Things that make me laugh

I must show all my friends

“I didn’t just pick this name, I dedicated myself to it” is so powerful.

OP change your name

No they’re right this time

Rear end it

kirby bosses after u defeat them be like my main goal is to blow up

“the game” is a sleeper agent activation phrase for anyone who was in middle school between 2006 and 2009 and apparently ppl any younger than that are blissfully unaware of the psychological warfare of the game

I’m actually glad we don’t live in an RPG world. We really take for granted being able to coexist with most animals. I don’t wanna have to pull out a longsword and beat the shit out of six crabs and two snails while a starfish snipes me with magic bullets every time I go to the beach.

So when YOU sew a bunch of unmatched parts together, it is “a quilt” and “a beautiful gift” and “will assuredly become a family heirloom” but when I sew a bunch of unmatched parts together it is “A MONSTER” and “AN ABOMINATION, AN AFFRONT TO THE GODS” and goes on “A MURDEROUS KILLING SPREE.”