just another mcu sideblog :/

Peter Parker is a protective mother fucker and he always have been. Peter is a lot like Steve Rogers where when he was a kid he was scrawny, and wimpy, but by dear god he was a spit fire. He didn’t like people hurting others and he literally would rather get into a physical fist fight, aggravate his asthma, and get the hurt, than sit around and not do anything when someone else gets hurt. And it didn’t help that Ben 100% supported Peter getting in fights if it meant protecting others, and will get him ice cream and kiss his bruises and cheer him up after a fight. So Peter is like six, snot nosed with glasses and a very protective streak.

Peter only gets even more protective as he gets older. He’s very fickely about what he’s protective over. Like?? He’s very, extremly, protective over Flash (who’s still his friend at this point) and if someone makes a joke at Flash’s expense he goes absolutely feral. He’s not a mean person, but he’s not above fighting someone over words or forcing someone to apologize. But when seomeone makes a joke at like.. Harrys expense he’ll frown but he won’t fight because he knows Harry doesn’t mind most jokes unless it’s about a very certain type of subbject and when it is he goes just as feral. He’s also 100% learned by this time not to throw the first punch, and to wait until the other person punches first, so he gets very good at finding just the right joke to push someone a little closer to throwing the first punch.

The spiderbite changes things because of course it does. Things that didn’t bother him before starts bothering him now. Uncle Ben isnt here anymore to tell off people who flirt with Aunt May, so Peter finds himself increasingly agitated and angry when people flirt with her and all he wants to do is shield her and protect her from unwanted advances because he knows she’ll never truly move on from Ben. He starts to think of things as his and not his and he has a small amount of people that’s just his. He has to protect the city, but most importantly he has to protect his, and he needs to step up and be a hero and be good enough. Flash and him are no longer friends, but he finds himself biting back something cruel and mean and heartless when people make jabs at him. When people jeer at Ned, he struggles not to blow up because Neds one of his friends and he has to protect him. He struggles with these feelings with everyone in his life because every part of him wants to protect the people he cares about.

He’s actually very very protective over the adults in his life. It’s two parts trauma, one part how the spiderbite alters his thinking (even more headcannons on that, hit me up in dm’s for those) and it’s really hard for him to deal with. Like Tony makes it a point to remind Peter that he’s a kid and he doesn’t have to be some great protector, and Pepper doesn’t think she needs protection from this 16 ish year old kid, and Rhodeys a literal soldier, and his Aunt is finally starting to move on, and everyone doesn’t think they need his protection and that’s hard for him to grapple with because like... he wants to protect him. He already struggles with how he didn’t protect Ben, and it’s one of those things that he knows that no amount of therapy will ever alleviate. So he finds his small ways to protect them. He makes sure that Tony always gets some sort of food, and he has at least three separate twitter accounts he just uses to defend him. He uses those same accounts to verbally smack down people who make inappropriate comments about pepper and remind them that she’s a CEO of the most successful company in the world and they best show some respect. (He always does those on the official Spider-Man account.) He makes sure rhodey is remembered as an important avenger and an important person. He is over protective to a T when it comes to his aunt and he shovel talks anyone and everyone.

Peter’s a protector. He needs to protect. He loves protecting because that’s part of who he is. And a part of him hates that because he doesn’t want that but he also loves being protector. He loves being strong enough to protect and to care for people and he loves the fact that it’s something they trust him with. He has so little control over everything in his life but he can control who he protects and why he protects and what he does to protect.

When Harley comes into his life things are a bit different- or at least they feel different. He wants to protect Harley because Harley’s his friend and that means he’s someone that Peter cares about and needs to protect. But there’s something about the way that Harley smiles at him and the way they tangle up together and the way Harley kisses him that makes him even more protective. Their most common fight is about Harley joining the Young Avengers as iron lad because Peter cant handle the idea that he wouldn’t be able to protect Harley in a fight. He can’t deal with that. He can’t deal with the idea that he won’t be able to protect Harley. And it’s something that he struggles with so so much and it’s hard for them. It almsot causes them to break up me because he just... doesn’t know how to get over his irrational fear of not protecting Harley because Harley is this thing in his life that feels like it will never change. He just- he loves Harley Keener and is so so terrified of him going somewhere that Peter can’t follow and protect.

This one is for @thirstinart (◕‿◕✿) this is what you get for telling me to “just have fun with it”

1) The canonical MCU evidence.

Lets start with what we know about Flash first. Flash is a rich boy, he gets fancy cars (as seen in Spider-Man: Homecoming) and generally all around is snooty and privillaged- however we see on multiple occasions that the people around him put him down and treat him like trash as well, especially in the context of acadeca where he is put down directly by all of his peers. 

This directly parallels Tony Starks childhood in the MCU. He’s a rich boy, he has the world at his fingertips, and everyone around him thinks that he’s privillaged and arrogant. Its only when he gains a close friend that he doesn’t get put down for these qualities and is instead praised for his brians, creativity, and problem solving. This means that Flash is what could have happened to Tony if Tony had never met Rhodey, his first and only close friend for a long time. 

“But Peachy!” I hear you shout, “What about Tonys life with Jarvis and his abusive father and his neglectful mother!” 

Well don’t worry, my friend because the mcu has connonly shown us that they grew up in extremly simmilar home enivornments. How you ask? 

The airprot scene: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxkE0wFroCc

In this scene what appears as a throw away gag fills us in on a lot about Flash’s character. Namely that:

A) Flash Thompson primary care giver is a butler, someone who works for his family instead of his family.  B) He has hope that his mother will come, but she doesnt, most likely because she is neglectful and doesn’t care for Flash. He still holds hope though, and asks after her because much like Maria with Tony, she was once a good mother.  C) He doesn’t even assume that his dad would come. He refers to his mom, but not his dad. What this tells us is that Flash clearly doesn’t think his dad would ever even care if his life was in danger.  Flash Thompson’s life in the MCU is scarily similar too Tony Starks. 2) The parallel between the characters on a characteristic level. 

Lets look at how their peers view them- starting with Flash.  Everyone, fandom in tow, hates Flash. They think he’s a cruel bully. They think he flaunts his wealth. They think he’s an arrogant bastard that doesnt actually know anything and is just pretending to be smart. His peers don’t seem to understand anything about him, noted by the fact that even surronded by people he’s still alone. 

Now Tony’s peers very. When he’s with his friends- his true friends- they see him for who he is, a kind generous man who can be a bit of an ass because of his lot in life. But The avengers- the people who claim to be his friends and family- dont see him as that at all. They see him as a rich man, who flaunts his intelligence and power, and gets away with all sort of evil things (Like Ultron.) They don’t know anything about him on a characteristic level noted by the fact that the one time he does reach out hes brushed off by Bruce, and every other time he’s around them, he wears a mask, essentially alone. 

Whats interesting here is that they both essentially have the same exact coping mechanism applied in different ways; Lashing Out. 

Tony Stark lashes out at himself- he wont sleep for days, or eat, and he’s constantly putting himself down around others. 

Flash Thompson lashes out at others- he bullies peter, or makes fun of peter, okay so he doesn’t lash out at others he lashes out at Peter. 

3) Comics. 

So this ones a major stretch. 

In the comic, we get to see that Flash’s dad was an alchohlic abuser. Who else was an alchoholic abuser? Howard Stark. Both of their childhoods were hindered by fear of their father and they delt with it in different ways. 

beyond that, what I took away from some of the older agent venom comics was this: agent venom, Flash, really does try to absolve himself of how he bullied and harassed his hero (peter/spider-man) in his youth by becoming a hero and making sure he can save others and a bunch of other stuff. 

wheres as the iron man comics this is presented:  Tony Stark, Iron Man, really does try to absolve himself of how his company's weapons ruined lives of millions and made him a merchant of death by becoming a hero so that he can save others and a bunch of shit

Probably the weakest point to end on but uhh this was primarily abt the MCU not the comics, so yeah. 

Theme and Prompt List Announcement!!

Good morning/afternoon everybody!! Here's the announcement you've been waiting for, the theme and prompt list for parkner week 2020!! So let's get right into it, shall we? :))

This year's theme for parkner week is John Mulaney!!! Specifically, quotes from his comedy shows! Yay!!

And, the main event, here is this year's prompt list!!!

Day 1: “2029, that’s not a real year” / time travel / future au

Day 2: “And i said ‘no,’ you know, like a liar” / identity shenanigans / iron lad

Day 3: “I am very small and I have no money.” / college au / no-powers au

Day 4: “I will pepper in the fact that I am gay” / coming out / first date

Day 5: “He ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving” / irondad / parents au

Day 6: "We’ve all made a “Happy Birthday” sign" / coming of age / getting older

Day 7: “13-year-olds are the meanest people in the world” / middle school / jealousy

Day 8: “Get some rest tall child” / cuddling / movie nights

Day 9: "I’ll keep all my emotions right here, And then one day, I’ll die.” / hanahaki / pining

Day 10: “We’re gonna frame you for murder” / canon-compliant / villain au

And this runs from August 1st to August 10th!

yes, here is a baby oarfish 

MA! THERE’S A WEIRD FUCKING FISH!

Not much is known about Oarfish. Their maximum length is debatable, though there are reports of specimen up to 56 ft long. They live at great depths, and are rarely observed alive. Here’s a relatively small one:

Slightly larger one:

aaaaand, little bigger:

Yeah. these children get long.  hold on a mo’, i might have a better photo

yeah. there we go. a few hundred lbs of Oarfish. like i said, length-variable. that one’s only about 28 feet though. so like, imagine that but double. 

look how excited everyone is. well, everyone but the fish. oh, fun fact! they can self-amputate up to 3/4th of their body. lizard style. 

Historically, Oarfish have been described as sea serpents, and are probably responsible for a fair portion of myths. In Japanese folklore, their appearance portends earthquakes. Though rarely seen, Oarfish live in every ocean. All around the world. Everywhere. No matter what coastline you’re on, they’re always there. Just a few thousand feet below water. Waiting.

It’s too much.

He gets a flat in London—Muggle London. Hermione and the Weasleys give him space. Kingsley ensures the wizarding world gives him privacy. Not that some aren’t reluctant. Rita Skeeter releases articles every day, wondering when their Boy Who Lived will return.

But Harry doesn’t see those articles.

He tries to forget who he is for awhile.

His flat is cozy. He stuffs it with plants and paintings and books. He has a cat (or three). He wears sweaters and blazers with corduroy pants. He goes to the market every morning to buy fruits and vegetables. That’s where he meets the kindly old woman who lives down the street.

She lived through World War II and so many other wars, wars that Harry has never experienced but can only imagine.

She goes to his house and she goes to hers. There’s always tea and small cakes and dinners and cocoa—apparently she believes that a teenager needs cocoa—and baking and reading and knitting.

Harry uses magic to brew the cocoa one day, not realizing that she’s standing in the doorway. She calms him by telling him that she knows all about magic. 

Their conversations shift after that. They talk about their favorite creatures and how hard it was to watch them perish before their eyes. They talk about the wall that seemingly gave way to let them enter the magical world. They talk about lions and friends and family and love and betrayals and life and death.

“When did you leave?” Harry asks one day.

She pauses, a hand resting on his cat’s head. After a moment, she looks up with a heaviness in her eyes, a heaviness that Harry sees when he looks in the mirror everyday. 

“I was young,” she says. “Younger than you are now. But I had already grown up. I didn’t want to leave, not really, but it became too much.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Some days I do, some days I don’t.” 

“Yeah…”

It’s a few months later, when he’s helping her shovel the first snow from her walkway, that he asks, “Did you ever try going back?”

“Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t,” she says, shoving a cup of cocoa into his hands. “I was shut out as soon as I hesitated.”

He pauses, nearly dropping the cocoa, before whispering, “That’s horrible.”

“What about you?” She escorts him inside, her cane tapping against the floor that he’s magically heated to warm her feet. “Would you be welcomed back?”

“Oh, yeah,” Harry says. “Til they turn on me because they don’t like the color of my shirt or because I sneezed the wrong way or because—you name it.”

She laughs and he smiles.

“Imagine that,” she softly says. “Rulers of our worlds and we’re not even allowed in them.”

“Imagine that.”

Hey lovelies, it’s @starksnack​ , new in town and with the announcement for,, you guessed it, Parkner Week 2020. *cheers in distance*

This year’s theme will be revealed on June 1, but for right now, I’m looking for a couple of mods to help out with keeping the event running smoothly. We can’t have a horse in the hospital after all.

Be sure to send us an ask (anon off) with your preferred name or screen name, age, and favourite trope if you want to work behind the scenes on the party of a lifetime.

Here are mine:

I Wont Say I'm in Love from Hercules

Cliche by mxmtoon

She by Dodie (although that's a sad one)

And Like Real People Do by Hozier

Parkner Febufluff Day 27 & 28 - Teasing & First Date

Read on AO3

*

Peter was a little bit too excited.

Ever since he found out about Tony meeting a genius kid in Tennessee years prior, Peter tracked him down and started talking to him over texts and social media. They got really close despite having never met, similar in age and in IQ, in life stories and in knowing Tony, it was easy to make conversation.

And now, Harley’s official flying up to New York to take Peter on a date, to meet for the first time since they started talking nearly a year and a half earlier, since Peter was fifteen.

Tony knows about it, knows way too much from Peter’s rambling conversations and occasionally screenshotting texts from Harley and sending them to Tony. They were always really cute, playfully flirting on each other’s social media, and it took over the media quicker than anybody could anticipate.

Peter was well known as The Intern, the quirky kid who somehow worked as Tony Stark’s personal intern at fifteen years old, now seventeen, easily winning the public’s affection with his silly tweets and his endearing personality, not to mention the pictures he took of Tony being a good person, just to prove it.

But when Harley started showing up in all Peter’s tweets and Instagram comments and even on his Snapchat story, the public started showing Harley some unwelcome attention until Tony made the public statement that he did know Harley.

And now, the media is obsessed with Harley and Peter.

“You’re not, you know, worried about your relationship being exploited like this?” Tony had asked when both Peter and Harley’s follower count had skyrocketed.

Peter had grinned, already working on a Tweet directed at Harley, “Course not. They only get to see the things we want them to see. Plus, it’s fun.”

And now, Harley and Peter are finally meeting after eighteen months of only talking online.

“Could you relax?” Tony says, lifting his eyebrows as Peter’s leg bounces under the lab bench and his fingers tap incessantly on the table. “You’re making me nervous.”

Peter looks up from his homework, corners of his eyes crinkling as he lights up in a smile. “I’m just so excited! We’re actually finally meeting! The closest thing we’ve done so far is photoshop us into pictures together.”

Tony rolls his eyes fondly, shaking his head. “He hasn’t even boarded the plane yet, kid, just relax. He’ll be here late.”

“I know, I’m just too excited! I barely slept last night-” Peter’s voice is cut off by his ringing phone. “It’s Harley! I gotta take this!”