Vampire Eddie

“Walker is right,” Alexei said, chuckling a bit. “He is fine. So long as he is not getting all spooky-scary shadow cooped up in there.”

The table went quiet. Alexei seemed surprised by the reaction, his smile fading. Yelena looked up at Bucky, whose eyes had also drifted to Bob’s chair.

The two of them had never actually discussed who the leader of their group was. Yelena had seemed like their leader the day everything went down, which was still etched in everyone’s mind. But Bucky… Well, he was Bucky Barnes. The Winter Soldier. He had more combat experience than all of them combined. But he had never made a move for the title. Instead, the two of them seemed to lead in a clumsy tandem, neither of them jumping to claim the mantle.

Bucky’s gaze traveled to hers. Finally, she found her own concern for Bob reflected in someone else’s face. “Has he missed dinner before?”

She shook her head.

Bucky swallowed. Then with the casual confidence he carried, he cocked his head away from the table.

It was a silent request - Go check on him.

Yelena didn’t need any more prompting. She got up, and rushed down the hall.

When she reached Bob’s door, she knocked hard. Probably harder than was necessary, but some habits died hard. The moment she did, she heard sudden shuffling from inside the room.

Perhaps it was her paranoia from her days as a widow. But it reminded her of the sound of someone rushing to hide something.

“One sec,” She heard Bob’s voice call inside, his voice a bit strained.

To her surprise, hearing him calmed her a bit. He was here, at least. That was something.

“Can I come in?” She asked.

“Just- just a sec.” Yelena folded her arms. 

Not a good sign. 

She heard something closing, then “Come in.”

Yelena stepped inside. Bob’s room looked just as messy as ever, piles of clothes scattered on the floor. He’d refused to use the cleaner Valentina had hired, swearing he “had a system.” Yelena was pretty sure it was bullshit, and he just didn’t want a stranger in his room. She couldn’t blame him for that.

Bob himself was sitting on the bed, looking expectantly up at her. His cheeks had a bit of a shine to them, like he might’ve been crying. 

He gave a weak smile. “Hey.”

Yelena narrowed her eyes. “...You alright?”

“Yeah, of course,” he said, his voice low. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Yelena said, putting her hands on her hips. “Perhaps the fact that you missed dinner.”

Bob swallowed, his face dropping a bit. Unlike Yelena, he wore his heart on his sleeve. Made him a nightmare in the interviews Valentina had briefly tried to force him into, before quickly pulling him. But it had made caring for her friend much easier for Yelena.

He shrugged. “I was busy.”

Yelena narrowed her eyes. “Oh really? With what?” 

His blue eyes met her gaze for a moment, before dipping down to his hands. “Just… busy.”

Yelena gave him a few more moments, in case he might elaborate. But he was silent. 

She let out a long breath.

Part of her didn’t want to ask it. She wanted to give him his privacy. She thought of how it had annoyed her when Bucky had asked her about her drinking habits, and checked how she was doing.

Maybe Bob’s vice was none of her business. But she’d seen how he got when things got bad. She couldn’t sit back any more. 

Not for Bob, or herself.

“So… you would not mind rolling up your sleeve?”

He stiffened immediately. 

Yelena could practically feel the anxiety radiating off of him as he sat frozen. He opened his mouth like he might speak, then rubbed the back of his neck. Yelena only waited as he fidgeted nervously.

When he finally broke the silence, his voice was quiet. “I didn’t.”

Yelena pressed her lips together. “Prove it.”

Bob sat still for a few long moments. He didn’t look up at her, pressing his lips together and tugging at his sleeves. 

Then he let out a sigh, and put his face in his hands.

“I didn’t mean to,” He breathed. Yelena’s stomach sank. His voice was heavy. “It, it just happened, I didn’t…” he rubbed his eyes with one hand, shaking his head as he let out a shaky breath.

Yelena walked over to him, until she knelt in front of the bed. Bob flinched back a bit, his shame plain on his face as he refused to meet her eyes. 

She breathed, lowering her voice. “I’m not mad at you, Bob.” Gently, she rested a hand on his knee. “You’re not in trouble.”

Bob grimaced, scrunching his face as he pressed his hands on his thighs. His eyes quickly began to water. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I know it’s fucked up. It just… I needed it.”

“It’s okay.” Yelena gave his knee a squeeze. “No one’s mad at you.” He rubbed his eyes, his gaze falling again as a tear rolled down his cheek. “Why don’t you tell me what happened?”

Bob let out a shaky breath. “I, umm…” He swallowed. “I was reading… an article. About what happened.” Yelena’s chest tightened. “An, and there were all these comments. Y’know? People talking about… what they saw. What they went through.” He smirked. “Some of ‘em were saying… what they’d do if they ever got their hands on the guy who caused it.” He let out another breath, his gaze still on the floor. His eyebrows furrowed. “So many people are hurting. And it’s my fault.”

Yelena watched as he wiped his face. Bob had already had such an unfair lot in life, and now to be dealing with this… It was more than most could carry.

And if anyone was familiar with unfair burdens…

“Look at me, Bob,” she said gently.

For a few long moments, he didn’t. Then slowly, hesitantly, his blue eyes met hers.

“It is not your fault.” He opened his mouth, but she cut him off. “No. It is not your fault.”

“But I did it,” His voice caught in his throat a bit as more tears fell down his cheeks. He rubbed them with the back of his sleeve, before wrapping his arms around himself.

“That was not you.”

He leaned over, looking across the room as he muttered, “It was part of me.”

“Not the part that matters,” Yelena said forcefully. She squeezed his knee. “You cannot keep beating yourself up for something you could not stop.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “I-if I had just… just stayed in control, if I’d-”

“Bob. Don’t do this to yourself,” Yelena said, standing up and sitting beside him on the bed. “It’s over. And you could not have changed it.”

He shook his head, blinking as another tear fell. “So many people,” he sobbed. “I hurt so. Many. People.” He put his face in his hands.

“Shhh,” Yelena put a hand on his back, rubbing a slow gentle circle. “That was not you.” She closed her eyes, her mind wandering back to her own shame rooms as she forced herself to breathe. Like she’d done so many times, she pushed it aside, forcing herself to focus on her mission. “You cannot blame yourself for something you could not stop.”

“I deserve to hurt. I deserve it,” Bob said, his fingers curling into fists pressed against his forehead. “I-I deserve…” He shook with a sob. “It was my fault.” Yelena felt a lump form in her throat as Bob spoke. His pleas were eerily close to the things she had thought in her dark moments. “It was all my fault!”

“No, no,” Yelena said, her voice breaking a bit. “That was not your choice.”

“But if I hadn’t been there-“

“Then you would be dead,” Yelena said plainly. “And nothing is worth that.”

Bob sobbed for a while as Yelena gently stroked his back. Her own guilt was tight in her chest. How much pain had she caused in her own life? How many lives had she ruined?

Nothing is worth that. 

Maybe she needed to hear it just as much as Bob did.

He let out another shaky breath as he cried. “…I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”

“I know.” Yelena breathed. “That was not you, Bob.”

“A-all those people…”

“I know.”

Bob shook his head. “And I didn’t mean to…” he gestured to his left wrist. “I mean, I tried the breathing stuff, like the doctor taught me. Y’know?” He swallowed, his eyebrows raised as he explained, his words rapid. “But e-everything was just so heavy, and I knew it would all go away once I cut, and then the craving was so loud, so I just…”

“Hey,” Yelena said forcefully. Bob’s blue eyes met hers. “It’s alright. It was a mistake.”

“I’m trying,” He pleaded as he raised his eyebrows, his voice shaking. “I swear, I-I’m trying to be good! But it’s so hard.” Another tear rolled down his cheek. “I… I think about cutting all the time,” he admitted. “It’s exhausting.”

Yelena swallowed. “I know. Better than most.” He looked up at her. “I see how hard you are trying every day, Bob. And I’m proud of you. You’ve been very strong.” His gaze fell, his expression making it clear he didn’t believe her. She tilted her head. “But this is not the way.”

He let out a sob, before wiping his tears with his sleeve. “...I just wanted to make the pain go away.” He pressed his palms to his forehead. “I wish it would all just go away!”

Yelena looked at him for a few long moments. 

“Come here.” She opened her arms. 

Bob looked up. He hesitated for a moment, looking at her as if expecting her to change her mind. But finally, he scooched closer to her. Yelena put her arms around him, pulling him in close. Bob turned to face her, pressing his face into her shoulder as she put a hand on the back of his head.

“It’s alright,” She breathed. “We all give in to the darkness sometimes.”

Bob took and released a few long breaths. “I don’t want to be like this,” He sobbed. 

“I know,” she said, stroking his hair gently. “But it’s alright. We all do things we regret.”

Bob let out a choked sob. “It just hurts,” He shook, his tears audible in his breaking voice as Yelena held him. “It hurts so much!”

“I know. It’s okay.”

Bob stopped speaking then, slowly putting his arms around her and allowing himself to fully break down in her arms. His cries were loud and ugly as he gripped the back of her shirt hard, but she did not shy away from him. She only held him, cupping the back of his head lovingly. 

Despite the changes the serum had made to his body, Bob seemed so small suddenly, curled up in his friends’ arms, shaking with sobs. Yelena held him tight. Anything to calm him, to stabilize him.

Every once in a while he would stammer out an inaudible word or two, his face pressed into Yelena’s shoulder. Yelena pressed her cheek against the top of his head, shooshing him gently and closing her eyes.

Her chest was tight with grief at her friends’ pain. And, maybe, at its similarity to her own. Images flashed in her brain despite herself - of Anya, of her slew of other victims, of the widow she’d killed who had only been trying to save her from the Red Room’s control. Of all the nights she’d drank herself to sleep, the nights she’d wished she just wouldn’t wake up. 

Despite herself, a tear ran down her cheek.

But all that time, she’d been alone. And the man crying in her arms was a reminder that she wasn’t alone any more. And neither was he.

They sat for a long time, crying together.

When Bob finally quieted, Yelena didn’t let go of him immediately. Instead she stroked his hair back a few more times, determined to comfort him.

When he finally sat up she moved back, releasing him. He rubbed the tears from his face with his sleeve, his skin bright red and shiny.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “I know it’s a lot.”

Yelena smiled, wiping her own tears away. “It’s alright. We’re all a lot sometimes.”

For the first time since she’d entered the room, Bob smiled for real. Yelena’s heart grew lighter at sight.

“Let’s get you cleaned up.” She stood up. “Roll up your sleeve.”

Bob looked surprised. After a moment, his face darkened as Yelena headed to the bathroom. “No, I… You don’t have to do that,” His embarrassment was clear in his voice as she opened the door. “‘M okay. I can do it.”

Yelena did not respond. She returned a moment later, armed with hydrogen peroxide, some paper towel, and band-aids.

Bob looked at her for a moment. “...You sure?”

Yelena nodded.

He sat still for a long time, before hesitantly rolling up the left sleeve of his sweater.

Criss-crossing his pale wrists were five scars, angry and bright red, some of them with smears of blood from the inside of his sleeve.

“Sorry,” Bob said, grimacing with discomfort. “I know it’s ugly.”

Yelena’s voice was calm. “I’ve seen much worse, Bob.”

She took his wrist in her hands gently, grabbing the brown bottle. She tilted it, carefully pouring it onto the wounds one at a time.

Bob took in a sharp breath, his arm twitching a bit, and Yelena looked up at him. “Stings,” he said with an embarrassed chuckle.

She smiled. She cleaned his skin carefully as Bob winced. When she finished, she set the bottle aside.Then she grabbed the paper towel, and carefully dabbed his wounds dry. Finally, she grabbed the band-aids.

“Think I’ll live, doc?” He smiled.

Yelena chuckled. “We will see.”

The room was quiet for a few moments as she went scar by scar, covering the deeper parts of each. The band-aids they had were small, and she made a mental note to get some better ones to replace these with.

When she’d finished, she gently rolled his sleeve back down. Bob wasn’t looking at her.

“...I’ve never shown anyone those,” He admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. His smile faded. “My mom saw ‘em once. But she just yelled at me for it.”

“She sounds delightful.” Yelena tilted her head. “Do they hurt?”

Bob shrugged. “Yeah. But… not too bad.” He narrowed his eyes. “It just… it feels really good, in the moment. So then… the pain feels worth it.” He met her gaze. “It almost… doesn’t fully register until after.”

His expression was tense as he watched her, as if waiting for a reaction. But there was no judgment in Yelena’s gaze.

She reached out, gently putting a hand over Bob’s.

“You know you can’t keep doing this to yourself, Bob.”

Bob’s mouth opened. Then he swallowed, his eyes narrowing. “No, yeah. I know.” He let out a long breath. “I just…” He smirked bitterly. “It’s hard to stop. Y’know?”

“Do you want to stop?”

Bob’s smile disappeared. He looked at Yelena, searching her eyes for a few moments. “...I don’t know,” he admitted. His gaze lowered as he gave a small shrug. “It keeps me sane.”

“By breaking you down,” Yelena said. She squeezed his hand. “It’s not good for you.”

He gave a small nod. “Yeah. You’re right.”

Yelena released his hand. She gathered the materials up, heading to the bathroom again. “We should move your next appointment up, to start.” She called behind her. “I will call the office for you.”

Bob let out a breath. “Okay.”

Yelena returned to his side, sitting down next to him again.

The two of them sat in the quiet for a few moments. Bob ran a hand over his curls, letting out a breath.

“I didn’t… mean to get like this,” Bob said, his lips turning in a bitter smile. “So… broken.” He tugged at the sleeve covering his scarred wrist. “I don’t want to need it. It’s so fucked up.” His eyes began to well up. “I don’t know why I can’t stop. It just… feels so good.”

“You’re not broken,” Yelena said. She pressed her shoulder up against his. “This life is so hard.” She stared across the room. “Especially for people like us. People who have been through so much shit. Who have lost things.” She lifted her arm a bit, moving it over his and turning it to clasp his hand in hers, her wrist gently touching his, and met his eyes. “But you are not alone any more.”

He smiled. A tear ran down his cheek, and he wiped it away. “It’s all so much, Yelena,” He said. “I get confused. And I hear things, sometimes,” he admitted, another tear running down his cheek. “The ups are so crazy, a-and downs are so heavy.” He pressed his lips together. “I’m just… I’m really tired of all of it.”

“I know,” she said gently. “But we’ll face it together from now on.” She squeezed his hand. “How does that sound?”

Bob smiled, wiping the tears away. “That sounds nice.”

“We will start by talking to your doctor. Are you still taking your meds?”

Bob nodded. “Most days. I forget sometimes, but… mostly.” 

“Good,” Yelena said. “It’s also time we took your knife out of here.” 

The smile disappeared instantly from Bob’s face. His eyes went round with worry as he looked at her, before he covered it with a forced smile. “Well… I mean, we can work up to that. Right?”

Yelena shook her head. The widow’s gaze was firm, but her voice was soft. “You know we can’t, Bob.”

He sat frozen. His eyes lingered on the ground for a few moments, before he released her hand, and turned to face her. His mouth opened, but it took a moment for the sound to come out. His voice was heavy with desperation as he spoke. “Yelena… Please don’t take it. Not tonight.”

Yelena frowned. “I have to. You know that.”

Bob swallowed. “Maybe… Maybe you can take it in a few days.” He rubbed his upper arm nervously, his voice pleading. “It doesn’t have to be tonight, right??”

Yelena shook her head. “I know you do not feel ready. But it has to happen. You remember when I removed the alcohol from the kitchen?” Bob looked at her. “We have to remove the temptation.”

“You don’t,” Bob pleaded, his eyebrows angling upwards as he pressed his hands on the bed in front of him. “I’ll be good!”

She raised her eyebrows. “Yeah? You can swear you’ll never relapse again if I leave it here?”

A look of guilt crossed his features. She waited, but he did not answer.

“Exactly.” She reached out, gently grasping his shoulder. “You have an addiction, Bob. And it’s going to get better. But not with that in here.”

Anxiety radiated off of him as he breathed quicker, his eyes darting around as if something in the room would give him a reason that would convince her not to take it.

But eventually his gaze settled. He shook his head. “…I can’t. I need it.”

“You don’t.”

She took her hand off his shoulder, and Bob wrapped his arms around himself. “I appreciate your help, really,” he said earnestly, tilting his head. “I just…”  he shook his head. “I’m not ready.”

Yelena’s expression darkened. “You are. We’ll help you.”

“Yelena, please,” he begged, his eyes desperate. “I’ll be good.”

Yelena looked at him for a long time. She recognized his desperation, his addiction. It hurt her to push him.

But she was a Widow. She could push through hurt. 

Bob, however, was not, and her force didn’t seem to be working. She held his gaze for a long time.

“What if it was me?” The room got quiet. “What if I was cutting myself?” 

Bob flinched visibly. “I don’t…”

“Would you want me to stop?”

Bob didn’t look up at her. But after a moment, he nodded.

“And would you let me keep the knife?”

Bob sat still for a few long seconds. He leaned forwards, putting his face in his hands.

“...What if I can’t live without it?”

“You can,” Yelena said. She took Bob’s good wrist in her hand, gently lowering it from his face until their eyes met. “And I’ll help you. But you have to tell me where it is first.”

Bob stared at her for a long time then, studying her eyes. Eventually his eyes welled up with tears, one running down his cheek. For what felt like an eternity, he just stared at her, unmoving.

Then finally, he tilted his head back, letting out an aggravated sigh.

He tucked his feet up, wrapping his arms around his knees.

“It’s in the nightstand,” he muttered.

Yelena patted his shoulder. “Good boy.” She got up, heading to the nightstand. Bob watched forlornly as she opened the drawer, pawed around to the back until she found where he’d hidden it, and pocketed the knife.

“This the only one?”

He nodded.

She sat back down beside him. “I’m sorry to push.”

“S’okay,” Bob said, rubbing his cheek dry. “It’s just… really hard.”

“I know. Can I give you a hug?”

He nodded. She gathered him up in her arms, and he let out a long breath. 

“I’m very proud of you.”

He chucked. “I just cut myself, Yelena.”

“I know. And I’m still proud.”

He sighed. He held her for a few moments. “It’s been so long since I tried to function without it,” he admitted. “I don’t know who I am without it.”

“You’re Bob,” Yelena said, holding him tighter. “You are my friend. You are kind and funny, and also dealing with much more than most people. And you are very important to me.”

He smiled. “That’s nice.” He took in and let out a long breath. “You too.”

They held each other for a few moments as Bob breathed, steadying himself. 

Eventually his shoulders untensed, and he seemed to relax. Yelena released him as he rubbed his nose.

His voice was gravelly when he finally spoke. “…You think I’ll ever beat this?”

Yelena tilted her head. “...I don’t know if this is the kind of darkness you beat, Bob. I think this is the kind you learn to live with.” She met his gaze. “But I do think it will get quieter, and you will get stronger.” She smiled. “You will be alright. And I’ll be here to help you.”

Bob gave a weak smile. “Thanks.” 

“You’re welcome.” She got up, and held a hand out to him. “Okay. Come on. Let’s find something to take your mind off things.”

Bob raised his eyebrows. “Like what?” The Sentry didn’t need the help, but he put his hand in hers anyway, and let her help him to his feet. 

“Whatever you want.” She looked at him. “What do you do to relax?”

He smiled. “I like movies. And ice cream.”

She matched his smile. “Of course you do.” She released his hand and moved it to clasp his shoulder instead. “Let’s get some food in you first. Then we’ll get you some ice cream and a movie.”

“Yesss,” Bob said, pumping his fist.

Yelena smiled.

As they walked, she thought about the tracker app on her phone, slowly climbing with days she’d gone without drinking. She made a mental note to get Bob to download one as they headed through the halls, and Bob rambled about what movies he was considering.

It was heavy. Everything they’d gone through, everything they’d carried with them, and the ugly ways they’d chosen to cope. It was a crushing weight.

But they weren’t alone. Not any more. None of the team was - that was clear when they passed Bucky, and his eyes lingered until Yelena gave a small thumbs up, and he nodded and left them alone. And when John texted Yelena asking if Bob was alright.

They hadn’t been in front of the TV with their late dinners for long before John and Ava joined them. Alexei joined when they took a break to grab ice cream, and even Bucky made his way out eventually - standing in the corner with his hands on his hips, swearing he didn’t want to sit down, no matter how many times he was offered a seat. He wasn’t going to stay, he said. He was just curious about what they were watching.

But eventually he perched on the edge of the couch, grabbing himself a helping of ice cream. When Ava poked fun at his broken resolve, the rest couldn’t help but laugh.

Yelena stole a glance at Bob as they laughed. His smile was bright. She couldn't help but smile herself as she leaned up against him, resting her head on his shoulder.

They weren’t alone any more. 

He tossed another out on the dark water, glancing around to make sure no one was watching. He knew he must look insane.

That was when he heard something behind him. He whirled around, startled. The water was rippling, for sure. But whatever it was was gone.

Steve swallowed, slowly grabbing his bat. He set the bucket down, took another fish in his hand, and tossed it into the water near the edge of the pier.

Steve expected it to sink. But the moment it hit the water, two hands emerged from the depths and grabbed it, before a human head broke the surface.

“What the hell?!” Steve shouted.

The man looked up at Steve, long brown hair clinging to his face, eyes wide with surprise as he clutched the fish. Oh good, it wasn’t a monster, just a crazy person, he thought bitterly.

“Dude, what the hell are you doing swimming around grabbing raw fish?? You scared my friend yesterday!”

The man’s eyes were still wide as he dove back under the water. But instead of a pair of legs following him, Steve saw a long, black tale ending in a fin.

“What the hell?!” Steve took a step forward to look closer, only he’d forgotten about the bucket. He collided with it immediately, the bat falling out of his hand as he stumbled off the pier, and smacked his head hard on one of the boats on his way down.

The moment he did, everything went black.

When Steve came to, he was on his back, staring up at the stars, noticeably not dead. He gasped, sitting up, eyes wide remembering what had just happened, his head still throbbing with pain. “ Fuck  that hurt.”

“You okay man?”

Steve looked up. He was on an unfamiliar part of the beach, and a few feet into the water, everything but his head and shoulders submerged, was the man from a moment before.

“You!” He stared wide-eyed. “You… what are you?!”

The man raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean? Just a friendly swimmer who helped you out and wanted to make sure you woke up.”

“No,” Steve narrowed his eyes. “No, I saw you! You have a tail!”

He smiled. “You hit your head hard, guy. You’re imagining things. Anyway, I should be going…”

“I saw it!” Steve said. “It had a fin and scales…”

The man pressed his lips together, giving Steve a questioning look. “Mmmno, doesn’t sound like me.” He stretched his arms above his head, giving an obviously fake yawn. “Well, it’s late, I should get back over to my human home with my human family that I have. Thank you for not dying, fellow human, have a nice life.”

Steve gave him a look. “Dude, you have scales on your arms.”

The man looked down at his elbows, which each had a black translucent webbing. “ Shit .” He looked back at Steve. “Look, you owe me for saving your life, so you can’t tell anyone, okay??”

“I won’t,” Steve said, still in shock.

The creature swam up to the shore, and once it did, shimmied awkwardly on its elbows and tail up to near where Steve was sitting, before settling on his stomach, elbows on the ground.

“What… are you??”

The creature narrowed his eyes. “Isn’t it obvious?” He pointed at his tail “Mer,” then his torso “man?” He smiled. “You can call me Eddie though.”

Steve stared, still shocked. “How do you exist??”

Eddie tilted his head. “Well, it all started when my dad fucked a fish.” He smiled expectantly with his sharp teeth. Steve didn’t laugh. “I’m messing with you, dude.” He shrugged. “I dunno. We always have. I just… have a bad habit of going a little closer to shore than I’m supposed to. Don’t tell my uncle.” He flipped his tail up, then back down again. Steve stared at him in wonder.

“Okay, someone slipped me drugs for sure,” Steve said.

Eddie perched his chin in his hand, pouting his lips. “And you didn’t save any for me? Rude.”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “What… happened?”

Eddie smirked. “Well, you saw me, and then you got all startled, and then you fell in the water like a dumbass.” He smiled. “Woulda been funny, but then you smacked your head and it was suddenly way less funny.”

“You saved my life.”

Eddie sat up on the sand, which looked like it took some effort. “Sure did! So… do I get your name??”

“Oh, right. Sorry. It’s Steve.” He rubbed the bump on the back of his head. “Shit that hurts.”

“Yeah, you’re lucky you didn’t crack your skull. You humans are so breakable.”

Steve eyes lingered on the black tail before him. The scales reflected the pale starlight, complete with translucent webbed fins both sides that flapped gently sometimes when he moved. And a beautiful human-like chest, which Steve also couldn’t help admiring, that turned into black scales at his hips. And on both sides of his waist, three slits. Gills.

“It’s rude to stare, dude.”

“Sorry! Sorry,” Steve said, refocusing on Eddie’s dark eyes. “I’ve never met a mermaid before.”

“Merman, technically,” Eddie leaned back on his elbows. “Though you humans are more attached to gender than we are. I don’t really mind either term.”

He looked down at Steve’s soaked jeans. “Gosh, I’ve never seen a human up close. Your legs are so little!” He looked at Steve, his expression serious. “Is that why you fell over?”

Steve felt heat rose in his cheeks. “No! And they are not.”

Eddie smiled at Steve’s obvious annoyance. “But they’re so thin! Not like a tail.” He flapped his tail up again. “How do you get around anywhere??”

Steve glared. “Well, we don’t have water resistance to deal with, for one thing.”

“Ohhh, that makes sense.” Eddie lifted his hand, waving it back and forth slowly. “Must be easier moving through just the air.” He blinked. “Thanks for dinner, by the way.”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “Dinner?”

Eddie pointed behind him. Sitting on the sand was a pile of fish bones and heads. Steve grimaced. “Gross. So you do eat raw fish?”

He gave Steve a look. “I live in the ocean, Steve. What else would I eat?”

Steve shrugged. “I dunno. Kelp?”

“Kelp,” he rolled his eyes. “So, look… you seriously cannot tell anyone about me.”

“‘Course I won’t,” Steve said casually.

Eddie narrowed his eyes. “Really?” Steve nodded. “You just… discover a new species, and you’re not gonna go blabbing?”

Steve shrugged. “I’ve seen some freaky shit over the last few years in Hawkins.” He pulled his shirt off, and began wringing out the soaked garment as he spoke. “Believe it or not, merpeople are not the freakiest thing. Also apparently a lot of shitty scientists hang out in this town, and you don’t need that.” He didn’t catch how Eddie’s eyes lingered on his chest as well. “Besides, I’ve seen too much sci-fi working at the video store.” He set the shirt on his lap and looked back to Eddie, who quickly brought his gaze back to Steve’s eyes. “Wouldn’t want you to get… dissected or something.”

Eddie’s eyes traveled back down to Steve’s waist, and his eyebrows furrowed.

“What?”

Eddie reached out, and touched Steve’s bare waist. “You’re missing your gills.”

Steve smiled. “We don’t have gills.”

“Damn. No wonder you guys never spend much time underwater.” He took his hand back and looked back up at Steve. “Guess I really did save your life.”

Steve smiled. “You’re also the reason I got scared and fell, to be fair.”

Steve looked down at the ridges on Eddie’s waist. “Can I…”

“Go for it.” Eddie leaned in slightly closer.

Steve reached out, gently letting his fingers travel down the flaps in Eddie’s waist. “Woah. That’s crazy.” He pulled his hand back, forcing himself to look back up at Eddie’s eyes.

A chill went down Steve’s back. He shifted his legs. “Shit these pants are cold.”

“That’s what happens when you take a nighttime dip.” Eddie looked out over the water. “This part of the beach is super secluded, that’s why I should be good to be up here. I hunt here all the time, the humans never come over here.” He looked over at Steve. “No one’ll see if you wanna take them off. It’s warm out.”

Steve grimaced. “Yeeeeah, humans aren’t so big on the nudity thing.”

Eddie glanced down at Steve’s hips, then back at his eyes, a flirty smile crossing his features. “That’s a shame.”

Steve looked away from him. Heat rose in his cheeks rapidly.

“Are you okay??”

Steve looked back at the merman, who had a concerned look on his face.

“What?”

Eddie reached out and took Steve’s cheeks in between his thumb and pointer fingers. “Your face! It’s all red all the sudden!”

Steve laughed. “Oh. I’m blushing. That’s normal.”

Eddie narrowed his eyes. “Really? It looks like your cheeks got injured.”

Steve smiled as the merman released his face. “So…” he tilted his head. “…Do I get to reward my rescuer with a kiss?”

Eddie grinned, his tail flipping excitedly. “I suppose so.”

Steve cupped Eddie’s face in his hand, and pressed a long, slow kiss to his lips. Then another, enjoying his soft and salty lips. Finally he pulled back, staring at Eddie’s warm brown eyes.

“These pants are… pretty cold.”

Eddie grinned. “We better get them off you then, huh?”

He stepped up to the door, lowering his voice. “Is it short?”

“Perv. No, it’s a longer one.”

“Does it fit?”

“Yeah.”

“And you like the color?”

“Yeah.”

“So show me!”

Steve let out a loud groan. “You can’t make fun of me.”

“Steve, babe, I’m always gonna make fun of you. It’s my job as your partner.” His smile softened. “But I won’t make fun of this.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

A loud sigh sounded from the bathroom. “You can’t laugh either.”

“I won’t.”

Finally, Steve opened the door, stepping out sheepishly. Her arms were folded over herself, covering the white turtleneck sweater. The sweater was new, but Steve had worn more masculine sweaters before. It wasn’t as much of a change for her. The new addition was a long maroon skirt, reaching down to Steve’s calves.

“Babe!” Eddie grinned. “Look at you!”

Steve glared. “You’re making fun of me.”

“I’m not!” Eddie smiled, taking her hand. Steve gave him a look of disbelief. “Hey. I’m not.” He kissed Steve’s hand, smiling wide. “You’re like a little princess.”

“Stooop,” Steve groaned, pulling her hand back. “I look stupid.”

“You do not, come on!” He smiled. “Does it swish?”

A small smile came over Steve. “Lil bit.”

“Then show me.”

Steve turned her hips back and forth, watching the fabric swoosh around her calves.

“It’s perfect!” Eddie took Steve’s hand, raising it above his head. “Give us a twirl.”

Steve’s smile grew as she twirled under Eddie’s hand, then twirled back around, this time grabbing the skirt with her free hand and making it swish an extra bit.

Eddie laughed with joy, grabbing Steve’s waist with his hand and pulling her in. “My little princess.” He kissed Steve hard on the lips, and Steve wrapped her arms around Eddie’s neck.

“I’m just as tall as you, y’know.”

“Mmm no, don’t think so,” Eddie said, kissing her neck. “Lil princess.”

Steve punched his shoulder gently, then closed her eyes and relished the feeling of her partner’s kisses.

Finally, she pulled back, looking down at herself. “You’re sure I don’t look stupid?”

“Nah, you look great.”

Steve let out a long breath, then spoke again, her voice quiet. “I feel like…” She frowned. “Like maybe I just look like a stupid guy in a dress.”

“You don’t,” Eddie grabbed her hips again, pulling her in close. “You look like my pretty girl.” He kissed Steve’s forehead gently, and put one hand on her cheek. “Besides, nuthin’ wrong with a guy in a dress.” He smiled. “You can be whatever you want.”

Steve looked down. “That’s not what my dad would say.”

“Yeah, well, your dad sucks.” He kissed Steve’s cheek. “He doesn’t deserve such a pretty daughter. Or kid, or son, or whatever you wanna be.”

Steve let out a long sigh, wrapping her arms around Eddie’s neck. “Whatever I am, I’m lucky to have you.”

“How lucky?” Eddie’s tone was flirty as his hand slipped down to the skirt, taking the fabric in his hands. “Maybe… get to the bedroom and get this off of you lucky?”

Steve leaned back, rolling her eyes. “Eddie there’s three more skirts in there to try on.”

“Good, then you’ll have something to change into when we’re done.”

Steve slapped his arm. “Asshole.” She couldn’t help but smile. “Maybe if you carry me.”

Eddie tightened his grip around Steve’s waist, grabbing her thigh in his other hand, hoisting her upwards and kissing her lips.

The arms wrapped around him were black and leathery, torn up and damaged with pink scars underneath. He racked his brain for what this might be, but came up empty. The only bipedal monster they’d run into was the demogorgon, and this creature wasn’t nearly big enough to be that. Was it some sort of inbetween, some adult demodog not yet a demogorgon? It’s growl didn’t sound like the demogorgons, more like a wolf or a mountain lion.

Either way, if Steve couldn’t get away, he had a feeling he’d never get home. His vantage point wasn’t optimal either - he was being dragged backwards through an unfamiliar space, and couldn’t keep track of where they were going. He was at least grateful he wasn’t being dragged along the rough ground, like the last time he was here.

He watched as a doorframe moved around him, and a door was slammed behind. He grabbed for it desperately, but his reach was limited. It looked like they were in some kind of shed.

Once they got to the middle of the room, Steve was thrown to the ground on his stomach, the wind knocked out of him.

He scrambled to his hands and knees, his fight reaction pumping his heart in his ears. He raised his head, and finally got a good look at the monster.

“…What the hell?”

The monster, also on its hands and knees, was humanoid. The ‘skin’ Steve had seen on its arms wasn’t actually skin at all, but a torn and tattered black jacket. The skin of the monster was a sickly pale-gray color, its eyes entirely blood red and glaring as it snarled, bearing its teeth. It was human in shape, but its - his? - teeth were all long, and sharp. He had long brown hair and pointed ears that stuck through it, and on the tips of his fingers were sharp black claws. His face and chest were covered in scars, his shirt tattered and torn. 

For a moment, his features looked strangely familiar. But it couldn’t be.

Steve tried to get to his feet, but the moment he did, the monster was on him. It knocked him back to the ground, grabbing his wrists and growling out at him as he writhed underneath him, trying to kick him off. It was no use. The claws dug into his wrists as he struggled, making him cry out in pain.

“No!” Steve cried out. The creature looked vaguely human, maybe it could understand him. “Let me go!”

The monster glared down at him, growling loud, it’s sharp ears pointed back.

That was when Steve got a better look at the torn up shirt. It was beaten and stained, but Steve could barely make out a red, demonic face, and a few scattered letters that used to form a familiar club name.

Before Steve could get his thoughts together, the monster dipped his head down, biting his teeth deep into Steve’s throat.

“STOP! EDDIE!”

The monster froze, his teeth still embedded in Steve’s flesh, the pain bringing immediate tears to his eyes.

“Eddie please, please let me go,” he begged.

For a few moments, there was silence. Steve stared up at the ceiling, chest heaving with Eddie’s weight pressed onto his body.

After what felt like an eternity, the monster’s teeth released Steve, making him cry out. He lifted his head, staring down at Steve with a mix of confusion and anger, blood running down his cheeks and dripping onto Steve’s shirt.

Steve noticed his eyes, which had previously been red, were now entirely black.

Steve grimaced. “Can you understand me?”

The monster’s eyes were completely blank. Steve tried to squirm, wondering if he might release him, but the monster growled in response, bearing his teeth. 

“Okay, okay, sorry. That’s a no.” Steve swallowed nervously. “But… you know that name? Eddie?”

The monster blinked, seeming to register the word. Steve reminded himself to breathe. “That’s you. Eddie. That’s your name.” Eddie tilted his head, like the way a dog would when you use words like ‘walk’ or ‘treat.’ Only Eddie’s new form was much more dangerous than a dog.

“Yeah, Eddie. You know that one.” Steve said as more blood dripped down onto his shirt. The monster seemed to notice, and licked his face. “Eww, god,” Steve said, closing his eyes tight. “Look, you know me.” The monsters’ grip didn’t lessen. “My name is Steve. I’m your friend. Do you know ‘friend’?”

The monster stared at him for a long time. 

“Okay, maybe not,” Steve breathed. “…You know Dustin?”

Eddie blinked, suddenly giving Steve a sad look. 

“Yeah, you remember Dustin? Right?”

Eddie stared at him.

“Dustin, he’s Eddie’s friend,” Steve said. “A- and Steve, Steve is Dustin’s friend.” He swallowed nervously. “And… Steve is Eddie’s friend too.”

Steve tried to shift his legs, but the monster growled again. “OKAY, okay,” Steve breathed. “Look, I’m not gonna hurt you, Eddie. I promise.”

The monster stared at him for a long time. Steve suspected he had no understanding of the sentences Steve was stringing together, and wondered if he was getting through to him at all. Then slowly, he released Steve’s bloodied wrists, crawling back until he was sitting at Steve’s feet, staring at him.

Steve sat up slowly, holding his injured wrists. He stared at Eddie’s black eyes as he caught his breath. “…thank you.”

Steve let out a long breath. “I can’t believe you’re alive. What happened to you??”

Eddie’s gaze was totally blank.

Steve rubbed his eyes. “Look, I gotta go home. I can talk to Dustin, we… we can make a plan. We can find a way to help you. Okay? Are you… understanding anything I’m saying??”

Still a blank, black stare.

Steve got to his feet, and took a step to his left. He had to get around Eddie and to the door.

Suddenly Eddie began growling again, crawling towards him, glaring fiercely.

“Okay, okay,” Steve put his hands up and got down on his knees. “Yeesh, you did not like that. I get it.” He ran a hand through his hair. “But… I gotta go home, man. So do you. Somehow.” He groaned.

He looked around the space, and after seeing the fishing lines and tarps, he blinked in surprise, suddenly realizing where they were. “This is the boat house by Reefer Rick’s!” He looked at Eddie, who only stared. “You took me to the boat house! You remember this place??” Nothing. Steve smiled. “But you remembered it. You’re still in there, aren’t you Eddie?”

Eddie didn’t respond, only brought his boot up and began to scratch his ear with it.

Steve laughed, and the monster tilted its head again, like he didn’t expect the sound.

“Sorry. You just… it’s kinda silly.” A few moments of quiet passed. “So… why’d you bring me here? I mean, when you grabbed me I thought a monster was trying to eat me.”

Eddie only stared, and Steve looked at some of his blood on Eddie’s chin that his tongue has missed.

He stopped. Steve’s smile faded as he realized.

Eddie had tried to eat him. Or at least, tried to drain his blood, or something. That had been his plan, before Steve stopped him.

He was dragging his prey back to his den.

Steve swallowed nervously. “There must be stuff for you to eat down here,” he said. But was any of the food in the upside down even edible at this point? Plus, from the way Eddie had licked his lips, Steve got the sickening feeling his tastes were more geared towards live beings. And since they’d burned up the hive mind again…

Eddie’s cheeks were hollow and hungry. Steve looked at his chest through the tears, and it looked flat. Hungry.

“Are you… starving down here?”

Eddie didn’t respond, only walked a quick circle, then curled up on the dirt floor in a ball.

Steve swallowed. “Is this…” he held up his wrist. “Is this what you eat now? Blood?”

Eddie didn’t respond, only closed his eyes.

“Fuck, man,” Steve breathed.

Getting Eddie home like this was gonna be hard enough. Getting him home and keeping him fed was another matter entirely.

Eventually Steve got tired of being covered in blood, and got up to look for a towel.

Eddie immediately tensed, raising his head with a low growl.

“Relax, I’m not going near the door,” Steve said as he headed towards the vine-covered wooden crates and racks. “Just need like a… towel, or a washcloth.”

Steve instead found a crumpled up t-shirt tucked away in one corner of the boat house, and figured that was about as good as he was gonna get. He shook it out, and sat up against one of the crates, beginning to dry his wrists with the shirt. The claw marks burned, and he winced a bit as he dried them.

He heard a low whine from across the room, and looked up. Eddie was looking over at him, a sad look on his face, his ears facing down.

Steve blinked. “Hey, I’m okay,” He gave Eddie a smile, waving at him. “I’m fine, see? These’ll heal up in no time.”

Eddie looked away from him, black eyes still sad. Steve let out a breath.

Eddie really was in there.

He finished drying his wrists, then began on his neck. He closed his eyes tight, trying not to think too hard about the deep, painful divots Eddie had made in his skin. When he pulled the shirt down, it was covered in wet blood.

Steve hadn’t realized Eddie had gotten up on his hands and knees again, until he started crawling forward. Steve looked up, and his heart started beating a bit faster.

Like when he’d first seen him, Eddie’s eyes were blood red. His gaze was fierce, and his ears were angled back.

“Woah, hey,” he got on his knees, one hand out, though he didn’t dare stand. “It’s me, Eddie.” Eddie blinked, but his eyes remained red. “I’m your friend,” he said as he crawled backwards, trying to maintain distance. “You don’t want to hurt me.”

It was then that Steve realized - it was hard to tell without visible pupils - that Eddie wasn’t looking at him. His eyes were trained on the bloodied shirt.

Steve swallowed. “Is this what you want, Eddie?” Eddie glanced up, then back at the shirt. He held the shirt out, and Eddie froze.

Here goes nothing, he thought. He swallowed, and tossed the balled up shirt forward.

Eddie grabbed the shirt in his mouth, and rushed over to the door of the boat house. For the first time since they’d entered, Eddie stood up, body curled away from Steve. But Steve could’ve heard the sound of fabric tearing, and an aggressive sucking noise.

“Gross, dude.” Steve put his hands on the ground, taking a moment to catch his breath. His stomach turned at the noises.

Eddie was in there, that much was true. And he recognized Steve, on some level. But how long would he be safe stuck with this animalistic version of his friend, that seemed to get nearly possessed with hunger?

Eventually Eddie dropped the shirt, and curled up on the floor again, still in front of the door. His eyes were back to black. The shirt was in tatters in his hand.

Steve swallowed, slowly crawling a step further. “Eddie… you’ve been starving down here, haven’t you? All alone?”

Eddie watched Steve, but he showed no signs of understanding him, his ears twitching slightly.

Steve’s stomach turned as he realized what he had to do.

Steve swallowed. “We have to go home. Home to Dustin, and the others. They can help us.” His ears twitched on the name, but he showed no sign of understanding what Steve was saying. “But to do that, you have to be safe to bring home.” He swallowed. “I need you to be safe.”

Eddie stared at him, gaze still blank.

Steve let out a breath, then moved a bit closer to Eddie, who raised his head.

“You brought me here ‘cuz you’re hungry, didn’t you?”

Eddie sat up, gaze suspicious, his ears flipping back.

“It’s okay,” Steve said, holding a hand out. “Do it.”

Eddie blinked, like he didn’t understand. Steve pulled his collar down and pointed to the wound, and Eddie immediately shrunk back, his ears flipping down.

“No no no, it’s okay,” Steve said, trying to inject as much warmth into his tone as he could with how terrified he was. “I want to help. And I trust you.”

He wondered how stupid he must look, gently coaxing this ravenous version of his friend towards him. He thought of Dustin, and the way Steve had treated him like an idiot for taking Dart in, and assuming it would never hurt him. And here he was, doing the same thing.

He wanted Eddie to hurt him, so Eddie would be okay. But he also needed to not die in the process.

He wished Robin or Dustin were here. They were the planners, Steve was the one who followed through. Here he was, no plan, no safety net, offering himself to someone whose self-control seemed limited at best.

Steve sat back on his knees. “Eddie, c’mon,” Steve pleaded. “You’re hungry. You gotta eat.” He forced a smile. “I’ll be okay.”

Eddie looked at him, and his eyes suddenly swirled into a familiar red. Steve forced himself to breath as Eddie’s scared look turned into a snarl, his ears flipping back.

Steve swallowed, moving back.

Suddenly, Eddie lunged for him, grabbing his shoulders hard, claws digging into his shirt. He struggled to move backwards, scared of what might happened if he got stuck underneath Eddie like this. He backed up against a crate as Eddie looked him in this eyes, snarling and snapping his teeth at him.

Steve flinched, closing his eyes tight. “I know, I know,” he breathed, balling his hands into fists. “Do it. Just… please don’t kill me.”

There was a moment of quiet. Steve felt Eddie’s grip loosen, and he opened his eyes.

Eddie was leaning back from him now, eyes black again and wide with horror. He curled his head down, grabbing his face, and letting out a shrill scream.

“Hey, Eddie! EDDIE!!” Steve shouted, grabbing his shoulders. Eddie looked up at him, and Steve realized there were tears on the corners of his eyes. “Shit. Look, I know you’re really scared right now, and I am too, but I need you to do this, okay??” He yanked at his collar, drawing Eddie’s attention back to his bloodied neck.

Eddie’s eyes swirled red, then he blinked frantically and grabbed his face, eyes swirling back to black.

“Eddie,” Steve breathed, taking his wrists in his hands and pulling them gently off his face. “It’s okay.” He leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to Eddie’s forehead, then leaning back and smiling. “I’ll be okay. I know what you need now.” He tilted his head. “Do it.”

Eddie stared at the him, then the wound, then back into Steve’s eyes.

“It’s okay Eddie. You’re my friend. I trust you.”

One of the tears ran down Eddie’s cheek. He stared at Steve’s eyes for a few more moments, before he leaned in, and bit down hard on Steve’s neck.

Steve gasped in pain as Eddie’s teeth dug into his skin, his chest pressed up against him, shoving him up against the wooden crate.

“Jesus,” Steve breathed, closing his eyes tight as Eddie swallowed him down voraciously. Eddie’s teeth gripped his already-wounded neck hard, his swallows loud and his lips clumsy and desperate as his hands extended out, trapping Steve against the crate.

After a moment Eddie let out a low whimpering sound between swallows, as if he realized what he was doing. “Shhh,” Steve reassured him gently. “S’okay. I’ll be okay.” 

He reached a hand up, and ever so gently, began to stroke Eddie’s hair. He whimpered again, and Steve twisted his head a bit, wincing with pain as he gave Eddie’s temple a gentle kiss. “Take all you need, Eds. I’m okay.”

After what felt like an eternity, Eddie finally pulled back from him, licking his lips. When he did, he blinked in surprise, as if he was seeing Steve for the first time.

“Hey. Feel better?”

Eddie stared, then opened his mouth.

“S…” he said in a low hiss. “…Steve.”

Steve’s eyes widened, and a smile came over him. “Hey! Yeah, Steve, that’s me! You can talk!” Eddie blinked. “Can you… understand me now?”

Eddie’s stare was blank once again.

“Can you say anything else?”

“Ssssteve,” he said slowly, like it was difficult for him.

Steve let out a breath. “I’ll take it.”

He grabbed a tattered towel he’d noticed earlier - after settling on the shirt, ironically, and laid down. “Get some sleep. We’ll try to get you home in the morning, okay?”

Steve spoke as if it was the evening, but he had no clue with the indeterminate blue sky outside the boat house windows.