The Gillyweed Monologues

As if I have to be beautiful and self-actualized to be loved. I don't. I just have to live and try to be present for it, and mess up and try again and practice. Something I said to Mark the other day when he bemoaned his forgetfulness-- "So am I, but you have many other redeeming qualities. That's what I tell myself." Yesterday I listened to "The River" by Leon Bridges on the train and cried because it's about giving yourself over to something bigger, like a higher power or a body of water. Not just giving but letting it carry you, letting it take you to where you will be. I wondered if god, or love, or time, will take me there. Where I am already redeemed.

when you know why you’re happy