ADD VIOLENCE

ok i’m going to read and go to bed early and tomorrow im going to work and meet my new boss o_0

i want to be able to get on an airplane again one day. Omg tonight i took an elevator and i hardly even had to think about it and i didn’t get dizzy at all either it was just normal to me? i went for a walk about half a mile from my house recently which is the farthest i’ve gone alone (well with my dog) in maybe ever. i think last time i freaked out alone was when i went to the book store and i couldn’t really get past the first isle but i’ll get there i believe i will. grocery stores are fine but something like target i cannot go too far from the door. walmart or god forbid costco are out of the question i have no desire to fix the walmart issue But costco calls to me at times

and not just that either but going for walks going to parks going to the library seeing my friends it really is . healing. i still love sitting in my room alone doing absolutely nothing 98% of the time but going out has been really fulfilling. after seeing my friends a weekend ago im like omg i can’t wait to do that again where we all just sit and watch a movie and do crafts or whatever. i’ve only been reading fantasy slop but i can feel a difference when im reading vs when i haven’t read in a long time. at this rate i might even be able to fix my abysmal sleep schedule one day #myabysmalsleepschedule

it’s crazy how i’m doing things like a real person now i mean im driving im going to work and college and i go to the gym and it feels good. and TRAVELING too omfg. not solo yet and truthfully idk if i’ll ever be able to travel solo but it’s fine. i was an agoraphobic shut in less than a decade ago. im still afraid to go shopping for a while alone sometimes but i just got home from SEEING ONE OF MY FAV BANDS LIVE i would’ve been throwing up having panic attacks over this just a few years ago. wow

fafsa and the college double fucked me so i’m off for the summer semester but it’s awesomeee im not worried all the time about homework