. “Is that why I was never charged for a session? Her money?” 

Tessa side-eyed her mother before Rheia smirked. “Yes. Especially given the circumstances when you started to come out of such trauma.” 

You picked up your glass and held it out to them, a look of confusion on their faces. “Well, I will say it worked. I’m still here, aren’t I?” 

Rheia clinked her glass with yours, Tessa hesitated only a moment before joining in. 

“But god you both are going to hate me when I start talking.” 

“Always a dangerous girl. But, back to the topic at hand, yes, I was using your sessions with Tessa as a test of how you’d handle running something that was yours. She never told me anything outside of how you were progressing and how she felt about the plan. We wanted to wait longer to see if you were ready, however, after the recent events, we had to speed up our timeline. You carried yourself well at the meetings, so I decided it wasn’t a better time than any to start.”

“Why not give everything to you?” The question was pointed to Tessa but she tensed, a deer in headlights. 

“We agreed long ago that this life, outside of the things she does therapeutically for our type of people, was not for her.” 

“I can handle the bad side of therapy, the self harm and worse, but the guts and gore of that life?” She visibly shivered, “No thank you.” 

“I get it.” You lowered your voice. “Definitely a shock when I saw my first body.”

The waiter came swiftly to drop the appetizers off, asking if anything else was needed before floating away to check on other tables. Food was plated and started to be consumed before Rheia went on. 

“The warehouse was always going to go to the person we decided was the best option. Again, we were waiting for a later time, but as ideas were passed in the meeting, I knew I wasn’t making a bad decision picking you as my successor.” 

“But it’s still a test, right? Sona said you were testing me, that you’ve done something similar before.” 

“Yes, before they were tests, but now, I am serious.” Rheia placed her fork down, staring you down head on. “I want you to take over the entire empire that I’ve created. While you are a member of SVT, there is more potential in you that I’d love to see out in the open. There is money, buildings, businesses, and much more I want you to have, with the caveat that you support Tessa if it is needed, if I can’t.” 

Your fork hovered over some food, stiff from the idea of running your own group, your own people, when running SVT at this time was overwhelming. 

“You have that look that is saying you think it is a bad idea.” Tessa’s comment was light, but weighed heavily on your soul. 

“I think I need to start explaining why I wanted this meeting before you really decide.” You didn’t hesitate to eat a little faster, leg bouncing under the table. “With a promise you say nothing.” 

Tessa snickered under her breath, “I’m under no obligation to speak unless you plan to hurt yourself.” 

“Whatever dumb idea has been brewing since that meeting.” The accusation wasn’t mean or truly accusatory, but knowing. “I might not be your mother but I am a mother, and I’ve seen every ounce of scheming in my years.” 

“Teenage rebellion and years of underground work will do that, mom.” 

“Hm, don’t remind me of all the times you snuck out.” She sent her daughter a glare, but Tessa only rolled her eyes. 

“You had me tailed until I was twenty and in college.” 

“Glad I did, reckless little creature you were.” 

Tessa went onto explain her time in college, just as strict with school, but wild as you were. She smiled wide and carefree that you saw her mother in her there, the welcoming glow you knew from your sessions but more personal now. As you both shared stories, settling the strain the conversation placed on you, the entrees came, knowing the inevitable of your side was coming. You didn’t want to beat around any bushes. 

“The main reason I called this meeting was because I needed a favor to start.” You were half way through eating when you began, pulling your phone from your purse. “I need two buildings, but I can’t use SVT’s money for this. I can pay it back once things settle but I need them as soon as possible.”

You pulled the listings up, both from Jihoon, and handed the device over to Rheia. She scrolled through the listings, a bored look in her eyes as she drank her wine. 

“Two business spaces.” It wasn’t a question, only a curious statement. Puzzle piecing. “Why?” 

“Because my plans for the confrontation with MX are different from the ones we made with everyone.” 

The words hung in the air. Stale, burdensome. Tessa’s eyebrows twitched together, eyes darting between you and her mother but overall staying quiet. The grip on your utensils tightened, nearly enough to turn your knuckles white. 

“We’ve been transparent with you, I believe we deserve full transparency for your plans.” Disappointment laced Rheia’s tone, enough to make both you and Tessa edgy. But she was right. 

“The day we decide to end this all, I plan to go off on my own and confront at least one member of Monsta X. I plan to end him by my hands alone for what he has done.” Your voice was steady, even if your insides were flip-flopping all about. “I plan to end it and burn down my member’s club, Ruby, because it was where they left me, but I don’t want Ruby to end. He doesn’t deserve to end something because of my actions. He wanted to move Ruby prior to everything, a larger space, and these were his options. Once it's done, he has the pick of the building, then I plan to figure out the second one.” 

Rheia placed your phone down, eyes narrowed as she glared across the table towards you. She didn’t speak, barely breathed, only watched on. You sat straighter, righting your shoulders and face, wanting to prove you were serious even if you felt conflicted inside. 

“Tell me why.” You tried not to flinch at her sharp tone.

“They’ve hurt the people I love and care about.” 

“Tell the whole truth, Mouse.” Tessa spoke now, that psychological look from earlier returning. 

Your heart beat wildly in your chest. “MX…They’ve taken things from me that I can’t get back. They’ve taken parts of me that I will never see again, the little innocence I had left, the ability to be carefree and safe without looking over my shoulder every moment of my life. They’ve conditioned me to believe that I was helpless and scared of everything because of what they did. I won’t be scared anymore, especially because they hurt who I cared about. They don’t deserve mercy when they’ve shown none.” 

The sharp look on Rheia’s face shifted, softening enough for a pleased smirk to spread on her lips. She looked proud, like this was the moment she was waiting for. 

“Revenge is a dangerous thing.” She started, returning to her food as if your conversation is sane and normal. “Are you sure you can handle the consequences of those feelings after?” 

“Feelings or not, I think I’m going to be able to heal once they are gone.” You nodded your head towards Tessa, needing to lighten the mood. “Plus, I have a pretty good therapist that can help.” 

Amused, Rheia gave an approving hum, nodding gently. “You’ll get your buildings, and once this war is over, we will settle the transfer of everything. For now, I just need you to live.” 

The rest of dinner went as smooth as it could, normal conversation managing to slip in amongst the business aspect. Rheia had you send over the business listings while Tessa broke tension with more stories, especially when you asked about how she grew up with a mother in the underground world. It was nice, especially when she brought up her dad, who she spoke fondly of, even if he was no longer with them. You knew Rheia had a husband previously, but he passed away before you moved to your first apartment. 

You tried to pay for dinner but both of them scoffed at you, arguing nonsensically as the older woman took her card out. There was no room for argument as she handed the waiter the card, not bothering to even see the check, and Tessa took some cash from her wallet, two hefty hundred dollar bills, and handed them over to her mother. 

“It’s like being the youngest kid that makes money too but she is being babied.” 

Tessa chuckled, gathering her things. “I mean, if mom is giving you her business and mischievous blessings, I’d said we could be sisters in a way.” 

“Hmm, I have enough family and life trauma to last a lifetime, don’t need more family.” 

She faked a gasp, gently placing a hand on your shoulder, an exaggerated sympathetic look on her face. “We can talk about it more in our sessions.”

“You are horrible.” 

“And you will be a horrible influence if we grow closer based on how our sessions have gone.” 

You settled into the driver’s seat of your car, letting the strain in your muscles ease from the anxiety you had going into the dinner. Your mind was still wrapping around the idea that Tessa was Rheia’s daughter, and your therapist, and basically the daughter to a big empire of the mafia that no one was dumb enough to go after. It had your skin crawling at the idea that said empire was going to be yours sometime soon, as long as you lived, which you had no idea how that would go.

Wonwoo had texted you a time for that night, when he was able to get everyone gathered into the SVT warehouse, along with your women, who he coordinated with Sona to get everyone rounded up. 

That left you with a few sparing hours of doing what you placed, but something in your heart tugged you to the clinic as you drove, parking out back. Dinner had gone longer than you expected as conversation had shifted, and it was nearly ten-thirty at night when you got into the clinic. It was quiet inside, hoping that sleep claimed the injured as you stepped closer to the observation room, needing to pass by it to get to the basement door. Before you could glance in, Jongho was popping his head out, eyeing you suspiciously before ushering you off, a mutter that most were finally asleep for some time. 

You made your steps as you hurried down the hall, trying to stay on your toes so your heels weren’t loud on the laminate floors. The basement door wasn’t different from the rest, only unlabeled and menacing of the unknown. Each step down got colder compared to the warmth of upstairs. She was the third room on the left from Jongho’s previous directions, passing the two glass walled operation rooms he mentioned so casually. At the far end of the hall, you found the ‘X-ray/MRI room’, only lit now by a single light. 

Truly it felt like some horror game basement with how dark it was. Why you didn’t switch on some lights, you didn’t know. 

You found Minji laying motionless in the hospital cot, wires of all kinds and colors hooked up to her. She had something on her head, wires trailing out from it, probably attached to some machine to check brainwaves. A clear, yellow colored liquid was in a fresh IV bag hanging over her, saline with vitamins she’d need, and the saddest part was the tube down her nose, and assuming throat down to her stomach, to feed her. Blankets and pillows flanked her to keep the important parts warm. The heart monitor was quiet but beeped enough to know she was still around.

The sight made you sick, and the chill in the air made the shutter your body produce ten times worse. 

A chair and a folded blanket rested beside her bed, untouched and too clean, but you took up the space anyway, wrapping the blanket around yourself. 

“Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” You scooted closer to her, no joy or humor in your tone before taking her hand. She was freezing but bundled up in the places necessary. “You’re really scaring us here, Minji.” 

You were hoping she’d just pop up with her dazzling smile and laugh that you were all worried for nothing.  

“I don’t know if anyone has told you but everyone is okay, alive, and we are still going strong.” You placed your other hand around hers, holding it softly as if she was glass. “Would you believe me if I told you Rheia wants to give me her entire group? It’s fucking wild. I can’t even believe it when she told me today, but…” 

Leaning forward, elbows resting on the bed, you placed your forehead against your hand and hers. “But I need to live through this plan. This dumb, suicidal, most insane thing I’ve ever thought of plan. When you wake up, you will be so mad at me, and I think everyone will be when they find out, but I don’t care. I need to stop Kihyun myself at least. He is my kill, for ruining parts of me, for hurting and tormenting me for so long, for hurting Jeonghan, Joshua, Cheol, Jongho, Chris, Minho, Soobin, Yeonjun, Siyeon, and you.” 

“The rest won’t understand, I don’t know how to explain it, but they’d stop me at every turn if I told them. You’re probably so disappointed in me right now, so fucking disappointed.” You could feel the tears threatening to fall from your eyes, but you willed them back, shaking the feeling. You couldn’t get emotional now. “But it is a necessary evil. And God, Jihoon is going to be so pissed when he learns I got a new building for Ruby to move everything too. There is so much to do and an unknown amount of time.” 

The heart monitor beat rhythmic and even, no change you could hear, and Minji didn’t stir. Her chest rose and fell, calm, collected, unlike the chaotic swirl of emotions that raged in yours. 

“Maybe…when you wake up…we can talk about a few things? Give me some tips on how to run a whole ass mafia group, okay?” You gently moved her hand, linking your pinky in hers. “Promise, okay? We’ll talk about it, awake, alive, and healthy.” 

You didn’t move after you finished speaking, only soaking in the relative silence, coming to terms with everything. You didn’t have a full moment to yourself until now, just to accept, understand, and move forward. You’ve been running on little sleep and spite, now you had a purpose for what you wanted to do, even if it was careless and troubling. A purpose to end the fighting even if it meant hurting yourself in the end to get it. You knew you wouldn’t leave the fight with Kihyun unscathed, but you sure as shit were going to make it worth it. 

“You’ve been down here for an hour.” Your head shot up at Jongho’s voice, so focused on your thoughts you didn’t hear him come in. “You alright?” 

Placing Minji’s hand down carefully, you nodded, sighing out through your nose. “I’m using this time to hide from the world until I need to be a leader.” 

“Rough.” His comment was quiet, moving over to the monitors to make sure things were alright, even checking her IV. He barely glanced your way as he checked everything. “I’m not going to comment on the look you’ve had in your eyes, Mo. I’m not going to stop you or scold you, but I just need you to make it out alive, even if it’s barely. Alive enough that we can fix you.” 

“Three boyfriends and only one annoying little brother can read me like a book.” You moved to stand, reaching over to brush some hair from Minji’s face.

“You haven’t changed much since you were a teenager. You are still dumb and violently independent.” Now, Jongho turned to you, a drained, almost pleading look in his eyes, even if his expression was flat. “You have a family behind for support, lean on them.” 

He didn’t flinch when you cupped his cheek with one hand, the ghost of a smile on your lips. “I know, and I’m grateful, but sometimes I can’t help myself, Jongho. I plan on living, even if it hurts like hell.” 

“If they aren’t your first call, call me.” He held up his pinky and you gut twisted. “Promise you’ll call me if you don’t call them.” 

“You’re killing me here, kid.” You laughed, locking your pinky with his, using the other hand to ruffle his hair. “I promise, but it makes you an accomplice to all my mess.” 

“Rather an accomplice than a bystander.” 

Jongho walked you all the way to your car, both peering into the observation room to see the multiple sleeping forms. It lightened your heart some, enough to keep going. He made you promise a second time before letting your car door close, more serious than before. He said he couldn’t be the one to tell everyone that you were dead, if that happened, didn’t need that on his conscience. 

Many of both of your crews were piled in the warehouse when you arrived, a clear contrast to who was once Rheia’s and who was SVT from the line down the middle they formed themselves. Your women stood more uniform, put together, deadly. SVT’s were more relaxed, but still on alert, eyes on a swivel, and tense. Sona, Wonwoo, and Seokmin were at your side as you stepped in, having waited for your arrival. 

A hush fell over everyone, heads bowing respectfully from both crews. Up on the office walkway, the rest of SVT stood, dressed formally much like yourself, stone faced and waiting. Wonwoo informed you that Mingyu was still working on sending the money aside, but he wasn’t worried, knowing money would be there to allocate when it mattered most. 

The steps up to the overhang was mentally too long, weighing, but you kept your head high and downed the nausea in your stomach. 

“Almost everyone is accounted for.” Sona hummed, eyeing the crowd down below, “Waiting on a few more that will check in once they’ve arrived.” 

“Was your meeting with Rheia good?” Seokmin popped his head into your peripheral vision once you stepped into the office and you gave a firm nod. 

“Fine, stuff we can discuss after everyone gets it and I get this speech over with.” 

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Jun snickered, falling unceremoniously onto the couch for now. “Nervous?” 

Understatement. 

“Kinda. A lot on my mind and I don’t want to say the wrong things.” 

Seungkwan strolled past you, hands in his slack pockets, shrugging. “Eh, just put on that angry, bitch mask you’ve talked to us in before and you should be fine.” 

“Thank you for your confidence in me, Kwan.” The sarcasm had him laughing, holding his hands nonchalantly. 

“Anything for you, Boss.” 

You cringed, shivering. “No.” 

“Ohhh yeah, Boss.” Chan joined in, giving you a firm pat on the back as he passed, leaning against the arm of the couch Jun rested on. “You are in charge so…”

“Ick, the biggest ick of my life.” It was nice hearing the laughter that followed, easy and carefree even if it was just a fleeting second. “I’d rather you call me my actual name than Boss.” 

Someone said it, quietly, you thought it was Soonyoung, and you jerked back, fake gagging. “Nah, I retract my statement, the list of hating names goes my name, then Boss, then any weird nickname. This isn’t giving you any permission to call me another nickname.” 

They tried to come up with a few, Seokmin even brought up Honey again, but they all agreed nothing felt right. It all felt too weird having called you Mouse for so long. You weren’t used to your actual name anymore, and everyone settled on Mo for any following nickname, thankfully. 

Wonwoo cleared his throat as conversation settled and all eyes fell on him, looking down at his tablet. “Everyone is here and accounted for.” 

“Oof, thought you’d have more time.” Vernon patted your shoulder, moving towards the door with the rest. 

“Take a second before you head out there.” Minghao whispered as he headed out the door with the rest.

They lined the side of the walkway, leaving a gap for you to stand in the middle. None of them looked back through the window, letting you collect yourself. You breathed in deeply, fixing the front of your shirt and jacket, smoothing out your pants some, and you spotted the decanter you stole whiskey from weeks ago. Liquid courage. 

You quickly poured yourself a glass and downed it, the burn much like earlier at dinner welcoming and grounding. You'd probably regret it later, but you didn’t now. 

Stepping out of the office towards the railing, the gravity of all the eyes on your was immense, if not suffocating. You couldn’t see your family’s eyes, but you saw the crew members’ eyes, many worried, most hopeful. Even from two different groups, they shared looks, small glances that were loaded with unanswered questions. 

You straightened your back, placing your hands wide on the railing before you, a slow even breath going in and out. You’d be able to hear a pin drop in the silence. 

“Thank you all for gathering here tonight.” Your voice was firm, strong, and loud enough that had shoulders squaring and backs straight as a pole. “I don’t want to keep you here all night so I’ll be as quick as I can, and you probably have many questions that I’ll try to answer.”

“You all know that our leaders have been hurt badly. It has rattled us, caused confusion and uncertainty, and I’m sorry we haven’t been able to keep you all as updated as we could. I want to start by saying that King, Hades, and Loki are alright, they are being taken care of and safe. Some of you might already know that, but I wanted to put the reality out there. They are in the best hands. SVT’s leaders, along with our ally’s leaders were caught in an explosion that we are ninety-nine percent sure was caused by Monsta X.” That caused some muttering that you couldn’t fully make out. 

“The same night the explosion happened, it was decided by a unanimous vote by the members of SVT that I would be in charge. I know many of you don’t know me because I am new to SVT. I know some of you might hesitate to follow my orders, but know that everything I decide, I’m not deciding alone.” You motioned to everyone beside you. “Trust me when I say that we talk way too much to even consider any order a solo decision. That being said, a war is coming, a fight that will lose lives, that will cause pain, and I can’t guarantee any of your safety. I will not stand up here and lie that you will be safe moving forward. I can’t predict what will happen, so I am giving you a few options.” 

You did see Wonwoo’s confused expression out of the corner of your eye but you continued. “One, you can stay here, follow orders, and go into an unknown fight with as much protection as we can offer. Two, you stay with SVT, but you take on another role within the group. I will not fault you for picking self preservation. You will not be penalized for it, especially if you have a family. I will personally make sure of it. Third, you leave SVT permanently. You leave and either find somewhere else or, and I hope, get on a better path of life, outside of crime. I will give you some time to decide, however, the decision needs to be made within an hour. I want answers by the time I step back out of this office.” 

With as much grace as you could, you turned and walked back into the office, the members and Sona following close behind. You didn’t stop walking until you were at Cheol’s desk and sank into his seat. Chan entered last, the door clicking shut before him as others took seats and Wonwoo propped up a timer on his tablet with an hour countdown. 

“I want to say that you handled it better than I expected.” Jihoon’s praise hit hard and you sank further down into the seat, eyes wide as you glanced at each of them, their gazes on you. 

“I’ve taken one speech class in college and nothing prepared me for that.” You sounded hoarse, like it was too much talking all at once to everyone. “And I have to do it again, fuck me!” 

“Gotta send the security footage for them.” Mingyu was not quiet when he tried to whisper to Wonwoo. The glass-faced mother fucker smirked and nodded. 

“Would this be a bad time to tell you what Rheia said to me?” Sitting up, you thunked your head on the mostly cleared desk.

“Probably but go ahead.” 

So you started, speaking fast, telling them of the fact she wants you to take over her empire, her entire everything, leaving out all the bits about the business building, Kihyun killing, and more. Sona didn’t look surprised, but everyone else did. They were in similar states of shock. When you brought up how your therapist was testing you, and that she was Rheia’s daughter, Chan gapped. 

“I knew she looked familiar!” Chan exclaimed, groaning as he pressed his hands to his face. “I should have put two and two together.” 

“Trust me, I didn’t until I saw them side by side.” 

“It’s the eyes.” 

“Definitely the eyes.” 

“So wait…this means you are gonna have your own crew.” Vernon frowned, still taking in all the information. “Have you told the guys?” 

“I…haven’t got there yet.” You admitted guiltily, shaking your head. “I was going to tell them tomorrow because…I’m going to do it, and in reality, I don’t have much choice.” 

Sona’s gaze caught yours at the choice of your words and you looked away, rolling your shoulders back. The guilt only grew but you shoved it down for a later time.

“That is a lot of responsibility.” Minghao spoke up, elbow resting on the table with his head in his hand. “Can you handle it?” 

“I might need to steal someone for a second in command.” Your eyes did go back to Sona and she now looked away, looking at the tablet on the table before her. “But nothing is decided yet. I have time, even if it isn’t a lot.” 

The timer chimed violently through the office, the hour up quicker than any of you expected. Unlike before, you weren’t as nervous, only dreading the idea that many of either crew might step back and not fight in this battle to come. No one rose from their seat until you stood, rolling your shoulders and neck to ease the tightness. 

They filed out before you, taking their previous spots before you emerged from the office, a slight breath of relief when you saw almost all stood together in the same places previously. A hand was raised by someone towards the front of SVT’s crew, a stern look but worry littered her expression. 

Nodding you head down to her, she froze for a moment, hand lowering slowly like she never expected to actually be given a chance to speak. 

“Ma’am, for the past hour, many of us have spoken about what we’d all prefer for the future and we’ve come up with what we believe is a reasonable solution to the situation for option two for those wishing to take a step back.” 

You folded your hands on the railing, nodding at her a second time to continue. 

She shuttered but righted herself instantly. “Those who do not wish to be on the front line, choosing option two of your offer, have offered to be the reinforcements, the second line defence if you will, or medical removal crew for the injured if we can pull them out.” She motioned towards a small group of people, not even a full fifty if you had to guess. “They…have asked me to inform you that they have families, and they are the main source of income for their families, them being unable to work for whatever reason places their entire next of-” 

“I understand.” You didn’t need to go on, didn’t need an explanation when you didn’t ask for one and chose to not let them get penalized for their decision. “Has anyone decided to leave?” 

“Only two people.” 

“And why were you chosen to speak for them?” 

“I-” Her cheeks flushed, down casting her gaze. “I lost a really shitty hand of rock, paper, scissors since everyone is a little intimidated by you.” 

You had to clamp your mouth shut to not let out a laugh, clearing your throat to let the feeling pass. You did hear a snort from someone beside you.

“The two who have chosen to leave, please speak to Archivist and I after this.” You looked towards Jihoon and Vernon, a brow raised when he met your eyes. “The group that is going to be the second line of defense, I’m placing you under Apollo’s and Watcher’s command. You’ll get orders from them in terms of your roles going forward. Everyone else, rest, prepare yourself, and wait for full orders.”

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