what is melbourne boy culture?
a Melbourne boy is constantly trying to feel more unloved than he is. he is a TorturedSoul. I’m talking about arty melbourne boy. boy who aspires to go to rmit and then write for pitchfork. he wants people to know who he is but when he sees one of his competitors (another melbourne boy wearing new balance shoes who has 600 followers on insta and only posts pictures of album art) he doesn’t say hi. he wears those big headphones so no one talks to him but he hopes someone will notice him. he sees a girl wearing kookai and accuses her (internally) of dressing for the male gaze, a concept he read up on oyster…he sees another girl wearing discount universe and wonders why she can’t just wear clothes she feels comfortable in. why doesn’t she wear black? black looks good with everything right? he rides a bike. he Always Rides A Bike. he’s riding home from working at the local IGA and stops at a semi demolished building. he takes a picture with his iPhone and iMessages it to you saying “It’s kind of poetic isn’t it.” he doesn’t have his learners yet because he doesn’t want to contribute to the damage of the ozone layer. he once was a vegan but he didn’t really care about animal cruelty, it was just so he could have a convo starter with baristas whilst awaiting his soy latte. for his art finals in year 12 he did a series of photographs of the cbd at night from on top of flinders st station. he once had a band but they were awful and played a couple of gigs but you like the Facebook page anyway for support. he invites you to a dilapidated cinema on your first date and he says he likes to “hang out here. with friends or alone.” massive poster of kubricks’ lolita on his wall and you stare at it while he makes you an instant coffee and then u realise you’re with a melbourne boy again….time to move cities
this post is absolutely outstanding
I can’t bear to read this post anymore because it’s too much
