✨

~going straight into fasting for 3 days

~gets up from the table to go purge without anyone noticing or hearing

~runs at night without parents knowing

~it only takes a week for you to get skinny

~you are not tired

~you don’t eat at all

~you exercise for 1 hour a day

~grades stay high

~“GREEN TEA HUNNNNY”

-take your vitamins sweet pea

-parents don’t ask you to eat

-cute outfits

-goes to inpatient and comes out cured

-eats 1 grape a day

~paints nails and smiles

~friends love and support you

~goes out and eats a piece of celery and nobody cares

What an eating disorder really is like

~looking in the mirror and saying you are going fast but never do

~waiting till everyone is away/asleep or you are in the shower to purge

~leaving bags of vomit under your bed

~running in place whenever you can

~staying up late looking at thinspo and crying wish you looked like that

~fasting for 24 hours then BINGING ON 4,000 calories

~grades fall

~everything is secrets secrets secrets

~getting high

~melatonin 24/7

~green tea Diet Coke water

~you sometime spend all of your time exercising and exercising and then gain a pound

~punching your stomach,pinching your thighs, and biting you arms in the the mirror because you are far

~binge binge binge purge

~purge purge binge

~black tea green tea mint tea

~“sorry cant make it to dinner”

~binges late at night

~weird fucking cravings

~either takes 1000 showers a day or takes one once a week

~HUGE sweatshirts

~goes to inpatient and then goes back because you still don’t know how to eat

~purges 1 grape

~baggy clothes

~paints nails over and over because you don’t want to eat and the smell is disgusting

~STARVE YOU DUMB FUCKING HOE

~biting off your nails

I'm constantly exhausted mentally and physically.. I'm sorry.

"You're so mean."

I've been hurt so many times that I'm constantly defensive about everything. I'm sorry.

"Why don't you wanna hang out?"

You lie to me and you're fake and I don't know how to clearly say that without hurting you even though you hurt me, I'm sorry.

"Why don't you ever do anything?"

I don't have real friends that I can trust, I'm sorry.

"Why do you act like such a victim?"

Because people only ever hurt me, I'm sorry.

"Why do you cut yourself?"

The medication doesn't work, and only makes me feel more numb, and I just want to feel something, I'm sorry.

"Why do you starve yourself?"

I hate myself, I'm sorry.

"What is wrong with you?"

I. Just. Want. To. Die...

The more I lose, the thinner I get

The thinner I get, the more I accept myself