Willow

the famous example is obviously the "because of us" scene at the beginning of s3. which is beautiful in of itself, because factually, neither of them are at fault for anything. but if thats what keeps them moving forward, let them both take the blame together. thats where they break the cycle gego tripped on and fell.

but theres one truly underrated example i think about often that i genuinely believe paints their characters in a way most of the fandom cant comprehend.

and its the "are you okay?" scene right before the goodwill event starts.

its not the first thing megumi asks when he sees yuuji. megumi specifically waits for a moment where he can pull yuuji aside and ask him privately.

"are you okay? something happened, didnt it?"

(i think megumi does it a lot, where he makes statements and adds a "huh"/"right"/"isnt it?" making them into yes or no questions. which fundamentally makes it easier to communicate and get him on the same page with the person hes speaking to)

and at first yuuji deflects with a laugh. thats where most people would stop, either because they dont care to listen further or they go like "oh okay he doesnt wanna talk about it whatever".

but megumi specifically doesnt say anything. he doesnt react, he doesnt move, he doesnt speak. he makes space for yuuji to decide. and yuuji decides to tell him the truth and to open up just the tiniest bit.

mind you, they actually knew each other only for 2 weeks at that point, with 2 months of separation.

anyway, i think the reason many people are disappointed with megumi's character development is because they took what gojo was saying in that scene as gospel. however, if you ask me, gege himself proving gojo wrong in the airport scene shows that that wasn't the intention. because there, gojo explicitly says that what he told his students about dying alone was wrong. in my opinion, the inclusion of that line is there to tell the reader: "hey, maybe not everything gojo said to megumi in that scene is right"

because...he says jujutsu is ultimately an individual sport. he loses to sukuna, alone. they win against sukuna as a group, and the ultimate lesson yuji learns is that your connections and memories with people is what makes life worth living. it doesn't matter if you're unable to execute your predetermined 'role' perfectly, your life still has value regardless of that due to the connections you've made.

gojo tells megumi to be more selfish. to imagine a stronger version of himself. to be greedier. and, in a way, to be more like him. but is that really what megumi wants? does megumi really want to be a strong sorcerer the way gojo or sukuna are?

moreover, early on in his life, megumi has internalized the fact that his life is worthless. he only finds value in protecting good people like tsumiki or yuuji. and of course, other people only value him in terms of his technique. of his potential. of his future strength as a sorcerer. whether they be toji, gojo, or sukuna, they all value megumi because of what his technique can offer. gojo tells megumi 'become strong so you're not left behind'. furthermore, megumi is never given any agency in any of this. he's sold to the zenin clan, gojo stops the sale with the collateral that megumi will become a sorcerer, and sukuna literally possesses his body, overriding his agency in a much more literal way. it's telling that gojo's first student literally becomes a weapon for someone else to wield, because that's what he always was, even to gojo himself.

however, the scene with yuji -which parallels gojo's first meeting with megumi- goes against all of this. yuji says that he understands if megumi doesn't want to live anymore because it's too painful. he says 'it would be lonely without you, fushiguro'. yuji is the first person to let megumi choose instead of forcing his own desires onto him. even the choice gojo gave him wasn't much of a choice at all (either become a sorcerer with the zenin or without them is still just being a sorcerer). yuji didn't say shit like 'i know you're strong, you can fight against sukuna!' he simply said that he understood. and that the choice was up to megumi. yuji didn't value megumi due to how strong he could be or due to his technique. yuji valued megumi because he was his friend.

anyway the thing is...megumi's problem wasn't that he was too selfless. megumi's problem that he completely stopped valuing himself due to that selflessness. he never thought that his death would have any meaning, because he knew that he would only ever be a sorcerer. he would only be a walking techinque. he had a role as a sorcerer that he never chose, and he knew he couldn't go against it. that's why megumi says "once again, i will live for others". only this time he admits that there are other people in the world besides tsumiki. if a strong sorcerer only lives for himself, then maybe megumi doesn't want to be a strong sorcerer. and what's wrong with that? what's wrong with not wanting to be what sukuna and gojo want from him?

yuji's final realization is explicitly tied to megumi's arc. yuji thought he only had value as a cog, but he realizes that's not the case. megumi was only valued as a strong sorcerer, but yuji tells him it's okay to not be strong, because what really matters is connections. idk i'm repeating myself too much, but basically it's just..deconstructing gojo's ideology, no? gojo was only ever a sorcerer and he died like one too. he still valued strength above all. he still told that he needed to be strong to not get left behind. but yuji refuses all of that. to yuji, how strong megumi is or how good of a sorcerer he is DOESN'T MATTER. yuji refuses to leave him behind, but acknowledges that megumi might not want to live anymore and gives him the CHOICE.

the reason shane folds so easily is that he doesn't think he should be upset with ilya in the first place. if he's thinking about it logically—which he is trying very hard to do!—then he thinks ilya is doing the smart thing by staying away. that six months of no contact? the correct move! from Shane's objective perspective. but he's not obejctive about ilya. and he is upset. so then he's also upset with himself for being upset with ilya in the first place. because he thinks he shouldn't be! what the two of them have going on is a very bad idea! and if they talk about it at this point, the conclusion will be that they should stop. so they don't talk. because neither of them can walk away from the other. they are down horrendous and they don't. know. what. to do about it. because they cannot have a relationship. that is what they believe at the core of it. this thing between them is impossible. and yes, they are hurting each other, but they are also hurting themselves. and they know it! but they'll take what they can get! like everyone thinks it's just Shane taking what he can get from ilya, but it works both ways! ilya is also taking what he can get from shane.

Listen, Rachel, you had the perfect set up. Ilya loves fast cars, Ilya is kind of suicidal.

From experience, that means sometimes when the road is open and the night air is cool and you have a song on that is puttering softly in the back of your skull, you push the gas down. And you don't even really mean to, not at first. Just all of a sudden you 10mph over, then 15. The road is still empty, the night air is still crisp and singing through open windows. You see the eyes of a deer through the moonlight, here and gone and maybe not there at all. The road is going to curve, you know where the curve is. You also know on the side of the curb is a drainage ditch. There's not a house for another 100 feet.

You ease off the gas, you don't want to, you don't mean it. Its a little late though and you skid through that turn at break neck speed and remember you want to live with all the force of a 2 ton chunk of metal screaming over asphalt. Maybe your tires kick up dirt. Maybe you just squeal rubber into the night air and turn your music all the way up to cover your thundering pulse.

Maybe you didn't slow down in time. Maybe you didn't mean it. Maybe you're still in that drainage anyway.