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I’m writing this story so I can help others gain clarity about how disadvantaged the modern male is regarding mate selection and how he doesn’t really have any choice about the kind of partner he wants and how he as a man is expected to just accept whatever is thrown at him by society and fate.

It’s going to be heavily blackpilled & borderline misogynistic but I can assure the readers that at the end they will come out with answers, truth and a greater peace of mind.

So, the story starts. I was a regular quy who was raised to respect women and believe that they were some kind of angels and that you should always respect them. I grew up with this mindset that they were noble and not so superficial as compared to men. But, this illusion was soon to be broken. Fast forward and I was in 9th class and we had this ritual/tradition in our school that out of the 4 houses, the one who won at the end of the academic year (it was a boys school btw) the students of that house would get the chance to dance with girls (it was the the branch for female students of our school which had separate campus) in a ball dance party.

My house had won when I was in 9th class so around the month of September in 2016, this party was kept. I didn’t know anything about what was going to happen. I only had tid bits of information from my classmates that guys would have to go around and talk to girls. The day came & I reached to the venue 1 hour late. The program had already started and I went in and at first I was a little surprised because I had never seen anything like this. Girls were seated in a parallel manner at the opposite ends of the rectangular hall and boys were moving in a line asking them if they would like to dance with them.

For the first one hour I was just roaming, moving in the line, reaching to the end and then again starting from the beginning. Everyone was just dancing and enjoying and I was just moving aimlessly waiting for on oppurtunity. It was taking long since a lot of them were sitting in groups and something told me not to go for the one sitting in a group (warna aur beizzati hogi). Finally, I saw a girl sitting alone and I gathered every bit of courage I had, I had never been this brave and I went up to her and looked in her eyes, extended my hand and asked her, “ would you like to dance with me?” and she said with a devilish smile, “No, thank you” and for a moment I was confused but then I just moved my head in the other direction and started moving since it was so awkward and then I was moving aimlessly again unable to process what had just happened. I wasn’t blaming her, she had the right to choose with whom the wants to go but seeing everyone dancing and being happy, even the biggest nerd of our batch, it really triggered a series of questions. As I was moving, I came across the same place she was sitting before, but this time she wasn’t there she was dancing with some other boy.

Everyone was with someone or the other and here I was roaming alone even though I was surrounded by people. It was already around 6:30 pm by then and by this time I was hoping that somebody would drop me home but I didn’t carry a phone with me so I couldn’t call my driver, so I had to drag on for onother one and a half hour and then dinner was served and the women were sent out and now only the boys remained so they could dance amongst themselves. I danced with some of my friends without any inhibition this time, it helped to get me out of that spiral of questions but somewhere it was still pinching me even though I was seemingly happy. But then it finally ended.

I had my dinner and my dad came to pick me up and when I went back home, I immediately got a call from one of my friends from that evening asking me how it went and everything, he said very enthusiastically that he danced with 5 girls. I also said that I danced with 3 just to bluff. we talked for a while and then I hadn’t even undressed completely that I just lied down and started to think that, “Am I not good enough?” but honestly it was just confusion at this point, I had absolutely no clue why that had happened with me and amidst all that chaos in my head. I slowly broke down and wept for 10 minutes straight in my room but afraid that someone might see I just wiped it off and went about my work. That evening was of the most traumatic memories of my life.

Fast forward, 2 years had passed and I was in 12th now. The boards were one month away and that same friend that had talked to me after that evening was in a relationship since the end of cass 11th. My insta profile was empty but then I got that urge to be in a relationship too due to that peer pressure. I finally gathered the courage and replied to a girl’s insta story and we started talking. She was from the same girls college and was 1 year younger than me. Some days passed and she asked me why I hadn’t posted any picture yet, I tried to avoid it by saying that I will post one after the farewell. The farewell happened in a few days and after a couple of days I posted 2–3 photos, received 80 likes too, that happiness wasn’t long lived since that night I told her that I liked her and had feelings for her, she told me to focus on my boards and that I was like a ‘brother’ to her, it was like as if lightning had struck me, then we gradually stopped talking and she stopped replying to my messages, even stopped seeing them and this whole charade was over within a time span of 20 days.

I focused on my studies and stopped paying heed to all those questions in my mind. Boards got over and I was preparing for competitive exams, but those questions wouldn’t leave my head so they drew me back to the female race again and I again started talking with a girl on IG in may 2020.

Everything was going good, we were talking nicely, I confessed, she told me that we should be friends first. I said okay and went on, then one day I asked for her picture and she sent me one and then she asked for one in return, I sent one to her (after that brozone incident I had deleted all the posts from my profile), after she saw my picture, her replies got dry from the following day. This time I was convinced that it’s something related to the way I look that is wrong but still ignored all those questions since as a man, it’s expected of me to not think about me or what I feel and to just slave away to provide for others, but deep down the confusion was still there. I had taken a drop that year to prepare for competition and in March 2021, the 2nd wave of covid hit and there was utter destruction all around, almost my whole family was hospitalised.

For one week I was in the hospital, we didn’t talk during that period, it was only after that period was over that I messaged her and then we got to know about each other’s state, she was infected too. I was under immense pressure at that time since I was infected but the exams were only one and a half months away. I still picked myself up & worked hard not focusing on anything else. Then one day, I opened up to her about my struggles, my mental struggles and a few days after that, when I was done with studying and took a break, I opened my phone and when I opened telegram. I saw that she had deleted her account. It affected me a bit but I continued my studies, then she came back after a few days. I asked her if something was wrong, she said nothing was wrong. I said okay and then I saw that after a while she deleted her account again, this time I was really confused, I waited for a few days but she didn’t come back. So, I searched for her number on Whatsapp and messaged her but there was no reply, I messaged her multiple times asking what’s wrong but there was no answer. In simple words, I got ghosted.

Now, I was really confused but soon I got into college and by then I had decided that I will only focus on my career since I was pissed that I didn’t get the college I wanted. 1st year went by in a flash. Second year went by too, during the third year year I came across some blackpill content online and I got to know about redpill and what things are females attracted to (in reality) But since I hadn’t tested them out myself to see if they were really true, I decided to do an experiment. I created a fake profile with a photo of a white male model( let’s call him X) on an app that lets people talk to each other and it was indeed right, you could get almost any girl you want if you’re a handsome guy. But that was pretly normal considering the primal instinct of women.

Then I created another profile and used my own picture and guess what I was barely getting any likes. Barely anyone used to accept my message request, even with Indian girls the situation was pretty bad. The one thing that was the most brutal was that a lot of them were willing to open up their legs for that handsome guy in the catfish id. Girls used to like X’s profile upfront, whereas on the other hand I was struggling to get even one girl to talk to me. Even the mid looking girls used to run after that guy.

My self-confidence took a big nosedive and I started feeling depressed. However there were a few girls, like 3 of them that said that I was handsome, but still compared to that guy, it was nothing and later on, I realised that there was a pattern common among all those 3 girls that liked me, all had low self-esteem and have had boyfriends before me, and also had daddy issues. So, for a negular guy like me, the only hope is that the girls who had low self-esteem and daddy issues would give a guy like me a chance. You know the saying that the bare minimum for girls in just treat her right, it’s clearly wrong. The bare minimum is be 6 ft, have fair skin, be handsome and flirtatious and a bit arrogant with her, having money on top of all that is a big bonus. Even the prude ones would only give guys like X a chance to date them.

I could finally make sense about all those previous incidents. Appanently being a normal guy isn’t enough. You have to be 6 ft tall and handsome to even stand a chance. I suggest all guys reading this to read about blackpill if you want to face the reality. You weren’t her first choice, it’s just your turn.

But the rhetoric that girls like bad boys holds little value, girls like self-centered, arrogant and assertive boys, they crave that uncertainty and emotional roller coaster that those kind of guys bring along with them. However, if they stretch it too far and start to misbehave with her, seeing that she’s not liking it then even they will get blocked no matter how good they look. Girls just love attention being thrown at them. Now, a lot of people will say that oh, Indian girls are not like that, it’s not because they want to be prude by their own will, it’s because of the societal shame that is imposed upon them in our society otherwise they will just be as degenerate as girls of western countries and that is why I saw that the girls that were from pakistan, afghanistan, South east asia, China, middle eastern countries like egypt and India showed the most self control. The most degenerate ones were from russia and western countries.

The ones most badly hit in all this mess are the guys who are focused on their career and are naive and gullible. They are torn apart between the choice of working hard with complete focus to build a career or trying to find a mate since all girls are having boyfriends and they might miss out on the opportunity of being someone’s first and last. They opt for arranged marriage at last since they are already 27–28 by the time they become stable financially and career wise and then they come across girls who have had affairs in the past. Then those girls hide their past because those guys seem like a good backup plan and those guys not knowing anything about the female nature fall for the trap and then continue to live a life of lies, lies they are fed by her that they were her first choice. And even if they find out about it later on, even then they can’t do anything since the judiciary is so screwed that if you want to take divorce on the ground that you were lied to before marriage, the judiciary will blame you instead for not being a cuck and accepting her past.

And the girls who had a past, when they get into marriages with naive unsuspecting guys, they are able to put up that drama of them loving only him for only a year or two, then their patience starts to wane since they are not getting that emotional stimulation from their husband so either they go back to their ex’s or find someone new who suits their emotional and physical needs and that’s how they get exposed if the husband is smart and observant.

Since all this was online evidence I wanted to see if it was true in real life too and then I saw my college and it was no surprise that I found boys to be single and girls to be in relationships. The chances of a girl being single was very less and if she’s beautiful then the chances that she’s single at any given point of time is 0. You’ll find good looking guys to be single but never good looking girls.

The hypergamy will never specially in this new world order. But honestly thinking about all this only brought me resentment, hate and anger and took away my peace. Every night my sleep used to get ruined because of this. Yes, I got to know the truth and it was brutal but it was taking a toll on my health, so what’s the way out of this misery?

Don’t get attached to anyone, always prioritise yourself, don’t simp and recognize that you’re enough in your self, you don’t need a girl to make you feel complete. And always know that women only prioritise the following:

1.) Money

2) Looks

3.) Personality (assertive, arrogant, self-centered)