Iām really tired of seeing people broken up into labels of absolutes.
People are not just āgoodā or ābadā.
People are not a list of labels.Ā
People are complex, situations are complex.
I know, that makes it a lot harder when you want to just write off everything someoneās ever done as bad ā but thatās not how people actually are, and it would do everyone good to stop pretending they are.
I am tired of hearing about the fear people have in putting themselves out there. And it is a scary thing! Putting yourself out there means subjecting yourself to people who want a really good reason to tear you down, who will jump at the first chance to feel āgoodā by labeling someone else as ābadā.
I reject this. I reject the idea that there should be fear in speaking up and talking about experiences and trying to reach an understanding of a situation.
Iām unhappy to see people spitefully urging others to cut off ties with their friends under the guise of āwell, that personās just inherently bad, so if you talk to them youāre bad too.ā That is fucked up. You definitely have the right to let the friend know you donāt want to hear about whoever troubles you, but you do not at all have the right to decide who their friends should be. This includes guilt trips.
Anyway, just try to be more aware of others. Everyone else is a person like you. They might not have the same experiences as you. They might not understand how their words are harmful, or how what theyāre doing is wrong. They certainly wonāt if you never tell them.
Most people are trying to be good, but theyāre going to mess it up sometimes. Try to keep that in mind. Even when people do really fucked up shit, sometimes they are trying to do good. āThe road to hell is paved with good intentionsā and all that.
Nothing gets solved, no growth happens when you put people into a box from which youāll never let them escape.
Yes, you absolutely must be careful about people who have tendencies and patterns that are harmful to you. Sometimes people try to overcome those patterns and they fail, and you have to distance yourself from them: that is the sad reality of life. Sometimes though, they can overcome it. But they certainly wonāt if the first thing you do is write them off after a fuck up.Ā
Be sincere.Ā Use your best judgment.
