Ren's Journey in Unmasking

Normalize "abnormal" speech patterns. Normalize lack of eye contact, normalize ticking, normalize emphasis on different syllables. Normalize "Inappropriate" emoting, especially when it's a stress response.

Normalize verbally processing thoughts, external system communication, non- aggressive interaction with hallucinations or delusions.

Thanks to Autistic hyperfocus, I've developed these skills:

Thanks to my special interests, I've learned a lot about these subjects:

If I wasn't Autistic, I never would have gotten to know these people who are important to me:

If I wasn't Autistic, I never would have had these experiences:

If I wasn't Autistic, I wouldn't have these awesome personality traits:

Good at certain video games, reading hiragana/katakana, knowledge about Japan's history, myths, and culture (including being able to navigate and plan a trip to Japan for my honeymoon), knowledge on child development, tutoring, and skills that revolve around understanding and communicating with children of many different age groups as an educator, decent writing skills for this day and age, reading comprehension, media analysis, live TV production, documentary production, video editing, more tech knowledge than the average bloke (still lots of room for me to improve here!), knowledge on history of various places and times that I'm interested in, knowledge of Greek myths (current hyperfocus, learning lots), maybe I should just say lots of "trivia", hahah.

Thanks to my special interests, I've learned a lot about these subjects: Oh gosh, continuing from above: video game history and trivia, specific production details of LotR and many video games I love, like the Silent Hill series, Star Trek lore (another current hyperfixation I still have a lot to learn about), Japanese food, Pokemon, psychology, true crime (trying to cut back because it's kinda bad for my mental state and I do have some moral/ethical concerns about it), and other nerdy stuff like lore for my favorite video games, movies, tv shows, etc.

If I wasn't Autistic, I never would have gotten to know these people who are important to me: My husband! <3 My friend I often see plays or shows with and share several of the same interests with. My weekly TTRPG group. Actually, all of the people I play TTRPGs with. Kids I've worked with and seen grow and sometimes think of, hoping they're all doing well wherever they end up out there.

If I wasn't Autistic, I never would have had these experiences: Most likely going to Japan and having the trip be exactly the way I had always dreamed. I refused to go when I had several "chances" to before because I didn't want to compromise in my approach to going. I planned and saved for ten years and when I went, I was able to indulge in anything and everything while I was there, without concern for finances or needing to be concerned about friends or other people in a tour group. I had a meaningful socializing experience due to staying with a host family for part of the trip, something I would have likely compromised on if I wasn't neurodivergent because it was expensive and took a lot of research and communication and planning to make happen. Every little thing we did, it was due to my intense planning and research, and I'm proud and grateful for that.

If I wasn't Autistic, I wouldn't have these awesome personality traits: My passion for the things I love, my empathy toward other people, my work ethic, and my mask that does allow me to be very patient with "difficult" people when I have to, allowing me to function as a peacekeeper when necessary, my vulnerability.

Being Autistic is hard, but it has made me resilient in these ways:

"There was no autism diagnosed before 1930."

2. Now I feel injustice in the way it was handled. It brings back memories of how that year I began to mask my stims and other things about myself I realized were deemed unacceptable to my classmates and teachers. I feel bad for the child version of myself. I want to have someone that could advocate for all the times I was misunderstood. When I was drawing on my homework it was seen as an insult to the teacher, the confusion I had in math class meant I wasn't paying attention, and when I did my homework wrong or misunderstood the directions, I was being obstinate. Being put in advanced classes for English meant that I couldn't need help in subjects like Math - it simply meant I needed to apply myself. If only I had someone that cared to explore what was going on with me, maybe I wouldn't have had to create a whole new version of myself to be when I wasn't alone. 3. Awkward. Childish. Self-absorbed. Disgusting. Embarrassing. Clueless. Stupid.