Okay . Lots of feelings today .
I just finished reading it and i have literally SO MANY things to address but… there’s just this one thing i can’t get off my mind .
So, let’s talk about Piper Mclean.
I’m gonna be honest, i didn’t actually read the whole Riordanverse series in order. The first book i really read was The Lost Hero - so the first characters I knew was Jason, Piper and Leo.
I eventually realized my mistake and read the PJO series first before HOO. But Jason, Piper and Leo were the ones that really stuck with me throughout the series. I first read about Piper’s crush on Jason - real, genuine crush, because at first she didn’t know that she was brainwashed, that she was tricked and used, that all her memories of Jason were fake.
And then there was the whole Heroes of Olympus thing, of course. Their bond was so… I don’t know. Like they were meant to be ,and that’s just that. I really thought that they were endgame, like one of those lovers who were just…. together. No questions asked. Even when Piper knew that her whole memory of Jason in that school was fake, she still loved him anyway. Maybe it was the fact that they could’ve died any time, or not - but she still loved him anyway. All the way until the very end of Heroes of Olympus.
And I thought that their ending scene was beautiful. They recreated the fake memory they had, about the rooftop and the stars, and now they know for sure that it’s real. I think that was really cool.
Until The Burning Maze.
I honestly get it. Piper was confused - she was no longer dying, she was no longer making last-second decisions. A few months ago she thought that she was going to die, and now she has her whole life before her. She had time. And that was when she began really considering things and trying to find out who she really was and having a whole existential crisis, basically.
Then she realizes that all this time, she’s been living up to her mom’s expectations. Hera literally matchmade her and Jason to be together because they were “a perfect couple”. And she didn’t know who she was outside all that - I think that’s the point where she started to realize her sexuality.
So, she broke up with Jason. Not because she didn’t love him, but because she really doesn’t know who she is. She didn’t want to keep living up to her mother and Hera and basically everyone else’s expectations.
And then, Jason died.
Jason died while saving Apollo, Meg and Piper. And like… can you imagine Piper’s guilt? She left him, and then he died saving him. I couldn’t imagine the things she endured after moving to Oklahoma. The days she questioned her sexuality, and wondering if the whole thing was her fault and that she shouldn’t have left him because the truth is, nobody expected Jason to die so soon, right? Nobody did. They thought that after the whole Gaea thing, they had their whole lives in front of them. But they didn’t.
I couldn’t imagine what Piper endured when she began realizing that she liked girls - what about her mother’s expectations? What about Hera’s vision of “the perfect couple”? She left Jason for herself and then he died. She must have felt guilty, selfish, all sorts of things you can imagine.
And when she started having feelings for her friend (girlfriend now), Shel - her guilt must have worsen. How could she just leave Jason like that? How could she just move on like that as if he didn’t sacrifice his life for her?
But in the end, somehow, she found her peace.
And I’m holding this whole thing so close to me right now, because this hits so close to home. Because I literally grew up with Piper, and seeing her character development go this far is just… wow.
I was in 6th grade when I first read The Lost Hero. I was twelve (and straight), and I saw Piper as the boring, straight antagonist with an ordinary character development too. I used to love Piper and Jason’s story so much because - well, I was twelve! I was straight, and I thought they were really cool.
And when Jason died in The Burning Maze (I was thirteen at that time - and bi-curious too), I was so heartbroken for Piper. I refused to really believe that Uncle Rick was going to let him die just like that. And then, I made fanfictions about how hard it would be for Piper to let go of him. And I thought that Piper was never going to move on from him and that she regrets her decision of breaking up with him - because I thought she really does love him, with or without the gods interfering with their lives. She does, of course, but I was still wrong.
I was so wrong.
No. In the end, Piper found her happiness. She found who she really was, without letting go the memory of Jason as her best friend and first love. She no longer lived under everyone else’s expectations of her - she settled in with herself, really herself. She had a girlfriend. She was proud of herself, content of herself. She was happy.
And through the course of all this, I was a lot like her, too. From being straight because I grew up believing that it was all I could be, to realizing that, oh, maybe I do like girls. Then, from being bisexual (because I thought that it would be less sinful for me if i still like men too), to being a lesbian - comfortable with myself, content with myself, and have an amazing relationship with my girlfriend - even if i’m still closeted. I’m still proud of myself for coming so far.
I think a lot of girls, wlw or not, would relate to Piper’s story, just like how I do. And I think that it would be really cool if there was a whole book focusing on Piper’s character development, too - how she coped with everything and her journey through discovering herself. She really came from being an average “not like the others” straight, Aphrodite child, to being a complex character with trauma and guilt and long achieved self-discovery.
And I think, that’s really, really cool.