A Memoir,,

Today I skipped a whole volleyball tournament bc I spranined tf outta my ankle and all I’ve done is watch old vines and steal my brothers vape. I really wanted to hang out with my friends but Easter is tomorrow. I want some cool shit fro Easter but I think I’m too old to do anything. Also my moms family is straight up destroyed lmao my grandparents go divorce like 2 times so I bet it’s just gonna b stressful. But idk I guess I don’t mind hanging with the fam. But on Monday I’m about to chill with my girls and their foreign exchsge student.

I have to start dating these shit shows

I’m tired and I don’t think I’m getting any Easter presents.

Bruh I’m going through hard nicotine withdrawals. I need my brother to buy me some goddamn pods. I’m sort of scared bc when I first got my vape I got it bc everyone had one basically and I guessed I liked the head rush, but now it’s like I’ll have just a little after a long day it’s like it cured a headache I don’t know I had. All of this may be concerning but I’m getting some goddamn strawberry pods to fuel my cloud lung

I gotta start drawing, when I get home I’m gonna put on some tunes and crank out some freaking drawings. I’m gonna draw a bunch of kids hanging out or something. Something very unoriginal

I just watched all these old snaps and god I should take more videos of my life. I loved looking back on my life. I want to take a bunch of videos this summer and then put them all together as like a movie. I really want to be a movie maker when I grow up

oh helllo is the single best piece of comedy I have ever seen and I’m gonna dress as George st. Geigland for Halloween next year

I just watched elders react to Lana del ray and it was the best thing I ever watched seriously made my goddamn day I love Lana

Bruh!! I just write this super long Sally post abt my best friend and tumblr just deleted it without saving it to my drafts and I’m pissed I spent ally of time any emotional energy writing that and I’m pissed!! Maybe it was a sign that i should keep it to myself bc it was very personal and shady but I’m still super pissed bc wtf u know

Ok so I have this friend group of like girls that I’ve known since gradeschool and then some, and I love them all but like u know that feeling when u know ur squad is slowly turning into a toxic soup bc like we all talk abt each other way to much, and like I’m spilling the tea when I tell u that we have like these Snapchat gc where we will have everyone in the group in it except one person and we will talk abt them, and like I’ve never been the one to make it, but like isn’t that crossing a line? Like what the actual fuck, how goddamn toxic can it be, and at this point I’m wondering if there’s one abt me bc honestly I’m such a bitch. But like I have this awful group that is like hanging together by like strands of like hot glue spring if u know what I mean, and then I have like the group of friends that I met in like middle school that are like the realest fucking bitches that are actually just like me, and I think that is just because I didn’t grow up with them and like I basically chose them. And we all have the same sense of humor and every time I see them it’s like a weight lifted off my shoulders and the dynamic of the group is so beautiful and we’ve known each other just long enough to know everything about each other and yet also not be like forced to be friends because we have known eachother for our whole lives. And like the amazing group is the one where my straight up best friend is like straight up, not like “one of my best friends” like my straight up ride or die soulmate type shit and it feels Wierd to like have someone that u Have known for less time be your best friend when u have ppl that have known u for like 10 years. But yeah

First of all call me by your name is the fuckiing best movie I’ve ever seen annnd well love Simon, okay alright i respect any mainstream gay movie, bc we love a good representation but we all know full and well which is better ,, and that’s the truth I’m sorry goodnight

So basically bitch!! This summer better b lit. Bc I have literally been talking about summer with my friends nonstop bc we just saw call me by your name and lady bird so we are all up on that teen party life/ beautiful calm summer shit™️ and if I’m not constantly naked with my tiddies out/ finding my inner soul then I’m fucking gonna file a goddamn complaint to somebody. Okay this is coming off way aggressive, all I want to do is be very graciously topless while half baked listening to a beautiful like Neil young song or some shit by a large body of water with all of my friends and then we take a large group nap and then we drive home listening to dark red by Steve lacy bc we all know that is a bop car song and then we go to someone’s house and chill and watch like good shows and then we go out party or something. But like also I’m gonna b on the swim team practicing hopefully and also I have a job but like I can fit my ideal life in between those two hopefully.

So what I’m trying to do rn is like a diary or sorts. Bc like I’ve tried to do a diary before like on goddamn paper, but I have no motivation??! And I think cell phones are ruining this generation probably so like my brain looks at anything that isn’t a screen and Completley shuts down. But anyway like I used to have this lit ass diary in like 7th grade, where I would like draw and shit and it was like a perfect representation of my life, but now it’s like I can’t write, bc I feel like I’m doing a biology summary or some shit, and like I lost all my drawing creativity shit. But I do want to start drawing again, bc looking back on that shit is the best. Idk something about looking into ur thought process from the past is so amazing to me. So hopefully through this dingey ass tumblr page I can like do the same thing, accept less cool and creative. But whatever I’m trying

I’m so pumped bc I get to be out of school for like maybe a month?? Right after spring break?? Spring break 2.0 bitch. All the teachers in my state are protesting so who fucking knows when I’ll go back,, but school,, I do NOt miss her. I have 0 focus so, now I won’t have to bullshit all my papers anymore. I’m like a smart student I guess, don’t get me wrong, I’m just HELLA lazy so if I have to try at anything,, no, like duck that shit

Bruh when did my memory,, get so god awful, like I can not remember the most simplest of memories. like I do not remember anything that happened last week or like last year. When is the last time I had a coherent thought, or was like clear headed?? Hmmm?? I don’t fucking remember?? Like last year, I could remember my whole life, like day to day could tell u my routine, but now it’s like,, there is to much shit in my life going on, like new experiences that,, I just have no idea what’s going on. Lmao.