i donāt owe anyone an explanation but i havenāt been on because there was a death in my family. i havenāt abandoned by blog.

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@vampyrshield
i donāt owe anyone an explanation but i havenāt been on because there was a death in my family. i havenāt abandoned by blog.

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vampyrshieldā:
justĀ aĀ headsĀ upĀ thatĀ thisĀ blogĀ isĀ goingĀ toĀ beĀ extremelyĀ privateĀ withĀ veryĀ selectiveĀ interactions.Ā iāmĀ notĀ hereĀ toĀ gainĀ followers,Ā iāmĀ hereĀ toĀ takeĀ bellaĀ fromĀ smeyerāsĀ clappedĀ hands.Ā ohĀ andĀ iāllĀ beĀ exclusiveĀ withĀ meĀ wifeĀ Ā @televampyrĀ !!Ā
this is still accurate but now weāve roped @demivampyrā in uwu
THE COVENS in The Twilight Saga

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RENESMEE.
Ā @vampyrshieldā from (x) :Ā ā nightmare : Ā myĀ Ā yourĀ muse Ā coming Ā to Ā yourĀ myĀ muses Ā aid Ā when Ā they Ā awake Ā from Ā a Ā nightmare. ā
searingĀ heatĀ ragedĀ aĀ warĀ ofĀ fireĀ &Ā ashesĀ inĀ herĀ throat,Ā aĀ starkĀ contrastĀ toĀ theĀ sharpĀ stingĀ ofĀ frozenĀ knivesĀ thatĀ piercedĀ herĀ limbs.Ā theĀ pain,Ā nearlyĀ impossibleĀ toĀ endure,Ā reachedĀ aĀ crestĀ beforeĀ theĀ waveĀ crashedĀ intoĀ her,Ā theĀ currentĀ draggingĀ herĀ flailingĀ formĀ intoĀ theĀ darkĀ depthsĀ ofĀ theĀ sea.Ā itĀ wasnātĀ untilĀ sheĀ wasĀ jarredĀ awakeĀ thatĀ renesmeeĀ realizedĀ theĀ frozenĀ knivesĀ wereĀ actuallyĀ theĀ handsĀ ofĀ herĀ motherĀ securingĀ herĀ fragileĀ formĀ toĀ theĀ bedĀ asĀ herĀ haphazardĀ appendagesĀ trashedĀ atĀ theĀ duvetĀ &Ā theĀ burningĀ inĀ herĀ throatĀ wasĀ fromĀ theĀ ear-splittingĀ screamsĀ thatĀ echoedĀ fromĀ herĀ chest.Ā tearsĀ streamedĀ downĀ herĀ cheeks,Ā saltyĀ swarmsĀ minglingĀ withĀ theĀ sweatĀ thatĀ seeminglyĀ coatedĀ everyĀ inchĀ ofĀ herĀ flesh.Ā asĀ herĀ bodyĀ stilledĀ &Ā theĀ howlsĀ subsided,Ā theĀ hybridĀ wasĀ leftĀ shakingĀ &Ā sobbingĀ againstĀ herĀ motherāsĀ form.Ā incomprehensibleĀ soundsĀ tumbledĀ fromĀ herĀ partedĀ lips,Ā driedĀ &Ā crackedĀ fromĀ theĀ screams,Ā beforeĀ sheĀ managedĀ anĀ intelligibleĀ response.Ā herĀ gaze,Ā mistedĀ overĀ fromĀ theĀ tearsĀ thatĀ couldnātĀ escape,Ā remainedĀ wideĀ &Ā fearfulĀ likeĀ aĀ babyĀ rabbitĀ pinnedĀ byĀ aĀ feralĀ fox.Ā āĀ please be you this time.Ā Ā ā
itĀ tookĀ lessĀ thanĀ threeĀ secondsĀ forĀ bellaĀ toĀ beĀ atĀ herĀ daughterāsĀ bedside,Ā couchedĀ onĀ herĀ kneesĀ nextĀ toĀ her,Ā tryingĀ desperatelyĀ toĀ shakeĀ herĀ awake.Ā Ā Ā whenĀ renesmeeĀ slept,Ā bellaĀ wasĀ neverĀ tooĀ farĀ away.Ā Ā Ā thoughĀ sheĀ appearedĀ toĀ beĀ aĀ womanĀ grown,Ā sheĀ wasĀ neverthelessĀ extremelyĀ protective.Ā Ā Ā afterĀ all,Ā itĀ wasĀ notĀ incrediblyĀ longĀ agoĀ thatĀ sheĀ thoughtĀ sheādĀ neverĀ seeĀ herĀ childĀ everĀ again.Ā Ā
ā shh,Ā shh . . . āĀ Ā Ā bellaĀ triedĀ toĀ sootheĀ her,Ā movingĀ toĀ crawlĀ intoĀ bedĀ nextĀ toĀ herĀ andĀ bringĀ herĀ intoĀ herĀ arms.Ā Ā Ā sheĀ couldĀ stillĀ recallĀ theĀ nightĀ terrorsĀ thatĀ wouldĀ disturbĀ herĀ sleep,Ā oftenĀ makingĀ herĀ wakeĀ inĀ aĀ coldĀ sweat,Ā heartĀ poundingĀ rapidly.Ā Ā Ā inĀ thatĀ way,Ā sheĀ couldĀ empathizeĀ withĀ renesmee.Ā Ā ā itāsĀ me,Ā itāsĀ eomma.Ā Ā youāreĀ safe. āĀ sheĀ murmuredĀ quietly,Ā rockingĀ nessĀ backĀ andĀ forth.Ā Ā ā whatĀ happened? ā
RENESMEE.Ā
a soft & cute starter for @vampyrshieldā
the soft overtures of a tell-tale heart, beating to the rhythm of the sweet melody of a bright & earnest love
theĀ harshnessĀ ofĀ theĀ artificialĀ fluorescenceĀ ofĀ theĀ airportĀ lightingĀ mingledĀ bleaklyĀ withĀ theĀ acridĀ aromaĀ ofĀ jetĀ fuelĀ &Ā perspiringĀ humanĀ bodiesĀ asĀ theyĀ shuffledĀ fromĀ oneĀ destinationĀ toĀ another.Ā Ā yet,Ā theĀ dhampirĀ wasĀ aloftĀ withĀ jubilation,Ā everyĀ fiberĀ ofĀ herĀ beingĀ abuzz.Ā sheĀ hadĀ finishedĀ herĀ thirdĀ fallĀ atĀ swarthmoreĀ collegeĀ withĀ immaculateĀ grades,Ā optingĀ toĀ completeĀ aĀ studyĀ abroadĀ semesterĀ duringĀ theĀ springĀ researchingĀ theĀ potentialĀ forĀ enhancedĀ stemĀ cellĀ regenerationĀ forĀ potentialĀ transplants.Ā halfĀ ofĀ herĀ semesterĀ wasĀ spentĀ atĀ theĀ instituteĀ inĀ bostonĀ learningĀ theĀ techniquesĀ forĀ decellularizationĀ &Ā theĀ otherĀ inĀ Ā theĀ universityĀ ofĀ kyotoĀ optimizingĀ theĀ techniquesĀ forĀ developingĀ specifiedĀ cellsĀ fromĀ stemĀ cells.Ā theĀ workĀ wasĀ incrediblyĀ interestingĀ &Ā overwhelminglyĀ timeĀ consuming,Ā whichĀ meantĀ sheĀ didnātĀ haveĀ theĀ opportunityĀ toĀ returnĀ homeĀ forĀ springĀ break.Ā studyingĀ fromĀ januaryĀ untilĀ mid-mayĀ markedĀ theĀ longestĀ timeĀ sheĀ hadĀ spentĀ awayĀ fromĀ homeĀ withoutĀ soĀ muchĀ asĀ aĀ visit.Ā theĀ timeĀ awayĀ wasĀ welcomed,Ā Ā howeverĀ withĀ eachĀ passingĀ mileĀ asĀ herĀ journeyĀ homeĀ commenced,Ā sheĀ grewĀ restless,Ā elatedĀ atĀ theĀ prospectĀ ofĀ seeingĀ herĀ familyĀ onceĀ more.Ā
asĀ herĀ planeĀ landed,Ā itĀ tookĀ allĀ ofĀ herĀ waningĀ selfĀ controlĀ toĀ moveĀ atĀ aĀ sluggish,Ā jet-laggedĀ humanĀ pace.Ā sheĀ shotĀ aĀ textĀ toĀ theĀ familialĀ groupĀ chatĀ toĀ letĀ themĀ knowĀ ofĀ herĀ safeĀ arrival- asĀ ifĀ aliceĀ didnātĀ alreadyĀ alertĀ them.Ā she managedĀ toĀ collectĀ herĀ belongingsĀ fromĀ theĀ baggageĀ trolleyĀ withoutĀ muchĀ delayĀ beforeĀ fightingĀ backĀ theĀ urgeĀ toĀ vampireĀ sprintĀ outĀ ofĀ theĀ crowdĀ towardsĀ herĀ awaitingĀ ride.Ā whenĀ sheĀ finallyĀ madeĀ itĀ toĀ theĀ lobby,Ā familiarĀ scentsĀ &Ā voicesĀ leadĀ herĀ throughĀ theĀ bedlamĀ ofĀ theĀ crowdedĀ airport.Ā ofĀ course,Ā herĀ motherĀ wasĀ theĀ firstĀ oneĀ toĀ greetĀ her.Ā āĀ eomma!Ā āĀ she called,Ā knowingĀ thatĀ despiteĀ herĀ quietĀ voiceāsĀ inabilityĀ toĀ carryĀ overĀ theĀ chaosĀ ofĀ theĀ crowd,Ā herĀ familyĀ wouldĀ beĀ moreĀ thanĀ capableĀ ofĀ hearingĀ her.Ā pushingĀ herĀ wayĀ throughĀ theĀ massesĀ asĀ gentlyĀ asĀ sheĀ couldĀ manage,Ā herĀ bagsĀ droppedĀ atĀ Ā herĀ feetĀ asĀ sheĀ flungĀ herselfĀ intoĀ herĀ motherāsĀ embrace.
bellaāsĀ strongĀ distasteĀ forĀ airportsĀ wasĀ notĀ soĀ muchĀ aĀ newĀ developmentĀ inĀ herĀ secondĀ lifeĀ butĀ itĀ wasĀ certainlyĀ heightenedĀ dueĀ toĀ justĀ howĀ muchĀ moreĀ sheĀ couldĀ hear,Ā smell,Ā andĀ see.Ā Ā Ā itĀ didĀ notĀ seemĀ fittingĀ toĀ justĀ pickĀ upĀ herĀ daughterĀ onĀ theĀ curb;Ā aĀ quickĀ hug,Ā putĀ theĀ luggageĀ inĀ theĀ back,Ā andĀ driveĀ offĀ beforeĀ someĀ highĀ andĀ mightyĀ airportĀ securityĀ barksĀ atĀ themĀ toĀ moveĀ along.Ā Ā Ā no,Ā sheĀ decidedĀ toĀ parkĀ theĀ carĀ andĀ waitĀ withĀ everyoneĀ else.Ā herĀ husbandĀ mightāveĀ preferredĀ valet.Ā ā theyĀ couldĀ easilyĀ affordĀ it, āĀ sheĀ couldĀ stillĀ hearĀ himĀ say.Ā Ā Ā butĀ evenĀ withĀ anĀ eternityĀ ofĀ timeĀ onĀ theirĀ shoulders,Ā sheĀ didnātĀ muchĀ careĀ forĀ waitingĀ aroundĀ idlyĀ forĀ theĀ valetĀ driversĀ toĀ bringĀ theirĀ carĀ backĀ around.Ā Ā Ā soĀ theyĀ parkedĀ likeĀ everyoneĀ elseĀ andĀ waitedĀ amidstĀ theĀ crowd.Ā Ā
fortunately,Ā theĀ usuallyĀ enticingĀ aromaĀ ofĀ freshĀ humansĀ wasĀ entirelyĀ souredĀ byĀ theĀ mixĀ ofĀ putridĀ bodyĀ odorsĀ oneĀ onlyĀ gotĀ fromĀ travelingĀ allĀ dayĀ inĀ theĀ mostĀ inhumaneĀ conditions.Ā Ā Ā ifĀ sheĀ didĀ haveĀ anĀ appetiteĀ forĀ humanĀ blood,Ā herĀ appetiteĀ wouldĀ beĀ ruinedĀ muchĀ likeĀ aĀ humansĀ wouldĀ uponĀ smellingĀ spoiledĀ poultry.Ā Ā Ā theĀ hustleĀ andĀ bustleĀ ofĀ footstepsĀ andĀ luggageĀ wheelingĀ alongĀ andĀ never - endingĀ conversationĀ wasĀ almostĀ overwhelming,Ā butĀ onceĀ sheĀ heardĀ theĀ familiarĀ rapidĀ patterĀ ofĀ renesmeeāsĀ uniquelyĀ beatingĀ heart,Ā thatāsĀ allĀ sheĀ couldĀ hear.Ā Ā Ā nothingĀ couldĀ prepareĀ her,Ā however,Ā forĀ finallyĀ seeingĀ herĀ mostĀ cherishedĀ daughterāsĀ faceĀ again.Ā Ā
ifĀ herĀ eyesĀ couldĀ produceĀ tears,Ā theyādĀ beĀ streamingĀ downĀ herĀ alabasterĀ cheeks.Ā Ā Ā bellaĀ clungĀ ontoĀ renesmeeĀ tightly,Ā andĀ itĀ wasĀ likeĀ theyĀ wereĀ theĀ onlyĀ twoĀ peopleĀ onĀ earthĀ forĀ thatĀ briefĀ moment.Ā Ā Ā āĀ youāreĀ homeĀ . . .Ā āĀ sheĀ mumbled,Ā barelyĀ aĀ whisper.Ā
Mt Rainier

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edward.
ā it'sĀ coldĀ andĀ humid.Ā youĀ wouldn'tĀ likeĀ it. āĀ Ā heĀ explainsĀ simply,Ā theĀ conclusionĀ anĀ obviousĀ one.Ā he'sĀ nonchalantĀ aboutĀ it,Ā detachedĀ andĀ unemotionalĀ āĀ itĀ hasĀ beenĀ soĀ longĀ sinceĀ heĀ feltĀ atĀ homeĀ anywhereĀ atĀ all.Ā ifĀ anything,Ā hisĀ homeĀ wasĀ whereverĀ hisĀ adoptiveĀ parentsĀ were.Ā theĀ thoughtĀ ofĀ carlisleĀ andĀ esmeĀ bringsĀ aĀ kinderĀ expressionĀ toĀ hisĀ features.Ā Ā ā ah,Ā yes.Ā thatĀ wouldĀ beĀ myĀ father. āĀ Ā theĀ responseĀ isĀ naturallyĀ moreĀ cheerful,Ā noĀ needĀ toĀ fakeĀ emotionĀ orĀ attachmentĀ aboutĀ thisĀ subjectĀ inĀ particular.Ā theĀ politeĀ smileĀ onĀ hisĀ faceĀ evenĀ growsĀ withĀ amusementĀ atĀ beingĀ recognisedĀ asĀ doctorĀ cullen'sĀ sonĀ afterĀ he'dĀ recognisedĀ herĀ asĀ chiefĀ swan'sĀ daughter,Ā Ā ā thisĀ isĀ peakĀ smallĀ town. ā
a Ā fair Ā enough Ā assumption, Ā thinking Ā that Ā bella Ā would Ā not Ā enjoy Ā the Ā climate Ā in Ā chicago. . . Ā nevertheless, Ā it Ā was Ā a Ā strange Ā and Ā unsettling Ā feeling Ā to Ā have Ā someone Ā assume Ā so Ā correctly.Ā Ā Ā people Ā have Ā always Ā been Ā misunderstanding Ā her.Ā Ā Ā there Ā came Ā a Ā point Ā where Ā she Ā grew Ā tired Ā of Ā correcting Ā everyone.Ā Ā Ā not Ā having Ā to Ā do Ā so Ā was Ā oddly Ā refreshing. Ā she Ā almost Ā managed Ā a Ā genuine Ā smile, Ā but Ā something Ā about Ā edwardās Ā stoic Ā tone Ā made Ā that Ā budding Ā smile Ā wither Ā into Ā a Ā flat Ā line.Ā Ā Ā ā not Ā gonna Ā lie. . . Ā i Ā liked Ā it Ā much Ā better Ā when Ā i Ā was Ā invisible. āĀ Ā Ā she Ā sighed, Ā thinking Ā back Ā to Ā her Ā school Ā in Ā phoenix Ā where Ā she Ā could Ā simply Ā blend Ā into Ā the Ā bustling Ā chaos.Ā Ā Ā ā here Ā everyone Ā stares.Ā Ā Ā iām Ā really Ā not Ā as Ā exciting Ā as Ā all Ā that. āĀ Ā Ā laughing Ā awkwardly, Ā she Ā shook Ā her Ā head.
i lived my life good and bad, definitely not light as a feather.
itās finals week! i have an exam / paper due basically every day this week so iāll be spotty at best but then itās summer! which doesnāt even mean anything cause weāre stuck inside
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Ā in honor of MOTHERāS DAY, reblog if your muse is a MOTHER

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everything i wanted // Billie Eilish