𓆟 𓆞 𝕱𝖎𝖛𝖊𝖗𓆝 𓆝

cutie wit da long tail

they should let me listen to music while looking out the window of a train for my entire life

mr. money blocked out the sun with his factory fumes and uprooted all the trees then asked us to use our energy to work for him and our breath to advertise our labor. all his potted plants are fake cause if he had a real one he’d drink all its water then wonder why it died

the question is did i let you have it whenever you want or are my biceps bigger than your stupid cis boyfriend’s

No bc exactly

sunday’s always coming down if i’m not careful i might get a little real over coffee and a smoke 🙏

Had to get that Johnny Cash reference in there

holy shit the band reposted my post about their song who wants to shit their pants with me

“testosterone saves lives” is an undeniable fact. doctors give it to ppl with certain blood cancers so that they make more blood cells. also it makes me really hairy and fat and happy which is cool too

I can clearly remember the moment I first realised my mother and I were living on completely different planes of existence. I was 7 years old and I came home from my school's first track and field day having placed second or third in every event. the teachers had been making jokes all afternoon about how many times they had to call my name. my friends thought I was cool as shit. my enemies thought I was cool as shit too, come to think of it. I was proud as hell. so I get home with the entire front of my shirt covered in ribbons like I was a military dictator who'd awarded himself every medal, I walk into the kitchen and tell my mum all about my day, and she goes "oh, that must be disappointing not getting any firsts." and I'm like no?? first of all the first place ribbons are red and I don't like red. second of all look at me. there's literally nowhere left on my body for accolades. I am fucking Jacked of All Trades. how could this possibly be a disappointment.

why are people always spreading misinformation about elephants on the internet? "they think humans are cute, they worship the moon, they're the only mammal that can't jump," etc. you'd think we'd show the creatures that used their psychic powers to save the earth from that giant asteroid a little more respect

“I never see you at the club?” Okay? I never see you at the late night double feature picture show