冷たい

                                    As loved & supported by 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘.                                                                                             she/her, 29

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑

This blog will have some heavy themes, not excluding violence and abuse, and I don’t feel comfortable writing with others under 18 and I absolutely WILL NOT ship with anyone under 21. Also won’t follow anyone without age posted somewhere on their blog. This blog is also exclusively for the manga timeline! I won’t be participating in threads that treat him as the game rival without prior communication. 

𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐒

Sporadic activity, as I both work full time and am also working towards a degree. Replies come when they come.

𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒

ABOUT

RULES

HEAD CANON

BLOG CANON

META

Silver’s words, much like daggers, cut through the frail defenses she’s set up before daring to ask a question of that nature. She should’ve known better than to expect differently from Silver’s harsh responses and yet they still left behind a subtle twinge of pain. The reminder of the incident they’ve had with her Haunter in the past never failed to draw in a tired sigh from the trainer, too.

“… It might not look like it, but I always consider the risks before acting, you know?” Arms crossed before her chest, shoulders hunched ever so slightly. “B-but sometimes it’s important to move forward despite knowing something might go wrong… Take it as a leap of faith.”

Try as she might, she couldn’t hold back Silver’s cold gaze for much longer. She let out a last sigh of exhaustion —mayhaps a little grievance. 

“I do have my own reasons for doing what I do. I’m not completely senseless.”

    𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍. Mentally, he’s counting to ten, not wanting to exacerbate the situation despite his best efforts. He recognized her posture -- timid, defensive, perhaps on the verge of fleeing -- and is walking through the steps of controlling his responses that he’d been trying to grasp. Silver bites the inside of his cheek. 

    What was he supposed to do? Just let her wander on her merry way from one danger to another just because she happened to not die the last few times? It annoyed him how she downplayed it, how she acted like none of it really mattered just because she came out alright at the end, how he felt watching her tempt one disaster after another.

    Why should he just have to be okay with nearly watching her die?

    “I don’t think you’re senseless.” He’s trying to be careful with his words. Trying. But her insistence on the matter only frustrates the boy who already struggles to communicate his care. “You’re just reckless. Just because you think about what you’re doing doesn’t suddenly make it thoughtful.” 

    𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐈𝐌. His memories of this man are a passing dream most days, fleeting, and always followed by a trail of destruction. Fitting, he supposed. Neither of them lived in worlds of warmth, and as such no encounter had been gentle. 

    The odd, discomforted look on the boy’s face had more to do with the internal conflict than actually seeing his father, but as thoughts collide in their rush to be the first to escape into words, none do. So he settles only for a shrug instead, his hands shoved in his pockets to keep them from fidgeting. 

lmao it's fine anon. It's actually a reference to a plot point from the manga in regards to Silver and Blue's backstory, where they had to wear masks to keep their faces and identities covered while they were in captivity. It's just halved.

    OOH THIS IS A GOOD QUESTION. And something I really wish Kusaka had explored, but he really didn’t put as much attention on the JohTrio arcs as he did others jojigfjogdf

    Short answer? Panic. 

    Longer answer, I think it would genuinely shake him in ways he’s never really allowed himself to express with his other issues. Silver’s trauma is a hard thing to address mainly because he doesn’t let himself address it in ways that aren’t deeply self-destructive. We see throughout his arcs in the manga that when it comes to confronting these things, be it in battles against Pryce or confronting the barrage of expectation that he’s going to be like his father from Giovanni’s own underlings, he’s more inclined to a kamikaze approach to the problem than having to address it directly. In both occasions of GSC and HGSS he had at least one plan that involved taking himself out specifically to bring down his enemy. 

     Silver coming face to face with Ho-Oh doesn’t let him do that. 

    Unlike Blue, Silver didn’t get the fear-induced aversion to bird-types that kept that event fresh in his mind, likely because he was so young when Ho-Oh kidnapped him that he wasn’t capable of fully processing what was happening. And piling on the trauma from that brought on no small amount of trauma-induced memory loss.

    But in a scenario where he has to confront the legendary bird again all of that would come flooding back. He would lock up almost immediately; not run or scream just...freeze. All that mental and physical training going blank and useless in his head, because Silver has a visceral, primal fear of it. And he knows in his mind that it’s irrational -- between Pryce and Lance, he knows that Ho-Oh was being forcibly controlled and didn’t have a say in what happened to any of the kids it was made to steal away. And as he’s grown to better understand the bond between himself and his pokemon, now that he’s allowed to have that, a part of him does want to be empathetic. It was a victim of Pryce just like he was, just like his Gyarados, and like the other five Masked Children who experienced the same thing he did. But being put in a scenario where he would have to apply that is extremely difficult for him, because his past is something he’s still struggling to heal and the path he’s taken to do so has only expedited the process. 

    𝐈𝐅 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐍𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄, some poor old granny waddling through the streets of New Bark Town might have been startled into calling the authorities at the sight of a red-haired boy breaking through the latch of a local heroine’s window. But Silver hadn’t had that problem since his infamous thievery of Elm’s lab half a decade ago, his toolwork as silent as his step. Not that it mattered; it was unlikely anyone would have heard him anyway with the shrill voice ranting and raging inside. Something that, as he leaned halfway through the now open window, he was set to tell her.

    “You’re very loud tonight.”