worms in my brain 🪱🪶

I love you speculative biology. I love you worldbuilding projects. I love you creature design. I love you fantasy biology. I love you speculative evolution. I love you science fiction.

‘beyond the scope of this paper’ is a dear friend to me. I Am Not Fucking Talking About That

Introductions to academic papers will be like "everyone knows that the sea is cold (citation), as well as salty (5 different citations). Things live in there (citation) and the environment is important to that (2 citations)"

Ok I found this genuinely helpful today, having recently been dealing with long-term stress and a creeping amount of anhedonia. There are several brilliant ideas in here, I highly recommend giving it a read.

listening to one of my little book podcasts and the girlies are LOSING IT because they read Parable of the Sower and don't know what to make of the #problematic relationship between the teenage protag and a man older than her father. literally out here talking about how it's a weird oversight in a book that's otherwise so brilliant and progressive, like it's some kind of mistake that Butler made. I genuinely like this show and mean no disrespect to the host but some bitches are not cut out for Octavia Butler, that's like the most normal relationship she ever wrote.

at risk of being pretentious I've long suspected that a fair number of people who hype Octavia Butler up for being a Black Woman Science Fiction Writer not only not haven't actually read much of her work but would throw up if they did

You never recover from being weird in middle school

"live every day like it's your last": scary. weirdly foreboding. not a good thought process if you get anxious easily. stressful. so much pressure that it loops back around to making you do nothing. "live every day like it's your FIRST": everything becomes fascinating. renews the excitement of discovering things for the first time again. makes you feel like exploring stuff. #mywisdom

I love you paladins I love you knights I love you sword and shield brawlers I love you intimate healing I love you warriors with a code I love you unbearable weight of expectations I love you longing for the quiet life you gave up so others may have it I love you fighting to the last breath I love you doing the right thing I love you doing the wrong thing and spending the rest of your days dealing with the consequences I love you hubris I love you god complex I love you plate armor

when you grew up as a lonely uncool girl it will never stop haunting you by the way. you will meet a cool person at a bar or the train station or at a friend's party and you can wear your most stylish outfit and striking eye makeup and you will swear that they can see through all of the facade and see the lonely terribly insecure teenage girl you used to be who desperately wanted to connect and you will swear that they know that there is like an insurmountable gap between you. this will happen forever