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WIZARD COUNCIL 2021 BANNED SPELL LIST:

Unending penis barrage

Summon Ketamine Ape

Greater Baja Blast

Transmute Idaho

Homoerotic Vortex

#a classic #wish we could have a little homoerotic vortex though #as a treat

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quick, everyone who has not listened to the entirety of Musical Transients by Psynwav please do that now. if you need a pitch, imagine Mouth!Neil Cicerega decided to minmax her transition reveal for meme density, quality of song pulls, and editing smoothness. unbelievable recontextualization work going on here. seriously, she does not miss.

#psynwav #mashup #album #trans #trans rights #the prequel musical tangents is good too #Youtube

txttletale

efforts towards a "positive vision of masculinity" or whatever are so funny because what these guys are trying to figure out is literally "what's a way of being a good person that's Not For Girls™"

the-pallid-princess

adding @unidentifiedfuckingthing 's comment

holy-leapin-splits-batman

fluffysheeple

christian bad driver: my guardian angel watches over me, I don't need to look before I merge

atheist bad driver: I will rely on my own skill to see myself safely home after a mere 8 drinks

agnostic bad driver: no one knows where all these dents and scratches came from

weatherwhim

zionist bad driver: this lane was promised to me by God 4000 years ago, so I am merging in front of you *break checks your car* why are you tailgating me?

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voidambassador

milquetoaast

source

girlfailure-poetics

TME trans people will articulate the specific way TME trans people are even privileged in transphobic rhetoric and then go “see? we’re in the same boat :)”

girlfailure-poetics

and then say it again

girlfailure-poetics

at one point he was asked which he thought was better to be in the eyes of the law: a confused girl or a predator? and he responded “what does the law have to do with social classes? try to stay on topic.” fuckin hilarious stuff

creepymutelilbugger

fuckin “what does the law have to do with social classes” is an absolute all timer. like. what does cooking have to do with eating”. round of applause

dostoyevsky-official

what's worrisome is that everyone has more or less the same primordial version of history these days when you look into mainstream discourses, just like putin. ukrainians say they're actually the real inheritors of kievan rus, the russians are asiatic barbarians. israelis say they have a 2,000-year-old biblical claim to the land. azeris and armenians go back and forth over who has lived in the caucasus since time immemorial. china says taiwan was always chinese and pulls out 17th century fishing maps for the south china sea. and so on, and so forth, none of this broaches the fact that the real problem here is that people are getting bombed, tortured, and raped in the name of these pathetic fantasies, not the veracity of the claims

regardo1975

...only those who understand

6qubed

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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strawberry-crocodile

theres two kinds of hating on elves, justified anti-white supremacy, and misogyny. and also those two can coexist in the same person.

strawberry-crocodile

just to elaborate

elves are frequently white-coded. they are often written as seeing other "races" as lesser, and use the language of real life racism- 'savage', 'children', etc. the narrative often justifies this by giving them a grand, ancient history, innate talents, art, culture, etc that other peoples are shown to lack or simply have less of or are "inferior". they are also usually visually coded with features common to peoples of northern europe; pale skin, long bony faces, downward pointing noses, blonde hair, tall, etc.

thus, some people you find hating on elves are expressing hatred towards white supremacy and a rejection of the idea that there is an Objectively Better race. i think those people are correct in their values and justified in expressing that in a jokey way that engages with the modern fantasy genre.

on the other hand, elves are almost always also coded as feminine. they are naturalists as opposed to industrialists, artisans and intellectuals as opposed to laborers. they are thin, with long head hair and no facial hair. they are emotional, capricious, and impractical. you will often, historically and in modern conservative spaces, straight up see transmisogynistic slurs like "sissy" levied at elves. this almost always goes hand in hand with contrast to dwarves, who are codified as hairy muscular industrialist practical laborers. you even see this in elven wine vs dwarven beer.

i deeply resent when elves are used this way and have a kneejerk reaction whenever i see someone larping as a dwarf who hates elves.

this also touches on the way in which misogyny is used as a shorthand for the bourgeoise! the rugged manly rural farmer in jeans vs the sissy foppish intellectual sex pervert! the way many transmisogynists imagine all trans women as privileged white rich intellectuals that they can Punch Up!

so like. anyway yeah go out and larp as an elf hater as someone conscious of the imagery and language youre using and think VERY CAREFULLY about why you hate elitist intellectual tree hugging sissy faggot elves.

chongoblog

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Groovy

mysillycomics

Hell Song

a-book-of-creatures

Just introduced my fiancee to this masterpiece and watched her expression cycle through all 5 stages of grief in rapid succession

bogleech

c-rowlesdraws

cat-mermaid

If you didn’t click play on that video before reading this, and are considering scrolling back up to listen while thinking “it can’t be that bad”, i invite you to think up the worst possible song your brain can muster

now stop

fool

you’re actually thinking up a song, stop that

now imagine: think of what a loud (but not yelling) 8 year old would word salad while pressing all the keys on a demo synthesizer keyboard at circuit city in the year 1994

now imagine a witch kisses that child on the top of their little head, and that child magically transforms into a perfect genetic copy of 38 year old Paul McCartney

….and keeps singing and going ham on that keyboard like nothing just happened

now you are ready

listen to the song

weatherwhim

i'm sorry, people are up in arms about this? this is just a normal shitass synth loop with American!Paul McCartney singing over it. the lyrics aren't even worse than most late-stage Beatles fare. some of you just hate dissonance istg.

gonna put a moratorium on adding this to my playlist until I figure out whether it is actually good, but it is very distinctly *something*. calling Paul an 8-year-old banging on a synth keyboard for writing this is a complement to 8 year olds. give the children keyboards.

whosname

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

toroidalearthtruther

"less is more" is a lie perpetuated by big small to sell more less

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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preserving-tiktok

taraljc

This is an awesome use of what is probably a master's degree if not a doctorate and I am 100% thrilled that she shared it even though it was embarrassing and she squeaked.

liminalbeauty

Thank you, adorable scientist, for making people's lives better.

punchspeedchunk

As an Australian, THIS WOMAN IS A FUCKING GODSEND.

weaselle

Californian (sup, fellow desert-havers) i've been using this since i saw it and it works so fucken good dude (i often have to put like 8 dogs in my car, so it's extra important my car isn't attempting to go super-nova when we get in)

rudebunny-g

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“No time for dancing, or lovey dovey, I ain’t got time for that now”

the-haiku-bot

“No time for dancing,

or lovey dovey, I ain’t

got time for that now”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

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