2017. What a great year! Well not really. It has its ups and downs.

It started off great. I was so happy. So in love with a woman that I actually wanted to marry in the future. Like seriously, I was so sure that I was going to marry her. (A part of me still does to this day but who cares... who knows what might happen.)

Halfway through the year, she broke up with me. To this day, I don’t know the actual reason why. Like I did everything for her. I even quit one of the two jobs I had to have more time with her. I have heard so many reasons why from “that you changed” to “because of a girl.” In which were both untrue. I wasn’t even talking to any other girl but her. If I did it was either work related or it was with my bestfriend who she has met and actually became close with. LIKE LITERALLY FUCKING CLOSE WITH. Yeah.. there are times that girls invited me to places with them but I say no and that I didn’t want to go because I had a gf at the time.

For months, I wasn’t myself always drinking.. always thinking of her.. thinking what I did wrong.. actually, to this day, I still do. Like I literally stopped talking to everyone I was close with. If anyone asked how I was doing. I just say “I’m fine.” Even if I know that they know that I am not.

But anyways, a couple months later, still depressed, I decided to go back to school because I started thinking about my own future. I didn’t want to work in a crappy server job anymore. I tried so hard in school. I actually studied a couple times too. But in the end, I failed because I couldn’t focus. I was still thinking of her. Still trying to figure out how to get her back.

I mean yeah, there was actually a time that we started talking again but stopped again because she apparently has a “special someone” that was going to meet up with her for the first time. I find out that “special someone” was a guy that she told me that I shouldn’t worry about it because she picked me and loved me. After that, I wasn’t myself even more. Like I literally changed. I didn’t want to hangout. Just work, sleep, eat, and listen to music. That’s pretty much it. I actually became depressed.

A couple weeks later, I was trying so hard to actually turn my year around. I decided to go out and try to just have fun. I went to raves. I went to bars with coworkers and friends. Almost the end of November, there was an opening for my “crappy server job” to become a shift supervisor. So I decided that I was gonna go for it and take the job. I went to an interview and a week later, I became the Shift Supervisor. And it was actually the best news. I have ever gotten in the past few months.