The Untold Story

HELLO?????

this has a better plot than 90% of action movies

Text box: “You’re ... an intriguing woman. Come with me (and join our company)!”

you ever think about how “mountain dew” is a really poetic name and how, if someone didn’t know what it was, they’d probably guess “some herbal tea made from the finest leaves of the Alps”. but instead, it’s just, radioactive gamer soda

adding “mountain dew” into my list of elven names alongside “morningwood”

"This crystal is good for such-and-such organ!" oh yeah name 3 of that organ's functions

"This will cleanse your body of toxins" Oh? Which ones? What are their names? Why are they bad for you? What symptoms do they cause?

No offense but where are the male porn bots

..and where are all the gods?

where’s the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?

Isn’t there a white guy to clutter up my feed?

Late at night I scroll and I block and I dream of what I need

I need a manwhore! 💥💥💥💥

Can someone PLEASE answer my question

Gandalf throwing his staff at gollum is what really makes this

Thank you for commenting because I was going to scroll past this. 

question for any entomologists out there: if bumblebees were of a comparable size to, say, a kitten, would they enjoy resting in my lap while i gently comb their fuzz with a barbie brush? i know that i would enjoy that but i hope they would as well.

hi! as an entomologist who specializes in bumble bees— my answer is probably yes! many, if not all insects groom themselves as a way to keep clean and to keep their senses sharp, but in societies of insects (specifically bees) we see them groom each other, and colonies of bees who have more allogrooming are typically stronger and healthier! these bees who groom others are integral to the colony, and we see grooming in other social insects like termites as well, specifically in relation to the queen. you might have more luck with a flea comb than a barbie brush, just to really mimic the feeling of them and others grooming it, but i like to think they would enjoy being cleaned and pampered :)

if you’re into that, giant wasps would also likely enjoy being petted since they groom themselves and each other the same way :)