maekar x fem second wife reader 18+
summary: your strange, distant marriage leads you to pursue writing westeros’s most revered scandal sheet. while you and your new husband harbor true feelings, you must navigate a new life as a step mother and lady of summerhall
warnings: arranged marriage, smut, wedding night consummation (sorta?), vaginal fingering, loss of innocence, maekar spits on your *****, no aftercare, alcoholism (daeron), maekar is bad with feelings, mentions of death
note: definitely will be a part two! also, some scandal entries are directly inspired from real lady whistedown entries so if they sound familiar, that’s why! enjoy and let me know if you’d want to be added to the tag list for this series :))
The chamber door shut with a gentle thud. And with the door’s heavy sigh, all sound was swallowed by stillness. The straggling wedding merriment, the mortal ruckus had vanished. No whisper dared stir, as though the air itself held its breath. It was a tension so dense you prayed the stone floors would engulf you. To shield you from the unbearably stiff quiet.
You stood a modest distance from one another, merely five paces. Though it was just far enough to feel ill at ease. It was a night that you had been adequately prepared for. The entirety of the day felt as though your every muscle had rehearsed it. Every deliberate movement, with the intent of procuring your perfect day.
To your youthful dismay, it was far from perfect. Upon the announcement of your betrothal, you were offered no sincere congratulations. No one you knew from home met your eyes and said, you are vastly fortunate, my Lady!
You were graciously given solemn stares and consoling words. Your position in court had the same number of takers as aspiring leech collectors. Dear friends had mourned your departure like you would soon slay yourself in the matter of moons.
You knew of your husband’s image. Gruff, stern and unspeakably blunt. He had certainly hardened with age, that was undebateable. Despite the gossip, (and nickname), you oversaw the image bestowed on the man, and approached the remainder of your days with cheerfulness. Your home regarded you as positively charming. Why would the Prince see you any different?
Oh, he’s a genius! you thought. Young, you were. Though you were under the impression he had taken note of that by now. Despite your age, you were now his political equal. Though, your composure surpasses his immensely, you‘d never boast about such matters, should your humility allow it. But you knew it was just as clear to the rest of the court.
His comment left a sneer on his face as his eyes assessed your form, from a cumbersome distance. You were merely four years older than his eldest son. If circumstances were different, you may have felt his cloak upon your back.
”But no less sensible I can…assure…you…that…” You trail off as he turns his back to you, striding toward the farthest side of the bed. Your spine corrected itself, anticipating instruction. Consummate and be done with it, you tell yourself as he settles onto the bed.
A sharp exhale leaves you as you undo your garment, the silk beginning to slide from the curve of your shoulder. You kept your eyes fixed upon him as you began to undress. While you could not slow your labored breaths, you remained attentive to your task. Your duty.
The silk fell into a puddle at your feet, the flickering candlelight cast over your bare skin. The lingering chill within the chamber scattered goosebumps on your skin, causing you to tense up. Sheepishly you approached the bed, watching him sit up as you crawled onto the mattress.
Maekar remained completely dressed, a bitter contrast to your vulnerable state.
“Lie back.“ He spoke with a gruffness that made your thighs press together. It wasn‘t cruel, or spoken with any intention of making you uncomfortable. It was simply his most gentle way of directing you.
You obliged, feeling your bare body sink into the mattress. You crossed your arms over your chest in an attempt to shield yourself from him, which to your surprise, he made no effort to move your hands. With coarse hands, he parted the soft flesh of your thighs that were clenched together. You spread your legs for him in response to the gesture, feeling yourself grow more nervous beneath his piercing gaze. His hands found your thighs once more, soothing the skin of the inside. The closer he got to your pussy, the more you felt your breath stall in your throat.
“This will be over soon, girl. Tell me and I will stop.“
His tone remained stern, steadfast to his duty. Though his words held no falseness to them. Yes, the way he speaks is gruff, like gravel running down a hill. Yet it became progressively harder to ignore the warmth growing in your stomach with each stern word he uttered.
His fingers gently began to trace your folds, earning a stifled gasp from you. It was unlike something you‘ve ever felt, let alone someone else‘s fingers. His touch was exploratory, tentative, heeding your small reactions. As his finger ran up and down your pussy, it began to collect the wetness he drew from you. But, that wasn‘t enough.
You felt it, a warm wet glob spat straight onto your eager cunt. Maekar continued rubbing the wetness up and down your slit, till he was seemingly pleased with the feeling.
His finger began to explore higher, gently rubbing your clit into little circles. The foreign sensation drew breathless whines from you, as you bucked your hips into his touch. As Maekar‘s finger returned to your core, you whimpered at the lost contact of your clit.
Though, he soon replaced the sensation with a long, thick finger, sliding itself inside your tight pussy. It stung, especially when he breached that small film of skin that confirmed your maidenhood. Yet as he withdrew the digit and drove it back deep inside you, the pain began to melt into mindless pleasure.
The sensation surprised you as the warmth deep in your tummy pooled. Your bottom lip caught between your teeth and you felt yourself being jostled by the new pace he set. He wasn‘t withdrawing his finger anymore, only thrusting them deep to hit the spot inside you that made tears well in your eyes.
You gripped the curvatures beneath you as you writhed beneath his touch. Wanton pants and moans escaped your parted lips, careless of how they may be embarrassing you before your husband (or a stranger, rather). Your hips bucked and humped into his hand as his fingers thrust harder, with a newfound haste in his touch.
“Mmmphh, my Prince- you- it feels so good, husband.“
Your whine was accompanied by the wet sounds of your pussy echoing through the chamber. Maekar grunted as he felt you clenching around him.
“Hush, needy girl. Hold still for me.“ His voice had sounded as though it had deepened. Maekar‘s tone remained stern and demanding yet it met your ears like silk slipping through someone‘s fingers. Through the haze of your aching pleasure you could see him restraining himself with every bone in his body. His cheeks bore a red flush beneath his beard, his chest heaving at a pace one could only mistake for ravenous hunger.
You only began to squirm harder despite his command, feeling the building pleasure in your core threatening to snap. You felt it grow with every brutish thrust of his finger. Until the feeling was so overwhelming, you had no choice but to succumb to the feeling.
“Fuck- my Prince I-ah, it‘s too much.“ His response to your pleads was a stifled groan as you felt your walls flutter around his fingers. The sensation climbed and climbed till it broke, drawing your bows into a tight pinch, allowing desperate moans to tear through your throat. You shuddered as your orgasm thrashed through you, Maekar fingers fucking you through your high.
As you felt it weaken and your core clench around its own emptiness, you let out a content sigh as your breathing slowed. While you enjoyed your after glow, Maekar inspected the sheets beneath you, lifting your hips slightly to grant himself a full view.
Whatever was he searching for? you thought. When you raised your head, your eyes snagged on what he had seen, a faint reddish blotch beneath you. It was proof you had been breached. Though, not necessarily bedded.
You opened your mouth, ready to ask if he was ready to actually consummate the union. The question never seemed to escape you as the room was soon blanketed in the shroud of nightfall. Maekar pinched the flame on his bedside, settling into the bed for rest to take him.
It had confused you entirely. Pleasant, yes. Anything your maids or mother spoke of? No. And it certainly wasn‘t anything that would result in children. Was proof you had been prodded at enough? Were you not to fall pregnant with his babe? As every noble wife should?
You sat in the darkness, still naked, utterly vexed as to what you were to do. For now, you decided it was nothing that would be solved in that moment, so it was best you sought rest instead.
You shuffled into bed, a cold distance from where your husband laid, faced away from you. Visions of your home, your family and everything you held dear seemed to plague your thoughts every moment you tried closing your eyes. Though to be granted sleep, you yielded to the sorrowful memories, praying every night of your life was not to be so dreary.
As the days wanned and waxed into weeks, you made yourself scarce. Attending every possible duty and indulging in every frivolous hobby. Your new gowns weren’t exceptional either. What was once elegant and pastel was now dark and heavy. Though your marital bed remained drier than sand it had grown colder than the North. You felt no dip in the mattress as you slept, no steady breathing beside you. Your “husband” had made it abundantly clear he felt no obligation to become better acquainted. Or speak to you at all. Or look in your direction, for that matter. Moons had passed and yet your marriage was still not legitimately consummated. Rather than succumbing to woe, you undertook being the lady of Summerhall and a mother to six troublesome royals.
The endeavor proved grievous, affording you scarcely a moment for your own pursuits. Leisure had become a rarity. Choosing fabrics for the royal seamstress, learning the ancient family dialect, reading ravens, sending ravens, attending to the children. And now, the botanicals, it seems.
”Are you certain, your Grace?” The caretaker of the royal gardens seemed startled by your request. You both stood before the withered, overgrown flowerbed of carnations. You had grown fond of the royal garden, though it could hardly compete with the one you had grown up with. The carnations were appallingly unkept, a heap of rotting petals. They may have bloomed years ago, by the looks of it. His hesitation was mildly insulting. You were a nature enthusiast, when day was done. If wisdom be yours in any measure, it lies in the study of flowers.
”Quite. This garden is in desperate need of something…invigorating. Something to enhance its charm. Not keep hidden behind wilted flowers. In my estimation, tulips, orchids and peonies shall do the task most handsomely. Wouldn’t you agree?” You offer the man a smile as you envision your proposal. He nods sheepishly offering you a worried grimace in return. Strange.
“Wha- you are letting me win!” Aegon pointed at the chess board, the disputatious boy pleased with his observation. You both remained in the silent library as night unfurled its sovereign bloom. Three candles illuminated the board, burning low as your match refused to seek a winner. Your chin rested upon your folded hands, raising a brow in feigned surprise.
”Daring of you to accuse me of such a thing.” You hum, taking your turn, deliberately giving him the perfect opportunity to take the king. The night grew dark and you were proving to be as old as your husband. In dire need of sleep after a day of listless, insipid tasks.
“There!! You did it again!!” His shrilly boyish voice rang through the library drawing a laugh from you. He was too smart for his own good. Yet, not smart enough to conclude you wanted to retire. You put an exaggerated look of shock on your face and a hand to your chest, earning a giggle from your opponent.
”That is utter nonsense! I would never!” Now it is the both of you laughing with little grace, filling the empty silence of the room. The likelihood of raising a child of your own grew slimmer every passing day. Though you were perfectly content in moments like these.
“Father!” The boy chirps, as your heart plummets into your gut. Your eyes go wide as you hear his footsteps draw closer, a frustrated haste in his stride. His impending presence was palpable, even with your back turned.
“Aemon, you are up quite late. With company I see.” You turn to face the boy’s father, offering something foreign to him. A smile.
”Oh, I am at fault, my Prince. Aegon could not sleep so I insisted a game of chess may ease his mind. Though he did play rather skillfully. You would be impressed.” He heaves a sigh at the explanation, deeming it verbose in his mind surely. What part of you bonding with his son did he find pernicious? You had put much effort into the matter. Wine tasting with his eldest, frolicking with his youngest. As for Aerion, you had little luck winning his regard. The girls seemed to adore you, insisting their maids replicate your hairstyle on them every waking morrow.
“Retire to your chambers, Aegon. You may finish the game tomorrow.” The boy nodded, flashing you a smile as he withdrew himself. Your reciprocated grin was cut brief, upon realizing Maekar meant to speak with you. What could he possibly want after avoiding you like the plague?
”Does something trouble you, my Lord?” You kept your voice gentle as you straightened your skirts. Your patience knew no bounds, much like his brother. If he wished to be angry, unable to find the right words, then you would welcome the unbearable quiet.
“They were hers. The carnations.” Without further explanation, you knew the woman in which he referred to. The woman whose shoes have dwarfed you entirely.
“I am…terribly sorry, your Grace. It was never my intent to over step. The fault is mine.”
”Do not coddle me, woman.” His tone grew firm, the tone he used in political discourse. The tone he uses to evoke fear. It was purely calculated tactic. You were unafraid of your husband. And you certainly do not cower behind babbling apologies.
“I am not coddling you, your Grace. I am merely conveying my regret. Apologizing for my carelessness. I know there is no replacing what you’ve lost. Man and wife should be able to have such conversations, without fear or judgement.”
”I had a wife. And you are not her.” In a fleeting second, he turns, withdrawing himself. Like he had done since the day you wed, he marooned you in solitude. Cast you into a dark quiet where no solace dwells. A companion to none.
His gruff words impaled your now rotten sense of hope. He does not even wish to try to start anew. You are forced to care for the children she cannot, and rejected by your husband, wistful for his late bride. But I am right on time, you thought. You were meant to marry at this age, to be enamoured, to have children of your own. Yet you were confined to a marriage your husband was still mourning.
The feeling made you writhe in your own skin. You weren't a woman of hubris or pride. Yet it pained you to blend so seamlessly into the walls. So overlooked, unforgivably undermined. Another radiant noblewoman forced into red and black. You were proven to be too cheerful for this family. Too quick to smile. As though your own warmth had outcasted you.
You exhausted yourself, competing with a ghost. Rivalling ash. To hold you to her standard was unjust. It was dishonorable, to make you contend with the dead. If they meant to disregard your value, you shall disregard theirs, you decided. Beat their image to a pulp. Slay their false prestige. Why stop at the royal family? Why not uncover every misdeed and flaw noble families harbor like sin? Relay every detestful thought you shooed from your mind. Every snarky jest you had to stifle by biting your tongue.
There was truth to the bitter assessments. And Seven knows greed is unladylike. The amiable thing to do is share. Before you could defy the immoral tempt, your gaze flicks to the parchment and quill on a desk. How it begged it to be used. To be a device of callous truth. Who were you to deny it such glory?
As the bells of septs toll and the candles burn in noble halls, there arrives amongst you a humble scribbler. One who keeps no banner, bears no crest, and yet observes more than many a lord. It is my kindest intention to set quill to parchment and faithfully recount the triumphs, follies, dalliances and indiscretions that flourish so abundantly in our realm.
One may wonder by what authority I undertake such task. The answer is relatively simple: none at all. Yet, while knights ride to tourneys and ladies exchange honeyed words behind their jeweled fans, someone must preserve truth of what truly passes between them.
And what a fortnight it has been.
Lord Arryn was observed departing a maid‘s chamber well after the moon had been hung at its highest. Though the Lord claims he had merely been discussing the matters of estate management, one suspects broomsticks were not the only items receiving close examination that evening.
Nor may this author neglect the unfortunate incident at Lord Tully‘s feast, wherein two noblemen nearly came to blows over an emerald necklace, a disrupted inheritance, and if—whispers speak true—the affections of the same maiden. The necklace survived the encounter. The gentleman‘s dignity did not.
Yet these matters are but the smallest drops in a very deep goblet.
For beneath every velvet cloak lurks a secret, behind every courtly smile a hidden ambition, and within every grand castle chamber a tale begging to be told.
Rest assured, dear reader, this author shall keenly discover them all.
Until then, guard your reputations carefully.
One never knows who may be listening.
Lady Jena snickered to herself as she brought a Dornish red to her lips. It has been one month since you made a slave of all ravens. As the slander scrolls made their debut, noble houses became fussy, displeased and utterly captivated.
They were amusing each other with their own transgressions and wrongs. A scene of rare hilarity, as they laughed heartily at one another. All stirred by the governance of your own quill.
The fear you dangled above their noses simply because you wield the pen and them, the foolishness. The transaction of gossip for coin turned out to be a remarkable sum indeed. You used the proceeds to employ more ears across the realm, harvesting filthy dalliances and common yammer. Every scroll sold more than the last. It became the name on everyone’s tongue.
“Do the scrolls amuse you, my Lady?” You ask, your tone more smug than you would’ve liked. Jena and you were now sisters, (mostly). She was fascinating company to keep. Her words were thought provoking, or plainly provocative, depending on her cups.
“How could they not? She is the first gossip writer to address the subjects by name. I should like to meet her, before she is hanged.” Her remark earned a scoff from you. You glanced around the royal terrace in which you lounged.
Beneath the kindly gaze of the sun, your spirits were made warm as the hours passed. Humorous stories and womanly horrors spilled freely from your lips in the company of greenery. You minded your tongue, omitting any details about the security of your coupling and the ink stains on your fingers.
Perhaps with time she will come to know of these things. After exiling the image of being hung, you set your eyes proudly upon your royal garden. A flowerbed of assorted beauties beside a now blooming bed of carnations.
“You know how court can be. So exacting, so much…propriety. It is exhausting to pretend we don’t fraternize with stable boys ever so often, or speak ill of our own kin. I think it is a remarkable thing indeed, even if we must endure the laments of the offended nobles. They should be learning discretion, rather than blaming the scribbler.”
Jena nodded slowly at your words. You could not be so obvious with your flattery, nor could you openly detest the writings. You had to remain impartial yet amused. A line finer than a rib in famine.
“And how often is it you fraternize with stable boys, my Lady?” She asked through a light chuckle.
“Till it starts to border on overindulgence, I’d say.” You both begin to laugh. Perhaps the heat had begun to melt your manners.
“The noble houses have only two choices. Put an end to their shameful deeds, or find clever ways to hide them.” To that, the rims of your goblets meet with a gentle clink. You sat before the chess board, callow nobles playing the opponent. You could give them every chance to win and prove their self proclaimed graciousness. You could eliminate every pawn and examine every fault. They could dare to outsmart you or succumb to your rules. But the wisest will let Lady Hollowmere decide for them.
I must send felicitations to Lord and Lady Mormont. Congratulations and stamina as they embark on the most exhilarating time in a young couple's life. I am, of course, talking of the honeymoon. Is there a more romantic notion? To retreat from society together finally leaving watchful eyes behind.
You crumple the parchment in your palm, smearing your skin with black ink. Seven above, pull yourself together, you think. Lady Hollowmere‘s misfortune shall find no root in your envy. You’d be incapable of forgiving yourself if your own troubles jeopardized your writings.
You’d be incapable of forgiving yourself if your own troubles jeopardized your writings. Morning, tender and unrisen, found you seated at your desk in stillness. It was the only hour you were afforded the time to write, even if it meant wrangling your mind awake. Swaddled in a linen chemise, quill shaking in your grasp, unkept hair falling from your shoulders. Your eyes are hazy from rest, though your ears worked exceptionally. In the midst of your frustration, you were forced to abide the dreadful symphony of his sleep. Behind you, your “husband’s” steady hushed snores found your ears like ocean tide. A galling, nettlesome, abrasive, exasperating ocean tide. With a huff, your quill is reunited with ink.
The frenzy of competition. The thrilling delight of hazarding your all. I am referring not to the lure of King Landing‘s gambling halls, but to a gamble with far higher stakes. Matrimony. For once that particular wager is placed, it cannot easily be undone. A fact which, I am sure, is met with both regret and sheer relief.
You whip around in your seat, spitefully glaring at the bane of your success. There he laid, sleeping as though he did not carry the burden of a secret so critical. As the sounds persisted, you resisted the urge to not write word of him committing loathsome debauchery, despite it being treasonous. The stifled snorts burrowed themselves deep within your good graces, bones and joints beginning to itch.
“WILL YOU STOP THAT?? I AM TRYING TO WRITE OF LORD AND LADY MORMONT‘S SEXUAL DEVIANCE, YOU SORRY EXCUSE FOR A HUSBAND!! I WOULDN’T BE IN SUCH STATE IF YOU WOULD JUST ACKNOWLEDGE I EXIST!!”
Your voice was hardly above a whisper, just loud enough for him to stir. Another sigh escaped you as you tried returning to your work a third time. You rubbled slow circles into your temples, undoubtedly spreading the ink onto your face.
If you allude to your own unhappy coupling, the small council will discover you like hungry hounds. If you write fondly of the Targaryen’s, the people will lose trust in you. If you write ill of the Targaryen’s, your ruby necklace will soon be replaced with rope. Similar to how you must speak of the scrolls, you must remain impartial. You are not regarded for hate speech. You are regarded for honesty. So falsehoods, they shall have!
The chase, the hunt, the thrill. It is a fact that all the world is searching for something. And our dear court is no exception. Some are searching for meaning, others for their better halves, while others are searching for tranquility, much like the honorable Prince Baelor and the lovely Princess Jena; who have decided to seek respite in Summerhall this month. And for one of the court’s most notorious bachelor, Prince Daeron Targaryen, who was last seen arriving fashionably late to the Lady Anvil‘s banquet. Even the most determined rakes must bow to that most powerful of forces, mothers. This author cannot help but wonder what he is searching for. More wine? Sensibility? But be cautious of searching too hard, dear reader, for you might not always like what you find. Ladies of court may have a new prize to seek, the heart of a certain eldest son. It seems this free-spirited reveling drunkard has been seen chasing the regards of Ladies, intent on leaving bachelor life behind. This author can only speculate. Could it be this rake has reformed?
With steadfast heart and urgent step, you made your way in haste through the castle’s depths. The latest Hollowmere was now put in the covetous hands of the public, having sent the scrolls six nights passed. Surely, there are at least twenty vessels and ships making their way to the keep at this very moment. Not a breath could be wasted, time was dearer than gold in a pauper’s purse.
You greeted passing servants, maids and guards with an unyielding grin as your plan unfurled. Without breaking haste, you open the chamber door, humming to yourself as you open the drawn curtains,
“Good morrow, Daeron!” You hum, drinking in the state of his chamber. It was a sty, to put it kindly. Broken, assorted, empty, full bottles littered as far as the eye can see. Everything was so askew, it almost looked purposeful. It was no condition a wife should have to reside in.
“Come now, up, up!” You give several light slaps to the plane of his cheek as he begins to resurrect himself. With strangled whines, his eyes flutter open, adjusting to the light of day.
”W-wha…is something the matter, mother? Why must you wake me?” His voice gravelly from sleep. You snatch the bottle from the crook of his elbow, setting it on his bedside.
”Well, the sun has been up for quite some time. But, no matter. Your father and I are overjoyed by your news! This is momentous, Daeron! We are somewhat displeased with hearing the word from the newest Hollowmere, but-“
“Wait- wait…wha-Hollowmere? Whatever do you mean?” He rubs the fatigue from his eyes as you watch panic envelop his sullen features. To conceal the amused smile on your lips, you turn your back to him, beginning to tidy his chambers the best you could manage.
“Oh, have you not read? She has written on your search for a wife! There are twenty ships, thirty caravans and fifteen carriages making their way to Summerhall as we speak, full of eligible young ladies. So many prospects you will get to choose from. The choice will be taxing, I’m sure. They are all so eager for your favour.”
His brows furrow, looking as though this was a nightmare he could not wake from. He put his palm so his perspiring forehead, trying desperately to come to his senses. You watch vexation, anger and worry cycle through his mind as he finds his bearings.
“I-I said no such thing. It is a lie, what she has written.” You grimace at his plea for mercy, seating yourself at the foot of his bed.
“Lady Hollowmere doesn’t write rumour, she writes truth. Her words are practically gospel. Perhaps your drunken stupor left you no memory of such a declaration. But this will be advantageous, Daeron. You are of age and need to take a wife. Find a lady to your liking before your father marries you to a stranger. You should have that privilege, to marry for love. And if none of them are to your liking, I will send them back as soon as you wish. But you must promise me you’ll try.”
His eyes soften, seeing through you like a veil. Daeron was your son now, despite the small number of years between you. You accepted that responsibility as you accepted his father’s cloak on your back.
If you could shun him from being promised to a woman he did not know, you‘d do everything in your power. Marriage is just as political as war and dispute. A profitable transaction of virtue and binding promise. An economic, fiscal, monetary exchange of vows. But if you could give Daeron a chance of finding a love match, you would be content knowing someone will live the future you could not.
“Thank you, mother. I will try, for you.” You nod, beaming at the drunkard who is willing to endure hundreds of blood thirsty ladies, for the sake of making his miserable step mother happy.
“I know your indulgence is an escape. I know you are frightened by what you see. But, there is a charming man beneath all these cups. Ladies will prefer him, rather than Daeron the Drunken.” You tutted, reaching for the port you set on his bedside.
As you confiscated the bottle, you made your way to the door, allowing him to prepare for the remainder of the day awaiting him. Considering it is almost lunch.
“I will send for a barber. And a bath. And someone to clean this… bachelor lodging.” You offer him a final fleeting smile before you withdraw yourself.
Outside his door, you silently celebrated with yourself. You had done the unthinkable. You had gotten Daeron the Drunken to entertain the prospect of marriage. With the intent of finding love. Perhaps you really were the prophet Lady Hollowmere was rumored to be.
With no small measure of dread, you beheld the hour where you must commence the third scheme, one you had long feared above the rest. You held your next course of action in deepest apprehension. You sat in your husband’s study, in solitude, a heavy stillness blanketing the room. It was beyond my comprehension how he managed to achieve anything in this study.
Agonizingly quiet, and tidied to a suffocating degree. The impeccable precision of the desk, shelves, trestle tables were all too neat to even touch. You knew your marriage would be annulled the moment you laid womanly fingers on any of his belongings. So you sat, hands fixed in your lap, glimpsing around the one room in Summerhall you had not yet seen.
Though you suppose he won't be back for some time. There is little harm in just observing, right? Perhaps you could even learn something about the man you call a husband. His most favored book? Favored hobby? His handwriting? The quill he uses? There was so much discovery so few paces away.
You abandon my restraint, rising from my seat. You gawk at every small trinket, every tome and every undusted surface. It was a captivating exhibition that had immersed you entirely. A glimpse into where he spends his hours, away from you.
“Ahem.” The feigned throat clearing from the door alerted you of his return. He did not seem pleased with your snooping, but he did not order you to leave. You suppose that is a good start.
“Your Grace, I-I was just…looking. It’s n-“
”I did not send for you.”
”I’m aware. I came by my own accord.”
He hums in reply, though his face conveys an emotion too complex to decipher. His existence was a sick riddle. One you would spend the rest of your days endeavoring to solve.
“Why?” His question came across as a demand, vexed as to why you meant to speak with your own husband.
“We have a certain eldest son’s future to discuss. I’m sure you’ve received word of Daeron’s search for a wife. I was meaning to inform you I’m hosting a ball, so that he may acquaint himself with eligible ladies.”
”My son does not swoon. He whores. He drinks. You will find no such luck in the matter.” You shrug at his candid words. He knew him better than you, sure. But that did not mean he could predict forthcoming events. Moody old bastard.
“As true as that may be, we do not know until we try. Someone may catch his eye. And I’m hopeful of it, so that we are not forced to marry him to a stranger. I mean…just look how content we are.” You chuckle to yourself, making light of my misery.
“We are plenty fucking content. Now go.” With a sigh of defeat, you begin your stride towards the door where he stands. You approach him with slow steps, the space between you growing smaller with each pace. With an arched brow he looked down upon you, assessing the mischief you wore on your face.
“I will host the gathering. You will be glad of it, my Lord. I swear it.” You extend your pinky finger to him, which only makes his brows pinch together in vexation. With sheepish hesitation, and apparent detest for such frivolous promise, he ensnares his pinky with your own. The action brought a pleased grin to your lips. It was the first time he had touched you since the wedding. Though your kiss was scarcely a kiss at all. Just a brief meeting of skin.
“Excellent. And do buy new ink, you are dipping your quill in mud.” He rolls his eyes as he opens the door to his study, ushering you out of it. With a brief and courtly smile, you withdrew yourself, waving daintily with your fingers.
The great hall gleamed like a reliquary of silver and red. Hundreds of beeswax candles burned in wrought-iron chandeliers overhead, their flames trembling against banners embroidered with red dragons. Long tables stretched the length of the chamber beneath black linen cloth, laden with roasted boar glazed in spiced honey. Silver goblets caught the firelight and scattered it like captive stars across the gathering.
Noble ladies shimmered in velvet and silk, jeweled sleeves brushing polished oak, while Lords laughed over brimming cups of wine dark garnets.
And beside you, your husband.
The title still felt strange upon your tongue. Husband. A man chosen by signatures and seals by alliances drawn upon parchment long before either of you had been consulted. Life between you remained stiff, despite your most charming nature. His defiance frustrated you, but it was nothing you allowed yourself to weep over.
Yet, that evening, something shifted. You felt it.
At first, you tentatively watched him out of pure curiosity. Voices swelled. Goblets clinked. The hall grew warm with merriment. And yet, amid all the splendor, you became strangely aware of the simple nearness of him. It was duty, yes. Though it felt more contained than that. Every brush of your sleeves, every time you clung to his arm tighter, startled him more than the fanfare of instruments.
You would often stand on your tip-toes to comment upon some amusing observation, often rooted in harmless cruelty. His acknowledgment of these remarks were low hums, only intended for your ears. Despite his efforts, you could sense his amusement in your jests.
Love, you once imagined, would arrive with thunderous certainty. A knight‘s triumph, a poet‘s declaration, a bolt from the clouds.
Instead, it came like snowfall upon an open field. Silent. Seeping. Gentle. Undetectable. Unnoticed by you until your world would transform.
The evening deepened and the candles began to burn lower. You found yourself hoping the feast would never end. Not for the revelry, nor the music nor the wine.
But because every time you glanced up at Maekar, you discovered another reason to remain.
The feast had been an overall success. Dazzling floral arrangements, a plethora of guests and a night entirely spent on the arm of your husband. You could sense the stiffness of his chest as you clung to him, greeting all who arrived. You were beaming, despite the circumstances. It felt real.
Being anchored to the man who vowed to love you, to protect you. Though he did not put much effort in either, it felt correct in a sense. Like jigsaw pieces finding one another. There were brief hitches of time where you‘d peer up at him, and watch his scowl relax into something more neutral. Not joy, or adoration, but tranquility. Your soothing presence ironed the wrinkles from his scowling face.
As for Daeron, he did not manage to meet a Lady worthy of his attention—to his standards, at least—and found himself swarmed with eager ladies all evening.
“Well, real attachment rarely forms over one feast. He‘ll find a lady to his liking as soon as he outgrows whores. And we will be patient, husband. We mustn't rush him into such matters. It‘s overwhelming for a boy his age.”
He gruffly hummed in acknowledgement. Not agreement, nor protest. Simply just, I can’t seem to disregard the noise coming from your mouth. You sat beneath the coverture of your bed, a silk white sleep shift affording you little warmth.
You reached over to extinguish the candles on your bedside, the wick hissing as your fingers pinched the flame. Your chambers were illuminated solely by the flickering light of the hearth. You restrained yourself from yammering, apprehensive you may drive him forth in dread.
It was most challenging to keep silent. For such a guarded, sullen man, you wished for nothing more than to berate him with your every whim. Your day, your progress on the harp, your sentiments on lemon tarts, your affinity for honeybees…
”What ever are you gawking at, woman?” His bitter tone impales the quiet, waking you from your daze. Unbeknownst to you, your eyes had not left his undressing form. His progress in the matter was small, still fully dressed, to a capacity. It was mildly surprising, given how long you had stared.
“Sorry, sorry. I shall give you privacy.” You rolled, turning your back to him. You suppose it is improper to see a man undress when you are not wholly wedded. Because you were not bedded, (not in the way that counts, anyway). With a sigh, you sink further into the mattress. The new position overwhelmed you with newfound ease, your weary frame a hair‘s length from sleep. You remained silent, your breaths deepening. It was enough to give the impression you were asleep. Especially to a man who could not see your face.
You feel the mattress dip beneath his weight as he climbs into bed. Your shared bed. The bed he had not slept in since your wedding night. You swallow your nerves, maintaining the farce of your own slumber. He groans, shuffling beneath the covertures.
You believe he had stilled, finally taken rest like you had. The following moments prove your estimation wrong, hearing him stir once more. The weight beside you grows closer, as he props himself on one elbow. In quiet vigil he drank you in. You gentle slope of your fluttering lids, the soft parting of your perfect lips.
To you, he was cold and hardened. It was his defense, a device of not letting you grow too fond or close. What in him was worth loving, he thought to himself. In his eyes, you were fair as the first blush of dawn upon the eastern hills. You moved with a grace that seemed borrowed from goddesses. Your countenance was as delicate yet striking as a rose newly awakened in a garden. Cheeks touched with the soft grace of youth. He was denying himself something he was addicted to, without even indulging in first.
He knew his feelings would surpass what he‘d allow, and felt it safer to let you live out your days away from him. But with wine on his breath and restraint growing thin, he couldn‘t help just gazing. When his stare grew in greed, he raised a finger, gently swiping a stray lock of hair from your face. His lips curled into a wounded smile, admiring you as you “slept“.
He was well aware your beauty was not your greatest adornment. If he was going to be forced to marry it would not be to a fool. You bore yourself with a noble kindness, a steadfast loyalty and a warmth that made hearth and hall alike feel blessed. You were his comfort and delight, but most of all his greatest peril. His most fearsome torment.
“Sōvegon ēdruta, ñuha ābrazȳrys.” (sleep well, my wife) You hear him croak as he settles into rest. It was a strangled sound, only meant for his ears. A hushed confession he harbored like secret. It wasn’t meant for you to hear, or understand. The words had stunned you as you laid, partially convinced you had dreamt it. Had he not seen the Valyrian text on your bedside?
@astarkofwinterfell @meetmeattheriver