“Great, good, thank you. I’m going to go through a rough time as a young man and I need you to go back in time to help me.” 

 “Uh!!!! Wow!!!!! Demiurge yes sure that’s great.” 

 “When you get back there call me Wiccan.” 

 “Wait what–”

 “Ok bye! Thank you! Bless you!” 

 And then he’s gone so she goes back in time and meets young Demiurge and his disciples and they’re all nerds and trashcans 

 And when she is kicking holes in the multiverse dragging these idiots behind her she curses her god who happens to be one of the losers she’s dragging behind her 

Ellen Page to read for Han Solo in Jason Reitman’s live stage-reading of The Empire Strikes Back [via Entertainment Weekly]

Really, there’s nothing that says “Han” can’t be a woman’s name.

Ellen Page will be taking on the part of Han Solo in director Jason Reitman’s live stage-reading of The Empire Strikes Back Thursday night, and Jessica Alba has been cast as Princess Leia.

The whole point of Reitman’s live-read series is to take classic scripts and turn them into something we’ve never seen before, but he tells EW that casting his Juno star as the sardonic captain of the Millennium Falcon felt as natural as it may seem surprising.

“In casting Han, the most important thing is: Who has the most interesting, ironic approach to life? And when I think of that, I think of Ellen Page. She’s a small human being who has the energy to fill Madison Square Garden.”

And that fact that their grudging romance will play out between two actresses …?

“Chemistry is chemistry, whether it be between a man and a woman, two women, or two men,” Reitman says. “I have no doubt that Ellen Page could have chemistry with anybody.”

The live-reads are about experimenting with perceptions and expectations, and encouraging fans to consider the story and characters in different ways — even if they’re only hearing about the performance from afar. (None have been recorded or shared. They are designed as one-night-only experiences.)

The performance of The Empire Strikes Back will take place Thursday night at the Ace Hotel Theater in downtown Los Angeles. Click here for full details on the show. Although the tickets are already sold out, there will be a stand-by list for fans who want to give it a try.

On Tuesday, Reitman announced the other members of the cast: Breaking Bad‘s Aaron Paul as Luke Skywalker) and Whiplash star J.K. Simmons as Darth Vader (and assorted others.)

But I’ll say this, look at Nat. She isn’t sure; she genuinely feels the need to ask – that’s not a playful expression like Clint’s, that’s fear. She doesn’t know if Clint will even want to associate with her anymore because she’s on a different side (or, more accurately, not on his side, because she doesn’t really pick one). That might have something to do with Clint’s expression in the first gif (only a couple frames but he looks angry – or at the very least like he’s putting a lot of effort in, but when you’re fighting the Widow I suppose you kind of need to). With what’s happened to Tony and Steve, how they genuinely seem to be willing to kill one another, how that happened with her and Clint in Avengers, she’s worried that she might be losing her best friend all over again.

The world’s bee population is in crisis and Honey Nut Cheerios is coming to the rescue, minus its perky mascot.

The brand’s latest promotion, Bring Back The Bees, characterized as a cause marketing campaign, purports to inform Canadians about the global instability of bees, due to diseases, pesticides, flowerless landscapes and monolithic crop planting, and encourage them to plant 35 million bee-enticing wildflowers this spring.

Cereal lovers will find the brand’s longtime ambassador awol for the next six weeks.

“We took Buzz off the front of the box to bring awareness to fact the bees are disappearing and on the back we have a lot of information to help consumers understand why bees are important and what they can do and then driving them to the website so they can get their free seeds,” said Amanda Hsueh, Associate Marketing Director at General Mills Canada.

Recipients are encouraged to plant the wildflower seeds “anywhere where flowers would help beautify the space and make it a bee-friendly area,” she said.

“They provide not just honey, like in our Honey Nut Cheerios, but a third of our food supply actually depends on their pollination, such as, almonds, apples and even coffee.

“So they’re very important, but the bees are in trouble. We felt like we wanted to do something to help and we wanted to find a way to make sure all Canadians could do something to help.”

USING HONEY DOES NOT HURT BEES

Using honey ensures that bees are being (well)-kept and encouraged to propagate. You have to be very careful with your bees if you want them to give you quality products. 

Using honey puts more money into the honey industry, allowing beekeepers to keep more bees as well as do more to help, protect, and save bees. 

Conversely, if you stop using honey, not only is honey going to go to waste (bees produce more honey than they need), but people who currently keep bees are going to either turn to a different product (whether because want to make money or because they just can’t afford to keep the bees they love). Their bees are going to end up neglected and/or exterminated, and there will be fewer people contributing to the desperate conservation efforts. 

Travelling for pollination, incidentally, is much harder on bees than harvesting from one location year-round.

So if vegans want to avoid bee cruelty, they should stop eating all crops pollinated by bees. Here’s a convenient list:

Kiwis, watermelons, squash, zucchini, cashews, cucumbers, apples, mangos, avocados, plums, almonds, peaches, pears, blueberries, raspberries, and blackberries.

Only buy those crops from farmers who hand-pollinate their crops, like some farms in China now have to do. Keep in mind that thin upper boughs of fruit trees are flimsy, so they send children up to pollinate the top branches. Child labour in agriculture is another complicated subject, and one that I don’t think vegans even think twice about.

“Cruelty-free” is completely impossible, and people with a poor understanding of animal welfare tend to worsen it. Research how bees actually live and how beekeeping works and realize that there is zero harm done to bees by responsibly harvesting their honey.

Bernie Sanders Seemed to Really Enjoy This Saturday Night Live Clip