genshin . 9k followers atm, sfw and sagau writer, gender-neutral and appearance-neutral reader fics (only 5% fics contains fem!reader), requests are closed atm but inbox is open for brainrots and convos :>
status . a college student ready for her doom šØ
schedule . indefinite hiatus due to personal life :((
member of @/astronetwrk
INTRODUCTORY ā !
about me
carrd.co (pls read for byf / byi)
mutuals
INFORMATION ā !
masterlist
taglist info
tagging system
LOVELY THINGS ā !
househusband au
evermore series
weaved series
writing tips
farewell, love. (angstober collab event)
RECENT WORKS ā !
01 - missing you (neuvillette x gn!reader)
02 - in a world of boys, heās a gentleman! (various x gn!reader)
03 - my love, mine, all mine (various x gn!reader)
04 - next time (alhaitham x reader)
05 - this time (alhaitham x reader)
SOMETHING TO SHARE !
please respect my time and my feelings. that is the one thing i ask from you and in return, you have my gratitude. iām a friendly person so i welcome all people unless theyāre a part of my dni list :DDD
i donāt ship traveler x character. although i did mention some of the ships in my old fics for the plot, i used to have an assumption that traveler was old enough to be with said character!
ADVENTURERSā TEAM !
feel free to send an ask to join the anon squad (w/ a nickname youād like to use)
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SYNOPSIS (of part). In this fourth life, life was much kinder and happier to you. Born in the region of songs and wind, you're a shy librarian assistant in the Knights of Favonius' Library, preferring books over people. However, when tasked by Lisa to talk to people and collect their borrowed books, you happen to encounter an extinguished gentleman.
PAIRING. diluc ragnvindr x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, fluff, mentions of illness, major character death, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 3560 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
Unlike your other lives, this one did not begin with prophecy, blood, or brilliance.
It began with dust.
Fine motes of it drifted through the air of the Knights of Favonius Library, illuminated by tall windows and gentle afternoon light. The scent of parchment and ink clung to your clothes more faithfully than any perfume ever could. Your days passed between shelves and ledgers, between the careful turning of pages and the quiet satisfaction of returning books to their rightful places.
It was peaceful.
You liked it that way.
While others sought glory as knights, adventurers, or bards beneath Mondstadtās open sky, you found fulfillment in silence. Stories lived more vividly in your mind than they ever could beyond the city walls. Heroes, dragons, ancient godsāyou met them all through books, safe and sound, with a cup of tea growing cold beside you.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Or so you thought.
āReading again?ā
You startled, nearly dropping the book in your hands as a familiar, amused voice chimed behind you.
āMāMiss Lisa!ā you blurted, snapping the book shut far too quickly. āI didnāt realize you wereā!ā
āLisa, darling,ā she corrected with a laugh, leaning casually over the desk beside you. āIf you keep calling me āmiss,ā I might actually start to feel ancient.ā
You flushed, fingers tightening around the bookās spine. āSāsorryā¦ā
Her eyes flicked down to what you had been reading. āNow,ā she said lightly, āwhat sort of story managed to steal your soul so thoroughly that you didnāt notice your dear old friend approaching?ā
You hesitated, then slid the book toward her. āItās⦠an old journal. Written by an adventurer.ā
Lisaās brows lifted in recognition as she leaned closer. āOh? This one?ā Her smile softened. āI remember this. I found this old thing back when I studied at the Akademiya and managed to find a copy of it to bring it here. It was certainly one of the earliest attempts to document Teyvatās creatures in detail.ā
You nodded, brushing your thumb over the worn leather cover. āIt was one of the first books I ever read. I keep⦠coming back to it.ā
āI can tell,ā Lisa teased gently. āYou always do have a sentimental streak.ā
Then, with the unmistakable tone of someone about to ask for trouble, she straightened. āI need a favor.ā
Your stomach sank immediately.
āI have a lunch engagement I absolutely cannot miss,ā Lisa continued breezily. āNormally, Iād be the one reminding borrowers about overdue booksābut since youāre the only other librarian, Iāll need you to handle it today.ā
You stared at her.
āā¦You mean,ā you said carefully, āgo outside?ā
āYes.ā
āAnd talk to people?ā
āCorrect.ā
She grinned wickedly. āSocialize!āĀ
You were doomed.
And so, by sunset, you found yourself wandering Mondstadt with a list clutched in your hands, heart pounding each time you asked a stranger for books that they borrowed. One by one, you found the namesāuntil only one remained.
The last led you somewhere you dreaded.
Angelās Share.
The tavern was loud, warm, and overwhelmingly alive. Laughter spilled from every table, mugs clinked, and the smell of alcohol made your nose wrinkle instinctively. You kept your head down, weaving carefully through the crowd.
You tapped the nearest man at the counter. āEāexcuse me, have you seenāā
āHah?ā He spun around, eyes glassy. āWhatāre you pokinā me for?ā
āIāIām sorry, I was justāā
āWhatās that got to do with me?!ā he snapped.
You stumbled back. āIām sorry! Iāll justāā
You collided with something solid.
Strong.
Warm.
You gasped, spinning around in panicāonly to freeze.
A tall man stood behind you, crimson hair catching the tavernās light like embers. His gaze was sharp, unyielding, fixed squarely on the drunk man before you.
āWhat seems to be the problem?ā
The voice was calm. Cold. Cutting.
The drunk sobered instantly, muttering excuses before retreating into the crowd.
You exhaled shakily. āI-Iām sorry,ā you rushed, holding up the list. āI was just looking for someone.ā
The red-haired man glanced at the paper without taking it. āā¦They donāt live in the city.ā
You blinked. āā¦Oh.ā
āTheyāre in Springvale,ā he added. āThatās why you couldnāt find them.ā
Your shoulders sagged in relief and embarrassment all at once. āThat explains it⦠Thank you.ā
He checked the time. āYou should go home. Itās late.ā
You followed his gaze, startled. āOhā! Youāre right! I should just visit them tomorrow morning.ā You bowed quickly. āThank you again, mister! Have a good night!ā
You fled before your nerves could betray you further.
It wasnāt until you returned to the libraryāLisa fussing over youāthat you learned his name.
āDiluc Ragnvindr,ā she said knowingly. āHeās the owner of Dawn Winery and operates Angelās Share. Though if you ask me, Iād recommend you talk to someone who knows more about him than I do.ā
You pretended not to care.
Later that night, halfway home, a familiar voice stopped you.
āYou dropped this.ā
You turnedāand there he was, holding your list.Ā
āOh!ā Your face lit up as you took it. āThank you, Mister Diluc! I didnāt even know I lost it!ā
He made no change of expression. āā¦Just Diluc,ā he corrected, āand it's fine. I only happened to find it when I was closing the tavern.ā He said.Ā
You smiled shyly.Ā
And so, he walked you home without another word, steps steady beside yours. It was strange, but you didnāt reject him as you let him walk with you. The silence was something you appreciated from him, as your social battery had already drained down from the amount of people youāve approached for your errand.Ā
But as soon as you finally closed your door, heart racing, cheeks warm after saying goodbye to the red-haired gentleman, you thought to yourself, āmaybe going out wasnāt so bad.āĀ
If your first meeting with Diluc Ragnvindr had been brief and startling, then every meeting after that was⦠quiet.
Not awkwardāno, never that. Just quiet in a way that felt deliberate, as if the world itself lowered its voice whenever the two of you happened to occupy the same space.
At first, they were coincidences.
You saw him early one morning while sweeping fallen leaves near the library steps. He passed by without stopping, coat fastened neatly, expression composed as ever. You lifted your head just in time to catch his gaze flicker toward you.
āā¦Good morning,ā you murmured, barely louder than the rustle of leaves.
āGood morning,ā he replied, voice low, measured.
That was all. He walked on, boots echoing softly against the stone.
Yet your heart lingered in that moment long after he disappeared from view.
Another time, you were crouched not too far from the Knightsā headquarters, breaking bits of bread for the stray dogs that lingered there. They wagged their tails eagerly, noses nudging your hands as you laughed under your breath.
āYouāll spoil them,ā a familiar voice said behind you.
You startled, nearly dropping the bread. āO-Ohā!ā
Diluc stood a few steps away, arms crossed loosely, gaze fixed not on youābut on the dogs.
āThey deserve it,ā you said timidly, offering a piece to the boldest one.
āā¦I suppose they do,ā he conceded.
He stayed without saying anything more. The dogs eventually grew brave enough to approach him too, sniffing his boots before retreating.
You glanced up at him, your smile growing. āThey like you.ā
He huffed quietly. āI doubt that.ā
āThey do,ā you insisted softly. āAnimals can tell.ā
Something unreadable passed through his eyes then. He nodded once, as if accepting a truth he hadnāt expected.
After that, you began noticing him everywhere.
At the market, standing silently while vendors greeted him with respect. At the plaza during quiet afternoons, watching Mondstadt from the edges rather than its center. Sometimes, when you were shelving books near the windows, you swore you could spot a flash of red hair outsideāonly for it to vanish the moment you looked properly.
You never chased him. Never waved. Never forced conversation.
And neither did he.
But slowly, inevitably, silence became something shared.
When you passed him on the street, there would be a nod. A pause. Sometimes, a single sentence.
āHow is the library?ā
āQuiet today.ā
āā¦Good.ā
That was enough.
Weeks turned into months.
Sometimes, he would walk you homeānot always speaking, just matching your pace every time. The night air would be cool, lanterns glowing softly, your steps syncing naturally.
āThank you,ā youād say at your door.
āRest well,ā heād reply.
You would linger, fingers curled against the hem of your sleeves, wishingājust a littleāthat heād say more.
You never asked.
Neither did he.
And yet somehow, you began to fall in love.
It wasnāt sudden as there was no dramatic moment nor a realization that struck like lightning unlike the books youāve read. It was much quieter than that, if not gentler.Ā
It was the way he noticed when you shivered and wordlessly removed his coat to put it around your shoulders. The way he remembered your favorite drink without being told. The way his presence alone made the city feel less overwhelming.
For Diluc, it was similar.
You were calm where his world was sharp. Gentle where his nights were violent. You never asked too much about anything, never pried into his life. You listened when he spoke, and respected his silence just as much.
One evening, as you walked together beneath the stars, you finally spoke what had been hovering between you for months.
āā¦Would you like to come in?ā You asked quietly, standing at your door. āFor tea.ā
He hesitated.
āā¦If you donāt mind, then yes.ā
That night, words came slowly, but they came. You spoke of books, of your childhood, of how you preferred stories to reality. He spoke of responsibility, of Mondstadt, of handling his business while also trying to do his part in protecting Mondstadt.
When he reached for your handāhis hand warm and comfortingāit felt inevitable.Ā
Your relationship bloomed softly through shared mornings, late-night conversations, gentle touches. Laughter whispered rather than shouted. Love that felt like coming home.
And time passed like a dream.
Eventually, you two married beneath Mondstadtās open sky. It was simple, yet heartfelt. Lisa cried openly. Kaeya smiled knowingly. Diluc held your hands as if letting go was unthinkable.
Since then, the two of you have gotten closer than ever.
There were mornings where you would force him to eat breakfast before the two of you could leave for work, much to his resignation, and evenings where he would return to find you waiting by the fireplace with a book in hand despite the late hour.
"You're still awake."
You looked up from your book immediately. "You're late."
"...Work."
"I know." You smiled softly. "Welcome home, Diluc."
He would never admit it aloud, but those two words quickly became his favorite in the world.
You accompanied him through grape fields during harvest seasons, sat beside him during paperwork just to keep him company, and filled Dawn Winery's halls with warmth that had been absent for years. The servants adored you, with Adelinde often remarking that the manor had finally begun feeling alive again.
Eventually, your quiet life became filled with countless little routines that belonged only to the two of you.
Reading together in silence by the fireplace.
Waiting for him after his late-night ventures as the Darknight Hero with bandages already prepared (you later found out about his secret when he came home late at night one time with a few bruises that certainly didnāt belong to any reckless drunkards).Ā
Taking walks around Mondstadt after closing hours.
Listening to you ramble excitedly about books and creatures while he listened with more attention than he ever gave to anything else.
Three years passed like that.
Three peaceful years.
Three happy years.
Diluc had spent so much of his life surrounded by grief and responsibility that he had forgotten what peace felt like until you arrived.
Home stopped being Dawn Winery.
Home became wherever you were.
Until, something changed.Ā
It started small with youāfatigue that lingered too long, dizziness that came too often. Diluc noticed before you did. He always did.
āYouāre having a fever again,ā he said one morning, concern etched deep into his voice as he placed a hand against your forehead.Ā
āIām fine,ā you insisted.
But you werenāt.
The doctorās visit was quiet. Too quiet. Diluc had been insisting on his visit after noting that itās already been more than a week since you started getting more tired and sick.Ā
āā¦Iām sorry,ā the physician said eventually, eyes heavy. āThereās nothing more we can do.ā
From the moment the physician left your chambers, Diluc did not leave your side.
He did not step into the night as the Darknight Hero. He did not come to his office. He did not visit Angelās Share. The world beyond your bed might as well have ceased to exist.
You needed him.Ā
He sat beside you through the long hours when sleep refused to come, your breaths shallow and uneven. When pain stole your strength, he held your hand and whispered reassurances he wasnāt sure you could still hear. He learned the rhythm of your suffering with the way your fingers twitched before the ache set in, the way your brow furrowed when it became too much, and the way you looked so pained.Ā
He wanted nothing more than to take your pain away and bear it himself if it meant he got to see you happy and healthy again.Ā
āIām here,ā he would murmur, again and again, as if repetition could anchor you to the world.
āI wonāt go anywhere.ā
āYouāre not alone.ā
Sometimes you smiled faintly at him, eyes glassy but warm. Other times, you simply stared at the ceiling, exhaustion weighing heavier than words.
On the nights when your fever worsened, he pressed cool towels to your forehead, his hands trembling despite himself. He had faced abyss mages, Fatui agents, and monsters born of shadow without fearābut this helplessness hollowed him out in ways no enemy ever could.
āI should have noticed sooner,ā he whispered once, voice breaking in the quiet room.
āYou always notice,ā you replied weakly, forcing a smile. āThis⦠isnāt something we can fix.ā
He squeezed his eyes shut at that.
Days blurred into one another. You grew lighter in his arms, thinner, fragile as parchment. You no longer had the strength to leave the bed. Even speaking costs you more than it once had.
Yet your mind remained sharp.
One afternoon, sunlight filtering through the curtains, you asked him to open the window. The breeze carried the distant sounds of Mondstadtālaughter, bells, life.
āI used to think,ā you murmured, āthat I was boring.ā
Diluc frowned. āNever.ā
āI didnāt go on adventures. I didnāt fight monsters. I just⦠read.ā
āYou built worlds,ā he said quietly. āYou lived a thousand lives through books.ā
You smiled, eyes drifting toward the shelf across the room.
āDo you remember the journal?ā you asked. āThe adventurer who recorded the creatures of Teyvat?ā
āYes.ā
āI always felt⦠connected to them,ā you continued. āLike they were speaking to me. Like⦠thereās something about them that made me feel like I know them.āĀ
Diluc brushed your hair back gently. āYou donāt have to think about that now.ā
āI want to.ā You insisted softly. āPromise me something.ā
āā¦Anything.ā
āWhen this is over,ā you whispered, ādonāt lock yourself away. Donāt drown in work. Donāt burn yourself out at night.ā
He swallowed. āI wonāt.ā
āYou will.ā You breathed. āSo⦠You should travel. See the world. I know youāve done it before and youāre not allowed to come to Snezhnaya, but⦠I think traveling will do you good.ā
His voice shook. āWeāll go together.ā
You looked at him thenātruly looked at himāwith a sadness so deep it hurt to witness.
āā¦You know I canāt.ā
Silence fell heavy between you.
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against yours. āThen Iāll go,ā he whispered. āAnd Iāll tell you everything when I come back.ā
You exhaled softly, content. āā¦Iād like that.ā
That night, your breathing slowed.
Diluc noticed immediately.
āHey,ā he said quietly, sitting upright. āStay with me.ā
Your eyes fluttered open, unfocused. You smiled faintly.
āDilucā¦ā
āIām here.ā
āThank you,ā you whispered. āFor choosing me.ā
Tears slipped down his cheeks before he could stop them. āThere was never a choice. Itās always been you.ā
Your hand slackened in his grasp.
And just like thatā
You were gone.
The scream that tore from his chest never left the room.
The funeral passed like a nightmare he couldnāt wake from.
Flowers, condolences, soft voicesāall meaningless. The city mourned quietly, respectfully. Everyone came. Everyone cried, most especially Lisa, your dearest friend who had watched you bloom and love like no other.Ā
Kaeya stood near Diluc, watching, observing, but never spoke a word.Ā
Diluc stood still.
Unmoving.
That night, he returned to your chambers alone.
The bed was cold. Too large.
He sat where you used to read, staring at the bookshelf until his gaze landed on the familiar, worn journal. With shaking hands, he picked it up.
The journal was your āsomething oldā given by Lisa on your wedding day. He remembered rushing to your assigned room before the wedding worriedly when he heard your sobs and cries, only to relax when he realized they were tears of joy. He knew how much the book meant to you, how it stayed with you throughout your childhood to adulthood.Ā
And now, the journal became your memory.Ā
Diluc did not sleep that night.
He sat in the armchair beside the bookshelf until dawn threatened the horizon, the adventurerās journal heavy in his hands. Candle wax pooled uselessly on the table; he hadnāt noticed when the flame burned low, or when it finally died.
Page after page, he read.
The handwriting was neat but lively, filled with curiosity that bled through every careful line. Notes about creaturesātheir habits, their calls, the way they reacted to kindness rather than force. Small personal remarks slipped between observations.
Day by day, I grew eager to finish this book and come back to my home. My dear readers, if I can find my own home, then so can you.Ā
Dilucās throat tightened.
Finally, he reached the final entryāthe one that was cut off abruptly, mid-thought, as if the writer had been pulled away before they could finish. The last page was the publisher informing about how the original journal was found in Snezhnaya in the writerās campsite that had most of their things, and it seemed they had died from an illness before they could complete it.Ā
He then turned the page, and his breath immediately caught.Ā
The illustration greeted him in silence.
It was not identical. It shouldnāt have been. The clothes were unfamiliar, the setting foreign, the era wrong.
But the eyesā
Dilucās fingers trembled as they traced the page.
The shape of the eyes. The softness of the smile that seemed to carry both wonder and melancholy. The way curiosity shone through the drawing as if the artist had captured a soul rather than a face.
His breath hitched.
āNoā¦ā he whispered.
The author⦠looks like you.Ā
The resemblance was undeniable. Subtle enough that a stranger might dismiss it, but Diluc was no stranger. He knew every expression you woreāevery smile you tried to hide, every thoughtful gaze when you were lost in a book.
āThis isnāt possible,ā he said hoarsely, though the words rang hollow.
Memories resurfaced unbiddenāyour fascination with this journal, the way you spoke of the adventurer as if they were someone you missed. The longing in your voice when you spoke of lands you had never seen.
Or perhaps⦠had.
His attention remained fixed on the page, heart pounding as a single thought took root.
ONE WEEK LATER
Jean adjusted the papers on her desk, exhaustion evident in the tight set of her jaw. Reports had been piling up far too quickly for the past few daysātoo many incidents, too many unsettling patterns.
Her gaze paused on one document in particular.
Fatui activity increasing near Dawn Winery.
She frowned.
It was unusual. The winery was well-guarded, discreet, andāuntil recentlyāof little strategic interest to the Fatui. Yet sightings had surged. Scouts reported unfamiliar agents lingering near the outskirts. Some claimed they had seen figures near the vineyard at odd hours, always vanishing before they could be confronted.
Jean exhaled slowly.
āā¦This timing,ā she murmured.
She reached for another report.
Unidentified individual observed near a civilian grave. Repeated visits. No signs of theft or vandalism. Purpose unknown.
Her grip tightened.
She stood abruptly, chair scraping softly against the floor. She knew who to talk to.Ā
Outside, the wind stirred the trees of Mondstadtāgentle, mourning.
Far beyond the city walls, near the quiet resting place beneath the shade of old oaks, the air felt wrong. Too still. Too watchful.
Boots pressed into the earth where flowers had been laid not long ago.
A gloved hand hovered above a grave, not touchingānever touching.
āSo this was the life that took you,ā a voice murmured, amused and contemplative all at once.
āPeaceful,ā the man mused. āAlmost boring.āĀ
He straightened, coat rustling softly. āBut no matter. I shall find you again.āĀ
Somewhere nearby, Dawn Winery stood tall and silentāits master unaware that forces long buried were once again circling something precious.
The grave remained undisturbed.
For now.
And far away, a cycle tightened its gripāpatient, inevitable, and cruel.
AAHHH THE MYSTERY CONTINUESS!! And I was right! Fatui are involved š
Not only that. In the masterlist I noticed Dottore is one of the ⦠love ⦠interests⦠so could it be the protagonist was his lover before they met Zhongli as the adventurer? Does that mean Dottore had been involved in the creation of the reincarnation cycle so that he may meet us again. Yet the protagonist falls inlove with another before he could find them, leading to our death. Almost definitely inflicted by the fatui.
Also, Neuvilettes story has been my favourite so far, I forgot to mention that before. The angst is so delicious.
I assume chapter 6 will be something to tie up the ends, not focused on any individual character romance routes.
i waited until the last part is released so i can reply to this HAHHAA š
i love your take and itās close to what i had planned (too close that i was clutching my pearls when i read it coz ru a psychic or what) ! im glad you enjoyed the story + neuvilletteās part <33
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this life, you're an ordinary researcher and journalist who started having dreams that felt all too real and familiar, ranging from a large winery and vineyard in Mondstadt to the harsh embrace of winter in Snezhnaya, each dream including different men whose faces you couldn't see nor recognize.
PAIRING/S. dottore x gn!reader, zhongli x gn!reader
CONTENT. VERY ANTICLIMATIC, fluff, mentions of experiments, traveler goes by they/them, dottore is a warning itself, VERY ooc and potential grammar errors! (this was written before luna vii!)
WORD COUNT. 4183 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE
In this life, youāre a renowned researcher and journalist who seeks truths and stories worth telling.Ā
Your current life was, by all appearances, ordinary enough: long days spent between trapping yourself in your humble home writing a new article, whatever fieldwork your latest assignment demanded, quiet evenings with tea gone cold beside stacks of notes, and the steady comfort of routines you had built for yourself one careful habit at a time.Ā
You had work, a reputation, and a life that made sense on paper, even if it often felt a little too quiet when the day was done.Ā
Then, you started having specific dreams.Ā
At first, they were easy to dismiss.
Everyone dreamed, after all.
Some people dreamed of falling. Others dreamed of flying. Some dreamed of places they had never seen or conversations they had never had, only to wake up and laugh at the absurdity of it all before continuing on with their lives.
You dreamed of something akin to memories that did not belong to you.Ā
You dreamed of lanterns floating above a harbor bathed in gold as a man with amber eyes stood beside you and spoke with a patience that made centuries feel insignificant.Ā
You dreamed of arguments inside a library so vast that it felt endless, where green eyes watched you with equal parts exasperation and fondness while books and notes were scattered across every available surface.
You dreamed of rain tapping softly against windows as carefully written letters rested in your lap, the elegant handwriting upon them somehow more familiar than your own.
You dreamed of vineyards stretching endlessly beneath Mondstadt's skies, of firelight dancing across wooden floors, of a home that smelled faintly of grapes and wine and cedarwood.
And sometimesā
you dreamed of snow.
Not the gentle, beautiful snow, but the cold, suffocating snow that buried the world beneath white silence while somewhere in the distance a pair of crimson eyes watched you with a terrifying sort of patience.
Those were the dreams that always woke you, left your heart racing and your hands trembling beneath your blankets long after morning arrived.
As one of Teyvat's most respected journalists and natural researchers, perhaps you should have been fascinated.
Instead, you were afraid.
Because dreams should fade.
Yours only became clearer.
You knew the streets of Fontaine before ever stepping foot into the nation.
You knew exactly how many steps led toward a particular archive inside the Akademiya despite never having visited it before.
You knew the taste of Osmanthus wine despite never drinking it.
You knew the sound the rain in Fontaine made against the windows of the Palais Mermonia.
You knew the exact location of a hidden trail near Dawn Winery.
And perhaps most troubling of allā
you knew creatures that modern records insisted had never existed at all.
It was your work that eventually led you to the Akademiya.
Ironically enough, it was also your work that led you directly toward the beginning of everything.
The book had already become something of a legend among scholars, adventurers, and natural researchers alike. Few texts documented Teyvat's wildlife with such precision and care. Even fewer managed to capture the personality of every creature they encountered rather than merely listing their behaviors and habitats like specimens pinned beneath glass.
The author had written as though every fox, every bird, every Vishap and fungus and tiger possessed a story worth telling.
The author wrote as though understanding something was impossible without first loving it.
The book had become required reading in certain Akademiya courses because of its accuracy alone.
You bought your own copy on the second day, then another for annotation purposes.
Eventually you found yourself reading it late into the night.
Then rereading it.
Then memorizing passages without meaning to.
Because the more you read, the less it felt like studying a strangerās work and the more it felt like standing too close to something you were never meant to find.
The notes were too intimate for a simple field journal. They lingered on small mercies, on the way a creatureās breathing changed when it was frightened, on the exact moment curiosity outweighed fear, on the quiet sort of patience that turned observation into care. There was warmth in the margins, in the pauses between facts, in the way the author seemed unable to keep themselves from noticing beauty even while trying to remain objective.
And somewhere along the way, that tenderness began to feel unsettling.
Not because it was wrong, but because it felt familiar.
The book ended abruptly in Snezhnaya.
The final pages detailed snow foxes and mountain beasts and birds adapted to survive impossible winters before suddenly stopping altogether.
No final chapter, no farewell, nor an authorās final note.Ā
Only the publisher's note attached to the very end.
The author's manuscript was discovered abandoned near an old campsite deep within Snezhnaya's wilderness following reports of their death due to illness.
The body itself had never been recovered.
Only the journal remained.
The final page also contained an illustration commissioned by the publisher using older descriptions and surviving sketches found among the author's belongings.
You stared at the image for a very long time.
The face wasn't yours.
And yetā
it wasn't entirely unfamiliar either.
The eyes looked wrong.
The hairstyle was different.
The clothes belonged to another era entirely.
But there was something undeniably familiar about the expression staring back at you from the page.
Enough to make your chest tighten
Enough to make you close the book.
And enough to make you stop sleeping entirely.
The dreams only worsened after that, to the point where instead of dreamingā
You started remembering.
You remembered standing beside the harbor in Liyue while lanterns drifted into the sky.
"I am a patient person."
You woke with tears in your eyes.
The following night brought another.
Books.
Arguments.
Green eyes narrowing at you from across a table.
"I want you to succeed. Just not like this."
Another.
Rain against marble.
Letters folded carefully by hand.
Blue eyes watching you from the audience.
Another.
Firelight.
Warmth.
A quiet voice beside a fireplace.
"Welcome home."
You stopped sleeping after that.
The Traveler found you in Sumeru shortly afterward.Ā
Though āfoundā was perhaps too simple a word for it; the two of you first crossed paths during one of your research excursions beyond the city, when a routine investigation into local wildlife and unusual environmental disturbances happened to overlap with whatever errand had brought them to the Akademiyaās outskirts.Ā
What began as a brief exchange of information quickly turned into a longer conversation than either of you had expected, especially once you realized that the Traveler knew far more about the places in your dreams than any stranger reasonably should.Ā
By the time you parted ways, you had already agreed to share notes, and from there the acquaintance deepened into something steadier.
Which brings you to the present.Ā
"You look terrible," Paimon blurted out immediately, floating around you to check up on you.Ā
You smiled tiredly. "...Thank you."
"I wasn't trying to be mean!"
The Traveler studied you carefully. "You haven't been sleeping."
You hesitated, then sighed. "I know things I shouldn't know."
Paimon tilted her head. "Like what?"
You looked down at your hands.
"I know the exact number of steps leading toward the western archives in the House of Daena."
"...Okay?"
"I know where a hidden cave near Dragonspine is located despite never going there."
The Traveler remained silent.
"And I know someone named Zhongli promised me he'd wait for me."
Neither of them spoke.
Because unlike youā
they knew that name.
Eventually the Traveler asked quietly,
"Have you ever met him before?"
"No."
You paused.
"...At least I don't think I have."
The encounter happened days later.
You saw him before he saw you.
Or perhapsā
before he allowed you to realize he had already seen you.
You almost thought that was the Zhongli in your dreams.Ā
Before you could approach him, you stopped when a thought occurred to you.Ā
Snow.
Chains.
Laboratories.
A locked room.
The smell of antiseptic.
The sound of rain against metal.
Your knees buckled.
The Traveler caught you immediately.
"Heyā!"
You stared at the man standing across the street.
No.
Not a man.
Something worse.
Something your body remembered long before your mind did.
Recognition flickered in crimson eyes.
"...What a coincidence." You hear him speak, facing your direction at last.
Your breathing stopped.
You knew that voice.
You knew those eyes.
You knew that smile.
"Dottore."
The name escaped your lips without permission.
For the first timeā
he smiled.
The next few moments passed in chaos.
Fatui soldiers appeared seemingly from nowhere.
The Traveler drew their weapon.
Paimon shouted something you didn't hear.
You panicked as chaos ensued, with Dottore coming closer and closer as youāre all surrounded.Ā
And thenā
Nahida appeared.
The rest was nothing but a blur. You remembered running with the Traveler and Paimon after Nahida ordered you to do so, running through the forests to get away from a man who you had never met.Ā
And yet, your entire consciousness, your entire body are screaming at you to get away from him as far as possible, as if you really knew him.Ā
When safety finally came, the three of you eventually met Nahida again in a different and safer location.Ā
But not without discovering important information.Ā
āI was able to make him go away, but only for a while.ā The archon spoke. āI immediately assumed that he came back to Sumeru again for trouble, but⦠It seems itās much worse than I thought.āĀ
She looked at you with something that resembled sorrow, as if she had learned something from her encounter with Dottore.Ā
"...He changed something he never should have touched."
You looked up, wondering why she had looked at you when she said those words.Ā
"What do you mean?"
Nahida hesitated, then spoke softly, "There is no easy way to say this, but⦠Dottore did something to youāto your life.ā
Your eyes widen slightly, a pang hitting your heart.Ā
ā...What do you mean?ā You asked, dreading to hear her answer.Ā
Ā Nahida thought about her answer more, trying to think of a better way to gently reveal it.Ā
ā...He tied your life to Irminsul."
The room fell silent.
The Traveler's expression shifted first, confusion giving way to alarm.
"...Tied their life?"
Nahida nodded once.
"Not in the way most people are born into the world. This was deliberate, one that involves modification. Itās as if he made a wound in the tree's memory and then hidden it so deeply that even the world itself kept trying to correct it."
You stared at her.
Your throat felt too tight to speak.
You briefly recall the traveler telling you about Irminsul when they told you about their adventure back when they first arrived in Sumeru, so you knew that whatever Dottore did to you, it was this serious.Ā
It was hard to grasp it.Ā
ā...I-I donāt understand.ā You stammered. āI havenāt even met Dottore. I donāt recall seeing him except in my dreamsāāĀ
You then paused for a moment.Ā
Could it be that these dreams are more than just?Ā
As if reading your mind, Nahida's gaze lowered for a moment before lifting again, gentler now, but no less grave.
"Your dreams may be memories from the past.ā Nahida theorized. āBut all Dottore told me is this: every time you died, Irminsul simply wrote you back into existence."
The Traveler went still.
"...Reincarnation?"
Nahida shook her head.
"No."
Her expression darkened, and for the first time since you had met her, there was something cold in her voice.
"Repetition."
The word settled over you like a blade.
Not reincarnation.
Not a blessing.
Not fate.
A loop.
A cruel, deliberate loop that had been forced upon you by someone who had decided your life was something to be studied, adjusted, and repeated until it suited him.
Nahida watched you carefully, as though she could see the moment the grief inside you hardened into something sharper.
"After hearing Dottoreās explanation, I decided to look deeper into Irminsulās records and found traces of the alteration," she admitted quietly. "At first, it seemed like a distortion caused by time, but the pattern was too precise. Too intentional. Dottore had not merely observed your lives, but rather arranged them."
The Traveler's jaw tightened.
āHe tampered with the Irminsul to make them not be able to pass on?āĀ
Nahida gave a small, grim nod.
"Yes. He left marks in places he should never have been able to reach. Of course, itās not enough to destroy the tree's memoryāhe made sure to force it into a cycle. Itās enough to make your endings unstable and your beginnings repeat."
Your hands curled into fists.
"So he did this to me."
Nahida's expression softened, but she did not lie.
"Yes."
The word hurt more than you expected.Not because you had not already suspected it.
Because hearing it spoken aloud made it real.
The Traveler stepped closer to you then, voice low and careful.
"Can it be fixed?"
Nahida looked toward the window, toward the distant branches of Irminsul that no ordinary eye could see.
"I believe so," she said. "But if we want to undo what he did, we need to go to the source. Irminsul itself has to be shown the truth of what was changed."
You swallowed.
"Then we go."
Nahida turned back to you.
There was no hesitation in her eyes now, only resolve.
"Yes," she said. "We go together."
The decision came in pieces.
In the Traveler's quiet promise that they would help you reclaim what had been stolen.
In Nahida's determination to face the wound Dottore had left behind, no matter how deep it ran.
In your own voice, shaking only once before steadying, when you said that if your life had been forced into a cage of repetition, then you wanted out.
You wanted your endings back.
You wanted your choices back.
You wanted every life that had been taken from you to finally belong to you again.
And so, when you finally stood before Irminsul itself, the memories of your past lives began to surface at last.Ā
It wasnāt the usual vague impressions or half-formed dreams youāve had.Ā
Instead, it came as everything all at once.Ā
The life beneath Liyue's lanterns, where amber eyes and quiet promises waited beside the harbor.Ā
The life in Sumeru, where green eyes argued with you over books and knowledge until the hours slipped away unnoticed.Ā
The life in Fontaine, where rain tapped against tall windows and carefully folded letters carried words you had once treasured.Ā
The life at Dawn Winery, where vineyards stretched beneath Mondstadt's skies and firelight warmed a home that had felt like it would last forever.Ā
And of course, your devastating fate in Snezhnaya, where snow fell endlessly and crimson eyes watched from the white silence with a patience that had always felt too heavy to name.Ā
You remembered every name you had ever answered to, every face that had once smiled at you across a lifetime, every promise made beneath lantern light or rain or snow, every grief you had buried so deeply that it had become part of your bones.Ā
You remembered the warmth of hands you had long since lost, the sound of voices calling for you from worlds that no longer existed, the ache of watching centuries pass while carrying the weight of people who had loved you in different ages and different forms.Ā
You remembered joy so vivid it hurt, sorrow so old it had turned quiet, and the terrible, unbearable truth that you had not simply dreamed these livesāyou had lived them, over and over again, until the sum of all those memories became too heavy to bear.Ā Ā
In that moment, the decision to purge yourself in Irminsul felt less like a choice than a necessity.
"I want it to end."
Nahida looked at you.
"And do you understand what that entails?"
You nodded.
"No more cycles."
No more waking up as someone else.
No more forgetting.
No more unfinished goodbyes.
No more becoming someone Dottore could chase forever.
The Traveler stepped closer.
"...Are you sure?"
You smiled sadly.
"I think I've lived enough lives for one person. It's time for me to purge myself if it means bringing peace."
But Nahida knew there's another choice.Ā
You did not need to erase your existence nor your memories.Ā
"I think what you can do is to erase only the experiment." Nahida suggested thoughtfully.Ā
It was there when she started mentioning the chains Dottore had forced around your soul, explaining everything carefully.
Irminsul remembered everything recorded within the world.
Dottore had taken advantage of that.
Using forbidden research and knowledge he never should have possessed, he had essentially convinced Irminsul that your existence was unfinished.
Incomplete.
Something that needed correcting.
And so every time you diedā
the world simply rewrote you back into existence.
Not the same person.
Not the same memories.
But always you.
Always close enough for Dottore to find and to try again.
The solution was simple in theory.
Terrifying in practice.
The connection had to be severed.
Not your existence.
Not your memories.
Only the foreign thread tying your soul back to Irminsul's roots.
Suddenly, Nahida held your hand, her small fingers warm and steady against yours as she looked up at you with a sadness far older than her face should have carried.Ā
āYou should not have to purge yourself from Irminsul to fix everything,ā she said softly, her voice gentle but unwavering.Ā
āIt is not worth losing every precious memory people have of you. Your laughter, your kindness, the moments they shared with youāthose matter. You matter. We will find another way.āĀ
For a long moment, you said nothing, the weight of everything you had been ready to sacrifice pressing against your chest until it hurt.Ā
Then, slowly, the fight drained out of you. If there was another path, one that did not demand your disappearance from the hearts of everyone who loved you, then perhaps you could bear to take it.Ā
With a shaky breath, you gave in and accepted her alternative at last.
The process took hours, but you trust Nahida to complete it all as you stayed by her side, wanting to end the cycle that you did not ask for.Ā
Time felt strange near Irminsul.
And when it was overā
the silence felt different.
Lighter.
"...It's complete." She said, looking at you with a smile. "Consider this your final life."
For the first time since Snezhnayaā
your future belonged to you again.
The world itself barely changed.
Mondstadt remained Mondstadt.
Fontaine remained Fontaine.
Liyue remained Liyue.
Sumeru remained Sumeru.
Only one thing changed.
Dottore lost.
āAnd you donāt have to worry about Dottore anymore,ā she had said, her voice gentle but certain. āI have made sure he will never find you again in this life.ā
You had stared at her for a long moment before asking, āAnd after this?ā
Her expression had softened when she answered, āThere will be no next life of yours for him to hunt down.ā
No next reincarnation to chase.
No next opportunity to try again.
The chain had finally broken.
The others never knew.
Alhaitham never learned that the thesis hidden inside his home had once belonged to the person who had loved him enough to keep arguing anyway.
Neuvillette never learned that the singer whose letters he still kept had once walked beneath another nation's skies with memories that did not belong to her.
Diluc never learned that his spouse, buried beneath Mondstadt's soil, had once stood beneath Fontaine's lights or Sumeru's trees.
And Zhongliā
Zhongli never learned that he had haunted another man's obsessions for centuries without ever knowing it.
Life moved forward.
As it always did.
Soon after you departed with Nahida and decided to join Traveler and Paimon with their endeavors for a short while. During such endeavors, you worked on an annotated edition of the adventurer'sāor rather, your first lifeāsājournal.Ā
By the time you departed with Traveler and Paimon to go back to your home, you decided to publish it.Ā
It became one of the most celebrated releases in modern academic history.
This time, instead of a rushed end, your annotated edition included a complete account of Snezhnaya and Sumeruās Aranara, pieced together with the Travelerās own accounts and observations, so that no region or creature was left unfinished.
The journal itself was already widely known by then, and thanks to the travelerās part in the book, it became even more famous.Ā
Sometimes journalists asked what inspired you to revisit it at all.
You never knew how to answer.
How could you explain that it felt less like republishing a famous work, and more like finally giving its author a voice that had been waiting to be heard?
Soon after, work brought you to Liyue Harbor.
The city was beautiful.
Not in the overwhelming way Fontaine often was with its grand performances and polished marble, nor in the scholarly way Sumeru carried itself beneath towering trees and endless knowledge.
Liyue felt different.
Warm.
Familiar.
Comforting in a way you couldn't explain.
You found yourself wandering through the harbor longer than necessary, listening absentmindedly to merchants advertising their wares, children laughing as they chased one another through the streets, and the distant creak of ships resting peacefully against the docks.
The scent of tea drifted from nearby stalls.
Lanterns swayed gently overhead.
And for some reason, your chest hurts, remembering your first life.Ā
ā¦Is he still here?Ā
It was enough to make you slow your steps, to make you feel as though things are not quite done.Ā
Until you heard it.Ā
"...You seem lost."
The voice came from beside you.
Calm.
Steady.
Familiar.
You turned.
And the world stopped.
Amber eyes met yours.
Golden.
Ancient.
Patient.
And suddenlyā
you remembered.
Lantern Rite.
Osmanthus wine.
Long conversations that stretched late into the evening.
Promises exchanged beneath golden skies.
The harbor.
The sea.
The quiet certainty that no matter how far your travels took you, there would always be someone waiting for your return.
Your breath caught in your throat.
The man standing before you simply looked at you quietly.
Not surprised.
Not confused.
Not questioning why tears had suddenly gathered in the eyes of a stranger he had supposedly never met.
Instead, he looked at you as though he had been expecting this moment for a very, very long time.
For a moment, neither of you spoke.
The noise of the harbor faded into the background.
Everything disappeared until it felt as though the entire world had narrowed down to the space between the two of you.
Your expression softened immediately.
Because somehowā
despite everythingā
you knew.
And somehow, he did too.
The corners of his lips lifted ever so slightly.
Not quite a smile.
Not yet.
But close.
The quiet sort of expression worn by someone finally setting down a burden they had carried for far longer than they should have.
"...I suppose," he said after a while, his voice softer than you remembered and yet exactly the same all at once, "that my memory has not betrayed me after all."
You stared at him.
Your heart hurt.
Not with grief.
Not anymore.
With something gentler.
Something warmer.
Something that had waited patiently beneath countless lives and countless names and countless endings.
He glanced toward the harbor then.
Toward the sea stretching beyond Liyue's shores.
Toward the horizon where an adventurer had once promised she would return after seeing the world.
Toward the place where he had watched countless ships come and go while waiting for one person who never came home.
When he looked back at you, there was warmth in his eyes.
Recognition.
Relief.
Patience.
The kind of patience only someone who had spent centuries learning how to wait could possess.
"My name is Zhongli."
The words were simple.
An introduction.
A beginning.
And yet somehowā
it felt like a homecoming.
Your eyes stung immediately.
Because once upon a time, long before journals and libraries and operas and vineyards and snow-covered laboratoriesā
you had known that name better than your own.
You accepted the hand he offered you.
Warm.
Steady.
Real.
"It is nice to meet you, Mister Zhongli."
The now retired Archon smiled then.
Not politely.
Not formally.
But with the same quiet smile he had worn centuries ago when a young adventurer with ink-stained fingers and impossible dreams had promised they would return once they had finished seeing the world.
This timeā
there were no experiments waiting in the snow.
No stolen endings.
No lives cut short before their time.
No unfinished promises left lingering between one lifetime and the next.
Only choices.
Only tomorrow.
Only a future that finally belonged to you.
And perhapsā
if both of you wished itā
a beginning.
Not another long time of waiting.
Not another reincarnation.
Not fate correcting itself.
Simplyā
the first chapter of a story that was finally allowed to reach its ending.
PREVIOUS LIFE
AUTHOR'S NOTE. thank you so much for reading and showing your support for this series! if i have to be honest, this part is truly the most difficult to write about. this is namely because of how i was trying to think of a good way to solve the reader's cycle without a major battle (when version vii was released, i was very tempted to change the endingābut then again, i don't have time to actually go through the entire nod-krai archon quests without going insane)āso this part is quite anticlimatic, if not rushed (?)
however, i also intended for the reader to not actually face dottore in a battle/confrontation, simply because i think it'd also be a slap to dottore's face that despite all he did to make sure reader's life goes back to square one again to get them, there was not one single life where he finally had the reader, even their last where they then spend the rest of their life with zhongli.
anyway! thank you again for the love and support. i really enjoyed writing this series and i hoped you guys enjoyed reading it too! i especially loved reading each of your comments (which i'll reply soon).
SYNOPSIS (of part). As you're now on the last part of your journey in exploring the seven regions and documenting all kinds of creatures, you learn that Snezhnaya is not for the faint of heart, especially after encountering a strange man who became (somewhat) your guide and your doom.
PAIRING/S. dottore x gn!reader, zhongli x reader (briefly mentioned)
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, mentions of illness, mentions of experiments, major character death, dottore is a warning itself, VERY ooc and potential grammar errors! (this was written before the teaser of snezhnaya)
WORD COUNT. 4010 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
Dottore, or otherwise his Omega segment, remembered you.
Memories, to him, were toolsācatalogued, dissected, discarded when no longer useful. Faces blurred together over centuries of experiments, screams fading into background noise, names reduced to data points. Yet yours persisted, sharp and vivid, lodged somewhere inconveniently deep.
It was in Snezhnaya when he first met you.Ā
Of all places.
You had no reason to be there.
No allegiance to the Tsaritsa, no protection from the Fatui, no natural resistance to the merciless cold that gnawed at flesh and bone. Adventurers rarely lasted long in Snezhnaya; fewer still ventured far from its cities. And yet there you wereātrekking through frozen forests, scribbling notes with numb fingers, kneeling beside half-buried tracks in the snow as if winter itself were an inconvenience rather than a threat.
A nuisance.
That was what you were at first.
Reports began trickling in from Fatui patrols stationed near the outskirtsācomplaints, mostly. Though this matter shouldāve been handed to someone else, Dottore received the reports due to how youāve been going around his old experiment sites.Ā
Ā Unidentified civilian spotted beyond permitted zones. Refuses escort. Claims research purposes.Observed sketching wildlife rather than fleeing hostile terrain.
Dottore had skimmed the first report absently, more amused than interested. Then another arrived. And another.
You appeared again and again, each time further north, further from safety. Where others saw recklessness, he saw something else.
Persistence.
Curiosity without self-preservation.
That both annoyed and intrigued him.
He began requesting details personally. Precise locations. Times. Behaviors.
It didnāt matter to you that Fatui numbers in Snezhnaya dwarfed those in other regions. It didnāt matter that the snowstorms could blind a seasoned soldier in seconds. It didnāt matter that creatures native to the cold were far more aggressive than their counterparts elsewhere.
What mattered to you were the animals.
You lingered near frostarm wolves to document their pack hierarchy. You followed cryo-infused birds for hours, noting migration patterns no one cared to study. You sketched malformed beasts warped by unexplained elements with the same gentle attention one might give a harmless forest creature.
You didnāt flinch.
Not even when danger loomed close.
āIf I didnāt know any better,ā one of his segments remarked dryly while reviewing a report, āIād assume they were from the Akademiya.ā
Dottore scoffed softly.
āNo,ā he replied. āThat would be far too limiting.ā
Students sought answers within rules. You chased questions that had no guarantee of survival.
That was far more valuable.
And soon, his observation became an obsession.
Soon, it wasnāt enough to receive secondhand reports. He instructed his fatui agents to follow youāall of you, from multiple angles, different distances, different perspectives. He cross-referenced their findings, noted inconsistencies, patterns in your behavior.
You slept poorly. Ate less than you should have. Yet your notes were meticulous. Thoughtful. Sometimes⦠philosophicalāat least, that was based on what his informants could provide about your journal.Ā
Dottore found himself reading the reports about you more closely than his own research notes.
And thenāsomething unprecedented happened.
His grand experiment, his pursuit of godhood, stalled.
Not due to failure. Not due to lack of resources.
But because you were more interesting.
āWhere are you going?ā One segment questioned, tilting its head. āAre you going after that pest?ā
āA variable,ā Dottore corrected calmly.
Eventually, he decided to intervene.
Not as Il Dottore. Not as a Harbinger. Not as the monster whispered about in half-forgotten academic circles.
But as a form of a random nobleman, acting as a concerned civilian of Snezhnaya.Ā
You were sketching a cryo-mutated fox when he approachedāwhite fur marred by crystalline growths along its spine with features similar to that of some noble in the city. You didnāt notice him at first.
āTraveling alone in Snezhnaya is ill-advised,ā he said mildly.
You were immediately startled, hand flying to your chest. āArchonsā! Donāt do that!ā
He smiled apologetically, adjusting his scarf. āMy apologies. I didnāt mean to frighten you.ā
You eyed him warily. āYou shouldnāt sneak up on people like that.ā
āNoted.ā He glanced at your journal. āYouāre not from here.ā
āNo,ā you admitted. āBut I donāt see why that matters.ā
āIt matters because people disappear here,ā he replied evenly. āEspecially those who wander where they shouldnāt.ā
You hesitated, then sighed. āIām careful.ā
A lie. Or perhaps self-deception.
He offered to accompany you āfor safety.ā You refused at first. Then relented after realizing he kept reappearing anywayāalways at a distance, always watching.
Fine, you told yourself. One more shadow in a land full of them.
You spoke more than you intended.
About creatures. About adaptation. About how humanity feared what it didnāt understand. You wanted to document Teyvatās creatures in order for people to understand: they are just creatures trying to live and survive like them.Ā
Dottore listened.
Then he asked questions.
Not simple ones. Not harmless curiosity.
āWhat would you sacrifice for knowledge?ā
āIf a creature must suffer from a predatorās claws, is that suffering justified?ā
āIs survival proof of worth, or merely chance?ā
Your answers were thoughtful. Troubled. Honest.
You didnāt give him what he wantedābut you gave him something far rarer.
Resistance.
And as the snow continued to fall around you both, Dottore realized something unsettling.
You werenāt just another subject, but a hypothesis, one he intended to test.Ā
The cold of Snezhnaya continued to gnaw at you, sharper than any blade, but you hardly noticed. Your boots crunched over frost-hardened earth, pen in hand, journal tucked under your arm, eyes scanning the subtle traces of wildlife. Each footprint, each tremor in the snow told a story, and you were determined to record it all.
Dottore followed. Always at a distance, sometimes near enough for you to catch a shadow moving between the trees, but never too close to startle. You had long grown used to him. He was polite, quiet, almost ghostlike in his presence, and at first, you found it oddly comforting. He asked questions about your findings, about patterns you noticed in the behavior of the creatures, and sometimes, he challenged your observations, forcing you to think deeper than before.
āAre you certain these cryo-wolves hunt in pairs?ā he asked one evening, crouching beside a paw print, the faint light of a crescent moon casting long shadows across the snow.
āIām positive,ā you replied softly, tracing the grooves with your gloved finger. āIāve observed them for three days. Their movements are coordinated. You can see it in how they approach prey, almost like a ritual.ā
He nodded slowly, pretending to take notes, but you knew better. He didnāt care about the wolves. He cared about you.
Days turned into weeks. Weeks into months.
Somewhere along the way, Dottore began to anticipate your reactionsāwhen you would argue, when you would laugh quietly under your breath, when you would grow distant and thoughtful as you stared into the horizon. He learned your habits with unsettling ease.
And perhaps, for a moment, Dottore allowed himself to believe that the bond between you two was mutual. That your little smile when he asked his weird questions, the way you paused to explain something complex, maybe⦠maybe it was growing into something resembling closeness.
It lingered in his mind far longer than it should have.
āYou trust me,ā he said one night, watching you stir a pot of half-frozen stew.
You shrugged. āYou havenāt killed me yet.ā
A joke.
He smiled as if it were something more.
Until that one damned night.Ā
Usually, youād retreat to your little tent and fix your journal and whatnot, but the two of you managed to find a cave that gave you no reason to settle a tent.Ā
So for the first time, Dottore got to see what youāve been doing every night.Ā
You sat near the fire, shoulders hunched against the cold, pen moving with a gentleness he had never seen you afford your research notes. Your expression was⦠different.
Softer.
Warmer.
Dottore felt something coil unpleasantly in his chest.
āTo whom are you writing?ā he asked, voice neutral.
You startledāthen instinctively turned the page away. āNo one important.ā
A lie.
He moved closer. āYouāve never hidden your work from me before.ā
āThis isnāt work,ā you said sharply. Too quickly, almost protectively.Ā
Silence stretched.
Finally, he glimpsed the name on the top left of the paper.
Zhongli.
He didnāt know who that was.
But he knew immediately that he despised him.
āWho is Zhongli?ā Dottore asked.
You hesitated. Your fingers tightened around the letter. And thenāsomething crossed your face. Something tender. Something achingly human.
āMy home,ā you said quietly.
The word home tasted bitter on his tongue.
āA man, then,ā he pressed.
You looked away. āIt doesnāt concern you.ā
It concerned him deeply.
That night, Dottore didnāt sleep.
Whoever this Zhongli wasāhe was a threat. A distraction. A variable that would take you away from Snezhnaya. From him.
From progress.
And worseā
You were planning to return.
Your journal began to change after that.
He read your journal while you slept every night. He noted how your entries grew shorter. More erratic. Pages stopped detailing routes forward and instead mentioned preparations. Final sketches. Reflections.
Perhaps Iāll end my journey here.There is someone waiting for me.
Dottore felt something crack.
He began to intervene.
Fatui patrols appeared more frequently along your routes. Ships stopped accepting passengers. Lodgings turned you away without explanation. Your supplies went missing. Your mailāyour letters to Zhongliānever reached their destination.Ā
When you noticed, panic set in.
āSomethingās wrong,ā you muttered one evening, still staring at the newsletter that announced yet another banned transportation to other regions. āWhy is Snezhnaya closing its borders out of nowhere?ā
Dottore watched you carefully. āPerhaps Snezhnaya is discouraging its people from leaving.ā
Your laugh was strained. āI wonāt be trapped.ā
You tried anyway.
And failed.
And finallyāwhen you confronted him directlyāhe stopped pretending.
No longer was the elegant and calm traveling nobleman youāve come to trust and like.Ā
āYou canāt leave,ā he said plainly.
Horror dawned on your face. āWhatā¦?ā
āI wonāt allow it.ā
The mask fell.
AndĀ so, Il Dottore finally stood before youānot as a concerned citizen, but a Harbinger. A monster.
You ran, leaving most of your things behind.
You fought.Ā
It didnāt matter.
You were intercepted under the guise of āprotection,ā escorted somewhere warm, quiet, far from prying eyes. By the time you realized the locks were on the inside, the doors had already sealed behind you.
āYou canāt keep me here,ā you said, breath quickening as you backed away. āI have somewhere to be.ā
āTo return to Liyue?ā he asked calmly. āTo him?ā
You froze.
That was when fear truly set in.
From that day onward, escape became your sole purpose.
You tested doors. Windows. Guards. You memorized patrol patterns, counted seconds between shifts. You tried bargaining, reasoning, pleading. You screamed onceāonly onceābefore learning the walls were designed to swallow sound.
Your journal went missing alongside your things after you were taken hereāabandoned in your campsite. But that didnāt mean it took away your writing and thoughts. You hid a few papers beneath the mattress, inside vents, beneath loose floor panels. You wrote obsessivelyāroutes, dates, fragments of memories you feared losing.
I must go back. He is waiting. If I stay too long, I wonāt exist the same way anymore.
The illness began shortly after your final failed escape.
At first, you thought it was exhaustionāyour body protesting constant fear or perhaps the unforgiving cold. Then came the fever. Then the weakness. Your limbs felt heavy, as if gravity itself had increased. Your hands trembled too badly to write.
Dottore noticed immediately.
āYouāre deteriorating faster than expected,ā he muttered, irritation threaded with something darker.
āLet me go,ā you rasped. āIāll recover if I leave.ā
āWho says you canāt recover here?ā He questioned, tilting his head.Ā
You stopped being a guest then.
You became a subject.
He ran tests under the guise of treatmentādrawing blood, administering unfamiliar compounds, attaching devices that hummed softly against your skin. He told himself it was necessary. That understanding your condition was the only way to save you.
But the truth was simpler.
You were dying.
Your body rejected rest. Food tasted like ash. Even warmth couldnāt reach your bones anymore. Some days you were lucid enough to demand answers.
āWhat are you doing to me?ā you whispered once, voice cracking. āWhy wonāt you let me go home?ā
āBecause you donāt have one anymore,ā he said too quickly.
āYou will never see him again.āĀ
That was when you understood.
Youāll never go back to Zhongli.Ā
Youāll die alone.Ā
Soon, weeks flew. When conventional methods failedāwhen your condition worsened no matter what he triedāhis attention turned elsewhere. To Irminsul. To records of erased lives, rewritten fates, memories folded into new forms.
āIf death is inevitable,ā he murmured to himself one night, standing over your unconscious form, āthen perhaps it doesnāt have to be final.ā
The experiment was never meant to save you.
It was meant to trap you.
He tampered with Irminsulās logic that he happened to encounter when he decided to continue to pursue godhood, threading your existence through its rootsānot as a singular life, but as a recurring anomaly. He cannot make you immortal, but he can make sure this wonāt be the last time he sees you.Ā
At least in your next life, he can restart everything and make you love him instead. Make him your home.Ā
When you woke after the procedure, you felt wrong.
Hollow. Like something essential had been misplaced.
You looked at him with dull clarity. āWhat did you do?ā
āI ensured you wouldnāt disappear,ā he said. āEver again.ā
Your health collapsed soon after.
The illness devoured you from the inside out. Your strength faded until you could no longer stand. Your voice dwindled to a whisper. You became dependentānot just on his care, but on his presence.
Nature had won. You were dying anyway.
So you died in his arms.
Not peacefully.
You clutched weakly at his sleeve, breath shallow, eyes searching his face with a clarity that hurt worse than any scream.
āYouāll never find me,ā you whispered. āNot the way you want to.ā
Rage flared through him as your pulse faded beneath his fingersānot at you, but at the inevitability of it all.
But at least, his experiment on you worked.Ā
It was thanks to Irminsulās deeper mechanisms that you no longer simply die.
You reset.
A recurrence error woven into the structure of your existenceāan anomaly that refused finalization. Every time your life reached its end, Irminsul attempted to archive you as complete. And every time, something fractured. Something reasserted the variables. A correction made in the dark between worlds.
You returned.
Not as continuity.
But as an iteration.
He always finds you again.
As an Akademiya student, buried in texts about biology and creatures.
As an opera singer, voice too beautiful for a single lifetime.
As a librarianās assistant, quiet, observant, always drifting toward books instead of people.Ā
Each time, you lived. Loved. Died.
He was always one step too late. Because in every iteration, without fail, you drifted toward someone else before he could get you.Ā
There was always another man.
Men who grounded you. Who softened you. Who became your reason to stay.
And every time, Il Dottore watched from the shadowsāseething, calculating, ensuring that no life you lived would ever truly escape him.
And every time he finds you, youāre with him.Ā
Alhaitham.
Neuvillette.Ā
Diluc.Ā
He still remembers Zhongli. And oh how he hated him the most with a fury that eclipsed reason from how much your relationship still haunts each of your life.Ā
So just like in your first life, he interfered.
He whispered to Azar about your thesis and how it could potentially sabotage Azarās plans.
He manipulated a jealous junior and made sure the odds were against you during trial.
He made sure medicines were laced in poison with delicate precision.
He made sure you died.
Again.
And again.
Because this timeā
In each of your livesā
If he canāt have you, then no one can. And he wonāt stop until he finally has you.Ā
You woke to the groan of metal and the slow, nauseating sway beneath your body.
It was that dream again.
You thought you were still in the temporary holding wing of the Palais, the memory of Neuvillette declaring you guilty still lingering in your mind. For a moment, you thought it was another dreamāanother cruel half-memory stitched together by exhaustion and fear. Then the scent hit you. Salt. Oil. Cold sea air forced through narrow vents. Your eyes snapped open.
A cabin ceiling loomed above you, low and unfamiliar, lantern-light swaying with the movement of the ship. Your wrists were free, but your body felt heavy, sluggish, as if something had dulled your nerves. When you tried to sit up, the world tilted violently.
You were on a ship.
Panic surged through you as you staggered to your feet, boots scraping against iron-plated flooring. You rushed to the small circular window set into the wall, and froze.
Rain.
Endless, merciless rain battered the sea outside, blurring the horizon into nothing but gray. Fontaineās rain. But what made your heart instantly sink was the sight of Fontaine City in the distance.Ā
Youāre leaving.Ā
āNo,ā you whispered. āNoāno, no, noāā
The door creaked open behind you.
āYouāre awake earlier than expected,ā an unfamiliar voice said, almost pleasantly.
You turned slowly.
You knew a Fatui Harbinger when you saw one.Ā
Dottore stood in the doorway, hands clasped behind his back, coat pristine as ever, mask tilted just enough to catch the lanternās glow. The ship lurched, and the rain thundered louder, as if the sea itself were listening.
āYou,ā you breathed. āWhere am I?ā
āEn route,ā he replied. āNorthbound to Snezhnaya.ā
Your heart dropped into your stomach.
āYou took me out of my cell,ā you said, voice shaking. āI-I was supposed to be in the Fortress of Meropide. You had no authorityāā
He interrupted smoothly, āOn the contrary. You were deemed guilty and have no place to go except prison.ā
āIt was meant to be!ā
āIs it?ā He stepped into the cabin, the door shutting behind him with a decisive clang. āFontaine prides itself on justice, but public opinion is a powerful current. Once you fall into it, you either sink⦠or are carried somewhere else.ā
You backed away until your back met the cold wall. āTake me back.ā
Dottore tilted his head. āAnd condemn you to rot in the Fortress of Meropide? Years underground. Forgotten. Broken down piece by piece by a system that already decided you were expendable?ā
His gaze sharpened.
āI offered you an alternative. You can stay with me instead where you can sing to your heartās content and have freedom.āĀ
You laughed weakly, hysteria clawing at your throat. āYou call being taken by the Fatui an alternative? Freedom? I know what kind of people you are.ā
āI call it survival,ā he said calmly. āYouāre a convicted individual with no future in Fontaine. With me, at least, you remain⦠free and wanted.ā
The words made your skin crawl.
You rushed back to the window, pressing your palm to the glass. Rain streamed down it like tears you couldnāt shed. Somewhere beyond that storm was the city you loved. Somewhere beneath those clouds was Neuvilletteāhis quiet presence, his steady voice, the way he looked at you as if you were still worth something even when the world turned its back.
Nothing was better without your career. Without your people. Without the spotlight.Ā
Without him.Ā
āYou donāt understand,ā you whispered. āI donāt care if I rot. I donāt care if the world hates me. I justāā Your voice broke. āI just want to go back.ā
āTo him?ā Dottore asked, almost amused.
You turned sharply. āDonāt you dare, harbinger.ā
He didnāt need to.
āThe Iudex cannot save you,ā Dottore continued. āEven if he wished to, he is bound by law. And the law already failed you.ā
The rain outside grew louder, angrier, as if echoing your thoughts.
You closed your eyes.
Based on what youāve heard about the Fatui, if you stayed, you would disappear anywayāpiece by piece, experiment by experiment, until there was nothing left of you that Neuvillette would recognize. No letters, no trial, and no justice.
But whatās left when youāve already lost everything?
Youād rather die than suffer this fate.Ā
You moved before fear could stop you.
In one sudden motion, you shoved past Dottore, sprinting down the narrow corridor as alarms began to blare. Shouts followedāFatui agents scrambling, boots pounding against metalābut you were already climbing the slick steps to the deck, ignoring the loud shout coming from the harbingerās lips.Ā
The storm hit you like a living thing.
The wind tore at your clothes. Rain soaked you through in seconds, icy and relentless. The sea below churned violently, dark and endless.
āYouāll die!ā someone shouted behind you.
You laughed through tears, rain mixing with them until no one could tell the difference.
āI already did,ā you whispered, stepping forward to the rails thatās stopping you from diving to the ocean.Ā
You took one last look at the horizonāthe direction Fontaine lay hidden behind the storm, where Neuvillette stood beneath the same rain, unaware that you were slipping out of the world.
āIām sorry,ā you breathed, to Neuvillette, to everything you couldnāt have.
Then you jumped.
The sea swallowed you without ceremony.
By the time the Fatui managed to halt the ship and send their divers, there was nothing left to find. No body. No trace. Just rain, endless rain, washing your name away from the surface of the world.
Rain continued to pour as if nothing had happenedāunbothered, unrelenting. Waves crashed against the hull, swallowing the place where you had disappeared without leaving so much as a ripple worth remembering.
Dottore stood at the edge of the deck long after the alarms fell silent.
Agents waited behind him, tense, soaked, awaiting orders that never came. None of them dared to speak. None of them dared to move him away from the railing.
He stared into the sea.
For the first time in a long while, his thoughts did not immediately arrange themselves into equations and outcomes. There was no neat conclusion to this. No specimen to recover. No body to dissect. Just an empty stretch of water and a variable that had refused to behave.
āā¦How inefficient,ā he murmured at last, irritated.Ā
But his voice lacked its usual bite.
The rain streaked down his mask, blurring the lenses until the world before him fractured into indistinct shapes. Somewhere beneath those waves, you were goneānot captured, not preserved, not his.
A subordinate finally spoke, voice hesitant. āShould we deploy a search team?ā
Dottore was silent for several seconds.
āNo,ā he said eventually. āThe sea is thorough.ā
He straightened, turning away from the railing, coat billowing in the wind. But before he left the deck, his gloved hand tightenedājust onceāagainst the metal.
Another failed retrieval.Ā
In the days that followed, your name was erased from transport logs and rewritten into private records. Fontaine would remember you as a criminal who vanished. Snezhnaya would remember nothing at all.
But Dottore remembered.
He replayed the moment endlessly: the rain, your eyes fixed on the horizon, the certainty with which you stepped forward. No hesitation. No bargaining. As if death itself had been preferable to a future that included him.
āā¦So thatās how it is,ā he mused one night, seated alone in his quarters, fingers tapping idly against a data slate.
If the sea had taken you, then nature itself had interfered with his work.
Again.Ā
He despised interference.
And yetā
A slow smile curved beneath the mask.
āI suppose Iāll see you in the next one.ā
Far beneath Irminsulās roots, experiments were adjusted. Parameters refined. The cycle tightened, anchored more firmly than before. If you insisted on slipping through deathās grasp, then he would simply follow.
Again.
And again.
And again.
One way or another, he would find you in the next life.
After allā
You had already proven that you could not truly disappear.
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
AUTHOR'S NOTE. i cannot emphasize how OLD this whole series was drafted, and i had to adjust certain details based on what ik about nod-krai (i did not touch the archon quests, i'm too busy for allat) soooo pls pay no mind to any details that may be inaccurate to the canon lore! thank you for your continuous support, i hope you'll enjoy the last part tomorrow <3
p.s. speaking of which, donāt expect any āfinal battlesā for the last part š
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this fourth life, life was much kinder and happier to you. Born in the region of songs and wind, you're a shy librarian assistant in the Knights of Favonius' Library, preferring books over people. However, when tasked by Lisa to talk to people and collect their borrowed books, you happen to encounter an extinguished gentleman.
PAIRING. diluc ragnvindr x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, fluff, mentions of illness, major character death, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 3560 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
Unlike your other lives, this one did not begin with prophecy, blood, or brilliance.
It began with dust.
Fine motes of it drifted through the air of the Knights of Favonius Library, illuminated by tall windows and gentle afternoon light. The scent of parchment and ink clung to your clothes more faithfully than any perfume ever could. Your days passed between shelves and ledgers, between the careful turning of pages and the quiet satisfaction of returning books to their rightful places.
It was peaceful.
You liked it that way.
While others sought glory as knights, adventurers, or bards beneath Mondstadtās open sky, you found fulfillment in silence. Stories lived more vividly in your mind than they ever could beyond the city walls. Heroes, dragons, ancient godsāyou met them all through books, safe and sound, with a cup of tea growing cold beside you.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Or so you thought.
āReading again?ā
You startled, nearly dropping the book in your hands as a familiar, amused voice chimed behind you.
āMāMiss Lisa!ā you blurted, snapping the book shut far too quickly. āI didnāt realize you wereā!ā
āLisa, darling,ā she corrected with a laugh, leaning casually over the desk beside you. āIf you keep calling me āmiss,ā I might actually start to feel ancient.ā
You flushed, fingers tightening around the bookās spine. āSāsorryā¦ā
Her eyes flicked down to what you had been reading. āNow,ā she said lightly, āwhat sort of story managed to steal your soul so thoroughly that you didnāt notice your dear old friend approaching?ā
You hesitated, then slid the book toward her. āItās⦠an old journal. Written by an adventurer.ā
Lisaās brows lifted in recognition as she leaned closer. āOh? This one?ā Her smile softened. āI remember this. I found this old thing back when I studied at the Akademiya and managed to find a copy of it to bring it here. It was certainly one of the earliest attempts to document Teyvatās creatures in detail.ā
You nodded, brushing your thumb over the worn leather cover. āIt was one of the first books I ever read. I keep⦠coming back to it.ā
āI can tell,ā Lisa teased gently. āYou always do have a sentimental streak.ā
Then, with the unmistakable tone of someone about to ask for trouble, she straightened. āI need a favor.ā
Your stomach sank immediately.
āI have a lunch engagement I absolutely cannot miss,ā Lisa continued breezily. āNormally, Iād be the one reminding borrowers about overdue booksābut since youāre the only other librarian, Iāll need you to handle it today.ā
You stared at her.
āā¦You mean,ā you said carefully, āgo outside?ā
āYes.ā
āAnd talk to people?ā
āCorrect.ā
She grinned wickedly. āSocialize!āĀ
You were doomed.
And so, by sunset, you found yourself wandering Mondstadt with a list clutched in your hands, heart pounding each time you asked a stranger for books that they borrowed. One by one, you found the namesāuntil only one remained.
The last led you somewhere you dreaded.
Angelās Share.
The tavern was loud, warm, and overwhelmingly alive. Laughter spilled from every table, mugs clinked, and the smell of alcohol made your nose wrinkle instinctively. You kept your head down, weaving carefully through the crowd.
You tapped the nearest man at the counter. āEāexcuse me, have you seenāā
āHah?ā He spun around, eyes glassy. āWhatāre you pokinā me for?ā
āIāIām sorry, I was justāā
āWhatās that got to do with me?!ā he snapped.
You stumbled back. āIām sorry! Iāll justāā
You collided with something solid.
Strong.
Warm.
You gasped, spinning around in panicāonly to freeze.
A tall man stood behind you, crimson hair catching the tavernās light like embers. His gaze was sharp, unyielding, fixed squarely on the drunk man before you.
āWhat seems to be the problem?ā
The voice was calm. Cold. Cutting.
The drunk sobered instantly, muttering excuses before retreating into the crowd.
You exhaled shakily. āI-Iām sorry,ā you rushed, holding up the list. āI was just looking for someone.ā
The red-haired man glanced at the paper without taking it. āā¦They donāt live in the city.ā
You blinked. āā¦Oh.ā
āTheyāre in Springvale,ā he added. āThatās why you couldnāt find them.ā
Your shoulders sagged in relief and embarrassment all at once. āThat explains it⦠Thank you.ā
He checked the time. āYou should go home. Itās late.ā
You followed his gaze, startled. āOhā! Youāre right! I should just visit them tomorrow morning.ā You bowed quickly. āThank you again, mister! Have a good night!ā
You fled before your nerves could betray you further.
It wasnāt until you returned to the libraryāLisa fussing over youāthat you learned his name.
āDiluc Ragnvindr,ā she said knowingly. āHeās the owner of Dawn Winery and operates Angelās Share. Though if you ask me, Iād recommend you talk to someone who knows more about him than I do.ā
You pretended not to care.
Later that night, halfway home, a familiar voice stopped you.
āYou dropped this.ā
You turnedāand there he was, holding your list.Ā
āOh!ā Your face lit up as you took it. āThank you, Mister Diluc! I didnāt even know I lost it!ā
He made no change of expression. āā¦Just Diluc,ā he corrected, āand it's fine. I only happened to find it when I was closing the tavern.ā He said.Ā
You smiled shyly.Ā
And so, he walked you home without another word, steps steady beside yours. It was strange, but you didnāt reject him as you let him walk with you. The silence was something you appreciated from him, as your social battery had already drained down from the amount of people youāve approached for your errand.Ā
But as soon as you finally closed your door, heart racing, cheeks warm after saying goodbye to the red-haired gentleman, you thought to yourself, āmaybe going out wasnāt so bad.āĀ
If your first meeting with Diluc Ragnvindr had been brief and startling, then every meeting after that was⦠quiet.
Not awkwardāno, never that. Just quiet in a way that felt deliberate, as if the world itself lowered its voice whenever the two of you happened to occupy the same space.
At first, they were coincidences.
You saw him early one morning while sweeping fallen leaves near the library steps. He passed by without stopping, coat fastened neatly, expression composed as ever. You lifted your head just in time to catch his gaze flicker toward you.
āā¦Good morning,ā you murmured, barely louder than the rustle of leaves.
āGood morning,ā he replied, voice low, measured.
That was all. He walked on, boots echoing softly against the stone.
Yet your heart lingered in that moment long after he disappeared from view.
Another time, you were crouched not too far from the Knightsā headquarters, breaking bits of bread for the stray dogs that lingered there. They wagged their tails eagerly, noses nudging your hands as you laughed under your breath.
āYouāll spoil them,ā a familiar voice said behind you.
You startled, nearly dropping the bread. āO-Ohā!ā
Diluc stood a few steps away, arms crossed loosely, gaze fixed not on youābut on the dogs.
āThey deserve it,ā you said timidly, offering a piece to the boldest one.
āā¦I suppose they do,ā he conceded.
He stayed without saying anything more. The dogs eventually grew brave enough to approach him too, sniffing his boots before retreating.
You glanced up at him, your smile growing. āThey like you.ā
He huffed quietly. āI doubt that.ā
āThey do,ā you insisted softly. āAnimals can tell.ā
Something unreadable passed through his eyes then. He nodded once, as if accepting a truth he hadnāt expected.
After that, you began noticing him everywhere.
At the market, standing silently while vendors greeted him with respect. At the plaza during quiet afternoons, watching Mondstadt from the edges rather than its center. Sometimes, when you were shelving books near the windows, you swore you could spot a flash of red hair outsideāonly for it to vanish the moment you looked properly.
You never chased him. Never waved. Never forced conversation.
And neither did he.
But slowly, inevitably, silence became something shared.
When you passed him on the street, there would be a nod. A pause. Sometimes, a single sentence.
āHow is the library?ā
āQuiet today.ā
āā¦Good.ā
That was enough.
Weeks turned into months.
Sometimes, he would walk you homeānot always speaking, just matching your pace every time. The night air would be cool, lanterns glowing softly, your steps syncing naturally.
āThank you,ā youād say at your door.
āRest well,ā heād reply.
You would linger, fingers curled against the hem of your sleeves, wishingājust a littleāthat heād say more.
You never asked.
Neither did he.
And yet somehow, you began to fall in love.
It wasnāt sudden as there was no dramatic moment nor a realization that struck like lightning unlike the books youāve read. It was much quieter than that, if not gentler.Ā
It was the way he noticed when you shivered and wordlessly removed his coat to put it around your shoulders. The way he remembered your favorite drink without being told. The way his presence alone made the city feel less overwhelming.
For Diluc, it was similar.
You were calm where his world was sharp. Gentle where his nights were violent. You never asked too much about anything, never pried into his life. You listened when he spoke, and respected his silence just as much.
One evening, as you walked together beneath the stars, you finally spoke what had been hovering between you for months.
āā¦Would you like to come in?ā You asked quietly, standing at your door. āFor tea.ā
He hesitated.
āā¦If you donāt mind, then yes.ā
That night, words came slowly, but they came. You spoke of books, of your childhood, of how you preferred stories to reality. He spoke of responsibility, of Mondstadt, of handling his business while also trying to do his part in protecting Mondstadt.
When he reached for your handāhis hand warm and comfortingāit felt inevitable.Ā
Your relationship bloomed softly through shared mornings, late-night conversations, gentle touches. Laughter whispered rather than shouted. Love that felt like coming home.
And time passed like a dream.
Eventually, you two married beneath Mondstadtās open sky. It was simple, yet heartfelt. Lisa cried openly. Kaeya smiled knowingly. Diluc held your hands as if letting go was unthinkable.
Since then, the two of you have gotten closer than ever.
There were mornings where you would force him to eat breakfast before the two of you could leave for work, much to his resignation, and evenings where he would return to find you waiting by the fireplace with a book in hand despite the late hour.
"You're still awake."
You looked up from your book immediately. "You're late."
"...Work."
"I know." You smiled softly. "Welcome home, Diluc."
He would never admit it aloud, but those two words quickly became his favorite in the world.
You accompanied him through grape fields during harvest seasons, sat beside him during paperwork just to keep him company, and filled Dawn Winery's halls with warmth that had been absent for years. The servants adored you, with Adelinde often remarking that the manor had finally begun feeling alive again.
Eventually, your quiet life became filled with countless little routines that belonged only to the two of you.
Reading together in silence by the fireplace.
Waiting for him after his late-night ventures as the Darknight Hero with bandages already prepared (you later found out about his secret when he came home late at night one time with a few bruises that certainly didnāt belong to any reckless drunkards).Ā
Taking walks around Mondstadt after closing hours.
Listening to you ramble excitedly about books and creatures while he listened with more attention than he ever gave to anything else.
Three years passed like that.
Three peaceful years.
Three happy years.
Diluc had spent so much of his life surrounded by grief and responsibility that he had forgotten what peace felt like until you arrived.
Home stopped being Dawn Winery.
Home became wherever you were.
Until, something changed.Ā
It started small with youāfatigue that lingered too long, dizziness that came too often. Diluc noticed before you did. He always did.
āYouāre having a fever again,ā he said one morning, concern etched deep into his voice as he placed a hand against your forehead.Ā
āIām fine,ā you insisted.
But you werenāt.
The doctorās visit was quiet. Too quiet. Diluc had been insisting on his visit after noting that itās already been more than a week since you started getting more tired and sick.Ā
āā¦Iām sorry,ā the physician said eventually, eyes heavy. āThereās nothing more we can do.ā
From the moment the physician left your chambers, Diluc did not leave your side.
He did not step into the night as the Darknight Hero. He did not come to his office. He did not visit Angelās Share. The world beyond your bed might as well have ceased to exist.
You needed him.Ā
He sat beside you through the long hours when sleep refused to come, your breaths shallow and uneven. When pain stole your strength, he held your hand and whispered reassurances he wasnāt sure you could still hear. He learned the rhythm of your suffering with the way your fingers twitched before the ache set in, the way your brow furrowed when it became too much, and the way you looked so pained.Ā
He wanted nothing more than to take your pain away and bear it himself if it meant he got to see you happy and healthy again.Ā
āIām here,ā he would murmur, again and again, as if repetition could anchor you to the world.
āI wonāt go anywhere.ā
āYouāre not alone.ā
Sometimes you smiled faintly at him, eyes glassy but warm. Other times, you simply stared at the ceiling, exhaustion weighing heavier than words.
On the nights when your fever worsened, he pressed cool towels to your forehead, his hands trembling despite himself. He had faced abyss mages, Fatui agents, and monsters born of shadow without fearābut this helplessness hollowed him out in ways no enemy ever could.
āI should have noticed sooner,ā he whispered once, voice breaking in the quiet room.
āYou always notice,ā you replied weakly, forcing a smile. āThis⦠isnāt something we can fix.ā
He squeezed his eyes shut at that.
Days blurred into one another. You grew lighter in his arms, thinner, fragile as parchment. You no longer had the strength to leave the bed. Even speaking costs you more than it once had.
Yet your mind remained sharp.
One afternoon, sunlight filtering through the curtains, you asked him to open the window. The breeze carried the distant sounds of Mondstadtālaughter, bells, life.
āI used to think,ā you murmured, āthat I was boring.ā
Diluc frowned. āNever.ā
āI didnāt go on adventures. I didnāt fight monsters. I just⦠read.ā
āYou built worlds,ā he said quietly. āYou lived a thousand lives through books.ā
You smiled, eyes drifting toward the shelf across the room.
āDo you remember the journal?ā you asked. āThe adventurer who recorded the creatures of Teyvat?ā
āYes.ā
āI always felt⦠connected to them,ā you continued. āLike they were speaking to me. Like⦠thereās something about them that made me feel like I know them.āĀ
Diluc brushed your hair back gently. āYou donāt have to think about that now.ā
āI want to.ā You insisted softly. āPromise me something.ā
āā¦Anything.ā
āWhen this is over,ā you whispered, ādonāt lock yourself away. Donāt drown in work. Donāt burn yourself out at night.ā
He swallowed. āI wonāt.ā
āYou will.ā You breathed. āSo⦠You should travel. See the world. I know youāve done it before and youāre not allowed to come to Snezhnaya, but⦠I think traveling will do you good.ā
His voice shook. āWeāll go together.ā
You looked at him thenātruly looked at himāwith a sadness so deep it hurt to witness.
āā¦You know I canāt.ā
Silence fell heavy between you.
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against yours. āThen Iāll go,ā he whispered. āAnd Iāll tell you everything when I come back.ā
You exhaled softly, content. āā¦Iād like that.ā
That night, your breathing slowed.
Diluc noticed immediately.
āHey,ā he said quietly, sitting upright. āStay with me.ā
Your eyes fluttered open, unfocused. You smiled faintly.
āDilucā¦ā
āIām here.ā
āThank you,ā you whispered. āFor choosing me.ā
Tears slipped down his cheeks before he could stop them. āThere was never a choice. Itās always been you.ā
Your hand slackened in his grasp.
And just like thatā
You were gone.
The scream that tore from his chest never left the room.
The funeral passed like a nightmare he couldnāt wake from.
Flowers, condolences, soft voicesāall meaningless. The city mourned quietly, respectfully. Everyone came. Everyone cried, most especially Lisa, your dearest friend who had watched you bloom and love like no other.Ā
Kaeya stood near Diluc, watching, observing, but never spoke a word.Ā
Diluc stood still.
Unmoving.
That night, he returned to your chambers alone.
The bed was cold. Too large.
He sat where you used to read, staring at the bookshelf until his gaze landed on the familiar, worn journal. With shaking hands, he picked it up.
The journal was your āsomething oldā given by Lisa on your wedding day. He remembered rushing to your assigned room before the wedding worriedly when he heard your sobs and cries, only to relax when he realized they were tears of joy. He knew how much the book meant to you, how it stayed with you throughout your childhood to adulthood.Ā
And now, the journal became your memory.Ā
Diluc did not sleep that night.
He sat in the armchair beside the bookshelf until dawn threatened the horizon, the adventurerās journal heavy in his hands. Candle wax pooled uselessly on the table; he hadnāt noticed when the flame burned low, or when it finally died.
Page after page, he read.
The handwriting was neat but lively, filled with curiosity that bled through every careful line. Notes about creaturesātheir habits, their calls, the way they reacted to kindness rather than force. Small personal remarks slipped between observations.
Day by day, I grew eager to finish this book and come back to my home. My dear readers, if I can find my own home, then so can you.Ā
Dilucās throat tightened.
Finally, he reached the final entryāthe one that was cut off abruptly, mid-thought, as if the writer had been pulled away before they could finish. The last page was the publisher informing about how the original journal was found in Snezhnaya in the writerās campsite that had most of their things, and it seemed they had died from an illness before they could complete it.Ā
He then turned the page, and his breath immediately caught.Ā
The illustration greeted him in silence.
It was not identical. It shouldnāt have been. The clothes were unfamiliar, the setting foreign, the era wrong.
But the eyesā
Dilucās fingers trembled as they traced the page.
The shape of the eyes. The softness of the smile that seemed to carry both wonder and melancholy. The way curiosity shone through the drawing as if the artist had captured a soul rather than a face.
His breath hitched.
āNoā¦ā he whispered.
The author⦠looks like you.Ā
The resemblance was undeniable. Subtle enough that a stranger might dismiss it, but Diluc was no stranger. He knew every expression you woreāevery smile you tried to hide, every thoughtful gaze when you were lost in a book.
āThis isnāt possible,ā he said hoarsely, though the words rang hollow.
Memories resurfaced unbiddenāyour fascination with this journal, the way you spoke of the adventurer as if they were someone you missed. The longing in your voice when you spoke of lands you had never seen.
Or perhaps⦠had.
His attention remained fixed on the page, heart pounding as a single thought took root.
ONE WEEK LATER
Jean adjusted the papers on her desk, exhaustion evident in the tight set of her jaw. Reports had been piling up far too quickly for the past few daysātoo many incidents, too many unsettling patterns.
Her gaze paused on one document in particular.
Fatui activity increasing near Dawn Winery.
She frowned.
It was unusual. The winery was well-guarded, discreet, andāuntil recentlyāof little strategic interest to the Fatui. Yet sightings had surged. Scouts reported unfamiliar agents lingering near the outskirts. Some claimed they had seen figures near the vineyard at odd hours, always vanishing before they could be confronted.
Jean exhaled slowly.
āā¦This timing,ā she murmured.
She reached for another report.
Unidentified individual observed near a civilian grave. Repeated visits. No signs of theft or vandalism. Purpose unknown.
Her grip tightened.
She stood abruptly, chair scraping softly against the floor. She knew who to talk to.Ā
Outside, the wind stirred the trees of Mondstadtāgentle, mourning.
Far beyond the city walls, near the quiet resting place beneath the shade of old oaks, the air felt wrong. Too still. Too watchful.
Boots pressed into the earth where flowers had been laid not long ago.
A gloved hand hovered above a grave, not touchingānever touching.
āSo this was the life that took you,ā a voice murmured, amused and contemplative all at once.
āPeaceful,ā the man mused. āAlmost boring.āĀ
He straightened, coat rustling softly. āBut no matter. I shall find you again.āĀ
Somewhere nearby, Dawn Winery stood tall and silentāits master unaware that forces long buried were once again circling something precious.
The grave remained undisturbed.
For now.
And far away, a cycle tightened its gripāpatient, inevitable, and cruel.
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Hello bb! I apologized for asking you on this but, is it just me or there's no fontain in the masterlist? Hehe.
hello no worries!! the masterlist acc doesnāt have fontaine so itās not just you! the reason for that is because i didnāt get to make one before i went on hiatus back then šāāļø i plan to make one soon before i go back to hiatus tho!
When i said don't hold back i clearly did not know what i asked for.
Putting my cleae bias aside as he is my favorite character, Neuvillette's chapter didn't stung me, it cripled my heart into oblivion...
I fear i'm too weak when it comes to men who love silently just to loose their lover within that silence- or worse, to that silence.
Amazing work, it hurt me just right, idk why i keep on coming back regularly, also can't wait to see more!!
never underestimate my ability to make my fav characters suffer (my heart also crippled when i wrote his part) <//3 ty for enjoying my fic!! im flattered that you keep coming back despite the amount of angst š
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this fourth life, life was much kinder and happier to you. Born in the region of songs and wind, you're a shy librarian assistant in the Knights of Favonius' Library, preferring books over people. However, when tasked by Lisa to talk to people and collect their borrowed books, you happen to encounter an extinguished gentleman.
PAIRING. diluc ragnvindr x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, fluff, mentions of illness, major character death, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 3560 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
Unlike your other lives, this one did not begin with prophecy, blood, or brilliance.
It began with dust.
Fine motes of it drifted through the air of the Knights of Favonius Library, illuminated by tall windows and gentle afternoon light. The scent of parchment and ink clung to your clothes more faithfully than any perfume ever could. Your days passed between shelves and ledgers, between the careful turning of pages and the quiet satisfaction of returning books to their rightful places.
It was peaceful.
You liked it that way.
While others sought glory as knights, adventurers, or bards beneath Mondstadtās open sky, you found fulfillment in silence. Stories lived more vividly in your mind than they ever could beyond the city walls. Heroes, dragons, ancient godsāyou met them all through books, safe and sound, with a cup of tea growing cold beside you.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Or so you thought.
āReading again?ā
You startled, nearly dropping the book in your hands as a familiar, amused voice chimed behind you.
āMāMiss Lisa!ā you blurted, snapping the book shut far too quickly. āI didnāt realize you wereā!ā
āLisa, darling,ā she corrected with a laugh, leaning casually over the desk beside you. āIf you keep calling me āmiss,ā I might actually start to feel ancient.ā
You flushed, fingers tightening around the bookās spine. āSāsorryā¦ā
Her eyes flicked down to what you had been reading. āNow,ā she said lightly, āwhat sort of story managed to steal your soul so thoroughly that you didnāt notice your dear old friend approaching?ā
You hesitated, then slid the book toward her. āItās⦠an old journal. Written by an adventurer.ā
Lisaās brows lifted in recognition as she leaned closer. āOh? This one?ā Her smile softened. āI remember this. I found this old thing back when I studied at the Akademiya and managed to find a copy of it to bring it here. It was certainly one of the earliest attempts to document Teyvatās creatures in detail.ā
You nodded, brushing your thumb over the worn leather cover. āIt was one of the first books I ever read. I keep⦠coming back to it.ā
āI can tell,ā Lisa teased gently. āYou always do have a sentimental streak.ā
Then, with the unmistakable tone of someone about to ask for trouble, she straightened. āI need a favor.ā
Your stomach sank immediately.
āI have a lunch engagement I absolutely cannot miss,ā Lisa continued breezily. āNormally, Iād be the one reminding borrowers about overdue booksābut since youāre the only other librarian, Iāll need you to handle it today.ā
You stared at her.
āā¦You mean,ā you said carefully, āgo outside?ā
āYes.ā
āAnd talk to people?ā
āCorrect.ā
She grinned wickedly. āSocialize!āĀ
You were doomed.
And so, by sunset, you found yourself wandering Mondstadt with a list clutched in your hands, heart pounding each time you asked a stranger for books that they borrowed. One by one, you found the namesāuntil only one remained.
The last led you somewhere you dreaded.
Angelās Share.
The tavern was loud, warm, and overwhelmingly alive. Laughter spilled from every table, mugs clinked, and the smell of alcohol made your nose wrinkle instinctively. You kept your head down, weaving carefully through the crowd.
You tapped the nearest man at the counter. āEāexcuse me, have you seenāā
āHah?ā He spun around, eyes glassy. āWhatāre you pokinā me for?ā
āIāIām sorry, I was justāā
āWhatās that got to do with me?!ā he snapped.
You stumbled back. āIām sorry! Iāll justāā
You collided with something solid.
Strong.
Warm.
You gasped, spinning around in panicāonly to freeze.
A tall man stood behind you, crimson hair catching the tavernās light like embers. His gaze was sharp, unyielding, fixed squarely on the drunk man before you.
āWhat seems to be the problem?ā
The voice was calm. Cold. Cutting.
The drunk sobered instantly, muttering excuses before retreating into the crowd.
You exhaled shakily. āI-Iām sorry,ā you rushed, holding up the list. āI was just looking for someone.ā
The red-haired man glanced at the paper without taking it. āā¦They donāt live in the city.ā
You blinked. āā¦Oh.ā
āTheyāre in Springvale,ā he added. āThatās why you couldnāt find them.ā
Your shoulders sagged in relief and embarrassment all at once. āThat explains it⦠Thank you.ā
He checked the time. āYou should go home. Itās late.ā
You followed his gaze, startled. āOhā! Youāre right! I should just visit them tomorrow morning.ā You bowed quickly. āThank you again, mister! Have a good night!ā
You fled before your nerves could betray you further.
It wasnāt until you returned to the libraryāLisa fussing over youāthat you learned his name.
āDiluc Ragnvindr,ā she said knowingly. āHeās the owner of Dawn Winery and operates Angelās Share. Though if you ask me, Iād recommend you talk to someone who knows more about him than I do.ā
You pretended not to care.
Later that night, halfway home, a familiar voice stopped you.
āYou dropped this.ā
You turnedāand there he was, holding your list.Ā
āOh!ā Your face lit up as you took it. āThank you, Mister Diluc! I didnāt even know I lost it!ā
He made no change of expression. āā¦Just Diluc,ā he corrected, āand it's fine. I only happened to find it when I was closing the tavern.ā He said.Ā
You smiled shyly.Ā
And so, he walked you home without another word, steps steady beside yours. It was strange, but you didnāt reject him as you let him walk with you. The silence was something you appreciated from him, as your social battery had already drained down from the amount of people youāve approached for your errand.Ā
But as soon as you finally closed your door, heart racing, cheeks warm after saying goodbye to the red-haired gentleman, you thought to yourself, āmaybe going out wasnāt so bad.āĀ
If your first meeting with Diluc Ragnvindr had been brief and startling, then every meeting after that was⦠quiet.
Not awkwardāno, never that. Just quiet in a way that felt deliberate, as if the world itself lowered its voice whenever the two of you happened to occupy the same space.
At first, they were coincidences.
You saw him early one morning while sweeping fallen leaves near the library steps. He passed by without stopping, coat fastened neatly, expression composed as ever. You lifted your head just in time to catch his gaze flicker toward you.
āā¦Good morning,ā you murmured, barely louder than the rustle of leaves.
āGood morning,ā he replied, voice low, measured.
That was all. He walked on, boots echoing softly against the stone.
Yet your heart lingered in that moment long after he disappeared from view.
Another time, you were crouched not too far from the Knightsā headquarters, breaking bits of bread for the stray dogs that lingered there. They wagged their tails eagerly, noses nudging your hands as you laughed under your breath.
āYouāll spoil them,ā a familiar voice said behind you.
You startled, nearly dropping the bread. āO-Ohā!ā
Diluc stood a few steps away, arms crossed loosely, gaze fixed not on youābut on the dogs.
āThey deserve it,ā you said timidly, offering a piece to the boldest one.
āā¦I suppose they do,ā he conceded.
He stayed without saying anything more. The dogs eventually grew brave enough to approach him too, sniffing his boots before retreating.
You glanced up at him, your smile growing. āThey like you.ā
He huffed quietly. āI doubt that.ā
āThey do,ā you insisted softly. āAnimals can tell.ā
Something unreadable passed through his eyes then. He nodded once, as if accepting a truth he hadnāt expected.
After that, you began noticing him everywhere.
At the market, standing silently while vendors greeted him with respect. At the plaza during quiet afternoons, watching Mondstadt from the edges rather than its center. Sometimes, when you were shelving books near the windows, you swore you could spot a flash of red hair outsideāonly for it to vanish the moment you looked properly.
You never chased him. Never waved. Never forced conversation.
And neither did he.
But slowly, inevitably, silence became something shared.
When you passed him on the street, there would be a nod. A pause. Sometimes, a single sentence.
āHow is the library?ā
āQuiet today.ā
āā¦Good.ā
That was enough.
Weeks turned into months.
Sometimes, he would walk you homeānot always speaking, just matching your pace every time. The night air would be cool, lanterns glowing softly, your steps syncing naturally.
āThank you,ā youād say at your door.
āRest well,ā heād reply.
You would linger, fingers curled against the hem of your sleeves, wishingājust a littleāthat heād say more.
You never asked.
Neither did he.
And yet somehow, you began to fall in love.
It wasnāt sudden as there was no dramatic moment nor a realization that struck like lightning unlike the books youāve read. It was much quieter than that, if not gentler.Ā
It was the way he noticed when you shivered and wordlessly removed his coat to put it around your shoulders. The way he remembered your favorite drink without being told. The way his presence alone made the city feel less overwhelming.
For Diluc, it was similar.
You were calm where his world was sharp. Gentle where his nights were violent. You never asked too much about anything, never pried into his life. You listened when he spoke, and respected his silence just as much.
One evening, as you walked together beneath the stars, you finally spoke what had been hovering between you for months.
āā¦Would you like to come in?ā You asked quietly, standing at your door. āFor tea.ā
He hesitated.
āā¦If you donāt mind, then yes.ā
That night, words came slowly, but they came. You spoke of books, of your childhood, of how you preferred stories to reality. He spoke of responsibility, of Mondstadt, of handling his business while also trying to do his part in protecting Mondstadt.
When he reached for your handāhis hand warm and comfortingāit felt inevitable.Ā
Your relationship bloomed softly through shared mornings, late-night conversations, gentle touches. Laughter whispered rather than shouted. Love that felt like coming home.
And time passed like a dream.
Eventually, you two married beneath Mondstadtās open sky. It was simple, yet heartfelt. Lisa cried openly. Kaeya smiled knowingly. Diluc held your hands as if letting go was unthinkable.
Since then, the two of you have gotten closer than ever.
There were mornings where you would force him to eat breakfast before the two of you could leave for work, much to his resignation, and evenings where he would return to find you waiting by the fireplace with a book in hand despite the late hour.
"You're still awake."
You looked up from your book immediately. "You're late."
"...Work."
"I know." You smiled softly. "Welcome home, Diluc."
He would never admit it aloud, but those two words quickly became his favorite in the world.
You accompanied him through grape fields during harvest seasons, sat beside him during paperwork just to keep him company, and filled Dawn Winery's halls with warmth that had been absent for years. The servants adored you, with Adelinde often remarking that the manor had finally begun feeling alive again.
Eventually, your quiet life became filled with countless little routines that belonged only to the two of you.
Reading together in silence by the fireplace.
Waiting for him after his late-night ventures as the Darknight Hero with bandages already prepared (you later found out about his secret when he came home late at night one time with a few bruises that certainly didnāt belong to any reckless drunkards).Ā
Taking walks around Mondstadt after closing hours.
Listening to you ramble excitedly about books and creatures while he listened with more attention than he ever gave to anything else.
Three years passed like that.
Three peaceful years.
Three happy years.
Diluc had spent so much of his life surrounded by grief and responsibility that he had forgotten what peace felt like until you arrived.
Home stopped being Dawn Winery.
Home became wherever you were.
Until, something changed.Ā
It started small with youāfatigue that lingered too long, dizziness that came too often. Diluc noticed before you did. He always did.
āYouāre having a fever again,ā he said one morning, concern etched deep into his voice as he placed a hand against your forehead.Ā
āIām fine,ā you insisted.
But you werenāt.
The doctorās visit was quiet. Too quiet. Diluc had been insisting on his visit after noting that itās already been more than a week since you started getting more tired and sick.Ā
āā¦Iām sorry,ā the physician said eventually, eyes heavy. āThereās nothing more we can do.ā
From the moment the physician left your chambers, Diluc did not leave your side.
He did not step into the night as the Darknight Hero. He did not come to his office. He did not visit Angelās Share. The world beyond your bed might as well have ceased to exist.
You needed him.Ā
He sat beside you through the long hours when sleep refused to come, your breaths shallow and uneven. When pain stole your strength, he held your hand and whispered reassurances he wasnāt sure you could still hear. He learned the rhythm of your suffering with the way your fingers twitched before the ache set in, the way your brow furrowed when it became too much, and the way you looked so pained.Ā
He wanted nothing more than to take your pain away and bear it himself if it meant he got to see you happy and healthy again.Ā
āIām here,ā he would murmur, again and again, as if repetition could anchor you to the world.
āI wonāt go anywhere.ā
āYouāre not alone.ā
Sometimes you smiled faintly at him, eyes glassy but warm. Other times, you simply stared at the ceiling, exhaustion weighing heavier than words.
On the nights when your fever worsened, he pressed cool towels to your forehead, his hands trembling despite himself. He had faced abyss mages, Fatui agents, and monsters born of shadow without fearābut this helplessness hollowed him out in ways no enemy ever could.
āI should have noticed sooner,ā he whispered once, voice breaking in the quiet room.
āYou always notice,ā you replied weakly, forcing a smile. āThis⦠isnāt something we can fix.ā
He squeezed his eyes shut at that.
Days blurred into one another. You grew lighter in his arms, thinner, fragile as parchment. You no longer had the strength to leave the bed. Even speaking costs you more than it once had.
Yet your mind remained sharp.
One afternoon, sunlight filtering through the curtains, you asked him to open the window. The breeze carried the distant sounds of Mondstadtālaughter, bells, life.
āI used to think,ā you murmured, āthat I was boring.ā
Diluc frowned. āNever.ā
āI didnāt go on adventures. I didnāt fight monsters. I just⦠read.ā
āYou built worlds,ā he said quietly. āYou lived a thousand lives through books.ā
You smiled, eyes drifting toward the shelf across the room.
āDo you remember the journal?ā you asked. āThe adventurer who recorded the creatures of Teyvat?ā
āYes.ā
āI always felt⦠connected to them,ā you continued. āLike they were speaking to me. Like⦠thereās something about them that made me feel like I know them.āĀ
Diluc brushed your hair back gently. āYou donāt have to think about that now.ā
āI want to.ā You insisted softly. āPromise me something.ā
āā¦Anything.ā
āWhen this is over,ā you whispered, ādonāt lock yourself away. Donāt drown in work. Donāt burn yourself out at night.ā
He swallowed. āI wonāt.ā
āYou will.ā You breathed. āSo⦠You should travel. See the world. I know youāve done it before and youāre not allowed to come to Snezhnaya, but⦠I think traveling will do you good.ā
His voice shook. āWeāll go together.ā
You looked at him thenātruly looked at himāwith a sadness so deep it hurt to witness.
āā¦You know I canāt.ā
Silence fell heavy between you.
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against yours. āThen Iāll go,ā he whispered. āAnd Iāll tell you everything when I come back.ā
You exhaled softly, content. āā¦Iād like that.ā
That night, your breathing slowed.
Diluc noticed immediately.
āHey,ā he said quietly, sitting upright. āStay with me.ā
Your eyes fluttered open, unfocused. You smiled faintly.
āDilucā¦ā
āIām here.ā
āThank you,ā you whispered. āFor choosing me.ā
Tears slipped down his cheeks before he could stop them. āThere was never a choice. Itās always been you.ā
Your hand slackened in his grasp.
And just like thatā
You were gone.
The scream that tore from his chest never left the room.
The funeral passed like a nightmare he couldnāt wake from.
Flowers, condolences, soft voicesāall meaningless. The city mourned quietly, respectfully. Everyone came. Everyone cried, most especially Lisa, your dearest friend who had watched you bloom and love like no other.Ā
Kaeya stood near Diluc, watching, observing, but never spoke a word.Ā
Diluc stood still.
Unmoving.
That night, he returned to your chambers alone.
The bed was cold. Too large.
He sat where you used to read, staring at the bookshelf until his gaze landed on the familiar, worn journal. With shaking hands, he picked it up.
The journal was your āsomething oldā given by Lisa on your wedding day. He remembered rushing to your assigned room before the wedding worriedly when he heard your sobs and cries, only to relax when he realized they were tears of joy. He knew how much the book meant to you, how it stayed with you throughout your childhood to adulthood.Ā
And now, the journal became your memory.Ā
Diluc did not sleep that night.
He sat in the armchair beside the bookshelf until dawn threatened the horizon, the adventurerās journal heavy in his hands. Candle wax pooled uselessly on the table; he hadnāt noticed when the flame burned low, or when it finally died.
Page after page, he read.
The handwriting was neat but lively, filled with curiosity that bled through every careful line. Notes about creaturesātheir habits, their calls, the way they reacted to kindness rather than force. Small personal remarks slipped between observations.
Day by day, I grew eager to finish this book and come back to my home. My dear readers, if I can find my own home, then so can you.Ā
Dilucās throat tightened.
Finally, he reached the final entryāthe one that was cut off abruptly, mid-thought, as if the writer had been pulled away before they could finish. The last page was the publisher informing about how the original journal was found in Snezhnaya in the writerās campsite that had most of their things, and it seemed they had died from an illness before they could complete it.Ā
He then turned the page, and his breath immediately caught.Ā
The illustration greeted him in silence.
It was not identical. It shouldnāt have been. The clothes were unfamiliar, the setting foreign, the era wrong.
But the eyesā
Dilucās fingers trembled as they traced the page.
The shape of the eyes. The softness of the smile that seemed to carry both wonder and melancholy. The way curiosity shone through the drawing as if the artist had captured a soul rather than a face.
His breath hitched.
āNoā¦ā he whispered.
The author⦠looks like you.Ā
The resemblance was undeniable. Subtle enough that a stranger might dismiss it, but Diluc was no stranger. He knew every expression you woreāevery smile you tried to hide, every thoughtful gaze when you were lost in a book.
āThis isnāt possible,ā he said hoarsely, though the words rang hollow.
Memories resurfaced unbiddenāyour fascination with this journal, the way you spoke of the adventurer as if they were someone you missed. The longing in your voice when you spoke of lands you had never seen.
Or perhaps⦠had.
His attention remained fixed on the page, heart pounding as a single thought took root.
ONE WEEK LATER
Jean adjusted the papers on her desk, exhaustion evident in the tight set of her jaw. Reports had been piling up far too quickly for the past few daysātoo many incidents, too many unsettling patterns.
Her gaze paused on one document in particular.
Fatui activity increasing near Dawn Winery.
She frowned.
It was unusual. The winery was well-guarded, discreet, andāuntil recentlyāof little strategic interest to the Fatui. Yet sightings had surged. Scouts reported unfamiliar agents lingering near the outskirts. Some claimed they had seen figures near the vineyard at odd hours, always vanishing before they could be confronted.
Jean exhaled slowly.
āā¦This timing,ā she murmured.
She reached for another report.
Unidentified individual observed near a civilian grave. Repeated visits. No signs of theft or vandalism. Purpose unknown.
Her grip tightened.
She stood abruptly, chair scraping softly against the floor. She knew who to talk to.Ā
Outside, the wind stirred the trees of Mondstadtāgentle, mourning.
Far beyond the city walls, near the quiet resting place beneath the shade of old oaks, the air felt wrong. Too still. Too watchful.
Boots pressed into the earth where flowers had been laid not long ago.
A gloved hand hovered above a grave, not touchingānever touching.
āSo this was the life that took you,ā a voice murmured, amused and contemplative all at once.
āPeaceful,ā the man mused. āAlmost boring.āĀ
He straightened, coat rustling softly. āBut no matter. I shall find you again.āĀ
Somewhere nearby, Dawn Winery stood tall and silentāits master unaware that forces long buried were once again circling something precious.
The grave remained undisturbed.
For now.
And far away, a cycle tightened its gripāpatient, inevitable, and cruel.
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this third life, you were born in the beautiful region of Hydro renowned as the cultural and technological hub of Teyvat and its theatrical trials. Here, you're known as one of the best performers, to the point where you even caught the attention of the Iudex himself.
PAIRING. neuvillette x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, mentions of suicide, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 2167 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
As an ancient Fontainian playwright once wrote, all the worldās a stage.Ā
And in Fontaine, nowhere embodied those words better than the Opera Epiclese.
The grand theater was not merely a place for trials and justice. It was the beating heart of Fontaine itself, where joy and sorrow, comedy and tragedy, reality and fiction all met beneath its magnificent chandeliers.
You belonged there.
Among Fontaineās stars, none shone brighter than you. Blessed with a voice that could move audiences to tears, you quickly became Fontaine's darling. Newspapers hailed you as Fontaine's Shining Star, while nobles and common folk alike crowded the Opera Epiclese whenever your name appeared on a program.
But fame has never changed you.
Off-stage, you remained warm and approachable, often sharing tea with stagehands, encouraging younger performers, and bringing homemade desserts for your crew.
Even Furina herself adored you. And because Furina adored youā
Neuvillette eventually became acquainted with your performances.
"Neuvillette, you absolutely must come!" Furina declared one afternoon. "They're marvelous! Their voice alone is enough to make even the dullest audience cry!"
The Chief Justice paused from reviewing documents.
"Is that so?"
"Indeed! Their story is inspiring, they're beloved by everyone, and they're not one of those prideful divas either. Ah, they simply must perform for my birthday one year."
Thus, at Furina's insistence, Neuvillette attended.
He had not expected much.
After all, his understanding of art and performance was limited. Human emotions still remained difficult for him to comprehend.
Yet as your voice filled the opera houseā
Something within him stirred.
The joy in your songs.
The grief hidden within your tragedies.
The hope that resonated through every note.
He found himself observing the audience almost as much as he observed you.
He watched people laugh, cry, smile, and even embrace one another.
And somehowā
Through your performancesā
He began to understand.
After the curtains closed, he remained seated longer than necessary.
"Monsieur Neuvillette?"
One of the attendants approached cautiously.
"...The performance has ended."
"...Yes."
Yet his gaze lingered upon the empty stage.
"It was beautiful."
And perhaps, for the first time in centuriesā
He had a deeper understanding on why humans treasured art so much.
He returned for the next performance. And the one after that.
You noticed him, of course.Ā
It was hard not to. His presence carried weight, authority that hummed quietly rather than announced itself. He never applauded excessively, never smiled broadly. But you had performed long enough to recognize appreciation when you saw it.
The gleam in his eyes never wavered.
Your colleagues teased you relentlessly.
āThe Iudex again?ā
āYouāve caught quite the admirer.ā
You laughed it off, but secretly, you felt giddy. There was something thrilling about knowing someone like him came to watch youāand no one else.
You found yourself searching for him whenever the curtains opened. And each time you spotted his familiar figure seated belowā
Your heart leapt.
Not because he smiledāhe rarely did, but because his eyes did.
Subtle though they were, you learned to recognize the soft gleam hidden within them. And somehow, that was enough.
Neuvillette himself was unaware of what he was doing. He simply wished to express his appreciation.
It was Furinaās idea that he should give you gifts if he loved your performances that much.Ā
āFans do that to show their appreciation!ā She explained. āIt can be anythingāanything at all! You can even write a letter to them.āĀ
And so, flowers began appearing in your dressing room. Alongside some exquisite teas, rare waters collected during his travels, jewelry, books, and sometimes peculiar trinkets that he personally found interesting.
And alwaysā
A letter.
Your performance was remarkable.I found the second act particularly moving.Your voice reminds me of rainfall against stoneāpersistent, and sincere.
You read each one carefully, fingers lingering on the ink. They were so simple, yet so sincere. They warmed you in ways applause never could.Ā
Eventually, you wrote back.Ā
That was how you gained your first pen pal.
You guarded those letters fiercely, tucking them away where no oneānot even the ever-watchful Steambirdācould find them.Ā
They were too precious. Too personal. Something worth keeping secret.
Then came his birthday.
And with it: a performance dedicated entirely to him.
He had not expected it. Nor the overwhelming applause. Nor the sight of you smiling directly toward his seat.
And afterward, as rain softly fell outside Fontaine, he sat at his desk and wrote a letter unlike any before.
His pen hesitated.
Several drafts were discarded.
Until finallyā
"Would you do me the honor of accompanying me to dinner?"
To his surpriseā
Your answer arrived the same night.
"I'd be delighted."
Neither of you realized how nervous the other truly was.
You spent hours choosing your attire.
Meanwhile, Neuvillette received advice from several Melusines.
And somehowā
Their suggestions only worsened his predicament.
"You should hold hands!"
"You should compliment their eyes!"
"You should bring sauce!"
"...Sauce?"
And when you finally met, you nearly burst into laughter.
Because for all his elegance and dignity,
Neuvillette looked genuinely nervous.
"Good evening," he greeted.
"Good evening."
A pause.
"...I hope this establishment is satisfactory."
"It is."
Another pause.
āShall we?ā He asked with a gentle smile, offering you his arm.Ā
The date surprised you both. Conversation flowed easilyāabout music, about Fontaine, about water and how it remembered everything it touched. You learned of his appreciation for rivers and rain; he learned of your love for stories and the way the stage felt like freedom.
He walked you home that night. No kiss marked the end of that evening, nor some grand confession. Just quiet conversations.
And the gentle promise of another meeting.
Yet both of you understood. Something had changed between you two.
Soon, letters became visits, visits became walks, walks became companionship.
And companionship blossomed into love.
Though hidden from the public eye, your relationship flourished quietly through private dinners, shared letters, long evenings discussing stories and emotions, and simply with each otherās presence.Ā
Sometimes, Neuvillette simply listened to you speak. Because listening to you had become one of his favorite things.
And in returnā
You taught him many things. How to celebrate birthdays, how to enjoy festivals, how to recognize embarrassment, and perhaps most importantly,Ā
How to love.
Until the day everything shattered.
The case file appeared on Neuvillette's desk without warning.
You had been arrested for murder.
The victim was a junior opera singer. The evidence was overwhelming. A witness. Blood staining your costume. And the murder weaponāa trophy engraved with your nameāembedded in the young woman's chest.
The Steambird erupted.
Rumors spread through Fontaine like wildfire.
Neuvillette was forbidden from seeing you before the trial. By law, only your legal counsel was permitted access. Though every instinct urged him otherwise, he honored protocol.
Because he had to.
And because somewhere within him lingered the hopeāthe desperate hopeāthat the truth would prevail.
When the day of the trial came, he scarcely recognized you. Gone was the radiant star of the Opera Epiclese. In your place stood someone exhausted. Sleepless.
Your once immaculate appearance had fallen into disarray. Dark circles shadowed your eyes. Your hands trembled faintly where they rested. You looked smaller somehow. Yet still, you stood tall.
And seeing you like thatā
Seeing you standing where countless criminals had once stoodā
Seeing you trying to stay brave despite knowing that deep down, you're scaredā
Made his heart ache.
The proceedings continued. With all the witnesses, evidence, speculation, motive, jealousy, and ambition, every piece fell neatly into place.
Too neatly.
Even your attorney couldn't defend you even when they're the best of the best, it's as if everything is against your favor.
Beneath the judge's desk, Neuvillette's hand tightened.
"...What was the argument about?"
His voice echoed across the Opera Epiclese, addressing you to respond.
For the first time since entering the courtroom, you raised your head.
And your eyes found his.
"We argued over something important to me," is all you could say.
Murmurs erupted. Of course, the audience thought they understood. You could be talking about your fame, your spotlight, or your role.
But Neuvillette knew it had never been about any of those things.
It had been about him.
And in choosing silence, you had chosen to protect him.
He wanted to ask you to explain.Ā
To tell the court.
To tell the truth.
But the Chief Justice of Fontaine could not ask such things. So he remained silent.
And finally, the Oratrice rendered its verdict.
Guilty.
It was a word Neuvillette had spoken countless times throughout his life.
Measured.
Impartial.
Absolute.
But when it was spoken to youā
It sounded so, so, so wrong.
As though something deep within Fontaine itself had fallen out of harmony. Yet even then, you did not cry.
You merely lowered your head.Ā
And when the guards approached, you offered a perfect bow. The same bow with which you had once concluded your performances.
Neuvillette remained seated, not because he wished to, but because duty demanded it.
Only Furina noticed the way his fingers dug into the armrest, and the slight tremble hidden beneath his composure.
You were transferred to a temporary holding cell within the Palais Mermonia, where you would remain until your departure for the Fortress of Meropide.
Neuvillette personally ensured that you would be treated with dignity with no unnecessary cruelty, no mistreatment, and no indignity beyond the sentence itself.
It was the only mercy he could still offer.
Your only request was paper and ink.
And sometime during the night, you wrote a single letter. It was short.
The guards discovered it the next morning.
There are many things I fear.Ā But I fear that one day, you will stop visiting the Opera.
I fear that you will no longer taste the waters of Fontaine and tell me what stories they carry.
And most of allā
I fear that you will forget the songs I sang for you.
So pleaseā¦Ā
Remember me kindly. Not as I am now. But as I was when I stood beneath the lights and sang for you.
No one knew who you were addressing, all except Neuvillette himself.Ā
And that same morningā
You were gone.
No signs of struggle.
No broken locks.
No blood.
No escape route.
Only an empty cell.
Your belongings remained untouched.
And upon the stone floor lingered a strange scent thatās medical and foreign.Ā
It faded almost as quickly as it had appeared.
Neuvillette arrived shortly thereafter. He stood silently in the doorway, listening to the guards who nervously explained their patrol routes and procedures, swearing their innocence.
Slowly, he stepped inside.Ā
Something had disturbed the place.
Not enough to leave a trace, but enough for Neuvillette to understand that something had happened that led you to disappear.
Something foreign.
Something that did not belong to Fontaine.
"Seal this area," he said quietly. "No one is to speak of this."
And so the search began.
Weeks passed. Nothing.
Months. Nothing.
Your home remained untouched, except for one peculiar detail.
Every letter Neuvillette had ever written to you had vanished.
He kept that fact to himself.
The Steambird published theories daily.
You couldāve somehow escaped with your connections, you couldāve ran for a bit and committed suicide somewhere where no one could find you, you couldāve had an accompliceāor a secret lover.Ā
Yet none could explain why your trail simply ended.
Meanwhile, strange rumors surfaced in the darker corners of Fontaine. Of foreign researchers requesting unusual access to Meropide, of Fatui diplomats asking peculiar questions about performers, of an elegant man with unsettling eyes showing interest inĀ a certain singer.Ā
Until eventually, such reports disappeared. Informants withdrew their statements, records were amended, witnesses suddenly remembered nothing. Only one name surfaced more than once.
Always redacted.
Always followed by silence.
But the pattern was unmistakable.Ā
The Fatui were involved.
Yet patterns alone were not evidence.
And without evidenceā
The Chief Justice of Fontaine could do nothing.
So Fontaine moved on. Your name disappeared from programs, your roles were recast, the case was deemed solved, and the Oratrice remained infallible.
Only Neuvillette remembered.Ā
He attended the Opera Epiclese one final time.
A new performer sang your aria.
Technically flawless. And utterly empty.
He never returned.
Years passed. New stars rose, new songs and performances filled the stage, yet none could compare to the star he had admired, or the person he had quietly loved.
And every week, without fail, Neuvillette wrote you a letter. He sealed each one carefully, addressing them nowhere.
The rain has persisted today.
Lady Furina insisted I take tea with her.
You wouldāve loved the traveler and their companion.Ā
I still hear your voice in places where there should only be silence.
They piled upon his desk.Ā
Unread.
Unanswered.
And sometimes, in the quiet hours of the night, he would find himself turning at the sound of imagined footsteps.
Only to find the room empty.
And beyond the windows of the Palais Mermoniaā
The rain continued to fall.
As though Fontaine itself mourned with him.
And somewhere beyond the reach of judgment, beyond the grasp of memory and timeā
You lived again.
Unaware that a man who had never once begged for anything in his long existence now prayed to the silence you had left behind.
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this third life, you were born in the beautiful region of Hydro renowned as the cultural and technological hub of Teyvat and its theatrical trials. Here, you're known as one of the best performers, to the point where you even caught the attention of the Iudex himself.
PAIRING. neuvillette x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, mentions of suicide, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 2167 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
As an ancient Fontainian playwright once wrote, all the worldās a stage.Ā
And in Fontaine, nowhere embodied those words better than the Opera Epiclese.
The grand theater was not merely a place for trials and justice. It was the beating heart of Fontaine itself, where joy and sorrow, comedy and tragedy, reality and fiction all met beneath its magnificent chandeliers.
You belonged there.
Among Fontaineās stars, none shone brighter than you. Blessed with a voice that could move audiences to tears, you quickly became Fontaine's darling. Newspapers hailed you as Fontaine's Shining Star, while nobles and common folk alike crowded the Opera Epiclese whenever your name appeared on a program.
But fame has never changed you.
Off-stage, you remained warm and approachable, often sharing tea with stagehands, encouraging younger performers, and bringing homemade desserts for your crew.
Even Furina herself adored you. And because Furina adored youā
Neuvillette eventually became acquainted with your performances.
"Neuvillette, you absolutely must come!" Furina declared one afternoon. "They're marvelous! Their voice alone is enough to make even the dullest audience cry!"
The Chief Justice paused from reviewing documents.
"Is that so?"
"Indeed! Their story is inspiring, they're beloved by everyone, and they're not one of those prideful divas either. Ah, they simply must perform for my birthday one year."
Thus, at Furina's insistence, Neuvillette attended.
He had not expected much.
After all, his understanding of art and performance was limited. Human emotions still remained difficult for him to comprehend.
Yet as your voice filled the opera houseā
Something within him stirred.
The joy in your songs.
The grief hidden within your tragedies.
The hope that resonated through every note.
He found himself observing the audience almost as much as he observed you.
He watched people laugh, cry, smile, and even embrace one another.
And somehowā
Through your performancesā
He began to understand.
After the curtains closed, he remained seated longer than necessary.
"Monsieur Neuvillette?"
One of the attendants approached cautiously.
"...The performance has ended."
"...Yes."
Yet his gaze lingered upon the empty stage.
"It was beautiful."
And perhaps, for the first time in centuriesā
He had a deeper understanding on why humans treasured art so much.
He returned for the next performance. And the one after that.
You noticed him, of course.Ā
It was hard not to. His presence carried weight, authority that hummed quietly rather than announced itself. He never applauded excessively, never smiled broadly. But you had performed long enough to recognize appreciation when you saw it.
The gleam in his eyes never wavered.
Your colleagues teased you relentlessly.
āThe Iudex again?ā
āYouāve caught quite the admirer.ā
You laughed it off, but secretly, you felt giddy. There was something thrilling about knowing someone like him came to watch youāand no one else.
You found yourself searching for him whenever the curtains opened. And each time you spotted his familiar figure seated belowā
Your heart leapt.
Not because he smiledāhe rarely did, but because his eyes did.
Subtle though they were, you learned to recognize the soft gleam hidden within them. And somehow, that was enough.
Neuvillette himself was unaware of what he was doing. He simply wished to express his appreciation.
It was Furinaās idea that he should give you gifts if he loved your performances that much.Ā
āFans do that to show their appreciation!ā She explained. āIt can be anythingāanything at all! You can even write a letter to them.āĀ
And so, flowers began appearing in your dressing room. Alongside some exquisite teas, rare waters collected during his travels, jewelry, books, and sometimes peculiar trinkets that he personally found interesting.
And alwaysā
A letter.
Your performance was remarkable.I found the second act particularly moving.Your voice reminds me of rainfall against stoneāpersistent, and sincere.
You read each one carefully, fingers lingering on the ink. They were so simple, yet so sincere. They warmed you in ways applause never could.Ā
Eventually, you wrote back.Ā
That was how you gained your first pen pal.
You guarded those letters fiercely, tucking them away where no oneānot even the ever-watchful Steambirdācould find them.Ā
They were too precious. Too personal. Something worth keeping secret.
Then came his birthday.
And with it: a performance dedicated entirely to him.
He had not expected it. Nor the overwhelming applause. Nor the sight of you smiling directly toward his seat.
And afterward, as rain softly fell outside Fontaine, he sat at his desk and wrote a letter unlike any before.
His pen hesitated.
Several drafts were discarded.
Until finallyā
"Would you do me the honor of accompanying me to dinner?"
To his surpriseā
Your answer arrived the same night.
"I'd be delighted."
Neither of you realized how nervous the other truly was.
You spent hours choosing your attire.
Meanwhile, Neuvillette received advice from several Melusines.
And somehowā
Their suggestions only worsened his predicament.
"You should hold hands!"
"You should compliment their eyes!"
"You should bring sauce!"
"...Sauce?"
And when you finally met, you nearly burst into laughter.
Because for all his elegance and dignity,
Neuvillette looked genuinely nervous.
"Good evening," he greeted.
"Good evening."
A pause.
"...I hope this establishment is satisfactory."
"It is."
Another pause.
āShall we?ā He asked with a gentle smile, offering you his arm.Ā
The date surprised you both. Conversation flowed easilyāabout music, about Fontaine, about water and how it remembered everything it touched. You learned of his appreciation for rivers and rain; he learned of your love for stories and the way the stage felt like freedom.
He walked you home that night. No kiss marked the end of that evening, nor some grand confession. Just quiet conversations.
And the gentle promise of another meeting.
Yet both of you understood. Something had changed between you two.
Soon, letters became visits, visits became walks, walks became companionship.
And companionship blossomed into love.
Though hidden from the public eye, your relationship flourished quietly through private dinners, shared letters, long evenings discussing stories and emotions, and simply with each otherās presence.Ā
Sometimes, Neuvillette simply listened to you speak. Because listening to you had become one of his favorite things.
And in returnā
You taught him many things. How to celebrate birthdays, how to enjoy festivals, how to recognize embarrassment, and perhaps most importantly,Ā
How to love.
Until the day everything shattered.
The case file appeared on Neuvillette's desk without warning.
You had been arrested for murder.
The victim was a junior opera singer. The evidence was overwhelming. A witness. Blood staining your costume. And the murder weaponāa trophy engraved with your nameāembedded in the young woman's chest.
The Steambird erupted.
Rumors spread through Fontaine like wildfire.
Neuvillette was forbidden from seeing you before the trial. By law, only your legal counsel was permitted access. Though every instinct urged him otherwise, he honored protocol.
Because he had to.
And because somewhere within him lingered the hopeāthe desperate hopeāthat the truth would prevail.
When the day of the trial came, he scarcely recognized you. Gone was the radiant star of the Opera Epiclese. In your place stood someone exhausted. Sleepless.
Your once immaculate appearance had fallen into disarray. Dark circles shadowed your eyes. Your hands trembled faintly where they rested. You looked smaller somehow. Yet still, you stood tall.
And seeing you like thatā
Seeing you standing where countless criminals had once stoodā
Seeing you trying to stay brave despite knowing that deep down, you're scaredā
Made his heart ache.
The proceedings continued. With all the witnesses, evidence, speculation, motive, jealousy, and ambition, every piece fell neatly into place.
Too neatly.
Even your attorney couldn't defend you even when they're the best of the best, it's as if everything is against your favor.
Beneath the judge's desk, Neuvillette's hand tightened.
"...What was the argument about?"
His voice echoed across the Opera Epiclese, addressing you to respond.
For the first time since entering the courtroom, you raised your head.
And your eyes found his.
"We argued over something important to me," is all you could say.
Murmurs erupted. Of course, the audience thought they understood. You could be talking about your fame, your spotlight, or your role.
But Neuvillette knew it had never been about any of those things.
It had been about him.
And in choosing silence, you had chosen to protect him.
He wanted to ask you to explain.Ā
To tell the court.
To tell the truth.
But the Chief Justice of Fontaine could not ask such things. So he remained silent.
And finally, the Oratrice rendered its verdict.
Guilty.
It was a word Neuvillette had spoken countless times throughout his life.
Measured.
Impartial.
Absolute.
But when it was spoken to youā
It sounded so, so, so wrong.
As though something deep within Fontaine itself had fallen out of harmony. Yet even then, you did not cry.
You merely lowered your head.Ā
And when the guards approached, you offered a perfect bow. The same bow with which you had once concluded your performances.
Neuvillette remained seated, not because he wished to, but because duty demanded it.
Only Furina noticed the way his fingers dug into the armrest, and the slight tremble hidden beneath his composure.
You were transferred to a temporary holding cell within the Palais Mermonia, where you would remain until your departure for the Fortress of Meropide.
Neuvillette personally ensured that you would be treated with dignity with no unnecessary cruelty, no mistreatment, and no indignity beyond the sentence itself.
It was the only mercy he could still offer.
Your only request was paper and ink.
And sometime during the night, you wrote a single letter. It was short.
The guards discovered it the next morning.
There are many things I fear.Ā But I fear that one day, you will stop visiting the Opera.
I fear that you will no longer taste the waters of Fontaine and tell me what stories they carry.
And most of allā
I fear that you will forget the songs I sang for you.
So pleaseā¦Ā
Remember me kindly. Not as I am now. But as I was when I stood beneath the lights and sang for you.
No one knew who you were addressing, all except Neuvillette himself.Ā
And that same morningā
You were gone.
No signs of struggle.
No broken locks.
No blood.
No escape route.
Only an empty cell.
Your belongings remained untouched.
And upon the stone floor lingered a strange scent thatās medical and foreign.Ā
It faded almost as quickly as it had appeared.
Neuvillette arrived shortly thereafter. He stood silently in the doorway, listening to the guards who nervously explained their patrol routes and procedures, swearing their innocence.
Slowly, he stepped inside.Ā
Something had disturbed the place.
Not enough to leave a trace, but enough for Neuvillette to understand that something had happened that led you to disappear.
Something foreign.
Something that did not belong to Fontaine.
"Seal this area," he said quietly. "No one is to speak of this."
And so the search began.
Weeks passed. Nothing.
Months. Nothing.
Your home remained untouched, except for one peculiar detail.
Every letter Neuvillette had ever written to you had vanished.
He kept that fact to himself.
The Steambird published theories daily.
You couldāve somehow escaped with your connections, you couldāve ran for a bit and committed suicide somewhere where no one could find you, you couldāve had an accompliceāor a secret lover.Ā
Yet none could explain why your trail simply ended.
Meanwhile, strange rumors surfaced in the darker corners of Fontaine. Of foreign researchers requesting unusual access to Meropide, of Fatui diplomats asking peculiar questions about performers, of an elegant man with unsettling eyes showing interest inĀ a certain singer.Ā
Until eventually, such reports disappeared. Informants withdrew their statements, records were amended, witnesses suddenly remembered nothing. Only one name surfaced more than once.
Always redacted.
Always followed by silence.
But the pattern was unmistakable.Ā
The Fatui were involved.
Yet patterns alone were not evidence.
And without evidenceā
The Chief Justice of Fontaine could do nothing.
So Fontaine moved on. Your name disappeared from programs, your roles were recast, the case was deemed solved, and the Oratrice remained infallible.
Only Neuvillette remembered.Ā
He attended the Opera Epiclese one final time.
A new performer sang your aria.
Technically flawless. And utterly empty.
He never returned.
Years passed. New stars rose, new songs and performances filled the stage, yet none could compare to the star he had admired, or the person he had quietly loved.
And every week, without fail, Neuvillette wrote you a letter. He sealed each one carefully, addressing them nowhere.
The rain has persisted today.
Lady Furina insisted I take tea with her.
You wouldāve loved the traveler and their companion.Ā
I still hear your voice in places where there should only be silence.
They piled upon his desk.Ā
Unread.
Unanswered.
And sometimes, in the quiet hours of the night, he would find himself turning at the sound of imagined footsteps.
Only to find the room empty.
And beyond the windows of the Palais Mermoniaā
The rain continued to fall.
As though Fontaine itself mourned with him.
And somewhere beyond the reach of judgment, beyond the grasp of memory and timeā
You lived again.
Unaware that a man who had never once begged for anything in his long existence now prayed to the silence you had left behind.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
ā Live Streamingā Interactive Chatā Private Showsā HD Qualityā Free Actions
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ADDRESSED. varka, jean, wanderer, baizhu, and zhongli (x gn!reader)
STAMPS. hungry hearts diner au wherein you manage your grandfather's restaurant in your hometown and meet different customers with different stories to tell (all parts are connected but you can read them separately!)
CONTENT. fluff, angst with comfort, major character death, mentions of overworking, possibly ooc with grammar errors!
LINKS. masterlist \ taglist
In a tiny side street in a nameless neighborhood sits an old diner that welcomes all travelers and customers needing a hot meal. Slide the door open and you shall be greeted by a kindly young person rather than a grumpy and busy old man. Said grumpy old man is actually the young personās grandfather, who the young person had come to his aid in managing the restaurant after taking a break from the busy life of the city.
So take a seat, order a hot meal, and let the tension flow out of you. The peace will do you good.Ā
You sighed, looking through your grandfather's old notebooks that contained the recipes of his beloved restaurant, carefully taking note of certain ingredients and techniques used.
Honestly, when your grandfather called you for the first time in months asking for help due to his illness, you thought he meant help in taking care of himānot his restaurant!
Still, it was rare for your grandfather to even ask for anything, and truth be told, you had missed your hometown dearly. So, seeing no reason to refuse, you packed your things and returned to the quiet little neighborhood you once called home.
After all, taking over an old diner for a while couldn't be that difficult.
Right?
On the first day, one of the customers who came to your restaurant calls himself Varka.
Youāve come to learn from one of your elderly customers that Varka is currently the community leader of the neighborhood, often found roaming around the streets and helping everyone who needs it as he often does his best to ensure the neighborhood is safe and happy.
When he first came in, he was expecting to be greeted by your grumpy grandfather, only to be shocked when he saw you instead. You didnāt even realize the broad and muscular blonde man is the infamous Varka himself until he introduced himself. From how much the grannies and children praised him, you thought Varka was an old man.
After you introduced yourself in return, Varka was delighted, as he often heard of you from your grandfather
āWhy donāt I give you a tour? To help you catch up with what youāve missed since you last came?ā
It didnāt take long before he became your frequent customer. His order is always a hearty meal accompanied by alcohol, often asking for seconds.
Each time he visits, he is joyous as ever, greeting the customers before sitting down on the stool in front of the counter where he can watch you prepare meals. He talks about his daily errands, how much work there is to do, how he had stopped another conflict between two particular neighbors, and how kids are getting bigger and bigger each day.
Varka is beloved by everyone in the neighborhood.
The grandmothers often stuff homemade snacks into his hands, while children excitedly run over to him whenever he passes by.
Whenever there is trouble, everyoneās first thought is always the same.
āCall Varka.ā
Stray cats stuck on trees? Call Varka.
A couple having an argument? Call Varka.
Festival preparations? Call Varka.
Carrying heavy groceries? Call Varka.
Varka always responds with a cheerful smile.
āLeave it to me!ā
Sometimes, while eating, his phone rings over and over again.
Despite sighing dramatically, he never once refuses.
āAh, duty calls!ā
You quickly come to realize that the community leader practically works twenty-four hours a day.Ā Ā
Despite how busy he is, he never misses a visit to the restaurant.
Sometimes he arrives with dirt on his clothes after helping someone push their car all the way to the nearest gas station.Ā
Sometimes with scratches after rescuing a cat.
Once, he came drenched in rain after helping an elderly resident whose roof had begun leaking.
And every single time, he greets you with the same smile.
āEvening! Smells wonderful in here!ā
It becomes a habit for you to prepare his favorite dishes whenever he drops by.
To your surprise, Varka remembers your favorite snacks too.
Whenever he discovers a new addition to the local bakery or receives gifts from the neighborhood grandmothers, he often shares them with you.
āCan't let all these sweets go to waste, right?ā
The regular customers often tease the two of you.
āLook at that, Varka's already making himself at home.ā
āYou youngsters are cute.ā
āMaybe we'll hear wedding bells before long!ā
Varka merely laughs loudly while you become embarrassed.Ā
āWhoa there, letās not get hasty!ā He replied.Ā
However, as months pass, you begin noticing something strange.
Although Varka knows everyoneā¦
Nobody seems to know much about him.
People ask about his health in passing, but conversations quickly return to their own problems.
Everyone depends on him, praises him, and loves him.
Yet even so, nobody ever asks what he wants, how his day went, or whether he was tired.
One night, when business was slow, you find Varka sitting alone at the counter.
The usual smile on his face is absent.
Instead, he quietly stares into his untouched drink.
āLong day?ā you ask.
He chuckles.
āLong life, more like.ā
For once, he doesn't talk about the neighborhood.
He doesn't talk about work.
He doesn't talk about anyone else.
He simply watches you cook.
After a long silence, he softly says:
āFunny, isn't it?ā
āI've lived here for decades, watched kids grow up, helped people get married, seen neighbors become grandparents. But when I come homeā¦ā
He stays silent for a moment. āIt's always quiet.ā
He laughs afterward, as though trying to brush away his own words.
āHaha! Listen to me sounding all gloomy. Guess even I get sentimental.ā
You can't help but feel that, despite all the laughter surrounding himā¦
Varka has been lonely for a very, very long time.
You talk about it with your grandfather after helping him get to bed, only for your grandfather to let out a huff.
āAh, that rascal? He has always been alone. Even back when I first met him, he was already running around helping everyone. I used to tell him to slow down and enjoy his youth. Did he listen?āĀ
Your grandfather snorts, before continuing, āof course not.ā
āAlways saying things like, āSomeone's got to do it!āā He clicks his tongue at the thought. āBrat nearly worked himself into the grave more times than I can count.ā
Curious, you ask if Varka has any family.
Your grandfather becomes unusually quiet.
āNot anymore. Lost his parents at a young age. And he never married or found anyone special either. All because he was too busy. Busy helping this neighborhood and everyone else. Before he knew it, the years had passed.ā
Your grandfather sighs.
āThe fool practically raised half the kids around here. He fixed roofs, settled arguments, carried groceries, stayed up all night during storms checking on people, never asked for anything in return, and somehowā¦ā
He crosses his arms.
āThat idiot became everyone's family. Except nobody ever realized he didn't have one of his own.ā
You quietly recall how Varka always talks about everyone else's lives.
But never his own.
āDoesn't he have close friends?ā You ask.
āHm.ā Your grandfather nodded. āPlenty. But friendship's a funny thing.ā
āPeople come and go. Some move away. Some get busy with life. Othersā¦ā
Your grandfather glances out the window.
āWell⦠Life happens.ā
He hesitated for a moment. āBut every evening, rain or shine⦠That rascal always came here. Sat right by the stool in front of the counter, ordered enough food for three people,Ā talked about work, and made me listen to his stories before leaving.āĀ
Your grandfather chuckles softly.
āTruth be told, I think this old restaurant was his refuge. A place where nobody needed him to be some hero and leader heās expected to be.āĀ
He then looks at you knowingly.
āAnd you know⦠Ever since you came back⦠He's smiling differently. That rascal used to come and eat before leaving. Now? I can see him lingering, talking more, laughing louder. And sometimes I catch him staring into the kitchen with the strangest look I've ever seen.ā
He laughs. āHah⦠Hopeless fool.ā
Your grandfather settles himself under the blankets.
When you turned off the lights, he spoke up once again, this time in a serious tone.Ā
āTake good care of him.āĀ
You paused, staying still to listen.Ā
The old man looks up at the ceiling, a thoughtful look plastered on his face. āPeople like Varka⦠They'll spend their whole lives taking care of others. But they don't know how to ask for someone to take care of them.ā
After a moment, your grandfather mutters one final thing.
āHe's a good man. Far too good.ā
ā...And good people deserve a place to feel at peace.ā
After that night, you begin paying more attention to Varka.
Just as he notices when your ingredients are running low or when you've had a long day, you begin noticing the little things about him.
The way he stretches his shoulders whenever he thinks no one is looking, the way he sometimes falls asleep sitting upright at the counter after finishing his meal, and the way he often stares outside the window with a distant look before quickly smiling once more whenever someone greets him.
Before long, setting aside a portion for Varka becomes second nature.
āYou're late today,ā you would tell him.
And he would laugh. āSorry, sorry! Ms. Margaretās cat ended up on the roof again.ā
Or perhaps: āThe neighborhood kids challenged me to a soccer match. Can you believe they actually beat me?ā
Or: āOld Mr. Wagner insisted I help him fix his garden. Three hours later, I was still pulling weeds.ā
Slowly, his stories stop revolving around problems.
He starts telling you about the little things.
A funny joke one of the children told him.
The flowers are blooming in the park.
His favorite songs are playing on the radio.
Memories of his travels.
The festivals he attended in his youth.
Even embarrassing stories that make you laugh until your stomach hurts.
āDon't you dare tell anyone I lost an arm wrestling match to Klee.ā He said, though itās clear he was just being easy on the cheery kid.Ā
Without either of you noticing, the restaurant becomes part of his daily routine.
If he misses a day, the grandmothers ask where he is.
If he arrives late, you unconsciously glance at the door every few minutes.
And every evening, Varka takes his usual seat in front of the counter.
āEvening.ā
āWelcome back.ā
The regular customers eventually stop saying that Varka is visiting your restaurant.
Instead, they say teasingly: āAh, Varka's home.ā
One rainy evening, as you started cleaning up, you found him sleeping on the counter.
His meal had gone cold.
Concerned, you gently wake him.
āVarka?ā
He slowly opens his eyes.
āā¦Ah, sorry. Guess I was more tired than I thought.āĀ
Instead of getting up immediately like usual, he remains seated, quiet and looking strangely vulnerable.
Then, with a sheepish smile, he admits: āI think this might be my favorite place.ā
You stare at him in surprise, and he continues, āwhenever I walk through those doors⦠I feel like I can finally stop. I don't have to be the community leader who solves everyone's problems. I can just⦠eat, relax, and enjoy myself.ā
He chuckles.
āMaybe I've gotten spoiled.ā
He looks at you, his usual grin returning. āYou spoil me too much.ā
But despite his teasing tone, you can tell he means every word.
Eventually, even the neighborhood begins to notice.
Varka smiles more, and he actually takes days off, stops skipping meals, spends less time worrying about everyone else, and more time enjoying himself.
The grandmothers are delighted.
āHe's finally putting on some weight!ā
āHe looks younger!ā
āLook at those rosy cheeks!ā
Some even whisper to you with knowing smiles. āHeās happier when he visits you,ā as if he went to your grandfatherās restaurant for more than just the food.Ā
āHe deserves happiness too.ā
One day, while looking through your grandfatherās calendar, you discover something surprising.
Varka's birthday is approaching.
You excitedly ask him what his plans are when he comes to visit.Ā
He blinks, swallowing his food.
āPlans?ā
āAhā¦Nothing, I suppose. I'll probably just work.ā
You nearly drop the ladle in your hands.
āWork?!ā
Varka laughs.
āBirthdays aren't really a big deal. Besides, everyone's busy with their own lives. No need to make a fuss over a man like me.ā He says it so casually.
As though he genuinely expects nothing, as though he's grown used to spending that day alone.
Your heart aches at the thought.
So, together with your sickly grandfather and the regular customers, you secretly begin preparing.
The grandmothers bake desserts, the children draw cards, a few neighbors volunteer to handle the decorations, and even the neighborhood butcher donates his best meat.
Everyone was working together.
Because for years⦠Varka has celebrated everyone else's joys.
And now⦠It is finally their turn to celebrate his joy.
On the day itself, Varka was dumbfounded by the fact that not a single person in the neighborhood asked him any errands to help them with. The grandmothersā pipes were doing well, the children were busy with homework (on a weekend????), and even the neighbors who usually argue are suddenly getting along well.Ā
It was only until late at night you called for him for an emergency when he quickly ran.
When he slides open the door to your restaurant, he freezes.
āSURPRISE!ā
The entire restaurant erupts with cheers.
Balloons, streamers, mountains of food were all over the restaurant as elderly residents, children and families had all gathered together.Ā
All were the people he has helped throughout the years.
Some had traveled from other districts and even countries just to see him and celebrate his birthday.Ā
Everyone is smiling.
Everyone is laughing.
Everyone is here.
Varka stands motionless.
Completely stunned.
āW-What⦠What's all this?ā
Little Klee runs over and hugs his leg.
āHappy birthday, Mister Varka!ā
Ms. Margaret wipes tears from her eyes.
āIt's about time we spoiled you for once.ā
Old Mr. Wagner laughs. āNo running any errands today!ā
The children hand him handmade cards.
The grandmothers fusses over whether he's eating enough.
And your grandfather, whoās sitting on a wheelchair with his doctor behind him, grins.
āBrat. Thought we'd forgotten your birthday?ā
Varka's eyes slowly widen.
Before anyone can reactā¦
The great and mighty Varka quickly turned away from the crowd, hurriedly wiping his eyes.
He was tearing up.Ā
He then turned back to them and laughed, though there was a hint of shakiness in it.Ā Ā
āThank youā¦ā
āThank you, everyone.ā
And for the first time in yearsā¦
Varka celebrates his birthday not as the community leader that the whole neighborhood relies on, but simply as Varka.
Surrounded by people who love him.
Long after the party ends and everyone returns home, Varka stays behind.
Together, the two of you clean the restaurant.
The room is quiet.
Warm.
Peaceful.
Looking at the leftover decorations, he chuckles.
āYou really got me good. I was planning to just celebrate on my own and drink to my heartās content.ā
You smile.
āNobody forgot, just so you know.ā You spoke with a warm smile. āEveryone really wanted to celebrate with you.ā
Varka gazes around the diner. He looked at the counter, the stools, the kitchen, the little wish board hanging on the wallā
And finallyā¦
At you.
His eyes soften. So incredibly soft.
āYou knowā¦ā
āI've spent so much of my life making sure others have somewhere to be. But somewhere along the wayā¦ā
He smiles, warmth radiating out of him.
āI found my own place too.ā
Before leaving that night, Varka walks over to the restaurantās wish board, something your grandmother had put back when your grandfather first opened the restaurantāa tradition for every customer to at least write one wish.Ā Ā
Picking up a pen, he thinks for a moment.
Then, with a gentle smile, he writes:
"I wish to spend the rest of my days surrounded by those I love."
On the upper corner of the paper, he draws a small smiling sun.
And from that day onward, whenever he walks through the doors of the old diner, he always says the same thing.
āI'm back.ā
To which you always answer:
āWelcome back, Varka!ā
If there's one thing particular about Jean that you notice, it was the fact that she always comes to the restaurant in her uniform.Ā
She comes exactly at 20:00 after work, looking exhausted as ever as she settles down in the corner of the restaurant by the window and opens her laptop to work some more.
Given your experience from the city, you knew what it was like to be in her shoes.
So when you came to get her order, you weren't surprised to be greeted by her dozing state.
And it has become a familiar sight since then.
Her order was always the same thing: pizza paired with coffee; something easy to eat while working.
The sounds of her typing on her keyboard can be heard every time she comes, to the point where it starts to become weird if you don't hear it at night.
Sometimes, she stays until closing time.
And even then, she would only leave after answering one last email.
"Miss Jean, we're closing soon." You spoke with a polite smile.Ā
"Ah. My apologies." She spoke, flustered. "I'll just finish this report and be on my way."
There were times when she accidentally fell asleep with her glasses still on, or when she forgot to touch her food until it had already gone cold.
Whenever you reminded her, she would simply smile apologetically.
"Sorry. I got carried away⦠Again."
Despite how busy she always was, Jean never once failed to thank you for every meal.
"Thank you. It was delicious as always."
And she always smiled the most whenever she said those words.
One night, you heard the sounds of soft sneezes and sniffles.
When you checked on Jean, it was clear that she was sick.
To your dismay, when you told her to take a break from work and rest tomorrow, she simply shook her head in response.
"Thank you for your concern, but⦠I can't afford to call in sick. I have an important meeting tomorrow that I cannot miss.ā She said softly, trying to smile reassuringly towards you before sneezing once again.
When you came back once more with her order, she was surprised to see a warm bowl of cream stew on the side.
"It's on the house," you explained softly, "if you can't be absent tomorrow, at least try to take care of yourself."
Her eyes widened in surprise. Before she could protest and insist on paying, you quickly left her on her own to tend to other customers.
She didn't touch her laptop after that.
Instead, she quietly stared at the cream stew.
Her expression softened.
And for a brief momentā¦
You thought she looked like she was about to cry.
She didn't come to the restaurant the next day.
But on the day after, she returned, not as sick as before.
When you took her order, she decided to order an additional meal.
"I'd also like some cream stew on the side, if that's alright."
Over time, you've grown to care about the overworked businesswoman.
As you continue to observe her, you begin to realize that beneath all the work she's been doing every time she visits, there's always something behind her eyes that just made you know that this was something beyond work.
When you asked Varka about Jean, he could only sigh in response.
"Her parents passed away back when she had just turned twenty-one, leaving her to take care of her sister, Barbara, who was still young at the time." He said with a serious look.
"Jean eventually got hired to a company that offered a high pay, enough to help provide for Barbara's school. Though⦠not a lot of people liked that company, as it was known for often overworking its employees."
"I even tried to convince Jean to try out a different company, but she insisted the one she's in had the best benefits for Barbara and didn't want to risk losing it."
Your heart sank hearing her story. "...Where's Barbara now?"
"Oh, she's second year in college already."
Varka sighed. "But⦠it's like the two of them weren't as close as they used to be. Not when Jean is always on her laptop the whole time and never having the time to go to any of Barbara's school events."
You began to understand the businesswoman more after that.
One evening, while cleaning up empty plates, you suddenly asked out of curiosity:
"Miss Jean⦠Do you really enjoy that cream stew I made?"
Jean paused, her fingers froze above her keyboard.
For a moment, the sounds of typing stopped.Ā
And after a long silenceā¦
She smiled. A sad kind.
"Sorry if itās weird.. I-Itās just⦠it reminded me a lot of my little sister, Barbara, back when she was little."
She began to reminisce a little, a longing but pained look on her face. āOur mom would make cream stew for me whenever Iām sick, and sheād proudly stay by her momās side and bring me bowls without fail, wanting to see me feel better."
Jean let out a small laugh.
āI always finish them even when Iām already full, because she looked so happy."
Her smile gradually weakened.
"I don't think I've had cream stew since then⦠Not since our parents died."
āShe probably doesn't even remember anymore."
You began to regret asking her that question, unaware of how much such dish meant to her.Ā
As if reading your mind, she smiled sadly. āThank you for asking though. I.. I guess I needed to get that out of my chest.ā She said reassuringly.Ā
Eventually, Jean began coming to the restaurant without opening her laptop immediately.
Sometimes she actually ate while her food was still warm.
Sometimes she stayed simply to talk.
And one evening, she quietly asked:
"Do you think⦠It's too late?"
When you stopped cleaning the stove for a moment to look at her, she quickly clarified her question.
"...Do you think itās⦠too late for me to fix things? With her?"
You shook your head, already knowing what she meant.
"No."
"Itās never too late to fix things. Not if both people still care." You said softly. āBelieve me. I learned that the hard way.āĀ
A few weeks later, Jean didn't show up.
Nor the day after.
Nor the day after that.
You found yourself glancing at the door every evening, wondering if she was drowning in work.
Until nearly a week later.
The familiar bell rang.
"Welcomeā"
You froze.
Jean stood there.
Looking happier than you had ever seen her.
Beside her stood a younger woman with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.
"Good afternoon!" The younger woman greeted cheerfully, waving at you.
"You must be the one my sister always talks about!"
Jean actually looked embarrassed.
"Barbara⦠Must you say that?"
"But it's true!" Barbara giggled softly.
That night, the two sisters stayed until closing.
No laptops, no reports, no emails.
Just laughter and two cream stews.
Turns out, Jean had quit her job and went to a company that treats their employees better and had a much better benefit for her and her sister, giving her more time to finally make up the lost time with her sister.Ā
From then on, Jean no longer came every day.
Whenever she does visit, she always has stories to tell. Whether it was about movie nights with Barbara, about finally attending one of her performances, about embarrassing herself trying to bake, about weekend shopping trips, about the little moments she had thought she had lost forever.
And every time she spoke of her sister⦠Her eyes shone.
One evening, after finishing her meal, Jean lingered by the counter instead of immediately leaving.
She looked oddly nervous.
"May I ask you something?"
"Of course."
Jean hesitated for a moment.
"...Would you be willing to teach me how to cook cream stew? Barbara and I have been trying, but we can never quite recreate the taste."
She smiled sheepishly.
"And I thought⦠Perhaps I could learn from the expert."
You were quick to say yes.Ā
So on the weekend, when the restaurant was quieter than usual, Jean came by wearing an apron instead of her work uniform.
It was such an unusual sight that you almost didn't recognize her.
"Is something wrong?" She asked.
"N-No⦠It's just strange seeing you without your laptop." You said with a sheepish smile.Ā
Jean laughed softly.
"I left it at home. Barbara made sure of that."
And so the two of you spent the afternoon together in the kitchen.
You taught her how to prepare the vegetables, how long to simmer the broth, and the importance of patience.
Though admittedly⦠Jean wasn't exactly gifted in the culinary arts.
"Miss Jean, thatās milk, not cream."
"Ah⦠Right. My apologies."
Despite her mistakes, Jean looked genuinely happy. Happier than you had ever seen her during those long nights spent working.
Every now and then, she'd excitedly ask questions or proudly present her progress to you.
And before you knew it⦠The afternoon had slipped away.
"How does it taste?" Jean asked nervously.
You took a spoonful.
And smiled.
"Not bad."
Jean blinked.
"Not bad? That's all?"
You laughed.
"For your first attempt, it's excellent."
Jean smiled.
A bright, genuine smile.
One that made her look years younger.
"Thank goodness."
"Barbara will be happy.
And so time flew by as you watched the businesswoman become happier and healthier.Ā
One day during her visit, Jean smiled softly towards you.
"Barbara really liked the cream stew I made yesterday. Iām getting better thanks to you."
She then sheepishly added, āIt's still not as good as yours, though."
She paused for a moment, as though she had something important she wanted to say.
"I've been meaning to thank you."
She said quietly.
"Not just for the meals. Or for taking care of me when I was sick."
Jean lowered her gaze slightly.
"I thought I had already failed as a sister. That perhaps⦠Barbara and I had simply grown too far apart."
A small smile appeared on her face.
"But because of you⦠I remembered the things that mattered, and Ww found our way back to each other."
She let out a soft laugh.
"Barbara says I've become less quiet lately. Though I'm not entirely sure that's a compliment."
Despite her words, she looked happier than ever.
"Still⦠Thank you. Truly. I hope your grandfather gets better soon as well."
One evening, before leaving, Jean stopped in front of the wishing board.
Looking thoughtful, she picked up a pen.
Then, with a gentle smile, she wrote:
"I want to be a better sister."
When she finished, she looked at the board for a while.
Before quietly adding:
"And perhapsā¦"
"A better version of myself as well."
Though she never wrote those words down.
Because deep down, you had already helped her do that.
Unlike Jean and Varka, Hat Guy had quite an entrance.
It happened on one rainy day when the door suddenly slid open harshly, the bell ringing rather in a wrong and hurried way.
When you check on the newcomer, you certainly didn't expect to see a foreign young-looking man with a large hat that's dripping rainwater on the floor, holding a permanent scowl on his face as he quietly curses at the unfortunate weather.
You watched carefully as he sat down on the very end of the counter seat with a huff, removing his wet hat, unsure if he was the type to shout at poor employees.
Before you could greet him and ask for his order, he beat you to it, scanning over the menu pasted on the counter.
"I'll get the most bitter tea you have with a cold cut platter meal."
As you quickly get started on preparing his meal, you try to ignore his quiet curses to himself.
"Great⦠First my men lost that cursed doctor, then it started raining, and now I'm stuck in this stupid town."
So much for first impressions, am I right?
Based on his constant complaints that he "kept to himself," you managed to put two and two together that Hat Guy happened to pass by the neighborhood while trying to find a doctor for reasons only your ancestors can tell, but due to the heavy rain, he had to take a detour and come to your restaurant.
Despite his harsh demeanor, he wasn't exactly harsh to you in a way one would expect an entitled customer to be.
If you could guess, you'd assume he's actually just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
When you served his order, he was already quiet, taking light bites as he continued to put on a nasty look on his face.
He didn't leave any more comments when he was finished either, standing up from his stool and grabbing his now dry hat as he left the bill on the counter, ready to go back to whatever he was doing since the rain finally stopped.
You thought that would've been the last time you'd see the foreigner.
But then he came back the day after tomorrow.
This time, he didn't look as angry and mean as before as he went to his previous spot, scanning the menu once more without another word.
"I'll get the most bitter tea you have and the flaming red bolognese."
It slowly became a routine.
Every twice a week, he comes back to your restaurant ordering different meals with the same bitter drink.
Each time, you felt like you're walking on eggshells due to remembering his nasty attitude during your first encounter, not wanting to deal with any hassling conflicts with any customers as it's the last thing you needed.
Yet despite all his complaints, he somehow never had anything bad to say about your cooking.
Not that he'd ever compliment it.
"The tea's acceptable."
"This one's edible."
"You didn't burn the noodles today."
Which, according to your grandfather, was probably the closest thing to praise coming from someone like him.
Eventually, you stopped being nervous around him.
And perhaps he noticed.
Because he stopped glaring at you whenever you approached his seat.
Sometimes, he'd even push his empty plate forward before you could ask.
"Same drink."
"And surprise me with the meal."
"I don't care."
Which was strange.
Because for someone who kept to himself so much⦠He had somehow entrusted his meals entirely to you.
Though he would deny such a thing if anyone pointed it out.
"Don't misunderstand. I'm just too lazy to read the menu."
And yet, every dish you recommended was always finished completely.
One evening, when you apologized for making him wait longer than usual due to the amount of customers, Hat Guy merely scoffed.
"What are you apologizing for? I'm not in a hurry."
He paused.
"...Besides, I was planning on staying a while."
Somehow, hearing those words made your heart skip a beat.
Not that you'd ever admit that.
What really made you surprised was the time when one of the children accidentally bumped into Hat Guy while playing around, and just when you thought the poor kid was about to get one hell of a lecture and berating comment, you were instead surprised to see Hat Guy checking up on the kid and shooing him away, before going back to his meal as if nothing happened.
Huh, maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
Out of habit, you continue to observe your foreign customer while handling your restaurant around.
Though he often claims that he simply happened to be passing through, it somehow becomes a routine for him to visit every twice a week.
He never orders the same meal twice. But his drink always remains the same.
Sometimes he brings a newspaper.
Sometimes he sits in complete silence.
And sometimes, when there aren't many customers around, he quietly listens to the conversations of the elderly residents while pretending not to.
Oddly enough, he no longer scans the menu and actually knows all your meals by heart.
Even stranger, he always visits during the busiest hours despite how much he complains about noisy places.
He never joins any conversations, but he never leaves early either.
In fact, you've noticed that after finishing his meals, he often stays behind with his tea.
Watching the rain outside.
Listening to the grandmothers gossip.
Listening to the children giggling and playing around.
Listening to you talk with the regular customers.
And every now and then, you catch him looking at you.
Only for him to immediately avert his eyes with a click of his tongue.
"...Watch where you're walking."
"You'll trip."
Orā
"The soup's boiling over."
Orā
"You missed a spot."
He always notices.
Somehow, he notices everything.
Huh.
Maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
One particularly quiet evening, you accidentally cut your finger while preparing ingredients.
Before you could even react, Hat Guy was already standing up, leaning towards the counter to check up on you.Ā
"Idiot."
His voice was sharper than usual. "How are you this careless?"
You blinked in surprise.
"...Hat Guy?"
He looked equally surprised himself, as if he hadn't realized he had gotten up.
"...Tch."
"You were getting blood everywhere, you might mess up my order."
Despite his complaints, he stayed beside you until the bandage was wrapped properly.
Only then did he return to his seat, ears slightly red as he hides his face with his hat.
"...Don't misunderstand. It would've been annoying if you got sick."
You couldn't stop smiling to yourself for the rest of the evening.
Before long, the regulars become used to his presence.
Though nobody knew his name, the children eventually started calling him "Hat Guy."
Much to his annoyance.
"I'm not answering to that."
"Good evening, Mister Hat Guy!"
"...Brats."
And yet for some reason, he always carries little candies in his pockets, and the neighborhood cats seem to adore him for some reason.
"Don't get the wrong idea. I just happened to have leftovers." He said, crossing his arms when he realized you were watching him after you took out the trash.Ā
Huh.
Maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
One afternoon, while helping one of the regular customers cross the road from the restaurant, you noticed Miss Nahida sitting outside her home.
The oldest resident of the neighborhood who used to be a very beloved teacher in the school thatās located in the neighborhood.
Though age had weakened her body and memory, she remained beloved by everyone. Even your grandfather, who always has something to say about people, had nothing but respect for the elderly woman.
Some days she remembered your name.
Other days she mistook you for one of her old students.
Without fail, she always remembered to smile.
"Good afternoon, dear."
"Have you seen my grandson?"
You blinked.
"Your grandson?"
"Kuni."
She smiled warmly.
"Such a sweet boy. He's been away for work. But he promised to visit me soon."
"He promised."
Varka, who happened to be nearby, simply sighed.
And when Nahida wasn't listening anymore, he quietly explained.
"That promise was made years ago. He left after high school and never looked back."
Your heart sank.
According to Varka, Nahida had found an abandoned baby left outside her doorstep decades ago.
Nobody knew who the parents were, and nobody ever came looking for him.Ā
So she simply brought the child inside and raised him herself.
"His name's Kunikuzushi."
Varka smiled softly.
"Though she always called him Kuni. Based on what the grannies told me, he had always looked up to her more than anything. But then he grew up. Said he wanted something bigger than this little neighborhood.Ā
Varka then sighed. āAnd one day, he left. Nobody knows what he does, and nobody's heard from him since. Not even Miss Nahida. I remember granny telling me about how devastating it was to see their favorite teacher looking so hopeful yet sad when each year flew by without him visiting."
For some reason, your thoughts immediately drifted towards Hat Guy. Though you quickly dismissed the idea.
Surely not.
Right?
Yet the coincidence kept bothering you, especially when you often see him either lingering or staring in the direction of Miss Nahidaās home.Ā
And one evening, after watching Hat Guy stare absentmindedly out the window towards Miss Nahida's house, you finally asked.
"Do you know Miss Nahida?"
The spoon in his hand stopped.
For a moment, he said nothing.
Thenā
"...Who?"
It was far too quick, far too rehearsed. He didnāt even look you in the eyes.
And thatās when you had your answer.
After that, you started noticing strange things.
Every morning, someone leaves fresh flowers by Nahida's doorstep, someone fixes the broken fence before Varka could, and someone leaves groceries outside whenever she forgets to buy them.
And not one single person knows who did it.
Except one rainy morning, when you accidentally caught Hat Guy holding grocery bags outside her house.
Upon seeing you, he clicked his tongue.
"Don't misunderstand. I just happened to be passing by."
You raised an eyebrow, unsure what to think. "Passing by with groceries?"
"...Shut up."
Despite all that, he never bothered to knock nor call her outside.Ā
And as the months passed, his questions slowly became stranger.
"...Tell me." He hesitated for a moment, holding his tea and blowing the steam off.Ā
"If someone wasted years of their life doing stupid things⦠Would it even matter if they came back?"
Another time, he quietly asked: "What if they've done things they can never take back?"
And another time: "What if they're afraid?"Ā
And every time, you always answer each question reassuringly, knowing that he wasnāt talking about someone else.
Then one day, you found yourself asking Hat Guy a question when he came to visit.
"Why won't you talk to her?"
His expression darkened.
Instead of denying yet again about not knowing who youāre talking about, he dropped the act. "...What's the point? She forgets everything."
"Maybe.ā You replied softly. āBut she remembers waiting for you."
For the first time since you've met himā¦
He said nothing.
He simply stared into his tea, then quietly paid the bill and left.
And for nearly two weeksā¦
He never returned.
You honestly thought that would be the last time you would see him.
Until one evening, the bell rang.
And there he was.
Though something about him seemed different. Quieter. Softer. As though a burden had been lifted from his shoulders.
After finishing his meal, he suddenly spoke.
"...She remembered."
When you look up at him in surprise, he continues speaking. "Not everything though, but she remembered me."
He laughed weakly.
"...Stupid old woman. She asked why I took so long. Then she forgot and asked who I was.āĀ
Despite the insults, you noticed how suspiciously red his eyes were.
"Did you answer her?"
"...Yeah. I did."
After that night, Hat Guy began visiting more frequently. He looked relaxed a little more. Though his questions never seemed to stop.
"...If someone wanted to leave everything behind to start over⦠Would running away make them a coward?"
You thought about it for a moment.
Then smiled.
"Not if they're running towards a better future."
He stared at you.Ā
"...I see."
Sure enough, after finishing his meal, he stood up. Putting the money on the counter, he adjusted his hat.
Then, with a strange look in his eyes, he quietly said:
"Thanks.. for everything.ā
And then he left.
You never saw him again after that.Ā
Strangely enough, Miss Nahida smiles more these days.
"Kuni visited me the other day. He was such a good boy, he asked if I wanted to go with him to a far away place for a fresh start.ā She said to you one day.Ā
Your eyes widen in surprise. āAnd did you say yes, Miss Nahida?ā You asked.Ā
She shook her head, laughing softly. āNo, of course not. Iām too old to travel, and I think itāll do him good to go out there without worrying about me. But he did promise he'll come back again when the time comes."
And though sometimes she forgets his name, the conversation, and even his identity,Ā
She never forgets that he came home.
And one evening, while cleaning the restaurant after closing time, you noticed a new wish hanging on the board.
You don't recall seeing any customers putting it there.
Yet the elegant handwriting gave you an inkling feeling that you already know who it came from. .Ā
Written in small, neat letters were the words:
"Thank you for everything."
No name.
No explanation.
But you understood, a sad smile forming on your face.
Wherever Hat Guy had goneā
You could only hope that, this timeā¦
He was finally running towards happiness.
The first person you met when you first arrived at the neighborhood is none other than your grandfather's physician.
You had only just finished listening to your grandfather's instructions on how to manage his restaurant when the bell above the restaurant door chimed.
Turning around, you expected a customer.
Instead, a tall man dressed in a doctor's uniform stepped inside with a smile on his face.
"Good morning." He greeted, his voice gentle, calm and pleasant to listen to. "I'm here for your check-up."
Before you could even react, your grandfather groaned from the kitchen.
"Youāre here already?"
The doctor chuckled. "Goodness, what a cruel thing to say to your physician."
"Bah. You're only here to nag me."
Nonetheless, the doctor smiled more. "Because you refuse to listen."
As you listen to their conversation, the two of them sounded less like doctor and patient, and more like old friends.
That was your first impression of Doctor Baizhu.
To the neighborhood, Baizhu is a wonderful doctor who has the most effective medicine there is, with the price of having to suffer from the extreme bitterness of said medicine. To your grandfather, he's a nuisance who constantly reminded him to rest and not work his bum off to run the restaurant.To the children, he was the terrifying man responsible for making them drink awful syrup. Though they still adored him, finding him ācoolā for having a snake in his home. To the elderly residents, he was the kind young doctor who patiently listened to their complaints even when they repeated the same stories over and over again. To the shopkeepers, he was someone who always remembered to ask how their families were doing.
To everyone elseā¦
Doctor Baizhu was simply Doctor Baizhu.
Someone reliable, kind, and always seemed to have a smile on his face.
Knowing how stubborn your grandfather is during his morning check-ups, you couldn't help but feel bad for the doctor and offer Baizhu to eat at the restaurant every time he checks up on your grandfather, to which the doctor always appreciated and kindly accepted your offer.
"Are you certain?" He asks.Ā
You nodded reassuringly. "Of course! Itās the least I can do as thanks for putting up with the old man."
At that, he laughed softly. "Then I shall gratefully accept."
He then became some of the customers that come in the morning given that's the time he visits your grandfather, so he got to experience the peaceful atmosphere of the restaurant that only occurs at this hour.
The sunlight filtering through the windows, the quiet chatter of regular customers, the smell of freshly baked bread, and the sound of dishes clinking together was peaceful and comfortable, enough to make any tension come off.
And in your opinion, Doctor Baizhu fit perfectly into that atmosphere.
His order is usually a crab, ham, and veggie bake with tea on the side, and he prefers sitting by the wall near your kitchen where he has alone time and can call you when he needs something.
He always thanked you whenever you brought his food without fail.
"Thank you. This smells wonderful."
Even if it was something simple as merely refilling his tea, you couldnāt help but feel something warm in your stomach from his gratitude.Ā
Doctor Baizhu always made people feel appreciated.
Most of the customers who came by would notice him and greet him, to which he greeted back with a polite smile on his face, often asking them about their well-being and whether they had taken care of themselves better despite the fact that some of them were no longer under his care.
"Good morning, Mrs. Faruzan. Remember to take your medicine after breakfast."
"Mr. Cyrus, please don't strain your back again."
"Ah, Varka. Have you been drinking too much lately?"
Which earned a loud protest from the neighborhood leader. "Doctor! Don't expose me in public!"
Baizhu laughed. "My apologies. Professional habit."Ā
It was clear to you that everybody loved Doctor Baizhu.
Though admittedly⦠They couldnāt say the same to his medicine.Ā
"Bah! Why does this blasted thing taste worse every day?" Your grandfather grimaced after swallowing his daily medicine.
"Because you complain about it every day." Baizhu replied with a patient smile.
"It's bitter!"
"It's medicine."
"Can't you make it taste like tea or something?"
"I could, but then you'd complain that it doesn't work."
"Hmph. Still tastes awful."
"And yet you drank it without fuss today."
"Don't get smug, doctor."
You'd often hear him laugh softly whenever that happened.
A gentle laugh.
One that made the peaceful mornings feel even warmer.
You've come to like Baizhu. A lot.
Which is why it didn't take long for you to notice something about the doctor.
Every time he eats his meal, his hand often trembles, as if struggling to lift the spoon up to his lips.
But he never lets it be known to the whole world, not when he often stops using his utensils right away whenever someone comes to greet him.
He's always seen smiling, always composed, always elegant. And yet⦠His smile made it easy to overlook the exhaustion beneath his eyes.
When you decide to ask your grandfather about Baizhu after he left, your grandfather sighs.
"Ah, Dr. Baizhu's physical condition is far from perfect. Truth be told, I don't know how he even manages to keep up with his work. That fool should be the one lying on the bed instead of me."
You blinked.
"Doctor Baizhu is sick?"
"Always has been." Your grandfather huffed. "He's got that pharmacy of his to manage, patients to look after, and his assistant Gui running around like a headless chicken."
He sighed. "Even so, he still insists on making house calls. He never says no and never complains, especially when it comes to the children and people at my age⦠even when he's coughing his lungs out."
He then crossed his arm, displeased. "Bah. Doctors make terrible patients."
Your heart sank.
Ever since then, you begin paying more attention to him.
You notice how he often excuses himself to cough in private, how he occasionally loses his appetite, how his tea always turns cold because he spends more time checking on others than himself, how he quietly massages his wrists whenever they ache, andā¦
How he simply closes his eyes for a few moments before putting on his smile again.
Whenever you ask him how he's feeling, he simply smiles.
"I'm alright. Please don't worry too much about me."
Though the shadows beneath his eyes only seem to deepen.
One morning, while you were cleaning the tables, Baizhu suddenly collapsed.
Thankfully, it wasn't severe, but seeing the neighborhood's beloved doctor unconscious for the first time deeply worried everyone.
Especially you.
By the time he woke up, he was already embarrassed.
"My, this is rather humiliating."
You checked up on his condition, worried for your friend. "Doctor Baizhu. You scared everyone."
He simply laughed softly.
"My apologies. I suppose my body wanted a break."
Yet despite his lightheartedness, you couldn't bring yourself to feel assured that heās alright.
And for the first time since you've known him, Baizhu noticed the tears in your eyes.
His smile faltered. "...Oh dear. Please don't cry. I assure you, I'm quite difficult to get rid of."
That only made your chest hurt even more.
After that day, you became more stubborn.
You prepared lighter meals for him, made sure his tea stayed warm, scolded him whenever he skipped meals.
And before long, the regular customers joined in too.
Varka often helped Baizhu carry his medicine supplies, some of the children reminded him to rest, and your grandfather grumbled at him every chance he got.
Somehow, the entire neighborhood had begun taking care of its doctor.
Much to Baizhu's amusement.
"Goodness. I've become everyone's patient."
One peaceful morning, after the other customers had left, Baizhu quietly asked: "May I ask you something?"
You were quick to lend an ear. "Of course."
He looked towards the window, his eyes softening.Ā
"...Do you think it's selfish to wish for more time?"
Your hands stopped.
"More time?"
Baizhu smiled weakly.
"Mm. More time to work and to help others."
Then, after a brief pauseā
"...And to stay beside those precious to me."
Somehowā¦
Your face grew warm.
And Baizhu chuckled softly upon noticing. "My apologies. Perhaps that was too embarrassing."
"Not at all." You replied quietly. "I think it's only human of us to always wish for more time."
He looked genuinely surprised by your answer.Ā
From then on, Baizhu begins lingering after meals.Ā
Sometimes he stays in the restaurant more to keep you company in the lonely mornings. Sometimes he reads a book beside the counter. Or sometimes, if he feels bold, he simply watches you cook.
And every now and then, you'd catch him smiling to himself. His smile this time was fond and sincere.Ā
One that made your heart skip a beat.
While Baizhu was on his way to the restaurant in the morning, some of the children in the neighborhood were quick to follow him, still in their school uniforms as theyāre on their way to their school.
Ā "Doctor Baizhu?" One kid spoke up.Ā
"Hm?"
"What are you thinking about thatās making you smile so wide?"
He blinked, then laughed quietly.
"Ah. Was I?"
He thoughtfully tried to come up with an answer. But deep down, he already knew the reason behind it.
āI suppose itās a good day today.āĀ
One morning, as you walked with Baizhu to see him off and return to the pharmacy near the exit, Baizhu stopped in front of the wishing board.
He stood there for a long time. Longer than anyone else.
āMy, how cute.ā He commented.Ā
Then, with a gentle smile, he wrote: "I wish everyone a long and healthy life."
You smiled.
"That's a very Doctor Baizhu answer."
He laughed softly. "Old habits die hard, I'm afraid."
Then, after a moment, his gaze drifted towards you.
Warm.
Tender.
Almost wistful.
"Though⦠If I may be selfish just this onceā¦"
He smiled.
"I hope I get to enjoy many more meals with you."
And despite the weakness that remained in his body, the uncertainty of tomorrow., and knowing that life could never promise him forever.
Doctor Baizhu still smiled ever so brightly.
Because for the first time in a long while, he had found something precious enough to look forward to tomorrow.
And for now.... That was enough.Ā
You remembered Zhongli from back when you still lived in the neighborhood.
Back when your world was much smaller, when your biggest worries consisted of unfinished homework and whether your grandfather would catch the two of you sneaking snacks from the kitchen.
He was the son of an elderly woman whom your grandparents were very close with.
And because the adults spent so much time together, their children naturally did as well.
You met him when you were young, far younger than either of you could remember.
Neither of you could really recall when exactly your friendship began, but you knew it simply existed. As naturally as breathing and as naturally as the sun rising every morning.
Since then, the two of you had been inseparable.If people saw you, Zhongli was usually nearby. And if they saw Zhongli, you certainly weren't far behind.
You grew up together, went to the same schools, shared lunches, studied together, walked home together, celebrated birthdays together, cried together, laughed together.
And before either of you realized itā¦
Childhood became adolescence.
And adolescence became high school.
Everyone around you simply assumed that one day, the two of you would get married.
Even your grandfather loved teasing the both of you.
"Oi, Zhongli."
"When are you taking my grandchild away, hm?"
Which only resulted in Zhongli smiling politely while you nearly died of embarrassment.
"Grandpa! Please don't tease him." You complained to your grandfather.Ā
Yet Zhongli always answered so calmly, so composed, and so so so dignified. āItās alright.āĀ
Yet despite his collected demeanor, the tips of his ears would always turn red.
Which only made your grandfather laugh harder.
"Look at him!"
"Grandpa!"
You wanted the ground to swallow you whole.
Meanwhile, Zhongli merely coughed into his hand, looking everywhere except at you.
And despite your embarrassment, you secretly thought he looked adorable.
Itās safe to say that Zhongli was your first friend, your first crush, and your first love.
The person who knew you better than anyone else.
And perhapsā¦
Your greatest regret.
Which was why it hurt so much when your parents announced that you would be moving to the city.
You still remembered that evening.
The two of you sat inside the restaurant after closing hours, the lights were dim, the streets outside were quiet, and for the first time in your lifeā¦
You didn't know what to say to him.
Because how were you supposed to tell the person who had always been by your side that you were leaving?
You remembered crying, struggling to get the words out, and how Zhongli was quietly listening.
As he always did.
And what hurt the most was that he never once made things difficult for you. He never once complained, nor even asked you to stay.
Even though you knew that deep down, he didn't want you to go.
"...It's alright." He smiled softly. "We'll still call each other."
"And besides⦠You'll visit when you grow older right?āĀ
You smiled through your tears.
"Of course. I'll come back all the time. Nothing's going to change."
Such naive promises, such foolish confidence.
Because life had a cruel habit of getting in the way.
One year became three.
Three became five.
Calls became texts.
Texts became occasional greetings.
Occasional greetings became birthdays.
Birthdays became silence.
Yet neither of you forgot.
You couldn't.
Because Zhongli has always been your person.
And you had always been his.
Which was why, when the bell above the restaurant door rang during the final hour of the evening⦠You never expected to see him.
Of all people.
Zhongli.
Standing there.
Looking exactly as you remembered.
Handsome.
Elegant.
Timeless.
His expression softened upon seeing you, and he smiled. The same smile that had accompanied nearly every memory of your youth.
"...I hope I'm not too late."
Your breath caught.
For a moment, you thought you were dreaming. Yet there he was walking toward the counter, pulling out a stool, and sitting down with all the familiarity in the world.
As though no time had passed at all.
You swallowed the lump in your throat and smiled.
"No⦠Not at all. The usual?"
And unlike everyone else, Zhongli only ever ordered tea.
Just tea.
Nothing more.
And every evening after thatā¦
He would arrive during the last hour, without fail.
The first thing he always asked was: "How was your day?"
And you found yourself telling him everything, about the customers, the regulars, your worries, your frustrations, and the little things that made you smile.
And Zhongli listened. He always listened, looking genuinely happy just hearing your voice.
Just like before.
Which only made your chest ache.
Because regret still lingered. You regret for the years lost, for the distance, and for all the things left unsaid.
Of course, Zhongli noticed.Ā
He always noticed.
He placed his tea down and hummed softly. "That was a long time ago." He spoke softly, looking at you.Ā
"Please do not beat yourself up over it." His voice remained warm, gentle, and familiar.
"Would it make you feel better if you take a break and enjoy this tea with me?"
And no matter how exhausting your day had been, no matter how tired you feltā¦
You always found yourself sitting beside him.
Just like old times.
Sometimes the two of you reminisced about high school, you complained about city life, you laughed until your stomach hurt.
And sometimes⦠Zhongli simply listened.
Just as he always had.
Every time you apologized for losing touch, Zhongli only smiled.
"You always apologize, yet I never once blamed you."
And those words⦠those kind gentle wordsā¦Ā
Only made your heart ache even more.
His visits continued as you managed the restaurant, to the point where it became a precious routine that you found yourself looking forward to every day.
Because seeing him again made you happier than you'd been in years.
Before long, the final hour became your favorite part of the day.
Because it meant seeing Zhongli and reliving your childhood all over again.
One evening, while laughing over an embarrassing memory from high school, Zhongli suddenly asked:
"...Do you regret anything?"
You paused.
"...A lot."
"Such as?"
You looked away from him for a moment, your smile disappearing. "...Leaving⦠and not being here."Ā Ā
Zhongli quietly listened.
As he always did.
Then he smiled gently. "Life simply happened. There's no shame in that."
Yet, his smile seemed sadder than usual.Ā
Truth be told, it pained him to see you constantly beat yourself up for what happened. He wanted you to truly be happy.Ā
Then one evening⦠He didn't come, nor the day after, nor the week after that.
You found yourself staring at the clock, constantly waiting for the bell.
But it never rang.
After a month had passed, your grandfather had finally recovered enough to leave his room and help around the restaurant again, feeling better than ever thanks to Baizhuās miracle work and his perseverance.
Excited, you found yourself glancing at the clock, waiting once again for Zhongli to come.
You wanted to tell Zhongli the good news.
You wanted to tell him that Grandpa had recovered.
You wanted to tell him how happy you were.
You wantedā¦
To see him.
As the final hour approached, your grandfather noticed your constant glances toward the door as he was wiping the counter.
"...Waiting for someone?" He asked gruffly.Ā
You smiled softly. "...Not really.āĀ
You hesitated for a moment, sighing softly as you looked down.Ā
ā...I just suddenly missed Zhongli."
Your grandfather paused, then smiled sadly.
"...Me too, kid."
Silence settled between the two of you.
A quiet, familiar silence.
The kind Zhongli himself would've appreciated.
Looking at the empty stool opposite yours, your chest started to hurt.
Because you already knew.
Heās never coming back at all.Ā
ā...His death anniversary is coming next week.ā You spoke sadly, voice suddenly hoarse.Ā
You had known ever since you returned to your hometown, ever since you stood before his mother in his home, and ever since you learned that the boy you'd loved all your life had quietly left this world while you were away.
And still, you find yourself waiting.
Listening for the bell, hoping, wishing that he comes at the last hour to talk to you.
But the bell never rang.
That night, after closing the restaurant, you quietly excused yourself.
And for the first time since returning homeā¦
You visited him.
The moon hung high above as you stood before the gravestone that held his name, his dates, and the proof that this wasn't some terrible nightmare.
It was real.
He was gone.
Everything you had been holding back came crashing down.
The missed calls, the messages you promised to answer later before drowning from work, the news from old neighbors you were too busy to read, the funeral you arrived too late for, and the flowers.
You remembered seeing his mother crying when you entered his home, only to learn from the elderly woman that he had been battling cancer for years and that he had hidden it from everyone.
It pained you that just when you were able to finally visit him after so long, it was already over.
You collapsed before his grave, letting out shaky breaths as you sobbed.
"I'm sorryā¦"
"I'm sorry I wasn't there."
"I'm sorry I came too late."
"I'm sorryā¦"
"I'm sorryā¦"
The words became sobs.
You didnāt know how long youāve been kneeling in front of his grave, the grass prickling your legs as you continued to cry in grief and regret.Ā
You missed him so so so much.
You wanted to tell him so many things.
And before you knew it, exhaustion overtook you as you fell asleep, curled up in front of his gravestone.Ā Ā
And in your dreams, you finally saw him.
Zhongli.
He was sitting across from you with a cup of tea in his hands.
Smiling just as he always had. He was no longer the Zhongli consumed by illness, or the Zhongli that haunted your memories.
Right in front of you was Zhongli.
Your Zhongli.
You broke down immediately.
"I'm sorry,ā You gasped. āI'm sorry I wasn't there! You must've been scared, you must've been lonely, a-and Iā"
"It's alright." He interrupted softly.
You sobbed even more. "...But it isn't! I left, I lost touch, a-and when I finally came backā"
"Life happened." Zhongli smiled gently. "There's no shame in that."
Tears blurred your vision.
"But I missed so much." You shakily replied.Ā
He nodded. "Mm. But we had many wonderful years together, didn't we?"
You cried even more as he continued to talk, ā...And those memories made me very happy."
He sounded so happy, it ate you alive.Ā
"Zhongli⦠Werenāt you angry at me?" You asked brokenly.Ā
He blinked.
Then chuckled softly. āAngry? At you?" His eyes curved warmly. "Never."
"You always apologize, and I never once blamed you. You know this was something thatās out of our hands."
Those words only made you cry harder.
"I loved you."
The confession escaped your lips before you could stop it.
Zhongli froze.
His smile then returned. "...I know."
"...And I loved you too."
Your breath caught.
There was no regret in his eyes, only warmth and peace.
As he finished his tea, he placed the empty cup down.Ā
"...Thank you. For remembering me, for coming home, and for allowing me to say goodbye."
Tears wouldn't stop falling, yet you smiled.
Zhongli had always known how to comfort you.
Just as he always had, and just as he always would.
"...Will I ever see you again?" You whispered.
Zhongli merely smiled.
And with the same tenderness he'd shown you since childhood, he answered: "Perhaps when the time comes. But not yet."
He then placed a hand on top of yours. "You still have much to see, so many people to meet and befriendā¦ā
ā...So please⦠live well for both of us.ā
The world around you slowly faded.
And by the time you opened your eyes⦠morning had come.
You were still beside his grave alone.
Yet the loneliness didn't hurt as much.
Because for the first time since his passingā¦
Your heart no longer carried regret alone, but instead gratitude.
ā...Thank you, Zhongli.ā You whispered, sitting up from the cold ground and caressed his gravestone. āIāll live for the both of us.ā
And so, you returned to the restaurant.Ā
One week later, his death anniversary arrived.Ā
Your grandfather decided to throw a special party at the restaurant just for him as everyone that you knew came and celebrated in his name.Ā Ā
As you watched the party going on, you decided to finally try out the wishing board and write your own wish.Ā
Tears filled your eyes once more as you pasted the paper on the board.Ā
Despite your tears, you smiled, knowing that Zhongli can finally move on alongside you.
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this second life, you were born in the fantastical nation of both lush rainforest and barren desert of Sumeru as a dedicated scholar of the Akademiya. As you decided to take on a new goal that could risk your entire education, your dearest friend has his concerns.
PAIRING. alhaitham x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, unspoken love, major character death, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 2692 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
In your second life, you were born beneath Sumeruās canopy of knowledge, where wisdom was praised and curiosity a virtue sharpened to a blade. You entered the Akademiya under the Amurta Darshan with ink-stained hands and a mind that refused to rest. While others sought recognition, accolades, or swift ascension through academic ranks, you pursued something far less tangible.
A journal.
Not yoursāat least, not originally.
It was an adventurerās journal you found tucked away in the depths of the House of Daenaās archives, its pages yellowed and worn, its handwriting elegant yet intimate.Ā
The author wrote about creatures not as specimens, but as companions. They described Crystalflies as though they were fleeting miracles, foxes as clever little souls, Oceanids as tragic beings, and even the most dangerous creatures were written with understanding rather than fear.
You found yourself enchanted.
And as the days turned to weeks, the unknown adventurer became your favorite author. Sometimes, you laughed at their little notes scribbled in the margins. Sometimes, you teared up at the loneliness hidden between the lines.
And often, you wondered what kind of person could write with such tenderness.
The journal chronicled every nation.
Mondstadt.
Liyue.
Inazuma.
Sumeru.
Untilā
It stopped.
Midway through Snezhnaya. Not even a conclusion, no final entry, nor even a farewell.
The final page ended abruptly, as though the author had simply stood up one day and vanished. The last page was the publisherās note that explained what happened to the author, followed by an illustration of said author that you didnāt pay much attention to.Ā
It frustrated you endlessly.
āA shame,ā you murmured one afternoon, fingers brushing the unfinished page. āI wanted to know what happened to you.ā
There were no records regarding the adventurer beyond what they did in the Adventurers' Guild as well as the publisherās note. They had no descendants, no additional publications, nor even a documentation of their life.
And from that silence, a dream was born.
You wish to continue what they could notā
āYouāre staring again.ā
The sharp smack of a book against the crown of your head jolted you back to the present.
āOwā!ā You glared up, already knowing who it was. āAlhaitham.ā
The culprit regarded you with complete indifference. āYouāve been sitting in the same position for hours. That was your third missed meal today.ā
āI was just reading for research,ā you protested, rubbing a spot on your head where he smacked you.Ā
āYouāre neglecting your basic needs,ā he countered. āThat disqualifies it from being productive.ā
You scoffed. āYou sound like a pamphlet.ā
āAnd you sound like someone who needs to eat,ā he replied evenly, handing you the book youād been staring at. āCome on. Tavern.ā
That was Alhaithamāyour dearest friend, your constant, your unwanted but reliable tether to reality. Intelligent to an almost irritating degree, rational to the point of cruelty when he chose to be, and somehow always aware of where you were, what you were doing, and what you had forgotten to take care of.Ā
You met him early in your Akademiya years.Ā
He had sat across from you in the House of Daena and, without introduction or permission, spoke up after hearing your crazed mumblings over a class as you wrote down your notes.
āYour argument is flawed.ā
You stared. āWhat?ā
āThis section.ā
He took your notes and circled several lines.
āYouāre making assumptions based on incomplete data.ā
You snatched your papers back. āExcuse me?!ā
He blinked. āYou left them unattended.ā
āThat doesn't mean you get to criticize them! Theyāre just notes!ā
āYouāre welcome.ā
āI am not thanking you!ā
And somehowā
Neither of you stopped talking after that.
Days passed in familiar rhythms. Mornings in the House of Daena, books spread between you as sunlight filtered through towering windows. Evenings in the cozy tavern near the Akademiya, where you bickered over theories and interpretations like an old married couple, much to the amusementāand occasional concernāof onlookers.
Friendship with Alhaitham happened gradually. Neither of you noticed when arguments became discussions. Or when discussions became routines. Or when routines became something neither of you questioned anymore.
Mornings were spent in the House of Daena.
Afternoons often found the two of you seated in study areas around the Akademiya, books spread between you.
And eveningsā
Evenings belonged to the tavern.
āYour evidence is anecdotal.ā He spoke.
A vein popped up in your head. āYour standards are impossible.ā
āTheyāre reasonable.ā
āTheyāre suffocating.ā
āTheyāre practical.ā
āTheyāre boring.ā
āYou've said that three times.ā
āAnd I mean it every time.ā
Around you, the people often sighed.
Some students genuinely believed the two of you hated each other.
Others swore you were secretly married from how you two argue like one.Ā
Neither assumption was correct. At least, not yet.
āWhy are you following me?ā You groaned as you tried to lose Alhaitham in the dense forests of the region.Ā
āI'm not.ā He spoke, following you casually.Ā
āYou absolutely are.ā
āI happened to be walking this way.ā
āThere are no books in Gandharva Ville!ā
āThere are Forest Rangers.ā
You narrowed your eyes.
āAnd?ā
āAnd someone has to drag you back if you decide to wrestle a spinocrocodile.ā
āI've never even wrestled one! Whoās reckless enough to do that?!āĀ
āSays the one who attempted to approach one.ā
āI couldnāt help it! Its scales looked fascinating!ā
āIt looked hungry.ā
You laughed.
And despite himself, Alhaitham felt his lips twitch.
Just slightly.
āYou worry too much.ā You complained.Ā
āI prevent unnecessary incidents.ā
āThat's your way of saying you care.ā
āIt isn't.ā
āIt is.ā
āIt isn't.ā
āAlhaitham.ā
āOh look, a spinocrocodile.ā He commented, pointing in a random direction.Ā
āWHERE?!ā You whipped your head quickly, trying to find the spinocrocodile before deciding to run.Ā
He sighed, and followed behind you anyway.
Even with the risks of you encountering unwanted company or even trying to touch an animal, Alhaitham always had your back, supporting your endeavors in studying creatures offered by the region and following the footsteps of the author you idolized who didnāt get to finish their book.
He wanted to push you to your goal, and if it meant having to find you all over the forests of Sumeru and keeping you company to prevent you from going places you shouldnāt be in without preparation, then so be it.Ā
It was on one such day, beneath the filtered green light of the forest, that you told him something that he could not support you in.
āI think my thesis will be about Aranara.āĀ
He stopped walking, processing your words as if you said something unprecedented and quite ridiculous.Ā
āThatās irrational,ā he said immediately.
You turned to face him, raising an eyebrow. āExcuse me?ā
āNo adult has verifiably seen an Aranara,ā he continued, unbothered by your glare. āAccounts are inconsistent, unverifiable, and limited to children. It is not a sound foundation for a thesis.ā
āBut they exist,ā you insisted. āThere are patterns. Stories that align across the region. Cultural memory doesnāt form out of nothing. The book Iāve been reading even mentioned them, but the author didnāt get to explore much of it or even thought about them! Iāve talked to a Forest Watcher who also wants to find them. Weāre partnering up together to do so.ā
āBelief is not evidence,ā he said. āAnd basing your academic future on it is reckless. Even the author you idolized knows that thereās not enough evidence to even bother to try and look for an Aranara.ā
For the first time, you didnāt back down.
Instead, you smiled. āThen Iāll gather evidence.ā
Alhaitham frowned. He opened his mouth to argue, then stopped.
You spent less time together. Your conversations grew strained, circling the same argument without resolution. Alhaitham tried to dissuade you, presenting logical rebuttals, alternative thesis topics, compromises that would allow you to pursue your curiosity safely and rationally.
And you tried to make him believe.
Yet whenever you excitedly spoke about Varanara, Alhaitham listened. Even when he disagreed.
āI interviewed fifteen children.ā
āMhm.ā
āTheir descriptions match.ā
āMhm.ā
āThree of them independently described identical songs.ā
āMhm.ā
āAlhaitham.ā
āMhm.ā
āCould you sound less disinterested?ā
āI am listening.ā
You stared at him for a moment, your excitement quickly dwindling. āYou don't believe me.ā
He sighed.
āI believe in your determination.ā
You looked hurt. And he hated it.
Because he wantedā
Archons.
He wanted so desperately to believe.
To support you.
To encourage you.
But he knew the Akademiya.
He knew how cruel they could be.
How merciless they were toward ideas they deemed foolish.
He didn't want to watch you destroy yourself chasing something impossible.
āI want you to succeed,ā he said quietly. āBut not like this.ā
The argument that followed was your worst. It wasnāt like the usual arguments that you two constantly have together. This one was messy, loud, and ultimately the one that drove you off.Ā
āYou never listen!ā You spoke, standing up from your seat with an upset look.Ā
Despite your upset look, he remained calm. āAnd you refuse reason, you know the Akademiya is difficult.ā
āNot everything has to fit neatly inside your books!ā
āAnd not everything should be pursued blindly.āĀ
You couldnāt take it anymore. āThen maybe I should stop talking to you if you really think Iām a fool for pursuing this!ā
The words hit harder than either of you intended.
You froze.
He froze.
But pride, stupid, terrible pride kept both of you silent.
And so you left.
Three days passed. Then four. Then seven.Ā
There were no visits, no arguments, no⦠you.
The House of Daena felt strangely empty, the tavern quieter, and his home colder.
He hated noticing. And hated himself more for missing you.
He wished he could cheer for you openly. Push you forward. But he knewāknewāthat the Akademiya would never accept such a thesis. That you were setting yourself up for failure at best, danger at worst. He thought if he supported you, you wouldāve hated him for not trying to stop you and open your eyes.Ā
He wished he tried harder.
The knock came at night.
āAlhaitham.ā
He opened the door to find Tighnari standing there. He was ready to tell Tighnari he was uninterested in whatever he wanted to say, but he stopped his words when he noticed the way his friendās ears were low, his expression grave.
Alhaitham closed his mouth.Ā
āIām sorry,ā Tighnari said, voice full of remorse. āA forest watcher found them just outside Varanara. It seems they wandered into a Rishboland Tigerās territory.ā
No. No, that was impossible.
Not you.
You knew the forests better than most Rangers.
You knew animal behavior.
You understood territories.
You respected boundaries, you wouldnāt be foolish enough to try and approach one.Ā
You would have noticed.Ā
Wouldn't you?
He closed the door, not offering any response to Tighnari.
The silence that followed was oppressive. He stood there for a long moment, mind refusing to process what his heart already knew.
Were you⦠really gone? Just like that?Ā
That same night, he went to your home.
Your study was untouched. Books stacked neatly. Notes pinned meticulously to corkboards. Your thesis lay open on the desk.
He sat.
And read.
Hours passed. He traced your logic, followed your methodology, felt his chest tighten as he realized how thorough you had been. You had evidence. Patterns. Interviews. You had accounted for inconsistencies, refined testimonies, eliminated unreliable variables.
And slowly, painfully, he realized something.
Your workā¦
It was brilliant.
Not irrational.
Not reckless.
Brilliant.
Children could see Aranara because they had not yet lost the capacity to believe, and they are capable of things adults couldnāt do. They can dream.Ā
Because adulthood, you argued, was not wisdom, but erosion.
By dawn, Alhaitham sat motionless in your study, the first rays of morning filtering through the curtains and illuminating the countless pages spread before him.
Your handwriting.
Your observations.
Your dreams.
Hours had passed without him noticing.
Yet the heaviness in his chest had nothing to do with exhaustion.
It was regret.
Because perhaps, had he believed you sooner, things would have been different.
You would still be sitting across from him in the House of Daena, eyes bright with excitement as you rambled about a new discovery. You would still be exploring through the forests. You would still be finalizing your thesis, insisting that he read every page and criticize every flaw. You would still be arguing with him over multiple things.Ā
You would still be alive.
And he had not believed you.
But in the end, he chose reason over faith.
And now, all that remained of you were your notes and a silence he could no longer bear.
Suddenly, someone tried to open the front door.Ā
Alhaitham lifted his gaze.
When he opened it himself, he was greeted by none other than the Grand Sage himself, Azar.Ā
The older man's eyes widened slightly upon seeing him there.
"...Alhaitham."
The scribe said nothing. He merely watched.
The Grand Sage was quick to offer his condolences with practiced solemnity, speaking of tragedy and unfortunate circumstances, of how such accidents were inevitable within the rainforest.
But Alhaitham barely heard the words.
Instead, he found himself asking a far more unsettling question.
Why?
Why had the Grand Sage come personally?
You were merely another student.
Brilliant, yes, but not important enough to warrant the appearance of the Akademiya's highest authority.Ā
Something about it felt wrong.
Too deliberate.
Too convenient.
Because no matter how many times he replayed the reports in his mind, one fact remained.
You were not careless.
You knew the rainforest better than most Forest Rangers. You had dedicated your life to understanding its creatures, you respected their territories, and you knew the habits of Rishboland Tigers like the back of your hand.
There was no world in which you would simply wander into one unprepared.
No.Ā
Your curiosity had not killed you.
Something else had.
Something hidden.
Something sinister.
And judging by the man standing before him with his polished condolences and measured grief, Alhaitham had the terrible feeling that the answer lay much closer to the Akademiya than anyone realized.
The thought settled quietly within him.
Not anger.
Not outrage.
Suspicion.
And suspicion, once rooted in Alhaitham's mind, was not something easily removed.
So when the Grand Sage finally departed, he said nothing.
He asked no questions.
He offered no accusations.
Instead, he returned to your study.
Carefully, reverently, he gathered every page of your research into his arms.
Your thesis.
Your journals.
Your observations.
Even the little notes you had absentmindedly scribbled in the margins whenever inspiration struck.
He took the old adventurer's book as wellāthe one you cherished so dearly, the one whose unfinished story had inspired your own.
Back in his home, hidden behind a false compartment only he knew of, Alhaitham safeguarded them all, and hid the old adventurerās journal somewhere in the House of Daena.Ā
Not because he intended to claim your work, nor because he wished to bury it.
But because the world had already taken you.
He would not allow it to take what you loved as well.
As time flew long after your name faded from Akademiya conversations, long after new scholars occupied the desks you once sat at, but not long after the Grand Sage was finally gone, Alhaitham would occasionally unlock that compartment.Ā
He would reread your findings, mentally correct the occasional spelling error with quiet amusement, and sometimes, when the nights were particularly lonely, he would find himself in the House of Daena reading the adventurer's journal you adored and wondering why reading it always felt strangely familiar.
And in the silence of his home, with only books to accompany him and memories that refused to fade, Alhaitham allowed himself one bitter thought he would carry for the rest of his life.
A thought he never spoke aloud.
One that lingered long after the world had moved on.
Just finished reading your "Evermore" story and just wanted to share some of my thoughts and tell you that it is hands down one of the best things I have read in a while. I loved reading this so much that i devoured it one sitting. I came expecting to see more romance and love story with Diluc or Thoma based on tags, but I was pleasantly surprised that, yes even though there was romance between the characters, it focused more on readers growth, moving on, not forgetting the past but coming to terms with it and learning from it. This is probably the reason why I adored reading this so much, as well as because you did such an amazing job at writing all scenes and conveying characters' emotions. The whole breakup scene, the reasoning and story behind it, it was written incredibly well that I myself felt the pain that both Ayato and the reader were going through. As well as the whole unrequited love theme with Thoma made my feelings act up. One thing that I especially liked and it was refreshing to see was that the story didn't portray Ayato as some bad villain, toxic ex but as someone who truly loved reader, loved so much in fact, that he was willing to sacrifice his own freedom in order to protect reader, though still hurting reader in the process of it all.Ā I'm reading this story after it is finished, and I was saddened to learn that a lot of people were mad that the romance between the reader and Diluc did not blossom. I, too, was shocked at first, but the story and reasoning behind it explained things very well on why they couldn't be together, kinda like a right person, wrong time, in my opinion. I also felt that the situationship, experience that happened between them worked as a stepping stone towards readers further growth and acceptance that yes, even she did experience an immeasurable pain due to the heatbreak from first love she can still have a chance at love and her heart is not closed off. Therefore, I even prefer this outcome over reader and Diluc being the end game (I, of course, loved and enjoyed your versadies's, more fluffy version. Can't wait for the versadies's version of chapter 15). I also loved how this story focused on other characters' backstories and how it showed their point of view, which I often do not see in other stories. All in all, i wanted to say that I love you for coming up with this story, that your writing is incredible, and that I hope you never stop creating. Can't wait to read more of the "Evermore" epilogue parts when they come out, as well as your other stories that I will be feasting on as soon as I finish writing this. Again, thank you for this masterpieceā¤ļø
omg hi!! i was really surprised to see such a heartwarming message after i came back to this account (as i was hiatus for 2 years) but thank you soooo much for this! you really scored with the details and i can tell that you enjoyed the series so much from how much love i felt from your message š„¹š ty for enjoying my work and for your kind message, i hope you have a splendid day and never stop spreading love to fanfic writers like me out there <3 !!
I was CRAVING some good angst and reading two chapters back to back, even tough i'm not so fond of one of the characters AND UGHH it was so good i comolately ignored my prefrences.
Please make it hurt more in the coming chapters and show no mercy, i'm loving it here
-a fellow anon who fell in love with your writing
tysm for enjoying my writing anon !!! im very flattered that you still read them despite your preferences on a certain character HAHA š
and dont you worry, thereās more to come next week š„°š
SYNOPSIS (of part). In this second life, you were born in the fantastical nation of both lush rainforest and barren desert of Sumeru as a dedicated scholar of the Akademiya. As you decided to take on a new goal that could risk your entire education, your dearest friend has his concerns.
PAIRING. alhaitham x gn!reader
CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, unspoken love, major character death, possibly ooc and potential grammar errors!
WORD COUNT. 2692 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
PREVIOUS LIFE / NEXT LIFE
In your second life, you were born beneath Sumeruās canopy of knowledge, where wisdom was praised and curiosity a virtue sharpened to a blade. You entered the Akademiya under the Amurta Darshan with ink-stained hands and a mind that refused to rest. While others sought recognition, accolades, or swift ascension through academic ranks, you pursued something far less tangible.
A journal.
Not yoursāat least, not originally.
It was an adventurerās journal you found tucked away in the depths of the House of Daenaās archives, its pages yellowed and worn, its handwriting elegant yet intimate.Ā
The author wrote about creatures not as specimens, but as companions. They described Crystalflies as though they were fleeting miracles, foxes as clever little souls, Oceanids as tragic beings, and even the most dangerous creatures were written with understanding rather than fear.
You found yourself enchanted.
And as the days turned to weeks, the unknown adventurer became your favorite author. Sometimes, you laughed at their little notes scribbled in the margins. Sometimes, you teared up at the loneliness hidden between the lines.
And often, you wondered what kind of person could write with such tenderness.
The journal chronicled every nation.
Mondstadt.
Liyue.
Inazuma.
Sumeru.
Untilā
It stopped.
Midway through Snezhnaya. Not even a conclusion, no final entry, nor even a farewell.
The final page ended abruptly, as though the author had simply stood up one day and vanished. The last page was the publisherās note that explained what happened to the author, followed by an illustration of said author that you didnāt pay much attention to.Ā
It frustrated you endlessly.
āA shame,ā you murmured one afternoon, fingers brushing the unfinished page. āI wanted to know what happened to you.ā
There were no records regarding the adventurer beyond what they did in the Adventurers' Guild as well as the publisherās note. They had no descendants, no additional publications, nor even a documentation of their life.
And from that silence, a dream was born.
You wish to continue what they could notā
āYouāre staring again.ā
The sharp smack of a book against the crown of your head jolted you back to the present.
āOwā!ā You glared up, already knowing who it was. āAlhaitham.ā
The culprit regarded you with complete indifference. āYouāve been sitting in the same position for hours. That was your third missed meal today.ā
āI was just reading for research,ā you protested, rubbing a spot on your head where he smacked you.Ā
āYouāre neglecting your basic needs,ā he countered. āThat disqualifies it from being productive.ā
You scoffed. āYou sound like a pamphlet.ā
āAnd you sound like someone who needs to eat,ā he replied evenly, handing you the book youād been staring at. āCome on. Tavern.ā
That was Alhaithamāyour dearest friend, your constant, your unwanted but reliable tether to reality. Intelligent to an almost irritating degree, rational to the point of cruelty when he chose to be, and somehow always aware of where you were, what you were doing, and what you had forgotten to take care of.Ā
You met him early in your Akademiya years.Ā
He had sat across from you in the House of Daena and, without introduction or permission, spoke up after hearing your crazed mumblings over a class as you wrote down your notes.
āYour argument is flawed.ā
You stared. āWhat?ā
āThis section.ā
He took your notes and circled several lines.
āYouāre making assumptions based on incomplete data.ā
You snatched your papers back. āExcuse me?!ā
He blinked. āYou left them unattended.ā
āThat doesn't mean you get to criticize them! Theyāre just notes!ā
āYouāre welcome.ā
āI am not thanking you!ā
And somehowā
Neither of you stopped talking after that.
Days passed in familiar rhythms. Mornings in the House of Daena, books spread between you as sunlight filtered through towering windows. Evenings in the cozy tavern near the Akademiya, where you bickered over theories and interpretations like an old married couple, much to the amusementāand occasional concernāof onlookers.
Friendship with Alhaitham happened gradually. Neither of you noticed when arguments became discussions. Or when discussions became routines. Or when routines became something neither of you questioned anymore.
Mornings were spent in the House of Daena.
Afternoons often found the two of you seated in study areas around the Akademiya, books spread between you.
And eveningsā
Evenings belonged to the tavern.
āYour evidence is anecdotal.ā He spoke.
A vein popped up in your head. āYour standards are impossible.ā
āTheyāre reasonable.ā
āTheyāre suffocating.ā
āTheyāre practical.ā
āTheyāre boring.ā
āYou've said that three times.ā
āAnd I mean it every time.ā
Around you, the people often sighed.
Some students genuinely believed the two of you hated each other.
Others swore you were secretly married from how you two argue like one.Ā
Neither assumption was correct. At least, not yet.
āWhy are you following me?ā You groaned as you tried to lose Alhaitham in the dense forests of the region.Ā
āI'm not.ā He spoke, following you casually.Ā
āYou absolutely are.ā
āI happened to be walking this way.ā
āThere are no books in Gandharva Ville!ā
āThere are Forest Rangers.ā
You narrowed your eyes.
āAnd?ā
āAnd someone has to drag you back if you decide to wrestle a spinocrocodile.ā
āI've never even wrestled one! Whoās reckless enough to do that?!āĀ
āSays the one who attempted to approach one.ā
āI couldnāt help it! Its scales looked fascinating!ā
āIt looked hungry.ā
You laughed.
And despite himself, Alhaitham felt his lips twitch.
Just slightly.
āYou worry too much.ā You complained.Ā
āI prevent unnecessary incidents.ā
āThat's your way of saying you care.ā
āIt isn't.ā
āIt is.ā
āIt isn't.ā
āAlhaitham.ā
āOh look, a spinocrocodile.ā He commented, pointing in a random direction.Ā
āWHERE?!ā You whipped your head quickly, trying to find the spinocrocodile before deciding to run.Ā
He sighed, and followed behind you anyway.
Even with the risks of you encountering unwanted company or even trying to touch an animal, Alhaitham always had your back, supporting your endeavors in studying creatures offered by the region and following the footsteps of the author you idolized who didnāt get to finish their book.
He wanted to push you to your goal, and if it meant having to find you all over the forests of Sumeru and keeping you company to prevent you from going places you shouldnāt be in without preparation, then so be it.Ā
It was on one such day, beneath the filtered green light of the forest, that you told him something that he could not support you in.
āI think my thesis will be about Aranara.āĀ
He stopped walking, processing your words as if you said something unprecedented and quite ridiculous.Ā
āThatās irrational,ā he said immediately.
You turned to face him, raising an eyebrow. āExcuse me?ā
āNo adult has verifiably seen an Aranara,ā he continued, unbothered by your glare. āAccounts are inconsistent, unverifiable, and limited to children. It is not a sound foundation for a thesis.ā
āBut they exist,ā you insisted. āThere are patterns. Stories that align across the region. Cultural memory doesnāt form out of nothing. The book Iāve been reading even mentioned them, but the author didnāt get to explore much of it or even thought about them! Iāve talked to a Forest Watcher who also wants to find them. Weāre partnering up together to do so.ā
āBelief is not evidence,ā he said. āAnd basing your academic future on it is reckless. Even the author you idolized knows that thereās not enough evidence to even bother to try and look for an Aranara.ā
For the first time, you didnāt back down.
Instead, you smiled. āThen Iāll gather evidence.ā
Alhaitham frowned. He opened his mouth to argue, then stopped.
You spent less time together. Your conversations grew strained, circling the same argument without resolution. Alhaitham tried to dissuade you, presenting logical rebuttals, alternative thesis topics, compromises that would allow you to pursue your curiosity safely and rationally.
And you tried to make him believe.
Yet whenever you excitedly spoke about Varanara, Alhaitham listened. Even when he disagreed.
āI interviewed fifteen children.ā
āMhm.ā
āTheir descriptions match.ā
āMhm.ā
āThree of them independently described identical songs.ā
āMhm.ā
āAlhaitham.ā
āMhm.ā
āCould you sound less disinterested?ā
āI am listening.ā
You stared at him for a moment, your excitement quickly dwindling. āYou don't believe me.ā
He sighed.
āI believe in your determination.ā
You looked hurt. And he hated it.
Because he wantedā
Archons.
He wanted so desperately to believe.
To support you.
To encourage you.
But he knew the Akademiya.
He knew how cruel they could be.
How merciless they were toward ideas they deemed foolish.
He didn't want to watch you destroy yourself chasing something impossible.
āI want you to succeed,ā he said quietly. āBut not like this.ā
The argument that followed was your worst. It wasnāt like the usual arguments that you two constantly have together. This one was messy, loud, and ultimately the one that drove you off.Ā
āYou never listen!ā You spoke, standing up from your seat with an upset look.Ā
Despite your upset look, he remained calm. āAnd you refuse reason, you know the Akademiya is difficult.ā
āNot everything has to fit neatly inside your books!ā
āAnd not everything should be pursued blindly.āĀ
You couldnāt take it anymore. āThen maybe I should stop talking to you if you really think Iām a fool for pursuing this!ā
The words hit harder than either of you intended.
You froze.
He froze.
But pride, stupid, terrible pride kept both of you silent.
And so you left.
Three days passed. Then four. Then seven.Ā
There were no visits, no arguments, no⦠you.
The House of Daena felt strangely empty, the tavern quieter, and his home colder.
He hated noticing. And hated himself more for missing you.
He wished he could cheer for you openly. Push you forward. But he knewāknewāthat the Akademiya would never accept such a thesis. That you were setting yourself up for failure at best, danger at worst. He thought if he supported you, you wouldāve hated him for not trying to stop you and open your eyes.Ā
He wished he tried harder.
The knock came at night.
āAlhaitham.ā
He opened the door to find Tighnari standing there. He was ready to tell Tighnari he was uninterested in whatever he wanted to say, but he stopped his words when he noticed the way his friendās ears were low, his expression grave.
Alhaitham closed his mouth.Ā
āIām sorry,ā Tighnari said, voice full of remorse. āA forest watcher found them just outside Varanara. It seems they wandered into a Rishboland Tigerās territory.ā
No. No, that was impossible.
Not you.
You knew the forests better than most Rangers.
You knew animal behavior.
You understood territories.
You respected boundaries, you wouldnāt be foolish enough to try and approach one.Ā
You would have noticed.Ā
Wouldn't you?
He closed the door, not offering any response to Tighnari.
The silence that followed was oppressive. He stood there for a long moment, mind refusing to process what his heart already knew.
Were you⦠really gone? Just like that?Ā
That same night, he went to your home.
Your study was untouched. Books stacked neatly. Notes pinned meticulously to corkboards. Your thesis lay open on the desk.
He sat.
And read.
Hours passed. He traced your logic, followed your methodology, felt his chest tighten as he realized how thorough you had been. You had evidence. Patterns. Interviews. You had accounted for inconsistencies, refined testimonies, eliminated unreliable variables.
And slowly, painfully, he realized something.
Your workā¦
It was brilliant.
Not irrational.
Not reckless.
Brilliant.
Children could see Aranara because they had not yet lost the capacity to believe, and they are capable of things adults couldnāt do. They can dream.Ā
Because adulthood, you argued, was not wisdom, but erosion.
By dawn, Alhaitham sat motionless in your study, the first rays of morning filtering through the curtains and illuminating the countless pages spread before him.
Your handwriting.
Your observations.
Your dreams.
Hours had passed without him noticing.
Yet the heaviness in his chest had nothing to do with exhaustion.
It was regret.
Because perhaps, had he believed you sooner, things would have been different.
You would still be sitting across from him in the House of Daena, eyes bright with excitement as you rambled about a new discovery. You would still be exploring through the forests. You would still be finalizing your thesis, insisting that he read every page and criticize every flaw. You would still be arguing with him over multiple things.Ā
You would still be alive.
And he had not believed you.
But in the end, he chose reason over faith.
And now, all that remained of you were your notes and a silence he could no longer bear.
Suddenly, someone tried to open the front door.Ā
Alhaitham lifted his gaze.
When he opened it himself, he was greeted by none other than the Grand Sage himself, Azar.Ā
The older man's eyes widened slightly upon seeing him there.
"...Alhaitham."
The scribe said nothing. He merely watched.
The Grand Sage was quick to offer his condolences with practiced solemnity, speaking of tragedy and unfortunate circumstances, of how such accidents were inevitable within the rainforest.
But Alhaitham barely heard the words.
Instead, he found himself asking a far more unsettling question.
Why?
Why had the Grand Sage come personally?
You were merely another student.
Brilliant, yes, but not important enough to warrant the appearance of the Akademiya's highest authority.Ā
Something about it felt wrong.
Too deliberate.
Too convenient.
Because no matter how many times he replayed the reports in his mind, one fact remained.
You were not careless.
You knew the rainforest better than most Forest Rangers. You had dedicated your life to understanding its creatures, you respected their territories, and you knew the habits of Rishboland Tigers like the back of your hand.
There was no world in which you would simply wander into one unprepared.
No.Ā
Your curiosity had not killed you.
Something else had.
Something hidden.
Something sinister.
And judging by the man standing before him with his polished condolences and measured grief, Alhaitham had the terrible feeling that the answer lay much closer to the Akademiya than anyone realized.
The thought settled quietly within him.
Not anger.
Not outrage.
Suspicion.
And suspicion, once rooted in Alhaitham's mind, was not something easily removed.
So when the Grand Sage finally departed, he said nothing.
He asked no questions.
He offered no accusations.
Instead, he returned to your study.
Carefully, reverently, he gathered every page of your research into his arms.
Your thesis.
Your journals.
Your observations.
Even the little notes you had absentmindedly scribbled in the margins whenever inspiration struck.
He took the old adventurer's book as wellāthe one you cherished so dearly, the one whose unfinished story had inspired your own.
Back in his home, hidden behind a false compartment only he knew of, Alhaitham safeguarded them all, and hid the old adventurerās journal somewhere in the House of Daena.Ā
Not because he intended to claim your work, nor because he wished to bury it.
But because the world had already taken you.
He would not allow it to take what you loved as well.
As time flew long after your name faded from Akademiya conversations, long after new scholars occupied the desks you once sat at, but not long after the Grand Sage was finally gone, Alhaitham would occasionally unlock that compartment.Ā
He would reread your findings, mentally correct the occasional spelling error with quiet amusement, and sometimes, when the nights were particularly lonely, he would find himself in the House of Daena reading the adventurer's journal you adored and wondering why reading it always felt strangely familiar.
And in the silence of his home, with only books to accompany him and memories that refused to fade, Alhaitham allowed himself one bitter thought he would carry for the rest of his life.
A thought he never spoke aloud.
One that lingered long after the world had moved on.
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SYNOPSIS (of part). before the heroic traveler and their most trusted guide became known among the lands, youāre an adventurer whoās known among your guild for your lifetime goal: to document every creature in teyvat that you could find across all seven regionsāuntil, you found something else thatās much more memorable than your adventures.
PAIRING. zhongli x gn!reader
CONTENT. fluff/angst, angst w/ no comfort, unspoken love, major character death (potential grammar errors and possibly ooc!)
WORD COUNT. 2060 words
WEAVED MASTERLIST / NAVIGATION
NEXT LIFE
You arrived in Liyue as a traveler, carrying dust from foreign roads and a journal already thick with pressed petals, charcoal sketches, and ink-smudged annotations written in a careful, slanted hand. Word of you preceded your footsteps. Some spoke of you as a respected adventurer. Others whispered more cautiouslyāa traveler who lets curiosity get to places they donāt belong in.
Liyue, however, did not recoil from you. It watched.
The harbor greeted you with the low murmur of commerce and the slow sway of lanterns in the breeze, foundations bearing centuries of memory beneath your boots. You paused often, gaze drifting not toward the busy markets that Liyue has to offer, but to the mountains beyond, to the way the land curved inward as though sheltering something precious thatās not been explored just yet.
āYou seem lost,ā a voice remarked behind you. Calm. Deep. Unhurried, as if they have all the time in the world.
You turned around to find a man standing just a step away, hands folded neatly behind his back. He no doubt caught your eye with his words, and you noted that he stood out from most of the citizens. His amber eyes were observant without being invasive, his posture composed in a way that felt⦠practiced. He looked like someone who belonged to this place not merely by residence, but by understanding and time.
āIām not lost,ā you replied. āJust listening.ā
He raised a brow slightly. āListening?ā
āTo the land,ā you said, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.
A pause. Then, faint amusement curved his lips. If it were another person, they wouldāve raised an eyebrow and thought of you as crazy.
But Zhongli was not like another. āLiyue does speak, to those inclined to hear it. Still, many visitors find its dialect difficult.ā
You studied him openly, closing your journal shut. āAnd you would be fluent?ā
āI have had time to learn,ā he said. āIf you would permit me, I could guide you. It would be⦠unwise for someone of your reputation to wander unattended.ā
Ah. There it was.
āSo youāve heard of me,ā you said lightly.
āOnly rumors,ā he answered, smoothly sidestepping the weight of them. āBut I find it better to judge a person by their words, rather than the fear they inspire. Liyue is also unpredictable and easy to get lost in.ā
āAnd youāre offering?ā you asked, amused.
āIf youāll allow it,ā he replied. āI am Zhongli.ā
There was no flourish to his introduction, no grand titles or even a flair. And yet, something in your chest stirred.
āVery well, then. Lead the way.ā
That was how Zhongli came to walk beside you as a companion whose steps matched yours with effortless ease.
At first, he was careful. Observant. You noticed the way his gaze lingered on the sigils you absentmindedly traced in the air when thinking, the way his tone never sharpened even when you asked questions that brushed dangerously close to truths long buried beneath stone and contract, and the way he never questions your curiosity for the unknown.
You learned the cadence of his voice as he spoke of Liyueās traditions, of agreements honored and broken, of gods who once walked openly among mortals. He spoke not as a historian reciting facts, but as someone recalling lived memory.
Though you could not yet name that feeling just yet.
In turn, you told him of your travels. Of beasts cataloged in frozen valleys, of ruins half-swallowed by forests, of creatures with impeccable abilities and ways of surviving the wild, of treasures others dismissed as myth because no one had bothered to listen long enough.
āMost people want certainty,ā you said one evening as you sat overlooking the harbor, lantern light reflecting in your eyes. āThey want the world neatly labeled. But mysteries donāt exist to be conquered, but to be understood.ā
Zhongli regarded you with quiet intensity. āThat is a rare perspective.ā
āIs it?ā
āYes.ā He paused, then added softly, āAnd a dangerous one.ā
You laughed. āIāve been told.ā
Days turned into weeks. Weeks into months.
You stayed far longer than intended.
Zhongli became a constant presenceāguiding you through ancient stone paths, sharing meals with you in teahouses tucked away from the noise of the city. You began to notice the subtleties in him: the way he always positioned himself slightly to your left, the way he remembered the smallest details of your preferences, the way his gaze softened when you grew animated over a new discovery.
But what attracted you most was how passionate he is when talking about his homeland, Liyue.
āYou care deeply for this land,ā you said one afternoon, watching the harbor from a high terrace. Time flew and it was already the annual Lantern Rite festival, a celebration that Zhongli urged you to not miss.
āIt has given me much,ā Zhongli replied, watching with you. āIt would be ungrateful of me not to return the sentiment.ā
You smiled. āI think I understand that.ā
And soon, Liyue became more familiar than any region youāve been in. In time, the two of you walked the city together until merchants greeted you both by name, until teahouse owners knew your order without asking, until you now know how to navigate your way around the mountains and temples of Liyue. You wrote in your journal while he watched, occasionally offering quiet corrections or historical context.
āYou never tell me what you plan to do once your travels end,ā he remarked one evening, voice mild as you packed your things away in your camp.
You paused.
You havenāt really thought of what happens after your journal is done. The whole time you spent was thinking of what creatures youād encounter and places youāll be in, but never what happens after youāve explored everything.
What is there for you after all of this?
āI⦠donāt know,ā you admitted, your shoulders sinking.
He looked at you then, truly looked without judgement. He never judged you, and he never will. Something youāve come to appreciate more. āNo destination at all?ā
You hesitated, fingers tightening around your journalāthe only thing that mattered. Or so you thought. āI suppose Iāve been moving for so long that stopping never felt⦠necessary.ā
āAnd after?ā he pressed gently. āWhen there are no more pages left to fill?ā
The question lingered, heavier than you expected. You opened your mouth, then closed it.
For the first time, you realized the truth:
There was no home waiting for you.
No place that belonged to you in the way others spoke of with certainty. All you had was your guild, your campsites, and⦠your journal.
āI donāt think I have one,ā you said quietly.
Something shifted in his expressionānot pity, but understanding.
āThen,ā Zhongli said after a moment, āperhaps home is not a place you return to. Perhaps it is something youāll find along your way.ā
You looked at him, heart unsteady.
In the latter time of your stay in Liyue, it felt slow in a gentle way only happiness seems to allow.
Soon enough, conversations about Liyue had segue to something more personal. You told him of your childhood, fragmented and nomadic, but still precious to you as you reaccount them.
Meanwhile, he in turn told you stories of his experiences in Liyue that seemed to feel as though heās been living for centuries. But you never seem to push on that matter, knowing that in time, maybe your dear friend will open up to you just as you had.
He was a remarkable listener. He never interrupted, never rushed your thoughts, as though every word you offered him was a treasure.
And you were endearing to him in ways he had not anticipated. The way you lit up when discovering something new or a creature you havenāt seen before. The way you frowned when logic failed you and then laughed at yourself. The way you appreciated the world aloud, softly, whenever something beautiful caught your eye.
You fell in love slowly. So did he.
On the final day of your stay, the realization settled heavy and sudden in your chest. You stood beside him overlooking the harbor, ships drifting lazily below.
āWhen Iām done,ā you said, voice barely steady, āI want to come back.ā
Zhongli turned to you. āBack to Liyue?ā
You shook your head. āBack to you.ā
For a long moment, he said nothing. The words were simple, sweet. But knowing you, it was more than just you wanting to return. It was you telling him that Liyue is home.
Heās your home.
Then he smiledānot the polite curve he wore so often, but something genuine, unguarded.
āI am nothing if not patient,ā he said. āWherever your path leads, I will always wait.ā
The promise settled between you, warm and certain.
Before you left, you pressed an earring into his handāa small, jeweled tassel earring you had worn for years. āSo you wonāt forget me,ā you teased.
To your surprise, he laughed then. Truly laughed. The sound startled even him. āHow could I forget someone like you?ā
You parted with lingering glances and promises written not in ink, but in memory.
The letters began a week later.
Your handwriting was familiar to himāprecise, clear, alive with curiosity. You wrote of your travels, of strange creatures and colder lands, of moments where you thought of Liyue and smiled.
He wrote back with equal care, his words measured and thoughtful. He told you of the harbor, of changes small and large, of how the land continued to endure. He never once spoke of how empty your absence made the days feel, nor the things around him that reminded him so much of you.
The letters came every week.
He waited for them.
He arranged his days around them.
Two years passed.
Liyue flourished. Contracts were upheld. He was still a god who continued to act as Zhongli, consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. And stillāhe waited.
Your letters grew fewer as your journey reached its end. The last one spoke of Snezhnaya. Of cold air that burned the lungs. Of excitement tinged with fatigue.
āIāll be home soon,ā you wrote. āJust one more region.ā
At that, he wrote back to you; to be careful and always stay safe, never putting to words how excited he was to see you at last.
Perhaps, once you return, it is time for him to finally step down from his role.
He waited more.
A week later, your letter never came.
He thought you mustāve been busy, too engrossed with your discoveries that you have forgotten to write. Or maybe the cold mustāve made you unable to send a letter to the postal office.
But then another week came.
And another.
Until two months have passed.
Not once did you write.
And yet, he still waited.
Until Katheryne visited.
The words reached him like distant thunder, muffled and unreal. You had fallen ill. Rapidly. No remedy had sufficed.
You were gone.
Zhongli did not speak.
He attended your funeral in silence, hands folded as they always were, amber eyes fixed on the ground as though the world itself had become too heavy to look upon. Others spokeāfriends, fellow adventurers, people who youāve bonded in your travels, voices thick with grief.
He said nothing for the first time.
When he returned home, the rooms felt vast and hollow. Your last letter lay open on his desk, ink faded where his thumb had traced the words too many times.
He did not sleep.
Days passed. Weeks. The city continued on, vibrant and alive, but something fundamental had dimmed.
The world felt⦠quieter.
Less colorful.
He moved through it as though wrapped in glass, distant from the warmth of sound and light. Conversations washed over him without purchase. Even the stone beneath his feet felt colder.
At night, he found himself standing in the same terrace where you spoke your promise of reuniting with him after all your travels, the earring resting in his palm, and listened to the silence where your voice should have been.
For the first time in his long existence, Zhongli had nothing to say.
He knew mortality is a fragile thing and nothing would last forever. But never once did he think yours would end so fast. So⦠rushed.
And somewhere beyond the veil of death, your soul began its journey again, unaware that a man who had once loved you with gentle devotion would remember you forever.
ADDRESSED. varka, jean, wanderer, baizhu, and zhongli (x gn!reader)
STAMPS. hungry hearts diner au wherein you manage your grandfather's restaurant in your hometown and meet different customers with different stories to tell (all parts are connected but you can read them separately!)
CONTENT. fluff, angst with comfort, major character death, mentions of overworking, possibly ooc with grammar errors!
LINKS. masterlist \ taglist
In a tiny side street in a nameless neighborhood sits an old diner that welcomes all travelers and customers needing a hot meal. Slide the door open and you shall be greeted by a kindly young person rather than a grumpy and busy old man. Said grumpy old man is actually the young personās grandfather, who the young person had come to his aid in managing the restaurant after taking a break from the busy life of the city.
So take a seat, order a hot meal, and let the tension flow out of you. The peace will do you good.Ā
You sighed, looking through your grandfather's old notebooks that contained the recipes of his beloved restaurant, carefully taking note of certain ingredients and techniques used.
Honestly, when your grandfather called you for the first time in months asking for help due to his illness, you thought he meant help in taking care of himānot his restaurant!
Still, it was rare for your grandfather to even ask for anything, and truth be told, you had missed your hometown dearly. So, seeing no reason to refuse, you packed your things and returned to the quiet little neighborhood you once called home.
After all, taking over an old diner for a while couldn't be that difficult.
Right?
On the first day, one of the customers who came to your restaurant calls himself Varka.
Youāve come to learn from one of your elderly customers that Varka is currently the community leader of the neighborhood, often found roaming around the streets and helping everyone who needs it as he often does his best to ensure the neighborhood is safe and happy.
When he first came in, he was expecting to be greeted by your grumpy grandfather, only to be shocked when he saw you instead. You didnāt even realize the broad and muscular blonde man is the infamous Varka himself until he introduced himself. From how much the grannies and children praised him, you thought Varka was an old man.
After you introduced yourself in return, Varka was delighted, as he often heard of you from your grandfather
āWhy donāt I give you a tour? To help you catch up with what youāve missed since you last came?ā
It didnāt take long before he became your frequent customer. His order is always a hearty meal accompanied by alcohol, often asking for seconds.
Each time he visits, he is joyous as ever, greeting the customers before sitting down on the stool in front of the counter where he can watch you prepare meals. He talks about his daily errands, how much work there is to do, how he had stopped another conflict between two particular neighbors, and how kids are getting bigger and bigger each day.
Varka is beloved by everyone in the neighborhood.
The grandmothers often stuff homemade snacks into his hands, while children excitedly run over to him whenever he passes by.
Whenever there is trouble, everyoneās first thought is always the same.
āCall Varka.ā
Stray cats stuck on trees? Call Varka.
A couple having an argument? Call Varka.
Festival preparations? Call Varka.
Carrying heavy groceries? Call Varka.
Varka always responds with a cheerful smile.
āLeave it to me!ā
Sometimes, while eating, his phone rings over and over again.
Despite sighing dramatically, he never once refuses.
āAh, duty calls!ā
You quickly come to realize that the community leader practically works twenty-four hours a day.Ā Ā
Despite how busy he is, he never misses a visit to the restaurant.
Sometimes he arrives with dirt on his clothes after helping someone push their car all the way to the nearest gas station.Ā
Sometimes with scratches after rescuing a cat.
Once, he came drenched in rain after helping an elderly resident whose roof had begun leaking.
And every single time, he greets you with the same smile.
āEvening! Smells wonderful in here!ā
It becomes a habit for you to prepare his favorite dishes whenever he drops by.
To your surprise, Varka remembers your favorite snacks too.
Whenever he discovers a new addition to the local bakery or receives gifts from the neighborhood grandmothers, he often shares them with you.
āCan't let all these sweets go to waste, right?ā
The regular customers often tease the two of you.
āLook at that, Varka's already making himself at home.ā
āYou youngsters are cute.ā
āMaybe we'll hear wedding bells before long!ā
Varka merely laughs loudly while you become embarrassed.Ā
āWhoa there, letās not get hasty!ā He replied.Ā
However, as months pass, you begin noticing something strange.
Although Varka knows everyoneā¦
Nobody seems to know much about him.
People ask about his health in passing, but conversations quickly return to their own problems.
Everyone depends on him, praises him, and loves him.
Yet even so, nobody ever asks what he wants, how his day went, or whether he was tired.
One night, when business was slow, you find Varka sitting alone at the counter.
The usual smile on his face is absent.
Instead, he quietly stares into his untouched drink.
āLong day?ā you ask.
He chuckles.
āLong life, more like.ā
For once, he doesn't talk about the neighborhood.
He doesn't talk about work.
He doesn't talk about anyone else.
He simply watches you cook.
After a long silence, he softly says:
āFunny, isn't it?ā
āI've lived here for decades, watched kids grow up, helped people get married, seen neighbors become grandparents. But when I come homeā¦ā
He stays silent for a moment. āIt's always quiet.ā
He laughs afterward, as though trying to brush away his own words.
āHaha! Listen to me sounding all gloomy. Guess even I get sentimental.ā
You can't help but feel that, despite all the laughter surrounding himā¦
Varka has been lonely for a very, very long time.
You talk about it with your grandfather after helping him get to bed, only for your grandfather to let out a huff.
āAh, that rascal? He has always been alone. Even back when I first met him, he was already running around helping everyone. I used to tell him to slow down and enjoy his youth. Did he listen?āĀ
Your grandfather snorts, before continuing, āof course not.ā
āAlways saying things like, āSomeone's got to do it!āā He clicks his tongue at the thought. āBrat nearly worked himself into the grave more times than I can count.ā
Curious, you ask if Varka has any family.
Your grandfather becomes unusually quiet.
āNot anymore. Lost his parents at a young age. And he never married or found anyone special either. All because he was too busy. Busy helping this neighborhood and everyone else. Before he knew it, the years had passed.ā
Your grandfather sighs.
āThe fool practically raised half the kids around here. He fixed roofs, settled arguments, carried groceries, stayed up all night during storms checking on people, never asked for anything in return, and somehowā¦ā
He crosses his arms.
āThat idiot became everyone's family. Except nobody ever realized he didn't have one of his own.ā
You quietly recall how Varka always talks about everyone else's lives.
But never his own.
āDoesn't he have close friends?ā You ask.
āHm.ā Your grandfather nodded. āPlenty. But friendship's a funny thing.ā
āPeople come and go. Some move away. Some get busy with life. Othersā¦ā
Your grandfather glances out the window.
āWell⦠Life happens.ā
He hesitated for a moment. āBut every evening, rain or shine⦠That rascal always came here. Sat right by the stool in front of the counter, ordered enough food for three people,Ā talked about work, and made me listen to his stories before leaving.āĀ
Your grandfather chuckles softly.
āTruth be told, I think this old restaurant was his refuge. A place where nobody needed him to be some hero and leader heās expected to be.āĀ
He then looks at you knowingly.
āAnd you know⦠Ever since you came back⦠He's smiling differently. That rascal used to come and eat before leaving. Now? I can see him lingering, talking more, laughing louder. And sometimes I catch him staring into the kitchen with the strangest look I've ever seen.ā
He laughs. āHah⦠Hopeless fool.ā
Your grandfather settles himself under the blankets.
When you turned off the lights, he spoke up once again, this time in a serious tone.Ā
āTake good care of him.āĀ
You paused, staying still to listen.Ā
The old man looks up at the ceiling, a thoughtful look plastered on his face. āPeople like Varka⦠They'll spend their whole lives taking care of others. But they don't know how to ask for someone to take care of them.ā
After a moment, your grandfather mutters one final thing.
āHe's a good man. Far too good.ā
ā...And good people deserve a place to feel at peace.ā
After that night, you begin paying more attention to Varka.
Just as he notices when your ingredients are running low or when you've had a long day, you begin noticing the little things about him.
The way he stretches his shoulders whenever he thinks no one is looking, the way he sometimes falls asleep sitting upright at the counter after finishing his meal, and the way he often stares outside the window with a distant look before quickly smiling once more whenever someone greets him.
Before long, setting aside a portion for Varka becomes second nature.
āYou're late today,ā you would tell him.
And he would laugh. āSorry, sorry! Ms. Margaretās cat ended up on the roof again.ā
Or perhaps: āThe neighborhood kids challenged me to a soccer match. Can you believe they actually beat me?ā
Or: āOld Mr. Wagner insisted I help him fix his garden. Three hours later, I was still pulling weeds.ā
Slowly, his stories stop revolving around problems.
He starts telling you about the little things.
A funny joke one of the children told him.
The flowers are blooming in the park.
His favorite songs are playing on the radio.
Memories of his travels.
The festivals he attended in his youth.
Even embarrassing stories that make you laugh until your stomach hurts.
āDon't you dare tell anyone I lost an arm wrestling match to Klee.ā He said, though itās clear he was just being easy on the cheery kid.Ā
Without either of you noticing, the restaurant becomes part of his daily routine.
If he misses a day, the grandmothers ask where he is.
If he arrives late, you unconsciously glance at the door every few minutes.
And every evening, Varka takes his usual seat in front of the counter.
āEvening.ā
āWelcome back.ā
The regular customers eventually stop saying that Varka is visiting your restaurant.
Instead, they say teasingly: āAh, Varka's home.ā
One rainy evening, as you started cleaning up, you found him sleeping on the counter.
His meal had gone cold.
Concerned, you gently wake him.
āVarka?ā
He slowly opens his eyes.
āā¦Ah, sorry. Guess I was more tired than I thought.āĀ
Instead of getting up immediately like usual, he remains seated, quiet and looking strangely vulnerable.
Then, with a sheepish smile, he admits: āI think this might be my favorite place.ā
You stare at him in surprise, and he continues, āwhenever I walk through those doors⦠I feel like I can finally stop. I don't have to be the community leader who solves everyone's problems. I can just⦠eat, relax, and enjoy myself.ā
He chuckles.
āMaybe I've gotten spoiled.ā
He looks at you, his usual grin returning. āYou spoil me too much.ā
But despite his teasing tone, you can tell he means every word.
Eventually, even the neighborhood begins to notice.
Varka smiles more, and he actually takes days off, stops skipping meals, spends less time worrying about everyone else, and more time enjoying himself.
The grandmothers are delighted.
āHe's finally putting on some weight!ā
āHe looks younger!ā
āLook at those rosy cheeks!ā
Some even whisper to you with knowing smiles. āHeās happier when he visits you,ā as if he went to your grandfatherās restaurant for more than just the food.Ā
āHe deserves happiness too.ā
One day, while looking through your grandfatherās calendar, you discover something surprising.
Varka's birthday is approaching.
You excitedly ask him what his plans are when he comes to visit.Ā
He blinks, swallowing his food.
āPlans?ā
āAhā¦Nothing, I suppose. I'll probably just work.ā
You nearly drop the ladle in your hands.
āWork?!ā
Varka laughs.
āBirthdays aren't really a big deal. Besides, everyone's busy with their own lives. No need to make a fuss over a man like me.ā He says it so casually.
As though he genuinely expects nothing, as though he's grown used to spending that day alone.
Your heart aches at the thought.
So, together with your sickly grandfather and the regular customers, you secretly begin preparing.
The grandmothers bake desserts, the children draw cards, a few neighbors volunteer to handle the decorations, and even the neighborhood butcher donates his best meat.
Everyone was working together.
Because for years⦠Varka has celebrated everyone else's joys.
And now⦠It is finally their turn to celebrate his joy.
On the day itself, Varka was dumbfounded by the fact that not a single person in the neighborhood asked him any errands to help them with. The grandmothersā pipes were doing well, the children were busy with homework (on a weekend????), and even the neighbors who usually argue are suddenly getting along well.Ā
It was only until late at night you called for him for an emergency when he quickly ran.
When he slides open the door to your restaurant, he freezes.
āSURPRISE!ā
The entire restaurant erupts with cheers.
Balloons, streamers, mountains of food were all over the restaurant as elderly residents, children and families had all gathered together.Ā
All were the people he has helped throughout the years.
Some had traveled from other districts and even countries just to see him and celebrate his birthday.Ā
Everyone is smiling.
Everyone is laughing.
Everyone is here.
Varka stands motionless.
Completely stunned.
āW-What⦠What's all this?ā
Little Klee runs over and hugs his leg.
āHappy birthday, Mister Varka!ā
Ms. Margaret wipes tears from her eyes.
āIt's about time we spoiled you for once.ā
Old Mr. Wagner laughs. āNo running any errands today!ā
The children hand him handmade cards.
The grandmothers fusses over whether he's eating enough.
And your grandfather, whoās sitting on a wheelchair with his doctor behind him, grins.
āBrat. Thought we'd forgotten your birthday?ā
Varka's eyes slowly widen.
Before anyone can reactā¦
The great and mighty Varka quickly turned away from the crowd, hurriedly wiping his eyes.
He was tearing up.Ā
He then turned back to them and laughed, though there was a hint of shakiness in it.Ā Ā
āThank youā¦ā
āThank you, everyone.ā
And for the first time in yearsā¦
Varka celebrates his birthday not as the community leader that the whole neighborhood relies on, but simply as Varka.
Surrounded by people who love him.
Long after the party ends and everyone returns home, Varka stays behind.
Together, the two of you clean the restaurant.
The room is quiet.
Warm.
Peaceful.
Looking at the leftover decorations, he chuckles.
āYou really got me good. I was planning to just celebrate on my own and drink to my heartās content.ā
You smile.
āNobody forgot, just so you know.ā You spoke with a warm smile. āEveryone really wanted to celebrate with you.ā
Varka gazes around the diner. He looked at the counter, the stools, the kitchen, the little wish board hanging on the wallā
And finallyā¦
At you.
His eyes soften. So incredibly soft.
āYou knowā¦ā
āI've spent so much of my life making sure others have somewhere to be. But somewhere along the wayā¦ā
He smiles, warmth radiating out of him.
āI found my own place too.ā
Before leaving that night, Varka walks over to the restaurantās wish board, something your grandmother had put back when your grandfather first opened the restaurantāa tradition for every customer to at least write one wish.Ā Ā
Picking up a pen, he thinks for a moment.
Then, with a gentle smile, he writes:
"I wish to spend the rest of my days surrounded by those I love."
On the upper corner of the paper, he draws a small smiling sun.
And from that day onward, whenever he walks through the doors of the old diner, he always says the same thing.
āI'm back.ā
To which you always answer:
āWelcome back, Varka!ā
If there's one thing particular about Jean that you notice, it was the fact that she always comes to the restaurant in her uniform.Ā
She comes exactly at 20:00 after work, looking exhausted as ever as she settles down in the corner of the restaurant by the window and opens her laptop to work some more.
Given your experience from the city, you knew what it was like to be in her shoes.
So when you came to get her order, you weren't surprised to be greeted by her dozing state.
And it has become a familiar sight since then.
Her order was always the same thing: pizza paired with coffee; something easy to eat while working.
The sounds of her typing on her keyboard can be heard every time she comes, to the point where it starts to become weird if you don't hear it at night.
Sometimes, she stays until closing time.
And even then, she would only leave after answering one last email.
"Miss Jean, we're closing soon." You spoke with a polite smile.Ā
"Ah. My apologies." She spoke, flustered. "I'll just finish this report and be on my way."
There were times when she accidentally fell asleep with her glasses still on, or when she forgot to touch her food until it had already gone cold.
Whenever you reminded her, she would simply smile apologetically.
"Sorry. I got carried away⦠Again."
Despite how busy she always was, Jean never once failed to thank you for every meal.
"Thank you. It was delicious as always."
And she always smiled the most whenever she said those words.
One night, you heard the sounds of soft sneezes and sniffles.
When you checked on Jean, it was clear that she was sick.
To your dismay, when you told her to take a break from work and rest tomorrow, she simply shook her head in response.
"Thank you for your concern, but⦠I can't afford to call in sick. I have an important meeting tomorrow that I cannot miss.ā She said softly, trying to smile reassuringly towards you before sneezing once again.
When you came back once more with her order, she was surprised to see a warm bowl of cream stew on the side.
"It's on the house," you explained softly, "if you can't be absent tomorrow, at least try to take care of yourself."
Her eyes widened in surprise. Before she could protest and insist on paying, you quickly left her on her own to tend to other customers.
She didn't touch her laptop after that.
Instead, she quietly stared at the cream stew.
Her expression softened.
And for a brief momentā¦
You thought she looked like she was about to cry.
She didn't come to the restaurant the next day.
But on the day after, she returned, not as sick as before.
When you took her order, she decided to order an additional meal.
"I'd also like some cream stew on the side, if that's alright."
Over time, you've grown to care about the overworked businesswoman.
As you continue to observe her, you begin to realize that beneath all the work she's been doing every time she visits, there's always something behind her eyes that just made you know that this was something beyond work.
When you asked Varka about Jean, he could only sigh in response.
"Her parents passed away back when she had just turned twenty-one, leaving her to take care of her sister, Barbara, who was still young at the time." He said with a serious look.
"Jean eventually got hired to a company that offered a high pay, enough to help provide for Barbara's school. Though⦠not a lot of people liked that company, as it was known for often overworking its employees."
"I even tried to convince Jean to try out a different company, but she insisted the one she's in had the best benefits for Barbara and didn't want to risk losing it."
Your heart sank hearing her story. "...Where's Barbara now?"
"Oh, she's second year in college already."
Varka sighed. "But⦠it's like the two of them weren't as close as they used to be. Not when Jean is always on her laptop the whole time and never having the time to go to any of Barbara's school events."
You began to understand the businesswoman more after that.
One evening, while cleaning up empty plates, you suddenly asked out of curiosity:
"Miss Jean⦠Do you really enjoy that cream stew I made?"
Jean paused, her fingers froze above her keyboard.
For a moment, the sounds of typing stopped.Ā
And after a long silenceā¦
She smiled. A sad kind.
"Sorry if itās weird.. I-Itās just⦠it reminded me a lot of my little sister, Barbara, back when she was little."
She began to reminisce a little, a longing but pained look on her face. āOur mom would make cream stew for me whenever Iām sick, and sheād proudly stay by her momās side and bring me bowls without fail, wanting to see me feel better."
Jean let out a small laugh.
āI always finish them even when Iām already full, because she looked so happy."
Her smile gradually weakened.
"I don't think I've had cream stew since then⦠Not since our parents died."
āShe probably doesn't even remember anymore."
You began to regret asking her that question, unaware of how much such dish meant to her.Ā
As if reading your mind, she smiled sadly. āThank you for asking though. I.. I guess I needed to get that out of my chest.ā She said reassuringly.Ā
Eventually, Jean began coming to the restaurant without opening her laptop immediately.
Sometimes she actually ate while her food was still warm.
Sometimes she stayed simply to talk.
And one evening, she quietly asked:
"Do you think⦠It's too late?"
When you stopped cleaning the stove for a moment to look at her, she quickly clarified her question.
"...Do you think itās⦠too late for me to fix things? With her?"
You shook your head, already knowing what she meant.
"No."
"Itās never too late to fix things. Not if both people still care." You said softly. āBelieve me. I learned that the hard way.āĀ
A few weeks later, Jean didn't show up.
Nor the day after.
Nor the day after that.
You found yourself glancing at the door every evening, wondering if she was drowning in work.
Until nearly a week later.
The familiar bell rang.
"Welcomeā"
You froze.
Jean stood there.
Looking happier than you had ever seen her.
Beside her stood a younger woman with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.
"Good afternoon!" The younger woman greeted cheerfully, waving at you.
"You must be the one my sister always talks about!"
Jean actually looked embarrassed.
"Barbara⦠Must you say that?"
"But it's true!" Barbara giggled softly.
That night, the two sisters stayed until closing.
No laptops, no reports, no emails.
Just laughter and two cream stews.
Turns out, Jean had quit her job and went to a company that treats their employees better and had a much better benefit for her and her sister, giving her more time to finally make up the lost time with her sister.Ā
From then on, Jean no longer came every day.
Whenever she does visit, she always has stories to tell. Whether it was about movie nights with Barbara, about finally attending one of her performances, about embarrassing herself trying to bake, about weekend shopping trips, about the little moments she had thought she had lost forever.
And every time she spoke of her sister⦠Her eyes shone.
One evening, after finishing her meal, Jean lingered by the counter instead of immediately leaving.
She looked oddly nervous.
"May I ask you something?"
"Of course."
Jean hesitated for a moment.
"...Would you be willing to teach me how to cook cream stew? Barbara and I have been trying, but we can never quite recreate the taste."
She smiled sheepishly.
"And I thought⦠Perhaps I could learn from the expert."
You were quick to say yes.Ā
So on the weekend, when the restaurant was quieter than usual, Jean came by wearing an apron instead of her work uniform.
It was such an unusual sight that you almost didn't recognize her.
"Is something wrong?" She asked.
"N-No⦠It's just strange seeing you without your laptop." You said with a sheepish smile.Ā
Jean laughed softly.
"I left it at home. Barbara made sure of that."
And so the two of you spent the afternoon together in the kitchen.
You taught her how to prepare the vegetables, how long to simmer the broth, and the importance of patience.
Though admittedly⦠Jean wasn't exactly gifted in the culinary arts.
"Miss Jean, thatās milk, not cream."
"Ah⦠Right. My apologies."
Despite her mistakes, Jean looked genuinely happy. Happier than you had ever seen her during those long nights spent working.
Every now and then, she'd excitedly ask questions or proudly present her progress to you.
And before you knew it⦠The afternoon had slipped away.
"How does it taste?" Jean asked nervously.
You took a spoonful.
And smiled.
"Not bad."
Jean blinked.
"Not bad? That's all?"
You laughed.
"For your first attempt, it's excellent."
Jean smiled.
A bright, genuine smile.
One that made her look years younger.
"Thank goodness."
"Barbara will be happy.
And so time flew by as you watched the businesswoman become happier and healthier.Ā
One day during her visit, Jean smiled softly towards you.
"Barbara really liked the cream stew I made yesterday. Iām getting better thanks to you."
She then sheepishly added, āIt's still not as good as yours, though."
She paused for a moment, as though she had something important she wanted to say.
"I've been meaning to thank you."
She said quietly.
"Not just for the meals. Or for taking care of me when I was sick."
Jean lowered her gaze slightly.
"I thought I had already failed as a sister. That perhaps⦠Barbara and I had simply grown too far apart."
A small smile appeared on her face.
"But because of you⦠I remembered the things that mattered, and Ww found our way back to each other."
She let out a soft laugh.
"Barbara says I've become less quiet lately. Though I'm not entirely sure that's a compliment."
Despite her words, she looked happier than ever.
"Still⦠Thank you. Truly. I hope your grandfather gets better soon as well."
One evening, before leaving, Jean stopped in front of the wishing board.
Looking thoughtful, she picked up a pen.
Then, with a gentle smile, she wrote:
"I want to be a better sister."
When she finished, she looked at the board for a while.
Before quietly adding:
"And perhapsā¦"
"A better version of myself as well."
Though she never wrote those words down.
Because deep down, you had already helped her do that.
Unlike Jean and Varka, Hat Guy had quite an entrance.
It happened on one rainy day when the door suddenly slid open harshly, the bell ringing rather in a wrong and hurried way.
When you check on the newcomer, you certainly didn't expect to see a foreign young-looking man with a large hat that's dripping rainwater on the floor, holding a permanent scowl on his face as he quietly curses at the unfortunate weather.
You watched carefully as he sat down on the very end of the counter seat with a huff, removing his wet hat, unsure if he was the type to shout at poor employees.
Before you could greet him and ask for his order, he beat you to it, scanning over the menu pasted on the counter.
"I'll get the most bitter tea you have with a cold cut platter meal."
As you quickly get started on preparing his meal, you try to ignore his quiet curses to himself.
"Great⦠First my men lost that cursed doctor, then it started raining, and now I'm stuck in this stupid town."
So much for first impressions, am I right?
Based on his constant complaints that he "kept to himself," you managed to put two and two together that Hat Guy happened to pass by the neighborhood while trying to find a doctor for reasons only your ancestors can tell, but due to the heavy rain, he had to take a detour and come to your restaurant.
Despite his harsh demeanor, he wasn't exactly harsh to you in a way one would expect an entitled customer to be.
If you could guess, you'd assume he's actually just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
When you served his order, he was already quiet, taking light bites as he continued to put on a nasty look on his face.
He didn't leave any more comments when he was finished either, standing up from his stool and grabbing his now dry hat as he left the bill on the counter, ready to go back to whatever he was doing since the rain finally stopped.
You thought that would've been the last time you'd see the foreigner.
But then he came back the day after tomorrow.
This time, he didn't look as angry and mean as before as he went to his previous spot, scanning the menu once more without another word.
"I'll get the most bitter tea you have and the flaming red bolognese."
It slowly became a routine.
Every twice a week, he comes back to your restaurant ordering different meals with the same bitter drink.
Each time, you felt like you're walking on eggshells due to remembering his nasty attitude during your first encounter, not wanting to deal with any hassling conflicts with any customers as it's the last thing you needed.
Yet despite all his complaints, he somehow never had anything bad to say about your cooking.
Not that he'd ever compliment it.
"The tea's acceptable."
"This one's edible."
"You didn't burn the noodles today."
Which, according to your grandfather, was probably the closest thing to praise coming from someone like him.
Eventually, you stopped being nervous around him.
And perhaps he noticed.
Because he stopped glaring at you whenever you approached his seat.
Sometimes, he'd even push his empty plate forward before you could ask.
"Same drink."
"And surprise me with the meal."
"I don't care."
Which was strange.
Because for someone who kept to himself so much⦠He had somehow entrusted his meals entirely to you.
Though he would deny such a thing if anyone pointed it out.
"Don't misunderstand. I'm just too lazy to read the menu."
And yet, every dish you recommended was always finished completely.
One evening, when you apologized for making him wait longer than usual due to the amount of customers, Hat Guy merely scoffed.
"What are you apologizing for? I'm not in a hurry."
He paused.
"...Besides, I was planning on staying a while."
Somehow, hearing those words made your heart skip a beat.
Not that you'd ever admit that.
What really made you surprised was the time when one of the children accidentally bumped into Hat Guy while playing around, and just when you thought the poor kid was about to get one hell of a lecture and berating comment, you were instead surprised to see Hat Guy checking up on the kid and shooing him away, before going back to his meal as if nothing happened.
Huh, maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
Out of habit, you continue to observe your foreign customer while handling your restaurant around.
Though he often claims that he simply happened to be passing through, it somehow becomes a routine for him to visit every twice a week.
He never orders the same meal twice. But his drink always remains the same.
Sometimes he brings a newspaper.
Sometimes he sits in complete silence.
And sometimes, when there aren't many customers around, he quietly listens to the conversations of the elderly residents while pretending not to.
Oddly enough, he no longer scans the menu and actually knows all your meals by heart.
Even stranger, he always visits during the busiest hours despite how much he complains about noisy places.
He never joins any conversations, but he never leaves early either.
In fact, you've noticed that after finishing his meals, he often stays behind with his tea.
Watching the rain outside.
Listening to the grandmothers gossip.
Listening to the children giggling and playing around.
Listening to you talk with the regular customers.
And every now and then, you catch him looking at you.
Only for him to immediately avert his eyes with a click of his tongue.
"...Watch where you're walking."
"You'll trip."
Orā
"The soup's boiling over."
Orā
"You missed a spot."
He always notices.
Somehow, he notices everything.
Huh.
Maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
One particularly quiet evening, you accidentally cut your finger while preparing ingredients.
Before you could even react, Hat Guy was already standing up, leaning towards the counter to check up on you.Ā
"Idiot."
His voice was sharper than usual. "How are you this careless?"
You blinked in surprise.
"...Hat Guy?"
He looked equally surprised himself, as if he hadn't realized he had gotten up.
"...Tch."
"You were getting blood everywhere, you might mess up my order."
Despite his complaints, he stayed beside you until the bandage was wrapped properly.
Only then did he return to his seat, ears slightly red as he hides his face with his hat.
"...Don't misunderstand. It would've been annoying if you got sick."
You couldn't stop smiling to yourself for the rest of the evening.
Before long, the regulars become used to his presence.
Though nobody knew his name, the children eventually started calling him "Hat Guy."
Much to his annoyance.
"I'm not answering to that."
"Good evening, Mister Hat Guy!"
"...Brats."
And yet for some reason, he always carries little candies in his pockets, and the neighborhood cats seem to adore him for some reason.
"Don't get the wrong idea. I just happened to have leftovers." He said, crossing his arms when he realized you were watching him after you took out the trash.Ā
Huh.
Maybe he really is just a reasonable man with a sour attitude.
One afternoon, while helping one of the regular customers cross the road from the restaurant, you noticed Miss Nahida sitting outside her home.
The oldest resident of the neighborhood who used to be a very beloved teacher in the school thatās located in the neighborhood.
Though age had weakened her body and memory, she remained beloved by everyone. Even your grandfather, who always has something to say about people, had nothing but respect for the elderly woman.
Some days she remembered your name.
Other days she mistook you for one of her old students.
Without fail, she always remembered to smile.
"Good afternoon, dear."
"Have you seen my grandson?"
You blinked.
"Your grandson?"
"Kuni."
She smiled warmly.
"Such a sweet boy. He's been away for work. But he promised to visit me soon."
"He promised."
Varka, who happened to be nearby, simply sighed.
And when Nahida wasn't listening anymore, he quietly explained.
"That promise was made years ago. He left after high school and never looked back."
Your heart sank.
According to Varka, Nahida had found an abandoned baby left outside her doorstep decades ago.
Nobody knew who the parents were, and nobody ever came looking for him.Ā
So she simply brought the child inside and raised him herself.
"His name's Kunikuzushi."
Varka smiled softly.
"Though she always called him Kuni. Based on what the grannies told me, he had always looked up to her more than anything. But then he grew up. Said he wanted something bigger than this little neighborhood.Ā
Varka then sighed. āAnd one day, he left. Nobody knows what he does, and nobody's heard from him since. Not even Miss Nahida. I remember granny telling me about how devastating it was to see their favorite teacher looking so hopeful yet sad when each year flew by without him visiting."
For some reason, your thoughts immediately drifted towards Hat Guy. Though you quickly dismissed the idea.
Surely not.
Right?
Yet the coincidence kept bothering you, especially when you often see him either lingering or staring in the direction of Miss Nahidaās home.Ā
And one evening, after watching Hat Guy stare absentmindedly out the window towards Miss Nahida's house, you finally asked.
"Do you know Miss Nahida?"
The spoon in his hand stopped.
For a moment, he said nothing.
Thenā
"...Who?"
It was far too quick, far too rehearsed. He didnāt even look you in the eyes.
And thatās when you had your answer.
After that, you started noticing strange things.
Every morning, someone leaves fresh flowers by Nahida's doorstep, someone fixes the broken fence before Varka could, and someone leaves groceries outside whenever she forgets to buy them.
And not one single person knows who did it.
Except one rainy morning, when you accidentally caught Hat Guy holding grocery bags outside her house.
Upon seeing you, he clicked his tongue.
"Don't misunderstand. I just happened to be passing by."
You raised an eyebrow, unsure what to think. "Passing by with groceries?"
"...Shut up."
Despite all that, he never bothered to knock nor call her outside.Ā
And as the months passed, his questions slowly became stranger.
"...Tell me." He hesitated for a moment, holding his tea and blowing the steam off.Ā
"If someone wasted years of their life doing stupid things⦠Would it even matter if they came back?"
Another time, he quietly asked: "What if they've done things they can never take back?"
And another time: "What if they're afraid?"Ā
And every time, you always answer each question reassuringly, knowing that he wasnāt talking about someone else.
Then one day, you found yourself asking Hat Guy a question when he came to visit.
"Why won't you talk to her?"
His expression darkened.
Instead of denying yet again about not knowing who youāre talking about, he dropped the act. "...What's the point? She forgets everything."
"Maybe.ā You replied softly. āBut she remembers waiting for you."
For the first time since you've met himā¦
He said nothing.
He simply stared into his tea, then quietly paid the bill and left.
And for nearly two weeksā¦
He never returned.
You honestly thought that would be the last time you would see him.
Until one evening, the bell rang.
And there he was.
Though something about him seemed different. Quieter. Softer. As though a burden had been lifted from his shoulders.
After finishing his meal, he suddenly spoke.
"...She remembered."
When you look up at him in surprise, he continues speaking. "Not everything though, but she remembered me."
He laughed weakly.
"...Stupid old woman. She asked why I took so long. Then she forgot and asked who I was.āĀ
Despite the insults, you noticed how suspiciously red his eyes were.
"Did you answer her?"
"...Yeah. I did."
After that night, Hat Guy began visiting more frequently. He looked relaxed a little more. Though his questions never seemed to stop.
"...If someone wanted to leave everything behind to start over⦠Would running away make them a coward?"
You thought about it for a moment.
Then smiled.
"Not if they're running towards a better future."
He stared at you.Ā
"...I see."
Sure enough, after finishing his meal, he stood up. Putting the money on the counter, he adjusted his hat.
Then, with a strange look in his eyes, he quietly said:
"Thanks.. for everything.ā
And then he left.
You never saw him again after that.Ā
Strangely enough, Miss Nahida smiles more these days.
"Kuni visited me the other day. He was such a good boy, he asked if I wanted to go with him to a far away place for a fresh start.ā She said to you one day.Ā
Your eyes widen in surprise. āAnd did you say yes, Miss Nahida?ā You asked.Ā
She shook her head, laughing softly. āNo, of course not. Iām too old to travel, and I think itāll do him good to go out there without worrying about me. But he did promise he'll come back again when the time comes."
And though sometimes she forgets his name, the conversation, and even his identity,Ā
She never forgets that he came home.
And one evening, while cleaning the restaurant after closing time, you noticed a new wish hanging on the board.
You don't recall seeing any customers putting it there.
Yet the elegant handwriting gave you an inkling feeling that you already know who it came from. .Ā
Written in small, neat letters were the words:
"Thank you for everything."
No name.
No explanation.
But you understood, a sad smile forming on your face.
Wherever Hat Guy had goneā
You could only hope that, this timeā¦
He was finally running towards happiness.
The first person you met when you first arrived at the neighborhood is none other than your grandfather's physician.
You had only just finished listening to your grandfather's instructions on how to manage his restaurant when the bell above the restaurant door chimed.
Turning around, you expected a customer.
Instead, a tall man dressed in a doctor's uniform stepped inside with a smile on his face.
"Good morning." He greeted, his voice gentle, calm and pleasant to listen to. "I'm here for your check-up."
Before you could even react, your grandfather groaned from the kitchen.
"Youāre here already?"
The doctor chuckled. "Goodness, what a cruel thing to say to your physician."
"Bah. You're only here to nag me."
Nonetheless, the doctor smiled more. "Because you refuse to listen."
As you listen to their conversation, the two of them sounded less like doctor and patient, and more like old friends.
That was your first impression of Doctor Baizhu.
To the neighborhood, Baizhu is a wonderful doctor who has the most effective medicine there is, with the price of having to suffer from the extreme bitterness of said medicine. To your grandfather, he's a nuisance who constantly reminded him to rest and not work his bum off to run the restaurant.To the children, he was the terrifying man responsible for making them drink awful syrup. Though they still adored him, finding him ācoolā for having a snake in his home. To the elderly residents, he was the kind young doctor who patiently listened to their complaints even when they repeated the same stories over and over again. To the shopkeepers, he was someone who always remembered to ask how their families were doing.
To everyone elseā¦
Doctor Baizhu was simply Doctor Baizhu.
Someone reliable, kind, and always seemed to have a smile on his face.
Knowing how stubborn your grandfather is during his morning check-ups, you couldn't help but feel bad for the doctor and offer Baizhu to eat at the restaurant every time he checks up on your grandfather, to which the doctor always appreciated and kindly accepted your offer.
"Are you certain?" He asks.Ā
You nodded reassuringly. "Of course! Itās the least I can do as thanks for putting up with the old man."
At that, he laughed softly. "Then I shall gratefully accept."
He then became some of the customers that come in the morning given that's the time he visits your grandfather, so he got to experience the peaceful atmosphere of the restaurant that only occurs at this hour.
The sunlight filtering through the windows, the quiet chatter of regular customers, the smell of freshly baked bread, and the sound of dishes clinking together was peaceful and comfortable, enough to make any tension come off.
And in your opinion, Doctor Baizhu fit perfectly into that atmosphere.
His order is usually a crab, ham, and veggie bake with tea on the side, and he prefers sitting by the wall near your kitchen where he has alone time and can call you when he needs something.
He always thanked you whenever you brought his food without fail.
"Thank you. This smells wonderful."
Even if it was something simple as merely refilling his tea, you couldnāt help but feel something warm in your stomach from his gratitude.Ā
Doctor Baizhu always made people feel appreciated.
Most of the customers who came by would notice him and greet him, to which he greeted back with a polite smile on his face, often asking them about their well-being and whether they had taken care of themselves better despite the fact that some of them were no longer under his care.
"Good morning, Mrs. Faruzan. Remember to take your medicine after breakfast."
"Mr. Cyrus, please don't strain your back again."
"Ah, Varka. Have you been drinking too much lately?"
Which earned a loud protest from the neighborhood leader. "Doctor! Don't expose me in public!"
Baizhu laughed. "My apologies. Professional habit."Ā
It was clear to you that everybody loved Doctor Baizhu.
Though admittedly⦠They couldnāt say the same to his medicine.Ā
"Bah! Why does this blasted thing taste worse every day?" Your grandfather grimaced after swallowing his daily medicine.
"Because you complain about it every day." Baizhu replied with a patient smile.
"It's bitter!"
"It's medicine."
"Can't you make it taste like tea or something?"
"I could, but then you'd complain that it doesn't work."
"Hmph. Still tastes awful."
"And yet you drank it without fuss today."
"Don't get smug, doctor."
You'd often hear him laugh softly whenever that happened.
A gentle laugh.
One that made the peaceful mornings feel even warmer.
You've come to like Baizhu. A lot.
Which is why it didn't take long for you to notice something about the doctor.
Every time he eats his meal, his hand often trembles, as if struggling to lift the spoon up to his lips.
But he never lets it be known to the whole world, not when he often stops using his utensils right away whenever someone comes to greet him.
He's always seen smiling, always composed, always elegant. And yet⦠His smile made it easy to overlook the exhaustion beneath his eyes.
When you decide to ask your grandfather about Baizhu after he left, your grandfather sighs.
"Ah, Dr. Baizhu's physical condition is far from perfect. Truth be told, I don't know how he even manages to keep up with his work. That fool should be the one lying on the bed instead of me."
You blinked.
"Doctor Baizhu is sick?"
"Always has been." Your grandfather huffed. "He's got that pharmacy of his to manage, patients to look after, and his assistant Gui running around like a headless chicken."
He sighed. "Even so, he still insists on making house calls. He never says no and never complains, especially when it comes to the children and people at my age⦠even when he's coughing his lungs out."
He then crossed his arm, displeased. "Bah. Doctors make terrible patients."
Your heart sank.
Ever since then, you begin paying more attention to him.
You notice how he often excuses himself to cough in private, how he occasionally loses his appetite, how his tea always turns cold because he spends more time checking on others than himself, how he quietly massages his wrists whenever they ache, andā¦
How he simply closes his eyes for a few moments before putting on his smile again.
Whenever you ask him how he's feeling, he simply smiles.
"I'm alright. Please don't worry too much about me."
Though the shadows beneath his eyes only seem to deepen.
One morning, while you were cleaning the tables, Baizhu suddenly collapsed.
Thankfully, it wasn't severe, but seeing the neighborhood's beloved doctor unconscious for the first time deeply worried everyone.
Especially you.
By the time he woke up, he was already embarrassed.
"My, this is rather humiliating."
You checked up on his condition, worried for your friend. "Doctor Baizhu. You scared everyone."
He simply laughed softly.
"My apologies. I suppose my body wanted a break."
Yet despite his lightheartedness, you couldn't bring yourself to feel assured that heās alright.
And for the first time since you've known him, Baizhu noticed the tears in your eyes.
His smile faltered. "...Oh dear. Please don't cry. I assure you, I'm quite difficult to get rid of."
That only made your chest hurt even more.
After that day, you became more stubborn.
You prepared lighter meals for him, made sure his tea stayed warm, scolded him whenever he skipped meals.
And before long, the regular customers joined in too.
Varka often helped Baizhu carry his medicine supplies, some of the children reminded him to rest, and your grandfather grumbled at him every chance he got.
Somehow, the entire neighborhood had begun taking care of its doctor.
Much to Baizhu's amusement.
"Goodness. I've become everyone's patient."
One peaceful morning, after the other customers had left, Baizhu quietly asked: "May I ask you something?"
You were quick to lend an ear. "Of course."
He looked towards the window, his eyes softening.Ā
"...Do you think it's selfish to wish for more time?"
Your hands stopped.
"More time?"
Baizhu smiled weakly.
"Mm. More time to work and to help others."
Then, after a brief pauseā
"...And to stay beside those precious to me."
Somehowā¦
Your face grew warm.
And Baizhu chuckled softly upon noticing. "My apologies. Perhaps that was too embarrassing."
"Not at all." You replied quietly. "I think it's only human of us to always wish for more time."
He looked genuinely surprised by your answer.Ā
From then on, Baizhu begins lingering after meals.Ā
Sometimes he stays in the restaurant more to keep you company in the lonely mornings. Sometimes he reads a book beside the counter. Or sometimes, if he feels bold, he simply watches you cook.
And every now and then, you'd catch him smiling to himself. His smile this time was fond and sincere.Ā
One that made your heart skip a beat.
While Baizhu was on his way to the restaurant in the morning, some of the children in the neighborhood were quick to follow him, still in their school uniforms as theyāre on their way to their school.
Ā "Doctor Baizhu?" One kid spoke up.Ā
"Hm?"
"What are you thinking about thatās making you smile so wide?"
He blinked, then laughed quietly.
"Ah. Was I?"
He thoughtfully tried to come up with an answer. But deep down, he already knew the reason behind it.
āI suppose itās a good day today.āĀ
One morning, as you walked with Baizhu to see him off and return to the pharmacy near the exit, Baizhu stopped in front of the wishing board.
He stood there for a long time. Longer than anyone else.
āMy, how cute.ā He commented.Ā
Then, with a gentle smile, he wrote: "I wish everyone a long and healthy life."
You smiled.
"That's a very Doctor Baizhu answer."
He laughed softly. "Old habits die hard, I'm afraid."
Then, after a moment, his gaze drifted towards you.
Warm.
Tender.
Almost wistful.
"Though⦠If I may be selfish just this onceā¦"
He smiled.
"I hope I get to enjoy many more meals with you."
And despite the weakness that remained in his body, the uncertainty of tomorrow., and knowing that life could never promise him forever.
Doctor Baizhu still smiled ever so brightly.
Because for the first time in a long while, he had found something precious enough to look forward to tomorrow.
And for now.... That was enough.Ā
You remembered Zhongli from back when you still lived in the neighborhood.
Back when your world was much smaller, when your biggest worries consisted of unfinished homework and whether your grandfather would catch the two of you sneaking snacks from the kitchen.
He was the son of an elderly woman whom your grandparents were very close with.
And because the adults spent so much time together, their children naturally did as well.
You met him when you were young, far younger than either of you could remember.
Neither of you could really recall when exactly your friendship began, but you knew it simply existed. As naturally as breathing and as naturally as the sun rising every morning.
Since then, the two of you had been inseparable.If people saw you, Zhongli was usually nearby. And if they saw Zhongli, you certainly weren't far behind.
You grew up together, went to the same schools, shared lunches, studied together, walked home together, celebrated birthdays together, cried together, laughed together.
And before either of you realized itā¦
Childhood became adolescence.
And adolescence became high school.
Everyone around you simply assumed that one day, the two of you would get married.
Even your grandfather loved teasing the both of you.
"Oi, Zhongli."
"When are you taking my grandchild away, hm?"
Which only resulted in Zhongli smiling politely while you nearly died of embarrassment.
"Grandpa! Please don't tease him." You complained to your grandfather.Ā
Yet Zhongli always answered so calmly, so composed, and so so so dignified. āItās alright.āĀ
Yet despite his collected demeanor, the tips of his ears would always turn red.
Which only made your grandfather laugh harder.
"Look at him!"
"Grandpa!"
You wanted the ground to swallow you whole.
Meanwhile, Zhongli merely coughed into his hand, looking everywhere except at you.
And despite your embarrassment, you secretly thought he looked adorable.
Itās safe to say that Zhongli was your first friend, your first crush, and your first love.
The person who knew you better than anyone else.
And perhapsā¦
Your greatest regret.
Which was why it hurt so much when your parents announced that you would be moving to the city.
You still remembered that evening.
The two of you sat inside the restaurant after closing hours, the lights were dim, the streets outside were quiet, and for the first time in your lifeā¦
You didn't know what to say to him.
Because how were you supposed to tell the person who had always been by your side that you were leaving?
You remembered crying, struggling to get the words out, and how Zhongli was quietly listening.
As he always did.
And what hurt the most was that he never once made things difficult for you. He never once complained, nor even asked you to stay.
Even though you knew that deep down, he didn't want you to go.
"...It's alright." He smiled softly. "We'll still call each other."
"And besides⦠You'll visit when you grow older right?āĀ
You smiled through your tears.
"Of course. I'll come back all the time. Nothing's going to change."
Such naive promises, such foolish confidence.
Because life had a cruel habit of getting in the way.
One year became three.
Three became five.
Calls became texts.
Texts became occasional greetings.
Occasional greetings became birthdays.
Birthdays became silence.
Yet neither of you forgot.
You couldn't.
Because Zhongli has always been your person.
And you had always been his.
Which was why, when the bell above the restaurant door rang during the final hour of the evening⦠You never expected to see him.
Of all people.
Zhongli.
Standing there.
Looking exactly as you remembered.
Handsome.
Elegant.
Timeless.
His expression softened upon seeing you, and he smiled. The same smile that had accompanied nearly every memory of your youth.
"...I hope I'm not too late."
Your breath caught.
For a moment, you thought you were dreaming. Yet there he was walking toward the counter, pulling out a stool, and sitting down with all the familiarity in the world.
As though no time had passed at all.
You swallowed the lump in your throat and smiled.
"No⦠Not at all. The usual?"
And unlike everyone else, Zhongli only ever ordered tea.
Just tea.
Nothing more.
And every evening after thatā¦
He would arrive during the last hour, without fail.
The first thing he always asked was: "How was your day?"
And you found yourself telling him everything, about the customers, the regulars, your worries, your frustrations, and the little things that made you smile.
And Zhongli listened. He always listened, looking genuinely happy just hearing your voice.
Just like before.
Which only made your chest ache.
Because regret still lingered. You regret for the years lost, for the distance, and for all the things left unsaid.
Of course, Zhongli noticed.Ā
He always noticed.
He placed his tea down and hummed softly. "That was a long time ago." He spoke softly, looking at you.Ā
"Please do not beat yourself up over it." His voice remained warm, gentle, and familiar.
"Would it make you feel better if you take a break and enjoy this tea with me?"
And no matter how exhausting your day had been, no matter how tired you feltā¦
You always found yourself sitting beside him.
Just like old times.
Sometimes the two of you reminisced about high school, you complained about city life, you laughed until your stomach hurt.
And sometimes⦠Zhongli simply listened.
Just as he always had.
Every time you apologized for losing touch, Zhongli only smiled.
"You always apologize, yet I never once blamed you."
And those words⦠those kind gentle wordsā¦Ā
Only made your heart ache even more.
His visits continued as you managed the restaurant, to the point where it became a precious routine that you found yourself looking forward to every day.
Because seeing him again made you happier than you'd been in years.
Before long, the final hour became your favorite part of the day.
Because it meant seeing Zhongli and reliving your childhood all over again.
One evening, while laughing over an embarrassing memory from high school, Zhongli suddenly asked:
"...Do you regret anything?"
You paused.
"...A lot."
"Such as?"
You looked away from him for a moment, your smile disappearing. "...Leaving⦠and not being here."Ā Ā
Zhongli quietly listened.
As he always did.
Then he smiled gently. "Life simply happened. There's no shame in that."
Yet, his smile seemed sadder than usual.Ā
Truth be told, it pained him to see you constantly beat yourself up for what happened. He wanted you to truly be happy.Ā
Then one evening⦠He didn't come, nor the day after, nor the week after that.
You found yourself staring at the clock, constantly waiting for the bell.
But it never rang.
After a month had passed, your grandfather had finally recovered enough to leave his room and help around the restaurant again, feeling better than ever thanks to Baizhuās miracle work and his perseverance.
Excited, you found yourself glancing at the clock, waiting once again for Zhongli to come.
You wanted to tell Zhongli the good news.
You wanted to tell him that Grandpa had recovered.
You wanted to tell him how happy you were.
You wantedā¦
To see him.
As the final hour approached, your grandfather noticed your constant glances toward the door as he was wiping the counter.
"...Waiting for someone?" He asked gruffly.Ā
You smiled softly. "...Not really.āĀ
You hesitated for a moment, sighing softly as you looked down.Ā
ā...I just suddenly missed Zhongli."
Your grandfather paused, then smiled sadly.
"...Me too, kid."
Silence settled between the two of you.
A quiet, familiar silence.
The kind Zhongli himself would've appreciated.
Looking at the empty stool opposite yours, your chest started to hurt.
Because you already knew.
Heās never coming back at all.Ā
ā...His death anniversary is coming next week.ā You spoke sadly, voice suddenly hoarse.Ā
You had known ever since you returned to your hometown, ever since you stood before his mother in his home, and ever since you learned that the boy you'd loved all your life had quietly left this world while you were away.
And still, you find yourself waiting.
Listening for the bell, hoping, wishing that he comes at the last hour to talk to you.
But the bell never rang.
That night, after closing the restaurant, you quietly excused yourself.
And for the first time since returning homeā¦
You visited him.
The moon hung high above as you stood before the gravestone that held his name, his dates, and the proof that this wasn't some terrible nightmare.
It was real.
He was gone.
Everything you had been holding back came crashing down.
The missed calls, the messages you promised to answer later before drowning from work, the news from old neighbors you were too busy to read, the funeral you arrived too late for, and the flowers.
You remembered seeing his mother crying when you entered his home, only to learn from the elderly woman that he had been battling cancer for years and that he had hidden it from everyone.
It pained you that just when you were able to finally visit him after so long, it was already over.
You collapsed before his grave, letting out shaky breaths as you sobbed.
"I'm sorryā¦"
"I'm sorry I wasn't there."
"I'm sorry I came too late."
"I'm sorryā¦"
"I'm sorryā¦"
The words became sobs.
You didnāt know how long youāve been kneeling in front of his grave, the grass prickling your legs as you continued to cry in grief and regret.Ā
You missed him so so so much.
You wanted to tell him so many things.
And before you knew it, exhaustion overtook you as you fell asleep, curled up in front of his gravestone.Ā Ā
And in your dreams, you finally saw him.
Zhongli.
He was sitting across from you with a cup of tea in his hands.
Smiling just as he always had. He was no longer the Zhongli consumed by illness, or the Zhongli that haunted your memories.
Right in front of you was Zhongli.
Your Zhongli.
You broke down immediately.
"I'm sorry,ā You gasped. āI'm sorry I wasn't there! You must've been scared, you must've been lonely, a-and Iā"
"It's alright." He interrupted softly.
You sobbed even more. "...But it isn't! I left, I lost touch, a-and when I finally came backā"
"Life happened." Zhongli smiled gently. "There's no shame in that."
Tears blurred your vision.
"But I missed so much." You shakily replied.Ā
He nodded. "Mm. But we had many wonderful years together, didn't we?"
You cried even more as he continued to talk, ā...And those memories made me very happy."
He sounded so happy, it ate you alive.Ā
"Zhongli⦠Werenāt you angry at me?" You asked brokenly.Ā
He blinked.
Then chuckled softly. āAngry? At you?" His eyes curved warmly. "Never."
"You always apologize, and I never once blamed you. You know this was something thatās out of our hands."
Those words only made you cry harder.
"I loved you."
The confession escaped your lips before you could stop it.
Zhongli froze.
His smile then returned. "...I know."
"...And I loved you too."
Your breath caught.
There was no regret in his eyes, only warmth and peace.
As he finished his tea, he placed the empty cup down.Ā
"...Thank you. For remembering me, for coming home, and for allowing me to say goodbye."
Tears wouldn't stop falling, yet you smiled.
Zhongli had always known how to comfort you.
Just as he always had, and just as he always would.
"...Will I ever see you again?" You whispered.
Zhongli merely smiled.
And with the same tenderness he'd shown you since childhood, he answered: "Perhaps when the time comes. But not yet."
He then placed a hand on top of yours. "You still have much to see, so many people to meet and befriendā¦ā
ā...So please⦠live well for both of us.ā
The world around you slowly faded.
And by the time you opened your eyes⦠morning had come.
You were still beside his grave alone.
Yet the loneliness didn't hurt as much.
Because for the first time since his passingā¦
Your heart no longer carried regret alone, but instead gratitude.
ā...Thank you, Zhongli.ā You whispered, sitting up from the cold ground and caressed his gravestone. āIāll live for the both of us.ā
And so, you returned to the restaurant.Ā
One week later, his death anniversary arrived.Ā
Your grandfather decided to throw a special party at the restaurant just for him as everyone that you knew came and celebrated in his name.Ā Ā
As you watched the party going on, you decided to finally try out the wishing board and write your own wish.Ā
Tears filled your eyes once more as you pasted the paper on the board.Ā
Despite your tears, you smiled, knowing that Zhongli can finally move on alongside you.