florence

One of the cruelest things you can do to another person is pretend you care about them more than you really do.

the way i treat myself is nothing short of abuse i am my own worst enemy

“If you can’t get someone off your mind they are probably supposed to be there.”

You can’t do it, but you will do it. There is a paradox in you. A huge part of you that doubts yourself and a tiny part of you that trusts yourself. Hold on to that trust because your whole life depends on it.

I PUSH PEOPLE AWAY AND I ISOLATE MYSELF FROM LOVE BECAUSE I DON’T WANT ANYONE TO EVER HURT ME LIKE THE WAY YOU DID.

I want your Monday morning sleep soaked eyes dream drenched voice, lazy bones ‘five more minutes please babe.’ I want your Tuesday afternoon coffee break, glasses off, laughter on ‘just hold me for a while it’s been a hard day.’ I want your Wednesday evening fingers through hair teeth nibbling nails neck craning, eye glazing ‘this paperwork never ends’ I want your Thursday night drinks for two bones unbind muscles let loose flats, slacks, ‘just me and you’ I want your finally Friday stretch soul smile, sun sipping light from the glaciers in your eyes fingers unfurl, hand extends ‘c’mon babe, lets go wild’ I want your weekend. your movie marathon Saturday reading by the fireplace kissing in the blankets want your Sunday morning orange juice and pancakes white sheets, tender skin hair like the Fourth of July ‘let’s not get out of bed today.’ I want your ordinary and your stress, rest, release I want your bad day and that terrible night I want you drunk in my arms forgetting the place but never my name I want your lazy and your lonely and your fist full of fight I want you everyday in every way for the rest of my life.

I just want (more) love in my life. Not necessarily the romantic kind of love. Just the Sunday morning kind of love. The type that settles warmly in my stomach like morning pancakes and hot coffee. The love that feels more like a forehead kiss before heading to work or sounds like carefree laughter in the car with the windows down and soothing music playing with the wind. I want that dances-in-a-meadow kind of love. The long-time-no-see type that still feels comforting and familiar no matter what. The love that doesn’t need to apologize for not talking every day but I know it’s always there with safe hands and soft shoulders. That swing set kind of love. That honest type that lights me up all over like a moment of innocence or serenity. That best-friends-first love. That understanding love. I want more of that “hey I want to listen to you” kind of love.